Chapter Text
Asriel warmly looked across the sand on the shore to his date. His secret girlfriend. They had told everyone else they were just going to go hang out by the lake, and technically they were… But it was the first time in a while the two had found some proper time alone with each other. He was happy. He had even begrudgingly stolen a pretty flower from Asgore’s garden just for the occasion. When he handed her that flower and said some corny line, her face lit up the whole world for him. But now the sun was setting, as though it were diving headlong into the lake. Dess was good at hiding her emotions- exceptionally so, but she was no Kris. So of course he knew something was wrong.
His eyes wandered over her, studying her demeanor. He still wasn’t used to seeing her with no antlers, even though it had been a couple months ago that her first shedding happened. Everyone celebrated it, but for some reason he could tell something bothered her about it. The new antler nubs were just barely coming in as they marched into the winter. One of them was flanked by the blue forget-me-not he had picked for her, tucked in an uncharacteristically feminine manner into her hair.
His approach had been pretty hands off thus far, but he needed to find out what was up with her. Being there for her was all he truly cared about. “Hey, Dess…” He began, not really sure how to approach this- or what he was even approaching.
“Yeah?” She responded. Her tone was warm, but her eyes lingered at the sunset in the distance. It was that look he was starting to see more frequently, like she was somewhere else.
“Has anything… Been bothering you lately? Like in the last few months?”
There were a few minutes of silence after he asked, making his concern grow. Still, he waited patiently. It was almost when he was absolutely sure that she wasn’t going to answer that she finally did.
“Have you ever… Done something you really regret? Like… Not just anything bad or that got you in trouble, but… Something really bad. Something that made you know for sure that you were a bad person. And after doing it… That’s all you can think about yourself now.”
Asriel took a moment to process it all. It really was concerning that his girlfriend thought about herself like that. His heart began to beat. He needed to do something, to be there for her- or this could turn out… Badly. “No, I don't think I have, but… That’s what’s bothering you, right?”
Dess nodded silently, closing her eyes. “I can’t stop thinking about it. I can’t stop thinking about how terrible I am.”
“Wh… What happened? What’d you do that’s bothering you so much?”
Dess laid back onto the damp sand, not caring about it getting on her clothes and hair. She shook her head desolately, “I can’t tell you, Azzy. You’d hate me. And you’d be right to do so. I’m awful.”
Asriel narrowed his eyes as his mind started to race, trying to figure out what he was missing. A math equation- solve for x- but he didn’t even know what that equation looked like. “December,” his voice tensed, serious with worry, “Please just tell me what the hell is going on. I’m really worried about you.”
“Asriel,” she used his actual name, “Please don’t.”
“Don’t… What?”
“Don’t worry about me anymore. You shouldn’t worry about someone like me. Worry about everyone els-”
“Shut the hell up!” That got her to lean up from the shore and look at him. She was wide eyed, her boyfriend swore even less than his 7 year old little sibling. “I don’t care what you say about yourself,” he unsubtly started to choke up, “You are the most important person in the world to me. I can’t just stop caring about you. I don’t care what you think you did, I’m still going to be here with you! Whether you like it or not! Because I- I-” His face became slick with tears during that last sentence.
Dess rushed to his side, engulfing her boyfriend in a hug like some kind of moist sandcreature. “Azzy, I’m sorry! Please don’t cry… I-I love you too, okay? Listen I… I still can’t tell you about it. I don’t know if I ever could. But I won’t try to hide my feelings from you any more, I promise.”
It was enough to calm her boyfriend down a bit, and after a while they began to make their way back home. In the darkness of the dusk, neither noticed the blue forget-me-not fall out of her hair and onto the beach.
Dess didn’t want this to happen. It was one of many things which she had unintentionally caused, but she also didn’t want to hurt Asriel. So she decided that she was going to keep her promise to him.
She didn’t want to hurt Asriel, just like she didn’t want to hurt Kris, just like she didn’t want to hurt Noelle.
And yet. And yet. And yet…
-
Dess orgasmed again, just as hard as the last time she had. Was this her second or third time today? She was losing track. That’s what every free day without school was now- wake up tired as hell, do random shit on her computer or play her guitar, procrastinate on her homework, jerk off intermittently until it was late in the night somehow, sleep, and then repeat.
She supposed she was giving herself too little credit, though. She was still practicing her instruments, playing on the sports teams at the school, trying her best to keep up with classes despite her mother’s drastically high standards, taking care of Elly when she needed it (which was apparently always with how busy her mother was), she was going on more secret dates with Asriel to their mutual delight, and also watching over Kris when they came over. Really, she was a busy girl with a social life filled to the brim. She was good at stuff, and enjoyed stuff. Hell, she even managed to start feeling like a normal big sister to Kris and Elly again. None of her mistakes had come up since the incident a couple months ago, and she could almost fool herself into thinking nothing had happened at all… And yet.
