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As Donghyuck melts into Yangyang’s embrace, nursing a much too familiar heartache with a long, pathetic sigh, he thinks that perhaps, in retrospect, he should not have tempted fate like he did today.
Had he resisted, had he been good, had he not been so - so careless, perhaps the situation would not have spiralled out of control the way it did a few hours ago.
.
.
.
It all started with Zico's Any Song challenge going viral.
Donghyuck, the youthful young adult that he is, has always been aware of the existence of TikTok. It's one of his guilty pleasures watching trending TikTok compilation videos on YouTube and imagine what he and the other members can get up to if they were some normal teenagers who can afford fooling around for the world to see.
For this very reason, he never considers downloading the app, simply because he fears he will be inclined to make an account like everybody else, to upload videos comprised of silly challenges or trends, to experience something so utterly normal like he deserves to have but will never possibly happen, and so he doesn't install it, because he's been told over and over again that act of prevention is better than fixing the damage itself.
(He doesn’t need anymore reason to start doubting if this industry is right for him.)
But, Donghyuck has never been good at turning the other way round when faced with temptations. He challenges them, always tackling them head on with chin raised high as if to say; see, I may be enticed, may succumb to what the universe wants, but I am invincible and therefore will find a way to entertain the idea without ever crossing the thin, dangerous line.
Careless , Mark used to coin in with fond exasperation.
Carefree , Jaemin always defends him.
So he knows it is only about time until curiosity gets the better of him — that, or, the TikTok trend will die out on its own, taking all of its fascinations away with it as the phase passes by.
Yet, in what the universe may call as good timing, Donghyuck doesn’t get the chance to move on, since Zico sunbaenim started a wave of ‘marketing brilliance’ with the app. It is how their manager calls the trending videos, as he warns all NCT and WayV members to not even think about helping the guy chart on music sites. In his stern warning, he adds a gentler, "Yangyang, I'm talking to you specifically."
They all break into badly hidden grins as they steal a glance or two to see Yangyang’s reaction, who flushes and narrows his eyes in challenge at the reprimand, the same way Donghyuck would have done if it were thrown at him, and when their eyes accidentally meet, Yangyang rolls his eyes as to say, how dare he? and makes a big show of sending him a kissy face just for the hell of it.
Donghyuck ducks his head to hide his own grin. Though it is a pity they never got the chance to hang out much in the past few years, Donghyuck knows that the times they have crossed paths during and after their trainee days have shown they are birds of a feather who flock together. This can mean a lot of things, ranging from willingness to take one for the team in times of silly prank war against the older trainees, or presenting as invincible duo who were sent down on earth to cause eternal headaches to whoever attracted their attention.
("I'm so glad you brats are in different units," Ten complained dramatically once, like he does everything else. "So glad.")
As soon as the manager left, Donghyuck catches different movements all at once in his peripheral view. This is what usually happens when all twenty-one of them gather. They always try to have conversations longer than ‘oh, where are you going?’ and ‘training’ with those they do not see as often, and so Donghyuck decides though he misses Mark terribly with both of their insane schedules making it impossible for Donghyuck to sit down and properly talk with the older in the past few months, he thinks it can wait. Besides, their relationship has been strained lately, mostly by distance imposed from the other side. So instead, he goes over to where Yangyang, Xiaojun, Hendery, Renjun, and Chenle are huddled in a circle with rapid Chinese thrown one way to another, all while having their phones out, presumably to watch the video mentioned earlier. It reminds Donghyuck how TikTok was invented in China and a lot of the trends that went viral were started by their Chinese users.
Donghyuck likes seeing them together, likes that everyone has a place they can feel at home in this business. He thinks they must feel like helpless foreigners most of the time that he decides he'd like to let them know they have something to offer too, in the one way he knows how.
So he squeezes into the huddle between Yangyang and Renjun and whispers in Korean, and he makes sure to pronounce each syllable carefully. "Tell me more about TikTok and how to make these videos."
