Archive of Our Own

“Well hello there, cutie,” Lance says with a charming smirk.

The girl giggles to herself.

“What’s a fine thing like you doing around here?”

“I just wanted to see the marvellous paladins of Voltron,” She says seductively.

Flattery. Lance can get with this.

“I doubt any of us are as marvellous as you,” Lance says with a wink. “Say, how about I go show you my lion?”

“Lance!” Shiro yells out, and Lance throws his head back with a groan before looking towards Shiro, exasperated.

“What? I’m not causing a scene!” He calls out.

“You and I both know that can change very quickly,” Shiro says, glaring at Lance like a disappointed dad.

Lance turns back to the girl - who is now gone. Great.

Shiro walks over to Lance and guides him along with a hand behind his back.

“Look, I know that you just want to have fun, but the weight of the entire universe is on our shoulders. Flirting should be at the back of your mind.”

Lance rolls his eyes.

“You can’t expect me to see a gorgeous babe and not flirt, Shiro.”

Shiro sighs and shakes his head, finally dropping his hand.

“Behave, Lance.”

“Fine, Dad,” He retorts. Shiro makes a face before walking up to Allura.

Hopefully Shiro won’t keep interrupting Lance’s flirting in the future. This may sound dramatic, but he will die if he can’t.

Lance’s hopes go unlistened to. Or, well, they kind of do - maybe Lance shouldn’t be so specific when making wishes.

“Lance,” Pidge groans out, interrupting his conversation with a rather gorgeous girl.

“What?” Lance asks, incredulous.

“Do you really want to get in trouble with Shiro again?” Pidge asks rhetorically, raising a single brow.

“Well, no, but I don’t see why I can’t flirt.”

The girl Lance was talking to walks away, again, and Lance sighs to turn towards Pidge.

“Not that I can anymore, because you ruined it. Thanks, Pidge,” Lance snarks.

“No problem,” Pidge replies, equally snarky, disappearing into the crowd.

Lance glances around. Maybe he still has a chance-

“Nope,” He hears Hunk say, and Lance turns to the direction the voice came from. “I know that face,” Hunk continues as he comes into view, standing next to Lance, “And that’s your no-good face. As in, I’m-going-to-flirt-and-probably-cause-a-diplomatic-disaster face.”

“I’m not-”

“Uh-bup-bup,” Hunk says, waving his index finger in front of Lance’s mouth. “Don’t you dare. I’ve seen it happen way too much, buddy. I really don’t feel like cleaning up one of your messes tonight.”

“Dude,” Lance whines, slumping over.

“I’m on Lance duty tonight, which means we’re going to the buffet table.”

“‘Lance duty’?” Lance questions as they start to head towards the piles of food.

“Yeah,” Hunk shrugs. “Your last incident was one too many, apparently, because Shiro set up a schedule where everyone has to stick with you and make sure you don’t cause an incident.”

“You’re shitting me,” Lance says, incredulous and kind of terrified.

“Nope,” Hunk says, somehow oblivious to Lance’s inner turmoil.

I’m gonna fucking die, Lance thinks to himself, hysterical. I’m a dead man walking. Fuck.

Hunk was not lying.

They stop by a marketplace, and apparently it’s Keith’s turn, as he drags him away from a… friendly shopkeeper.

“Dude,” Lance whines, trying to find his footing as Keith drags him by the collar.

“Nope,” Keith says.

“I could’ve gotten our stuff for free!”

“Or you could’ve gotten us kicked out.”

“You kicked us out!” Lance cries out, throwing his hands up and becoming dead weight. Keith stumbles at first before he continues dragging a - now sitting - Lance. His strength is baffling and really, really hot. Not that Lance will ever tell Keith that.

“At least we can return later, or, better yet, tell someone else to go there.”

Lance groans and crosses his arms, pouting like a petulant child, as Keith continues to drag them back to their meeting spot.

Lance’s pants are going to be so dirty after this, and not in the way he hoped.

Lance sneaks out into the servers' room, following a waiter that caught his eye.

“Hey there,” He murmurs to her as she grabs another tray of drinks.

“Hi,” She replies, turning and leaving the tray behind. “You’re quite cute.”

“I could say the same about you,” Lance replies in a low voice with a smirk. “Say, would you like to get out of here for a bit-”

“Lance!” Someone yells out, and Lance drops his shoulders in exasperation, turning to the person that so rudely interrupted him.

