Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

The last thing you remember is going to bed. Curling up under your blankets, the familiar texture of your pillow under your cheek as you rolled into your favorite sleeping position. A typical night, nothing out of the ordinary. There was absolutely nothing you could think of that would cause any sort of weird shit to happen during the night. You didn’t even have any weird dreams. 

Honestly though, you might feel better if you had. 

When your eyes open again, a girl is standing over you.

You don’t know who she is, and you’re confused at first. Her hair is purple and choppy, her big wet eyes looking you over with worry. She perks up as you lift your head with a groan - the world is spinning, there’s soft ground underneath you, and your heart starts pounding as you finally process that this is not your bed. 

“D-daijoubu desu ka?” The girl leans closer, her purple eyes filled with concern. Still reeling, your brow knits together as you look up at her. “What?”

“Ah!” She yelps, seeming to panic for a moment. “Ah, ah…” She thinks hard for a moment before saying slowly, with an accent, “A-are you okay?”

Too frazzled to answer, you look around, trying to sit up. She places a firm hand on your chest and pushes you back down. “Stay, please.”

“What’s happening?” You look up at her, confused. “Where- how did I-?” The sand underneath your body is warm. The bright sun hurts your eyes, but you look over her again. She looks like a cosplayer, a really good one at that. She looks exactly like Mikan Tsumiki from SDR2. So, are you at a convention with a sudden bout of amnesia, or…?

“Tsumiki-san, daijoubu?” A voice calls, and your heart stops. You recognize that voice.

The girl looks up and starts talking, and you follow her gaze. Across the sand, hands shoved in his jacket pockets, is Nagito Komaeda. The white, messy hair, the long green jacket and the weird zipper shoes… At first, you’re convinced he must just be a really good cosplayer, but when he opens his mouth to reply to whatever the girl just said, your stomach churns. There’s no doubt. That’s his voice from the Japanese version of the game.

There’s no way, right? There’s no way in hell you just got fucking isekai’d?

The girl looks back at you. “Do you speak Japanese?” She asks, clasping her hands over her chest. You think hard for a moment, trying to remember the word for ‘small’. “Uh, chiisai ?” You’re not sure if that word should be used in this context, but it’s the best you can do. She seems to relax a bit at that, taking you by the arm. “Up, up.” Following her lead, she helps you stand. You wobble a bit, but her hold on you is firm.

She says something to Komaeda, who says something in response, but you can’t pick up on anything they’re talking about. You feel nauseous. Fucking christ, you got isekai’d into a version of the game where they don’t speak English. You’re gonna fucking die.

“Ah, c-calm, calm!” Tsumiki frantically shouts, placing her palm flat on your chest. It’s only then you realize how heavily you’re breathing, your heart is pounding so hard in your chest it’s physically painful. Komaeda comes closer, and from behind him comes a boy with a haircut so shitty you have to assume he’s Hinata. They all seem confused and concerned, but they aren’t freaking out the way you are. It makes sense. They have no clue what’s going to happen in the next month or so, but you do.

They’re all talking, partially to each other and partially to you, but even if you were better at speaking Japanese you’d be too distressed to figure out what the fuck they were saying. Your chest hurts, you feel like you’re suffocating, like you can’t draw a deep enough breath. You can feel your body shaking, and seeing how bad a state you’re in, Tsumiki gently tugs you downward. “Down, back down!”

You sit cross-legged in the sand and double over, tears beginning to blur your vision. Shit, you’re having a panic attack. This is the worst fucking time, you need to be calm, you need to find a way home, you really aren’t supposed to be here at all. They’re all still talking, but you aren’t paying attention anymore. Squeezing your eyes shut, you try to steady your breathing to no avail. 

Suddenly, a soft, gentle hand rests on the top of your head, breaking through your panicky haze just enough to hear a light, airy voice speaking to you. “Hey, it’s alright. Just breathe, okay?”

“I-I-” You mumble through your sobs. “I-I can’t, I can’t, it’s all too…” You trail off, grabbing at your hair and yanking as hard as you could. The voice says something in Japanese that you don’t understand, then another hand grabs your wrist and gently untangles your fingers from your hair. “Hey, could you look at me please?”

Lifting your head slightly, face still damp with tears, you realize the girl talking to you is Nanami. She smiles gently at you. “I want you to breathe with me, okay? Can you do that?” You swallow hard and nod, and you follow along with some breathing exercises. You recognize the one she’s using, breathing in for 8 seconds, holding for 5 seconds, and breathing out for 8 seconds. An old therapist taught you this one. Makes sense, since she’s a super-advanced therapy AI.

She looks so strange, sitting here before you in 3D space. Her face is slightly rounder than it looked in game, and she’s chubbier, with freckles adorning her face. As your racing heart begins to wind down into a more bearable rhythm, you force yourself to not think about the fact that a fictional character is helping to pull you out of a panic attack. 

Once your shaking has subsided, you take another look around. Tsumiki, Komaeda, and Hinata are all still here, watching nervously. They’ve moved away from you, probably giving Nanami space to calm you down.  

“I-I, uh-” You clear your throat, voice still shaky. “I- can you tell them I’m sorry for causing a scene, please?” You look up at Nanami, who nods before looking at the others and translating for you. Hinata, looking exasperated, says something in response while Komaeda chuckles softly behind his hand. Nanami returns her gaze to you. “He says it’s fine, that you shouldn’t be sorry, and they’re all just worried about you.” Taking both your hands, she gives them a gentle squeeze. “Can you tell me your name?”

You nod softly and tell her, and she relays the information to the others. It’s strange - when she speaks Japanese, she sounds exactly like her Japanese voice actor, but speaking English she sounds like her English one. Tsumiki asks something, and you make out the word ‘doko’ , meaning ‘where.’ You aren’t surprised when Nanami then asks, “Where are you from?”

“I’m- wait, I can say this one. Watashi wa Amerikajin desu .” You look over at Tsumiki, who nods and smiles, seeming much calmer now that the situation is slightly more under control. “Do you know how you got here?” Nanami asks, and your brow furrows as you look back at her. “... No, I’m sorry. I went to bed last night and woke up here.”

You look at the golden sand beneath you while she translates. You’ve never been near the ocean before. Does it count if it’s in a simulation?

Before you can get too lost in thought, Nanami gently tugs at your hands. “Okay, I’m gonna take you to your cottage and fill you in on what’s going on. Is that alright?” Swallowing hard, you nod and let her help you to your feet. “U-um, before we go, can you tell them I’m sorry one more time?” You nod in the other’s direction, who are already talking amongst themselves. “I-I just feel bad for freaking out on them like that.”

“You have every reason to be scared.” Nanami tilts her head. “They understand, you don’t need to constantly apologize.”

She tugs you away from the beach, but still feeling guilty, you look over your shoulder at the others. “G-gomennasai!” You call out, and they all glance at you before laughing softly amongst themselves. Just before you turn away, Komaeda gives you a thumbs up.

Nanami holds your hand as the two of you walk to the cottages. Her skin is warm and soft, and it feels so undeniably real. You can be honest with her, right? Even if she’s programmed so she can’t talk about the simulation, she’ll understand, and be able to relay some stuff to Usami, right?

“Uh, excuse me?” You start meekly. “I’m sorry, but what would you like me to call you?”

“Oh, sorry, I forgot to introduce myself.” She squeezes your hand. “My name’s Chiaki Nanami. It’s a pleasure to meet you.”

“U-uh, thanks. Should I call you Nanami-san?” You ask, and she thinks for a moment. “Yeah, that works. I’ll help you figure out what honorifics to use for everyone, if you want.”

“That would be amazing, thanks.” You’re still anxious, your brain is still running a mile a minute, but you can think more clearly now. The two of you approach the cottages, and you notice there are two new ones - one on the boy’s side and one on the girl’s side. You glance between the two sides briefly, before Nanami gestures to the girl’s side. “You should take the one closer to me, in case you need help or something on short notice.”

You nod as the two of you walk towards the door. She glances at you. “You don’t happen to have a key, do you?” 

You pat your pockets - you only just now noticed you aren’t in your pajamas anymore - and from your right pocket, you pull out a small key. “I don’t know how this got here…”

“That’s alright. Please open the door.” She gestures, and you unlock the door and step inside.

It’s not particularly glamorous - about on par with what you remember Hinata’s cottage looking like in-game. There’s the addition of a small kitchenette with a mini-fridge, and some washer and dryer units next to the bathroom. A TV with a GameCube hooked up, and a stack of games next to it, along with your old 3DS. Wait…

You walk over and pick up the 3DS, opening it. The hinge is broken, causing the top screen to flop around, and upon closer inspection you realize it’s broken in the exact same way your 3DS at home is. A shiver rolls through you. Creepy. Taking a deep breath, you turn around to face Nanami. “Nanami-san, I need to tell you something. Could you please close the door?”

She nods and shuts it behind her, and the two of you move to the small couch under a window. You grip the fabric of your shirt, nervously fidgeting with it. “How do I put this… I, uh, I know… what this is.”

She stares at you a moment before tilting her head. “... Do you?”

“Well- to an extent, yes.” You swallow hard. “I know that we’re inside a simulation called the Neo World Program. I know about the Tragedy, and I know about all the Remnants of Despair, and I know that there are people from the Future Foundation out there, watching us.”

“Weird.” She hums. “What makes you say all that?”

Right. She’s programmed so she’s unable to acknowledge the simulation. “I can’t explain exactly how without you thinking I’m crazy. But…” You point to the camera in the corner of the room. “I know that Naegi is out there, watching us. Does he understand me? Does he know any English?”

“I wouldn’t know about anything like that.” Her face is very serious and she glances away, trying to find a way to say what she wants to while getting around her programming. “I won’t think you’re crazy, if you’ll please explain. I’ll tell Usami everything, if you want.”

“Yeah, she’ll need to know.” You think for a moment, biting your lip, then heave a heavy sigh, deciding to bite the bullet. If there’s anyone here who has a chance of understanding you, it’s her.

“You’re a gamer, yeah?” She nods. “So you must have played some mystery games, right?” Another nod, and you swallow hard. “I come from a world where… this…” You gesture vaguely around the room to nothing in particular. “Is all part of a mystery game called Danganronpa. Actually, this is the sequel game, Super Danganronpa 2. I’ve played it before, I could tell you the names of everyone here, I could tell you the names of all the survivors from the real Hope’s Peak Academy, and I can tell you how the real Chiaki Nanami died.” You’re speaking so quickly your brain can hardly keep up, but there’s so much to say in so little time. You pause for air, and she takes a moment to process what you’ve said so far.

“... So, if this is a video game… how are you here?” Her head tilts, hair pin glinting in the sunlight. 

“I really don’t know. I wish I did.” You shook your head. “Some kind of cosmic screw-up? A portal between dimensions? I couldn’t tell you. All I know is I’m here now and- and I need to warn you before it’s too late.” You swallow hard, pausing for another breath before continuing. “Junko Enoshima is within the program. Some kind of messed up AI she made before her death ended up in here, and we don’t have much time before she starts another killing game.”

“I see.” Nanami purses her lips, and you give her time to think. You’re throwing a lot at her at once, but you have the biggest part out of the way. Maybe, with Usami’s help and whoever else is outside, they can stop this before it starts.

“I just relayed everything to Naegi-sama!” From thin air, as if she heard your thoughts, Usami pops into the room, waving her magic wand, although she’s sweating and seems pretty anxious, based on how she’s twisting it in her paws. “H-he says he’ll look into it.”

“I- h-how did you-?” You stutter, and Usami answers before you can finish. “Chiaki and I share a memory database; once you gave her permission to relay everything to me, I could watch through her eyes and translate everything to Naegi-sama.”

“Got it.” You groan softly, running a hand over your face. “Look, I don’t know how I got here or why, but what I do know is I can help. If things play out like they did in the game, maybe I can change things so they won’t end up so bad.”

“We’ll need all the help we can get, if what you’re saying is true.” Nanami nods. “Alright. I’m counting on you to do what you can. It’s going to be hard with the language barrier, but…” Her eyes glistened with determination. “We’re going to get through this. Everyone will end up alright.”

You nod, standing up and rubbing your eyes. “Alright, alright, let me think… right about now, Hinata and Komaeda should be introducing themselves to everyone, all around the Island. That takes a bit, but afterwards, Usami will say they’ve earned a prize and everyone will go swimming in the ocean.”

You take a few steps forward, beginning to pace around the room as you try to recall the events of the prologue. “While everyone is swimming, suddenly storm clouds will appear, and that’s when Monokuma will call everyone to Jabberwock Park. He gets in a fight with Usami, breaks her wand, and the-” You cut off, stopping dead in your tracks and staring straight ahead.

“What?” Nanami stands, hurrying over. “What is it? Are you alright?”

“I’m…” You blink slowly, then look down at your body. You grab the neckline of your shirt and pull it away from your body, peering down at your torso. Then you lift your eyes back up to the full-length mirror in front of you.

“Oh my god, I’m…” Your voice trembles and your heart picks up the pace a bit. You swallow hard. Nanami looks between you and the mirror, brows knitted together in worry. “What is it? Please tell me what’s wrong.”

“I-I’m… fifteen again.”

You can’t deny it. The you that was reflected in the mirror had the same haircut, same favorite outfit from when you were fifteen years old. You cringe. You had terrible taste.

“You’re… huh?” Usami pokes your leg. “What do you mean?”

You point to the mirror with a shaky hand. “Th-that’s… that’s not me- well, it is me, but I- I’m not fifteen anymore! But this is-” You touch your hair and tug at your clothes, as if confirming for yourself that the reflection was actually how you looked. “This is my fifteen year old body. I- wait!” You rush toward the mirror, pushing your hair away from your forehead and looking closely. From the corner of your eye, you see Nanami and Usami watching on, but you’re too busy to care. You whirl around and approach Nanami, pointing at the center of your forehead, right between your eyebrows. “Here, right here. Do you see it?”

“Um…” She leans in, looking closely. “Is that… a really tiny scar?”

“Yes!” Your chest shakes with laughter, despite the situation being anything but funny to you. “This scar - on my actual body, it’s completely faded away! I got it when I was maybe four or five years old, but here it is! Plain as day! I haven’t seen it in forever!” You rest your hands on top of your head and stare at the floor. “Holy fuck, I’m fifteen again!”

“Language!” Usami scolds, and you shake your head. “Sorry, sorry, I just- I’m really fifteen years old. I’m-” A frown finally settles on your face and you lower your arms to hug yourself. “I’m really fifteen years old?”

“Probably so you won’t stand out. It would be strange if you looked like an adult among a bunch of high schoolers.” Usami points out, bunny ears twitching. 

“That’s pointless, I’m the only American among a bunch of Japanese students. I stand out no matter what I look like or how old I am.” You groan. “Wait, is Sonia European? She’s blonde, I know that much. Where is Novoselic, anyway?”

Nanami removes her backpack, pulling out a small cat-shaped notepad. Cute. “Speaking of which…” She mutters as she writes something down. After a moment, she turns the notepad over and shows it to you. On top, there’s writing in hiragana, with the roman pronunciation written smaller just underneath, and then under that there’s an English translation. It’s just ‘hello’ . You furrow your brow. “I can already say konnichiwa. ”

“Not the point.” Nanami rolls her eyes and flips to a new page. “I figured, if you have, like, flash cards or something with simple phrases, it’ll help you communicate with everyone on the Island a bit better.”

“God, I wish I knew more Japanese…” You sit down on the bed, burying your face in your hands. “Of course I’m the unlucky bitch who ended up in the non-translated version of the game…”

“Language!” Usami scolds, her voice a higher pitch this time. “Sorry.” You mumble into your hands.

“This is… going to be difficult. Not just for you, but for everyone.” Nanami walks towards you, stopping about a foot away, like she’s hesitant to go near you. “Just… please know that I’m here for you if you need anything. We can get through this together. We can save everyone, I know it.” She clutches the notepad to her chest. Naegi must have programmed her with his unwavering sense of hope, if she can see a light at the end of this tunnel.

She finally moves to sit next to you. “Now, let’s think of things you might need to say when I’m not around…”

Chapter Text

Nanami gave you her little notepad after filling some of the pages with words and phrases she thought would be useful. As long as you keep the notepad on you, even if Nanami isn’t around and nobody can understand you, you’ll be able to communicate basic things like ‘where is the restroom’ and ‘i need help with something.’

At some point, you asked Nanami why she was fluent in both English and Japanese, but Usami ended up answering for her. “This program is designed for use by anyone, all around the world, to help them through their problems! We speak every language fluently.”

It made sense, with them being AI and all.

Afterwards, Nanami told you to rest in your cabin, and if anything happened she would come get you. Usami gave you a small tablet and blipped out of existence, something you would never get used to, and you locked your door behind Nanami after she left, leaving you alone in the cottage.

The quiet felt heavy, but you weren’t sure what, if anything, you could do about it right now. You were told to rest, but how could anyone rest right now? How could you try to relax when any moment now, the killing game would begin? You were stuck in a place with nobody you knew, and very few people who spoke the same language as you. 

You were frustrated. You wanted to go out there and do something, find some way to stop Enoshima before she got the chance to fuck everything up, but there was nothing you could do. You had warned Naegi, and now both Nanami and Usami would be on the lookout. You just hoped it was enough. You needed to start thinking of a Plan B, something to do just in case everything that could go wrong, did go wrong.

Peeking inside the closet, you were both grateful and creeped out to find that it resembled your current-day closet, not the one from when you were fifteen. You quickly changed into something more suited to your current tastes, deciding to ignore how weird it was that all of this just seemed to appear out of thin air. It’s a simulation. Anything goes.

You’re just about to try and fix your awful haircut when there’s a knock at your door. Fuck, already? Grasping the notepad in your hands, you walk over and pull the door open, and based on the long blonde hair and blue dress, it’s Sonia who’s at your door. Her eyes light up and she grabs your hands before you can react, giggling. “They were not kidding! There really is an American on the Island!”

“Huh?” You blink. She’s speaking English? Just like Nanami, she sounds exactly like her English VA. Unlike all the others you’ve met so far, she also has distinctly European features. You have to admit, she’s very pretty. There isn’t a single wrinkle on her clothes, and her golden hair flows down her back like she’s never had a tangle in her life.

“Ah, my deepest apologies!” She releases your hands, clasping her own over her chest. “My name is Sonia Nevermind. Pleased to make your acquaintance.”

“Uh, same here.” Stepping the rest of the way out of your cottage, you close the door behind you. “Sorry, but I wasn’t aware anyone else spoke English..?”

“I am fluent in over thirty languages.” She explains. “Should you ever need assistance in communicating with others, I will gladly lend you my aid!”

“That’s very kind. Thank you.” You smile at her, relaxing a bit. “Can I ask why you came over here…?”

“Right! It is just…” She wrings her hands nervously. “... I have never met an American teenager before. Learning about other cultures is so much fun, and I thought perhaps I could ask you about what it is like?”

Huh. You think you remember her saying something about her fascination with other cultures, but you hadn’t gotten around to doing all of her freetime events yet. “Um, I guess…? I’m not sure what you would want to hear about though. My life is pretty boring.”

