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You know they don’t care about you
“I know…” Tommy whispered as silent tears rolled down his cheeks. He was laying on his bed, staring at the ceiling as the voices taunted him again. They always did.
You’re so annoying
Tommy started sobbing softly, bringing his hands up to his face in an attempt to wipe away the ever-flowing tears, but to no avail. He was annoying. He shouted and insulted others. He swears so much. He talks so much — too much. Maybe he shouldn’t even talk. Shouldn’t even exist
They hate you
“I’m sorry,” He choked out, squeezing his eyes tightly shut. He whimpered as he curled into a ball. He’s sorry, he’s sorry, he’s sorry, he’s sorry- Forgive him, for whatever he did.
He felt like he was slipping.
Slipping-
Into-
The-
Darkness—
The loud discord notification ping that came from Tommy’s phone jolted him out of his thoughts. He gasped loudly at the sudden sound and abrupt absence of the voices. His face donned a pained expression with fresh tear stains. He struggled for a while to move before finally finding the strength to reach his hand out to grab onto his phone. The bright screen contrasted heavily with the dark, dim room Tommy was in.
After lowering the brightness, he tapped onto the notification, going straight to Discord since his face ID had already unlocked his phone.
‘Wilbur
Hey Toms!
The stream is starting in a bit
Coming?’
Tommy couldn’t even reach for his phone the first time, do you think he could stand up, get to his pc, switch on the lights, get on discord there, join a call, join a stream, and put up a “show” with his annoying persona? The answer’s no.
‘sorry big man
got something going on today'
Apologise, ungrateful bastard
There it was.
'Wilbur is typing...
His breath hitched, his finger frozen at the send button.
'sorry'
He quickly typed out before Wilbur could send whatever he was typing.
'No worries!
If you have anything you want to talk about, I'm here! :)'
Tommy didn't deserve Wilbur. He was such a good friend, kind and caring to everyone he meets. So unlike Tommy -- rude, brash, loud, annoying. He could go on and on about himself but didn't have the strength to.
He sighed and switched off his phone, throwing it somewhere on the bed.
You should've killed yourself when you had the chance
Tommy shakily inhaled, silently agreeing with the voice. He knew. He should've. But he didn't. He's a coward, a "pussy" as he would quote his persona.
He rolled up his long sleeves, looking at his arms and shoulders. Littered with both old and new cut marks. Both brown and red angry lines stared at him. In parallel lines, slit across, diagonally, vertically — all together in a messed up, beautiful work of art. Heck, there were even some blood spots dotted around, some smudged and some newly produced out of the torn skin.
Tommy didn't know if he should smile, cry, laugh, or breakdown.
Maybe he would quote Wilbur just this once. Not Will from Brighton, but Wilbur Soot from the Dream SMP. What about Tubbo? Not Toby his best friend, but Tubbo from the Dream SMP.
My Unfinished Symphony
Forever Unfinished
What am I without you?
"Yourself."