“What the fuck do you want,” Lance snaps out, and maybe he’s being rude, but what the fuck?! Again?

“You know you’re not allowed to flirt,” Keith grumbles, already grabbing Lance’s sleeve to drag him out.

“Fuck off, man,” Lance hisses, ripping his arm from Keith’s hand. He will be getting into somebody’s pants tonight if it kills him. Because it will either way.

“Lance,” Keith growls out, something dark flowing into his voice. “Don’t fucking test me. Get back out into the main area.”

“No,” Lance hisses out into Keith’s face. “You get back out there and let me live my fucking life.”

Keith’s expression takes a form Lance has never seen before, and it’s gone before Lance can figure it out. Keith steps back and raises his fists.

“Are you serious?!” Lance screeches out, gaping. “You’re going to fight me?”

“Yep,” Keith replies, monotone.

“Fine,” Lance hisses out, already gearing up for a fight.

“Boys,” Allura grumbles out. “You cannot hide in here-” Her posture loosens when she catches their battle stances. “Were you two about to fight?” She hisses out, incredulous.

“He started it!” Both Keith and Lance say, pointing to each other respectively.

Allura pinches the bridge of her nose with a sigh before grabbing both their arms. Unfortunately, neither can manage to defeat Allura’s strength.

“I must apologize,” Allura states diplomatically to the leader of whatever gala thing they’re at right now. “These two paladins have had too much to drink, I’m afraid-” she pointedly ignores Lance’s indignant squawk. “-So I shall be taking them back to their living quarters before returning. I hope my absence will cause no trouble.”

“Of course,” The leader says with a respectful nod.

“Nice job, asshole,” Lance snips after they’re out of earshot.

“Maybe if you weren’t flirting this wouldn’t have happened,” Keith hisses out.

“Fuck you, man.”

“Fuck you!”

“Stop it,” Allura hisses out, and her grip becomes impossibly tighter. Lance whimpers a bit in pain.

Keith and Lance glare at each other until Allura locks them into their respective rooms.

This is getting dangerous, Lance thinks as he applies foundation over his eye bags. He’s been trying his best to not panic about his condition, but if his team doesn’t stop cockblocking him, they’re going to be down a paladin.

Not that it matters, since the whole team hates him anyways, and he has nothing to bring to the team except annoying flirting and lucky shots. Honestly, they’ll probably be better off with a different paladin, but Lance’s untimely death would not be very great in terms of the war. He hopes they can at least find a suitable replacement before he kicks the bucket.

…unless he tells them?

He thinks back to his first ‘best friend’ and shakes his head. That would be a thousand times worse.

He would rather die with happy memories than his team hating him.

Lance has reached his limit.

“C’mon, Lance,” Keith says, rolling his eyes. For some reason it feels like Keith’s been the one cockblocking him the most recently.

“No,” Lance hisses out, even worse than at that banquet. It has far more venom as he barely rips his arm out of Keith’s grip. He’s getting weaker.

“Lance,” Keith says, starting to get pissed off. “You know you can’t-”

“Well fuck you!” Lance yells out, throwing his hands up in the air and backing off.

“Why can’t you understand that flirting with people can get you killed?”

“Why can’t you understand that not flirting can do the same,” Lance growls out before spinning on his heel.

“Stop being a drama queen,” Keith says, already grabbing Lance’s hand and dragging him away.

“Keith,” Lance says, and wow, that came out much more broken than intended.

Keith stops short and slowly turns.

“Please,” Lance practically whispers.

Keith’s face goes through about a thousand expressions before settling on exasperation.

“Another manipulation tactic? Seriously?” Keith questions, groaning.

“Keith,” Lance says, and whimpers.

Fuck. This is bad. Really bad. Even just the mild contact of Keith’s hand makes Lance want to jump his bones.

Keith looks around a bit, as if looking for someone to save the situation for him.

“Look, I don’t understand why you’re so fucking desperate, but you don’t want to fuck over this alliance, do you?”

Lance’s vision begins to get blurry.

Shit. This has only happened once before, when he first presented, and he only could be woken up if he had someone to fuck right in front of him. If his team wakes him up, then… well, it won't be fun.

Lance is starting to have a really hard time controlling himself.

Keith’s pretty damn hot, and he’s right there. He could feed right now, if he could just convince…

“Keith,” Lance mumbles out, delirious.