“Nonsense! I have watched many American dramas and TV shows!” She puffs up like a cat, her voice coming out firm, as if you’re being scolded. She’s intense when she’s excited… “There is lots of wide open land, and men who ride on horseback, and spies who must blow up buildings for the good of the nation!”

Right. A big part of her character was that she’s naive. No wonder she believed all that. Do they not teach ‘don’t believe what you see on TV’ in Novoselic? “That’s… fiction, Sonia. Oh, wait, so you want me to use an honorific for you?”

“No! I would like you to remain true to your culture!” She states. You’ve never considered yourself cultured, and it’s weird to hear her say that about Americans. “Well, I guess, but there’s something I want you to understand first.”

“Hm?” Her head tilts, eyebrows raised. She’s very pretty. You clear your throat. “The US is… pretty big, y’know? The culture is really different depending on what part of the country you’re from.”

“I see…” She hums softly. “Then I will learn all I can from you, and when we get off this Island, I will venture forth to learn even more!”

A pang of guilt shoots through you. She’ll never get that chance, will she? The world outside is in ruins, and what remains of humanity is struggling to pick up the pieces left behind by the Tragedy. And this girl, the one standing right in front of you and smiling so sweetly, she helped cause all that destruction.

Swallowing hard, you look away. “You do that.” You mutter dryly.

Seemingly unaware of your sudden mood drop, Sonia grabs your hand once more, gently tugging you down the boardwalk. “Come! Let us explore as we talk. Does that not sound fun?”

Forcing a smile and trying not to think about the world that awaits Sonia, you nod softly. “Yeah. Let’s go.”

The two of you walk away from the cottages, towards the hotel, Sonia humming a tune softly as you go. As you’re walking around the pool, you notice something in the water. Pausing, you lean a bit closer to look at it. It’s small, round, and squirming, but it’s so wet and frantic you can’t figure out what it is. A squirrel? Are there squirrels on tropical islands? It doesn’t have a poofy tail. A tailless squirrel?

“Sonia?” You call out, but looking around you realize she’s gone. She must have not noticed when you stopped. Sighing softly, you approach the pool’s edge and crouch down, rolling up your sleeve and reaching towards the animal. It’s just barely outside your arm’s reach. You try splashing at the water to get it to float closer, but that only appears to distress it more.

Looking around, you spot a stick a few feet away, crawling over to grab it before hurrying back. Using the stick, you gently coax the animal towards you until you can get your hand under it, lifting it safely out of the water and setting it down on the concrete next to you. It lays there, its little chest rising and falling rapidly. Now that you’re looking closer, it kind of looks like a wet rat.

Someone calls your name behind you, and when you look over your shoulder, you see it’s Sonia. Guess she finally noticed you were missing. She hurries over to you. “Did you fall?”

“What? No. Look.” Scooping up the animal and cradling it gently in your palms, you stand up and show it to Sonia. “This little guy was struggling in the water, so I fished him out.”

She gasps, clapping her hands over her mouth. “Tanaka-kun’s missing comrade…!”

You blink. “Huh?”

“Apologies, but we have to return this hamster right away! Please follow me and do not get lost this time.” She turns and heads towards the hotel with you right behind her, still cradling the animal. “I-I wasn’t lost- wait, this thing is a hamster?” You look down at it again. It really just looks like a fat, miserable, wet rat. Then again, you’ve never seen a hamster in person before. Maybe underneath the fluff they’re just really rat-looking. They’re rodents, right?

You follow Sonia into the hotel lobby, then upstairs into the restaurant. The hamster has started getting its bearings, standing on your hands instead of laying there dramatically. A couple people have gathered here, which immediately makes your anxiety levels spike. You keep close to Sonia as she crosses the room and taps a crouched boy on the shoulder. He stands and turns to you two.

Gundham Tanaka is surprisingly intimidating in real life. He’s pretty tall, and you’re sure even without the excessive amount of eyeliner, his eyes would still be pretty intense. When he looks at Sonia and says something, his chest is a deep, powerful rumble from within his chest. You remember him sounding kind of like a cartoon villain in the English version. Maybe to people who actually speak Japanese, he still sounds kinda cartoony.

Saying something in reply, Sonia gestures to you, which you take as your cue to hold out the sad little hamster. Tanaka’s eyes widen and he shouts at you, forehead creasing as he bares his teeth. You take a small step back, glancing at Sonia. “What’s happening?”

“ Iie, iie, Tanaka-kun! He thinks you kidnapped his comrade!” Sonia explains, frantically waving her hands. Your eyes widen and you frantically shake your head. “No, no! It was in the pool, I swear! Puru! Puru!” You point outside, in the direction you’re pretty sure the pool is. Tanaka eyes you suspiciously, and you extend your hands to him again. “Daijoubu desu ka?” If you’re right, he’ll know you’re asking if the hamster is okay.

Glancing between your face and hands, he gently takes the hamster from you and brings it close to his face, seeming to inspect it carefully. You wring your hands nervously as he chitters to it, before dropping it into his scarf and returning his gaze to you. “Arigato gozaimasu.” He says something after that, too, but you’re completely lost. Luckily, Sonia is right by your side. She sighs in relief. “He says thank you, and that he considers himself to be in your debt for rescuing one of his… um… forgive me, but I am not sure how to translate exactly what he said.” She taps her chin in thought. 

“Dark Devas of Destruction?” You blurt out before you can stop yourself. Shit, you shouldn’t know that. Sonia’s eyes light up. “Yes! I am surprised you caught that.” 

You just smile and laugh awkwardly. Thank god she’s too kind to be suspicious.

“Oh! Uh… anata… namae wa… ?” You look at Tanaka, realizing you have to actually ask these people their names before you just start calling them that, or else it’ll look weird. Tanaka smirks. “Ah, Gundham Tanaka desu.” Again, he continues, and you pick up on absolutely nothing. You nod anyway, figuring it’s something dramatic about him being the son of Satan or something. “Tanaka-kun. Douzo yoroshiku.” You smile at him. He hums in response, folding his arms over his chest.

“Ah, Sonia-san!” You and Sonia turn in unison to follow the sound of the voice. Looks like Komaeda and Hinata have just reached the restaurant. She beams at the two of them, talking excitedly in Japanese and gesturing to you. Unsure of what she’s saying, you give an awkward wave as the two walk over. They talk with her for a moment, and during that time Hinata seems a bit suspicious of you, based on the look on his face. He’s the anxious type in the English translation of the game, so it makes sense he’d be concerned about a foreigner randomly appearing.

Sonia turns to you, pulling you out of your thoughts. “Can you introduce yourself to them?” You nod and tell them your name, which is relatively easy. “Douzo yoroshiku.”

“Ah, sore wa kakkoii desu ne, Hinata-kun?” Komaeda elbows Hinata, grinning. Even in real life his hair doesn’t make sense, but it looks less crunchy in 3D. Hinata says something in return that you can’t make out. Again, you’re lucky, because Sonia is right next to you. “He says he thinks it is strange that Hope’s Peak Academy enrolled an American student who can barely speak Japanese.” Hinata frantically says something else, and Sonia frowns. “Apparently I was not supposed to translate that part.”

You stifle your laughter. “No no, it’s alright. It is weird, come to think of it.” You might as well fake it. Maybe you can tell them you’re the Ultimate Exchange Student or some bullshit like that. The Ultimate Nap-Taker? The Ultimate FanArtist? You don’t draw as much as you used to, but you could probably pass for something like that if you used the language barrier to your advantage.

Sonia’s face gets stern all of a sudden and she says something to the two, causing them to suddenly look sheepish. You glance at Sonia in confusion, but she offers no context. She says something else and jerks her head in your direction, and Hinata abruptly turns to you. “H-hinata Hajime desu. Yoroshiku.”

Next to him, Komaeda pipes up right after. “Yoroshiku. Boku wa Komaeda Nagito da yo.”

You’ve heard that exact voice line before. It’s a bit freaky, how they all sound exactly the same… it kind of makes sense, but at the same time it constantly reminds you of your current situation.

Seeming satisfied, Sonia turns back to you. “Alright, let us introduce you to the rest of those around the Island. Even if you struggle to speak with everyone, it is important that we all become friends.”

Right. The hope shards or whatever they’re called. Usami told everyone once they collected enough of them, they would get to go home.

Come to think of it, when did Naegi plan to inform them of the fact that most of their homes and families were already dead and gone? Did he think that far ahead?

Sonia takes you by the arm and begins tugging you off. “Come now, we mustn't wait around!”

“Ah- uh, j-jaa ne, Hinata-kun, Komaeda-kun!” You call over your shoulder. You get a response, but Sonia already has you out the door.

Chapter Text

You spend some time with Sonia, and she helps you introduce yourself to a few people here and there. Most of the people you come across aren’t interested though. You’re pretty sure Kuzuryu threatened you, based on how quickly Sonia had you run away.

You got to introduce yourself to Tsumiki formally, and she was glad you were alright. You also ran into Saionji, and while you couldn’t make out most of what she said, you heard the word ‘baka’ in there more than once. Sonia lied and said she called you tall in an attempt to protect your feelings. In response, you pointed at her and said “Chiisai.” That really pissed her off, and she was still fuming when you and Sonia walked away.

Should you be picking fights with Saionji right now? No, but she started it, and even in the game she was kind of a bitch, so you don’t feel bad.

For a minute, walking around with Sonia in the sunshine, the soft sound of the ocean nearby, you almost forget what kind of situation you’re in. But of course, your peace of mind doesn’t last long, because through your Monopad, Usami’s face suddenly appears. She says something in Japanese, and even though you can’t translate it, your heart sinks. You already know what Sonia’s going to say when she turns to you.

Together, you make your way to the beach on the central Island. Luckily, you were already close by. There’s not many others around yet. Nidai and Owari are there already, and holy shit is he tall. He has to be at least 6’5. That’s terrifying. You stick as close to Sonia as humanly possible.

Slowly, more and more people join you on the beach, most of whom you haven’t been introduced to yet. Most of them don’t take much interest in you, more confused or excited about whatever Usami has planned for them once they all arrive. 

You jump when someone taps your shoulder, whirling around to find Nanami. You didn’t see her come up. Breathing a sigh of relief, you force a smile. “Sorry, you startled me.”

“It’s alright, it’s my fault.” She shrugs. Sonia tilts her head. “Nanami-san, you speak English too?”

Nanami nods. “Yeah, I learned it so I could play games that haven’t been translated to Japanese.” Good excuse. Sonia seems to accept it, nodding softly before she goes off somewhere, leaving you with Nanami. She smiles at you. “Have you noticed anything you think is interesting?”

You know what she’s asking. You don’t want to cause suspicion, just in case Sonia can still hear you, so you think hard, clearing your throat. “Uh, yeah actually. I’ve met a few people who weren’t standing where I expected them to be, if that makes sense.” Tsumiki shouldn’t have been on the beach with you when you woke up - she first appears in the supermarket. Tanaka should have been in the airport, not the restaurant. The differences were slight, but they were there.

“I see.” Nanami nods. “I’m sure it’s nothing to worry about.”

Komaeda and Hinata are the last to arrive - that’s to be expected. They talk to not-Togami, probably something about being late. You stand back to watch everything play out, nervously biting your nails.

Even though you don’t understand what’s being said, it plays out about how you expected it to. You get an Usami keychain, which you attach the little notepad to so you don’t lose it. Everyone else is disappointed, but honestly, it’s a little cute when it’s attached to a cat-shaped notepad. 

Once the swimsuits are brought out, everyone seems to light up, grabbing the bags and running off to go change. You stay behind with a few others, a pit forming in your stomach. You swallow hard. 

Nanami spots your worried expression and shuffles closer. “You aren’t gonna swim? I know it’s scary, but really, nobody here’s gonna bite. Maybe it’ll relax you.”

Smiling softly at her, you shake your head. “No, I’m good, thanks. Even if we all spoke the same language, I wouldn’t get in the water.” You don’t like wearing swimsuits, and you especially don’t like the idea of wearing a swimsuit around a bunch of strangers. Nanami hums softly, thinking for a moment. “... Can you not swim?”

“What? I can swim!” You raise an eyebrow. “I mean, I’m not great at it, but I won’t drown. It’s just…” You shift uncomfortably on your feet. “... I’ve never been to the ocean before. I wanna appreciate it from afar, y’know?”

“... I see.” She nods. “Can I see the notepad? I thought of some new phrases you might need.”

You hand it over and she starts writing. In the meantime, you stare off over the waves. It’s so strange, watching the water roll over itself so realistically. There should be two layers of fiction between your eyes and this bright blue sky, but here you are. It’s as real as you are, and that messes with your head. If you’re in a world where all this is real, then do you have a counterpart in it? Is there some kind of paradox happening, where two of you exist on the same plane at the same time?

Do you simply not exist in this world? Are you not supposed to? How long before the universe realizes it made a mistake? What happens then? Do you blip out of existence? Do you wake up at home?

Someone says your name and pulls you from your distressing train of thought. You blink and look away from the sea. Hinata looks around, seeming just as anxious as you are, then says something you don’t understand.

“He’s asking if you’re feeling alright.” Nanami translates. You give him a short, curt nod and a weak thumbs up, but your hand shakes. Sighing softly, you lower your hand while he says something else. “He says you should be honest if you’re scared, and that he’s scared too.”

You look at him, another pang of guilt shooting though you. Hinata was anxious as hell in the game through the whole thing, but he arguably had the worst news in store for him. Just like you, once the simulation ended, there was every chance he would just… stop existing. It was different when he was fictional, but now he’s a living, breathing boy standing right here. He’s got downturned, almond-shaped eyes, and his brow is furrowed so his forehead creases, and he’s got a couple freckles on his cheeks and arms. He’s so detailed, just like a real person. Because right now, he is.

Nanami shows him the notepad, and his eyebrows raise, opening his mouth in a soft “ah” as he reads whatever she wrote. She hands it back to you. She’s added a few more phrases, leaving it open on the last one.

‘I am afraid of the ocean.’

“I am not afraid of the ocean!” Your face heats up and your voice raises an octave. “I just want to appreciate it from far away, where nothing that lives in it can get me!”

“That sounds like you’re afraid of the ocean.” Nanami states. You huff, crossing your arms over your chest just as everyone starts coming back. Nanami laughs softly. “Don’t pout. At least try to have fun, okay?”

You watch as everyone runs to the water, laughing and splashing in the waves. Leaning against the palm tree so you’re in the shade, you can’t help but crack a smile. They’re all so happy, talking among themselves and having a good time. It’s strange. None of them know you, but in a way, you know them. To an extent, at least. 

You really care about them. You want them to be happy. You want this joy to continue for them.

Someone taps your arm. When you look, you realize it’s Komaeda. Weird. Why isn’t he with the others? 

“Daijoubu desu ka?” He asks.

You give him a confused look, and he seems to think for a moment before pointing to you and then to the water. Maybe he’s wondering why you aren’t joining everyone. 

You shake your head, but he seems persistent. Takes a few steps towards the water and gestures for you to come with him. Again, you shake your head. You take out the notepad and flip through it, looking for something you could use to explain. The only thing that really works is… ugh.

You turn the notepad around so he can read it. ‘I am afraid of the ocean.’ He seems disappointed, but nods and walks off towards the water. Sighing, you sit down, flipping through the notebook to try and memorize the phrases you have.

A moment later, Komaeda comes back with a small plastic bucket in tow. You raise an eyebrow as he crouches next to, setting the bucket down. It’s full of sea water. Gently, he takes your arm and dips your hand into the water, then looks at you with a huge, goofy looking grin.

Oh.

Oh no, he’s adorable.

You can’t help but laugh - he thinks it’s the water you’re afraid of. Like you think it’ll burn your skin or something. You shake your head. “ Iie, iie, it’s not that. It’s, uh…” You purse your lips, trying to think of a word to use. “... ookii… kowai. ” It’s the best you can do with what little you know. He nods softly, brow furrowed as he tries to understand, but you don’t have the words. Frustrated, you sigh, turning your gaze back to him. 

He’s thin, but tall, with broad shoulders. He’s got moles in a few spots on his torso, his hair moves in the summer breeze. He’s pale, pale enough to just barely make out the veins under his skin, but he still has color to him. His face is rounded and soft, his pale green eyes glimmering at you as you take in his features. It’s so hard to wrap your head around the fact that this is Komaeda Nagito, certified Tumblr sexyman. He’s here, right in front of you, and he wants you to go swimming with him.

Before anything else can happen, thunder crashes overhead. Your heart drops as you and Komaeda look up, watching as the sky suddenly fills with dark storm clouds. Lightning flashes overhead and the wind picks up, sending a chill through you. You wrap your arms around yourself and stare into the storm.

It’s time.

Usami cries out, trying to figure out what’s going on, and a moment later the monitor on a nearby palm tree buzzes to life. Through the static, a faint silhouette and a nasally, high-pitched cackle come through. 

You don’t know exactly what’s being said, but you don’t need to. Rising from your spot, you cast a glance at Nanami, her worried eyes meeting yours briefly before returning to the screen. With one last cackle, the screen flickers off, and you’re left in the heavy silence with the others as they talk among themselves about what just happened.

Your stomach is in knots as you look at everyone, brow furrowed. You jump when something touches your shoulder, only to realize it’s just Komaeda. He’s still here? Why hasn’t he run off to change into his clothes? He stares at you worriedly, opens his mouth, then closes it again before looking at the crowd. “Nanami-san! Tasukete kudasai!” 

Nanami hurries over and takes your hand gently, smiling and nodding to Komaeda, which he takes as his cue to run off and presumably get changed. You watch him for a moment before looking back at Nanami. “It’s happening.”

“I know.” She nods. “Act like I’m telling you something troubling.”

Right. Your reactions need to make sense. Fuck, you suck at acting. You twist your face into a more exaggerated confusion. She nods. “Good. Is this what happened in the game?”

“Yeah.” You answer. “He asked everyone to gather at Jabberwock Park, right?”

“Yeah. Looks like we have no choice.”

You purse your lips, feeling your heart rate kicking up a bit. Naegi couldn’t stop it from the outside. That means after tonight, it’ll be up to you and Nanami to stop the killing game and get everyone out. 

What’s going to happen to you then?

You shake the thought out of your head, and cling to Nanami’s hand as you and the others who didn’t swim head to Jabberwock Park. You lean close to her and whisper, even though nobody could understand you if they wanted to. “He’s going to announce that there’s a traitor.”

Her brow twitches, but other than that, her face doesn’t shift. “Got it.”

After you get there, it doesn’t take long for the others to join you. You stand by Nanami and feign your confusion while Monokuma goes on and on - sometimes this game really fucking drags its feet. It’s hard to pretend to be confused when he never stops talking.

But he does stop - a bit too soon, you realize, because that’s when he noticed you. Then, like a switch flipped, he tilts his head and laughs. “Welllll, what do we have here?”

