Chapter Text
Of course, nothing went wrong when Piper and Dick were supposed to meet up with the Kents, who knew all about their double lives and would have perfectly understood having dinner pushed back because of superheroics. Hell, since they were nice, sympathetic people seemingly without a judgmental bone in their body, they probably would have been cool with an excuse as mundane as a flat tire.
No, the superheroics had to crop up when they were supposed to meet with Rachel, who was always on the lookout for a reason to be displeased, especially when it came to her gay son's love life (she claimed she'd accepted his homosexuality and wasn't secretly hoping he'd change his mind, yet she still let him know about every eligible, age appropriate daughter her friends had).
The original plan was for Dick to come by Saturday night after his patrol in Bludhaven. They'd spend the night together, head out to Chez Ennui in the morning, and then after the awkward obligatory meal swing by Wally's house to hang with him and Linda and wait for superhero stuff to come up (because three costumes in one room meant superhero stuff would inevitably come up). Really, the plan sounded far too idealistic to work out but Piper was trying to be more optimistic. Dick said he didn't mind his cynicism, but Piper also suspected that was a bit of a fib.
Saturday evening, when Piper got home from his shift at the soup kitchen he went upstairs to shower, put on clothes he found almost flattering, limited himself to five minutes staring at his reflection and wishing his nose wasn't such an odd shape, and then sat down in the living room to wait for his boyfriend.
Four hours later he was asleep on the couch, his nice pants had chocolate ice cream stains on them, and a carton of half eaten ice cream had melted a new ring onto his coffee table.
He still hadn't heard from Dick the next morning, and they were supposed to be meeting up with Rachel at eleven. With a resigned sigh, Piper cleaned up the living room, got changed into chocolate-stain free clothes, and started mentally preparing himself for the prospect of spending nearly an hour in his mother's company without anyone else to buffer. He thought about brushing out his hair, which had gotten rumpled in his sleep, but ultimately decided against it. Rachel hated his ponytail so it didn't much matter if it was messy or sleek.
For the hell of it, he tried giving Dick a call but of course it went straight to voicemail.
“Darling, good morning. Come here, dearest.” Rachel kissed both of Piper's cheeks, a charming smile on her face that had fooled many an unsuspecting acquaintance into thinking her a doting mother. Piper shakily returned the smile and sat down across from her at the table. “So where's this new beau of yours?”
“Stuck in Gotham, I'm afraid. Family business came up.”
“Oh, that's right. You said you were dating the Grayson boy now?” To his great surprise his mother actually looked happy. “The next time you do manage to get him to yourself, do tell him that your father and I send our best to Bruce, and we'd love to chat with him some time about a possible collaboration. You know he owns the Daily Planet now? If he's interested in publishing, he really ought to renew his business relationship with Osgood. We do have something of a history with the Waynes.”
Huh. Piper felt a bit foolish for not anticipating this. Rachel couldn't care less that he was dating someone he was happy with. Dick had connections to their society circles. He was a networking opportunity. That's why she cared.
Well at least her desire for said networking was keeping her from calling attention to being stood up.
They placed their orders and the next fifteen minutes passed in slightly awkward small talk, the two of them dancing around all the subjects they knew were going to set the other off.
“Darling, I'm so sorry your, er, partner couldn't make it out today. Do you think he'll be able to free up some time next month for your sister's birthday party? Jerrie's determined to meet him. Of course, I'd hoped for a chance to talk to him myself first, as I'm sure Jerrie will secure all his attention to herself. She has that way about her, you know. That charming innocence.”
Piper smiled, thinking of his baby sister. “Dick's going to love her. I can't make any promises without talking to him first. You know, it's already a long distance relationship and he's always got so many commitments, but I'll pitch it to him. And I'll definitely be at Jerrie's party. Thanks for inviting me.”
Rachel's smile almost slipped. “Oh come now, Hartley. This can't be the first I've mentioned it to you.”
“Actually this really is. I'd assumed you guys were doing something for the sweet sixteen but somehow it always seems to have slipped your mind when you've been talking to me. I guess it's a good thing I've got a boyfriend that's more interesting than me now.”
“Really, Hartley. You always take everything in the most unflattering way possible.”
Piper quirked an eyebrow. “And how should I take my parents forgetting to invite me to my baby sister's birthday party until I landed a boyfriend they wanted to meet? Seriously, spin that in a flattering light for me. I'll wait.”
Rachel narrowed her eyes. “Perhaps we got into the habit of excluding you during those long years you spent doing your absolute best to humiliate your family and ruin every social engagement you were involved in, including your sister's parties. Or do you not remember Jerrie hiding in the pantry sobbing her eyes out on her fifth birthday when you lost your temper and punched the magician we hired?”
“The bigot you hired did a super fey mean imitation of me to give the parents a cheap laugh at my expense. I just showed him that some of us sissies could hit.”
