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Jotaro Kujo had never known what he wanted to do when he was older. All his life he had never been quite sure, as he certainly didn't look towards his father, with his music and constant absense, as an example. He was never entirely invested in school either, explaining his 'delinquency'.
But, before everything that happened, before Stands and Egypt and Dio, if you had to press him, and caught him in a mood where he wasn't likely to tell you to fuck off, he would say that for a career, he would probably want something to do with the ocean.
As Jotaro Kujo grew older, he would pursue a career in marine biology. If Jotaro Kujo could grow older, he would have pursued a career in marine biology.
Those futures are nothing but ash in his mouth at this point, because Jotaro Kujo knows that he isn't getting any older.
(He can't quite bring himself to care, anymore.)
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When Jotaro and Kakyoin kissed for the first time, it was a short while into their journey to Cairo, after they had freed Polnareff from his control under DIO. He wasn't the one to initiate it, that had been entirely Kakyoin.
It had been just the two of them, all alone in the small hotel room, rented with funds the Speedwagon Foundation had so graciously been providing throughout the journey. The tension between the two of them, Jotaro had thought at the time, could be practically cut with a knife.
And then Kakyoin had grabbed the back of his head kissed him, and he found that he didn't really give a damn about whatever tension there was.
As they pulled away, Jotaro faintly noted that Kakyoin's lips tasted of cherries, and found himself completely unsurprised. Kakyoin had smiled, looking far prettier than he had any right to be, and Jotaro had never gone as red as he had in that moment.
He had tried to stutter out words in something resembling coherency, and Kakyoin looked both surprised and amused about how easy his typical demeanor had flown out the window with that one simple action. Jotaro eventually strung together a sentence, and the general message of it was "What does that make us now, then?"
The redhead had grinned up at him, eyes glinting, and told him they didn't have to be anything just yet, not until he was ready.
Jotaro had looked down at Kakyoin, face flushed, heart beating faster than he would have liked, saw the beautiful smile he was holding on his lips, and found that his breath had been taken away. It would be the first, and only time he fell in love.
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When Jotaro and Kakyoin kissed for the last time, it was on the streets of Cairo, in the middle of the night, and both teens were running for their lives, because they could do nothing else.
Jotaro was clutching desperately at his right arm, or rather, where his right arm used to be, with both his left hand and Star Platinum, trying to stop the blood from flowing, when Kakyoin collapses against an alley wall.
Jotaro halts in his tracks immediately, looking over towards the other boy, and his panic spikes when he sees Kakyoin's head hanging low, both arms pressed against his midsection where a large, large bloodstain is origination from.
"Shit," he hisses through his teeth, both at the level of noise they're making and the fact DIO is sure to catch up with them at any second, but the night is quiet and there's no sign of the insane, teleporting vampire. Something in Jotaro's stomach drops like a rock, and he wonders whether they've actually lost him, or if he's treating them like a cat playing with it's food. His blood drip-drip-drips down to the floor of the alleyway, echoing loudly in the silent night.
Kakyoin coughs, and it's a wet thing that comes up with a fair amount of blood, and Jotaro is on his knees by his side immediately.
The redhead's eyes are screwed up in pain, and it makes the slash-like scars crossing them bunch up awkwardly, raised tissue becoming more prominent.
"Kakyoin-" Jotaro says, but one of Kakyoin's arms, in an action contrary to his apparent physical state, lashes up whip-quick to his mouth, silencing him.
"No." Kakyoin grinds out, and it's hard to make out because he sounds like he swallowed an abundance of sand from the desert. "Keep going."
"Absolutely not." Jotaro replies without even thinking, because he can not keep going without Kakyoin, not when he's the only one of them left, not when DIO is so close, not when he loves him.
Star Platinum appears by his side, looking so much more worse-for-wear than he had earlier in the day, 'But there's a reason for that,' Jotaro thinks to himself as he remembers DIO's constant attacks, sharp nails raking across his body interspersed with hits that had to have come from his stand, in and out, damaging Star without even appearing in-range. Star's arm is also missing, from the elbow downwards, and Jotaro winces at the sight.
"I can carry you." He tells Kakyoin, and firmly ignores the fact that he really can't.
"No," Kakyoin repeats, and he sounds like he's a single breath away from death and Jotaro pointedly does not think about how that might actually be the case. "Jotaro, go-" he coughs, "you need to beat Dio. Please." There's something in his voice that reminds Jotaro of the slight note of fear he always held in his voice when he talked about what it was like to be under DIO's control, but a thousand times stronger, and Jotaro hesistates, face blank.
Kakyoin looks him in the eyes, desperate. Jotaro grabs his face, careful not to jostle either of their injuries, and presses a light kiss to his lips. Kakyoin smiles even as his eyelids droop and there's an overpowering taste of copper and ash in Jotaro's mouth.
He runs.
He doesn't look back when he hears DIO laugh, no matter how much he wants to. He can't look back when he's cut down.
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(It was some time between the first time they kissed, and the last time they kissed, when Kakyoin opened up to Jotaro about the anxieties he was feeling, concerning the trip.
He tells him of what it was like when he first met Dio, of the night in Cairo and the sickly sweet scent of blood and roses, bodies slowly decomposing, faces frozen in abject terror.
He tells him of how he never, ever wants to be under that type of control again, how he had smiled as the flesh bud stabbed into his forehead.
Jotaro sits by his side and listens to him, knowing that this is something Kakyoin just has to rant about, doing what he does best and remaining silent, a constant comforting presence by his (Friend? Boyfriend? Something else?)'s side.
Jotaro listens to Kakyoin as he tells him all about the dissasociative feeling Dio's control brought, and he realises that he has no clue what that would even feel like.)
He thinks he knows, now.
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As Jotaro gazes up at the waning moon hung high in the sky like a picture-perfect decoration, arms straight by his sides, he realises that he now knows what Kakyoin meant, when he spoke about the control.
It's something subtle, something that changes the way he feels his emotions, the way he thinks, but only slightly. He's still mostly himself.
"And," speaks a small, small corner of his mind that Jotaro literally cannot pay any heed to, on account of the bud poking into his brain, "That just makes it so much worse."
There's a noise behind him, and he doesn't turn around, eyes still locked onto the shining beacon of light in the sky, something deep inside of him hoping that it'd suddenly be reflecting enough sunlight to kill him in his new state.
DIO wraps his arms around his shoulders, one hand poised slightly beside his cheek, and Jotaro's body tilts his head into the touch, the teen-turned-vampire feeling as if his spirit is disconnected from his body, calm in a situation he knows he shouldn't be, although he can't quite remember why.
Inside, he screams, as the hopes and dreams of a future with promise, a future with Kakyoin, fizzle out.
The broken hopes taste like ash in his mouth.