Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

1. Table of Contents. Currently here.
2. childhood. A prologue, of sorts. Takes place before the manga. 156 words. backstory.
3. reasons. Why you enroll in Jujutsu Tech. Takes place before the manga. 234 words. backstory.
4. midnight. Sleep comes slowly the night after Itadori Yuji’s death. Takes place after the Cursed Womb Arc. 781 words. comfort.
5. my type. After learning Fushiguro’s type in girls, you start to wonder. Takes place during the Cursed Training Arc. 1,482 words. fluff.
6. team fight. Team Tokyo gets ready for the Exorcism Race. Takes place at the beginning of the Kyoto Goodwill Event Arc. 1,032 words. action.
7. confession. You confess your feelings to Fushiguro... kind of. Takes place during the Kyoto Goodwill Event Arc. 878 words. fluff.
8. facing things head-on. You try to become stronger -- as a person, and as a jujutsu sorcerer. Takes place after the Kyoto Goodwill Event Arc. 1,728 words. angst.
9. behind closed doors. After seeing you and Fushiguro fumbling around each other for too long, Gojo, Itadori, and Kugisaki hatch a plan. It doesn’t go as expected… or does it? Takes place after some time after "facing things head-on". 3,027 words. angst/fluff.
10. ❀ island in the sun. A train ride home. Takes place some time before the Shibuya Arc. 421 words. fluff.
11. ❀ rainy day mornings. It’s the perfect weather to sleep in. Takes place some time before the Shibuya Arc. 437 words. fluff.
12. ❀ secret santa. It’s the holiday season, and there’s shopping to do. Takes place some time before the Shibuya Arc. 1,116 words. fluff.
13. ❀ cold. Fushiguro’s not sick. Or at least, that’s what he says. Takes place some time before the Shibuya Arc. 1,092 words. fluff.

❀ denotes a chapter that doesn't take place at a specific time, and is mostly just a fluffy drabble :))

Chapter Text

There are many things your grandparents tell you. 

Don’t leave metal spoons in a pot. Be back before sunset. Listening is more important than talking. Don’t go outside when an owl is crying. Your mother used to love peonies.

But one always gets repeated the most.

“Don’t be selfish,” your grandmother scolds, as she takes the box of wagashi sweets and places it high above the countertop, far away from your eager hands. “They’re gifts for your father when he finally visits next week.”

You bow your head, wrapping your fingers around each other as you nod in apology.

Don’t be selfish . 

Gods know you’ve already taken so much from your grandparents, after all. From their daughter’s own life to their son-in-law’s presence, your birth alone required too much in return.

And when you begin to show signs of having inherited the Family Technique, you wonder if you were only continuing to take more for yourself.

Chapter Text

“Why do you want to become a jujutsu sorcerer?”

The stuffed bear launches itself off the floor, ricocheting off the pillars inside as it locks on to your position.

You close your eyes, focusing on the bundle of cursed energy bouncing around the room as you raise the string of paper dolls in front of you. 

“ Bind. ”

The paper talisman shoots out, darting around as it finally captures the stuffed bear. You motion the paper to shoot down towards you, stepping on the plush with a satisfying squeak as it struggles underneath. 

“I can’t be selfish.” You raise your head to stare at the principal, looking him in the eye as your fingers tighten into a fist. “If I have a power that others don’t, it’s my responsibility to use such a gift in order to help them.”

“Hmm.” The stuffed bear flies out from under your foot back into Principal Yaga’s hand. 

“But what will you do when those who cannot protect themselves, refuse to acknowledge you? What will you do when the same people you save, turn around to curse the ground you walk on?”

The silence that follows is deafening, interrupted only by the sound of paper crinkling as you weave your extra ofuda between your fingers. 

You open your mouth to respond.

Chapter Text

“Can’t sleep?”

You look up from the sink, giving a blank stare in the direction the voice comes from.

Fushiguro’s black hair and pajamas offer a stark contrast to the bright lights of the dorm kitchen as he strolls in, hand drowsily rubbing his shoulder. 

You give him an absent gaze.

“Careful.” He reaches forward to turn off the faucet and you jerk your hand back, realizing that the mug you were re-filling had already been filled some time ago. The leftover water spills over the edge, splashing into the sink.

“Oh.” You hadn’t even noticed.

You mumble a small sorry as you step away from the sink, turning to lean against the kitchen counter as Fushiguro takes your place to refill his water bottle.

Hearing the faucet close, you expect to see him return to his room, but blink in surprise as he moves to lean next to you, silently keeping you company.

The steady hum of the fluorescent lights overhead keep the both of you company in the ambient silence as you stare down at your water, fingers fiddling around the mug.

You gaze at your reflection in the water. There’s a bandage wrapped around your forehead, as well as one pasted on your nose. There’s more wrapped around your torso, but you silently think about how yours and Kugisaki’s injuries feel like nothing compared to what happened to Fushiguro and worst of all, Itadori.

“If…” You suck in a shaky breath. “If all three of us were conscious, do you think we could have saved him?”

Fushiguro lets out a deep breath, shifting his weight against the counter as he considers your question. 

“...I don’t know.” He finally admits, eyebrows furrowing as he laces his fingers together in thought. “Maybe we could have made Sukuna desperate enough to regenerate, but considering his power, we might have all died in the end as well.”

Your throat tightens at that and your eyes burn, tears threatening to spill out. 

“I’m-- I’m sorry,” you choke out, your voice almost a whisper. “Maybe if I was stronger…”

“Don’t say that.” Fushiguro frowns, his lips curling downwards as he glances towards you. “You and Kugisaki were hurt enough already.” 

His hand reaches out towards the bandage wrapped around your head, fingers brushing against the fabric. His touch is feather light, ghosting across your forehead towards your temple as you shiver at the feeling. 

He jerks his hand away at that, looking away as he shifts to rub the back of his neck. “There was nothing we could have done in the end.”

You tuck a few stray strands of hair behind your ear, his touch still lingering on your forehead. You struggle to muster a reply--was there really nothing you could have done? Nothing at all? Even if the heavens and the earth were to move in tune against the strings of fate, was Itadori Yuji’s death inevitable?

You hadn't known him for a long time at all. He was just another classmate you were still getting to meet. Just another jujutsu sorcerer.

Just another friend.

Your fingers tighten around your mug, knuckles growing white as your stare bores into the rippling water. “He deserved better.”

“Yeah,” Fushiguro replies, letting out a small sniffle. “He did.”

You close your eyes, letting yourself focus on nothing else but the sound of Fushiguro’s breathing, the humming lights, and your own shaky breaths. 

Inhale, exhale.

Deep breath in, deep breath out.

In, out.

In, out.

You open your eyes slowly to glance at the clock on the wall. 

4AM. 

If you’re lucky enough, you’ll still be able to get enough sleep to stay conscious tomorrow, though you doubt you’ll get away without a severe migraine. As if on cue, your mouth stretches to let out a yawn as you push away from the kitchen counter. “I think that’s a signal that I should try and sleep.”

Fushiguro nods, before letting out a yawn of his own. It’s only then that you notice how bleary his eyes are with sleep, and instantly you feel a sharp pang of guilt for keeping him up so late.

The two of you walk out of the kitchen into the dorm hall, and you watch as he turns to go back to his room.

“Thank you, Fushiguro.” You say, looking at his back. “For keeping me company.”

“No problem.” He rubs the back of his neck, turning towards you with a tired shrug. “Goodnight.”

You give him a small nod and turn to go back to your own dorm room. “Goodnight.”

Chapter Text

“Maki-senpai , what does it mean for someone to have ‘unshakable character’?”

She frowns at your question, eyeing your injuries. “Did Mai mess up your head as well when she shot you?”

“No! At least, I think not.” Your hands move to your now-healed thigh, fingers ghosting over the area where one of Mai’s bullets had gone through. 

“It’s not even the exchange event and you’re hurting each other already?” Shouko-san sighs as she watches the three of you enter the school clinic , your arms around Kugisaki and Maki-senpai as you hobble in half-delirious from blood loss.

