Chapter Text
Regulus walked up a long long flight of stairs to his new dorm room. He wished the paths to Ravenclaw tower were shorter and he remembered his brother fussing about the same exact thing last Christmas break. Gryffindor and Ravenclaw were on the same level, though the spire of Ravenclaw soared even taller than Gryffindor. Regulus huffed and puffed as he climbed the seemingly endless stairs before finally giving the password that would grant him access to his new home. The common room of Ravenclaw was sprawling, row after row of chess tables and bookshelves and strange looking academic equipment. It had a lovely bustle of students reading, writing, or engaging in deep discussions. Not a single student present wasn't engaged in some sort of academic pursuit.
A brown-haired girl around his age bounded over and linked arms with him. "Regulus! We were waiting for you. We've got questions and I'm sure you have the answer."
Regulus felt a surge of confidence effuse him and he nodded. "I'm sure I do."
The girl dragged him forward over to a waiting gaggle of eager faces. His friends. They were all first years too, and all in Ravenclaw, but Regulus was the only one of them who had spent the summer studying potions and they all needed him to pass their class. He was invaluable to them and they adored him for it. The girl dragged him down to sit as the others all hung on his every word as he explained how to brew a perfect Cure For Boils potion. When he had explained it they gushed about his intelligence and Regulus found himself beaming with pride.
"He has an Aspen wand." One of the boys said eagerly. "Those always go to the smart ones."
"He's in Ravenclaw." Another said "Of course he's smart!"
"And cunning." A voice said from behind Regulus.
Regulus spun around with a sputter. There was another student standing there with their arms crossed and the badge of a Prefect pinned on their chest. The prefect badge seemed to glow and it felt like it was burning Regulus' face.
"I'm not cunning!" He said desperately, but the prefect was already reaching down and dragging him upwards.
"Very cunning. A snake in the Eagle's nest." The prefect said with a fanged snarl before yanking on Regulus' pristine blue tie. The tie suddenly burst into flames and Regulus let out a shriek of terror. The prefect was shoving him away, waving their wand, and suddenly Regulus' robes were gone. All that was left were bright emerald green boxers. He gasped and covered himself as his friends all laughed at him.
"Slither away, Regulus." The prefect snapped. "You don't belong here."
Regulus turned and ran.
* * *
Regulus kicked awake gasping in the night, sitting upright as he felt his body covered with a light sweat. What a stupid dream that had been. He shuddered as he buried his face into his hands and tried to quiet his breathing so he wouldn't alert his new dorm mates that he'd just had a nightmare. They would look down on him and he couldn't afford that. He was a Black. He knew he wasn't going to get to bed again anytime soon so instead he crawled from bed, parting the green curtains that surrounded it.
His bare feet landed softly on the cold flagstone floor of the castle. It wasn't hard to be quiet, he had grown up in 12 Grimmauld Place and he knew how to sneak about when he didn't want to be caught. It was best without socks, even if the chill on his toes wasn't comfortable. He slipped easily from his dorm room and down the steps to the common room. Everyone else was asleep so the common room was dark and empty, though the plush carpets beneath his feet were a welcome change. He sought a large armchair in the corner and snuggled down, wrapping the blanket he'd brought from the dorm around him and pressing his face down into it.
Regulus didn't like his new dorm room, or his roommates. He would much rather have a private room all to himself but of course that just wasn't done at Hogwarts. He felt like he couldn't think properly with them around though, and all he wanted was a moment of peace to sit and process the feast and the sorting and everything that had happened since boarding the Hogwarts express. He shivered and wrapped the blanket a bit more tightly around his shoulders and looked over at the strange filtered light that came down through the dorm skylights, rippling from being under the lake. The light had to come from a almost full moon tonight, otherwise there was nothing bright enough to make it down to the depths of the Hogwarts dungeon.
He'd never liked the dark and now he was supposed to sleep every night in a dungeon. If he had been sorted into Gryffindor maybe then he could have snuck into his older brother's dorm room and crawled into bed with him like he used to do at home. There wasn't anyone here that he could do that with. He was supposed to face the dark and the creeping shadows all alone. If he had the magic he would start a fire in the fireplace, one just like in his dream, but rather than that he just had to be cold.