She laid the back of her forearm across her eyes as she laid on her bed. All of that comfort, that return to a sense of normalcy, rang hollow. If any of the people in her life knew what she had done to Kris and Noelle, it’d be over. Everything would be over, and so she kept lying to them. The lie hurt, but the thought of telling the truth hurt even more. Especially when… The truth was that she couldn’t stop thinking about it. The only thing that excited her anymore was the thought of them, and the terrible things she wanted to do to them. So it made sense that on days where there were no other distractions, all she could do was try to satisfy herself to no end. Even her sexual experiments with Asriel had become slow-going due to her tastes that she had awakened. It was not that she ceased to enjoy making him stupidly flustered, quite the opposite, but it was just that her mind tormented her with more alluring fantasies.
She opened her eyes and raised her hand to them, recalling what she had finished to. A fantasy of Asriel- younger Asriel, like how he looked when they were Kris and Elly’s age. She groaned in annoyance at her mind. Why did she have to find stuff like that hot??? Couldn’t she at least have a normal fucked up and perverse sexuality? It didn’t help when she caught wind of any transphobic sentiment about how ‘all trans women are pedophilic predators’, and her thoughts immediately went to herself. Hearing stuff like that made her pissed, just like anyone of her friends or family would be if they had heard it too. Surely, they would all fight tooth and nail for her. She could picture it right then, her mother huffing in indignation like she had already mentally prepared a lecture, her father getting physical like he rarely ever did unless someone threatened his family, and the Dreemurrs all rearing their horns to charge, even little Kris with their adorable headband. And Noelle… Well, Dess never wanted her little sister to hear any of that stuff anyway for her own reasons. It’d probably make Elly cry and spiral just as hard as her big sister for no good reason. She scoffed imagining little Elly sobbing over someone telling her that she was a pedophile for being trans- a 7 year old girl a pedophile? It was ridiculous to the point of comedy. But with Dess, no matter how angry that rhetoric made her, she couldn’t help but feel like she proved it true. Images of her friends and family finding out the truth flashed through her mind, picturing their faces as they realized that they would be wrong for defending her over such an accusation. “They would be right to turn on me,” she thought.
She lazily wiped the wetness from her hand on her thigh fur. “Whatever. I’m gonna go take a shower anyway.” Dess slunk out of bed and onto her floor like a corpse, and then picked herself up with an unpleasant grunt. She put on a sports bra and a pair of tight boy shorts, and was mentally ready to wear only that on her way to the bathroom, but she checked her phone for the time. 9:00 PM, read her home screen. On a weekday, there probably wouldn’t be anyone up at this hour- but since it was a Saturday, there was a non-zero chance that someone in her house would still be up. She begrudgingly donned a loose, oversized flannel she kept for cases such as these.
Her thinking was proven correct as she exited her room to see her mother sitting on the couch in the living room beneath the open upstairs hallway. Dess wasn’t really looking for any familial interaction at this point in the night, so she did her best to sneak across the hall to the-
“December,” her mother called to her from the couch without turning her head.
“Dammit.”
“Uh, yeah Mom?” Her mother had now turned to look at her.
“I just wanted to let you know that Kris will be staying over for a sleepover tomorrow night, and I’m expecting you to supervise them and Noelle.” Carol stated.
“Wh-wha? On a Sunday? But don’t we have school the next day?” Dess responded rather confusedly.
“No? It’s a statewide Holiday, though not one the town holds any special occasions over. Still, we’re required by law to have the school closed in observation of it. I figured you would have already had plans, but I’m glad I don’t have to make you cancel anything,” her mother replied tersely.
A fire started to burn inside of Dess’s chest. Why did she always have to be the one to take on the extra parenting? Her mind wasn't even thinking about her other apprehensions to this idea. She puffed, “Why can't you or Dad watch them this time? Why’s it always gotta be me??”
“Because I said so, and because your father and I will be joining Toriel and Asgore out of state tomorrow.” Carol cocked an eyebrow at her daughter’s rising tone.
“Wait, what?”
“Right, perhaps I should have led with that. It’s the main reason for the sleepover- Toriel's parents invited her to a little get-together for the holiday, and she asked if Rudolph and I would like to join them. We accepted.” Her voice was rather monotone with boredom, as though she were actually dreading the occasion.
Dess took a second to suss out the silver lining. “So… If Kris isn't going with them, does that mean Asriel is coming to the sleepover too?” Her tone had perked up a bit, for more reasons than one.
Carol narrowed her eyes with slight suspicion before disregarding whatever she was thinking. “Asriel is coming with Toriel and Asgore to scope out a college he likes in the area while the adults are having their party.”
Dess couldn't help but frown. “College??? But we're like 13.”
“-And you would do well to follow his example. Asriel is at the top of your class and already planning for the years ahead. I wish you would show as much interest as he has for his future."
The anger was back again. She didn’t properly know how to adequately put into words that her mother’s standards were absolutely ludicrous, and that Asriel was just kind of a weirdo. A weirdo she loved, but not someone anyone should hold themselves to as a standard of marking their own achievements. It was like asking for disappointment. “Mom… I’m. Ugh. If the rest of the Dreemurrs are going, why isn't Kris?” She doubled back to the previous thing bothering her.
