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For some reason, he couldn’t shake the thought. It was constantly lingering in the back of his head, when he hung out with Uraraka, Iida, Todoroki, or anyone who aligned themself with the quote on quote, “Dekusquad.” Midoriya didn’t understand how it even happened, why would anyone name a group of people after him? Or simply why did they have to use Deku? The Bakusquad goes by Kacchan’s last name, and yeah, Deku sounds better than Midori, but he’s still pretty iffy on the name.
Izuku sighed as he leaned against the edge of his bed, staring out his balcony, the third floor was the best place he would have asked for his room to be put, it was in the general middle and not too far from the ground but also not too far away. He could easily use the staircase to get to the roof or just climb the balconies if he got bored or locked from the stairs. Aizawa had caught him a few times, sitting on the roof, staring at the stars, yearning for the ground. It wasn’t healthy, he knew that, but he wasn’t gonna tell anyone. If it came out that Class 1-A’s “Sunshine boy” wanted nothing to do with life, everything would change.
He was better, and he knew it wasn’t gonna last forever but he didn’t expect it to hit like a truck. One moment, he’s sitting with Eri, happily showing her how to make Caramel Apples, and the next he just wants to curl up in bed. She had said something his brain registered but his ears hadn't. Whatever caused this is completely unknown to him, and that was a dangerous game of Russian roulette he didn’t wanna be a part of.
Everything started to just happen in a blink of an eye after that, it was blurry and he wasn’t aware of anything. He knew he did this, his body did this, but it wasn’t truly him. He rubbed his temple, trying to remove the growing headache as he tried to focus on the stars. They seemed to blink and flash, some would fade into the darkness and disappear only to reappear moments later. They danced in chains and dug into the sky as it got louder.
Midoriya moved to his feet, restless as he wandered his room. His pacing was a go-to fidget when he wasn’t sure what to do. In the last two weeks, his brain has turned every moment into a learning situation. Pay attention! Show them you’re listening! You are useless when you can not help others! It was a constant pounding that threatened to burst at the littlest shift. Walking to the training fields had been enough for him to realize just how close he was to losing it.
He had been dissociating as they walked, all he remembered was suddenly waking up to having her tapping his shoulder, worried expression clear and untamed as she spoke. “Midoriya? You with me?” He blinked a bit as she spoke and simply nodded his head with a smile plastered across his face.
“I’m here Momo, sorry I zoned out there for a minute.” He responded with a little chuckle. Izuku knew it was fake, but she didn’t seem to notice it as he followed her. In the end, he sprained his ankle, he’d dissociated again in the fight, not even reacting to the pain.
He shook his head as he continued to pace, basically burning a hole in the wood floor as he moved. His eyes glazed to the connecting bathroom, he had a medicine cabinet, everyone had one so what made him special? He had diagnosed medication that could easily be used for what he wants it for, not its intended purpose. He leaned over the sink noticing the water that dripped down, how long had he been crying? His hands started to wipe the tears away but more continued to fall as he continued to try and get them to stop.
He wanted to stop all of it, crying was a sign something was wrong with him, and he wasn’t allowed to cry anymore. All Might didn’t want him to cry anymore, he had to keep that promise, even if he couldn’t handle it. He had started to shake a little, moving from leaning into the sink to sitting on the floor leaning against the door. His line of sight moved to the black band around his wrist, a safety precaution he was forced to wear. It had a tracker and something to track his heart rate. After causing so much trouble Aizawa had forced him to wear it for his own safety. He didn’t fight it, no reason to, since the black-haired pro would have added it to his hero costume and his uniform.
The red light was flashing, showing his distressed status as he continued to shake and hug himself. Out of all the times for him to break, it had to be in the middle of the night, he was just gonna be waking Aizawa. That's not very good timing, all it’s going to do is upset him. He curled in on himself more as he whipped some tears away, still unable to get them to stop. The salt was revolting in his mouth, all he wanted to do was simply curl up and stop. He was still holding the pill bottle to his chest in front of him not hearing the sound of a key card in his door.
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Aizawa didn’t know what to think. The Problem Child’s attitude had completely changed out of nowhere. It was confusing, he saw the moment it happened, Eri had simply been rambling on about one of her new experiences since she started going to public school. He’s seen someone snap before, but for some reason, he couldn’t identify it this time. He’d gotten so used to seeing Midoriya with a smile and a positive attitude his brain seemed to ignore the obvious signs.
He got more reckless, distracted, and borderline dead at this point. He sprained his ankle and didn’t bat an eye, he knew the kid had a high pain tolerance but that was a bit much. He’d at least look uncomfortable, or tear up a little from the worried sounds of his classmates but no, he wasn’t… Present. He carried himself the same, same smile, and the same movements, it was all still his student but he wasn’t in there.
What hit the nail on the head was when he remembered something they had talked about at the beginning of the year, mental health. Midoriya had come forward about this, he had admitted to a lot of negative thoughts that went far past the healthy limit if you could even call it that. They had ended up scheduling a couple of appointments with Hound Dog who pointed out what was affecting him. The fact the green-haired boy had ADHD and lacked a sense of self-care didn’t surprise him, anyone who was surprised clearly didn’t know his Problem Child. His anxiety was obvious, but the trust issues and depression were a bit of a struggle, no one would expect that from such a happy-go-lucky kid, but at least anyone he told would be able to spot it easier.
Nezu insisted on adding a more thorough mental health/state section to any form of health and rescue training. It was smart and not a bad idea in all honesty, but Aizawa couldn’t shake the feeling that his students should all have psych evaluations. Not because they were crazy or anything, but if Midoriya suffers, who’s to say some of his other students don’t?
