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he really regrets wearing heels.
despite trying to look taller, everybody still bullied him. and to make matters even worse, while he was sulking by the void river, his decision to kick a rock in the most edgy, contemplative matter only caused him to trip like an idiot... and now he's been floating in the void for what? an hour now?
he's hungry. really hungry.
hey, whatever supreme deity is up there, he thinks, raising his arms to the speckled sky above. if you get me out of here i promise i'll never wear heels again! and i'll do all my homework and be a good student!
and maybe god is real, because the moment after he "prayed," a flash of silver descends from the skies, latches onto his shirt collar, and it yanks him up towards the direction in which it appeared from. in an instant, he bursts out from the vacant void and lands on a grassy field, face planting right into the greenery.
from beside him, he hears what sounds like a surprised gasp and a voice exclaiming, "what in the- how?! "
he feels the latch on his collar unhook, and a hand touches his shoulder, lightly shaking him. he freezes, unsure of how to react to this stranger.
"oh dear—" the voice mutters, before projecting, "hey, kid— are you hurt?"
kid. kid. kid . the word "kid" travels through his ear and stabs into his brain like a needle, causing him to push himself up, angrily shooting back, "I'LL KILL YOU! I'M NOT A KID!" (he's pretty sure he heard his voice crack while yelling, but he really hopes that it's just a figment of his imagination.)
as he turns up to see the face over him, he notices a man dressed in green armor wearing a helmet, furrowed eyebrows showing through the transparent visor. the man seems to ignore the threat, because he only asks, "what were you doing in there– how long have you been in there for?! you look so thin..."
he only blinks at the stranger, having never been more insulted before. i. i’ve always been like this. and i’ve only been in there for. an hour.
and also, why is this man so fucking big? he swears that this green dude must at least be two times his size– that’s not normal, right?
watching his blank face, the man tilts his own head to the side, as if confused towards the silence. “are you understanding what i’m saying? do you speak our language?”
finally sick of this large man’s babbling, he rolls his eyes and grumbles a response (not without lowering his voice a pitch, of course), “yes, i know what you’re saying. will you stop that, now?”
the man’s eyes do soften slightly, though the general look of concern still hangs stagnant on the visible eyebrows. it pisses him off.
“hey, to answer your question,” he grins smugly, trying his absolute hardest to assert at least some amount of dominance. standing up, he crosses his arms and attempts to stand up taller despite his rock-kicking leg absolutely screaming bloody murder to him. “i jumped in there as a test of my power! which i obviously passed!”
raising an unimpressed eyebrow, the armored man only asks, “were you not taught that the void is a dangerous place that only specialized individuals can survive in?”
uh. shit. i did not know that.
“w-well, of course i knew!” he flat out lies, brain stumbling around like a child on ice skates. “it- it just goes to show how strong i am! the void didn’t do shit to me! if anything, it only made me a little hungry from how long i managed to stay in there! ”
“sure, alright…” the man squints his eyes, but they promptly widen again at the realization of what he just hears. “and hey! watch your profanity!”
***
xisuma decides to take the kid back to his base in the end.
the kid said some stuff about how “he will now be jumping back through the void in order to return to his rightful home to do Powerful Stuff,” and that xisuma should “just leave now before he gets in the way.” to which xisuma responded by taking out an apple, and the kid went nuts.
as the kid followed after him on their way back to his base, xisuma also realized that the kid ran with a limp, leading him to suspect that maybe the child just fell into a void chasm by accident. it was still surprising how he turned out to be… relatively fine, though. depends on how one defines “fine.”
and now xisuma lets the kid loose into his food storage, which probably isn't a great idea, but he can’t turn back now.
as the kid attacks the food chests with an abnormally high amount of violence, xisuma sits down on a box, watching this… thing with interest.
the kid, just like him, wore a similar armored outfit– but it had a red-based color scheme compared to his green. from the back, xisuma could see that the kid had long, white hair with ram horns curling out, and from what he could remember upon first meeting, he knew the kid had nearly ashy-pale skin, pointy ears, and red scleras. on top of that, he also had heeled boots with concerningly high platforms (is this what made him trip?). he’s certainly… different, to say the least. xisuma can’t think of any hermit looking any remotely close to this, and they’re all a diverse bunch as well.
“by the way, kid,” xisuma remarks, watching the mystery child’s head perk up and turn around. “what’s your name?”