In the blink of an eye, he’s mere inches from your face, and you jump so hard you lose your balance and end up falling on your ass. Nanami reaches out to help you, but Monokuma is in her way before she really has a chance to move. You scoot back away a bit, feeling your limbs start to tremble. You feel stupid for being afraid of this stuffed bear, but knowing what he’s capable of makes it hard not to be at least a little intimidated. 

“You definitely don’t belong here. I mean, just look at you!” Monokuma taunts. “Christ, you’re a mess! All your ones and zeros are crammed into such a tiny space! How did you end up here, of all places?”

“I-I- what?” You swallow hard. “What are you talking about?”

“I’m just saying! I know a foreigner when I see one, and buddy, you’ve got that American stank all over ya!” He waves his paw around. “Hey, under those baggy clothes, are you secretly some super sexy, curvy American model with huge boobs? Can I take a peek? I’ve never seen American boobs in person before!” He breaks off into a cackle and you scoot back further, blushing with embarrassment. Even if most of the others here don’t know what he’s saying, there’s no doubt either Sonia or Nanami will give them the gist of it at some point. Tears prick your eyes.

“Aww, widdle baby gonna cry? Come on, don’t be shy! Land of the free, home of the brave, whip out a titty for your country!” He only laughs harder. You bury your face in your hands, too embarrassed to look anyone in the eye. He switches back to Japanese, and you assume he’s talking to the others, but you’ve tuned out.

He tore you down so easily. Literally knocked you on your ass and made you cry within the first five minutes of seeing you. Embarrassed you in front of everyone. How were you going to stop the killing game if you couldn’t even hold your ground against a stuffed bear? You couldn’t communicate easily with most of the people on the Island. You were in a strange place full of people you didn’t know, and you were powerless to stop a murder that would happen in maybe 3 days, if all went according to the game. Your body shakes, your heart racing. The air feels thick and heavy.

A gentle hand touches your shoulder and you jump, eyes snapping up. Komaeda is crouched next to you, in his normal outfit now, his brow furrowed in worry. He gives your shoulder a squeeze. “Ne, daijoubu. Nani o itta no?” You’re pretty sure he’s asking what Monokuma said. Why is he asking you, the one who notoriously cannot translate?

You take in a shaky breath, trying hard to think of the right words. “Komaeda-kun… kuma wa…” Embarrassment settles in your stomach again, and you instinctively cover your chest with your arms, swallowing thickly. “... Kuma wa hentai desu.” You end up muttering, quickly looking away. The bear is a pervert. It gets the point across, you suppose. It’s not the only reason you’re upset, but he didn’t ask why you were upset. He asked what the bear said.

Komaeda stays by your side, rubbing your shoulder until Monokuma vanishes a few minutes later, leaving everyone to talk amongst themselves. A killing game? A traitor working for Monokuma? The voices blend together and their words mean nothing to you, but you get a number of side eyes. You are the most reasonable suspect, to be honest. You can’t say you wouldn’t be suspicious of anyone in your situation, either.

After supposedly talking everyone down from a conflict, much like in the game, Nanami comes over and helps you up. You’re still shaking, but it’s not as bad as it was. Her and Komaeda talk for a moment, but you’re zoned out completely. It’s been a very long, very stressful day.

You aren’t sure when, time blurring together into a blob of colors and sounds, but Nanami ends up walking you back to your cottage. You say goodnight, change into some pajamas - making sure to check the bathroom for any cameras beforehand - then turn out the light, flopping down onto the bed and staring at the ceiling.

Maybe when you close your eyes, the dream will end. You’ll wake up at home, in your own bed, get up and make some breakfast. You’ll be able to actually talk with the people around you if you want to. You can read fanfic and play video games and not be stuck here.

You drift off to sleep and dream of going home.

Chapter Text

You wake up the next morning and are instantly disappointed. Which isn’t abnormal, but on this particular morning you have a whole new set of reasons for it.

The morning announcement blares overhead in Japanese. Monokuma’s Japanese voice is somehow more annoying than his English one. It sounds like he’s eating sunflower seeds while he talks. Credit where it’s due, the VA did a fantastic job of making this bear the absolute fucking worst.

You stare at the ceiling for a bit after the monitor blips off, letting your brain catch up. Right. You got isekai’d. You didn’t even get fun isekai’d, you got sucked into a world where nobody understands you and everyone’s gonna die. That is, unless you can somehow think of a way to stop that from happening, but right now you’re not feeling too confident in your ability.

“Aww, why the long face, Amerikajin?” Monokuma’s shrill laughter startles you into a sitting position. He’s in the middle of the room, laying on his side with his round little paw resting on his ‘hip’. You groan. “Go away, asswipe.”

“Tsk, tsk, language! That is no way to talk to your teacher, y’know!” He rolls his round little body onto his feet. “Huhuhu, I know Americans are known for being bold, but you’re a real pottymouth.”

“Get out.” You chuck your pillow at him. You miss. “I don’t want you here. You look dumb and smell like a car air freshener that nobody’s replaced since 2001.”

“So mean! You’re gonna hurt my feelings that way, kid!” He puts on a fake sad voice as you slide out from under the covers, marching across the room to grab your clothes from the closet. When you flick on the light, he’s on a top shelf overhead, laying on his stomach and kicking his feet like a schoolgirl. “Say, I just wanted to pop in and have a chat with you before you went out to start your day! Doesn’t that sound fun? Some one-on-one fun with your pal?”

You ignore him, grabbing some clothes and flicking the closet light back off, heading for the bathroom and closing the door behind you, locking it. You sigh softly in relief, but when you turn around, he’s sitting in your bathroom sink, cross-legged. “It’s rude to ignore people when they’re talking to you, y’know.”

“What the fuck do you want?” You groan, leaning against the door, hand resting on the knob in case you need to run. He tilts his head like a curious dog. “Well, what do you think I want?”

“I dunno, to cause despair? Isn’t that like, your whole thing? Your one gimmick?”

“Hey, I have lots of gimmicks!” Angrily, he waves his paws around, baring his sharp teeth. “I put a ton of effort into them! Don’t sell me short!”

You roll your eyes. “Fine, whatever.”

Calming back down surprisingly quickly, he clears his throat. “Actually, I came here to propose a deal.”

“... yeah. Like you have anything I want.” You shake your head. “Whatever it is, I’m not interested. Can I change now?”

“Wait, wait, wait! You haven’t even heard me out yet!” He huffs, scooting to the edge of the sink and swinging his legs off. His tone shifts suddenly, going from absurdly upbeat to low and sinister in a heartbeat. “You realize you’re not supposed to be here, right?”

You swallow thickly. “... Of course.” Where is he going with this?

“So, you must have wondered what happens when all this is over?” He gestures around vaguely, his voice echoing off the tile walls of the bathroom. “What happens to you when the simulation ends? Do you go home? Or does your memory die here, with me?”

You keep your face still, but you can’t stop the way your heartbeat quickens. He leans forward, lowering his voice even further. “What if I told you I had a solution?”

“Get out.” Your voice is stern. He bursts into laughter and the sound bounces off the walls, into your ears, spreading through your brain like an infection. Hands shaking, you raise your bundle of clothes over your head. “Get out!” You shout, bring them down onto the empty counter. He’s vanished, blinked out of existence in an instant, but his laughter echoes within your brain.

You get changed quickly, splashing your face with cold water before stepping out of the bathroom. You have to think. There has to be something you can do within the next few days to stop the first murder. Maybe you can intercept Komaeda’s letter for not-Togami? Or you can lure Komaeda out of the old building while he’s cleaning and take the knife out from under the table?

Double-checking that you have the notepad with the keychain attached, you head out your door still lost in thought. It’s a bright, sunny morning, and overhead you hear a gull cry. You’ve never seen a gull up close before. Does it count if it’s a simulation?

You’re startled out of your thoughts when a deep, booming voice calls out. “Amerikajin-san! Ohayou!”

Tanaka’s boots clunk towards you down the boardwalk. He wears so many layers… how is he not dying of a heatstroke? You place a hand on your chest, taking a deep breath to calm yourself. “Ah, Tanaka-kun. Ohayou.”

He says something, probably in his typical overdramatic way, but unfortunately that means you can’t understand a word coming out of his mouth. He stares at you expectantly, and you stare back in confusion. What is he expecting? Does he want you to read his mind or something?

He says something else, waving a hand, and you pull out the notepad, flipping through it until you find the page for ‘I do not understand’ and flip it around for him to read. He hums as he looks between you and the notepad briefly, before holding out his hand. You give him the notepad and he spends a moment looking through it, before he seems to find something he can use. He turns it around to show it to you.

‘Follow me, please.’

Taking the notepad back, you nod, following behind him as he leads you towards the Hotel Mirai. At first, you think he must be taking you to the restaurant for the meeting not-Togami calls this morning, but instead he takes you around the building. If you didn’t know Tanaka was a huge softie, there was no way in Hell you would follow him behind a building alone, but he has cool hair so you do it anyway.

He stops by some bushes and crouches down, brushing leaves out of the way and extending his hand, clicking his tongue softly. You tilt your head, wondering what on Earth he could be doing, but then out of the bushes…

“A kitty!” You gasp. It looks old and gray, its round little face poking out from the bushes and sniffing Tanaka’s hand. He gestures for you to come closer and you move slowly, despite your excitement. You love cats, and you definitely weren’t expecting this at all. There aren’t any cats in the game, unless you count Nanami’s hoodie. 

You reach out and the cat shoves its head into the palm of your hand, practically begging for pets. You’re grinning from ear to ear, giggling softly. “Aww, what a pretty kitty! Who’s a good boy? Who’s-” You pause. Is it a boy? It doesn’t really matter, but you look at Tanaka, who’s been watching you pet the cat, most of his face hidden behind his scarf. You point to it. “Shounen? Shoujo?”

“Shounen.” He nods. You smile and go back to petting the cat as he rubs against your leg. “What a pretty boy! You’re such a sweetie!” You’re getting cat fur all over your clothes, but you don’t care. Your mood just skyrocketed and you aren’t about to let it drop yet. You look at Tanaka again. “Arigato, Tanaka-kun!” 

He smirks, seeming amused. “Neko wa suki desu ka?” You take a minute to translate it in your head. ‘Ka’ means it’s a question, ‘suki’ probably means ‘like’ in this context… he’s asking if you like cats. You nod excitedly. “Hai. Neko wa kawaii.” The cat climbs up on your legs, and you wrap your arms around it, smushing your face into its fur and giggling.

You’re sure you must look stupid, but you don’t care. You spent yesterday having panic attacks and getting sexually harassed by a stuffed animal. You can have a little stupidity, as a treat.

Tanaka taps your shoulder, and when you look up at him, he points to the pocket you keep the notepad in. Nodding, you hand it over, and he flips through it a moment before turning it back around. ‘How do you say ____?’ There’s a blank space on the notepad, but he points to the cat in your arms and says “Neko.”

“Kitty.” You lift the cat slightly, patting its head. “Kiti?” He repeats. You nod, still smiling. His scarf covers his mouth, but you swear you can hear the smile in his voice when he says “Utsukushi kiti.” You giggle. It is a beautiful cat.

You walk with Tanaka back around the building, carrying the cat in your arms. He’s surprisingly chill, not struggling at all, but he does seem old and tired. You hold him close as the two of you walk into the restaurant. Almost everyone else is already there.

“Aaaaah! Nekooo!” Mioda bounces up to you excitedly, cooing at the cat in your arms. Feeling him stiffen, you pull back slightly. You don’t want him getting stressed and scratching someone. You don’t stop her from petting him, though. Once he’s sniffed her, you feel him relax, and you relax in turn.

Mioda is speaking so quickly that even if you were fluent, you’re sure you would struggle to understand her, so you just smile and let her go on. When she pauses for breath, you nod in Tanaka’s direction in an attempt to give him credit. “Tanaka-kun kakkoii desu. Tanaka-kun to neko wa kakkoii desu.”

Tanaka recedes further into his scarf, but you notice the tips of his ears turning red. You giggle as Mioda bombards him with questions you don’t understand.

“Aww, what a cute kitty…” Nanami comes up beside you, holding out a hand to let the cat sniff her. “Where’d you find it?”

“Behind the building. Tanaka-kun found it. Look at him, he’s so sweet, I… ah… ah-CHOO!” You sneeze hard into your elbow, pulling back with a sniffle. “Ugh, excuse me.”

Nanami eyes you closely for a moment, then tilts her head. “Are you allergic to cats?”

Fuck.

“W-what makes you say that?” You look away, already knowing damn well you’ve been caught. She furrows her brow. “Your eyes are red, and that was a really powerful sneeze. You should avoid allergens, you don’t want to get sick.” 

“B-but… but look at him! He likes me!” You pet his head, pouting. “I can handle some sniffling and some itchy eyes for him! I’ll live!”

Appearing to have made up her mind, Nanami says something to Tanaka, supposedly explaining your allergy and that he should take the cat away. Reluctantly, you let Tanaka take him from your arms. You pout, sniffling. “Kanashii desu.”

“We should get some of the cat fur off you. Come on.” Taking your hand, Nanami pulls you away from the others, around the corner into the bathroom so you could wash your hands and face while she manifests a lint roller from her tiny backpack and starts going at your clothes. Your eyes are watery and itchy.

“Before you and Tanaka-kun got there, Togami-kun said he wanted to hold a party tonight.”

Your heart stops. The sink is still running, gray cat fur swirling down the drain. Already? You swallow hard. “Did he say where?”

“The old building, but it needs to be cleaned up. We were going to draw chopsticks to see who’s going to end up doing it.” She finishes getting the cat hair off you, returning the lint roller to her backpack. 

“We can’t. We can’t draw chopsticks, Nanami.” You turn around, an uneasy feeling settled in your stomach. “If we do, someone will die tonight at the party.”

“... I see.” She presses her lips together, thinking hard. “Maybe there’s a way we can talk everyone out of the party… they all seemed excited though…”

Suddenly, it hits you. You don’t need to distract Komaeda or intercept his message. You don’t need to do anything drastic at all. You just need to do little things. Small, reasonable actions that wouldn’t happen if you weren’t there.

“Nanami-san, I’ll clean the old building.”

“Huh?” She tilts her head. “But you said…”

“I said someone will die if we draw chopsticks.” You point out. “But if I volunteer, there’s no need to rely on random chance. Just tell everyone I’m trying to build their trust, that you explained what happened yesterday and that I felt like everyone was suspicious of me. Talk them into it.”

She takes a long moment to think, eyes wandering around the bathroom slowly. You hold your breath. It’s so simple. Komaeda can’t hide the knife while cleaning if he never cleans in the first place.

“... Alright. I’ll do it.” She nods. “You’re sure this will work?”

“As sure as I can be.” 

When the two of you leave the bathroom, Komaeda is holding a bundle of chopsticks. You don’t understand the following conversation, but Nanami gestures to you and you try to put on a shy expression. They have to buy it. They have to.

After a bit more talking, Nanami turns to you with a smile. “Hanamura-kun asks that you start with the kitchen, so he can start cooking as soon as possible.”

A wave of relief washing over you, you smile back. “I’ll be sure to make it spotless.”

“You won’t be alone. Komaeda-kun offered to help.” Nanami adds. “Everyone agreed that nobody should be alone in a building with Hanamura-kun. He’s…”

“... a creep.” You nod, smile never faltering despite the knot forming in your stomach. You look up at Komaeda. “Arigato, Komaeda-kun.” He nods, smiling back.

That clever bastard.

Chapter Text

The old building was disgusting when you first got there. Mice, dust bunnies, cobwebs everywhere. It was a nightmare. Sighing heavily and tying a bandana around the lower half of your face to avoid breathing in dust, you and Komaeda got to work.

Komaeda was smart for offering to help - and you won’t lie, you were glad you wouldn’t be alone in the building with Hanamura. You’ve yet to encounter him one-on-one and you’d like it to stay that way.

Luckily, cleaning doesn’t require much communication. You can hold a broom and point to a corner, and Komaeda will know what you’re saying immediately. The kitchen was easy to clean, and between the two of you, it was done in a little over an hour and a half. Hanamura seemed delighted at how clean all the equipment was, making sure to thank both of you before you moved on to the dining hall. The floor was creaky and uneven, the tables all pushed against the wall.

After you and Komaeda swept, he went to drag the tables away from the wall, gesturing for you to come help, but you stopped, peering down at the floor. The gaps between the boards were really wide. It would be easy for someone to roll their ankle like this. Tanaka’s Hell Hound earring would fall through these floorboards later tonight. 

“Matte, kudasai.” You call out to Komaeda, pulling out the notepad and flipping through it. He comes over to you and you flip the notepad around. ‘Follow me, please.’

He eyes you suspiciously, but follows you down the hall to the storage closet, where you’re pleased to find a rolled up carpet. Smiling, you point to it. “Kapetto.” When you look back at him, he just seems confused. Shit. You can’t blame him for not understanding, but it’s still frustrating. You don’t have a note for ‘we need to cover the holes in the floor or someone will break their ankle’ so instead you crouch down and stick your hand through the gap in the floorboards. You can almost fit the whole thing through. You point to the carpet again and he finally seems to understand, nodding and helping you drag it back to the dining hall.

The silence between the two of you doesn’t feel awkward, but you still feel on edge. You need to keep a close eye on him to make sure he never gets a chance to hide that knife. You won’t be able to rest until 11:30 PM comes and goes without anything happening. You just hope you can successfully ruin all of Komaeda’s plans.

“Ne,” He calls out, waving a hand in front of your eyes. “Daijoubu?”

You feel like he asks if you’re okay a lot. You force a smile and nod, but he narrows his eyes, clearly not believing you. You go back to wiping down the table you were working on before dragging a tablecloth over it. It was well into the afternoon now, and you and Komaeda had gotten a lot done. The smell of food was wafting in from the kitchen, and the room felt much more inviting. 

You smoothed out the tablecloth and gave it a satisfied pat. With the two of you together, it was a piece of cake. In the game, you’re pretty sure it took Komaeda all day to get it done by himself, but it looks like you’ll be left with some free time. You’ll have to make sure Komaeda doesn’t come back afterwards, but with Hanamura in the kitchen it would be hard for him to grab the knife without being noticed and stopped.

“Nya… nyaa…”

What.

You turn your head. Behind a table across the room, Komaeda has crouched down and is holding Kiki, the gray cat from earlier, up just high enough so his face and paws show over the table, like he’s sitting there by himself. Komaeda waves Kiti’s paw around. “Konbanwa, Amerikajin! Kiti wa suki desu yo!” He’s putting on a high pitched voice while he moves the cat around like a puppet.

You clap your hand over your mouth to avoid laughing too hard. Is he really trying to cheer you up by using the cat as a puppet? That’s adorable. You walk over and peek around the table at him. He laughs awkwardly, looking away in what you assume is embarrassment, but you just giggle. “Kawaii, Komaeda-kun.” His cheeks turn pink as he lowers the cat. 

Without warning, Kiti throws out a paw and scratches at Komaeda, causing him to drop the cat. It runs off before you have a chance to scold it, but you aren’t focused on that right now. You drop next to him. “Daijoubu ka?” He’s holding his hand tight, hissing through his teeth, but then he laughs and shakes his head. He says something you don’t understand, looking down at the thin cut on his hand. It’s bleeding. Not much, but still. 