You let out a shaky laugh as you’re hauled onto the hospital bed, sucking in a breath as the jacket around your leg is untied. 

Kugisaki lets out a “tch”, frowning at your wound. “It was two against one. If Mai didn’t get so desperate, we would’ve squashed her.” She humphs as Shouko-san shoos them out of the room to change you into a hospital gown.

“Then why’re you asking?” Maki-senpai rests her chin on top of her staff, tilting her head in confusion.

Because I finally found out my crush’s type in girls and now I’m having an identity crisis over whether or not I fit it.

Yeah, like hell you’re saying that.

“...Everybody seems to be so certain about what they want to do, and who they want to save. Or maybe they just don’t worry about it at all.” You look down at the holes on Kugisaki’s jacket, which you’re currently patching up for her as she gets fixed up by Shouko-san in the clinic. “Fushiguro wants to save people who are kind, you and Kugisaki don’t care, and Itadori just wanted to save everybody.”

You pierce the needle through the side of one hole, tying a knot before beginning the stitch. “Compared to you all, I just feel so... confused. I want to save everybody, but at the same time I know that’s impossible. But I also don’t want to have to pick and choose, because I’m afraid that’ll just make me selfish.” 

You let out a deep sigh, leaning back to let your head rest against the building. The summer heat is slowly beginning to fade, and the cicadas have started to chirp less and less. It’s calm, but the thoughts mulling around in your head are anything but.

Maki-senpai lets out a scoff at your explanation, tapping her fingers against her staff. “It’s only your first year--don’t stress out so much about motivations and morality and all that. And to answer your question…” She straightens up, spinning her staff around her shoulders before twirling it to point it at your forehead. “In my opinion, having unshakable character means striving not for what you can get , but what you can be. Things like working hard for a better world, or being nice even if no one is watching.”

She gives you a small smile, pulling her staff away to rest it on one shoulder. “Kind of like an ideal jujutsu sorcerer, y’know?”

“An ideal jujutsu sorcerer, huh…” You look down at your finished patchwork, the holes on Kugisaki’s jacket now fully covered. “Am I a nice person?”

“...You know you’re literally fixing Kugisaki’s jacket when she didn’t even ask you too, right?”

You frown. “Yeah, but you are watching--”

“Phew! Feeling much better now.” You’re interrupted as Kugisaki exits the clinic room, stretching her arms as she walks out. “Thanks, Shouko-san !”

Shouko-san hums, giving the three of you a tired wave as she closes the door to leave the clinic--no doubt planning to get some peace and quiet after having healed the two of you.

“Ah, by the way, Kugisaki,” you hold up her fixed windbreaker from your seat on the bench. “I patched up your jacket for you. I ran out of white thread for the last one though, so I used pink to try and make it look like a heart.” You glance at the small detail, located on one of the holes that were near the bottom-right of her jacket. “Is that okay?”

“You. Are. A. Blessing.” She takes the jacket from your hands, smiling as she gives it a once over before leaning over to give you a hug. “What would my wallet do without you? And after I got a 30% discount for this from Adidas, too.”

You laugh as you pull her to sit on the bench with you, letting her rest her head on your shoulder. Maki-senpai takes this chance to squeeze onto the bench as well, setting down her staff. 

“So, anymore existential questions?”

Kugisaki lets out a laugh. “Not from me. What were you guys talking about before?”

You shoot Maki-senpai a look of “wait, no” but it’s already too late.

“Oh, she was asking something about what it meant to have ‘unshakable character’.”

Oh god .

Kugisaki furrows her eyebrows at that, processing the statement. “‘Unshakable character?’ I mean, unless you’re-- Wait.” Her head jerks off your shoulder as she turns to stare at you. “No way.”

Suddenly, your shoes have become incredibly interesting.

“Since when did you have a crush on Fushiguro?”

Maki-senpai somehow manages to accomplish the feat of choking on thin air. “Wait, she what? ”

“ I don’t! ” You respond, looking up to glare at them before burying your face in your hands as they both look at you with a raised eyebrow. You let out a groan as you let yourself slide off the bench, finding solace in the cold, hard floor as Maki-senpai lets out a whistle.

“What do you even like about him, anyways?” She asks.

You peek out from between your fingers. “I told you, I don’t . And… he’s nice.”

Kugisaki scoffs. “That’s a low fucking bar.”

“Well, it’s-- ” You hesitate. 

When exactly did you start “liking” Fushiguro? Was it the day you first met him, when you got off the bullet train at Shinjuku and somehow got lost immediately , only to bump into him when he found you wandering the streets of Harajuku? Was it the first time you saw him use his Cursed Technique, unafraid of moving in to attack with his own fists in close-combat? Or maybe it was the day you saw him smile, noticing how long and pretty his eyelashes were, or maybe it was the time you found out you both shared the same taste in music, or--

“He’s nice,” you finally explain. “He comes off as cold and standoff-ish, but in reality he really cares about the people around him. Even though he says that he’s selfish, he’s one of the most selfless people I know when it comes to helping those in need.” You put down your hands to stare blankly into the distance, watching the tree leaves flutter in the wind. “He’s calm, and… comfortable. I feel at home, like I can talk about anything and everything when I’m with him. It’s hard to explain.”

“Well, you just did.”

You fight back the urge to kick Kugisaki’s leg, glaring up at her. “Hey-”

“Whoa, what happened to you, Fushiguro?”

Maki-senpai ’s surprised voice jolts you up as you look to see Panda-senpai , Inumaki-senpai , and most importantly, Fushiguro turning the corner towards the school clinic. Panic jolts through your body as you realize he may have heard you, but it’s quickly replaced with shock as you see the amount of blood on his head, still dripping down his face. The back of his jacket is already half-soaked in red as he walks over, unsteady.

“Fushiguro! What happened to you!?” You jump up, rushing over to help him walk as you loop his arm over your shoulder. 

“Todo-senpai was going ham by the time we got there, but luckily we were able to break it up!” Panda-senpai smiles like he’s ignoring how Fushiguro seems to be bleeding half-to-death and is probably severely concussed.

“Salmon.” 

“-‘s fine,” Fushiguro mumbles, eyes fluttering as you feel his weight begin to shift more to yours. “Wasn’t using my full strength anyways--” he stumbles, and you struggle to adjust as you help him towards the clinic. The door swings open as Inumaki-senpai steps in, only to poke his head out a few seconds later. “Okaka?”

“Ah, Shouko-san just went out for a break--”

“Fushiguro!?” Your steps falter as his body goes limp, weighing down towards the ground. You yelp and move forward to catch him, his neck falling on your shoulder as you slide your arms around his torso in a shabby attempt to stay standing.

“Um,” your face heats up as you struggle under his weight. Why is he so heavy!?  “Some help, please?”

When the weight on your body is lifted with Panda-senpai ’s assistance and Inumaki-senpai has run off to find where Shouko-san went off to, you take the opportunity to give Maki-senpai and Kugisaki as menacing a glare as possible.

You get a laugh and a smug smile in return.

Chapter Text

The paper doll you were both touching floats into the air, the words [Bind] slowly being inscribed on the surface and the name [Zenin Mai] appearing in smaller letters on the back.

“That it?” Maki-senpai raises an eyebrow as she glances at the talisman, watching as it twirls in the air for a bit before returning to its place amongst the other dolls on the tatami. All of them have the same spell written on the front, with the names of the other Kyoto students similarly inscribed on the back.

“Yep,” you answer, motioning for the dolls to float in the air and letting them spin around you in circles. With the 5 tracking talismans completed, you let out a breath. “Since you’re her twin sister, and I helped to channel cursed energy into the doll, not a lot of power is needed for it to recognize her.”

Zenin Mai. Miwa Kasumi. Kamo Noritoshi. Todo Aoi. Nishimiya Momo. “All we’re missing is… Mechamaru-senpai .” You sigh, leaning back as you consider the last upper-classman. “None of us know his real name, so unfortunately I won’t be able to track him.”