The dream he'd just woken up from felt like it was clinging to his skin. Just like the doubt that had persisted ever since the sorting hat had yelled out Slytherin! He had been told all his life that he belonged in this house, and he had wanted to be here to make his parents proud. He had done what Sirius had not, been sorted properly into the house of his father and their ancestors. Mother had been so so angry when Sirius had been sorted into Gryffindor. He remembered the way her back had straightened up when reading the letter from school, the way her eyes had turned cold and hard, and the way she had lifted her chin and stared right at Regulus and declared "Your brother has disappointed our family." Then mother had stood, her hand white knuckled on the skirt of her dress, and swept away into the secret room under the stairs. Regulus didn't know what magical room she had stepped into then, only that she had not come out for several days.
Mother wouldn't have that reaction to Regulus' sorting. She would read the letter that Regulus had sent after the feast and she would be pleased. He had done what the family expected of him. Why did this success feel so hollow and false then? He hadn't told mother in his letter that he had been a hat stall, that the sorting hat had lingered on his head for far longer than average, warring with his mind on where he belonged. A true Black would have been settled in Slytherin right away, he suspected.
He sighed to himself and rested his head on his knees. He wished the doubt would go away. He was the only one who would ever know what the hat had said during his sorting. He was safe and everything would be fine.
* * *
"Ravenclaw. Yes I think Ravenclaw." The hat had whispered it almost immediately into Regulus' mind when its worn leather had settled on his hair.
"No!" Regulus had been quick to think back at the hat. Sirius had said the hat took thoughts into account. "You have to put me in Slytherin. I want to be in Slytherin."
"Slytherin? Your mind is keen, but not so cunning. Ravenclaw would allow you to thrive."
"I can become cunning if my mind is keen. I'm ambitious too. I'll be a great wizard, I belong in Slytherin."
"There are great great wizards in Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff and Gryffindor."
"I need to be in Slytherin. Put me in Slytherin."
"Your brother was a much easier sort, Gryffindor through and through. I could place you in Slytherin, there is a touch of it in you."
"So put me in there." Regulus had practically been begging in his mind. The fear had been clogging up his throat as he imagined the letter that would come from his mother if he ended up in Ravenclaw.
"Please." He had begged to the hat, his hands gripped tightly in front of him. "You must put me in Slytherin. I will do very good there. Ravenclaw will not be enough."
"Enough." The hat's whispered word seemed to echo around his mind and he had tried not to shiver. "Yes indeed, why be enough when you could be more? Ravenclaw would make you more than just your base. It would allow your mind to thrive."
Regulus knew he was losing the fight and the fear began to clog over his mind. He would do anything to make this hat stop. He would rip it off his head and declare his own house if he must. He did not particularly enjoy confrontation but he thought he would stare down McGonagall and Dumbledore and state that he was a Black of Slytherin house. He refused to wear a tie other than emerald. There was simply too much on the line. The hat was silent, seemingly sitting there and soaking up his thoughts and his growing rage and fear. Fine, let it peer into his mind. His mind had never truly been his own. His parents made sure of that. If anything this was the very first night of his life that he could think whatever he liked without feeling like mother or father was somehow reading it on his face.
He felt his chin raising slightly and his jaw clenching. He was too good to be placed in Ravenclaw with lowly academics. Ravenclaw was a house not destined for true greatness. Most who graduated from it became teachers or researchers or healers. Some of their names were known but they were not know for the power they wielded. In order for the Black Family to flourish they needed to continue upholding the power that had been passed from generation to generation. Slytherin was the house that gave that sort of power and therefore it was the house that Regulus deserved. He had no aims to be a teacher or anything like that. He would focus his attentions on excelling academically, yes, but all that academic success would be able to garner power in the future.