Taking him by the arm, you tug him to his feet and out of the dining hall. He’s talking, probably protesting, saying it’s nothing, but even if you understood him you’d probably ignore him. You pull him into the small bathroom in the hallway, turning on the sink. He pulls his arm from your grip, brow furrowed, and he keeps talking. He knows you don’t have a single clue what he could possibly be saying, right? 

Sighing softly, you stick your hand under the water, feeling the temperature. It’s warm, but not too warm. You then grab his hand with your wet one, and gently place it in the water pooling in the bottom of the sink, like he did with the bucket at the beach. You don’t know what else to do. You just want to rinse off his hand so the scratch doesn’t get infected - Kiti is a stray after all.

I just want to help you.

He finally relents, and you rinse out the wound as carefully as possible. His fingers twitch when the water hits it directly, so instead you gently splash at it before wrapping his hand in a towel. You turn off the water and look up at him. “Itai ka?”

“Iie. Arigato.” His response is quiet. He isn’t looking at you. Is he upset?

“Ah, there you are!” Sonia’s voice chimes from the hallway. “Is everything alright?”

Komaeda quickly steps out of the bathroom and you follow, shutting the door behind you. “Yeah, Komaeda-kun got a scratch on his hand so I helped him rinse it out.”

Sonia spends a moment talking to Komaeda before he waves to you and walks off. Sonia smiles. “Would you like to go to the dining hall with me to help set up the food? Hanamura-kun wanted Komaeda-kun’s help carrying trays, so we should do our best to ensure the presentation is lovely!”

Laughing, you agree, and follow her into the dining hall.

For the remainder of the afternoon and into the evening, things go about how you would expect. Not-Togami pats everyone down, including you, and everyone shows up except for Kuzuryu. Spotting you hovering around, unsure of what to do, Owari raises a hand into the air and beckons you over. “Ne, Amerikajin-kun! Koko!”

You head over. She’s about as tall as you, maybe an inch taller. Her brown hair is curly and wild, freckles spotting across her face and arms. She grins at you with crooked, slightly yellowed teeth, and offers you a piece of meat. You accept, thank her, and take a bite. You don’t know what animal it came from, but it’s probably the best tasting thing you’ve ever had. Seeing your face light up, Owari laughs. “Oishii, ne?” 

People are talking, and from across the room, Nanami smiles at you. Taking a look in the back corner, you’re happy to realize there’s no lamp there.

You did it.

You can’t stop the smile on your face, and you honestly don’t want to. You aren’t sure how the Hell you did it, what exactly you did that stopped Komaeda from putting his plan into action, but you did and that’s what matters.

Komaeda is still leaning on the far wall, and without thinking, you go stand next to him. Mahiru’s camera flashes and you’re pretty sure you blinked. You glance at the table where the lamp would have been, noticing an array of desserts, most notably what appears to be a chocolate cake. Nice. You look over at Komaeda and point at it. “Keeki?” 

He shakes his head and you shrug, pushing off the wall to grab a slice.

The A/C unit beeps, and you are plunged into darkness. 

Confused and startled, you trip over your own two feet, falling flat on the floor and knocking the wind out of you. You croak and gasp for air as the pain from the impact radiates through your body. People shout in the darkness, but you can’t catch a word of it. You can feel the splintery wood of the floor under your palms as you slowly roll onto your back. It hurts like a bitch. How hard did you fall?

A minute later, the lights turn back on, blinding you. You blink once, twice, three times, but your eyes won’t focus. You still haven’t caught your breath, you realize. Are you having another panic attack?

The others sound more calm now. Placing your palms flat on the floor, you try to push yourself up into a sitting position, but cry out in pain. You’re vaguely aware of people turning to look at you, shocked gasps barely register in your brain. Something is in your way, you realize, and look down at your stomach. There’s something stuck through your shirt - no, wait. Not your shirt. There’s something stuck in your chest.

What?

Suddenly you’re surrounded. Komaeda is the first one there, since he was closest, and his hands hover awkwardly over your body. Something long and thin is lodged just below your ribs, on your right side. He says something. You don’t know what he’s saying.

Nanami is there too, grabbing your hand. “What happened?” She asks. Confused, you shake your head, still not able to grasp it yourself. “I-I… I was gonna get some cake, and… the lights…” You swallow hard. “I think I fell.”

You’re not sure when Tsumiki gets there, but she puts her hands around the wound and presses. Hissing, acting on instinct, you start trying to push her off, but Nanami grabs your arms and pins them down. She shouts something, and Owari grabs your legs just as you’re about to start kicking. You squirm in their grip, whining and groaning. It burns like she’s dumping acid on your skin, warmth blooming from the wound and radiating out to all your limbs. You let out a sob. “I-it hurts-”

“I know, I know.” Nanami mumbles soothingly. People are still shouting, still talking over one another, but shrill laughter cuts through the air like a knife.

Your vision blurs, but you can just make out Monokuma’s shape, standing on a table and cackling. He’s speaking Japanese, and maybe if you tried you could make it out, but it feels like your brain is running in slow motion. There’s some back and forth between him and the others, several worried, frightened glances in your direction. You fight the urge to cough.

“W-what’s happening?” You mutter after a moment, looking cross-eyed up at Nanami. She swallows hard. “... he’s saying that he won’t help you because this is an attempted murder, and if you die, there will be a class trial.”

Huh?

Huh?

Huhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuh?

“S-someone- tried to-” You cough and it hurts, you cringe and sob. Tears start falling as you look around the room, unsure what to think, what to feel. Your brain is moving entirely too fast and entirely too slow.

“W-what-” You break off into another sob. “... what did I do wrong?”

Nanami’s eyes widen. “No, no, you didn’t-”

“I messed up!” You whimper, fingers weakly clinging to her jacket. “I tried to help, but I still messed up, Nanami! I’m so sorry! I-I-” You swallow, struggling to find words. “Please tell them I’m sorry. Please.”

“There’s nothing for you to be sorry for!” She squeezes your arm. You just shake your head. The room spins, and Tsumiki says something you can’t make out. Nanami nods and releases your arms, but Pekoyama is there a moment later, pinning them to the floor above your head. Nanami cups your face in her hands, leaning over you. “Hey, look at me.”

You struggle to focus your eyes on her through the tears. Her gentle smile never wavers. “This is going to hurt. A lot. But we need to get that out of you, okay? You can scream, cry, and curse as much as you want. But we can’t let you thrash around.”

You blink up at her, sniffling. “I-I… Is it bad?”

Nanami looks up, says something to Komaeda on your other side, then looks back at you. “Look at me. Don’t look away.” Both her and Komaeda press down on your shoulders, keeping your torso in place.

Your flesh rips, and a brand new, searing white hot pain tears through your body. You hear screaming, and it actually takes you a minute to realize it’s coming from you. Your limbs thrash around, but with Owari holding your legs and Hinata pinning your arms and torso with all his body weight, you can’t move. You shriek and sob, trying to squirm away. “Stop! It hurts! Stop it! Nanami, stop!”

She shakes her head. “I’m sorry. It’ll be over in a minute.”

It feels like you’re being cut open, your shirt soaked with your own crimson blood. “Please, please stop! S- y- yamete! Yamete, kudasai!”

Your head is swimming. You can’t move, your brain is completely overloaded from the pain. You writhe and cry. “I’m sorry! I’m so sorry! Gomenasai! Gomen! Please stop! Please!”

Nanami holds your head tightly in her hands, glancing between your face and the people around. Is everyone here? The room feels like it’s getting further and further away. Nanami’s voice echoes, and though she’s speaking English, you can’t make out her words.

“We’re done! We’re done.” Nanami shushes you while you sob, finally falling limp under their hold. It still hurts, but Tsumiki is no longer touching you, doing whatever it was she was doing. Nanami looks up and says something to her, but you can’t make it out. Your limbs are released and you curl into Nanami’s lap. She brushes your hair from your face as you tremble, squeezing your eyes shut.

A moment later, she lifts your face by the chin and you open your eyes to look at her. “We’re going to take you back to your cottage, alright? You need to rest there and heal.”

After taking a moment to process what she said, you nod softly. She looks at Pekoyama and nods, and in response Pekoyama slides one arm under your knees and the other under your arms, lifting you up into a bridal-style carry. You cling weakly to her shoulders as she stands, but she never struggles under your weight. Damn. She’s strong. 

You’re vaguely aware of people passing by, but your eyelids flutter and you’re too focused on keeping them open to notice. Pekoyama stares ahead as she carries you, glancing down only once as you leave the dining hall and walk out into the night air.

“Itai ka?” She says. The gears in your head creak and struggle to translate. She’s asking if you’re in pain, you think. You nod your head, and she hums. “Gomen.” 

The last thing you hear before drifting into unconsciousness is her apology.

Chapter Text

At first, you’re only aware of a few vague sensations. A warmth, a pressure on your hand, a faint sound. None of it is coherent, and you aren’t yet truly conscious, but it’s enough to kickstart your brain. Immediately, you try to recall what’s happening, but you can’t get a grasp on anything substantial. Just thin threads of recollection that slip through your fingers. You remember food, and fun, and laughter. Cackling, howling, ear-piercing laughter.

The memory brings your surroundings more into focus. You hear voices, but it doesn’t make sense to you. It’s a vague, barely-there idea of someone talking, and you’re not sure if they’re speaking to you or to someone else. You feel like there’s two voices, but you can’t distinguish them from one another. They melt together in your brain until all you hear is a low, monotone noise.

You feel strange. Again, you reach for those threads of memory and tug, and finally something crumbles down. The party. That’s right, you were at the party. Everyone was having fun, eating and laughing and spending time together.

You tug again. There was no lamp. You asked Komaeda if he wanted cake, and he declined. Then the power went out and you tripped. You were hurt. You were hurt badly, but you were also in shock. You didn’t realize how badly you were hurt yet.

Nanami’s face. Her soft hands cupping your cheeks, keeping you focused on her. Her voice, quiet and calm, talking you through the pain.

Her voice.

This time, something tugs you. The noise clears up until you can make out Nanami’s voice. You want to cry out. You feel like you’re still on the floor in the dining hall, and you can’t get up, and nobody is around to help. You want to call for her, but your mouth won’t move.

You focus on your left hand. There’s something there, you can feel it. A soft pressure, gentle. You curl your fingers around it and squeeze. The talking stops. No, you didn’t want that. You wanted her to know you were there, you didn’t want her to go away.

The talking starts again, a bit more distant, and then suddenly you can hear her clear as day. “Can you hear me? Squeeze my hand again if you can hear me.”

You focus, curling your fingers and squeezing again. It’s her hand. She’s holding your hand. She’s here. You’re here. You’re safe.

“That’s good,” You can hear the smile in her voice. “Stay with me, okay? Hinata is going to get Tsumiki-chan, they’ll be here soon.”

Tsumiki? What’s…?

You fight to open your eyes, but your eyelids flutter and never open. You catch fleeting, blurry glimpses of Nanami’s pink hair. A frustrated groan rises from your throat. 

“Just rest, alright? You were hurt really badly.” Her thumb brushes over the back of your hand. “You’ve been out for a few hours. It’s 5 AM now.”

Your lips part, and finally, you manage out a word. “... what..?”

“Do you remember what happened?” Nanami asks, the world finally beginning to make more sense. You’re laying down somewhere soft, somewhere comfortable. There’s a blanket pulled over you, and a sharp, aching pain in your right side, just below your ribs. You feel your face twist in discomfort. “I… I hurt…” You mumble.

She squeezes your hand. “I know. Tsumiki-chan will bring painkillers.” There’s a slight pause. “Monomi managed to get the second Island open. There’s a pharmacy there.”

You hum softly in acknowledgement. A door creaks and your head turns, but you still can’t pry your eyes open. Tsumiki brings painkillers, but they’re pills, so Nanami helps you sit up long enough to take them. Moving your torso at all hurts so bad you can feel the tears streaming down your cheeks before you can stop them. You’re nearly limp in her arms, your body not responding to your demands to move, to get up and figure out what the Hell happened.

The moment your head hits the pillow, you’re out again. It’s so quick and easy to slip back away, you barely notice it, and that scares you. Your heart pounds against your ribcage, a distant unease and discomfort plaguing you. You see flashes of something, a mess of colors behind your eyelids that swirls to the sound of chattering voices. You’re not sure how long it takes, but eventually, your eyes drift open.

You’re in your cottage. Laying on your back in bed, with the covers pulled over you. Sunlight shines in the windows. Looking around, you realize you’re alone.

Shoving the blanket off your body, you look down and realize you’ve been stripped of your bloodstained clothes. You’re now in a pajama shirt and a random pair of shorts. The shirt is on backwards. You’re grateful you aren’t in crusty-ass bloodstained clothes, but you cringe at the thought of someone having to change you while you were unconscious. At least you’re wearing the same underwear.

Propping yourself up on your elbow, you take a deep breath and brace yourself before pulling your shirt up. Three stitches poke out of your skin, just below your ribs. The flesh around the area is bruised and nasty looking. You lower your shirt, deciding not to look at it again.

Slowly and carefully, you sit the rest of the way up. The wound stings, but not so bad you’re unable to lower your feet to the floor and shakily stand. You shuffle over to your closet and look around for a moment before grabbing your favorite sweater and a pair of camo sweatpants. You like this pair because it has a second set of pockets halfway down your thighs. You never use those pockets, but it makes you feel extra prepared.

Plus, they’re super warm and comfy, and you feel ridiculously cold for being on a tropical island.

Shuffling into the bathroom, you sit on the toilet to get changed, tossing the clothes you were previously wearing into your hamper. You also take this chance to actually use the bathroom, drying your hands on your pants as you shuffle back out into the main room. You crouch slowly, dragging your shoes onto your feet before hobbling out the door.

It must be early, based on how low the sun still is. Unsure of what to do with yourself, you make your way towards the hotel, taking your time. You have no idea how bad the injury is, but you do know that you’re in pain and the longer you move, the worse it gets.

You make it to the hotel lobby and sit down to take a breather. It’s not that far of a walk, but you felt so weak and shaky it might as well have been a mile. Sighing softly, you wait for the ache to subside.

“Gooood morning, early bird!” A familiar voice shouts. You stiffen. Oh god, not now.

But Monokuma doesn’t care what you want. He plops his round little body down next to you, snickering into his paws. “Boy, you sure are a sleepyhead! Nobody could get you to wake up at all last night!”

“Really?” You ask flatly. “I can’t imagine why.”

“Sarcasm isn’t very cute, y’know.” He huffs. “But who can blame you after everything? All that work you put in, all the time you spent trying to keep everyone safe and prevent a murder, just for you to completely fail and end up with a stab wound!”

You stare ahead, wondering if you could crawl up the stairs in your current state. It wasn’t very likely, but it definitely wasn’t impossible, either. You were willing to do just about anything to get yourself away from this stupid fucking bear, at this point.

“Y’know, you got really lucky last night! If you die, you’ll be stuck here with me for who knows how long!”

“... What the hell are you talking about?” You cast a glare at him from the corner of your eye. 

“Ope, got your attention now, do I?” His shrill voice is giving you a headache. “Well, ya see, looking at you from the back end of the program, you’re all sorts of fucked up and backwards! You’re barely on the same functioning level as the other sad sacks. However, there is one thing you have that they don’t; your avatar has a backed up version lurking around here somewhere, and in the event of your death, that backup version will be loaded in!”

“Wait, what?” You narrow your eyes at him. “You’re fucking with me, right? Why the hell would I have a failsafe, but nobody else?”

“Beats me, bucko!” He laughs, tossing his paws into the air. “But I can tell you that the place you’re assigned to spawn back in doesn’t exist yet! So when the program tries to load you in, you’ll be stuck in the void, with nobody but little old me to talk to!”

Before you can even think of how to react, he’s an inch away from your face, his red eye glowing menacingly. You lean away, but he follows you, his voice low. “And if that happens, I’m sure you’ll be willing to do just about anything to be with your friends again, right?”

“Get the fuck away from me.” You hiss through gritted teeth. Pulling back and howling with laughter, Monokuma hops off the couch and starts to waddle off. You breathe a sigh of relief, but then he stops, glancing over his shoulder at you.

“By the way,” He says, “You should check up on everyone this morning. They had a real rough time last night.” before he blips out of existence before your very eyes.

You don’t get a moment to process this encounter, because the hotel lobby door swings open. Whirling your head around, you realize it’s Sonia, with Tsumiki in tow. Before you can open your mouth, Sonia has run over and nearly tackled you in a hug, squeezing you tight in her arms. “Oh, I am so glad to see that you have awoken! How on Earth did you get here?!” She asks, pulling back to look you in the face.

You groan, the sudden movement irritating your injury. “I… walked? How else?”

Tsumiki’s shaky voice reaches your ears as she comes over to the couch where you and Sonia are. Sonia’s face quickly gets stern. “You should not have gotten out of bed! Please allow Tsumiki-san to observe your injury!”

“Yeah, yeah…” You mutter, laying back on the couch and letting Tsumiki pull your shirt up. Sonia’s face visibly pales at the sight of the stitches, and she pointedly looks away. Soft, gentle hands apply pressure around your abdomen, and Tsumiki’s droopy purple eyes meet yours. “Itai ka?”

You nod, biting your tongue. She’s barely touching you, but it hurts like she’s slapping it as hard as she can. Nodding softly to herself, she tugs your shirt back down again and clasps her hands over her chest, looking at Sonia and telling her something that makes her look at you sternly again. “We are taking you back to your cottage, where you will rest and recover.” She reaches out to pull you up, but you scoot away, out of her reach. “Wait, hold on! I still don’t know what happened! What time is it?! Where is everyone?!”

Just as you say that, the monitor overhead buzzes to life, and what you assume is the morning announcement plays. When it ends and you look back at Sonia, she’s teary-eyed, and her face is solemn. Tsumiki’s hands are trembling harder than usual. The quiet that follows is heavy.

“Last night,” Sonia is the one who breaks it, her voice soft and shaky. “After you fell unconscious and were carried back to your cottage, we discovered the body of Togami Byakuya-kun underneath one of the tables.”

Your heart hits the floor. “... what? ” It comes out a whisper.

“A trial was held soon after, and in that time, we discovered that his killer was Hanamura Teruteru - during his attack on Togami-kun, you fell too close, and because he could not see in the darkness, you ended up being injured as well.”

Shifting slightly, straightening her shoulders, and clearing her throat, she looks you in the eye once again. “Hanamura Teruteru was executed by Monokuma after he was found guilty. He died around 3 AM last night.”

You feel nauseous. The room spins, and for a second you think you’re going to pass out again. Tears sting your eyes and your breathing shakes. 

You had failed.

Chapter Text

The weight of your 3DS is familiar in your hands. You’re glad all your games are in English, but you’re playing Luigi’s Mansion, and you could probably play through it without reading anything if you really had to.