“Lance, what the fu-” Keith growls out before being interrupted by Lance’s lips on his.

Keith immediately pushes Lance back, gaping at him with wide eyes, and Lance whines.

“Please,” Lance mumbles, staring right at Keith’s lips. Keith’s lips, that are cracked from all of his nervous nibbling. That are dry, and how much Lance would love to make them wet.

“Lance,” Keith whispers, horrified, confused, and concerned all at once. “What’s going on?”

“I-” Lance says before everything goes dark.

Whoops.

Keith glances nervously between Coran and the pod holding Lance hostage. He can’t help but feel guilty; he always put in extra effort to stop Lance’s flirting (for ulterior motives), and for some reason something is telling Keith that’s how Lance ended up here. Even though that makes no sense.

“He’ll be okay,” Shiro mumbles, but even his voice wavers with uncertainty.

Coran had said that Lance was showing signs of malnourishment, which made sense to no one, particularly when Coran said that for all intents and purposes he should not be. He apparently had plenty of nutrients, all that are necessary for the human body to function, but his body is still acting like he's been deprived of one. Severely so.

"It's as if someone took protein or calcium out of his diet. He's extremely sick," Coran says, moustache twitching in concern. "How could we have not noticed?"

Keith steps up to the cryopod and squints through the glass.

"I think he might have make-up on," Keith says, still looking at Lance's dormant body.

A hand is pushing Keith away, and he turns to see Allura has taken his place.

"He does," She mumbles. "I don't know where he found it, but he's wearing Altean foundation."

"It's- it's all over his face."

"He must be extremely pallid," Allura mumbles, horrified.

"How could this happen?"

"Am I unaware of something else humans require to live?" Coran questions, still staring at the pictures of Lance's charts.

"I don't think so," Pidge says, chewing on their nails.

Coran huffs and brings up brain scans.

"Hang on," Coran mumbles, bringing up two other brain scans. "Pidge," Coran continues, pointing towards one picture. "Does that look bizarre to you?"

"That-" Pidge starts, before furrowing their brows. "There's not supposed to be that much activity there."

"That's what Lance's brain activity looked like when he first arrived on the castle," Coran says before he points to a different scan, much more dull than the other two. "That's his brain activity currently."

"That entire section is practically non-existent," Pidge mumbles, stepping closer and adjusting their glasses. "There shouldn't be that little activity, particularly in comparison to his first scan."

Pidge leans back on their heels, studying the scans further.

"Coran, do you know what that part of the brain usually handles?"

"I believe that's the pituitary gland!" Coran says, far too cheerful. "It controls hormones and turns food into energy," Coran continues, slowing down near the end, thinking about his words.

"So why had it been lit up like a firework?" Pidge questions.

"I'm- not sure," Coran stutters. "In Hunk's brain it's barely lit up at all."

"You're comparing Lance's brain to mine?" Hunk questions.

"Allura, Keith, and I are a different species, Pidge is a different gender, and Shiro has PTSD," Coran says as if it were a reflex.

"He had seemed a lot slower recently," Keith mentions.

"But what's up with the hormones?" Pidge questions.

"He-" Coran starts, before stepping back, thinking about the situation further. "He shouldn't be able to sleep much, his emotions would be all over the place, and, well, his sexual aspects would not work properly."

"What could be causing this?" Keith questions.

"I don't know," Coran says, shrugging.

"That's weird," Shiro suddenly says. "Keith, didn't you say you had just stopped Lance from flirting?"

Keith blushes at the memory of what happened after, horror dawning on him.

"I-I did. He also- seemed, uh, desperate," Keith says, working around nothing in his throat.

"For what?" Pidge questions, turning to Keith

Keith clears his throat.

"Uh, he, uh, kinda, uh," Keith stutters. "Kissed me?"

"What," Pidge says, flat and deadpan.

"That doesn't make sense," Coran says, shaking his head. "He shouldn't have any sexual drive at all."

Allura pulls up something on a tablet before pushing the hologram next to the scans.

"What-" Coran questions, perturbed at his workspace being disturbed.

"Just read," Allura says, face grim.

After a few moments of reading, Coran's eyes widen.

"Why, that makes perfect sense!" He cries out cheerfully. "He feeds on sexual energy!"

If Keith had been drinking something, it would be all over the floor.

"I'm sorry," Keith says, incredulous, "What the fuck? Are you saying he's a fucking incubus or something?"

