Chapter Text
Happy Hogan didn’t know how he went from being a bodyguard of a billionaire to a babysitter in the span of a few years. Actually, he knew exactly how it happened. Said billionaire was kidnapped by terrorists, became a superhero, found some other superheroes to create some kind of superhero team, had a quarrel with his super-friends, recruited a kid that was bitten by a radioactive spider to fight the super-friends – and got attached to the kid. Tony tend to do some weird things, but after working for him for over a decade Happy got kind of used to it.
That didn’t mean he liked it.
Earlier in the morning – if you could even call that ungodly hour morning – May Parker had called. And when May Parker calls, you answer. It’s one of The Rules that were established after the whole Vulture Incident and, more importantly, after she found out about her nephew’s secret identity. That hadn’t been pretty. Happy had been in the room when May had yelled at Tony for what seemed like hours. It’s been miraculous – he’s never seen his boss just sit quietly while someone screamed at him. Even Pepper would get some banter-that-was-basically-just-flirting in return. The kid had looked like he was this close to a mental breakdown and Happy didn’t blame him.
But eventually, after about a month and a bit of no Spider-Manning and The Rules, everything got back to – their kind of – normal. Peter was allowed to do his web shooting vigilante thing but only after school and doing his homework. As soon as his grades would slip, he had to stop. There was a curfew and he had to call in after patrolling; which wasn’t really a new rule as he’d already done that before. Happy had several long voice mails to proof it. Peter spend every other weekend with Tony to upgrade the suit, work on his web fluids, get some basic material arts training, and whatever else a young superhero in training need to learn. Lately, they spend more time in the lab tinkering, playing stupid video games or watching movies. Happy isn’t really sure how that’s part of the superhero training but he hasn’t seen Tony that relaxed in a long time, so he keeps his mouth shut.
One of the most important rules was to always, always, pick up the phone if one of the Parkers is calling. Which was the reason Happy was currently in Queens, about to climb up seven flights of stairs – because of course the lift was out of order – to check up on the kid. His aunt had turned to him because Peter hadn’t picked up his phone when she tried call him – she preferred to call Happy instead of Tony because Tony was the complete opposite of subtle and the last thing they need right now were headlines about him visiting some kid in Queens. May was working some insane shifts at the hospital which was why Peter was on his own in the mornings as well as the evenings and better parts of the night. Tony had offered to let him stay at the Tower, but May didn’t trust him to stick to the curfews without Pepper around to make sure both teenager and billionaire would get the proper amount of sleep. So, the kid was mostly alone and his aunt would call in to make sure that he was awake and getting ready for school. It was a system that had worked before and seemed to work now – until this morning.
Peter hadn’t picked up when she called in to make sure he was getting ready for school. Not the first time, not the second time, and not the third time. He said he hadn’t been injured on patrol, May’s words rang in Happy’s ears, but you know how he is. Please just make sure he is okay. It was a reasonable request. The kid had a history of hiding injuries and down playing everything.
When Happy reached the seventh floor, his knees hurt and he was more out of breath than he would like to be. Getting old sucked. He was already mildly irritated as he reached the Parker Apartment but before he could even raise his hand to knock the door swung open and revealed a shocked Peter Parker, hair sticking out in every direction, tooth brush hanging out of one corner of his mouth, clad in a familiar New York tourist shirt and Hello Kitty pajama pants. “My phone is dead,” he said, not bothering to take the tooth brush out of his mouth. “My alarm didn’t go off and I didn’t get May’s calls and I just woke up because I heard your car outside and –“
“Hey, kid, try to get some breath between all of those words, alright?” Happy interrupted him, his face already pulled in an annoyed grimace. He raced down to Queens for this? A teenager who overslept? However, he couldn’t help but let his eyes scan the boy for any sign of injuries. There were none that he could see and Peter didn’t seem to be in any sort of pain. The tension that had settled in his shoulders since he got May’s call eased away. “How did your phone even die? I thought phones are more important than air for the kids these days.”
“I don’t know!” Peter said, ranking a hand through his hair – which did not help him to look more awake – and finally took the brush out of his mouth. “I thought I plugged it in but maybe I was too tired or something is wrong with my charger or – Happy, you have to help me! I can’t be late again, and I won’t make it in time if I take the subway!”