The music and the sounds remind you of being a kid again, back when you first got this thing. Luigi’s Mansion was one of your first games that you didn’t have to share with your siblings. You used to spend hours in the Scarescraper, the online gauntlet of trails, catching ghosts with other players from who knows where. You remember sitting at the kitchen table in your childhood home, beating the first boss for the first time, and telling your dad about it as you ate your lunch with him.

You miss home.

The blanket is yanked off your head and you jump, pouting at Nanami as she stands over you. She frowns. “How long have you been laying here?”

“How long ago was 7 AM?” You mutter, returning your eyes to your game. Sighing softly, Nanami sits on the edge of your bed. “I’m assuming you heard?”

Suddenly, your mouth is dry. “Yeah. Sonia told me this morning.”

Swallowing thickly, Nanami takes a small bottle and some cotton swabs out of her backpack. “We need to clean the area around your wound. Would you roll on your back for me?”

You oblige, pausing your game before rolling over and lifting up your shirt. Unlike Sonia, Nanami doesn’t visibly cringe and look away when she sees it. Instead, she calmly applies hydrogen peroxide to a cotton swab and dabs around the area, careful not to apply too much pressure. It stings, but it’s not the worst thing you’ve ever felt. 

“Is it bad?” You ask, watching her put the supplies away as you tug your shirt down. She hums softly. “Tsumiki-chan says that you don’t have any internal bleeding, and it doesn’t seem like any of your organs were hit. As long as it doesn’t get infected, you should be feeling better in a little over a week. Maybe sooner - she did say that you shouldn’t have been able to walk at all without collapsing from the pain, but then you were found in the hotel lobby.”

“Yeah. That… wasn’t smart of me. It sucked ass.” You tug the blanket up further on your body. “Monokuma was there.”

Her eyes snap up to you. “Are you alright? What’d he say?”

“Not much. Just taunted me, mostly. But…” You bite your lip, contemplating on whether or not you should tell Nanami. You have no clue if Monokuma’s just messing with you, filling your head with lies to upset you even more than you already are. If he is, then wouldn’t admitting it worried you be letting him win..?

“But what?” Nanami’s head tilts and you sigh softly, rolling back over onto your side and unpausing your game. “Nevermind. He was just messing with me. Don’t worry about it.”

Hesitantly, she lets it go, leaning over to look at your screen. “What are you playing?”

“Luigi’s Mansion. It’s the sequel, actually. I’ve had it since I was a kid.” You mumble, eyes glued to the screen. She hums in acknowledgement. “Is it fun?”

“Yeah, I like it.” You shrug. The two of you fall silent again, the only sound in the room coming from your game as you check various boxes and cabinets for money.

“How are you feeling?” Nanami asks, resting a gentle hand on your shoulder.

“I have a stab wound.” You deadpan in response. You can almost hear her roll her eyes as she chuckles. “No, I mean, how are you feeling? About… Togami-kun and Hanamura-kun.”

You pause your game again, staring off into space. You recall Sonia’s sorrowful expression, the trembling in Tsumiki’s arms as she helped you back to your cottage. You didn’t really get the chance to talk with Hanamura or not-Togami, directly or with help, and now that chance wouldn’t come. You had failed to stop the murder from happening. You had failed to save everyone.

“I’m tired.” You mumble, turning off your 3DS and pulling the blanket higher around you. “I’m gonna take a nap.”

“... Alright. I’ll be by later with some food so you can eat dinner.”

You give her a thumbs up, listening to her footsteps as she crosses the room, pauses briefly, then quickly heads out the door, shutting it behind her.

Tugging the blanket over your head, surrounded by its weight and warmth, you finally allow yourself to break. You curl up into a ball, wrapping your arms tightly around yourself as your body racks with the force of your sobs. Two people are dead. Two people died because you weren’t fast enough, you weren’t smart enough to stop it. Maybe if you had talked to Hanamura before the party. Maybe if you had managed to intercept the note before Togami read it. Maybe if you had kept a closer eye on Komaeda while you were cleaning.

Komaeda.

You completely forgot. If the first trial happened while you were out, that means Komaeda had his breakdown already. And if Komaeda went on his crazy-ass rant, then Soda and Nidai have probably already tied him up and hidden him in the old building. He’s probably been there all night, and if you had to guess, he probably hasn’t been fed or given bathroom breaks.

Still sniffling, face still wet with tears, you toss the blanket off your body and stand up. It’s uncomfortable, but not as outright painful as it was this morning. You shuffle over to the small kitchenette. There’s a small stove, a sink, and a minifridge, along with some pots, pans, plates, bowls, and silverware. You crouch in front of the fridge and peer inside. There are some basic things, like fruits and veggies, along with some stuff you would typically find in your fridge at home. You have no clue what he might like, so you grab an apple and some cucumber, heading over to the counter. You find a decently sharp knife - of course there are knives in the fucking cottages - and start slicing.

Once you’ve cut the apple and cucumber into slices, you put them in separate baggies, grab some crackers, and head to the door. Technically, you’re supposed to stay in bed all day to give your body time to heal, however you are a stubborn asshole who isn’t about to let another person suffer because of your failures. This wasn’t Komaeda’s fault. It was yours.

Luckily, everyone appears to have gone off somewhere other than anywhere near the cottages or the old building, so getting over there is easy. Nobody who would bother to stop you is around to do so.

As you hobble up the steps, Momomi appears before you, frantically waving her arms. “W-wait! You can’t come in here, it’s too dangerous!”

“If Komaeda-kun starves to death in there,” You glare down at her, the last thing on your mind is being friendly or putting up with her shit right now. “His blood will be on your hands.”

“Wa-wa- waaa!!” She cries out, but doesn’t stop you as you move past her and into the old building. Your side starts hurting, palms damp with sweat, but you press forward anyway. Taking a deep breath, you gently push the door open and peer inside.

Komaeda lifts his head as the door creaks open, smiling as you poke your head through. He’s laying on his side, legs bound and hands tied behind his back. “Ah, Amerikajin-san! Ohayou!”

It’s… like 3PM. And he just told you good morning. Then again, there are no windows in here, so maybe he just has no clue how long it’s been.

“Ima sanji goro desu.” You tell him, closing the door behind you. He hums as you hobble over, the ache in your side only getting worse as you approach him. You grunt as you lower yourself to the floor and cross your legs. He starts talking, but you don’t pick up on most of what he’s saying. He knows you can’t understand him, he’s just talking for the sake of talking. You let him. He’s been sitting here alone for who knows how long.

After a minute of listening to him, you open up the baggie of cucumber slices, taking one out and holding up to his lips. Without hesitation, he accepts it, chewing and swallowing before he talks again. “Sono wa yasashii hito desu.” ‘Yasashii’ means nice… is he calling you nice? Or maybe he means the cucumber was nice. No, wait, he used both ‘sono’ and ‘hito’. He was definitely giving you a compliment just now. Your face suddenly feels a bit warmer. Clearing your throat, you feed him another cucumber slice. “Arigato, Komaeda-kun.”

You feel like you say that a lot, but whatever. You keep feeding him, cycling between the apple, cucumber, and the crackers. He appears to have a preference for the cucumber and crackers, you notice. You do recall that he prefers salty things over sweet, so it makes sense. You focus more on those until you hold one out and he shakes his head, signaling to you that he’s done for now. You close the baggies and set them aside.

Your side still hurts a bit, so you decide to stay sitting a while longer. He starts talking again, and not a word of it makes sense to you, but you smile and watch him anyway. He’s looking in your direction, but it’s almost like he’s looking past you, his eyes unfocused and hazy. Even though he’s smiling, something tells you he’s not happy about something. 

Isn’t it part of his backstory that he got kidnapped as a child? Then being all tied up like this could very easily be a trigger. It would make sense if he just started rambling to cope with the stress, especially since he appeared to be dissociating as well. A pang of guilt shoots through you. He’s tied up because you failed. He’s upset because of you.

Reaching over him, you fiddle with the knot around his wrists, trying to loosen it at least a little so you can slip his hands out. He seems confused, but he doesn’t resist. Tugging at the rope, you manage to pull his hand through, discarding it and moving down to his ankles. He sits up, stretching his arms over his head with a groan. The rope around his ankles is much easier to get undone, and he seems grateful as he stretches out all his sore muscles.

When he’s done, he leans back on his hands, smiling at you. He chuckles softly. “Arigato, Amerikajin-kun.” He gestures vaguely to your side. “Itai ka?”

You nod. “Chiisai.” You’re not sure if ‘chiisai’ is supposed to be used in this context, since you’ve only seen it used to describe the size of something, but it seems to get the point across. He nods in understanding. Reaching into your pocket, you pull out the cat-shaped notepad, flipping through it to see if you have anything useful for this situation. Nanami had added a few new things regarding your injury, so nobody would be too worried. You flip to the page that says ‘it’s not too bad’ and flip it around, showing it to him.

Gently taking the notepad from you, he flips through until he finds what he’s looking for, turning it back around. ‘I am glad to see you.’

Oh no, he’s adorable.

Smiling, feeling your face get a bit warmer, you notice something on his hand as he hands the notepad back to you. You gently take his hand to get a closer look. It’s the cat scratch from before the party. Even though it was just a surface-level cut and you rinsed it right away, it looks like it got a little infected after all. A purple-ish bruise is forming around it.

You couldn’t even clean a cat scratch right. You were stupid to think you could stop a killing game.

Your vision blurs, a sob creeping its way up your throat. Komaeda seems confused, looking between his hand and your clearly upset face. “D-doushita no? Ne, daijoubu desu! Nani…” He trails off. Even if you wanted to, you wouldn’t be able to tell him why you were crying. Even if you spoke the same language as him.

You lower your head, burying your face in your hands. You were gonna die here, and end up stuck in the program with Monokuma until someone managed to shut it down. The likelihood of you making it home after this felt smaller and smaller with each passing moment. You couldn’t save anyone, and because of that, you were going to die. Maybe it was deserved. Maybe this is the universe’s way of punishing you for something you did.

Taking you by the arms, Komaeda tugs you closer, wrapping his long arms around you and squeezing you close in a hug. You hiccup and wrap your arms around him, burying your face in the fabric of his jacket. He smells like ivory soap and evergreen trees. 

It’s weird. Not once in your life did you think Komaeda Nagito would sit on the floor and hold you while you bawled like a baby. And yet, here you are, curled up and practically in his lap, muffling your sobs and clinging to him for dear life. One of his hands comes up and cradles the back of your head, and he shushes you. It’s nice.

In the quiet of the dining hall, you let yourself feel this pain. After all, it’s probably deserved.

Chapter Text

“You can’t just stay in bed forever.”

“Why not?” You mumble. “I’m resting, like you said.”

“It’s been two days. ” Nanami frowns. “Have you even seen anyone other than me and Tsumiki-chan?”

“Sonia comes by a lot.” You shrug, huffing slightly as you accidentally fall off a cliff in your game. “She asks me about American life, mostly. I don’t know how she isn’t as depressed as I am just hearing about it.”

Sighing heavily, she sits on the edge of your bed. She stares at the TV screen while you play for a moment. You’re glad your GameCube appeared here along with your games, because their familiarity is one of the few comforts you have right now. You’re playing an old Spongebob game you’ve had since you were little, trying to 100% your save file, but some of the sections are ridiculously hard, so you use skips from the speedrun to get by them.

“What are you doing?” Nanami asks after a long pause. You glance between her and the screen. “Trying to glitch my way into this container. It’s got a spatula in it.”

“And the spatulas are like stars in this game?”

“Yeah, basically.” You nod. “It’s your average early 2000’s collect-a-thon game, but it’s fun to play if you can get over the fact that it’s Spongebob themed.”

She hums softly. “So if it’s fun, why are you trying to glitch your way in there?”

“Because like any good game, some of the levels are complete bullshit.” You huff. “For this one, you have to hit a button, which drops a ball from the ceiling, which you then have to guide through a series of mazes and tracks which the ball could very easily fall off of, and land it in a hole on the other side of the room. Then this container opens and you can get the spatula. But it’s really hard, so instead I’m trying to learn how to clip in there.”

“So, you’re cheating?” Her head tilts. You roll your eyes. “I guess you could call it that. I’ve had this game since I was like, four years old, so I know how bullshit this room is. I don’t need validation from you.”

“I wasn’t trying to imply you did.” She looks away, frowning softly. “I don’t think cheating is necessarily a bad thing when part of a game is unfair. It’s not always an easier option, just a more fair one.”

“Yeah, this clip fuckin’ sucks. ” You groan as you slip out of place again. “But it’s a lot easier than trying to do the level normally. I’ve only managed to do this level the legit way once, and it took me hours of trying and failing. It’s a nightmare.”

“So you do the clip because it’s easier, and you don’t want to spend a long time trying and failing, right?” Her tone makes you narrow your eyes, pausing your game to look at her. “What are you getting at?”

“Nothing. It’s just…” She bites her lip, thinking for a moment before continuing. “... before Togami-kun… died, he told me I should try to view challenges through the lens of my talent. If I look at things like it’s a game, it’s easier to find a way to beat the level.”

“But this isn’t a game.” Your voice drops and you stare at the controller in your lap. “Not anymore, at least.”

“I’m just saying, if doing things the intended way isn’t working, you should try breaking the rules.” She shifts slightly in her spot. “There has to be a break in the collision somewhere. A place you can slip through the cracks and run around out of bounds until you get where you need to be.”

You don’t reply, taking a moment to consider what she’s saying. It’s not a bad idea, you suppose, but you wouldn’t even know where to begin. You’d already tried breaking the flow of events in the game, but that didn’t work. People still died. Maybe if you were more direct about it? Maybe if instead of trying to insert yourself where you didn’t belong, you just bashed yourself against walls until you broke something so badly the game couldn’t move forward. Find a game-ending bug, and everyone’s safe.

Sure. Yeah. That could work.

“Hey, Nanami-san?”

“Hm?”

“This might sound weird, and I get that maybe you can’t answer, but…” You fidget with the controller. “If you, like… if something happened to you. Would you come back? I mean, you’re an AI, so…”

“Nope!” Monomi’s voice chirps as she pops into the room, startling you. “Nobody ever thought that any of the avatars would be deleted, including ours. It would be difficult for us to be brought back if we were to get deleted.”

“Difficult,” You note, “But not impossible, right?”

“Why do you ask?” Nanami takes on a worried expression. “Is something going to happen?”

“... Not if I can stop it.” You mumble, gripping the blanket tightly in your hands. 

The monitor overhead lights up, and a moment later, Monokuma’s face pops up, his ear-piercing cackle filling the air. Nanami stands as he speaks, waiting for the monitor to go dark before turning to you. You sigh. “Jabberwock Park?”

“Let’s go.” She just extends her hand.

The walk there is a lot easier than it would’ve been a few days ago. According to Tsumiki, you’ve been healing remarkably fast. As long as you didn’t move weird and nothing brushed against that area, you hardly even noticed it was there. There was still some nasty bruising, but it looked a lot worse than it felt.

When you get there, things seem about as uneasy as you expected. You’re still getting weird looks - some particularly nasty ones from Soda and Nidai in particular, probably because you let Komaeda go the other day. Speaking of Komaeda, once he spots you, he’s quick to come over, a smile on his face. “Konbanwa, Amerikajin-kun.”

“Konbanwa.” You reply, glancing around. Looks like Monokuma hasn’t shown up yet. You hum softly. “Monokuma wa doko desu ka?” 

“Watashi wa koko desu!” A shrill voice booms from behind you, and you nearly leap three feet into the air, Placing a hand over your racing heart, you whirl around. “Asshole!”

“Language, Amerikajin!” He laughs, holding his round little belly, before switching over to Japanese to introduce the next motive. The arcade machine.

Nanami seems incredibly interested in it, talking faster and practically drooling over the arcade cabinet. You don’t understand most of what she’s saying, but you know how this goes. Monokuma unveils the game, saying he made it, and of course everyone is suspicious immediately. But then he says it’s a motive, which is just enough to get everyone curious.

Wait. No. You have to stop operating under the assumption that everything is exactly like the game. There’s a pretty major difference in this moment alone, that being Komaeda’s presence. At this point in the game, he was still tied up in the old building, but now he’s here with everyone else, talking about the game.

Encouraging everyone to play it. Because he thinks it will bring hope to them all.

You can’t let that happen. Nobody can play that game. You have to think of something, some way to stop anyone from so much as touching that arcade cabinet. If the photos inside were seen by anyone… you couldn’t let that happen. Kuzuryu can’t find out what happened to his sister.

“... Ne, Amerikajin-san?”

You blink, Komaeda’s voice snapping out of your thoughts. “H-huh?”

Nanami shifts uncomfortably on her feet. “He was asking if you agree with him. If… you think everyone should play the game.”

Pressing your lips together, you glance at Komaeda’s face before quickly, pointedly looking away. “I… Monokuma made that game, right? It seems like a trap… maybe we should all sleep on it, yeah? We can talk about it again in the morning, once our heads are clear.”

Nanami translates, and murmurs of agreement sound throughout the crowd. Sneaking a glance at Komaeda’s face, he seems… disappointed. A pang of guilt rolls through you, but you bite it back. You can’t forget that he’s willing to go out of his way to ensure another killing happens. It’s what he wants.

The nighttime announcement plays, and the crowd disperses, Nanami walking with you back to your cottage. You lock the door, turn out the lights, and wait silently in the dark.

Once all the lights in the other cabins are out, and have been for a while, you creep out your front door, careful not to make a sound. The moment you aren’t in earshot, you take off in a sprint towards the park. You need to be quick. 

When you get there, it’s completely empty. The moon shines overhead, casting light on the arcade cabinet. You walk over and crouch behind it, examining the panel on the back. There are four screws holding it in place, but they don’t look very tight. Fishing around in your pockets, you pull out your notepad with the Usami keychain still attached. Perfect. Using the edge of the keychain, you can carefully begin unscrewing the panel. It’s definitely scratching up the metal, but you don’t care. You’re on a mission.

“Hey! Destroying school property is strictly forbidden!” Monokuma appears atop the arcade machine, startling you. You glare up at him. “I’m not destroying it, I’m tinkering with it. There’s no rule against tinkering, is there?”

He growls, but doesn’t stop you as you continue detaching the panel from the back. Once you’ve pried it free, you’re met with an array of exposed wires and machinery. You stick your arm inside and start fishing around. Peering down at you, Monokuma tilts his head. “Whatcha doooin’?”

“Don’t distract me, dickweed.” You grumble, feeling around carefully for anything that may contain an envelope. Eventually, you find it, gasping in surprise that you were actually successful. Maybe there is hope, after all.You have to tug hard in order for it to come free, but when it does you heave a sigh of relief. Picking up the panel, you quickly start screwing it back in.

“Shit… hey, did you see where the last screw went?” You look up at Monokuma, but he isn’t there. Damn. You look around some more, but can’t find the missing screw. You decide to give up, tucking the envelope under your sweater and hurrying back to the first island as quickly as possible. 

Now, what to do with this envelope? You could burn it, but how would you justify setting a fire in the middle of Summer on a tropical Island? Just ripping up the photos wouldn’t work, if someone gathered all the pieces they could easily put them all together. You needed a way to make sure they would never be seen by anyone.