“Hartley, no one knew you were gay then. You were just being too sensitive, like you always are. Look, this party is for Jerrie. I don't want you spoiling it by making it about yourself and this air of victimhood you're always carrying with you. We're family and we love you, darling. I'd love to be able to send you as many invitations as I can think of without this awful anxiety that you'll act out. You know how Jerrie is. She doesn't understand half of what you're always ranting and raving about. All she sees is that her brother is upset and she ends up thinking she did something wrong. She shouldn't have to worry about your tantrums on her special day.”
Piper balled his shaking hands into fists. The words had struck home, but damned if he would let Rachel see that. “Right. Because god forbid you just not invite horrible people to your inane parties to begin with. But I know me feeling safe and welcome has never been especially important to you and Dad.”
“You're twisting my words.”
“You're guilt tripping me for standing up for myself. Just say it, Mom. You're still ashamed of me and you always have been.”
“Hartley, that's not...can we talk about this later?” Rachel shot a quick look around the restaurant, reassuring herself that no one was paying attention to them.
Piper balled his napkin up and tossed it on his plate. He stood up, took out his wallet, and tossed some bills onto the table. “I'm not doing this.”
“Perhaps that's for the best. After you've cooled down please give me a call, darling. We should talk about this.”
He bit back a retort he'd probably regret later and then stormed out of the restaurant.
Dick stumbled into Wally's living room later that night. Piper was in comfortable, scrubby clothes playing video games with Linda. He'd spent the whole day trying not to be mad at Dick, but considering how the solo brunch date with his mother had gone, he was hoping for one hell of a story.
The fact that Dick was shaky on his feet and almost as pale as Piper when his skin tone was normally tan and healthy was already buying back some sympathy points. Linda shut off the TV and Piper jumped to his feet. “What happened?”
“Sorry about the...about being off the grid. Tim got in over his head on a case and called me in for support. Poison Ivy hit me with something. I think it's out of my system now but I'm still not feeling my best. I'd have called, I swear, but I was in a coma. I only woke up an hour ago.”
Piper stared at him incredulously while Linda awkwardly collected up the controllers, scrupulously avoiding eye contact with either member of the couple. Wally helped Dick sit down on the sofa and handed him a few throw pillows.
“Why are you here?” Piper was very proud of himself for keeping his voice low and even.
“Um...what?”
“Dick, why are you here? You were poisoned into a coma, you could have died. You should be home resting, not...fuck, but that's a perfectly valid reason to blow off a date, okay?”
“Is it?” Dick blinked a few times and then rubbed his forehead. “Sorry, head's spinning a little. Look, I know the costume infringes on the civilian life a lot. I seriously do try my best, and I'm sorry I wasn't there to meet your mother. I know you weren't looking forward to it and I shouldn't have left you alone for that-”
“Well you made up for it by not actually dying.”
Wally rubbed Dick's shoulder. “He's not mad at you, dude. He wasn't even mad before you got here.”
“I don't know about that,” Linda said. “Hartley was definitely simmering. If the excuse had been less serious than near fatal encounter with a dangerous supervillain we'd be having a very different conversation.”
“We would, but as is...you should be home resting.” Piper frowned, upset with Dick for taking unnecessary risks on top of the ones that already came with superheroics and upset with himself for how personally he'd taken the lack of phone calls while being blown off. Hell, he hadn't even been blown off, really. It was a coma. That was perfectly valid. Why on earth did Dick feel guilty about it?
“I'm already here though. Can we rest together at your place?” Dick threw him the puppy eyes, which he really should have looked into weaponizing somehow. Piper probably wouldn't have needed the help of modified flutes to hypnotize people if his baby-blues could do that. “I've had a miserable day. I'd like to cuddle with my boyfriend.”
Linda smiled. “I was losing at Mariokart anyway. You can have him.”
“Thanks.” Dick's gaze didn't leave Piper. “You're really not mad at me?”
“Why would I be mad at you?”
Wally looked awfully smug about something. “Yeah, Dick. Only a real asshole would get mad at you for missing a date because you got your ass handed to you.”
“Or a sixteen year old going through some serious shit.”
“Hey, the two of us were both sixteen year olds going through serious shit, and yet came out capable of empathy.”
“Slow down there, red,” Linda said. “You're easily the most obtuse person in the room so I'm not sure you should be bragging about this supposed empathy.”
“I had to bail on Roy an awful lot when he really needed me,” Dick said, frowning. “He had plenty of empathy the first ten or twelve times it happened. You saw him blow up when it was literally like the twentieth time I left him hanging.” He sighed and rubbed at his eyes. “I really wish we weren't still snarking at each other about a relationship that ended when I was seventeen. Ostensibly you're friends with Roy.”
“Ostensibly. It's mostly because so many of my friends have had the misfortune of falling in love with him. Fucking mystery to me, how he's managed that. You and Donna are so smart. You should know so much better.”
“Look, can we not drag out my relationship drama in front of Piper, please? Especially since I'm feeling like utter crap?”
“Yeah, this is about as crap as I've seen you look,” Linda pointed out. “You almost look like a normal human being.”
Dick put on a cheery, over the top smile in an attempt at snarking back at her, but it barely lasted a second. He did look really wiped. Piper helped him up. “Come on. I might not have been poisoned, but my day wasn't exactly stellar. Cuddling sounds good.”