“Eh, just one person to really pay attention to.” Maki-senpai waves her hand, and you hold back the instinctive urge to reply with an apology.

“By the way, what do these do?” Itadori reaches out to poke at the talismans floating around you, funeral frame forgotten on the floor. You squawk as one of them wobbles in the air in response to his probing, quickly snatching it out of the air and inspecting it for damage.

“They’re tracking talismans,” you explain, frowning as you gently smooth over the paper before releasing it back to the air. “Once the person it’s tracking enters a specific range, it’ll immediately fly to them and cast the spell written on the back -- in this case, binding.” 

Itadori continues to watch the floating talismans as he listens. “So it is like Inumaki-senpai’s technique!”

“Tuna mayo.”

“It’s a spellcasting technique that occurs through paper,” Fushiguro explains. “Just like Kugisaki imbues her nails and dolls with cursed energy, the same can be done with paper to have the same effect.”

“Ah, but Kugisaki’s technique functions differently and is more resilient. After all, paper is--” You stare at Itadori as he pokes Todo Aoi’s floating talisman, ripping a hole through the center.

“--really easy to tear.”

A small part of your soul dies as the paper doll floats to the ground, tattered and useless.

Just how strong is Itadori anyways? Fushiguro mentioned that he was unparalleled in terms of pure strength, but… scratch that, would your tracking talismans even be able to make it to their target if they could be destroyed so easily? A single poke destroyed it. Oh gods, what if it got punctured on a tree branch before it reached them? Then the spell wouldn’t have even be casted and you’d just be littering on the field, chucking slips of paper at people and hoping something would happen. Maybe that’s why you always got so many papercuts -- mother nature herself must be tormenting you for having inherited such a technique but still not being able to use it to its fullest. If only you could--

“First you come back to life, and now you go around breaking things!?” You’re snapped out of your overthinking by the sound of Kugisaki giving Itadori a hard bonk on the head with her fist.

“Hey, I already said I’m sorry!” Itadori dodges from her wrath, picking the funeral frame back up and poking his head through the center. “I’m atoning, okay? Atoning!”

You giggle as he gets back on his knees to apologize, taking out another paper doll to inscribe. “Sorry Fushiguro, but you’re going to have to relive the moment Todo-senpai beat you up a second time. And Itadori, I still expect a 10,000 yen payment for the emotional damage you caused."

“Ten thousand--” He gapes as his head whips around to stare at you, eyes wide. “But I haven’t even gotten my stipend these past weeks because I’ve been considered dead!”

“It’s fine, you’ll make it up somehow!” Kugisaki waves him off. “Oh, and you can give me an extra 5,000 yen for fraud and deceit.”

Fushiguro groans as he makes his way back to the tatami seat, sitting down next to you. “Isn’t charging him like this a version of fraud as well?”

“...This sounds more like extortion to me.” Panda-senpai considers, placing a paw on his chin. “Though whether or not it’d hold up in a court of law is a different story.”

“Salty salmon?”

Maki-senpai agrees with Inumaki-senpai , shooting Panda-senpai a confused glance. “Yeah, why do you know so much about this?”

He humphs, crossing his arms in defiance. “I am Panda. I care much about the Japanese justice system.” 

“...So, why do I have to be the one to help channel Todo-senpai’s talisman, again?” Fushiguro places his finger on the head of the paper doll, closing his eyes as he concentrates. 

You close your eyes as well, focusing on channeling cursed energy into the talisman. “Well, it’s because you’re the closest person to him.”

“He asked me for my type of woman and then beat me up.”

“So you’re the closest person to him.”

Todo-senpai’s talisman darts out from the corner of your eye, making its way through the trees. “3 o’clock!” You yell out, and immediately the team splits up in their respective directions. While Panda-senpai, Inumaki-senpai, and Kugisaki make a sharp turn to the right, you turn with Maki-senpai and Fushiguro towards the path on the left.

As if on cue, Todo-senpai barges through the bushes with a roar. “Good! Let’s have everyone come at me all at--”

The talisman finds its mark, broken branches blocking his vision and distracting him from the slip of paper that attaches onto his forehead. Immediately he stops moving, freezing mid-step and providing Itadori the opening to land a perfect knee strike straight to the face.

Nice!  

Itadori weaves away after his attack to put in some extra distance, and you take out a normal talisman to send towards Todo-senpai’s location for good measure.

You snap your fingers. “ [Explode] .”

Chapter Text

“What'cha reading?” You tilt your head towards the book Fushiguro has, your hands busy as you fold paper stars.

"The Shining Calendar.” He lifts the book cover in your direction so you can read it yourself, before resting it back on his lap. “It’s about human life and the 24 seasons.”

“Wah , so deep.” The star makes a plink as you drop it into a glass jar that’s already full with them. “Right now is…” You count the seasons on your fingers, before finally reaching the 14th. “Shosho ? What does it say about now?”

“Mmhm.” His fingers slide across the book’s spine, pages fluttering by as he searches for the right page. As his eyes glide back and forth between the pages, you can’t help but notice how his eyelashes flutter when he blinks.

Maybe it’s the fact that he’s still recovering from his fight with Hanami, or the fact that you can still hear the faraway sounds of Todo- senpai chasing Itadori down as he yells something about tall girls, but Fushiguro’s mouth is set in a stiffer line than usual. At a glance he looks like his typical, stoic self, but there’s something about the way his shoulders are tensed up, and the corners of his lips are curling downwards in a slight grimace, that makes you worry.

“Got it. Shosho, the end of the heat. The season when autumn comes in a breeze, its scent trailing behind the waning temperature of the day. Yet with its chill come strong rains and winds, signaling the season of typhoons. Beware of the soft breeze and the changing of the leaves, lest you be swept away by its hypnotizing stream.” He finishes reading the beginning blurb of the chapter and stops to look out at the open window.

You follow his gaze, looking outside to where the trees still shine green and the summer heat still lingers. Though you can’t hear Todo- senpai and Itadori anymore, their yelling has been replaced with the chatter of what sounds like Maki- senpai and Kugisaki.

A breeze comes in through the window, and you let out a hum as it causes the bead curtains behind you to chime. The book isn’t wrong -- the summer heat has started to die down recently, and it won’t be long until the leaves begin to turn. Soon the trees will become hues of gold and red, and it will have been 4 months since you entered Jujutsu Tech.

4 months of living in Tokyo.

4 months of exorcising curses.

4 months of....

“Hey, Fushiguro?”

“Yeah?”

“I like you.”

“...”

The glass jar clinks as you twist the cap back on, too afraid to look back up and meet his gaze. “Not romantically, I think. Not that I know what ‘love’ is, but… you’re comforting. It’s nice being around you.”

It’s not a confession. But at the same time, it is. Why else would you be so nervous, with your heart pounding at the rate of 5 million beats per second? What’s the purpose of this? What do you want to even say?

You stand up, taking the glass jar filled with lucky stars and holding it out to him as you finally muster the courage to peek in his direction.

The first thing you notice is that the previous tension from his shoulders is completely gone, as well as the grimace. Instead, it’s been replaced with a face of pure shock, his eyebrows struggling to find their normal position on his face in confusion.

Despite all your jitters and unease, you can’t help but let out a laugh at his expression.

“Come on! Take it.” You hold the jar of stars closer to him, beckoning for him to go ahead. “It’s for good luck.”

Fushiguro takes the jar from you, rotating it in his hands as the jumble of colors swim around in the glass.

“There are 101 in them, so it’s enough to make a wish too.” Your smile grows as you watch the light from the window pass through the jar, causing a kaleidoscope of colors to reflect onto his shirt and face. “You said you wanted to become stronger, right? Hopefully these will help.”

“And if you become stronger, I hope you’ll be less willing to sacrifice yourself in fights. Itadori’s death was already scary, and I think Gojo- sensei might actually lose his shit if you’re gone.” 