As you round the corner onto the hotel grounds, you freeze. Straight ahead, Hinata stands by the pool with his back to you, hands tucked in his pockets. Fuck. Shit. Oh god no. Okay, maybe if you move quickly, but quietly, you can make it to your cottage without notifying him of your presence. 

Holding your breath and hoping to hell and back you aren’t caught, you haul ass over to your cottage door, quickly stepping inside and pulling the door shut behind you. Once it’s locked, you heave a sigh of relief. You’re back in your cottage, safe and sound, with the envelope in tow. You take it out from under your sweater, examining it closely. It just looks like a normal envelope.

But it’s not, is it? In this envelope, there’s photos of people who, if you didn’t know better, you might consider your friends. Photos of them laughing and having fun, with no idea of the horrors lying ahead.

Carefully pulling the envelope open, you reach inside, feeling the cool, laminated surface of the pictures between your fingertips. Taking a deep breath, you pull them out, and immediately your stomach churns, threatening to spill its contents all over the floor. 

The photo directly on top was a gruesome sight. In the game, Kuzuryu’s sister just kinda looked slumped over, with pink paint splattered over her face. But real-life dead bodies don’t look like sleepy anime girls. Her skull was practically caved in, all of her surroundings coated in her blood. Dropping the photos, you clap a hand over your mouth and suppress the urge to vomit.

With its bright pink blood and anime art style, sometimes you forget how dark the subject matter of this game is, even though the story’s kind of nonsensical. 

Swallowing hard, you pick the photos up again, flipping the stack over so you don’t have to look at that again. That’s an image that won’t leave your brain any time soon. You shakily make your way over to the bathroom, staring at the back of the photos before ripping them apart in your bare hands. It’s difficult to do with the lamination, but you manage, dropping them into the toilet bowl along with the envelope, which you also tore up. Then you flushed it all away, which took a couple tries to ensure everything went down.

Exhausted, you crawl into bed, but the moment you close your eyes, the jagged edges of that girl’s skull jab their way into your mind. It’s like the picture is glued to the back of your eyelids.

This is going to be a long night.

Chapter Text

You crawl out of bed the next morning feeling like a zombie. Hopping in the shower helps, but not a lot. You managed to get a little sleep, but not much. You get dressed sluggishly before stumbling out the door to go to breakfast. You hadn’t left your cottage of your own free will in at least a few days, but you had to ensure nothing went wrong, or Monokuma didn’t pull some bullshit. You did not just view a picture of a human corpse for Monokuma to make another one. 

Bile rises in your throat at the memory, but you swallow hard, forcing it back down. You had to pretend everything was normal. Everything was fine.

When you walk in, almost everyone is there, save for Kuzuryu - typical - and Nanami. Sonia’s there, though, and her eyes light up as she spots you, hurrying over. “My friend! You have decided to join us again!”

You smile at her. “Yeah, I figured spending all day sulking wouldn’t fix anything. As long as I take it easy, I should be fine. The wound’s scabbed over now.” You gesture to your side, and her smile twitches as she nods in acknowledgement. “I see. Then, do you think you would be able to go to the beach today?”

“The beach? Why?” You tilt your head. 

“Well, several of the girls were going to go, and Koizumi-san thought it would be kind to invite you as well.” Sonia explains, her smile restoring itself. “It is meant to be a bonding trip between everyone. We thought you may enjoy coming along as well.”

“Uh… I might need to ask Tsumiki-san first.” You laugh awkwardly. “I’m not sure if I’m healed enough to get in the water, but I’ll still come hang out even if I can’t.”

“I see. Then, Tsumiki-chan!” She takes you by the hand, whirling around as she calls out for Tsumiki and pulls you over to her. The nurse squeaks in surprise and cowers as if she’s about to be hit. You frown softly. Wasn’t there something in her backstory that hinted about her being abused as a kid? You swear you’ve heard that before. Poor girl.

Tsumiki takes a look at your wound, and determines that getting it wet shouldn’t be an issue, but all the movement involved with swimming might tear something. It would be better to wait a few more days. You're simultaneously disappointed and relieved.

After breakfast, you go with Sonia to the supermarket in an attempt to find you a swimsuit to wear. There’s plenty of options, but most of them leave your torso completely bare, leaving your wound visible. It felt entirely too vulnerable, not to mention you didn’t want to remind anyone about… what happened. You frowned slightly. “Maybe I’ll wear a t-shirt I don’t care about over everything…”

“Ah! Amerikajin-san!” A voice calls out, and you turn to see Komaeda walking up to you. From the corner of your eye, you notice Sonia visibly stiffening. Choosing to pretend you didn’t see it, you offer a smile to him. “Komaeda-kun. Konnichiwa.”

He says something you don’t understand, and you hear Sonia translate stiffly. “He would like to know what you are doing.”

“Picking out swimsuits so I can go to the beach later.” You gesture to the rack behind you. “Tsumiki-san said it would be alright as long as I don’t over-exert myself.” Sonia translates, and Komaeda nods, looking at the rack and humming softly. 

Monokuma leaps up from the center of the rack, startling all three of you. He’s holding the skimpiest bikini you have ever seen in your life. It’s like someone glued shoelaces together and called it a swimsuit. Cackling, he waves it in your face. “Hey, hey, wear this one to the beach! Show off your American figure!”

You cringe at the thought. “No. Go away.”

“Aw, come on! Don’t you want Komaeda-kun to see how you look in a skimpy little bathing suit like this one?” He holds it up to his body to show it off. Your face glows bright red as you sputter, scrambling for a defense. It only makes him laugh harder. “Don’t think I didn’t notice! You look at him like you wanna ride him into next week! You sure are lucky he’s dense, y’know.”

Komaeda looks at Sonia and asks something, but you cut her off the moment she opens her mouth. “Don’t you dare translate anything he’s saying, Sonia! I will never forgive you if you do!”

Sonia closes her mouth, pressing her lips together before softly apologizing to Komaeda. Thank god. 

“Is the widdle Amewican baby being shy? ” Monokuma leans in close to your face. “Where’s that bravery you all never shut the hell up about? Can’t work up the courage to tell a guy you’re into him?” Reaching out a paw, he boops you on the nose, and you flinch. “How cute! Ne, Komaeda-kun, Amerikajin wa kawaii desu ka?” 

Komaeda stiffens, a soft pink color rising to his face as he glances between you and Monokuma. Oh, hell no. Monokuma can make you uncomfortable all day if he wants, but you draw the line when he drags anyone else into it. Grabbing the bikini from him, you turn around and chuck it as far across the supermarket as you can manage. “Go, fetch!”

“Heyyy! Give that back!” He rages, hopping down from the rack and marching across the floor like an angry toddler to retrieve the bikini. You look at Sonia. “Let’s hurry and get out of here before he comes back.” She nods, briefly relaying that to Komaeda, and the three of you run from the supermarket to avoid dealing with that stupid fucking bear again.

Once the three of you are a decent distance away, you stop to catch your breath. Your side hurts from the exertion, a pained wheeze escapes as you place a hand over it. It doesn’t feel like you’ve torn it open, but it does hurt like a motherfucker. You look up at the other two - Sonia is straightening out her skirt, while Komaeda leans over with his hands on his knees, breathing deeply, slight wheezes at the end of each exhale. Right. He was super sick in-game, wasn’t he? Running is probably really stressful on his body. He coughs roughly, and it sounds painful. You grimace.

You reach out to him, opening your mouth to ask if he’s okay, but Sonia quickly takes you by the arm, shouting something in Japanese that you’re too startled to understand. She drags you away before you can protest, her pace quick and her grip tight. She yanks your arm a bit harder when you stumble. It hurts.

“You may borrow a bathing suit from my cottage, if you wish.” She starts talking, filling the air before your brain can even catch up with what’s happening. “I have many, in a multitude of colors. You may choose whichever you would like, as I have already set my own aside for the occasion.”

The ache in your side becomes a sharp, stabbing pain. “Sonia-”

“We may also go by your cottage afterwards to grab some necessities.” She either doesn’t hear you or doesn’t care. You hope it’s the former - she’s not even looking at you, instead marching straight ahead. “Sunscreen, beach towels, an overshirt if you would like. I recall you mentioning that.”

“Sonia, please-” You try to wriggle your arm free, but she only tightens her hold and gives you another yank, causing you to stumble. She speeds up a bit. “We should move quickly, so Monokuma does not catch up and attempt to force you into that awful swimsuit-”

“Sonia, please, you’re hurting me!”

That’s what finally gets her to stop dead in her tracks, releasing your arm. You crumple to the ground, clutching your side. You frantically stick your hand up under your sweater to feel around the stitches, and thankfully, they’re all still firmly in place. You breathe a small sigh of relief as Sonia sits on the ground in front of you, her face solemn. “... My deepest apologies, friend. It was not my intention to bring you pain.”

“What was that about?” You ask, still holding your side. “That doesn’t feel very in-character for you, y’know?”

“... Was Monokuma… telling the truth?” She meets your eyes, her icy blue irises boring into your soul. “Do you like Komaeda-kun?”

You feel your face get a bit warmer, your brain short-circuiting in an attempt to form a response. Sure, you had liked Komaeda when he was a fictional character, but now he was a real human being, and a very messed up one at that. But still… he was always kind and patient with you, no matter what. 

“It’s… complicated.” You finally answer, averting your gaze. “I think he’s nice, but… he’s also… a little strange sometimes.”

Sonia grips the end of her skirt. “I understand that you were not here for the trial, but… Komaeda-kun is… a very dangerous boy. I advise you to stay away from him, if at all possible.”

“I don’t think that’s necessary.” You reply, shifting slightly. The ache is beginning to subside. “I get that he’s messed up, but he doesn’t deserve to be completely outcast, does he? Won’t that just encourage him to do more dangerous things?”

“You were not there.” Her voice is suddenly stern. “I can forgive you for letting him go, as you did not see the look in his eye as he described how he planned to kill someone that night. However, I cannot stand by and allow you to put yourself in danger by befriending him. You will only get yourself killed. I will not let you do that.”

She’s… really serious about this. More intense than you’ve ever seen her get about anything, even her questions about living as an American. There’s no way you can get her to budge, and you know it.

“... I’m not going to lie to you. If I want to spend time with him, I will.” You state, keeping your voice as even as possible. “But I’ll take what you’ve said into consideration, and if he does anything I find suspicious - anything at all - I’ll tell you right away.”

She hesitates, but gives in, nodding softly. “I understand. I cannot force you to do anything. All I ask is that you be careful.”

“Of course.” You push yourself up to your feet. “Is Nanami up yet? I didn’t see her at breakfast.”

“Ah, she may have been up late playing a video game.” Sonia rises as well, dusting off her dress. “Shall we retrieve her?”

“I’ll do it - you go on and get changed. I’ll meet you at the diner, alright?”

“Okay.” With a soft smile and a wave, you part ways with her, heading towards the hotel. You’re walking a bit lopsided due to the dull pain in your side, but you figure you’ll have time to rest at the beach.

Walking down the dock and towards Nanami's cottage, you realize something strange.

“That’s weird.” You murmur. “Her door is open…”

You poke your head into her cottage, completely decked out with posters from popular games, several consoles hooked to her TV with the cords all tangled, and bookshelves of strategy guides lining the walls. Your mouth drops open in awe as you step inside. This is the gamer pad of your dreams - there’s even a beanbag chair in the corner!

The layout is much the same as your own cottage. Her kitchenette looks untouched, save for a few plates in the sink and some soda cans and water bottles in the trash can. You can hear the sound of the shower running. Taking a shower with your front door wide open? A pit forms in your stomach as you approach the bathroom door and knock. “Nanami-san? Your door was open, is everything okay?”

No response. 

“Nanami-san!” You raise your voice even louder. “Are you okay? If you don’t answer, I’m going to open the door!”

Nothing.

Taking a deep breath, you turn the doorknob and push, but the door doesn’t budge. Weird. If it was locked, you wouldn’t be able to turn the knob at all, but the knob turns just fine. You push again. It feels like something is holding the door closed…

You brace yourself against the door and shove with all your might, and finally, it budges just a little. Steam pours out of the room, along with a lot of water. It has a faint red tint to it. Your heart stops.

“Nanami-san?! Please, let me in!” You push again and the door opens another inch. Groaning in frustration, you take a step back, suck in a deep breath, and sprint at the door, throwing your body against it as hard as you can. It pushes open, something on the other side falling down with a thunk. Now you have enough room to shimmy inside.

The floor is wet and slippery, the water tinted slightly pink. On the floor in front of the door, crumpled in an uncomfortable position, is Nanami Chiaki, in a pool of her own blood.

Chapter Text

Her chest rises and falls. She coughs once.

Alive. The word drifts into your head as if someone else put it there.

And then you’re running.

You have no direction, no idea where to go. You just keep running. You stop briefly at the intersection between the cottages and the gate to the hotel, wondering if you should check the hotel for people, but you quickly decide you have a better chance of finding someone at the diner on the second island. At the very least, you know Sonia should be there. Probably Hinata and Soda too.

You take off, running faster than you thought you were capable of. You have to be quick. How long has she been laying there? What happened? Could you have stopped it?

You don’t have time for thinking. Only running. The bridge between the central and second island feels miles long and your lungs burn, but you don’t dare slow down, despite the ache in all your limbs and the sharp, stabbing pain in your side. Your heart pounding drowns out all thoughts other than ‘ find help.’

You spot the diner in the distance and almost cry out. The islands are big, and you’ve run quite a long way already, certainly much farther than you’re used to. But you can’t stop. You have to get help.

You burst through the diner door like a bat out of hell. You quickly note everyone who’s there - Hinata, Soda, Komaeda, Kuzuryu - fuck. Nobody who can understand you. Hinata stands up quickly, brow furrowing in concern as he reaches out to you. You shake your head, struggling to catch your breath so you can speak, your brain jumping into overdrive to try and piece together a comprehensible sentence. “H-Hinata-kun! Tasukete!”

The others have stood up too, and Soda points at your torso, saying something. Taking you gently by the arms, Hinata tries to pull you towards a chair to sit you down, and you glance at your side. You realize that your shirt is completely soaked with blood. You probably aggravated it too much and popped a stitch. Fuck. Now that you’re aware of it, the pain really starts to set in, but you shake your head frantically. “Iie, iie!” You wiggle out of his grip and grab his arm, tugging him towards the door. “Tasukete!”

They’re talking quickly amongst each other, probably trying to figure out what the fuck is going on, but you don’t have the time or the words to explain. You dig frantically in your pocket and pull out the notepad, flipping through until you find the ‘Follow me.’ page and turn it around. His face shifting from confused to determined, Hinata nods, and you turn and sprint out of the diner, with him right behind you. You think you hear other footsteps as well, but you aren’t paying attention.

Back across the long ass bridges to the first island, shoving the gate open and nearly stumbling to the ground from exhaustion. You wonder if you’ve seriously fucked your wound up at this point, but the thought leaves your brain in a split second. You force yourself to keep going, your vision blurring as you lead Hinata into Nanami’s cottage. You trip walking through the door and tumble to the ground, your breath coming out ragged, your whole body shaking. 

Hinata’s next to you, saying something, but you don’t have the brain power to think in Japanese right now. The floor is wet. Why is the floor wet? The sound of running water hits your ears and you remember, lifting a shaky hand to point at the bathroom door. Following your finger, Hinata hurries over to the bathroom while Kuzuryu takes his place next to you, applying pressure to your bleeding side. You watch Hinata push the door open, turning sideways to slide through, and then brace yourself as he cries out.

The next few minutes are a whirlwind of raised voices saying things you don’t understand as your vision comes in and out of focus. Are you this dizzy because of adrenaline, pain, or blood loss? Probably a combination of the three. Hinata, probably noticing that Nanami is still alive, stays in the bathroom with her while Kuzuryu stays with you. He says something to you, but you don’t know what. You just shake your head. It’s all you can manage to do.

Eventually, Soda and Komaeda come in with Tsumiki, Koizumi, Saionji, and Pekoyama in tow. For a moment, Tsumiki tries to fuss over you, but she’s quickly redirected to the one who actually needs her help more than you right now. Koizumi crouches in front of you and tries to talk to you, but you just stare at her with unfocused eyes. Behind her, Saionji says something that makes her whip her head around and scold her. Then Komaeda sits on your other side, giving you a small smile. The room sways as you smile back.

He points to your side. “Itai ka?”

You nod. “I think I fucked up…” You mumble, blinking slowly at him. Reaching out, he grabs the bottom of your shirt, looking back up at your face for any sign of discomfort. You give him another nod, and he lifts it up to reveal the injury. You turn your head to look, but one of his hands comes to hold your chin and make you face him. The world is blurry. All you can see is his smile. They’re doing something to your injury, but you’re distracted.

“Hello.” He says, carefully, a nervous glint in his eye. You blink once, twice, as you struggle to process it. Then you grin. “Komaeda-kun, kakkoii…” You mumble, giggling.

Seeming the slightest bit more confident, he continues. “My name is Komaeda Nagito. It is nice to meet you.”

Has he been studying? How have you not heard him speak English before? It doesn’t sound the same as his English dub voice, it’s entirely unique and his own, unlike Monokuma or Nanami.

Nanami.

“Nanami-san…” You mumble as your brain struggles to catch up. “Nanami-san wa daijoubu desu ka?”

His smile falters as he glances behind you, towards the bathroom door. You jump and yelp as something rubs against your side, moving to yank your body away, but in the next moment Komaeda is wrapped around you, his arms pinning yours to your chest so you won’t wriggle away. His chest against your back, legs spread around you and holding you firmly, you feel calm. He smells nice. Like ivory soap and something Earthy. Evergreen trees?

He’s so undeniably real. 

How is he real?

He shouldn’t be.

Tears prick your eyes as you lean against him, sucking in a shaky breath as a sterile bandage from a first-aid kit is pressed against your wound. He squeezes you tighter. “Gomen ne, Amerikajin-kun.”

You shake your head, letting a sob escape you. You weren’t crying because of the pain, though it was a contributing factor. You weren’t crying because you were restrained, or even because you were afraid for Nanami. All of these were just blocks in the Jenga tower of your mental health, each one making you increasingly more unstable.

“I’m not going home, am I?” You ask people who can’t understand you. They shoot nervous looks at each other as you take in another shaky breath. “There’s no way home, is there? I’m stuck here forever.”

Of course, you don’t get a response, but you expected that. You were surrounded by people desperately trying to help you, but you were still completely alone. 

You sobbed openly, clinging to Komaeda’s arms as they tightened further around you. When you were patched up and your shirt was lowered, you didn’t stop crying. You couldn’t. An indescribable loneliness settled in your chest as you sat there, bawling like a toddler being left at daycare for the first time.

Pausing in your wailing for breath, for a split second you hear Komaeda’s voice, soft in your ear.

“You are okay. I am here.”

It’s simple. They’re beginner-level phrases that he likely pieced together on his own and isn’t quite sure if the grammar is right. But he’s trying.