“I don’t know, dear. It’s not my place to pry into someone else’s parenting. Even if it does baffle me sometimes.” She shrugged in total ambivalence. “But if I were to guess, it’s that most of everyone at the get-together will be adults. It would likely be a boring party for someone their age, let alone Kris.”
Carol sometimes shocked Dess in the way she could go from zero self-awareness to surprisingly well considered in the span of a few sentences. She mentally begrudged that her mom was trying to do something nice for Kris and Elly, and attempted to exit the conversation with a curt “I’m gonna take a shower now.”
“Oh, before you do, you should supervise Noelle while she takes one.” Carol had returned to her prior lounging position on the couch, watching the nightly news and sipping on a glass of absurdly expensive gin. “She’s been procrastinating on getting used to showers instead of baths, but I insisted it’d be good for her to do one tonight instead of using the bath in the master bedroom.”
“Wh- Elly is still awake?” Dess was right to be surprised, 9 PM was the latest Carol usually let her stay up when it wasn’t a special occasion.
“Like I said, procrastinating. I can’t help it that both of my daughters seem to have issues with their responsibilities.” She took another sip of gin, and Dess began to silently fume again. Even if Dess had some issues, it was just flagrantly unfair to drag Elly- her 7 year old girl- top of her class- tons of friends and perfect grades!- into it. Dess wondered if Carol sincerely believed that Noelle was a troubled child, or if she was just trying to guilt her into doing more extra parenting for her. If Noelle had any real issues, Dess was perhaps the biggest potential one. This wasn’t going to solve anything. “I thought some independence to take one herself this time could have been a good thing to usher her into it, but I suppose she might still need some help feeling comfortable with it.”
Dess huffed in indignance. “I just… Ughhh why do I gotta do it?”
“December Comet Holiday!” Carol practically hissed the ‘ce’ in ‘December’, and spat out her middle name like it was a dirty word. “Frankly, you should feel grateful that I give you so many opportunities to prove your responsibility to me! If you want to be treated like an adult so much, then you will take on the responsibilities which you are given. Do I make myself clear, young lady?!”
She hated it when her mother passive-aggressively emphasized gendering her correctly like that, like it was a spoonful of sugar to help the poison go down. Dess stamped her hooves as lightly as she could, just looking to abscond from this brutal encounter. Though she was not happy that her one place to abscond presented more problems that she had thoroughly been trying to avoid just earlier.
Without a parting confirmation to her mother, she spitefully turned toward the bathroom door and knocked, audibly startling the little girl inside. “Oi. Elly. I’m coming in.”
It was then Dess who startled herself, as she had apparently forgotten that people who are about to shower usually take their clothes off before doing so. When she had closed the door and turned around, she was met with a full view of her little sister’s body. The mental anguish which Carol had distracted her from suddenly returned, and brought her palm up to her eyes to shield her face. She verbally stumbled for a moment, trying to find some way to make her reaction not her own fault. “Cheezus, Noelle! At least tell me you aren’t decent before I come in!” Her mind groaned at how much she sounded like Carol.
Noelle just stared at her dumbfoundedly as Dess went to go sit on the closed toilet seat. “Wha? Dess, you’ve seen me without clothes before… What’s so weird about it?” Elly stated in an obviously sleepy tone, yawning cutely after.
She was right, of course. Dess had seen her nude many times before. When they were changing into their swimsuits at the beach, when she helped Elly take baths, and even when Elly needed help putting on a dress for the first time. It was an incredibly mundane fact of life for siblings in close proximity. She had even secretly admired her sister’s cute body many of those times. But those memories came from a world where she had not yet forced her own mouth onto her sister’s, and so to Dess it felt like there was a vast distance. It was a distance that she could not describe to anyone else, and that upon closer examination made her feel a little bit crazy. She slowly lowered her palm in admittance of how strange she was acting. “Yeah. I guess you’re right, just… Y’know, don’t show yourself like that to just anyone, okay?”
That comment was her own way of trying to segue back into normalcy, but even she had the hindsight to realize how off-color it was to say something like that to a 7 year old. Noelle’s confused expression remained accordingly. “Dess, why are you being so weird tonight? Faha!” Dess counted her lucky stars that Elly was not the type to hold such a thing against her, and would likely just chalk it up to her sister having a moment of inexplicable stupidity.
She still averted her eyes from Noelle’s body, like she had suddenly become extremely interested in the tile floor of the bathroom. She pulled her flannel tight to conceal herself, as she felt the tip of her cock already poking out of its sheath. Before she could begin to self-flagellate, she just told Noelle, “I need to take one after you, so you should hurry up and start your shower.”
-
After several back-and-forths debating the existence of teleporting clowns who can turn invisible and suddenly appear to kill people in the shower if they turn their backs for too long, Dess had convinced her sister to get in the shower. “I swear, I’m gonna slug Kris in the arm tomorrow for giving her that stupid fear.”
“...Dess…?” Noelle said from inside the shower.
“Yeah?” Dess replied, lazily resting her chin on the palm of her fist while she was busy looking at her phone to avoid catching glimpses of her sister’s nude silhouette behind the shower curtain.