For a long time the hat just seemed to sit silent and listen to his thoughts. It didn't speak any longer. Others did. Regulus had heard the whispers of the great hall as the hat stalled silent on his head. He knew everyone was talking about him. Wondering about what houses the hat was choosing between. Let them wonder. It didn't matter. He was essentially alone in this hall. He kept his chin held high and his hands clenched tight until, eventually, the hat chose.
"SLYTHERIN."
The hat had thundered it out to the hall and Regulus had heard his own ragged sigh of relief and the polite claps and cheers of his new housemates. The hat wasn't done with him yet though. Before Professor McGonagall had removed it from his head the hat had whispered one last final thing into his mind.
"Such a shame, you could have been greater."
* * *
Regulus awoke to a hand shaking his shoulder gently. He must have fallen asleep in the chair by the cold fireplace, though he hadn't intended to. He felt his face flushing red as he pulled back from the hand and looked up. There was a girl there, only a little older than himself. Her wavy blonde hair was cut in a bob and she had a bright smile on her face.
"You're Regulus, right? Sirius' brother. Wow you two look so alike." She said in a friendly manner.
Regulus uncurled himself from where he had slept, looking at her cautiously. This was very similar to his nightmare. But he was awake now. He was in Slytherin dorm and this girl was wearing the emerald uniform. "Yeah, I'm Regulus."
"Marlene." She said, holding out her hand confidently. Regulus hesitantly took it and give it a firm shake.
"Come on, you should get up before the other first years come down." Marlene said, tugging Regulus upright. "Slytherin can be judgy sometimes, it sets the first year off horribly. Take my word for it."
Regulus glanced towards the stairs of the boy's dormitory. Marlene was probably right. He wouldn't want his dormmates to think him weird for sleeping down in the common room. He'd intended to go back up there but instead had fallen asleep. He turned and grabbed up the duvet he'd brought down with him and tried to fold it. Marlene tugged it from his hands and tossed it over the back of the chair.
"Don't worry about it, the house elves will get it. You slept in your uniform, huh?" Marlene spoke at him gently, looking over him. Regulus was sure he looked rumpled and unsure of himself. He'd been so nervous last night.
He folded his arms tightly across his chest. He wasn't sure how to explain to this new person that he'd never changed in front of anyone except his family. It had seemed so strange how the other boys had stripped down with no care and changed into their pajamas. Regulus had wanted to get into the bathroom to change but one of the boy's had taken ages in the shower so instead he'd just quietly crawled into his bed in his slacks and sweater and told himself he would change before sleeping. But he found that once he was ensconced in the bubble of his curtained bed he couldn't bring himself to leave it again. What if one of his dormmates had their curtains open and wanted to chat? He would have no idea what to say. So instead he'd ended up sleeping in his uniform. Now he would go to classes wrinkled on the very first day. Regulus flinched as Marlene reached towards him, but all she did was straighten up his tie and smile at him.
"Come on, you can come to breakfast with me. I'll show you the ropes."
In lieu of other options Regulus nodded and followed Marlene from the dorms. He soon found that Marlene was bubbly and personable. She had plenty to say and teach as they walked through the halls. She pointed out the Hufflepuff dorms, several quiet study nooks, and a secret staircase that went right up to the library. She also waved hello to quite a few students. It was clear that people liked Marlene a lot. Regulus found Marlene surprising. He had expected Slytherins to be vastly different than her. More like his cousins who were cold, refined, and kept their emotions in check. Most of the Slytherins he had met so far had been purebloods raised with etiquette at the forefront of their personality. Marlene was nothing like what he would have expected. She was loud, brash, and seemed to delight in grinning widely. Regulus did note to himself that most everything Marlene pointed out to him had to do with studying though; she was clearly a dedicated student herself.
When they got to the Great Hall he jumped slightly as Marlene linked arms with him. She laughed lightly and ruffled his hair. "Sirius used to be so jumpy too when we were first becoming friends. I don't bite." She winked. "Come on."