The grin they flash him is flattering, and Yangyang, who's more fluent in Korean than Xiaojun and Hendery are, guides him through the app with the occasional help from Renjun, who apparently, for someone who claims he does not keep updated with what young people are up to these days, seems to know a whole lot about it as well.
Donghyuck will have to give him his brand of shit later.
Since they don't have anything for the day, Yangyang asks if Donghyuck wants to try out some of the popular challenges on TikTok, and while he's happy to be invited and excited to finally try the app out, his eyes can’t help but to wander to the other side of the room, to check if —
Oh.
Mark's gone, and so have some of the other older members.
(Donghyuck tightens and untightens his fist, a habit he developed every time his heart twinges at the knowledge that Mark is going a quarter mile per second like always, leaving Donghyuck with the gaping wound that he has never bothered to tend to, for nothing really help it heals if it is not Mark. He knows this, he has tried.)
Donghyuck only lets his gaze linger a second longer than necessary, and then turns to Yangyang with a grin that he hopes conceals the sudden wave of emotion that threatens to break his cheerful demeanor. Yeah sure, I'll try out the challenges, why not, Donghyuck hears himself saying.
If Yangyang notices the dimmed light behind his eyes, he does not make a comment, and Donghyuck will forever be grateful for it.
Afterward, the app distracts him from all the baggage that life as an idol brings, the way gaming does. Some days, he even grows obsessed.
He goes back to one of his life mottos that says rules are meant to be broken and has made a private account, which has exactly six following, consisting of all of the WayV members plus Chenle, sans Kun-hyung, Winwin-hyung, and Renjun, the boring adults wannabe.
(He is still bugging Ten-hyung to follow him back, or else he'll make Yanyang steal his phone and do it himself. Ten-hyung has responded that he can and will set Taeyong and Kun on them, just watch, and Donghyuck pouts because that is so not fair.)
It is sometime around January when he gets a text from Yangyang, with a link attached.
Do this, the text says. I bet you can't get all of the hyung to kiss you.
Donghyuck stares at the message for a good three seconds, before he decides he's not weirded out after all. He clicks it open, and finds a guy recoding himself as he walks around at what Donghyuck assumes to be his school while asking to his guy friends, "Is kissing the homie gay?"
In the video, most of his friends claim no, some even sounded offended that the simple act of a kiss would imply homosexuality, and then they willingly kisses the recording guy when he asked for a kiss.
Simple.
In the video, the guy went to another friend, then another, then another, and while Donghyuck is not jealous at all, the blatant public display of platonic affection makes him think it's so unfair that he lives in a country where most guys are raised to be proud with their fragile masculinity that it would be impossible for him to do this at all.
Except, well, as Donghyuck reconsiders, he realizes Nana would probably be happy to give him a smooch, and so would Yangyang, Johnny-hyung, too. Jungwoo-hyung, most definitely. Yuta-hyung, maybe. Heechul-hyung, if Donghyuck ever gathers up the courage to ask.
Huh, he realizes.
Okay, so that's not bad at all.
He texts back, watch me.
Yangyang responds, if you get less than 10 we’re going on a date.
Donghyuck blinks.
As homies, if that’s not clear to you, another message follows.
Donghyuck chuckles, feeling relieved that Yangyang is the type who is nonchalantly confident with his sexual orientations the way he himself is, and then types back. I'm getting all 20 members to kiss me, period. I’ll pay for the date if I fail.
He's still not sure if that's the right usage of the word ‘period’, but he thinks he got the feeling right. He’s still learning these ‘stan twitter’ lingo, and Yangyang has been a great teacher.
Yangyang replies back, get ready for our date, then, because I know exactly who’s not going to give you a smooch on cam.
And then a clown face emoji.
Donghyuck glares at the response and types back, asshole, if I don’t know any better, I’d think you’re actually trying to get into my pants.