“... Just checking you were still there, fahaha…” Elly nervously chuckled.
It had gone on in this manner since she had started her shower, and this was the 5th time that she had called out to reassure herself that her sister was still present to protect her from invisible teleporting clowns. Dess sighed quietly, the noise being drowned out anyway by the rushing water. She continued to scroll through her phone, on which she had pulled up an anonymous image forum she frequently lurked on in her spare time. It was not a pleasant forum by any means, and she kind of hated herself for being on it so often. But it was something to help distract her. She thumbed through the threads…
anyone lowkey wanna fuck their big brother?? >~<
The post was accompanied by the cover of some shota incest doujin with obscenely long title. No need to look at this thread, It was likely just OP getting dogpiled with a bunch of people either calling her a retard or emphatically agreeing.
Scroll…
>be me, 18yo cervid boymoder trying to girlmode for the first time
>put on outfit as cute as i can
>regularly file down my antlers cuz im not a luckshit reindeer
>go to convenience store to test it out
>get sir’d by the greasy corvoid moid inside 5 times
is it over? should i just rope already? ive been on hrt for 1 year and it hasnt done shit.
No need to look through this thread either. Dess could automatically envision the replies: people asking her for free nudes to ‘check if she passes’ as though that would help in a fully clothed interaction with a stranger, people telling her she's NGMI and should rope already, and likely a third resentful crowd who were telling her to rope because she started HRT at 17 and that all youngshits deserve to 41%. Garbage. She wondered how people would react if they knew a 13 year old who started HRT at 12 was reading all of this. Dess would be the ultimate luckshit youngshit in their eyes, likely even to the OP who explicitly resented reindeer monsters for assumedly having less issues with genetic sexual dimorphism. Dess pontificated on whether these people’s impotent self hatred really allowed them to be so naively stupid; by the time that she had started HRT, she was already fairly masculinized from an early puberty. It was just nonsense to assume that her being a younger age had spared her from an early neurosis in any manner, especially when she was currently embroiled in neurosis over something else relating to her status as a trans woman.
Scroll…
seriously why are all transbians pedos? we all know it’s not just a meme at this point.
The scant text was accompanied by a horrific image. She had seen shitty drawings like this before, but this one was so laser focused on the topic of the post. It was a poorly drawn caricature of a grotesquely muscular shark monster with stubble and a receding hairline dressed up in the clothes of an anime preschooler, hat and all. The monster was smiling with beady eyes, showing 6 rows of yellowing teeth and clutching an equally as poorly drawn dakimakura with an easily identifiable loli from some normie anime that trans lesbians supposedly liked. She was adorned all over with MAP pride pins, trans flags, and countless texts to let the reader know how much she loved creeping on children. Frankly, Dess had no time to look in more detail, she looked away like she had just seen something which was going to make her vomit. Which was partly true, as she now felt queasy. The steam from the shower didn’t help her either.
Noelle called out to her for virtually no reason again, and Dess responded exactly as she had previously.
Dess stewed on the feelings given by that post for a little longer than she would have liked to, as though she was trying to defeat its narrative in her mind or else… Or else… Or else everything was going to fall apart. She tried not to heave, to steady her breaths to be long and measured despite her fear. It didn’t even make sense to her why it got to her so much- she was bi, not a lesbian! She was literally a teenager dating a boy her own age, something the users of that forum would die for! And yet the thought lingered in her guts. She was somewhat butch in her presentation and usually preferred girls, so was she really that far off from the demographic that the post was trying to deride? Her eyes clenched shut uncomfortably. “It’s not true. You know it’s not true… So why does it hurt? Why does it feel like this is all you are now?” Her head just wouldn’t let it go, berating her over being a nightmarish transbian pedophile. The irony of being 13 was merely brushed off as a sidenote, as her sick paraphilic inclinations were the real nail in the coffin. The way that she hurt Elly and Kris.
The thoughts hadn’t gone away, but it was time to move on now. She needed something else to occupy her mind with or she was just going to continue spiraling. Dess had spent enough time on this board already, and it was only making her miserable. She switched over to another board she lurked on which was less personally noxious to her: the paranatural board. Along with her other numerous interests, a stake in the unexplainable and creepy paired well with her fondness for horror. Her finger piddled through the catalog of threads, and she sighed in disappointment. Sometimes this board was interesting, but today it seemed like it was mostly esoterics obsessed with trad Prophecism. Snooze. She got enough of prophecy worship whenever her mother dragged her to church. Why of all things to fixate on, was the prophecy the most popular.
Scroll…
The three races are vital to protect. They are the only ones who can fulfill the prophecy via their ancestral seed. We know two of them already, so why won’t the government let us know the third? Follow the power and you’ll see that Runish “people” are always the ones trying to stamp down evidence of the third race.