“I’m just here to make sure you’re alive, not to drive you around.”
Peter used his Puppy Eyes. They always worked on Tony. “Please!”
Happy wasn’t Tony. “It’s your mess, so you find a solution for it.”
He could see Peter deflate in front of him before he picked himself up again. This kid was almost stupidly optimistic. “Well, I guess I could always use my web shooters. It would only take about ten minutes.”
Happy suddenly remembered why this kid needed supervision. “And have your identity revealed? Your aunt would bury me alive if that happens.” He made a shoo-shoo gesture with one hand, trying to get the kid back into the apartment. “Brush your teeth, brush your hair, put on one of your nerdy shirts and get your stuff for school. We’re leaving in five minutes.”
“Happy, you’re the best!” The smile Peter gave him was blinding, even though there was foamed toothpaste in one corner of his mouth. With a sigh, Happy stepped into the small hall and closed the door behind him, listening to Peter’s hurried footsteps. As soon as he heard running water, he pulled out his phone to shoot May a quick text, assuring her that her nephew was in fact not dead and just a typical teenager.
While he waited, Happy looked around in the living room. It wasn’t big, actually rather small, with a couple of mismatched furniture, a TV, and a book shelf that was overflowing. It was nothing like any of Tony’s spacious living rooms but it had a certain feeling of home. It felt like people really lived here, like memories were created in this spot. Or maybe it was just the fact that Tony got yelled at by May here.
“Don’t forget to grab some food!” Happy yelled as he heard the bathroom door open again. “If you’re passing out because you forgot to eat, I’m the one who’s to pick you up. So, don’t forget to eat.” Peter yelled back an affirmation and continued to jump from one part of the apartment to the other. Meanwhile, Happy’s attention had turned to the pictures that covered one of the walls. There were a lot of them, but he had never had a good look at them before. A ton load of Peter – everything from baby pictures to his current age. He spotted May and a man that he assumed was Ben as well.
However, he paused at a particular photo. It was a wedding photo, bride and groom in the middle. Ben and May were there, too, as well as a toddler in a suit. Happy took a wild guess that it was Peter because he would recognize those curls anywhere. The bridal couple had to be Mary and Richard Parker, Peter’s parents. But that wasn’t what caught his attention. It was a swirling feeling in his deepest pit of his stomach that he knew the face of the bride. Happy Hogan never forgets a face. That was something he was quite proud of. But he just couldn’t quite remember where he’d seen the face before. When had he met Mary Parker? The swirling feeling intensified.
“I’m ready to go!” Peter declared as he came to a stop next to the bodyguard. He looked more presentable than five minutes ago, however, his hair was still doing whatever it wanted.
“Are those your parents?” Happy asked, not moving an inch, eyes still glued to Mary Parker’s face. Of course, he already knew the answer to that question even before he saw Peter nod yes. “They weren’t married before you were born?”
“No, Mom got pregnant and she, apparently, didn’t want to look like a whale dressed in white on all the pictures, so they waited.” Peter pointed to a different picture on the right. “That’s my favorite. It’s the last one we took before they died.” In the photograph were a six-year-old Peter with two missing teeth and his parents who all smiled brightly into the camera.
Happy Hogan never forgets a face.
And suddenly he remembered where he knew that face from. The blood in his veins turned cold and for a second his lungs forgot they need oxygen to function. He counted back the years, hoping it would calm his racing heart. Hoping it wouldn’t match.
But it did.
“Happy?” There was a hand on his shoulder. “Are you okay?”
Happy finally tore away his gaze from the picture and looked at the kid. This stupidly brave kid that couldn’t stop throwing himself in danger to protect everyone else. That was so terrifyingly smart, probably smarter than Tony himself. That fought against criminals with high-tech weapons while he himself was in a painted onesie and some tech he built out of scraps. That experienced more tragedy in his few years than other people did in their whole life and was still able to see the good in everyone.
Happy took a deep breath in a hopefully subtle way – you kind of forget what subtle means when you’re hanging out with Tony Stark – and turned to the door. “Yeah, of course. Now, c’mon, I thought you want to be on time.”