Jokes aside, Donghyuck knows who Yangyang is hinting at, and though his taunts slightly scratches at his heartache, he finds the bluntness to be refreshing. The rest of his members always seem to tiptoe around him when it comes to Mark and their on and off relationship, if one can actually call it that. For all of Donghyuck’s sunshine and joyful laughter, they seem to treat him like something fragile when it comes to this.
Dude it's actually a good thing, Yangyang texts back. If he's not willing to kiss you, I’m all for being a rebound. That, or it’s simply because it’s full-on homo when he kisses you and therefore the challenge does not apply.
Donghyuck feels his heart jump at the thought, but immediately shakes it away before he could get ahead of himself. Mark has always said no, and it has everything to do with Donghyuck in person and nothing to do with his sexual orientation. He knows this to be true because he's watched the year end show vlogs, where he's very much comfortable faking a make out with Johnny-hyung.
Donghyuck studies the challenge again, and feels like there should be no harm trying it out. Everyone knows he loves a good smooch and has no issue with being either the giver or the receiver. They also know it won’t hurt him terribly if they can’t be bothered to deal with his antics. Despite what they say about him going to get beat up one day in the future, Donghyuck is smart, has always been, and knows exactly which buttons he cannot push, just like his heart knows that it will not be fazed if Mark shoves his face away as usual.
Donghyuck grits his teeth.
He texts Yangyang back with finality before he gets to second guess himself, we'll see.
And so the mission commences.
He gets his hand on practice schedules after begging the receptionist lady with full-on aegyo , which of course works because, arrogance aside, he knows what charms work on who. He takes a photo of the schedule and gives it a quick scan, before deciding he is going to do it on the day when both NCT units are scheduled for a full-day practice. He can text Yangyang later to drag WayV to come, because there is always extra space for another group or two.
When the day finally comes, after 8 hours of guresome practice later, Donghyuck thinks about cancelling the plan altogether because he does not want anyone near his sweaty ass, so much as kissing him. But, he can see Yangyang grinning ear to ear along with Ten from where they've been watching the practice, and it immediately gets Donghyuck determined. So he calms himself down, sprays himself some febreeze nicked from Taeyong-hyung’s bag to get rid of his body odor, and picks up his phone. There's another half an hour or so before they have to leave.
He got this. It’s just a stupid, harmless challenge.
NCT Dream have finished their practice and barged into their room, too, and he thinks, well, there's no time like present.
He whips out his phone, hits record, puts on a convincing adorable expression as he exclaims, "Back here again with 37.5% viewership rating, Haechan cam!"
Some turn to him, eyebrows raised, because neither 127 or Dream were asked to vlog today. Others only spared him a glance because it is not necessarily out of the ordinary for any of them to do anything like this. The staff likes to ask them to record for filler contents too, every once in a while.
Donghyuck ignores them and strides to his first victim. He shoots, point blank. "Johnny-ssi, is kissing the homie gay?"
Johnny, with all of his barefaced glory, stares at him only for a second longer in amusement before he regains himself and answers to the camera, lips pulled into an endearing smile. "No."
Donghyuck nods happily, and bats his eyelashes up at the American, "Will you give me a kiss on the cheek then?"
Johnny breaks into a chuckle. "Sure," he says easily, and plants his cheek a good, solid smooch.
Donghyuck grins, feeling better already. "Thank you," he says dismissively, and heads over to his next closest target, leaving Johnny and his playful betrayed expression behind.
"Yuta-ssi!" he calls, and clings into his arm before the blonde gets the chance to run away--not that he would, but still.
He asks, "Is kissing the homie gay?"
"Not at all," Yuta says right away, eyes crinkling in that charming, kind smile of his.
"Do you mind giving me a kiss then?"
Yuta turns to Winwin, who rolls his eyes at how sap his boyfriend. He waves a lazy hand, a gesture that they take as ‘get it over with’. Permission granted, Yuta gives Donghyuck a quick peck on the head. "There."
Donghyuck rolls his eyes because why is he so whipped, but he accepts it and starts working his way around the room.