“for the last time, i’m not a kid! ” the (and xisuma does not change his mind in the slightest) kid retorts, pointing a carrot at xisuma accusingly. “and my name is xisuma, with an ‘x!’ learn it!”
now that’s a name he definitely recognizes.
“my name is xisuma as well…” (the real and original) xisuma cautiously stands up from his spot, slowly making his way towards the white-haired individual. “this cannot be just a coincidence.”
xisuma-the-second only shrugs, then tauntingly leans back against a chest. “well then, get a new name! this one’s already mine.”
“no way!” xisuma narrows his eyes, eyeing the child, who’s now back to reaching in the food chest. “i knew it was weird when i fished someone who looked a lot like me out of the void, when i’m the only one here who can get close to the abyss without being hurt. then you come and say that we have the exact same name!”
“i don’t see why that’s my problem.” fakesuma fishes out an item from the chest and bites into it, directing his gaze away from realsuma. “oh shit, this golden carrot is amazing!”
xisuma facepalms. “that’s yellow dye.”
it seems like this kid is troubled, in more ways than another. xisuma can’t think of any sane person who would be so careless as to trip into the void– even someone with protective powers like himself would still be cautious around such a dangerous entity. and this xisuma bit into yellow dye without a second thought. if that isn’t a sign of issues, then he doesn’t know what is.
sighing and shaking his head, xisuma watches the child continue to eat the yellow dye in a mixture of shock and disgust. he needs to do something about this strange individual… he can’t just leave someone around while working on his base. that could be dangerous for both of them. and who knows if the respawn mechanics work the same for this kid?
“maybe that evil school or whatever doc mentioned could be useful…” xisuma contemplates as he watches his tiny counterpart reach for yet another piece of yellow dye. “though the ‘evil’ in name doesn’t sound very promising, it’s really the only option around here that i could send this guy to while i figure out what to do with him.”
***
“so you’re telling me…” grian strokes his chin, mimicking a beard shape. “you fished evil xisuma out of the void? and now you’re taking care of him?”
“that is the baseline, sure…” xisuma nods over at evil xisuma, who rushes around in the back trying to catch butterflies for his evil biology class. “i’m still not sure what that ‘evil school’ is all about, but he seems to be alright, aside from a few struggling classes.”
grian launches himself up into the air, flapping his wings twice before landing elegantly on xisuma’s shoulder. he then raises his flat palm over his forehead to look over at the teen cursing in some sort of an abyssal language while chasing after the winged insect, giggling at the amusing sight.
“you know?” grian turns to look at his armored friend with a playful grin that spreads to the sides of his cheeks. “for someone with ‘evil’ in his name, he’s not that evil at all! i’d say he’s more funny than bad , really.”
“actually, he decided to go by his ‘evil’ title to distinguish himself from me,” xisuma explained, rubbing the side of his helmet as if to jog his memory. “he told me that evil school gives out the ‘evil’ title to graduates, sort of like a doctor or phd of sorts. though it is quite clear that he is far from graduating…”
grian watches evil xisuma trip over his shoes one more time and bursts out into laughter.
“i’m gonna go mess with his evil homework,” he announces, smugly shifting into a takeoff position. “i think it would be hilarious.”
“please don’t. i don’t want the evil principal calling me over him failing an evil class again.”
ignoring xisuma, grian counts down, “three… two… one!” then bursts off towards the now cursing evil xisuma.
as the scene of grian lifting evil xisuma up by the shoulders and the teen throwing a fit plays out in front of xisuma, the server admin sighs and crosses his arms.
at least it looks like school is distracting evil xisuma from trying to destroy the hermitcraft server, though his power does seem to grow by every season. xisuma does worry for the server reset arriving soon, but he’ll just need to go with the flow, right? besides, he is quite interested to see what new “evil” schemes evil xisuma will come up with in the future.
xisuma huffs, a small smile creeping its way up his face as evil xisuma swats around his net to ward off the cackling harpy plaguing him. when xisuma hears evil xisuma yell out an unprintable swear in the void language, he relaxes in relief knowing that this silly kid won’t be capable of doing anything super terrible anyway.
there’s no way it’ll be something big , he thinks. ex has always been the same. i bet it’ll be something silly, like paintball. or capitalism. either way, i’m sure i can deal with it like i always have.