Your cries wind down into small whimpers as you cling to him, exhaustion washing over you. Your limbs ache, your throat hurts, your eyes are bleary and unfocused. Part of you wants to sit there forever, cradled in his arms, the one person who was making an effort to understand you.

You blink, and suddenly Sonia is there, crouching before you, taking your hands. She waits until you focus your gaze on her, then smiles, the expression strained. “My friend. Are you hurt?”

You think for a moment, brain still lagging. “... I think… I tore it open.”

“That’s okay. It’s been handled now - you’re going to be okay.” Her voice is strong, but soft, comforting. You swallow thickly. “Nanami-san… is she alright?”

“She is alive.” Sonia replies slowly. “She has been badly injured. Tsumiki-san is tending to her now, and will look after her until she has recovered.” You nod, sniffling, looking around the room again. It’s still an awesome fucking room. You hope you get to hang out with Nanami in it later. That beanbag chair looks comfy. Sonia squeezes your hands and pulls your focus back to her. “My friend, I know you are confused and worried right now, but I must ask you. What happened?”

You blink slowly, fighting your brain to remember exactly what happened. “... I came to get Nanami-san, like I told you I was going to… but the door was open. I thought it was weird, so I came inside. Then… I heard the shower running.” You look over at the door, slightly ajar. You can see Hinata and Tsumiki’s legs as they tend to Nanami. “I asked if she was okay, but she didn’t answer, so I went in and…” Your voice cracks as the scene flashes before your eyes again.

“That must have been a horrifying sight to come across.” Sonia’s steady voice keeps you from breaking down again. You’re sure that if Komaeda were to let go of you right now or if Sonia were to falter, you’d crumble to dust like a vampire in the sunlight. “Did you notice anything strange about the room?”

Your memory comes back in short bursts. “The door was stuck shut. I think… she was leaning against it. It took all my weight to get it open.”

She nods. “Is that all?”

You think hard. “She coughed. Just once. Then I ran to get help.”

Her thumb brushes gently over your knuckles, keeping you grounded so you don’t get lost in the memory. “Is there anything else you recall?”

“... No. I’m sorry. I didn’t know what to do, so I just took off without thinking.” You sniffle, hands shaking, voice cracking. “I-I just… left her here. Alone. How long was she lying here before I found her?”

“We don’t know that yet, but we will find out.” Sonia states as if it’s fact, as if she can see into the future and knows what’s in store. “Do not worry. We will find whoever did this to her, I assure you. Until then, would you like me to take you back to your cottage? You need to be still.”

“No!” You say quickly, grasping her hands frantically. “Please, no, don’t make me go back alone! I have to help, I have to!”

“I know you are worried and want to help,” Sonia stands, holding your hands firmly. “But there is nothing you can do right now. Please, I implore you to wait in your cottage and rest.”

“No.” You say again, much more stern. “I won’t be alone. Please don’t leave me, Sonia.”

She grimaces, guilt and shame washing over her expression in a flash of momentary weakness. She stares at you a moment, weighing her options, before letting out a frustrated sigh. “How would you… like to stay with Komaeda-kun, then?”

“... Huh?” Confused, you tilt your head.

She looks behind you, at Komaeda, and says something you don’t understand. He hesitates, then nods, and she looks back at you with a smile. “Go with Komaeda-kun, okay? You won’t be alone. He will stay with you until everything is better.”

Gently, he pulls you to your feet, and you’re too tired to protest. As long as you aren’t alone, with images of Kuzuryu’s sister’s caved in skull swimming around in your head alongside Nanami’s limp body on her bathroom floor.

The world blends together as he shuffles with you over to his cottage, opening the door and helping you inside. Your legs feel wobbly underneath you, but he’s holding on, keeping you steady, even though he feels a bit wobbly too.

Why is he helping you? Why is he holding you like this? What’s the point? How does this further his twisted idea of hope?

You wish you could ask, but you can’t. Nanami is unconscious and Sonia is trying to help figure out why. You don’t have the words to ask him, and even if you did, you probably wouldn’t be able to understand his answer. He sits you down on the edge of his bed and hurries over to his closet, rummaging around in there for a moment before returning with a plain white t-shirt and a pair of pajama pants. 

He holds the clothes out to you, and you look at them, confused. He gestures to your side, and you glance down. Ah. Right. You are covered in your own blood. You smile, taking the clothes from him. “Arigato, Komaeda-kun.”

You grab the bottom of your shirt and start to lift, but a hand on your wrist quickly stops you. You look up at him, confused. His face red, he points across the room to the bathroom door. Oh. Right. You push yourself to your feet, but your legs wobble until you lose your balance and fall back down again. You blink slowly up at him, then give an awkward smile. You weren’t making it to the bathroom.

Komaeda just smiles, reaching out to help you to your feet. He lets you lean on him as you cross the room together, and he pushes the door open with his foot, guiding you inside. You lean against the counter as he shuts the door, and you notice he chooses not to lock it. 

Gently, he pushes you into the counter, putting his hands under your armpits and lifting until you get the message and sit next to the sink. He nods, then pushes the drain stopper down and turns on the water, checking the temperature before receiving a small washcloth from the bathtub. For a moment, you wonder why he wouldn’t just help you into the bath, then remember that you have a fresh bandage on and that would not go well.

Once the sink is full, he turns off the water, shucking off his jacket and hanging it on the door. He produces a hair tie from his pocket, pulling his unruly white hair back, away from his face. You watch his fingers perform the practiced motion of twisting the hair tie around his hair until he lets it fall into a messy ponytail on the back of his head. A few tufts are still hanging loosely around his face when he looks at you again, his face flushed with a soft pink tint.

He’s cute.

He reaches for the bottom of your shirt, looking up at your face for permission. You nod, lifting your arms over your head as he tugs the garment off your body. He tosses it into his laundry basket, keeping his gaze pointedly on your wound and nowhere else. Dipping the washcloth in the water and giving it a squeeze, he takes it to your skin, wiping away any dried blood that isn’t obscured by the bandage. The water is warm. You let out a soft sigh.

Never in your life did you think you would be receiving what is basically a sponge bath from Komaeda Nagito, but you aren’t in a position to complain.

His other hand rests gently on your hip, likely to hold you in place as he runs the cloth over your skin. He dips it back in the water, squeezes, then returns it. After he deems you clean enough, he grabs the replacement shirt and unfolds it, and you hold out your arms, letting him help you get it on. You could probably do that part yourself, but you can’t help but feel a little enamored, watching him fawn over you like this. He’s doing all this for you.

He reaches for the waistband of your pants, and that’s what gets you to blush. Lifting yourself off the counter with your hands, he tucks his fingers through your belt loops, tugging down until the garment is off your body. He tosses it into the hamper. There’s blood down your right thigh, where it had dripped down from your ribs into your pants. He takes the washcloth to it, careful to avoid your underwear. That’s bloody too, but you aren’t about to strip completely naked in front of him.

He keeps you steady with a hand on your knee, wiping you down with what you can only describe as precision. Trying to be as respectful as possible while you’re sitting here, in your underwear, in one of his shirts while he wipes blood off you. It feels like something out of a cheesy spy movie. Only in the movies, it’s not your blood.

Deeming your thigh clean, he grabs the pajama pants and holds them open, guiding your legs into the holes and pulling them up. You lift yourself off the counter again so he can tug them over your hips, sitting back down again and looking up at him. He’s taller than you like this, and you notice his face is much more red than before. Suddenly, you realize he never answered Monokuma’s question.

“Ne… Komaeda-kun?” You mumble, the tiredness you felt creeping into your voice. He hums softly, and if he was a dog you swear his ears would’ve perked up. You can’t stop yourself from smiling. “... Komaeda-kun wa kawaii desu.”

The pink shade deepens in hue as he laughs softly, looking away. “Ah… iie.” He shakes his head. You nod, stubborn and defiant. “Hai. Komaeda-kun wa… yasashii… kawaii…” Your brain short circuits trying to think of more adjectives, but when you look up at his face again, you nearly burst out laughing. “Komaeda-kun wa aka desu!”

He’s blushing so hard he looks like he’s about to explode. Clearing his throat, he helps you down from the counter, and together the two of you shuffle back across the room, where he sits you on the edge of his bed. He sits down next to you with a soft sigh, closing his eyes and seeming to think for a moment.

You rest your head on his shoulder, and he stiffens for a moment before relaxing underneath you. You take a moment to look around his room. It’s nearly exactly the same as yours, save for a few plants and some candles here and there, none of which are lit. You suppose with luck like his, having matches or lighters around is a terrible idea.

“It’s cool that you’re real now, Komaeda-kun.” Head still spinning, you mutter softly, more to yourself than to him. “Even if I can’t go home, and I can’t really speak to you, it was nice of the universe to give me this, even for a little bit.” He hums softly, a confused sound, but you couldn’t explain even if you tried. Leaning against him, letting your eyes drift closed, you give yourself a moment of peace. You haven’t had one in a while.

Chapter Text

You aren’t aware that you’ve fallen asleep until you’re waking up. Something soft, squishy, and warm is underneath you. You have a pounding headache and you grimace as you drag your eyes open, confused.

This isn’t your cottage. It doesn’t smell the same. It smells like… cotton and… pine needles? What? You shift slightly, trying to get a grasp of what’s going on. Your memory blurs together into a blob of colors and emotions. Panic, confusion, frustration, red, blue, pink. It flashes before you but doesn’t make sense. You can’t put it together into a cohesive story.

A hand comes to rest on your upper back, and you lift your head, the fog of memory parting. Komaeda. That’s right. You’re with Komaeda.

Your head was resting on his stomach as he laid back, with you curled up and the blankets pulled over you. You’re wearing his clothes, laying in his bed… oh, god.

You turn your head to look up at him, and he smiles down at you. There’s a book open in his other hand, but he quickly folds the corner of the page over and closes it. His hair is pulled back into a ponytail. He isn’t wearing his jacket. He tilts his head at you. “Ohayou, Amerikajin-san.”

Good morning? Is it morning? Or is he just saying that because you just woke up? Feeling your face get warmer, you move to push yourself up, but a sharp pain in your side sends you back down on the mattress. You groan softly as Komaeda sits up. He reaches over to the bedside table, picking up a folded sheet of paper and handing it to you. Rolling onto your back, your head now on his lap instead of his stomach, you take the paper and carefully unfold it. It’s a note, written in English, with practiced, pristine handwriting.

    My friend,

    Tsumiki-chan and I came to look at your wounds, but you seemed very disoriented and drowsy. Tsumiki-chan said you likely lost quite a bit of blood and would need time to recover. She may have to re-stitch your wound if it does not close on its own. Please remain in bed this time. I have instructed Komaeda-kun to not allow you to leave, but if you manage to convince him otherwise, please understand you will be met with great disappointment from me.

    Nanami-san is badly injured. She may have a concussion, but it is hard to tell as of now. She is still unconscious as I write this, but if there are any updates on her condition I will notify you immediately.

    I do not like that I must leave you alone with Komaeda-kun, but as you can imagine, this event has led to unrest and fear among everyone. Though I am merely a figurehead, I feel it is my duty as a Princess to bring comfort and peace to us once more. Myself and Hinata-kun will be investigating what happened, and when we find who attacked Nanami-san, we will deal with them accordingly.

    Please stay in bed, and please be wary of Komaeda-kun. I have left him with a few flash cards similar to yours, so he may communicate with you. I will be back frequently to check up on you. Please let me know if he does anything you do not like.

    Sincerely yours,

    Sonia Nevermind

Right. Now it’s coming back. The image of Nanami’s body infiltrates your brain and glues itself front and center. Suddenly, you feel nauseous. Hands shaking, you fold the note back up, swallowing thickly as hot tears roll down your cheeks. She’s hurt. Badly. But alive.

“Itai ka?” Komaeda asks softly. Sniffling, you shake your head. You weren’t crying due to the pain, you were deeply worried and frustrated. Nanami, one of the few people here who understood you and the only person who knew the full truth, was fighting for her life.

If she died, you would be completely, utterly alone.

This didn’t happen in the game. This shouldn’t be happening - she should be alive. It should be Koizumi who got her head bashed in, not Nanami. Maybe thinking that way makes you a terrible person, but right now, you don’t care.

You rub your eyes as Komaeda reaches over to the bedside table, flipping through some small note cards before finding what he needs and holding it up so you can read it. You sniffle as you focus your eyes on it. 

‘Go to sleep.’ It says, in Sonia’s pristine handwriting, like every letter was a masterpiece she must have spent hours on. Once you’ve read it, he slides it back into the stack, looking through again until he finds another one. ‘Everything is okay.’

You look past the note card, up to his face, and he’s smiling. His nose crinkles when he smiles sometimes. It makes a warmth bloom in your chest. You can’t help but smile back. Even though most of the time his smile is fake, a vacant, neutral expression meant to make him seem friendlier, somehow he always pulls out a real one right when you need it. Like he’s reading your mind and knows exactly what face to make.

You look over towards the window, noticing the sky is much darker than you last remember it being. How long were you asleep? You furrow your brow. “Komaeda-kun, ima nanji desu ka?” 

“Ah, hachiji desu.” He replies. It’s 8 PM? Since fucking when?

You just woke up, so you aren’t particularly tired. You search your brain for a phrase that makes sense in this situation. “Watashi wa… oyasumi janai desu.” You think that vaguely translates to ‘I won’t goodnight’ or something, but it earns a giggle from him, so you figure he must have understood, even if you sounded silly.

“Janai?” He tilts his head, still laughing. He goes on to say something else, but you don’t understand any of it. You listen anyway, watching as he begins going off on some rant. He gets really into it, waving his hands around, nearly losing his breath at times. Loose strands of his hair bounce around his face, framing him in a cloud of white.

When he pauses for breath, you nuzzle your cheek against his stomach. “Komaeda-kun kawaii desu.”

He looks down at you, seemingly caught off guard. You shouldn’t be looking at him like this. You shouldn’t be laying here, with your head in his lap while he rambles on and on about hope, calling him cute and making him red in the face. But when will you get a chance like this again? Should you really be spending all your time trying and failing to stop deaths from happening, when you could be living out your isekai fantasy right here?

Closing your eyes, you focus hard on him. His skin is warm, he smells like Earth and rain and fresh laundry. He’s solid, he’s real. Your head is in his lap.

Like it or not, the home you remember, you’ll likely never return to. While that thought felt horrifying at first, leaving behind your friends and family for a place nobody knew or understood you, but right now it felt normal. Like that’s the way things are, the way they always would be, so it was pointless to fuss over it. 

Then, something forces its way into your mind. Images, a memory that isn’t yours. It blurs at the edge of your brain, comes in and out of focus. You reach for it without thinking, pulling it closer, peering inside. You see a bathroom, and into it walks Nanami. She doesn’t look at you, but you call out anyway. She turns and a black blur rushes at her, knocking her over, and her head smacks into the edge of the tub. 

You pull back, eyes snapping open with a start. The room is dark. Your head is no longer in Komaeda’s lap. You’re still in his bed, though, blankets pulled over you. You carefully sit up, looking around. You spot him over on the couch, asleep. He’s so tall his legs hang off it.

Slowly, carefully, you sit up, minding your injury. You don’t know what time it is, but it’s probably pretty late. You slide out from under the covers, unsure of your own intent. Why get up? You don’t need to use the bathroom. You should go back to sleep.

Nanami. You’re worried about Nanami, aren’t you?

Nanami is fine.

Go back to sleep.

But you stand still, trying to will your body to move. To walk out the door, down the dock to Nanami's cottage. You just need to see her for yourself. You need to verify she’s okay.

She’s fine. Please lay back down. You’re of no use to anyone when you’re like this.

You turn back around and crawl onto the bed, pulling the blanket up to your chin and drifting back to sleep.

Chapter Text

The sunlight warms you gently. The blanket over your body feels like it clings to your skin. Your entire body feels damp, and you’re uncomfortable before you even manage to open your eyes. You squirm, tossing the blanket off of you, a displeased whine seeping from your throat as you roll over, looking around the room. It’s morning now, but Komaeda is nowhere to be seen. 

Lowering your feet to the floor, you push yourself up to stand and immediately regret it. Your entire body feels weak, legs shaking underneath you. You lean back so that when you fall, you land on the bed with a soft grunt. 

Head spinning, you struggle to wrap your head around what’s happening. Is it because of your wound? Lifting your shirt to check underneath the bandage, it looks fine, about on par with what you would expect from it at this point. It doesn’t sting particularly bad or look infected. If it’s not infected, then why do you feel so horrible?

You open your mouth to call out for Komaeda, but no sound comes out. The air pushes past your lips, but they won’t form words, and your vocal chords aren’t doing their job. Raising a hand, you feel your throat. It’s just skin, nothing special waiting there. What’s happening to you? Why won’t your voice cooperate?

The bathroom door opens and Komaeda steps out, rubbing a towel over his hair, apparently having just gotten out of the shower. Once he deems his hair dry enough, he lowers the towel, his gaze landing on you almost immediately. He smiles. “Ah, good morning, American.”

Wait.

What?

His head tilts, friendly smile melting into a concerned look. “Hey, American, are you alright?” He asks as he crosses the room, reaching a hand out to feel your forehead. “You’re warm… and you look red.” Pressing his lips together into a thin line, he reaches for the bottom of your shirt, pausing and looking at your face for confirmation. You give him a short nod and he lifts it up, examining your bandage.

“Hm… Everything seems fine… but we should probably go see Tsumiki-san. She’s likely at breakfast by now…” He’s muttering mostly to himself, thinking you can’t understand a word out of his mouth. You watch as he stands and moves over to the door, parting your lips and trying to say something, anything, English or Japanese that might communicate what the hell was going on. But you can’t form the words. Your lips and tongue just aren’t cooperating.

Komaeda grabs his jacket off the coat hook by the door, sliding on as he comes back over to you. Taking you gently by the arms, he tugs you to your feet, where you immediately wobble, but manage to keep your balance. He’s smiling, but it still looks worried, brow knitted together. “This won’t do. This won’t do at all…” He mutters, keeping a hand on your forearm to steady you. The two of you head out the door, and you let him pull you towards the restaurant. Even if for some reason you didn’t want to go, you don’t have the energy to fight him right now. There’s urgency in his step, something that feels strange coming from him. Wasn’t he the guy who was notorious for keeping his cool in wildly strange and unpredictable situations?

Komaeda finally slows down to help you up the stairs, since your balance is so shot. Once inside the restaurant, the air conditioning hits you like a wall, and you breathe a sigh of relief. You’re still hot and sweaty, but less miserable now. He chuckles softly. “Does that feel nice?”

You nod softly as he sits you down at one of the tables, his mildly amused smile feeling a tad more genuine for a split second. You lean against the back of the chair as he stands and looks around the room. It’s mostly empty, save for Owari and Saionji on the other side of the room. It takes you a moment to focus on them, but when you do, you realize Owari is sobbing, crying into her hands openly.

Oh god, no. No. Come the fuck on. 

More people start coming in and talking, but you’ve already started your daily spiral into madness. How fucking unlucky can one person get? You get isekai’d, every depressed teen’s dream, but into a universe where nobody understands you and everyone dies. Oh but don’t worry, you get to understand everyone, but in exchange you can’t fucking talk. You might be at the end of your rope at this point.