This was exactly what she meant by mundane. People trying to make conspiracies about how an older religious sect which followed an earlier version of the prophecy that featured no heroes were always trying to systemically sabotage chances of the prophecy being fulfilled. That somehow the “Runish” people who were the descendants of this sect were concealing evidence of a subterranean race of people on the inside of the hollow earth, which contained the third hero amongst its population. The image attached was a clusterfuck of low quality jpegs slapped onto a white background with shaky red lines and text darting across it, detailing the many apparent ‘proofs’ of the theory. The connections were tenuous, involving a 4th grader’s understanding of numerology and politicians who posed in photos once together. It was absolutely hilarious to her, and Dess had to stifle a few snorts when going through it all. Perhaps this really was the perfect religion for Hometown, a faith so safe and unchangeable and static that people have to hallucinate threats to its integrity from the outside. No wonder her mother loved church so much!
Scroll scroll scroll…
the image of the smiling demon appears in all major religions throughout the world, but there’s so little information on what it’s supposed to represent. sometimes it’s pink, sometimes it’s gold, sometimes it’s red, sometimes it’s a cat, sometimes it’s a many legged beast, but it’s in nearly every mythology. even now, the ‘smile in the darkness’ is one of the most reported hallucinations during sleep paralysis. this has to mean something, right?
If she was talking about religion, this was more her speed. The post’s attached image was a collage of various ancient art pieces in manuscripts, depictions of fictional smiling cats across the ages, and more modern sketches of catlike smiling cryptids. One of the most modern inclusions was a black and white sketch of the smile with “HAVE YOU SEEN THIS FACE IN YOUR DREAMS?” loudly captioned on it. Despite the fact that she had never seen the face in her dreams, all of these images felt strikingly familiar to her. There was something compelling to her about unique cultures, faiths, and people from all across the world thinking of the same idea even when they were completely disconnected. It was like some secret truth of the world, there must be some hidden meaning behind all of this. It made her want to go out and search for more sightings of this creature, and just maybe find out what it was.
Scroll scroll scroll scroll scroll scroll…
They aren’t even hiding this shit anymore lol. We totally live in a simulation.
That last line got her to pause her scrolling. The OP had posted a well photoshopped picture of the sky with lines of program text just barely visible above the clouds, and an edited version with higher contrast for clarity. Despite the fact that she had the wherewithal to know that it was fake, she couldn’t help but be unnerved. She already knew that most things adults told her to care about were fake and inconsequential, but if all of reality was just a simulation… Then nothing would be real, not even herself. It was a frightening thought, but what frightened her more was that she almost saw some appeal in it. If none of this was real, then if she broke through she could be something else on the outside. Be who she really wanted to be, and do what she wanted to do. All of her faults and mistakes would disappear like magic…
Just before she began to trick herself into thinking that she could see program code in the air, her sister called out to her again. Maybe there was some part of herself that wished to not answer, to disappear completely in an instant, but she also didn’t want to freak Noelle out. So she responded.
Perhaps the paranatural board was not the distraction she needed. She went back to the main page, and pondered which board to click on next. The ‘random’ board was the only other one which she frequented, so she decided she may as well give it a shot.
But there was nothing of value to find, just a bunch of dumb shit that didn’t interest her. She sighed out of abject boredom, scrolling desperately to find something entertaining.
Scroll scroll scroll scroll scroll scrollllllll…
Oh. She lingered for a moment. It was the lolicon thread. A flood of anxiety washed over her as she recalled what her brain refused to let her forget. Surely she couldn’t be looking at this with her sister so close to her, but… Her dick was still firmly out of its sheath. The pleading repression in her head told her that it was creepy, that she had only finished masturbating 30 minutes ago, and that she really shouldn't be looking at this stuff in the same room as Noelle. Another part of her tried to reason with itself, “It’s not thaaat bad. If I’m already gross and thinking about this stuff all the time, why can’t I just look at it while nobody knows… I won’t be hurting anyone by doing this, and it’s not like I’m showing it to Elly or something fucked up like that.”
She caved in and clicked on the lolicon thread, but only managed to scroll through a few images before the water abruptly shut off. She fumbled around with her phone in surprise so bad that she dropped it smack dab on the floor. At least it landed with the screen side down… Just as she was scrambling to the spot it landed, she suddenly heard the metal ringing of the shower curtain opening. Dess froze in place like she was in the middle of taking the last cookie from the cookie jar, looking panickedly at Noelle who was starkly wet and nude. A couple seconds passed before Elly burst out laughing, and Dess nervously chuckled in return. She resumed picking up her phone and putting it in her flannel pocket, trying desperately to conceal the bulge in her underwear which was harder now that she had seen Noelle’s body again.
Dess averted her eyes from her little sister as Elly stepped out onto the bathroom mat. “Uhhh, Dess, can you help me put on my jammies…?”
“Wait, but you still haven’t dried off with a towel yet, right?” Dess inquired.
“Well, yeah but Mom’s not here and she usually helps me with that.”
“So why didn’t you just ask me to help you with that??” Dess wondered if all conversations with her family members had to be this much of a pointless mystery.
“‘Cuz you seem kinda grumpy at me tonight…” Noelle stated in a manner which came off more blunt than she likely meant it to be, and Dess’s heart couldn’t break a little at how she had made Noelle assume it was her fault.