It’s a selfish wish, but you try to justify it with the idea that Fushiguro’s wellbeing = you, Kugisaki, and Itadori’s wellbeing, = Gojo- sensei not being as crazy, = the jujutsu higher-ups maybe not dying (emphasis on maybe).

That gets a small laugh out of him, and a smile spreads on his face as he sets the glass jar down in his lap. “I’ll make sure to remember that. Thanks.” Fushiguro looks almost sheepish as he looks at it, scratching the back of his neck.

“Of course, it’s nothing.” You wave the beaded curtain to the side as you step out, leaving him to rest. “See ya!”

“See ya.” He gives a small wave and nods. 

It’s only until you step outside of the room and close the door behind you that you finally squat down and let out a silent scream into your hands.

Aaaahhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!?????????????

Chapter Text

Another punch is developed straight to your face and you hear the crack of cartilage in your nose as it gets busted for what feels like the 5th time this week.

“Oop, my bad!” Gojo-sensei apologizes, in a voice that is anything but. He makes a show of shaking out his hand, whistling as he stretches. “You can get that fixed by Shouko later. If she’s not hammered already, that is.”

You groan from your sprawled position on the floor, bringing your hands up to your poor nose and trying to wipe away the blood coming out. 

Rolling on to your side, you stare at the wall.

What are you doing wrong?

No, you know what you’re doing wrong. You’re horrible at close-combat, and mediocre at best when it comes to anything else. Training with Maki -senpai has slowly helped you improve your skills with some weapons, but since you were training with Gojo-senpai today on hand-to-hand combat, you were, frankly, a complete and utter mess.

“Why do you want to train with me, anyways? Maki’s better help if you want to improve your weapon skills. Oh!” Gojo-sensei claps his hands together, the completely wrong idea popping into his head. “Maybe you’re more of a masochist than I thought?”

“Maki-senpai’s been busy lately, so I didn’t want to bother her again.” You frown. “Wait, you’re my teacher. Why shouldn’t I ask you for help first? And who said I’m a masochist?”

You let out a deep sigh. “Why am I so weak?”

“Your reaction speed is horrible, for starters.” Gojo- sensei hums, tapping his finger on his chin as he goes over the last minute. “Your general speed isn’t bad, but you’re not very good at adapting to sudden changes. For example,” he points at your arms. “When we first started, I was using my legs to deliver kicks. You noticed that, and kept your stance relatively low to adjust. But as I started using my arms more, you didn’t move your hands as up as you should have to start protecting your face.” He mimics the proper stance, delivering punches to the air as he explains. 

He’s right. Of course he is. He always is, as much as you hate to admit it. 

You want to excuse your poor stance and reaction time on the fact that you’re normally relatively far away from the action -- at a comfortable range where you can see what’s going on, but also able to carry out attacks through your talismans -- but it’s a bad one and you know it. After all, Inumaki-senpai ’s cursed technique is Cursed Speech, and yet he’s perfectly fine holding his own during fights. Even Itadori, who, despite his relative newness to controlling cursed energy, makes up for it with remarkable physical strength and agility.

But what do you have? A couple slips of paper and some origami skills.

You feel completely and utterly unremarkable. The others are already moving so far ahead, yet you’re still trudging behind like your feet are stuck in cement. You’re weak and a burden in fights, a habitual failure- “ Ow!”

A sharp pain hits your forehead, interrupting your train of thought.

“Hey, you’re doing it again. Are you even listening?” Gojo-sensei squats down in front of you, flicking your forehead again for good measure. You slap his hand away before he can do it a third time, sitting up and muttering a small thank you as he hands you a box of tissues.

“It’s written all over your face, you know. ‘I’m weak’, ‘I’m useless’, ‘I’m just getting in the way’. You think too much, and that’s what slows you down.” He taps his temple. “Take a look at Yuji, for example. You think he gives a shit about the consequences of his actions?”

“...Yes?”

“No. He always acts first before thinking, and that’s partly because he’s missing a lot of brain cells, but also because he doesn’t need to . You spend too much time in your head thinking, and that’s what slows you down.”

His comment makes you go silent as you consider what he says. There’s truth to his words, but you can’t help but feel a growing uncertainty towards them.

“Then what should I do?” You ask, fingers playing with the tissue around your nose and pulling at the fraying ends. “Just start throwing punches regardless of what might happen? Jump into danger even though I know I might not make it out alive?”

“Why not?”

Gojo-sensei’s answer takes you by surprise, and you look at him to see a dangerous glint in his eyes peeking out from above his sunglasses. They pierce your gaze, and you have to look away to stop yourself from shivering as he continues.

“If you go around avoiding things unless they have a 100% certainty, then there’s no point in even going outside. So what if you jump into a fight and it doesn’t necessarily go your way? It isn’t life if there isn’t any risk.” He gives you that typical teacher-grin he has in class when you’re learning about a topic he’s sure about, and reaches out a hand to help you up from the floor. 

“Now I’m not telling you to go become a suicidal maniac, but considering how much you like to overthink, I think it’d help to turn your brain off sometimes. And with how you are, you’d probably still be able to worry about the important stuff instinctively, without thinking about it too much.” 

You mumble a small “I’ll try” as you take his hand, stumbling a bit as you’re yanked onto your feet. Blood rushes away from your head at your sudden movement, and you feel yourself wobble after he lets go. While you’d love to turn off your brain and stop thinking, some things are easier said than done. 

“Sensei, can I ask one more question?”

“What’s up?”

You look down at your hand -- at the growing blisters on your palm and the clusters of paper cuts around your fingers. “How did you learn to use your Reverse Cursed Technique?”

He doesn’t reply, and the prolonged silence that follows makes the room grow cold. He opens his mouth to give an answer, only to immediately close it again.

“I’ve already asked Shouko-san , but you can probably guess it didn’t help.” You recall how her explanation was just a shrug and a myriad of hand movements and sound effects that you could barely understand, much less interpret. The second Reverse Technique user, Okkotsu-senpai , was studying abroad overseas, which left you with one last person to ask.

“...Gojo-sensei?”

“It’s… complicated,” he finally answers, and you can’t help but frown. Of course learning it was complicated, why else would you ask?

“In order to understand the reverse technique, you need to understand the core of cursed energy.” He stops, noticing your confused gaze and amends his explanation. “What I’m saying is -- the reverse technique is born from multiplying negative cursed energy with negative, right?

“Yeah.”

“So that’s the keyword -- multiplying.” He crosses his arms, tilting his head to one side as you’re pulled into what feels like another math lecture. “When you’re trying to turn negative energy into positive, you have to remember that you can’t just add more negative energy to itself. Do you know what the difference between addition and multiplication is?”

You blink, trying to come up with an answer. You learned addition and multiplication when you were 8, so you should know the answer, right? Right? “One is putting things together, and the other is… the same process repeated?”

He snaps his fingers. “Not exactly. While addition is, like you said, the combination of two like items, multiplication is the scaling of different quantities. So if you want to multiply negative energy with negative to positive, you need to keep in mind that you’re trying to scale the negative energy you have, into a different entity. Got it?”

You don’t get it. “I… get it?”

He laughs, giving you a slap on the back before exiting the training room. “You’ll get it sooner or later. And don’t forget to get that nose fixed by Shouko!”

Gojo-sensei leaves you confused and bleeding in the middle of the room, and you continue staring at his disappearing figure before moving to leave. You continue to mull over his words as you make your way to the school clinic, trying to make sense about what he said about scaling negative energy into positive energy -- and then you remember he also recommended that you turn your brain off, and decide to stop thinking about it altogether. “...Ah.”

“Ah.”

Fushiguro is on his way to the school clinic as well, blood leaking down his face from a gash on his forehead. “You too?”

“Yep. Maki-senpai?” You peer at the wound, slightly worried about how deep it looks.

“Panda-senpai ,” he corrects, sighing as he wipes a line of blood dripping down just above his eyelid. “You?”