He has always known that his members are more comfortable showing their affection off-cam, but he is actually quite surprised to find out how much they're actually okay with kisses. He is definitely planning to call them out on their cowardice of showing the same amount of love on camera, but that's for later.
Within 15 minutes, he has already secured 7 kisses out of 20 (Johnny, Yuta, Ten, Taeyong, Jaehyun, Taeil, and Doyoung), and he is quite happy with the accomplishment. Maybe he really does have NCT wrapped around his fingers.
(And yet he fiercely desires for the one that has been keeping a ten feet pole distance away from him.)
"Hyuck, my turn," comes a familiar whine, along with a tired, "Jaemin, stop," not so far behind.
Donghyuck cannot hold back his grin, because hell yeah Nana will give him his smooch. It's Jeno who’s trickier, like the rest of the Dreamies.
Impatient, Jaemin grabs his phone from his hand, angles it a certain way, presses record, and grins to the camera, "Hey guys! No, it's not gay to kiss your homie, look."
Donghyuck barely registers the sound of Jisung’s gasp from somewhere in the room as he feels Jaemin's lips brushing against his for a brief second. The next thing he knows, Jaemin is already bodily pulled away by Jeno, who grunts, " Enough ."
Well, that's 8.
Still in Jeno’s arms, Jaemin laughs, sounding delighted. "Jeno, you should give him a kiss too!"
Jeno glares accusingly at Donghyuck like he's the one who initiated the kiss, "No."
Donghyuck raises both hands, feeling quite flattered and smug and hoping it doesn't come across his face. He thinks trying to get Jeno to kiss him will have to wait while he lets them have a banter at it.
("It's just Hyuck!"
"You had a dream about him once!"
"Don’t be selfish, he deserves all the love in the world!")
Again. Flattered. Touched. You name it. Jaemin conceals his worries well, and having been his friends forever, Donghyuck knows the kiss was merely a show of love, a silent support for his at-the-moment tender heart.
Turning away from their antics, Donghyuck looks around to determine his new target.
That is when he sees Jungwoo and Mark entering the room, having returned from the convenient store with snacks and drinks after losing rock-paper-scissors earlier.
Oh.
In an instant, the fuzzy warmth in his chest vanishes.
Shit.
He is not ready.
He pushes down the panic and looks around the room to find Yangyang. As soon as their eyes meet, Donghyuck shakes his head as subtly as possible.
No, he tries to convey.
From afar, Yangyang’s grin fades, and he frowns quizzically.
From the corner of his eyes, Donghyuck also notices Jaemin and Jeno’s bicker has slowly subsided, probably having picked up on Donghyuck’s sudden silence at Mark’s entrance.
Donghyuck clenches and unclenches his fists. He does it again, and again.
When Donghyuck fails to say anything else, Yangyang seems to catch on. He shoots him an almost sad, supportive grin, and excuses himself from the circle he's currently engaged in a conversation in, making his way to Donghyuck.
As soon as Yangyang gets close enough, he gently takes Donghyuck’s wrist. Donghyuck relaxes at the touch, enough to say under his breath, "We never said I have to do it all at once today."
"Well, it was implied," Yanyang says pointedly, though his tone is kind and understanding.
The moment Donghyuck hears it, he knows he is free to call it off, but he chances a glance to where Mark is making his way to goof around with Johnny and Ten without sparing him a single glance, and he feels the sudden need to do something, anything, to ignore the falling shards of his breaking pieces.
"Look, I don't know," Donghyuck laughs weakly, finding it hard to keep it together. "He wouldn’t, doesn’t, care."
Yangyang follows his gaze, seeing what Donghyuck is seeing, and in a split second, Donghyuck thinks he caught something in his eyes shift. He turns his attention back to Donghyuck, watching him carefully. “Will it help you feel better if I kiss you?"
Donghyuck cannot understand that logic at all, and yet he finds himself wanting to say yes, just to see. The rest, he trusts Yangyang to know how far to go, and when to stop.