She pinched the bridge of her snout and sighed. “No, no, Elly… I’m not mad at you or anything, I’m just… Mom has been really stressing me out tonight. Sorry.” She told a half-truth, not wanting to pull her sister down further. “I can help you dry off.”
It was an admittedly corny situation for someone of her predicament; having to dry off her naked little sister after a shower. She rubbed the towel as delicately as she could at first, trying to look away from her body as much as possible. When it became clear that Elly would never get dry if she continued to do it this way, she relented. The bulge in her boyshorts swelled at seeing her little sister’s fuzzy underdeveloped body, and she had to exert exemplary control of herself to not let this drying session turn into harshly groping Noelle.
Still, she couldn’t help but pulse each and every time she made contact with Noelle. A few times she was a little rougher with the way she rubbed the towel on her sister, and Noelle thankfully brushed it off as her big sister being rough for silliness’s sake. Her heart pounded at Elly’s sweet giggles. There was just so much to love about her little sister. Too much.
When she was satisfied with how much of a dry fluffball Elly had turned into, Dess said “Allllright, time for you to put on your jammies and go to bed so I can take a shower now.”
Elly peeked her head around at her big sister, cautiously reminding her that, “Uhm… I need help with that, too.”
Dess sighed, not wanting to see how much further she could tow the line tonight. “Right. Yeah. I got you.” She playfully noogied Noelle for reassurance.
Noelle thankfully didn’t need help slipping her panties on. Dess stood behind her, guiding her sister’s arms into the sleeves of the extremely elegant and cute white nightgown Noelle wore for bedtime. The hem of the gown parachuted around her body, leaving only an impression of Elly’s nearly nude body from the places it made contact with. It was almost more tantalizing to Dess. Then it was time for the real part which she needed help with, the corseted drawstrings in the back. Dess fiddled around with them clumsily, only pulling it tight enough to still provide a loose fit on Elly’s shoulders. While she was busy tying them into a knot, Dess accidentally hunched over more than she intended and pulled the strings too close and-
She felt her hardness touch her sister’s back for a moment, startling both of them into jumping slightly. Dess hoped for dear life that Elly would just let it go and not ask, but the next words out of her sister’s mouth were, “D-Dess?? W-what was that? Why did you just get so scared???”
Adrenaline was coursing through Dess again, making her throb harder from the thrill. Maybe just once she could give in, she had been so diligent in the past couple months. “Elly,” she started, once again experiencing a vertigo like she was on the edge of a cliff, “It's something I can't tell you unless you promise to keep it a secret, and not tell anyone. Grown ups would be really mad.” She bit her lip enough to break the skin from how natural it felt to omit just who the grown ups would be mad at. Why was this so easy? It excited her more. She shouldn't be able to get away with this, and yet she knew she likely would.
Elly’s expression furrowed as seriously as she could. With the utmost sincerity, she said, “Dess, I promise I can keep it a secret. I-it’s okay to tell me… Whatever it is, I swear I won't tell anybody. Not even Mom.”
Carol was absolutely the last person who Dess would want to find out about this impromptu escapade, so she supposed it was a good thing that Elly was explicitly ruling her out. Dess knew she would hate herself even more after this, but it didn't matter. She was up above the atmosphere, burning brilliantly as she fell down the Earth at terminal velocity. It would be an impact of magnificent proportions whether she would destroy herself after or not. Her shaking hands clumsily undid the buttons on her flannel, silently exposing her undergarments to the younger girl.
Noelle inspected the bulge in her boyshorts inquisitively, clearly not really sure what she was being shown, but wanting to come off as though she was taking the situation as seriously as she could. It was adorable, and Dess’s dick twitched as Elly innocently leaned down to observe it closer. She could tell that Elly was taking in the scent of her cock leaking through her underwear, and seeing her nose sniffle slightly made Dess blush fiercely.
“Wh-why are your private parts so big…?” Noelle inquired in tone that she was clearly putting effort into making sound very thoughtful.
Dess thought one more time of how important it was to not do this, but the arguments were so far away. Those reasoning voices were trapped in another galaxy she had escaped from. Any remaining sentiment was drowned out by the burning feeling in her heart. She would be disgusting, just this once.
“You can touch it if you want,” Dess added before grabbing Noelle’s hand and placing it firmly on her bulge. Elly looked nervous at the sudden movement her sister made on her behalf without waiting for her response. She was still curious though, and so her hand slightly felt the shape in Dess’s underwear up and down. Dess made a few noises in return that sounded slightly like she was in pain, so Noelle tried to pull her hand away. Just as her hand left the shape, Dess grabbed her wrist and guided her back. “It’s okay Elly it just, nhhh,, feels really nice when people touch it. It’s, hhh, what happens to your private parts sometimes when you grow up. Mhhh… Here… I’ll give you a better look.”