“Gojo-sensei.” You answer, suddenly realizing that you should have brought the entire tissue box with you, considering how much your nose is bleeding. “He really doesn’t go easy during training, does he?”

Fushiguro scoffs as he slows down his pace to match yours. “And the worst thing is that he laughs while he’s doing it. It’s horrible.”

“Tell me about it. And to be honest, Panda-senpai might look all cute and fluffy, but I think there’s 5 tons of metal inside all that stuffing.”

“...I think I heard Principal Yaga mention that Panda-senpai’s claws are made out of titanium once.”

“You’re kidding.”

The clinic door squeaks as it slides open, and you peek your head in ever so slightly. Megumi’s head hovers over yours, and you squat a little bit lower to accommodate his height. The school clinic is dark except for a small lamp turned on in the corner, on Shouko-san’s desk.

“Shouko-san …?

“What is it?”

You yelp in surprise as you hear her voice from behind, turning around suddenly and accidentally elbowing Fushiguro in the stomach on instinct. 

“Oh my god- I’m so sorry, are you okay!?”

Fushiguro groans as he sinks to his knees, keeling over while clutching his stomach with his hands.

Shouko-san looks at you with her eyes wide, and then at Fushiguro.

At you, and then at Fushiguro.

“Oh, it’s you two again.”

“‘You two’?”

“‘Again’?”

Chapter Text

“[L/N]!”

You yell in shock as Kugisaki and Itadori pop up out of nowhere, shouting your name in unison. They show up out of nowhere just as you turn to enter the common area of the dorms, eyes wide and eyebrows furrowed as they cornered you.

Their expressions and body language are the exact same, a mischievous glint in their eyes and a wicked smile on their face as they stare you down -- the same look they share whenever a horrible idea gets into their heads.

A bad feeling fills your stomach, and you laugh as you slowly inch away. “Uh, I just remembered there’s something I have to--”

“No you don’t.” You let out another warbled yell as Kugisaki grabs your wrist and starts dragging you down the hall. “We just had midterms yesterday, so there’s no assignments this weekend. And if you were going to the city, I’d know.”

Itadori gives you a clap on the back before grabbing your other wrist and yanking you further. “Don’t worry, it’ll be fun!”

“Wait, what? What’ll be fun? What’s happening?” You try and lean your entire body backwards, but to no avail against their combined strength. You feel like an unwilling dog being taken on a walk, being dragged all the way across the courtyard into the training building -- attempts at escaping rendered useless as the scraping of your heels against the gravel only serves to grind the soles of your shoes down.

Despite your pleas for an explanation and outright confusion, the pit in your stomach somehow manages to sink even deeper as you arrive at their destination in front of a random training hall -- to find Fushiguro and Gojo-sensei already waiting.

“What’s going on?” There’s already a frown on Fushiguro’s face, but it only grows deeper as Kugisaki and Itadori drag you over. 

You rub your wrists, letting out a nervous laugh at having been dragged all the way over. “Yeah, what was so important that I had to be kidnapped here for?”

“Great question!” A sly grin makes its way across Gojo-sensei’s face, and he claps his hand together as he begins explaining the new training (torture) method he’s come up with. “You’ve all had plenty of individual training done on your own time, but aside from the Goodwill Event, I realized that you’ve never actually gotten the chance to train together as a team.”

Kugisaki lets out a thoughtful hum, giving the person next to her a nasty side-eye. “I wonder why?”

“Hey, how is that my fault?” Itadori gapes at her accusation, a finger pointed at himself as he stares at her wide-eyed. “Gojo-sensei was the one that kept me hidden!”

“A~nyways,” Gojo-sensei steps in between the two of them, placing a hand on their heads and ruffling their hair. “We never got to do some team bonding before, so we’re doing it now! Megumi, [F/N], you ready?”

“What?”

“Huh?”

Before you can protest, the door to the training room is kicked open, and you’re picked up by the back of your collar and thrown in. You yelp as you fall into the room, knees and palms slamming against the wooden floor as you stop yourself from falling on your face.

The door behind you slams closed.

The door behind you slams closed.

The sound of footsteps walking away, curses flying out from under his breath.

The sound of snorts and laughter from the other side of the door.

“Don’t bother trying to get out.”

“Don’t bother trying to get out! I’ll give you a hint, nothing’s going to happen until one of you confesses…” You barely hear the end of the sentence, jumbling memories and past fears rearing their ugly head as you squeeze your eyes closed. 

It’s dark.

It’s cold.

It’s scary.

The pain from falling on the floor suddenly flares up, jolts of pain striking up your legs and arms as you fall to your elbows.

It hurts…

You open your eyes to pitch-black darkness, unable to see even your fingers in front of your face. It’s all too familiar -- the darkness, the cold, the pain.

“I’m… sorry…” Apology after apology tumbles out of your mouth as you squeeze your eyes shut once more, tears slipping out as you press your forehead against the floor. 

“Don’t bother me like that again.”

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry…”

You’ve become naive. The years of warmth and comfort have softened you, made you forget the mistakes you’ve yet to fix. You’ve grown complacent, selfish.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry,”

The floor wasn’t always this cold. At least back then, you were lucky enough to have newspapers and spare magazines beneath your knees.

You suck in a sharp breath, trembling as your face and hands become wet with tears. You try not to make any more noise as that’ll only make him even angrier, letting out shaky breaths as you try to slow your breathing.

I’m sorry. I won’t do it again. I’m sorry.

“at-”

It’s your fault. You’ve learned your lesson.

“-kay?”

You’ll make sure not to do it again once you-- when you-- if you get out. 

“Hey-”

You’ve made another mistake, and you need to pay the pri

Warmth envelops your hands and you freeze. 

“Are you okay?” Fushiguro’s voice drifts into your ears, past the blood thundering through your eardrums. His hands are placed over yours, and though you don’t dare to open your eyes yet, you can feel his breath slowly fanning onto your head as he speaks.

You try to respond, willing your voice to steady and say ‘yes’ , but all that comes out is a choked sob.

“I’m here too. And we’ll get out of whatever training exercise this is.” His hand slowly lifts off yours as he moves to investigate the room, and you feel yourself panic as the warmth of his hand begins to leave yours.

“Wait--”  Your hand reaches out to grabs his again, heart almost jumping out of your chest as you keep your eyes shut. “Sorry, I just…” Your voice trails off as you get up, hand still holding onto his.

Fushiguro lets out a cough from somewhere next to you. “...It’s okay.”

The two of you stand there for a bit in silence, neither of you making a move until Fushiguro’s voice breaks through. “There’s writing on the walls.”

“...Is there?” You reach out a hand to glide against what’s in front of you, reaching a smooth surface. There are characters written along its stretch, mantras and curses that repeat itself as you continue tracing a path downwards.

“It’s probably what hides the exit, and keeps the room sealed.” He lets out a groan, tugging a bit on your hand as he moves around to investigate. “...Sorry. If there was a light source somewhere, then I would’ve been able to summon something to help us get out…”

“No, no, it’s okay.” You rush to disagree, eyes finally opening as you attempt to reassure him. After some time adjusting to the dark, you can just faintly see his figure looking around the room to your right. “I should be the one apologizing -- if I just had some paper, I could try…” Your voice trails off, remembering that all of your talismans and kami were still in your school uniform, in your room. 

“Wait. Is paper all you need?”

You turn to your right, hesitation seeping into your voice. “Yes, but I still--”

You pause as you hear Fushiguro shuffling around, reaching for something in his pockets before opening your hand and placing something in the center of your palm. 

Squinting, you bend down to see… a paper star.

“I kept one with me.” There’s a hint of nervousness in his voice as he wraps your fingers around it, hand enveloping yours. “For good luck,” he explains, and despite the fear and confusion that continues to fill your head, you muster a smile.

“...I’m glad.” You slowly unravel the paper star until it’s a long strip of paper, pressing it against the wall and taking a shaky breath. 