Regulus let himself be towed over to Slytherin table and sat down beside Marlene and several first and second years; he noticed with surprise that not all of them were Slytherins. There were a few Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs, though no Gryffindors. Apparently Hogwarts was not overly strict about sitting with your house at all meals. Marlene was greeted with smiles and polite nods. People seemed to regard Regulus curiously; waiting to see what type of person he was. He sat himself down without greeting beside Marlene. He wanted breakfast, he didn't need to try and make friends with these people. He just wanted to survive his first day.
"Caradoc Dearborn." A boy across from him said with a bright smile. He wondered briefly if Caradoc and Marlene were related because Caradoc had the same sort of shiny blonde curls as Marlene, though his skin was more golden than hers. He had a blinding smile with only one crooked tooth off to the side. He wore the blue tie of Ravenclaw house and Regulus felt a brief strange jealousy before he reminded himself he had been sorted into the house he wanted.
"Regulus Black." He said politely before reaching for the teapot that had just appeared between them. He calmly poured himself some tea, expecting that the other boy was done talking to him. Apparently not.
"So you're the Baby Black then? We were all wondering what house you were going to get after your brother's sorting. And a hat stall! Both of you are exciting."
Regulus scrunched his nose. "I'm not a baby and the outcome of my sorting isn't surprising." He said succinctly
Dearborn seemed to find this funny for some reason, and threw back his head and laughed. Regulus found himself staring askance at Caradoc. Apparently he had managed to find someone in this school who was louder than his brother. He hadn't thought it could be done.
"So what house was the hat struggling with besides Slytherin?" Marlene asked, curiously leaning over. "Gryffindor like your brother?"
"Goodness no." Regulus snapped quickly. Caradoc kept laughing. Regulus had no idea what the joke was so he just sipped his tea politely, saucer held in one hand and cup in the other. "And it doesn't matter. I'm a Slytherin. That's all."
"Its a great house." Marlene said, heaping breakfast onto her plate. "Bit snobby sometimes, definitely has strange ideas, but we're brilliant on the Quidditch pitch and this year I think we'll easily get the most house points. I just have a good feeling."
Regulus straightened up at the mention of Quidditch. "You think Slytherin will do good again on the pitch this year?"
"Oh definitely!" Marlene beamed "I'll be trying out! Once they have a McKinnon on their side they'll do even better."
"I can't wait to meet you in the air, McKinnon." Caradoc said, leaning forward. "I'm trying out for Ravenclaw of course. Bit of a shoe-in"
Dearborn did this thing where he flipped his curls and Regulus couldn't help but scoff slightly. The guy was only a year older than him but he acted like he was the coolest person around for some reason. Absurd. Still it was neat that he had found two people interested in Quidditch so soon.
"I'm going to try out next year when I can." Regulus said. "I'd like to play as Seeker."
Marlene whistled. "So you like to go fast huh? I can see you being good at that. You're slim. Kinda tall, but slim."
"Aerodynamic." Caradoc teased.
Regulus ignored Dearborn and instead focused on Marlene. "What position are you trying out for?"
"Beater." Marlene said easily. "Not many girl beaters in Hogwarts history but honestly its my favorite position."
"Our Marlene is a bit of a hothead." Another Slytherin down the line called with a laugh. Marlene laughed sweetly and Regulus had a hard time imagining Marlene wielding a beater's bat or being at all hotheaded. She seemed far too even keel and nice.
"I'll be trying out for Keeper." Dearborn interjected even though Regulus had not asked him. "I'm brilliant on a broom and don't mind the idea of having all those eyes on me as I keep the goals. Though wouldn't mind Seeker down the line. But we Eagles have an awesome Seeker right now and she doesn't graduate for a bit. Might as well spread my skills around for a while."
Regulus had a hard time not rolling his eyes at Dearborn's cockiness.
"You're such a dick, Cara." Marlene said with a laugh. Regulus felt his face heating bright red at the crass word easily dropping from the lips of a girl. He half expected Dearborn to lash out at her for it. Instead Caradoc started laughing again. Regulus looked between them and Marlene laughed as well.