“Full homie, I promise.” Yangyang says softly as he reaches for his other wrist in a gentle tug and leans into Donghyuck.
“Wait,” Jaemin interrupts, suddenly standing closer to them than Donghyuck initially thought he was. Behind him, Donghyuck notices Jeno has joined a sympathetic Renjun on the floor, seeming resigned to let Jaemin do as he likes.
(That. Haechan wants that kind of trust so badly.)
And while Donghyuck is distracted, he misses Yangyang plotting with Jaemin in a single look, he misses Jaemin fishing out for Haechan’s phone from earlier and shoving the camera on their faces.
He only realizes what is happening when Jaemin asks with volume louder than necessary, enough for the whole room to hear. “Yangyang, is it gay to kiss the homie?”
“Not at all.” The hands on his wrists are now cradling his cheeks, and Yangyang closes their distance.
Oh.
Yangyang kisses him squarely on the mouth. He holds the position for three whole seconds before ending it with a loud smacking noise and a warm, tight, embrace.
Slightly shocked, Donghyuck cannot help but laugh in hysteria into the crook of Yangyang’s neck, because why is this so easy for them but not for the one person he wants to get kissed by the most?
(He does not see all hints of smile disappearing in a second from Mark’s face when he turned around to see what brought Ten to stop mid sentence. He does not see Johnny holding Mark by his shoulder just in case, or Kun palming his face with a long suffering sigh.)
“Cut!” Donghyuck hears Jaemin say happily, or perhaps too happily. He hears him turning to ask Jeno if he wants to go next, voice still purposefully loud for a reason that Donghyuck bets everyone has easily figured out by now, if anything is to go by the sudden temperature drop in the room.
Though Donghyuck did not start this challenge as a way to get back at Mark for how he has been treating Donghyuck lately, only now he realizes that in a moment of spontaneity, Yangyang and Jaemin have teamed up to make it as one.
The tension in the room has escalated to a new height and Donghyuck senses everyone is now watching Mark uneasily, perhaps to see how he would react. Some, like Johnny and Taeyong, look ready to interfere in the case of an all out fight, and others seem somewhat more relaxed and entertained, like Ten and Jaehyun. Chenle, for one, is full on recording the entire situation from his corner, with Jisung half-hidden behind him.
Finally, Mark clears his throat, shrugs Johnny’s hand away, and plasters on an easy smile as he walks over to Donghyuck and Yangyang. He starts with this, “Were we supposed to record anything today, Donghyuck-ah?”
Donghyuck wants to laugh. Of course he will take this passive-aggressive approach. He cares too much for his image to let his emotion take hold even in situations where you’d normally deal with more brawn than brain. It is that same obsession with his image that keeps him back from being true to himself, and Donghyuck in extension.
“Yeah, we were,” Yangyang, not surprisingly, takes it all in with an easy stride. He answers with a smirk. “Not you, though.”
Something glints dangerously behind Mark’s eyes. “Ah,” he says, the tone still easy. “And it involves something along the lines of you kissing Donghyuck without his consent? Which manager-hyung requested this?”
Even in anger, Mark stays fair. They all know Yangyang prefers expressing himself in English if not his mother tongue, and so Mark switches to English to accommodate him.
“Consent was given,” Yangyang says tersely, all hints of mischief gone. “Hyuck wanted some kisses, we were just giving him what he wants.”
(Donghyuck is not fluent, but he sure feels like Yangyang just made him sound like a hoe.)
Mark’s brows raise to his hairlines. He turns to Donghyuck sharply, looking hurt. “Why were you asking for--?”
“It’s just a game, Mark-hyung,” Jaemin includes himself into the conversation, all playful and most definitely fake. “Don’t be difficult now, getting all jealous when you hardly even care.”
Mark doesn’t say anything to defend himself, though his jaw is clenched like as though he’s holding back from saying something he might regret.