He had a feeling he was gonna snap, Shota knew full well that Izuku was at his limit. The flinching, the sudden tears he managed to hide pretty well, the look of accidental disappointment that crept into his face during a fight when he wasn’t hurt. His student was doing anything to feel something, he probably spent most of the day in a dissociated state so he tried to involve him.
A bit of hope was in those emerald eyes when he, by his guess, noticed the subject for training last week. He had them fighting quirkless for the next couple of weeks, it was the happiest he’d seen his Problem Child in a while, it wasn’t the fake he’d been blinded by but his actual smile. He was relieved to see it and had originally planned on talking to him tomorrow so he had spent the evening grading papers and their progress. He wasn’t surprised to see Midoriya dominating them with his fighting style when his alarm started to go off.
At first, Aizawa was confused, it was late, probably one maybe two am. None of his students should be up and about, even Iida had the dignity to at least sleep until four. He sat up reluctantly as he pulled his phone over, the couple of his students who he knew struggled with their mental health were encouraged to wear these trackers. Midoriya was the only one of the lot who was forced to wear one, it wasn’t like he hadn’t agreed, in fact, he didn’t show any signs of being against it.
His signal was going off, and his heart rate was up and not in the way he normally saw it, for some reason his student liked late-night Yoga, but Midoriya was in distress. Once again, confusion littered his face, but then he remembered his student’s general state and was quick to his feet. Shota had practically bolted over to the dorms, getting a confused look for Hizashi as he passed his half-asleep husband who was holding a passed-out Eri. The air was cold on his lungs and his skin as he moved. If your student was showing signs of a relapse in their mental state and was suddenly distressed, you’d rush to help too.
Izuku was a good student, while he called him Problem Child he could only hope his student knew it wasn’t meant to be an insult. He had got to his room door, knocking on the cold wood with no response following after the silence. He felt tension at the lack of a response, maybe he was just asleep and Midoriya was having a Nightmare, even so, he could just comfort him, and then they could have a discussion.
He caved in after another minute before pulling out his key card and waving it over the lock, it clicked immediately as he pushed the door open his eyes fell onto the empty completely untouched and made the bed before he drifted over to the bathroom door. He saw the familiar green curly hair and then the shaking figure that possessed it. He gave a quiet sign as he crouched down and looked at his tear-stained face.
“Midoriya? I need to know if you can hear me, kid.” Shota told him as he put a hand up as the boy looked up. His eyes glanced at what he was clutching to his chest, he’d see what it was soon enough, for now, it was best to focus on calming him down. The boy seemed to flinch when he got closer, he put a hand out wanting to take one of his before he asked another question. “Kid, can I touch you? I need to take your hand.” He told him as the boy’s eyes glanced up, making direct contact.
A nod was the only response he needed, he saw his shaky hand move a little closer so he took it, bringing his hand over and putting it against his chest. He took overly deep breaths to extend the importance of it. After a moment, once his gasping had begun to calm down, Izuku dropped what he was holding and shifted to hugging him. He froze at first before moving and putting an arm around him starting to rub his back in a circular motion, his other in the fluffy mess of hair. His eyes moved to look at what he was holding, it was far too dark to be understood or truly seen but, he had a feeling he knew what it was.
The boy was holding his shirt tightly, his gasping had calmed but he was still crying, even if it was very quiet. After a moment he seemed to start to get calmer but the slumping told Aizawa he was falling asleep, he used the hand that had been in his hair to pick up what he had dropped. His blood went cold at what it was, a pill bottle as he expected but he was relieved to find it had a lot of medication inside. That should be how much is left of his new prescription.
Now that Aizawa thought about it, Midoriya had just started this medication a few weeks ago… He got it a day before his sudden change in attitude. Stuff changes on a new medication, but this was drastic and... This Vestra is supposed to help him, not make it worse. He’ll have to see about putting him back on his old stuff with a higher dosage. He pushed it into his pocket before scooping up the luckily sleeping boy.
If it had turned out worse he would have rushed him to the Hospital or seen if Recovery Girl was still on campus, she could pump a stomach. Since he had calmed down and fallen asleep he could just take him to his dorm, for now, Mic wouldn’t mind if he explained what was happening.
Aizawa slipped him onto the couch but his problem child was holding onto his shirt. He sighed in response, moving to pick him up again before sitting down and moving to position him in a comfortable position for them both. He put a hand back in the sleepy curls as he watched the boy snuggle deeper into him. He gave a little sigh as Hizashi came out with a blanket, his hair was pulled up in a loose bun as he threw the blanket over the two making sure that it was covering most of the boy.
He then moved to pull Shota’s black hair up into a loose bun so it wouldn’t get in the way or irritate the sleeping boy. He looked down at him since he was moving to try to move into his contact. Then he went ahead and removed his capture weapon and slipped it over the boy's head, being gentle and keeping him comfortable. He was quiet but seemed to calm down once it was applied, he snuggled closer to him and buried his head into it. He sighed and ruffled his hair a little, resuming the motions on his back.
He’d like to continue his grading and evaluations of their skill but right now, he’d much rather keep the small boy from waking up or getting disturbed. He’d have to contact Nezu and Hound Dog tomorrow, so he should let him sleep as he slumped a little and closed his own eyes. It wouldn’t be smart to be tired during all this, he’d have to figure out who prescribed this since Hound Dog couldn’t give them prescriptions. Whoever did this, he wasn’t gonna let the fucker get away with causing his Problem Child more stress.