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All couples fight. But it’s rare that the arguments between Alec and Magnus escalate this much.
They are both normally calm in their anger, in control of their emotions and the volume of their voice. But it’s been a long couple of weeks, and all the stress and lack of sleep has culminated into a situation where they are shouting at each other, words daggers trying to hit where it hurts the most. They don’t even remember what started it all, too busy to be the one with the final word to try to see the other person’s point of view.
They are shouting, standing a few feet away from each other in the loft kitchen where they were supposed to prepare dinner together. Alec is standing with his back straight, his arms crossed over his chest like he’s protecting his heart from all the blows Magnus is trying to deliver. He’s fuming, that much is clear from the look in his eyes.
Magnus is much more expressive, using his hands to accompany his words. He feels frustrated and eventually has to bring his hands back down, to turn them into fists at his sides. He can feel his magic reacting to his emotions, leaking into the air and making his hands twitch with a need for a release. He feels like there’s too much inside his tired body. Too much stress, too much anger, too much magic and too much hurt.
Alec notices the small movement, and with a tone a lot less attacking and a lot more careful, he speaks.
“Maybe you should calm down.”
But the words are like gasoline to a fire, causing Magnus to see red.
“Why? Are you scared?” Magnus asks, taunts, as the magic pulses in the air around them, warming his fingers like the frustration is burning in his mind.
The words Alec says next hit Magnus like a slap to the face, not because of their volume or force but because of their message. Alec’s expression is defiant, but his words are quiet.
“Do you want me to be?”
Magnus takes a step back at the words, his magic fading away as his heart drops to his stomach. Because no, he never wants Alec to fear him, to fear his magic. He never wants Alec to think of him as a threat, and the implication of the question fills him with shame.
“Never,” he says, the anger fading away and his eyes falling to the floor. How could he look at Alec, after what just happened?
Magnus believes that he would never actually hurt Alec with his magic, is certain that he would be able to calm himself before it went to that. His intention was never to scare Alec with his powers, it was merely another way to let out some steam.
But it doesn’t make it okay.
It’s quiet in the loft for a long while after that, the only sounds coming from their heavy breathing that’s slowly calming down.
It’s Magnus who breaks the silence, with words that he knows need to be said.
“I am so sorry,” he lifts his head up to look at Alec, hoping that the honest and regretful expression on his face shows Alec just how much he means the words, just how ashamed he is.
“It’s okay,” Alec replies, his hands falling to the sides as he looks at Magnus with an expression way more open than it has been in days.
“It is not.” Magnus argues, his voice weak in comparison to all the anger his words held only moments ago.
“I know,” Alec says, taking a step closer. “But I also know you didn’t mean it like that. We both said things we didn’t mean. I’m sorry too, for lashing out like that instead of listening you.”
“I don’t even remember what started this all,” Magnus admits.
“Me neither,” Alec says.
“And Magnus,” Alec continues, walking closer so that he’s a small step away from Magnus, reaching down to close both of his hands over the tense fists at Magnus’ sides, prying the fingers open until they’re holding hands palm to palm, fingers interlocked. “I’m not afraid. I’ve never been and I never will. I know you would never hurt me.”
“I swear I’m never using my powers against you,” Magnus says, his words full of promise and the look on his face determined as he squeezes Alec’s hands tightly. “I can make a blood oath to prove that to you.”
“That won’t be necessary,” Alec says immediately, a hint of amusement in his tone at Magnus’ dramatic suggestion. “I trust you, and your word is enough.”
Over his long life Magnus has had time to collect wealth - expensive artifacts and objects that were simply priceless. But the full trust his Alexander has handed him was without a doubt the thing Magnus held as the most valuable. It was something he was going to guard until the end, intent to never break it.
Suddenly holding hands doesn’t feel like enough, so Magnus lets go, only to bring his arms around Alec’s waist instead. He pulls Alec close and rests his chin on Alec’s shoulder, face turned into his neck. It feels like a heavy weight is lifted from his shoulders as he feels his embrace being returned.
They still have things to talk about, but it can wait for now.