“Besides, everyone else did it too,” Jaemin winks, and his grin is still too wide, too playful to be genuine. “And Hyuck liked it too, didn’t you, Hyuck?”
Donghyuck was not planning to say anything, not when Jaemin and Yangyang seemed to have it handled, but the look Mark gives him seems so distant despite their proximity, and Donghyuck is desperate for him to crack, to have the courage to come out from his golden shell and reach into Donghyuck’s mind and soul like he did years ago, when he first gave Donghyuck all that he had.
“It was nice,” Donghyuck forces.
Mark lets out a stricken laugh at the admission. He runs a hand through his greasy hair and grits out, “Right, of course.”
“That shouldn’t be a problem, right, hyung?” Yangyang is inching dangerously to where the line has been long drawn in the sand, and Donghyuck can feel the room holding their breath together with him as Yangyang continues to push, “It’s not like you have any right to take issue with it, right?”
Deep down, Donghyuck is thankful for his members for not intervening already, when they clearly can. He realizes, in a different degree of desperation in comparison to his, that they too, want to know what Mark thinks, if only to gain closure and answer to why he doesn’t initiate anything with Donghyuck anymore, when earlier this year they were still so, so in love.
Jaemin matches Yangyang’s rhythm well, because he does not miss a single beat when he finally drives them home. “Of course he doesn’t have the right to be mad, not with how he’s been treating Hyuck like crap these days.”
Something in Mark seems to finally snap. He shoves Jaemin by his shoulder with unrestrained strength, wiping the grin off his face, and the next thing they know, Jeno has gotten to his feet and is now face to face with Mark, snarling dangerously.
In a blur of a second, all of the older members crowd them at once.
“Mark,” Johnny warns, grabbing Mark tightly by the back of his shirt.
Mark clenches and unclenches his fist too, a habit he picked up from Donghyuck. He is breathing heavily, eyes still glaring at Jaemin, who is fearlessly scowling back from where Jaehyun and Doyoung are keeping him and Jeno restrained.
Everyone is looking at one another in wariness, and Donghyuck is not sure how long they stayed like that.
It is Taeyong who finally breaks the silence, because he has been forced to do this too many times before. He is standing right behind Donghyuck, and only then he realizes Taeyong’s hands are holding both his and Yangyang’s wrists. “Mark, I’m giving you five seconds to calm down.”
Mark, the ever obedient, gives him a tight nod.
“Jeno, you too,” Taeyong says, his tone commanding.
And Jeno, sweet Jeno, must have reacted on autopilot to protect Jaemin, as any boyfriend would, so he raises his hands, showing he has no intentions of turning this into an all out brawl. “Sorry hyung,” he mutters to Mark.
Mark nods, throwing him and Jaemin the same half-hearted apologies in mumbles.
Taeyong nods, and he turns to Jaemin next, who stares right back at him in deviance. “Jaemin, I’m sure you have grown mature enough to know that you had no right to make that kind of accusation on anybody. Whatever it is that you are upset with, I know you know better than to take it out on Mark in front of everybody the way you did. Can I trust you to properly apologize to him later?”
Jaemin is fierce when it comes to his loved ones. “As long as Mark apologizes to Donghyuck too.”
Though it warms his heart, Donghyuck shifts uneasily. It’s okay , he wants to say. He doesn’t care, just drop it.
His eyes search for Marks’, who pointedly looks away from Donghyuck.
See?
Taeyong is patient when he says, “We have promised to not let our personal lives intrude on our work and team dynamic, didn’t we Jaemin-ah?”
Jaemin looks away in shame, because everyone was there when he, along with Johnny and Ten, and Yuta and Wiwin, were among the very first ones to make that promise, back when he was 18 and having just announced to the room that he and Jeno are together and would make sure to remain professional in spite of the new nature of their relationship.
Taeyong continues, “Regardless of whatever issues Mark and Donghyuck have with one another, they have made sure so far that it doesn’t interfere with their work. I ask you, and everyone in this room, to respect that.”