"What's an incubus?" Coran questions, blinking innocently.

"A sex demon," Keith says, tone flat. His face shows his embarrassment.

"Uh," Coran says, considering. "I wouldn't say a demon. More like an empath that only feeds on a specific emotion."

"So you're saying he needs to fuck someone," Pidge states, and she actually seems mildly annoyed. "Of course. Loverboy actually needs a lover."

"Wait- so, if there's no activity," Hunk says, trailing off.

"He's been starving for months," Coran says.

"How do we fix this?" Keith questions.

"Well," Coran says, turning to the group. "You'd need to find a willing participant, one that should be aware Lance is not in the right state of mind."

"He won't-?" Hunk questions.

"Once we release Lance from the pod, he'll be absolutely ravenous. He would even have intercourse with a sibling or parent, at this point."

Pidge fake retches at the idea, and the rest of the team isn't faring much better.

"He needs to have a willing participant," Coran starts, expression turning grim, "because he will not care if they consent. It's as if you were to put poisoned food in front of a starving man. He would still eat it, simply because his instincts are taking over."

"How are we supposed to find a, uh, 'willing participant'?" Keith questions. "It's not like we can go up to someone and say 'hey, can you fuck my friend so he doesn't die?'."

Coran twirls his moustache as he thinks.

"The pod should keep him alive, it's possible we can go and find a planet whose population is sexually active."

"So we should just entrust a stranger to him?" Shiro questions, concerned. "How do we know this person won't take advantage of him, or even kill him?"

"Who's to say they even have the same parts?" Pidge adds. "Or that they'll be comfortable with the way Lance will want to, uh, do it?"

"I'm not sure what solution you're looking for," Coran says with a shrug. "This seems to be the only way. We need to find a willing participant to release him from the pod."

Shiro's face suddenly blooms red, and Keith gets a tad nervous at the sudden spike of embarrassment.

"Uh," Shiro stutters, "Couldn't one of us, theoretically, uh, help him?" He says.

Everyone stares at him for a few moments, horrified.

"I'm out," Pidge says immediately, backing off from the pod. "Not a willing participant. At all."

"I would feel really uncomfortable," Hunk says, curling in on himself as he seems to subconsciously shuffle away from the pod. "He's my best friend, he's basically another brother to me."

"I-" Shiro says, slowly backing away. "I- uh, I have someone, back on earth. It- it would feel like I'm cheating on him," Shiro continues, and Keith steps up to him.

"Hey," Keith mumbles. "It's okay. No one is going to force you."

"I think the obvious choice is Allura," Pidge says. "I mean, he flirts with her all the time."

Allura looks horrified, shaking her head quickly.

"He has become like a brother to me," She says, backing away from the pod, too.

Everyone stares at Keith.

"What?" He questions, glancing at everyone around him.

"You're kinda the last hope here, dude," Pidge says, shrugging.

"Uh-" Keith stutters, face blooming red again. He hesitantly shakes his head, but he has a feeling the fact that he did a once-over to Lance in the pod didn't go unnoticed. He clears his throat and looks away.

"Oh," Shiro says, something dawning on him, before a cheshire grin starts to make its way across his face. "Oh," he says again, impish tone accompanying his expression.

"Shiro," Keith hisses out, a warning.

"You definitely are a willing participant," Shiro says, slowly stepping towards Keith.

"Shiro," Keith hisses out again, slowly backing away.

"You like~ him," Shiro continues in a siren song.

"Fuck off!" Keith yells, but his voice is cracking and telling, and he can feel his face impossibly heating further.

"Oh my god," He hears Pidge mumble gleefully in the distance.

"So, uh, why don't you?" Hunk asks, apprehensive and uncertain.

"Because I'd be taking advantage of him!" Keith yaps, throwing his hands in the air, surrendering.

"You'd hardly be doing that, number four!" Coran replies. "If anything, he'd be taking advantage of you!"

"As if that's supposed to help," Keith gripes bitterly.

"He literally needs to fuck you to live and you're afraid you're going to take advantage of him?" Pidge queries, unconvinced.

"And-," Keith starts off, hesitant. "And it will only be sex to him," he finishes off, quiet.

"Dude," Pidge says, bewildered. "He will die if you don't."

"Fine!" Keith screeches out, scuffing his shoe on the floor. "I'll do it!"