If Peter noticed something was off, he didn’t show it. Instead he started talking a mile a minute like his usual self, telling him all about his last patrol – which was more than unnecessary because Happy already had that report – and the new Lego set he wants to build with his friend. Happy didn’t interrupt him or gave any indication that he was listening; which didn’t stop Peter from continuing. However, there were a few times when Happy almost asked the kid about his parents. It was a burning urge that was tickling under his fingernails but he kept his mouth shut.
As soon as he pulled up in front of the school, Peter jumped out of the car with a Thanks Happy! Bye Happy! and left him alone. Alone at last, Happy sighed and let his forehead slump against the stirring wheel. He could be wrong. He hoped he was wrong because the kid didn’t need any more chaos in his life.
But there was one thing Happy was absolutely certain about: he had to talk to Tony.
“Boss, Mr Hogan wishes to speak with you,” FRIDAY announced as she turned down the music.
Tony didn’t even look up from his blue prints and took another sip of his coffee. “Typical. The moment I have actual important work to do, nobody knows what the words Do Not Disturb mean.” He put down his mug and sniffed once. One of their newest products that was due to launch in a few days was malfunctioning and nobody could figure out what was causing it. Tony finally agreed to take a look at it. Pepper threatened to cut down his Peter Time if he hadn’t found a solution by the end of the day, so he was quite motivated. “Tell him I’ll call him later.”
“He insists that it is an urgent matter.”
“Is somebody dying?”
There was a pause, presumable because FRIDAY was delivering the question. “No, Boss. Nobody is dying.”
“Then it’s not urgent.”
“He is already outside the workshop.”
With a sigh Tony spun around in his chair. On the other side of the giant glass walls was indeed Happy, not looking very happy. “Go away!” he screamed, knowing that FRIDAY would relay the message. Happy said something but no sound came throw the thick glass. Oh, and because Tony soundproofed about every room in the Tower. “What? Oh, I can’t hear you. I just assume that you’re agreeing with me. Goodbye!” He waved and turned back to the blueprints, determined to solve this quickly just so he was done with it. There were so many more fun things to do. For example, the little upgrade he had planned for Peter’s suit.
“Boss,” FRIDAY chimed in again, “he says it concerns Mr Parker.”
Tony stilled immediately. For a second, raw panic overpowered him. Did something happen? He didn’t get any reports about injuries or something alike from Peter’s AI yesterday. However, as soon as Peter took off the suit Tony had little to no way of knowing if something happened to him. He was still perfecting the watch that would fix that problem. Had he been too slow? “Let him in, FRIDAY.”
As soon as he heard the soft woosh of the opening doors the genius turned around again. But before he could even form his next words, Happy was already talking. “The kid’s fine. Don’t panic.”
His blood pressure returned to a normal rate and air was flowing back into his lungs. “And you couldn’t have led with that?”
“You wouldn’t have opened the door if I did.”
Well … that was true. Accepting that Happy wasn’t leaving any time soon and arguing that he deserved a short break from all the problem-solving Tony leant back into his chair. And that was the only reason. Definitely not because he liked talking about Peter. It was the first reason. For sure. “So? What’s up?”
Happy didn’t answer right away. Instead, he sat down on a chair, stood up again, took a couple of steps in one direction, then in the other, and put his hands in his pocket just to take them out a few seconds later. He was fidgeting which was quite unlike him. Tony tried to ignore the bad feeling inside his chest that threatened to overwhelm him and just waited. It took his ex-bodyguard a couple of moments before he got his thoughts in order. “May called me this morning to check up on Peter because he didn’t answer his phone.”
And there was that special kind of worry again that always grabs a hold of Tony whenever Peter’s involved. “Is he okay?” he couldn’t help but ask again. There was a strange urge in him to send the kid a text, just to make sure everything was fine.
“Yes, I told you, he’s fine. His phone just ran out of battery.”
“How does that even happen? Teenagers always charge their phones.”
“It doesn’t matter why; the point is his alarm didn’t go off and he didn’t get any calls from his aunt. When I got there he just woke up and I drove him to school.”
Tony knitted his eyebrows together in confusion. “So, what’s all this about? Do you want me to build him a phone that never runs out of battery? Buy him an old-fashioned alarm clock?” Another thought crossed his mind and his mood darkened immediately. “Did this Flash kid gave him any trouble? I swear if Peter would just let me talk to him –“
“It’s not about the bully or his alarm or any of that, okay?” Happy snapped. Tony blinked. It’d had been quite some time since Happy lost his patience like that. Whatever happened must’ve really left an impact on him. The man took a deep breath to calm himself down, stuffing his hand back into his pockets and keeping them there. “I took a look at the pictures in their living room while I waited.”