(To anyone else, Taeyong-hyung must sound cold, apathetic, but it is the only way he knows to keep them focused, so they don’t waste away the years they have invested for this career that has seemed to stop feeling like an incredible dream anymore.)
“Yes.” Kun too, speaks up, and he exudes the alpha male vibe stronger than that of Taeyong’s, a side that Donghyuck has never seen before. The older Chinese man looks to Taeyong in a silent request, who he shares a meaningful look with, before the command is passed over to the other in a nod. He says in smooth Korean, perhaps more for everyone’s sake and to make sure his words will have the same effect on everybody as Taeyong’s do. “And that means Yangyang, I’d like for you to apologize to Mark as well for provoking him in the first place, is that clear?”
Next to him, Yangyang ducks, looking very much like he has something to say but knowing it is the smart thing to do to keep it shut for now.
“Also, for all of our sake, while this was fun, I think it is best if we delete some of the clips from earlier. That includes yours, Chenle,” Kun looks at Chenle, tone non-negotiable.
Chenle slowly nods, him and Jisung looking notably upset.
Taeyong nods. “I agree. We can’t risk having those clips leaked. Jaemin, I hope you don’t mind handing Donghyuck’s phone over?” he asks gently.
This is ridiculous.
Donghyuck doesn’t even care about the clips. He only really started this because he wanted to know where he stood with Mark, that was all. Now he knows. A plaything at worst and a distant partner at best. “I’ll do it,” he says around tight, burning throat. He suddenly feels drained. “I'm sorry for this mess,” he glances over to Taeyong-hyung and shoots with a half-smile. “I’ll get rid of them.”
He doesn’t need to look around the room to see the clear concern on the Dreamies’ face, or the frustration on Yangyang’s. He doesn’t need to look to know that Mark is still looking anywhere but him. He turns to Mark anyway, “I’m sorry, hyung,” he offers, like he always does.
Mark barely acknowledges it as he mutters, “Just don’t be so careless next time.”
Donghyuck stares, scoffs, and nods.
They all leave the practice room after that.
Thanks to his schedules, Donghyuck does not return with the rest of 127. He climbs into the Dreamies’ car and lets Jaemin rub circles into his hand on the way back, and lets Yangyang hold his hand as they snuggle on the couch later on, when WayV makes a visit to their dorm after Chenle picked them up with his family car and driver.
Yangyang brings Donghyuck sushi as an apology for how things went south, and Donghyuck asks if he wants to watch all the clips he managed to record together before he deletes them. Yangyang says yes, they laugh at all the silly ones, and they file them all into memory.
They cuddle up in the living room, with Jaemin and Jeno keeping them company. The others have gone to hang out in Renjuns’s room, probably to talk about Donghyuck or Mark or both. Only Kun and Ten decided to opt out, Kun to clean up the mess and Ten to draw on his iPad in silence in the dining room.
“Mark’s an ass,” Yangyang finally says after a while, when they have fallen into comfortable silence.
Kun throws Yangyang an exasperated look from where he’s cleaning up the dishes, but makes no further comment.
Donghyuck checks his phone for the hundredth time that evening, wondering if Mark will text or call or anything at all.
“Block him,” Yangyang suggests.
“He’ll just unblock him in the morning,” Jaemin mumbles, letting Jeno play with his hair. “We’ve been through this so many times.”
Yangyang shakes his head, “What’s his problem?”
“He’s never been good with his feelings,” Jaemin shrugs. “They were actually happy for the first few months after they decided to date, before it went downhill after his graduation from Dream.”
Donghyuck remembers it all too clearly. He remembers Mark growing distant for a while, before they grew close again during their US tour, and then distant again, after. They’ve been staying in that cycle since, and every single time Donghyuck says to Jaemin, this is it, he always comes back the next month going, Jaemin-ah, I love him.
They always confront him, always.