“With corners, the four walls stand. To let those leave the box which is filled to the brim…”

“Please change. Please change.”

“Listen to my words, and become paper.”

The walls rumble as it slowly turns, black void rippling like droplets in water as the curse breaks. Slowly yet surely, they morph into sheets of paper covering the walls until they flutter down to reveal the true room hidden behind it, sheets of white cascading down until the cold floor is covered in a blank layer that hides the wooden boards beneath it. You fall to your knees, out of breath as tears start to stream down your face again -- whether it’s from your breakdown or from overusing your cursed technique, you can’t tell.

You can just barely hear the sound of Fushiguro summoning his divine dog amidst the blood pulsing through your ears as you catch your breath, and it only takes seconds before the door in front of you is broken down.

Sunlight filters into the room and your breath catches in your throat.

“Hey, I thought I said to--”

You run.

You race past a confused Gojo-sensei, Kugisaki, and Itadori, and run.

Down the hallway. Past the entrance. Through the courtyard. You breathe in the fresh air and continue running with no destination in mind, thinking only of getting away from the room.

Anywhere, anywhere is fine. Anywhere but there.

By the time you’re out of breath and can run no longer, you find yourself at the exit of the school -- its large, torii gate signalling the massive decline of stairs that leads down the side of Mount Mushiro. You plop down on the top of the steps, pressing your tear-stained face to your knees as you catch your breath, trying to focus on anything but your thoughts.

It’s only been around forty minutes since the whole ordeal has happened, and yet it feels like hours have passed. It doesn’t help that you’ve expended almost all the cursed energy you have, because breaking that curse has likely put you out of commission for the next week or so.

Breathe in through the nose, out through the mouth. You practice the meditation techniques your grandfather taught you ever since they regained custody, taking deep breaths and letting yourself listen to the sounds around you.

The tree leaves flutter as the wind whistles by, tousling your hair as it blows past. You let yourself focus on the birds chirping nearby, relaxing as their song travels on the wind in a light chorus.

“Woof.”

...That’s not a bird.

You raise your head slowly, turning to see Fushiguro’s black Divine Dog a little ways behind you. It barks again, sensing your hesitation, and then slowly begins to pad over to where you’re sitting. 

“...Hello,” you whisper as it nears, carefully making its way towards your side. “Where’s your— oh!” You lift your arms in surprise as it squeezes its head under your arms, laying its head on your lap. You watch as it makes itself comfortable, front paws tucking under your legs as it lies down on its stomach. 

Its eyes lock onto yours, golden eyes fluttering before shutting closed and letting out a low whine. Its tail flicks back and forth to your side, and you slowly put your hand on its head, raking your fingers through its fur. 

It's incredibly soft, you realize, and you feel yourself melt as you continue petting its head. You could do this for hours. “I wonder if your owner would get mad at me for this.”

“Why would I get mad?”

You turn your head, careful this time to not disturb the dog dozing on your lap, to see Fushiguro making his way over. You quickly turn away, lowering your head in hopes that your hair will hide your tear-stained face. 

“He really likes you,” Fushiguro comments as he makes his way to your other side, sitting down on the top step next to you and giving his dog a small scritch on the head. You hum in agreement as the shikigami’s tail wags faster in response.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Fushiguro takes a deep breath from your side, wringing his hands as he speaks. “You don’t have to if you don’t want to, but…” His voice trails off as he looks off to the distance.

You consider his words, hand pausing in thought at his offer. But when the dog in your lap lets out another low whine, you resume petting. 

“...My mother died giving birth to me.”

“...I’m sorry.”

“No, it’s okay.” You shake your head as you decide what to say next. “I know it wasn’t really my fault but… My grandparents loved her a lot. My dad even more, so…” You let out a shaky breath as your hand starts to tremble. “He wasn’t very happy when I was born.”

You feel guilty, pouring out your issues and fears to the person you wanted to hide them from the most, but the comfortable silence surrounding you both encourages you to continue.

“I was raised by my grandparents for the first few years of my life, with my dad stopping by every few months or so. Eventually they decided that I should at least have some relationship with him, so they convinced him to take me in and raise me like a proper father should. It… didn’t turn out well.”

“At first, it was just… awkward. But over time, I just turned into a nuisance. I-- he would always say that I was holding him back, from moving on, from getting a new family, from getting things done… so he’d…” The words catch in your throat, the last part of the sentence hanging heavily in the air. “...Yeah.”

“One day my grandparents came over for a surprise visit, were confused when there was a door with a heavy lock on it, and… the rest is history.” You wiggle your fingers in the air to try and clear the heavy mood, laughing nervously. “Now here I am at Jujutsu Tech, still scared of the dark.”

You bow your head in fear, guilty that you’ve spoken too much. Nobody likes a person who overshares, much less one that pushes their issues onto others. “Sorry for talking so much,” you whisper, squeezing your eyes closed. 

This time it’s Fushiguro’s turn to disagree, and he quickly shakes his head. “No, I’m… glad you shared it with me.” His shoulder rises and falls against yours, and you hear him take a deep breath of his own. “My mom died shortly after I was born, and my dad went off somewhere afterwards and disappeared too, so -- I guess I get it. Dads kinda suck.”

“You can say that again.” 

You lift your head to see him still looking off into the distance, his chin propped up with one hand. There’s a train nearby at the bottom of the mountain that’s just left the station, but his gaze goes farther than that -- looking past all the hills and trees towards something in the far distance.

You wonder what he’s looking for.

“Do you miss him? Your dad, I mean.”

“No.”

His quick answer catches you off guard as he turns to look at you, eyes meeting yours. “I don’t even remember what he looks like, so as far as I know he could be dead in a dumpster somewhere. Not that I care.”

“I wish I could do that.” You whisper, envious of his bluntness and nonchalance. “I guess in the end, I still… miss him. He hurt me, I know, but in the end he was still my dad. I hate what he did to me, but I still hope he’s doing okay. I don’t want to see him again, yet I wish him the best.” You frown at the contradictions that fill your thoughts, polar opposite beliefs that clash together whenever you remember your childhood. Forgive, or forget? You’ve spent the past few years trying to forget to no avail -- maybe it was time to give forgiveness a try.

“You don’t have to forgive him if you don’t want to.” As if reading your mind, Fushiguro raises an eyebrow as you look at him in surprise. “Not everybody deserves it, anyways.”

“...That’s true.”

Such a simple idea, yet one you hadn’t considered before -- and how come? Maybe you were stuck in your thoughts again, focusing too much on others before taking even yourself into account. 

It’s strange, how one sentence could change your point of view so much. Maybe you have been naive, deliberating so much on the past that you forgot to consider the possibilities of the future. 

You wonder what it has in store -- for you, and for the others. 

“Thank you for everything, Fushiguro.” 

For helping. For listening. For staying by my side.

He doesn’t respond, but the way he slowly puts his hand over yours is enough of an answer. Warmth blooms across your chest at the movement, and you take the chance to rest your head on his shoulder. His body immediately tenses as you do so, and you’re just about to lift your head back up and apologize when he lets out a deep breath and relaxes.

And as he unwinds, you let yourself close your eyes.

There’s more you want to say, litanies of “thank you”s and confessions stuck in your throat, unable to make their way out into the air. But as you rest against his shoulder and slowly intertwine your fingers with his, you realize that there’s nothing else you need to say.

Just his presence is enough. 

The calming silence is punctuated with the sound of wind making its way down the mountain, carrying with it the rattle of falling leaves as the seasons begin to turn. The birds’ songs are quieter than they were before, but still blossoming through the trees -- beautiful, and free.

Thank you for staying with me.

Thank you for being with me.

I’m so glad I’m not alone.

Chapter Text

Hip, hip

The soft guitar echoes against the rumbling of the train car, helping to block out the noise of wind outside and static-filled train announcements inside.

When you’re on a holiday,

You can’t find the words to say,

All the things that come to you,

And I want to feel it too

It’s strange having music coming in only through one ear, but you had forgotten your headphone-splitters in your room this morning and had to make do. The cord from your right ear sinks down between the both of you, with the left earbud cord connected to Megumi.