"You- you don't have to, if you don't want to," Shiro says, older brother instincts kicking in.

"Oh, I'm sure he wants to," Pidge states like the gremlin they are, "but his moral compass is going crazy."

"Wait," Hunk says, finally catching up with the conversation. "You like him? Like, like like him?"

"That's already been established," Keith hisses, defensive.

"He likes you, too," Hunk blurts out, and then he covers his mouth immediately. He slowly tears it away from his mouth. "He's gonna kill me."

"Problem solved, then!" Coran says. "Keith will stay in here with Lance, and we'll make sure to not come in here until they come out!"

"They're definitely gonna come-" Hunk elbows Pidge before they finish their sentence.

Everyone starts to file out of the room.

"Wait- uh-," Keith starts, stuttering. "This isn't- uhm, exactly, comfortable?" He continues, infliction more so towards a question due to his absolute mortification.

"Oh!" Coran says, perking up and running over to a cabinet Keith didn't know was there. He then proceeds to take out enough blankets and pillows to warm an entire planet. "And-" he continues, plopping the cosy lump on the ground. He turns to another cabinet Keith didn't know existed, and dashes towards Keith so quickly he doesn't even see what Coran grabbed.

"Here you go!" Coran jovially states, placing something in Keith's hands. He then turns and dashes out of the room, the others not too far behind.

...he's not sure if the team hears his screech when he realises Coran handed him lube and condoms.

"That was certainly interesting," Pidge says.

Shiro pinches the bridge of his nose and sighs.

"I'm going to get out of here so I can pretend I didn't just tell my brother to have sex," Shiro declares before storming off in the direction of the training room.

"Is he gonna pull a Keith…?" Pidge questions.

"Probably," Hunk says, shrugging. "Anyways, they, uh, probably will be, uhm, hungry-"

"They both sure are thirsty," Pidge remarks, and Hunk's face manages to light up neon red.

"-so I'll go and, uh, prepare some, uh, food," Hunk stutters nervously, before turning on his heel. "Okayseeyoulaterbye-" he says in one breath and heads to the kitchens.

"Prude," Pidge grumbles and turns to Coran. "Can I see what Allura showed you?" Pidge questions. "I want to know as much as I can about Lance's- uhm, condition? What do I call it?"

"Hmm," Coran says, twisting his moustache as he turns on his heel towards the library, Pidge not too far behind. "I suppose he's a subspecies? Not exactly a human, but it's so close that it can easily look like it to an outsider."

Pidge nods as they continue on their way.

Keith hits the 'release' button on the pod, restless. Lance falls out of the pod, and Keith catches him with ease. Lance picks his head up and stares at Keith with bleary eyes.

"Keith…?" He mumbles, confused. "What-"

"You, uh, fainted," Keith stutters, backing away as Lance gains enough control to stand, but just barely. He seems pretty weak, which makes sense. "Here," Keith says, beckoning him over. He doesn't dare touch Lance. "Sit down."

Lance plops onto the pile of pillows gracelessly.

"Did you put this here?" Lance mumbles.

"Coran did," Keith says, hesitantly sitting a decent stretch away from Lance. "I actually wasn't expecting you to be this coherent."

"What do you mean?" Lance nearly whispers, voice hoarse.

"Uh-" Keith says, standing up to get a glass of water. As he fills it up, he continues the conversation. "We know, uh, you're, like, an, uh-?" He stutters, walking back over to Lance with a now half full glass. "I'm not sure what to call it, but the best comparison I have is an incubus."

The glass stops a few inches from Lance's lips, gaunt fingers turning even more pale.

"What?" He whispers, terrified.

"Not that we care!" Keith suddenly yells out, realising that Lance probably kept it secret for a reason, dumbass. "Well, I mean, we do, but we don't think differently- well, actually, I'm kinda pissed you didn't tell us but-"

Lance's free hand grabs Keith's forearm with a muted touch.

"You're rambling," Lance mumbles.

"We just-" Keith says, finally taking a breath to think about his words. "We don't think of you differently, is what I'm trying to say. You're still Lance, but you as a person kind of makes more sense now."

Lance huffs a dry laugh that turns into a cough.

"Drink," Keith says, gently pushing the bottom of the glass towards Lance's lips. He takes a few greedy gulps, and life seems to light up his eyes nearly instantly. They then take on a deeper tone, iris darkening and thinning by his pupils dilating.