"Don't look so worried, Reggie." Marlene said easily. "Cara and I are friends. We josh each other about. You'll get used to it."
Regulus nodded but internally he was thinking that, no, no he never would. Was this what Sirius had been going on about last year? He had gushed about James and his other friends. They had made him louder. Bolder. They had gotten Sirius to say things that Regulus had never expected. Marlene and Caradoc seemed much the same as the thing that Sirius so loved. Except to Regulus it was so intimidating. They were loud, crass, and made him feel vastly out of his depths. He quietly ate his morning meal and joined in the conversation when someone asked him something, but he tried to stay on the fringe. He didn't want to get sucked into the same world of mistakes that his brother had made.
When the meal ended he quickly got up as Marlene and Caradoc argued bitterly about last year's Quidditch stats. While they were distracted he scurried away towards the door. He did look back when he got there and he felt a bit guilty when he saw Marlene standing and looking about. She was clearly looking for him, ready to show him more and take him under her wing. He thought about lingering in the doorway where she would see him. She would catch up to him, link arms with him, and Regulus had a feeling he would be stuck with her for the rest of his days here. His eyes drifted over to Caradoc and down to the blue tie sitting improperly about his neck. Marlene and Caradoc seemed to be a package deal and for some reason seeing the boy in Ravenclaw blue turned his stomach.
He ducked through the doorway and set off alone. Marlene was a trap. She wasn't the sort of Slytherin he was supposed to be fraternizing with. Nor was Caradoc the sort he should linger around either. He wasn't a Ravenclaw and he didn't need to waste his time befriending them. Besides, making friends seemed far too confusing of a thing to navigate. Best to just avoid it.
* * *
"Mr. Black, please read for us the list of required ingredients for the Cure For Boils potion." Professor Slughorn said, calling on Regulus out of the blue.
He knew why the professor had called on him, his potions book was firmly shut while all other students had theirs open. Regulus preferred to keep his shut to test himself on the material that he felt quite confident in knowing. He had been steadily taking notes all class and he was eager to finally be in a proper potions class rather just in the kitchen with his mother.
Regulus didn't need to open his book or pause before reciting the ingredients easily "The potion calls for snake fangs, horned slugs, and porcupine quills, Professor."
Professor Slughorn looked slightly shocked for a moment before nodding. "Yes indeed, Mr. Black. Very good. Five points to Slytherin."
Regulus felt his chest swell with pride and he ducked his head back to his notes to hide the smile pulling at his lips. His hand was shaking slightly as it held his quill. He tried to distract himself from this effervescent joy by taking notes but instead he doodled a useless squiggle. He had won his house five points! Possibly the very first house points that Slytherin had received so far this year. It was the first day, it was possible! He wanted to write an Owl to mother informing her of this. He wanted to tell Sirius just as badly.
The rest of potions class he raised his hand and effortlessly answered questions that Professor Slughorn asked. The man seemed overjoyed to have such an eager and willing student and Regulus felt pride suffusing every inch of him. Not many other students knew these sorts of questions on day one. At one point one student answered, got it wrong, and Professor Slughorn asked him instead and he got it right.
That was when the whispering started up.
Regulus had sat himself down near the front of the classroom so that he could take nice clean notes. He was tall, but not so much that he would block the view from others. There were only a few students in front of him now and he saw one of them, a Gryffindor, turn about and shoot him a look before leaning back to whisper to a friend. He heard more whispers at his back. He couldn't tell what they were saying but he heard the name Black whispered a few times and a few snorts as he raised his hand again to answer a question.
Shame sunk into his stomach and he hunched his shoulders slightly as he gave the answer. He didn't understand why people seemed annoyed with him. Most of the other students in this classroom were from Slytherin House. He was supposed to be answering questions, wasn't he? They were all here to learn and clearly he knew the most and so he was providing those answers. He glanced back over his shoulder and caught eyes with another student, one of his dormmates. The boy sneered, rolled his eyes and then turned to talk with his partner, another of Regulus' new dormmates. Regulus turned back to his notes, ducked his head, and didn't answer any more questions for the rest of class. Not even when Professor Slughorn seemed to let his questions linger in the air, clearly hoping a student would know the answer.