On an island in the sun,

We'll be playin' and havin' fun,

And it makes me feel so fine

I can't control my brain

He shifts his seat to rest his head on your shoulder, spiky hair tickling the side of your neck and ears as he closes his eyes and lets out a sigh. 

Hip, hip

“Tired?” You ask.

“Mm . Sorry, is it uncomfortable?” Megumi’s eyes flit open and he moves to get up, only for you to grab his arm and yank him back down.

“Of course not,” you say, lacing your fingers in between his and feeling him sink deeper into your shoulder. 

When you're on a golden sea

You don't need no memory

Just a place to call your own

As we drift into the zone

You hum along as you listen along to the lyrics, gazing at the light of the setting sun through the train window. “Megumi, do you know what the lyrics mean?”

His thumb rubs soft circles along the back of your hand, a steady reminder that he’s still awake and listening. “No. But does it matter?”

A small laugh escapes your mouth at that, and you make sure to keep the shaking of your shoulders to a minimum as you feel him smile against your shoulder. 

“No, I guess it doesn’t.”

On an island in the sun

We'll be playin' and havin' fun

And it makes me feel so fine

I can't control my brain

It’s rare for you to see him so relaxed, and even rarer that he’s comfortable enough to show it in public. You glance down, watching as the sunset makes his black hair seem golden in the light, flecks of gold glinting off of his eyelash and across his face.

We'll run away together

We'll spend some time forever

We'll never feel that anymore

Hip, hip

Closing your eyes, you tilt your head to rest it on his.

Chapter Text

The sound of rain tugs you awake, falling droplets causing you to stir as they echo against the roof. 

You open your eyes slowly. Sleep still threatens to pull you back as you peek through heavy eyelids, searching for the warmth missing from your side.

Megumi is just a little bit away near the edge of the bed, phone screen on the lowest brightness possible as he taps through. A small groan escapes your mouth as you glance tiredly at his back, considering how far away he is.

Too far.

There’s not much space on his dorm bed, and despite your hazy, sleep-ridden mind, you reach out a hand to try and pull him a little bit closer.

...Until a new idea springs into your mind. 

You move your arm back to place your hands on the bed in front of you, slowly but surely pushing yourself up in an attempt to stay as silent as possible. You move a little bit to lean over his shoulder...

And wrap your lips around his earlobe, giving it a slight tug.

It’s admittedly a little bit disappointing when he doesn’t make some sort of noise in surprise, but the way he drops his phone flat on the bed and whips around in shock is good enough.

You smile at his reaction, plopping back down on the pillow and giving him a tired smile. “Morning.”

His hand goes to his ear, a slight blush painting his cheeks as he touches it. “...Morning.”

You inch forward to wrap your arms over his shoulders, wiggling your face comfortably into the crook of his neck and letting out a sigh of content at the return of your human heater.

“You’re going back to sleep?” Megumi asks, his arm sliding around your waist to pull you just a bit closer. “But it’s already morning.”

“Just 5 more minutes....” You mumble into his neck, burrowing closer against his body as the rainfall outside gets heavier.

He lets out a small laugh at that, the rumble in his chest a comforting sensation as the warmth from it spreads across your body, all the way to the tip of your toes. His other arm moves up to the back of your head, fingers stroking through your hair as he places a soft kiss on the top of your head. “I’ll wake you up at 9.”

You hum in agreement, despite not knowing how much sleep that will get you. But with the rain setting a steady rhythm against the roof and Megumi’s faint breathing like a soft lullaby, you decide that some things are better off unknown.

Chapter Text

“...You glue them on?”

You laugh as you examine a packet of false eyelashes in front of you. “Of course, how else would you put them on?”

Megumi leans over your shoulder, wrinkling his nose at the price before turning away. “I dunno. But doesn’t that hurt?”

You hum in consideration as you put the packet back on the shelf, deeming it an unsuitable gift. “I don’t think so? I’ve never actually worn them, but Kugisaki doesn’t really seem bothered when she takes them off.”

“Her pain tolerance is pretty high, though.”

“True. Hey, how much do you think this costs?” You move down the aisle, picking up a container of anti-aging cream and covering the price tag with your hand as you show it to him.

Megumi squints as he examines the packaging. “4000 yen.”

“ Pfft!” You smile as you slide your hand away. “6500.”

“I give up.” He sighs, rubbing an eye with his hands. “And I thought we decided on a 3000 yen limit for Christmas gifts?”

“Yeah, but…” You gaze around the store, trying to think what makeup set could possibly be worthwhile, especially for Kugisaki. After all, you’ve seen her shop at Gucci — her taste is exquisite, but the stipends that Jujutsu Tech gives her probably don’t last long.

As you make your way to a different aisle, your search is screeched to a halt by a shining screen at the end of the lipstick section. A smile bursts out on your face. 

You wave Megumi over, watching as he ambles towards you in confusion. He blinks as you grab his arm, pulling him in view of the camera as you throw up a peace sign. The screen takes a second to recognize your faces, and then…

Click!

There’s so many things wrong with the photo that shows up—from the way fake eyelashes are accidentally pasted on your eyebrows, to the purple eyeshadow covering both of your faces. There’s bright blue lipstick plastered on, dark red blush, and even winged eyeliner to top it all off. You don’t even want to talk about the contouring.

“ Oh my god.” You cover your mouth with a hand, stifling your laughter as you rush to input your phone number onto the screen to save the picture. 

“No—“ Megumi’s hands cover your own as tries to stop you from getting the photo, a grin breaking out on his face despite his actions. “You are not—“

A large box appears on the screen. [Your image has been sent!]

You smile as you set the picture as your lock screen, turning your phone to show him the photo in all its glory.

“Come on, can’t you use a different photo as your wallpaper?” He groans, blocking the screen with his hands as he pulls you away from the aisle. 

You give him a light elbow on the waist and shrug, locking your phone and putting it away in your bag. “I think it’s cute! Especially since we don’t have that many photos together, anyways.”

Megumi doesn’t respond after that, making you frown as you reach over to grab his hand, intertwining your fingers with his. 

“It’s okay, you know. Doesn’t really bother me.” You try and comfort him, squeezing his hand. They’re cold, you realize, and wrap your fingers just a little bit tighter to try and warm them up. “What happened to your hands?”

He blinks at you for a second before giving a small shrug. “Forgot to wear my gloves when we left.”

You hum in acknowledgement, not necessarily content with his answer, but not wanting to pry further. In the end you decide on a moisturizing set from Tatcha, and exit the store to continue the search for gifts.

By the time you’re both done with Christmas shopping, the sky has turned dark and the holiday lights have flickered on, adorning the busy streets with their bright glow. On the way out of the shopping center, you stop in front of the heart-shaped lights to take a photo of the mall’s main Christmas attraction—the Daiba Memorial tree.

“Oh, it’s different this year.” Megumi points at the light fixtures with his chin, looking at the pink heart decorated with stars. 

“Really? What was it last year?” You tilt your head, watching as a couple poses in front of the lights to take a photo.

“I think it was a crescent moon last year, and then a star the year before that. Oh, excuse me.” He walks towards the couple as they finish taking their photos, holding out his phone. “Could you take a picture for us?”

You stare at him for a moment in confusion, wondering why he would need somebody else to take a photo of the tree for him -- until he pulls you towards the center of the heart and wraps an arm around your waist.

A smile can’t help but break out on your face as you turn to look at the camera. “I thought I told you it was okay?”

His arm gives a slight squeeze around your waist, fingers tapping lightly on your stomach. “I’m just doing this so you can set a different photo as your lock screen.”

You let out a small laugh at that, knowing that his reason is anything but as you slide your arm around his back as well. “Thank you.”