“See you guys later,” Wally called. Piper could hear him and Linda discussing his relationship while he helped Dick into his car. He did his best to tune them out, but it was a bit of a challenge.
Apparently Wally had decided they were frickin' adorable together. It was a little patronizing, but not actually a bad thing. Dick did bring some of his warm and fuzzy tendencies to the surface. Maybe Wally was actually being observant for once.
Some hours in bed and a few bad movies later and Dick was starting to look more like himself. His face had a little more color and he wasn't nearly as lethargic. Piper was glad to see it, though still generally discomfited.
“You really shouldn't have pushed yourself to travel while you were still under the weather.” He brushed Dick's bangs back and placed a kiss at his temple. “Next time, just text.”
“Sorry. To be fair, I didn't know you were going to be so compassionate about this.” Dick snuggled more firmly into Piper's arms and let out a contented sigh. “I keep forgetting that just because I don't see you at team ups, it doesn't mean you're new to this stuff. Like, you're one of few people who actually gets what it's like to have bouts of unconsciousness and being taken unexpectedly hostage and flown to a supervillain base in the middle of fucking nowhere interfere with your social obligations. Even other superheroes don't always get it.”
Piper wrinkled his brow in confusion. “Why on earth not? It must happen to them too.”
“It happens in Gotham a lot more than in other cities. My exes always assumed I had to be lying about it at least some of the time.”
“Huh. Wally has literally disappeared on me for weeks at a time. I never hold it against him. Maybe they just need to spend some time with someone whose powers involve accidental time traveling and parallel universe hopping.”
“You know, come to think of it Wally's pretty much the only friend I've got who doesn't get mad over that stuff.” Dick was quiet for a moment and Piper enjoyed running his hands through his shiny black hair. “I'm still sorry I wasn't there for you today, excusable circumstances aside. You said one on one time with your mom is still hard for you guys. Was it a total shit show?”
“It...no, I can't even pretend. It didn't go well at all. She managed to get under my skin again, and I honestly thought I'd figured out how to deal with every avenue of emotional attack she's got left. But she...urgh. She made it out like I've hurt my sister by being the problem child in the family. And I know it's bullshit. I know she's just deflecting her responsibility for failing me back onto me. Like, I wouldn't have made so many scenes if I'd been supported and protected. I know that. But she's right. At the end of the day, Jerrie has been hurt by my behavior.”
“How does your sister feel about that?”
Piper shrugged. “Who knows? I never get to talk to Jerrie without Mom and Dad around. I haven't seen her one on one since I was nineteen, when they kicked me out. Oh, sorry, according to Mom and Dad I ran away and chose to live in my car. Of course, that makes Dad reporting my car as stolen and having me arrested an odd detail in their reconstructed narrative. Because they only wanted the best for me, ever, and I kept refusing their help and support like the willful brat I am, you see.”
“God, that sucks. Hartley, I'm so sorry. Um...have you ever thought...this is kind of hard for me to gauge here, being an orphan who had supportive parents. But, um...is reconciling with them actually worth it? It sounds like you might actually need some space from them, just to heal.”
Piper closed his eyes, focusing on the silken hair sliding through his fingers and the steady rhythm of Dick's heartbeat. “I don't know. Maybe. It's just...I'm afraid we might not get the chance if we don't fix it now. We only started talking again when they got taken hostage by some upstart super criminals. Wally helped me save them, and then there's the fact that my work puts me in danger. Mom told me that...that she watches news reports in the guest house whenever Wally and I are fighting someone so that Jerrie can't hear and be upset by it, but that she can't think straight until she knows for sure that I'm safe. They do care about me. They're just...complicated people.”
“Sounds it. It also sounds like you'd never hurt your sister on purpose, so I hope you can shake your mom's barbs off. That wasn't fair of her.”
Piper nodded, and wished that feeling of guilt would dissolve under the weight of reason. He still felt bad about all the years he hadn't been allowed to see Jerrie, even though he knew it wasn't his fault.
“Um...so, um, Jerrie's turning sixteen next month. Mom and Dad are throwing her a huge, elaborate party. They're all dying to meet you, so we've been invited.”
“Sixteen? Your sister's a lot younger than you.” Jerrie was only a few years older than the new Robin. To Piper's amusement, Dick talked about the kid in a similar fond manner to how Piper talked about his sister.
“There's eleven years between us,” Piper said. “Neither of us were planned, thus the lengthy gap.”
“Ah. Yeah, I guess I was an accident too, but Mom liked to call me her special surprise. I think it was just hard to keep your birth control filled on the road.” Dick smirked. “It's a good thing I was an acrobatic prodigy. Mr. Haly eventually forgave Mom for getting pregnant once I proved to be adorable and have stage presence.”
“When did you start performing?”
“I started doing simple stuff when I was three. I was out on the swings by the time I was seven. Good times.” Something in Dick's expression turned sad, and even a bit guarded. Piper gently steered the conversation away from either of their childhood traumas until they eventually fell asleep with a new bad movie playing for background noise.