"Why are you here, then?" Lance mumbles. "If you know what I am, then you must know that I- uhm-"

"Desperately need to fuck someone?" Keith questions, for once gaining enough control to say something deadpan.

"Y-yeah, that," Lance says, laughing apprehensively.

"Why do you think I'm the only one here?" Keith questions.

Lance snaps his head around, finally noticing the empty room. The blankets he's sitting on. And, unfortunately for his heart, the, uh, equipment innocently resting at the edge of the blankets.

Lance chokes on his own spit. He turns to see Keith doesn't seem to be faring better, using his bangs to hide his cherry red face.

"Wait- so you-"

"I'm, uh, supposed to be, like, prey or something."

Lance gapes at him.

"Did someone force you here?" Lance says, mind already flashing to his mischievous friends.

"Not, necessarily?" Keith nearly questions, hand reaching to scratch the back of his neck.

"What do you mean by that?"

"Hunk, uh, convinced me I wouldn't be taking advantage of you," Keith says, and he knows the statement puts everything out into the open.

"Take… advantage?" Lance mumbles, trying to figure out what that means, before he freezes. "Wait-"

Keith clears his throat and looks to the side, messing with the hair at the nape of his neck.

"You- you like me, too?" Lance questions, nearly immediately regretting the 'too". What if he was wrong?

"Yeah," Keith mumbles, and something in Lance's heart sparks, reminding him of the deep, guttural hunger he has been suffering through for months.

"I'm gonna jump you now," Lance says, already losing control.

"That was kind of the plan," Keith says, laughing a bit as Lance tackles him into a deep, heated kiss.

Keith and Lance walk into the kitchen, holding hands. Lance’s skin is practically glowing, and Keith’s smile is hesitant but blinding nonetheless.

“Hunk!” Lance yells out. “My buddy, my pal,” He continues, letting go of Keith’s hand, much to Keith’s disappointment. “What are ‘ya making?”

Hunk looks at Lance with a scrutinizing eye.

“Do you even need to eat?”

Lance blinks a few times before it clicks.

“Oh, definitely,” He says, nodding before resting his head on his hand, arm on the counter. “Think of me like, half incubus or something. I still need human food, but I also happen to need incubus food. Kinda like how Keith needs a higher protein diet.”

Hunk nods, conceding and pleased with that answer.

“In that case, I think I managed to make garlic knots.”

“No way,” Lance whispers, smile creeping across his face.

“Try one,” Hunk says, placing a lump in Lance’s hand. “Sorry they’re not very knot-like, the dough is really thick, but there’s a thinning agent to make it more fluffy when heated.”

Lance takes a bite and moans.

“My dude, my bro, my platonic life partner, you are the best.”

Keith steps up and stares at the pan full of still cooling baked goods with a furrowed brow.

“Babe, try this,” Lance says, nearly whacking Keith in the face with the neon pink food.

“I told you not to call me babe,” Keith says, but hesitantly takes the treat anyway. He takes a cautious bite before his eyes widen. “Why haven’t I had this delicacy before?” Keith whispers as if he just saw an angel.

“A true tragedy,” Lance says, nodding.

“Absolute blasphemy,” Hunk agrees, pushing the pan closer to the two boys. “These should be cool enough now,” Hunk says, grabbing four off the pan. “Go wild, these were for you two.”

They both immediately grab one and go to town, Hunk gleefully laughing at their enthusiasm. He sighs happily and turns out of the room, going to give one to the other applicants of the Castle.

“Hunk,” He suddenly hears, and turns to see Keith dashing out of the kitchen to where he stands currently. Keith places a hand on Hunk’s shoulder.

“Thank you,” He says, and Hunk has a feeling it’s not only for the pseudo garlic knots.

“No problem,” Hunk mumbles with a gentle smile. “I just want to see my friends happy.”

Keith gives him a smile, squeezes his shoulder, and turns back into the kitchen.

Hunk smiles even brighter. Keith willingly initiating contact is something that doesn't happen often, particularly if it's for thanking.

Understanding how Keith acts has helped Hunk realise just how thankful Keith truly is.

"Lance," Keith mumbles, looking away from his tablet with a furrowed brow.

Lance hums, still painting his toenails.

"I'm sorry."

Lance freezes and slowly glances towards Keith.

"For what…?" He questions nervously.

"I'm not breaking up with you!" Keith suddenly shouts, realising how the connotations could sound.