Tony nodded. Of course, he knew the pictures. He’d teased Peter endless about the one where he had chocolate ice cream all over his face. Happy hesitated to continue. “What about those pictures, Happy?”
“You know I never forget a face,” he said. Tony nodded again, after all Happy had been the one to recognize Aldrich Killian. “I recognized one of the faces. And, no, it wasn’t Peter or May.” Happy took another deep breath and the look in his eyes turned almost … soft? Sympathetic? Definitely nothing Tony liked. “What do you know about Peter’s parents?”
“Richard and Mary Parker,” Tony answered instantly, reciting all the information FRIDAY duck up on them all those months ago. “They’re both absolutely brilliant scientists, specializing in bio- and genetic-engineering. Worked for Oscorp but quit shortly before their tragic plane crash that left Peter with Richard’s older brother Ben and his wife May. Why?”
“Because it was Mary Parker’s face that I recognized,” Happy finally confessed and looked at Tony like he expected him to get it.
He didn’t. Instead he just blinked a couple of times. “Where and when did you meet Mary Parker?”
“Where and when did we meet Mary Parker,” Happy corrected him. It still made no sense to Tony. “It took me a minute, but I remembered.”
“Remembered what?”
“The conference in Detroit. About sixteen and a half years ago, give or take.” It seemed like Tony could do was to blink. His brain had stopped working, refusing to process the words and their meaning. Happy pressed his lips into a very thin line. “You talked with her and … spend the night in a hotel room. Together.”
“Are you … do you …,” Tony tried to take a deep breath but it was like there was not enough air in the room. He felt claustrophobic and the only thing stopping him from having a panic attack was the hope that he misinterpreted Happy’s words. He had to. Because he couldn’t possible mean –
“I think there is a chance you might be Peter’s biological father,” Happy said and took the last bit of hope away.
“No.” The word was out of Tony’s mouth before he could think about it. “No. Not possible. I would remember.”
“Would you?”
No, he wouldn’t. He barely remembered the conference but knowing himself and his past-playboy ways he could imagine what went down. But if it was true …
“FRIDAY, try to get a hold of the guest list from that conference, please,” he ordered, his mind racing to prove Happy wrong, to prove that it just couldn’t be true. “Check for a Mary Parker.”
“Mary Fitzpatrick,” Happy corrected again. “Her and Richard married after Peter was born.”
“Right away.” A tense silence spread through out the workshop while the AI fulfilled her tasked. Tony was painfully aware of the fact that Happy was watching him like a hawk. His hands began to tremble and he longed for a drink. Or a whole bottle. But before he could even move a finger FRIDAY spoke up again. “There is a match, Boss.” Immediately, there was a picture of a young, beautiful woman on the holographic screen.
There was a burning stone in Tony’s stomach. “And that Mary Fitzpatrick is the future Mary Parker?”
“Yes, Boss.” A second picture popped up. Undeniably the same woman, only a bit older. All the genius could do was slump back into his chair, raking his hand through his hair, gripping a few strands tightly between his fingers. It couldn’t be. It couldn’t be true. It just couldn’t. Because if it was true, if he truly was Peter’s father it only meant he screwed up even more.
Happy said something but he couldn’t make out the words. His thoughts raced through his head, trying to remember that night – but nothing came up. He must have been quite drunk. Which wasn’t really a surprise.
Suddenly, there was a hand on his shoulder, shaking him. “Tony, you need to calm down.”
“How can I calm down?” he exploded, jumping out of his chair, pacing around the room. DUM-E beeped somewhat concerned in a corner of the room, trying to wheel closer but Happy gave him a signal to stand down. “How can I be calm when there’s a chance that – … when I could be – … I can’t be calm!”