Renjun, who never bothers to hide his frustration when Donghyuck visits the Dreamies’s dorm grinning ear to ear, demanding, “I thought you were done, Donghyuck-ah?”
Then there’s Jeno, who is always kind by default and understands that the heart longs for what it wants and always asks if he wants to play games with him when he is down after a whole month of radio silence from Mark.
Finally, there is Jaemin, whom despite all the love and sweetness in him, can turn vicious and have been giving Mark the cold shoulder since SuperM, only friendly on camera because the job requires him to. The only reason he has not outright confronted Mark yet is because Donghyuck asked him not to.
Chenle and Jisung - they too try their best to be good supportive systems, in their own ways.
“He loves you, Donghyuck-ah,” Ten says from the dining table, locking his iPad and giving them his full attention.
Donghyuck turns to him, and finds that his heart does not flutter at the idea. He’s heard this one too often, with all sorts of explanations that come with it. Johnny says the same, and so does Jaehyun. It is Yuta who disagrees that Mark cares about Donghyuck at all, because to him, love should not cause the other half so much pain like he does to Donghyuck.
“Love’s not enough, hyung,” Donghyuck says, because it is the truth, and it hurts less the more he says it out loud. Two can love and things will not work out if they do not share the same values, dreams, future, or in a long distance. Love does not work if all the puzzle pieces do not fit, and that’s how Donghyuck understands his relationship with Mark. They tried to make it fit the first time around, cut out all the pieces that do not belong to force them together, and now they are left with jagged edges squeezed into places that are not meant to be.
Ten’s smile is sad. “It isn’t, is it?”
And that’s why him and Johnny, too, fell apart, because one day they woke up realizing their pieces have changed and stopped fitting altogether, and they were left to confront the harsh reality of figuring out where to go from there.
They were mature enough to have a proper conversation about it, have never been raised in a household where men are taught they could not be vulnerable. They threw all the cards on the table and decided to pursue their dreams separately and still maintain good relationships with one another.
Everyone hopes they will one day wake up to realize their pieces still match, after they accomplish their dreams.
Maybe time is what he needs, too, after being so infatuated with Mark for years.
“I’ll get over him,” Donghyuck says eventually. “What happened today clearly showed our relationship wasn’t going to go anywhere. He won’t say anything to end it because he’s an ass, but I’ll get around to it as soon as I feel better. Give it time.”
Jaemin must have heard this a million times before, and yet he says, a million times over, “You know we support you.”
“Yeah, we do.” Yangyang takes his hand, playing with his fingers. He adds, “But promise me one thing.”
Donghyuck lifts his head, “What?”
“You’re still paying for that homie date.”
Donghyuck chuckles, feeling a sudden rush of immense gratitude for the friends he has. “Alright, you cheap ass.”
“Make it a double date,” Jaemin suggests playfully.
“You’re going to be paying for yourself,” Donghyuck sticks out his tongue.
“He won’t,” Jeno murmurs, eyes closed and possibly 5 minutes away from deep slumber.
“You heard the boyfriend,” Jaemin grins.
“Might as well take Renjun, too,” Yangyang says. “Then we’ll pull the eldest card on him and get food for free.”
Donghyuck lets himself find joy in the little that he can and presses himself closer to Yangyang for comfort.
All things considered, Donghyuck realizes perhaps he is never really invincible after all, but he cannot find it within himself to regret what happened. He needed to do this, for his own sake. So perhaps he was enticed, and he did succumb to the universe and got his own ass handed back to him on a silver platter in regards to some things, but he too found new friendship along the way.
“I’m going to say something in a totally homie way,” Donghyuck says to no one in particular.
He does not get any replies, but he knows they are listening, waiting.
“I love you,” he says, and means it.
It will not heal the wound Mark’s left, but that is not what he’s looking for anyway. Though he may not fully recover from this until he gets to the bottom of the issue with the person concerned, he thinks he can be filled with comfort in a hundred different ways.
“I love you.” He hears it said back in multiple voices, and feels carefree again.

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