"Okay?" Lance asks with a laugh, but Keith can see how his shoulders have relaxed. "Thank you?"

"I just-" Keith continues, frowning again. "I'm sorry I stopped you from flirting all those times."

Lance gapes at Keith.

"Is that why you treat me like glass sometimes?"

Keith cringes.

"Yeah. I just, I could've, like, killed you," Keith mumbles, eyes watering.

"You didn't know," Lance mumbles, dropping everything to hug his boyfriend. "You couldn't have known."

"My stupid jealousy could've gotten you killed, that's not okay."

"Jealousy?" Lance questions, incredulous. "What do you mean-" he freezes. "Oh. You stopped me from flirting because you wanted me to flirt with you~," Lance says, teasing.

"Fuck off," Keith mumbles into Lance's chest.

"Nah, it's sweet," Lance says, shrugging. "Besides, while I technically need to fuck to live, if I had any say in it, I definitely wouldn't have fucked anybody but you."

"How romantic," Keith drawls sarcastically, pulling his head back.

"It is!" Lance squawks out.

Keith rolls his eyes with a soft smile, before his brow furrows again.

"What would have happened if you were let out of the pod and nobody was there?" Keith asks.

"I would've died," Lance says, shrugging.

"You-" Keith blinks, shocked. "You said that so casually, like your life doesn't matter."

"C'mon, Keith," Lance says, rolling his eyes with a smile. "I'm scum of the earth- er, universe. I am the manifestation of a sin."

Keith gapes at him, horrified.

"You're- you're not," Keith whispers, appalled. "Lance-"

"I've heard it all before," Lance says, rolling his eyes.

"Who told you that?" Keith questions, starting to get pissed. Who could ever hurt the bright boy in front of him, with oceans for eyes and mahogany hair?

"An old friend," Lance says, shrugging.

"Some friend," Keith hisses, venomous. "You're none of those things, Lance. You light up my entire universe."

"Who's romantic now?" Lance questions nervously. His smile is bright, but it seems like it's a losing battle to keep it that way.

"Lance," Keith mumbles, grabbing his shoulders. "Don't deflect this. You deserve the universe and so much more. I'd give you the multiverse, if I could."

"Of course you believe in the multiverse theory," Lance says, rolling his eyes.

"It makes sense," Keith deadpans, before he shakes himself out of that train of thought. "Stop changing the subject. You're amazing, Lance, why can't you see that?"

"Because I'm an idiot?"

"Only for not realising how amazing you are and how you hold this entire team together."

Lance huffs and crosses his arms.

Keith contemplates a few words in his head, wondering if he should say them.

"I love you," he blurts out. There goes caution.

Lance stiffens in Keith's arms before slowly turning around.

"You… love… me?" He quietly asks.

"I do," Keith whispers in his ear, nerves erratic.

"How-" Lance stutters. "I'm a monster."

"You're a damn gorgeous and kind monster, then," Keith says. "One that I definitely wouldn't mind being around for the rest of my life, romance or no."

"I-" Lance stutters, before stuffing his face into Keith's chest and muttering something incoherent.

"What'd you say?" Keith asks softly.

"I love you, too, asshole," Lance grumbles.

Keith pulls him into a kiss.

"Wait, so, how often do you have to have sex?" Pidge questions, scrutinising the new couple.

Keith sputters for a few moments before his expression turns contemplative.

"I actually want to know the answer to that," Keith says, turning to his boyfriend.

"Uh," Lance says. "To stay alive? Three months. To actually live instead of being a walking corpse? Probably once every two weeks."

Keith and Pidge stare at him blankly.

"Dude," Pidge says. "No wonder you used to sneak out all the time at the Garrison."

"We're gonna have to fuck every two weeks?" Keith asks.

"Don't act like you don't want to," Lance says with a cheeky smile, elbowing Keith's gut.

"Fuck off!"

"Only if I can fuck you," Lance says with a wink.

Pidge fake retches.

"Look, I'm not sure how to say this," Shiro says, sitting on a stool.

"Are- are you about to give me the shovel talk?" Lance questions incredulously.

"Safe sex is important," Shiro replies, completely serious.

"I've fucked more individual people in my life than how many times you've fucked total."

"Okay fuck this," Shiro says, and storms out. "Ask Coran for condoms, see you never."

"Good talk!" Lance calls out to Shiro's retreating back.