It couldn’t be true. There was no possible way that it was true. Because a Stark could only create weapons and destroy. They couldn’t create things like Peter – so innocent and good and brave and sweet and intelligent and kind-hearted. He was everything Tony wasn’t, so how could he have made him? Yes, sure, the kid had grown on him to the point where the billionaire would eagerly wait for him to stop by to work with him in the lab or tinker around or help him with his school work or watch a movie with him or just talk to him. Unlike Happy, he always smiled when he got multiple text from Peter – because the kid wasn’t afraid of double texting – no matter the memes, GIFs or vine references. There was an unfamiliar, fierce protectiveness in him whenever Peter was in the slightest chance of danger. And, okay, maybe he had imagined what it would be like if he was actually his son but that was just that – imaginary. A fantasy to distract him from the chaos that was his life. Nothing more.
But if … if it was true? If it was true, he utterly failed Peter. Starting with not knowing that he even had a child to having him go through so many traumatic events – losing his parents, the spider bite, losing his uncle – without being there to comfort him and ending with taking him to Germany to fight superheroes. Taking his suit. Letting him fight the Vulture alone. Having a building collapse on him and being completely alone. Those things had been painful when Peter had just been his mentee, but now … now they were unbearable. Tony wasn’t a father. A father wouldn’t let anything like that happen to their kid.
“Tony!” He was spun around and looked right into the face of a concerned Happy Hogan. “You need to breath!”
I am was what he wanted to say but there wasn’t any air in his lungs to get the words out. Gulping, he took a few short breaths. His whole body trembled and he gripped Happy’s arms to ground himself on something.
“You okay?” Tony tried nodding but his body wouldn’t do what he wanted. Happy guided him to the closest chair and sat him down. “You need to calm down, okay? There’s no need to panic.”
“No need to panic?” Tony repeated and sounded so much weaker than he liked.
“No, not one bit,” Happy continued before Tony could, “because it’s just a theory. It could be a coincidence. We have no concrete proof. You hear me? It’s just a theory.”
Those words seeped through his thick skull and calmed his nerves enough for him to form a coherent thought. Happy was right. It was a theory. There was no proof that Peter really was his son. Everything could be a stupid scare. And a reminder that he should drink himself into oblivion ever again.
He needed that proof.
“FRIDAY, do we have anything in the lab to perform something like a paternity test?”
“Tony -,“ Happy tried but Tony was already on his feet again and pacing around the workshop.
“There should be the proper equipment for such a test in Dr Banner’s lab, Boss,” FRIDAY answered.
He turned towards the door, his mind already in the lab two stories below. He was perfectly aware that he didn’t need to go down there, after all FRIDAY could just tell him the results. However, it gave him something to do, gave him a reason to move and he just couldn’t stand still right now. Happy was hot on his heels. “Do we still have samples of Peter’s DNA on file?”
“Yes, Boss.”
“I take it we have mine as well. Will they be enough for the test to work?”
“They should be sufficient.”
“Excellent. Run the test.”
“Tony, just wait a second, will you?” Happy almost yelled as they reached the elevator. The only reason Tony did stop was because the doors weren’t open yet. “Don’t rush into it.”
“I’m not.” The doors finally opened and he stepped inside, immediately pushing the button for what once was Bruce’s lab. Happy followed him.
“You’re running a DNA test.”
“Well, what else am I supposed to do?!” His voiced boomed in the small space. “I need to know if it’s true or not and then I can act accordingly to it. Because if it turns out that I’m not … that we don’t share the same DNA then all this worrying and talking and whatnot is completely superfluous. Just a stupid conversation that kept me from working.”
“And how do you act accordingly if it turns out you are his father?” Something burned inside Tony’s chest but he refused to answer that question. There was no point in thinking about what ifs.
The doors opened once again and Tony didn’t waste a second stepping out of them and into the abandoned lab. He hadn’t been in here ever since Bruce went MIA but he couldn’t dwell on that. Maybe after he finds out that he and Peter weren’t related. His eyes locked onto the only flickering screen that seemed to illuminate the entire room. For a second uncertainty and something like fear – though he couldn’t say fear of what exactly – kept Tony from taking another step.
Did he really want to find out? Couldn’t he just continue without knowing? He seemed to do alright as a mentor, why should he change that? Afterall, he would be a terrible father.
“The test is completed, Boss,” FRIDAY announced. For an AI, she sounded almost sensitive.
Blood rushed in Tony’s ears. He could feel Happy’s gaze on him again. Without really knowing how, he moved over to the still flickering screen, holding his breath. Tony wasn’t a doctor. He preferred tinkering with robots instead of humans. But he knew enough about biology to understand the results.
It was a match.