When class ended he quickly grabbed up his books and headed for the door. He would go to History next and in that class he planned on sitting in the back. That way there wouldn't be any whispering behind him. He would be able to see all the seats spread out before him, chess pieces on the board, and know he was safe. He felt someone bump into him from the side, followed by harsh laughter, and then his two dormmates strode past him. One of the boys turned his head and jeered.
"Nobody likes a prissy showoff, Black."
"Except Ravenclaws!" His friend said and they put their heads together and laughed as they headed off down the hall.
Regulus felt his hand clenching tightly around his potions book as he watched them go. He was not a show-off and he was certainly not prissy. He had just been doing what they were too daft to do. He grit his jaw and stared down at the ground angrily as the rest of the students streamed out of the classroom around him. He was so frustrated and upset. The first day was not going how he imagined.
He felt a hand on his shoulder and flinched slightly before looking up and finding Professor Slughorn standing there. The bespectacled man was a funny sort. He didn't look anything like what Regulus had expected from a head of Slytherin House. Regulus had always imagined a potions Professor to be someone like his mother; severe and astute and with some scarring due to their profession. Slughorn wasn't like that. He was a soft looking man with heavy jowls and kindly eyes. His hair was just starting to gray a bit and he wore a rather nice waistcoat and pocket-watch beneath a worn teacher's robe. He looked like Uncle Alphard in a strange way. Regulus flicked his eyes down to Professor Slughorn's hand and noticed that, yes, there was a faint smattering of pockmarks and scars along his hand, just like mother's. Slughorn seemed to notice his observations and removed his hand with a chuckle.
"You're a very keen man, Mr. Black. Very keen. You know I was a bit worried to see how you would be in my classroom after the antics of your brother."
Regulus turned to face his Professor carefully. "Sirius wasn't very good in class, was he?" He asked. He knew Sirius could manage potions but he also knew Sirius was...Sirius.
"No. Indeed not. But I have hope." Professor Slughorn rested his hands in the pockets of his waistcoat and peered down at Regulus. "You, my boy, are going to go very far in Potions. Make no mistake. Has Walburga been teaching you? She has a mind for it beyond nearly anyone I've met."
Regulus smiled and nodded. "She's taught both of us. I like it a lot." He hesitated and looked down the hall at his retreating classmates. "I'm sorry if I answered too many questions, Professor. I'm just excited."
Slughorn shook his head. "The pursuits of Academia can be cutthroat, young Mr. Black." Slughorn said. "Some students see it as a competition. To win. In the end the only one you are truly competing with is yourself, though it doesn't hurt to be a better than the rest as well." He gave the side of his nose a little tap and winked.
Regulus furrowed his brow slightly and then nodded. It was a bit like chess. Your opponent was there to challenge you but the real challenge was what was happening within your own mind. In order to get better at Chess you had to get better at strategy, about reading people, and about understanding. Without that constantly evolving foundation you could never seek to win or to grow. He supposed he could understand what his Professor was trying to say then.
"Thank you, Sir." He said politely.
"Best be off now, Mr. Black. I am sure we will be seeing a lot of each other in the future." Professor Slughorn gripped his shoulder again, gave it a pat, and them ambled back into the Potion's classroom.
Regulus turned and quickly hurried down the hall to History, knowing full well that all of the seats in the back of the classroom would be long gone. He took a breath and held his head high as he strode into the room, up to the front, and set his books down precisely. He wasn't a pawn in this game. He had full autonomy over himself and he was determined. He needed to push all of these emotional nuisances out of the way and focus in on what mattered. His academic success would recover some of what Sirius lost from the Black Family name. He would prove that it wasn't just chance that their family was part of the sacred Twenty-Eight and had existed generation after generation. He could ignore all these whispers behind him because they simply did not matter. He was destined for far greater things than any of them. The board of Hogwarts spread before him and he would be the one to yell Check Mate at the end of seven years. He would win.