She slid her boyshorts down her thighs, allowing her wet length to flop out at a throbbing 90 degree angle. Noelle looked stunned and even more confused. “Woah… It’s way bigger than mine… I can’t even get my tip to poke out.” She was trying to relate the situation to her relevant knowledge on the topic, what little it was. The obvious lack of knowledge made Dess leak slightly, and she guided Noelle’s hand back so she could enjoy her little sister’s exploratory touches.
“Well, I know I just saw yours, nhhh,,, but how about we compare ours? It’s only fair that you show yours off if I’m showing mine. Hhh, don’t worry, I won’t tell Mom.” The look on Elly’s face shifted more towards concern, but eventually relented. Like she had done the numbers in her head and calculated that it indeed was only fair, despite her discomfort. Dess dripped more precum.
Elly gave a reluctant smile, sighed through her nose, and then began to lift her night gown up. “I guess… If it’s just to compare, then it’s okay! I am kinda curious…” She pulled down her frilly Cat Petterz patterned panties, giving Dess an unobscured view of her nether regions. Dess was a river at the sight, some drips of precum sliding down the underside of her shaft and onto Elly’s hand- which Elly suddenly seemed very conscious of the texture. Her fingers wiggled in slight discomfort from the warm, slightly viscous liquid touching her. This had the inadvertent effect of stimulating Dess’s dick even further.
Noelle jumped slightly as she was not prepared for Dess to lean over slightly and immediately begin grasping her little sheath and soft balls. Noelle tried to pull away, muttering some shy protests about how she's very sensitive down there. Dess kept Noelle in place with her firm hands on the little one’s wrist and privates. Elly moaned in an anguished manner, which only made Dess moan in response. She decided to offer her sister an excuse, “I mean, hhhey, fair's fair, y'know… Hhh… You get to touch mine, I get to touch yours.” It was the sort of logic that had already proven an appeal to Elly, but she still looked hesitant. Her hesitance did nothing to dissuade Dess any more though, as the older girl gently fondled her small bits. With all her trepidation removed, she slowly circled her thumb around the Elly’s tiny sheath before slipping it into the enclosure. Elly made a squeak, now herself shivering from the stimulation.
Dess poked around, feeling the head of her little sister’s penis slightly engorged by the sensation. Her eyes became glossy and she froze up like when Dess had previously kissed her. She was trying desperately to put on a brave face despite the conflict of feelings making her tear up, and Dess's heart swelled again with love for her. “Elly… Before you go to bedhhh,, there's something I wanna try with you. It'll feel really good, I promise.”
She didn’t wait for Noelle’s response again before picking her up by the legs, each arm locked underneath her knees in a way which forced Elly to straddle her in midair. Dess’s hardness was pressed onto the girl’s baby fatty tummy, making it sticky just after she had taken her shower. Noelle frantically clung her arms around her big sister’s neck, trying not to fall over as her sister carried her in the most vulnerable way she had been picked up. Her Cat Petterz panties fell from her ankle to her hooves, and then unceremoniously onto the floor as Dess walked with her. She was heavier than she had been in previous years, but being older and athletic, was able to still carry her as though she were light as a feather. Dess gently placed Elly down onto the ledge of the bathroom sink, still pressing harshly against her as the peachy fur and fat on Noelle’s tummy made it all the more comfortable and stimulating for her. The ledge of the sink elevated Elly’s pelvis to be nearly the same height as hers. Her left arm swung out from Elly’s leg, leaving it dangling off of the sink as the other was still forced to straddle her sister. Elly sheepishly began to say “D-Dess.. What are you doing? This is r-really weir-”
“Shhhh Elly. I got you. You’re safe. Just let me do this really quick. It’ll feel great, I promise. Relax.” The reassurance from her older sister actually did make Noelle tense less, just barely keeping the confused tears forming in her eyes from trickling down. She watched helplessly as Dess did something even more weird, taking the tip of her much larger privates and aligning it with the entrance of her sheath. Noelle’s own tip was just barely poking out, a sensation still extremely strange and unfamiliar to her. Wait, was Dess really about to do what it looked like-
“Eeeep!” Noelle squeaked uncontrollably from pain and strange stimulation as her sister’s head stretched the entrance to her sheath very slightly. Dess grunted in a very undignified manner, which unbeknownst to Elly was out of sheer lust for her little sister. When the pain subsided and Dess’s tip was comfortably in, the older girl used her hand to circle their heads around each other. Elly let out a moan as the feeling washed over her, her tears finally trickling down her snout. It felt so wrong, she intuitively knew that this was something they weren’t supposed to be doing together, more than just seeing each other nude or touching each other for learning purposes or kissing. Dess groaned even more, unable to hold back from gutturally expressing how good this felt. It felt wrong to her as well, of course, but that only mattered to her in this moment insofar as it added to the perverse arousal filling her body to the brim. She very delicately bucked her hips- barely a centimeter- not wanting to cause Noelle more pain from the stretching. It was just so she could get more contact from rubbing against what may as well be her sister’s clit. The two could barely stifle their noises, not wanting to get overheard. Of course, Dess knew that she was the only one who would get in trouble for this if they were caught. But she also gathered that even if Noelle figured that out, she wouldn’t want to get her big sister in trouble. As soon as Dess felt like she could rub their tips together without holding hers in place, she took her wet hand from herself and brought it to Noelle’s chin. As sweetly as she would if she were inspecting a flower, she tilted Elly’s head up and brought their mouths together once again. By this point Elly was squirming, but Dess knew she wouldn’t try to get away.