“Okay, say cheese!”

brb exorcising curses

[6:24PM] >>>You: [IMG_4157.jpg]

[6:44PM] >>>itadori: LOL

[6:44PM] >>>kugisaki: OMG

[6:44PM] >>>kugisaki: LMAO

[6:45PM] >>>kugisaki: ngl that eyeliner kinda slaps tho

[6:45PM] >>>itadori: fushiguro lookin good :thumbs_up:

[6:45PM] >>>itadori: brb sending this to gojosensei

[6:46PM] >>>kugisaki: LOLLLLL

[6:46PM] >>>fushiguro: No

[6:46PM] >>>fushiguro: dont u dare

[6:46PM] >>>fushiguro: itadori

[6:46PM] >>>fushiguro: wtf

[6:47PM] >>>You: AAA ITADORI 

[6:47PM] >>>You: PLEASE

[6:47PM] >>>You: DONT GIVE HIM MORE BLACKMAIL????

[6:47PM] >>>itadori: .....................oops

[6:47PM] >>>itadori: dw he said y’all look cute

[6:48PM] >>>fushiguro: is that all he said or.

[6:51PM] >>>You: [IMG_4158.jpg]

[6:51PM] >>>itadori: awwww

[6:51PM] >>>itadori: wholesome

[6:52PM] >>>kugisaki: WOW

[6:52PM] >>>kugisaki: WAY TO FLEX

[6:52PM] >>>You: :))))))

[6:52PM] >>>kugisaki: We Get It ur dating omg

[6:53PM] >>>You: ajkdfhajlsfhsak

[6:53PM] >>>You: odaiba was pretty ok!!!!

[6:53PM] >>>kugisaki: bruh Some People Are Single On Christmas

[6:53PM] >>>fushiguro: [IMG_2193.jpg]

[6:53PM] >>>You: ???

[6:53PM] >>>kugisaki: ?????

[6:53PM] >>>itadori: ?????????????????

[6:54PM] >>>fushiguro: the dude who took a pic for us

[6:54PM] >>>fushiguro: also took a selfie???

[6:54PM] >>>You: LMAO WHAT

[6:55PM] >>>kugisaki: WHY

[6:55PM] >>>itadori: LOL he’s even doing the peace sign

[6:55PM] >>>itadori: man def did it on purpose

[6:55PM] >>>fushiguro: i dont even know lol

[6:57PM] >>>kugisaki: btw

[6:57PM] >>>kugisaki: nice tatcha bag ur holding lol

[6:57PM] >>>You: HUH

[6:57PM] >>>You: U DONT SEE ANYTHING

[6:57PM] >>>You: idk what ur talking about <.<

Chapter Text

“Achoo!”

“Bless you.”

A sniffle. “Hahchoo!”

“Bless you.” Kugisaki says it, this time.

“Ah--” Megumi opens his mouth to sneeze again, and you look up from your homework to give Itadori and Kugisaki a knowing glance.

“ --choo!”

Itadori looks up from the sofa, staring at Megumi. “Dude, I’ve ran out of blessings for you.”

You follow suit, standing up and sliding him a box of tissues. “Are you okay? You don’t sound too good either.”

“‘m fine.” He mumbles, gratefully taking the box of tissues and blowing his nose. “It’s probably just allergies.”

Kugisaki looks outside the window. “But it’s the middle of winter…?”

Megumi responds with another sneeze, and the frown on your face deepens. You lean over the table to put a hand on his forehead, but he clicks his tongue as you do so, ducking and shooing away your hand as you reach over to him. “Hey, your hand’s too cold.”

“They’re not cold, you’re just burning up!” You place your hand against your own forehead, shocked at the difference in heat. “You need to get some rest. What are you still out here for?”

“I’m fine, it’ll go away soon.” He turns away as he scoots his chair back, face tinted with red -- whether it’s from his fever or from embarrassment, you can’t tell.

A part of you feels like you should be used to it at this point -- the way he always seems to put others before himself, barely giving himself a smidge of concern compared to the diligence he shows to others. It’s not that he can’t be selfish (you’ve watched him dupe Kugisaki and Itadori into paying for his meal thousands of times), but he just tends to be selfless at the most unfortunate moments.

Soft probing and words of encouragement won’t work on him when it comes to things like this. You’ve made up your mind. “Itadori, you grab the back of his chair. Kugisaki, we’ll both grab a side in front.”

They both stand up from their seats, raising their hands to their head as they salute. “Yes, ma’am!”

“What are you… HEY--” Megumi’s eyebrows raise as he leaves to get off his chair, but as always, Itadori is faster, shoving him back onto the chair as you and Kugisaki each take a side to the front.

You stumble as Itadori lifts up the back of the chair a bit too fast, causing Megumi to yell as he almost falls off. “The fuck? Are you guys insane!?”

You can’t help but laugh as he balances on the chair, hands gripping the backrest as his eyes dart all over the room. He’s clearly looking for an escape route, with the way he keeps on looking around in circles for a place to jump off reminding you of a puppy that’s chasing its tail. “Just think of it as a royal sedan!”

Kugisaki’s eyes light up at that, a menacing grin forming on her face. “Yeah Fushiguro, you’re getting the royal treatment here. Enjoy it while you can!” 

“Alrighty, all passengers have boarded the Itadori-Kugisaki-[L/N] train bound for Fushiguro’s room. Departing… now!” Itadori whoops as he takes off, and both you and Kugisaki yelp as you try and keep up with him as all four of you bound down the hall into his room, pleas for him to slow down quickly morphing into laughter as you skid into his room. 

Megumi yells for the three of you to stop, but his loud pleas only go unheard as the three of you unceremoniously dump him on his bed with an abrupt plop.

You drop your side of the chair, sitting down on the ground to catch your breath from laughing after catapulting him onto his bed. Recovering from your giggles, you cough as you get back up. “Really, get some rest. I’ll get you some hot tea and bring your dinner to your room later.”

He rolls his eyes as he sits up on the edge of his bed, rubbing the back of his neck. “I can take care of myself, you know.”

Kugisaki clicks her tongue. “Says the guy who we had to chuck back into his room.”

“Yeah, just let us take care of you, man. And if you’re sick...” Itadori looks over to you as well, putting up puppy eyes. “you’ll make us ochazuke too, right?”

You frown. “But you’re not sick…?”

To your side, Kugisaki suddenly starts letting out a fit of coughs. “Oops, suddenly I’m -- cough -- feeling kind of sick -- cough -- from carrying Fushiguro.” She looks up from coughing into her shoulder, shooting you a wink. “So you’re handling dinner for us?"

These guys…!

You return Kugisaki’s wink with a smile of your own, pulling out a talisman from your sleeve. “You know, Shoko-san told me about this healing trick I could try through my fire talismans. I’ve never gotten to test it out though, so I’m so glad you and Itadori are willing…”

The wink on her face freezes as she slowly begins to back away, letting out a nervous laugh. “Hahaha…” She grabs Itadori by the collar, yanking him out of the room with her despite his dissent. “Itadori, guess we’re on grocery shift tonight!”

You giggle as you put away the talisman, watching as they disappear down the hallway. There’s no way you could heal them through your talismans, but it’s true that Shoko-san has been trying to give you more tips on activating a Reverse Cursed Technique.

...Not like it’s been successful at all, though.

You hum as you go to Megumi’s doorway, looking at the dish rack he has hanging on the wall. You pick out a bowl and a cup, pulling them out and turning to give him a questioning look. “Are these okay?”

He groans, flopping back down on the bed and rolling over as he cocoons himself in blankets. “‘s fine. Go ahead.”

“Alrighty.” You stack the cup inside the bowl, carrying it with one hand while you exit and close the dorm door with the other. “I’ll be back with some tea in a sec.”

He mumbles something just as you close the door, and you just barely hear the phrases “thank you”.

You smile as the door clicks closed. Megumi likes ginger, so you’ll probably try to brew some ginger lemon tea for him… there’s plenty of honey in the kitchen, so a dash of that will help. 

Oh, you should probably tell Kugisaki and Itadori to buy some extra daikon while they’re at it.