-
Things continued in this manner to both of them for what felt like ages, but in reality was likely just 5-10 minutes. Not wanting to take too long and rouse the suspicion of her mother, Dess finally pulled back. Her throbbing tip had left Elly’s tiny sheath, but the inside of it was still practically on fire and slick with the strange glossy liquid that her sister seemed to endlessly produce. She couldn’t say she fully hated the experience… Being physically close to Dess and receiving this much affection from her sister who was usually on edge was nice. And even after a while, something was enjoyable and addictive about the sensation of kissing and whatever it was that Dess was doing to her. But the sense of wrongness still pervaded her, making the aftermath feel particularly humiliating and alien to her. She was starting to second guess Kris’s hypothesis that ‘family doesn’t count’, or at least that they must count sometimes. Her mind briefly reviewed all the times that her mother or father had kissed her, and came to the distinct conclusion that none of them felt like that. None of them had also involved tongues or excessive bodily contact or anything to do with her private parts. In fact, it had always been impressed upon her from an early age that showing her privates to anyone, sometimes even family unless it was necessary, was wrong and weird- including by Dess just before she showered! Her sheath dripped the strange liquid that Dess had left, and her older sister panted while smiling down at her. Dess slung her other arm from out under her leg, leaving it to flop down the side of the sink. It felt sore from being held up that long. Noelle wondered about the discrepancy which she had just come upon. Why was it that Dess had done this, that she had kissed her like lovers do in movies? Why was it that she had touched their private parts together like she had, even though she gathered that the two of them doing so was forbidden? Why was it that she had ignored Noelle’s tears of confusion and discomfort, despite insisting that this was supposed to feel great?
The positive sides of the experience baffled her even more now. If it was so wrong and upsetting to her, why did some of it indeed feel good? Any way she tried to slice it, she couldn’t figure it out yet. She needed more time to think about it, and so for now she came to the conclusion that Dess really was trying to show her something cool. That she was trying to help her have fun and feel nice, and that she was trying to get closer to her sister. That the negative things she felt may have just been her being mistaken and inexperienced at whatever this was. It was far easier to believe that than come to the conclusion that Dess was trying to hurt her for some reason. Like always, she focused her mind on the positives. “Uhm, t-thank you for showing me that, D-Dess.. It was kinda fun and nice. I was just really confused and it felt weird,” she halfheartedly admitted.
“See?” Dess’s mind reasoned, “No harm done. It’s fine actually. It’s okay.” She evened her breath, getting ready to actually speak. “I had a lot of fun doing that with you, too. It’s just like kissing, right? Not so scary once you get into it. Now let’s rinse you off and get you to bed. We don’t want Mom to get mad at us, right? Feheh..”
Ignoring the fact that she was still afraid of kissing, Noelle was also still under the impression that getting caught meant they both got in equal trouble. It was something that she didn’t want for either of them. “R-right!” she chirped happily, a little thrilled that she had another secret to share with her sister. Even if her feelings around that secret were complicated, it still felt uniquely fun to share this only between the two of them. That was a normal sisterly thing to do, right?
-
December vigorously stroked herself in the shower, making a litany of unkempt noises. The water ran down her fur, coating her in warmth. She couldn’t believe what she had just done- and the fact that she would most likely get away with it. After she had cleaned Noelle up and sent her to bed, she nearly collapsed on the floor. The adrenaline in her body was still making her shake. She fell softly to her knees, then hunched over, bracing herself on the shower floor with her spare hand. The torrent of rain now ran perfectly down her snout as she stared into the drain below her. Her long hair formed a dripping vignette around her vision. Her thoughts were purely focused around her sweet little sister.
-
She turned the water off. “Quite the shower,” she thought to herself, still waiting for the self hating thoughts to return. But they were nowhere to be found. She was not, as she expected, brought by the clarity back to the galaxy where they incessantly orbited around her. In a way, she found it uncanny. She rationally knew that she had done something wrong, ten times worse than what she had done previously, and that she had hurt Elly- traumatized her, even! While her mind was compelled by this logic, it was not brought to a place familiar to her. Not a place she expected to be in. It was as though she had broken through some invisible border that defined her course of actions, and found herself somewhere where new things were possible again. She didn’t know if the thoughts would return to her again. Some part of her wanted them to… It was scary realizing what she was really capable of. But the liberation she currently felt, quiet though it was, made it seem as though she could do anything. Wasn’t that worth something? If she could hurt Elly and Kris as little as possible… Then maybe it was worth indulging herself. She would give it more thought. Her whole mental state felt like she was rediscovering the joy of breaking the rules for the first time again. “Maybe this could be good…”
She went to bed that night eager for the sleepover tomorrow, despite her previous reticence. A calm smile settled on her face as she drifted into unconsciousness.