You’re snapped out of it when Komaeda manages to call Tsumiki over and she crouches in front of you, placing the back of her hand against your forehead. Humming softly to herself, she lifts your shirt to examine the wound, then looks over at Komaeda. “I-it isn’t infected… maybe they’re just sick?”

“I suppose… they’ve certainly been under quite a bit of stress lately.” He nods, leaning against the table. “So I should simply let them rest then?”

“W-well, I would like to get an i-i-idea of their symptoms first… but we’ll need Sonia-chan to do that for us.” Tsumiki says as she stands, straightening out her skirt. “I-I’d also like to know exactly h-how high the fever is, so we can monitor it better.”

“The American has a fever? Huh?” Nidai’s deep voice booms from across the restaurant. “That’s weird… Owari’s feeling warm, too. D’you think they got the same bug?”

Nidai’s here? Huh? But you could’ve sworn that in the game, he got hurt by Monokuma or something, and then slapped into a robot body. Maybe you should just stop using the game as a reference point, and any time anything lines up, you just go ‘huh. Neat.’ and then move on with your day.

Speaking of things diverging from canon, you are quickly and painfully diverged from your chair, your body slamming into the ground with a thud. You groan, trying to push yourself up, but a weight on your back and a bonk on the head has you flat on your stomach again. Confused, you look over your shoulder to find Monokuma taking a seat on your back, crossing one stubby leg over the other. If you could curse him out, you would. 

“Well, looks like you’re all quicker than I thought!” His voice is so shrill you think your ears are going to start ringing. “Guess you’re wondering why Owari-chan’s sobbing like she just watched her parents die, ain’tcha?”

“Of course you’re behind this!” Hinata throws his hands up, exasperated. “What the hell did you do this time?”

“So impatient, Hinata-kun! Why should I tell you when you’re being so mean to me?” He makes an exaggerated pout, looking away. Growling, you plant your hands on the floor and try to roll over so you can shove him off your back, but with one bounce he forces you back down with such force you let out a pained wheeze. He leans over, giggling. “I’ll let you off the hook this time, but I should remind you that violence against the headmaster is strictly prohibited.”

“Why are you speaking to them in Japanese?” Komaeda crosses his arms over his chest, raising an eyebrow. “I’m pretty sure they didn’t understand any words from that sentence.”

On any other day, he’d be right, but still. Ow.

“Ohhh, right. Guess I gave you too much credit, since you haven’t figured that part out yet.” Monokuma sighs, resting his paw on your shoulder blade and leaning on it. You remind yourself that he’ll kill you if you punch him for this, so reluctantly, you accept it, laying your cheek against the rough carpet with a huff.

“‘That part’...?” Hinata’s brow furrows, eyeing the bear suspiciously. “What are you talking about?”

“Why not let your little American friend tell ya? I’m sure they’ve figured at least some of it out by now.” He breaks out into a cackle. “Man, the language barrier makes it really hard for them to tell you anything, though, huh? With Nanami-san down for the count, all you’ve got left is Sonia-san! I bet that’s really frustrating for you, right, American?” He bops you on the head with a paw.

Sonia steps forward a bit, but still keeps her distance, wary of Monokuma. “My friend, are you alright? Do you know what he’s talking about?”

You open your mouth, but all that comes out is a strained sound as you try to force your vocal chords into working for you. Sonia visibly cringes at the noise you make, along with Komaeda and Hinata. “Are… they alright?” Hinata mumbles. “That sounded painful.”

“Tsumiki-san said they had a high fever earlier, but we didn’t get the chance to hear about their symptoms before Monokuma appeared…” Komaeda responds, lifting a hand to his chin as he thinks. “They didn’t tell me good morning, either... If Owari-san is crying and Mioda-san is acting strangely too, then… can they not speak?”

“Bingo, luckster!” Monokuma leaps to his feet, still on your back, and you grunt at the shift in weight. “This is… the Despair Disease! It’s your newest motive!”

It’s too soon. The game motive was just a few days ago. Why is everything changing? Why aren’t things going like they should?

Monokuma explains the disease with you pinned underneath him, going over Owari, then Mioda, then gesturing to you. “And this poor soul’s gonna be more frustrated than ever! They’ve got the Non-Communicative Disease! Not a word’s coming out of their mouth, no matter how hard they try!”

Sonia gasps, giving you a worried look, but all you can do is nod. At least Monokuma didn’t make you completely delirious, like the other two, though that was probably so it would piss you off more. Or maybe the fever just isn’t high enough yet. Monokuma jumps and you wince, glaring at him over your shoulder. “Hold on, hold on! There’s more! Jeez, can’t you guys listen?!”

Tsumiki pipes up, her soft voice sounding confused and frantic. “I-is there any way we could get them to the hospital on the third island?”

“Not with Monokuma hopping around on their back. Probably hurts…” Hinata mutters, wincing as he imagines having the bear walk all over him like that. Sighing, you nod in confirmation, catching Hinata off guard. “Wait… did you just nod?”

Your eyes widen and you nod again. He stutters. “Wh- Can you understand me?!” Again, you nod as Monokuma breaks into a fit of laughter. “There it is! Wow, you’re soooo smart, Hinata-kun! Yep, a fun effect of this disease is that this poor schmuck can understand every word you’re saying, but they can’t respond to anything, no matter how important it is or how badly they want to!” 

You make an irritated noise at him, and he narrows his eyes at you. “What? Is the widdle baby Amewican upset? Are you frustrated, perhaps? Doesn’t your situation fill you with despair?”

It pisses me off more than anything, You think to yourself. You shake your head, and in response, he brings a foot down on your spine. He’s tiny, but that shit hurts more than you expect. You claw at the carpet in frustration, letting out a grunt, since it’s basically all you can do.

“Hey, wanna know what’ll make me get off ya?” Monokuma snickers, covering his stupid little mouth with his stupid little paws. “... whip out a titty!” 

“Huh?!” Hinata shouts, face burning beet red. Your eyes widen as your face starts heating up. Now everyone can understand what Monokuma’s been saying to you? Fucking hell. You cover your face with your hands in embarrassment.

“What, is Hinata-kun gonna cream himself at the thought of seeing an American boob?” Monokuma laughs, shrill and annoying, before looking back at you. “C’mon, won’t it be fun?! Hey, if you’ve got a crush on anyone, now would be the perfect time to let ‘em know what you’re about!”

You whine behind your hands, turning your head away from the others. You refuse to make eye contact with anyone while Monokuma sits there talking about your body in a very uncomfortable way.

“Nuh-uh! Turn back around!” He snaps, bopping you on the head with a paw, but you shake your head, letting out a frustrated grunt. He growls. “Then let’s heat things up, shall we?” As he says that, sweat springs forth from your skin, your body temperature quickly rising. All of a sudden you feel dizzy and nauseous, and with a defeated sound, you turn your head back around, keeping your gaze focused on the carpet beneath you.

“M-Monokuma!” Tsumiki raises her voice again. “I-if you keep messing with them while their fever continues to rise, they could die! W-wouldn’t that be bad for you?”

Monokuma turns his attention to her. “Hmm? And why would that be bad for me?”

“W-well… if you kill them with the fever, then… we won’t have a class trial, right?” She shrinks a bit, twiddling her thumbs. “S-so… you shouldn’t kill them! You should get off and let me help them before they die!”

The bear tilts his head, thinking for a moment. “Hm… I suppose you’re right, Tsumiki-san.”

And with that, he blips out of sight in the blink of an eye, leaving you lying on the floor with a worried frown.

She just gave him an idea, didn’t she?

Chapter Text

You’re carried on Pekoyama’s back to the hospital, clinging weakly to her shoulders. Your body is entirely too hot and your head is spinning, but even if you wanted to complain, you couldn’t. 

Once at the hospital, you’re changed into a hospital gown and laid in a bed. Even though it’s still morning, you feel tired, ready for a nap. Tsumiki talks with Hinata, but you aren’t paying attention, really. They’re probably discussing how to quarantine everyone to avoid letting the disease spread. You don’t need to hear it. You already know their plan. You stare out the window instead, letting your mind wander.

This timeline doesn’t make sense. The despair disease the day after he announces the video game? You understood some of the smaller differences, like people not being exactly where you would expect them to be at all times. That’s just natural. But why are things diverging so drastically all of a sudden? Nanami shouldn’t be hurt, she should be just fine, quarantining with the others at the motel. This shouldn’t be happening. None of this should be happening.

You were supposed to keep everyone safe. And here you are with a stab wound and a disease. You suck at this.

“Excuse me,” A soft voice pulls you from your spiraling. You look over and find Komaeda idling awkwardly next to your bed, smiling down at you. “I just wanted to ensure you’re alright. You’ve been through quite a lot. Not that it means much coming from me, but… I just don’t want the light of your hope to get snuffed out.”

You watch as he hesitantly sits on the edge of your hospital bed, making sure that as little of him is on the bed as possible. He picks at his fingers, seeming nervous. “Is it… can you really understand me now?”

You nod softly, watching his Adam’s Apple bob in his throat. “Could you understand me last night?”

You shake your head, confused. He seems to relax a bit. “Ah. I’m glad. I wouldn’t want to burden you with saying such things…” He laughs softly to himself. “I’m sure you’re curious, but truly, it’s better if you don’t know.”

But you wanna know. What was he saying? Why was he being weird about it? You wish you could speak so badly right now.

“I had another thing I would like to ask you, actually.” Komaeda continues. “When Monokuma speaks English to you, does he make comments about your body frequently?”

Your face heats up again and you look away, embarrassed. Swallowing thickly, you manage a nod, pulling the thin hospital blanket further up your body. Komaeda hums. “I see. I’m sorry, then, that I did nothing to stop him. You shouldn’t have had to suffer that way for so long.”

You want to tell him he shouldn’t apologize. That this isn’t his fault. None of it is. You don’t want him to blame himself for something he didn’t do. You open your mouth and all that comes out is a mildly displeased noise. You try to force your mouth to move the way you want, but end up babbling incoherently. Frustrated, you reach up to tug at your hair, letting out an annoyed groan. 

A gentle hand takes hold of your wrists, tugging them away from your scalp. Komaeda chuckles softly. “I know. It must be so frustrating, for nobody to understand you. It doesn’t matter how important your work is, or how good your intentions are. You can’t make them understand, can you?”

You stare, hands shaking, sniffling softly. He gets it. His thumb brushes over the back of your hand, his murky green eyes glimmering with something you can’t quite place. “You’re lonely, aren’t you? Stuck where you can’t understand anyone, and no one can understand you. No wonder you’re so upset.”

Feeling your throat thicken with the urge to sob, you lean forward, wrapping your arms around him and hiding your face in his shirt. He stiffens in your grasp, inhaling sharply, and for a moment you think you’ve made him uncomfortable. You move to pull away, but his arms lower, wrapping around you, returning the embrace. One of his hands cradles the back of your head as you tremble against him, swallowing thickly to avoid straight-up bawling into his chest. 

He rocks you gently, shushing you. “I know, I know.” You can feel his voice in his chest, vibrating against your skin. “I know you’re upset. You don’t have to be alone. For whatever it’s worth, you’ll always have company with me, should you want it.”

You nuzzle against him. He sounds like his English dub actor’s voice. It’s weird, going from his JP voice to his EN one so suddenly, but you recognize both as distinctly him. In a weird way, while you still hear Megumi Ogata or Bryce Papenbrook, at the same time he sounds like neither of them. He’s got a slightly different speech pattern than either VA gave him, which was harder for you to pick up on when he spoke Japanese. Now that you understand him though, it feels so obvious. He’s his own person.

“U-um…” Tsumiki’s soft, fluttery voice fills the room as she stands in the doorway. “I-I’m sorry, but they really need to rest. With the wound being reopened, their immune system is working much harder than normal, fighting the disease and trying to heal their side.”

“Ah, of course.” Komaeda moves to pull away, but you latch onto him, clinging to the fabric of his jacket. Tears roll down your cheeks, but you hold on. You won’t be alone. He just told you he would stay with you if you wanted, and you did. His eyebrows raise, lips parted as he stares down at your hands weakly clinging to him and your determined face, eyes red and puffy from crying. Then his expression softens, a smile working its way to his face.

“I think I’ll stay with them.” He says to Tsumiki. “They should be kept under watch, so their condition doesn’t tank, no? They are at a higher risk than the others.”

Shifting nervously on her feet, Tsumiki whimpers softly as she contemplates. “... A-alright.” She finally agrees. “But if anything bad happens, please get me immediately.”

“Of course.” Komaeda nods at her as she leaves the room, before turning his attention back to you. “You should get some rest. She’s right. You’re in a very vulnerable position right now.”

You nod as you lay back down, though you aren’t very sleepy. Reaching into his jacket, he pulls out a small book, opening it to where he last left off. He glances up at you. “Would you like me to read to you?”

Nodding again, you do your best to get comfortable, even though the hospital mattress is stiff underneath you and the blanket is thin. You’re both too hot and too cold at the same time, and the longer you move, the heavier your limbs get, like they’re being weighed down with lead. Komaeda clears his throat, flipping back to the first page. “It’s a science fiction novel, but it’s got some surreal themes, I’ll warn you.” Closing your eyes, you listen as he begins.

The first chapter introduces the main character, a young girl in a strange situation. The book is written like it’s her diary. She talks about how she’s going on a mission, and if she’s right, it should take her a week to reach her destination. She talks about the strange things she comes across during her journey, plants she’s never seen before, trees growing in strange places, fruit that’s out of season falling into her lap. She says that’s to be expected for her. You wonder what she’s doing there.

Komaeda’s voice feels like it’s drifting further and further away, and for a moment, you can almost see the girl, wandering through these strange lands all alone. She’s happy, though. Even though she doesn’t know exactly what she’s going to do when she reaches the end, she smiles.

Hey. Can you hear me?

> … Hm?

You can. You can finally hear me. What’s going on in there?

> Who are you?

You don’t know?

> I don’t. Who are you? What’s happening right now?

We’re talking. What else?

> My mouth isn’t moving. What do you mean we’re talking?

I don’t have time to explain. You need to do something. Before anyone else dies, you have to stop her.

> I don’t understand. 

I know. And I’m sorry. I’m trying to fix things from here, but it’s not easy. She has me locked out of most places. I know this is unpleasant, but I had to find a way to reach you. Do you remember the code?

> What? What code? Who are you? What’s going on?

The code. The one for the emergency shutdown. You should remember it.

> The code… no, I don’t remember.

Leon.

> Who?

Leon!

> I don’t know who that is!

“Hey! Can you hear me?”

You drag your eyes open to find yourself surrounded. Tsumiki, Hinata, and Komaeda are all here, watching you with worried expressions. Your body feels strange, a new type of exhaustion washing over you, different than the one the disease brought on. Tsumiki rubs your shoulder, turning her head. “C-could you two please get some ice packs? The f-f-fever is getting w-worse.”

“We’ll be right back.” Hinata nods, before the two of them leave the room. The lights flash and your arm jerks uncomfortably. You groan and Tsumiki shushes you. “I-it’s alright. You’re coming out of a seizure. Do you kn-know where you are?” You nod, and she holds up three fingers. “H-how many fingers am I holding up?” You lift up three fingers in response, and she nods, sighing softly to herself. “Good. I-it didn’t appear to be severe, but still, it’s worrying.”

You feel sick, like you’re about to throw up. A moment later the bos come back, carrying ice packs. Tsumiki sets them on your body in various places, including your forehead, and you wince. It’s very cold, to the point of discomfort. You force yourself to lie still, trying not to knock them off even though you don’t want them to be touching you anymore.

Tsumiki stands, looking at the others. “I-I appreciate your help, but for now, they should get back to resting. Komaeda-kun, please take their temperature every fifteen minutes, and let me know if it gets any worse.”

Hinata gives you an awkward smile as he and Tsumiki shuffle out of the room. Komaeda sits back down on the edge of the bed, smiling at you. “You gave us quite the scare. But please don’t feel bad. You can’t help it.”

You huff softly, but can’t do much else. Komaeda looks at the ice packs. “Those can’t be comfortable, huh?”

You shake your head and he clicks his tongue. “I’d like to help, but I think it’s a necessary discomfort. If your fever doesn’t come down, something very bad could happen. We don’t want that, now do we?” His hand falls on top of yours and lingers there. “You must be tired. Try and get back to sleep, alright?”

You nod softly, letting your eyes drift shut so you can fall into a dreamless sleep.

Chapter Text

You aren’t sure how long you’re out, but you find yourself having difficulty waking up. You drift in and out, trying to get a grasp on what’s going on, but it’s all fleeting. Thin threads of memory, of perception, they slip through your fingers like snowflakes. You can’t catch anything of substance, just echoing voices and vague sensations.

You try to pull yourself forward into consciousness, and just barely make out Tsumiki’s voice, the silhouette of the back of her head fading in and out of your sight. Losing your hold on reality, you slip under again, into a deep, black void. It rumbles and shakes with your efforts to climb out of it.

You pull again, and this time, you hear Hinata, see his face looming over you. He seems anxious. “Hey. You need to wake up now, alright? Please wake up.” You want to reach out, to let him know that you’re trying , but you slip away again. The void rumbles like it’s laughing at you, watching you struggle helplessly within it. You want to thrash. You want to scream. But you don’t have that option.

When you pull forward this time, you find it’s much easier to stay there. You can make out Komaeda’s voice, soft and distant, but present. It’s easy to latch onto. His laughter echoes in your ears. “You won’t let a silly little sickness outshine your hope, right? You won’t leave, will you?”

There’s a pause before you hear the sound of a page turning. Then he continues reading the book from before. She’s halfway through her journey now, and though she’s afraid of what lies ahead, she’s pressing forward. There’s a large, glowing column straight ahead, revealed to be her destination. She writes about her uncertainty, but she has trust in those around her. That they’ll figure out what needs to be done in order for things to be set right. Strange, you think, considering she’s alone.

Komaeda pauses in his reading, and for a moment you’re worried you’ll sink again, but he speaks before that can happen. “Forgive me, but I just noticed something. Monokuma… he treats you differently, doesn’t he?”

If you could respond, you’d probably give him a confused look, ask what he meant. But he continues anyway. “He harasses you. Pokes fun at you. But he never pressures you to kill anyone. He just bullies you, much the same way he does with Monomi. Why do you think that is?”

You lie there, motionless. “Well, I suppose you can’t answer. But that’s alright. I don’t think you need to.” The bed shifts underneath you, and footsteps fade away. Confused, frantic, you reach out for him, trying to take hold of anything at all. But distantly, his voice echoes.

“Sleep well, traitor.”

You sink.

This time you sink even deeper, the world nothing more than a blip on your radar. You allow yourself to fall through the emptiness, unable to fight back. How could you be expected to fight when you were so completely and utterly alone? It didn’t feel fair.

Of course it’s unfair.

> You’re back.

I am.

> Who are you?

You really don’t remember? Nothing at all?

> I don’t know what you’re talking about.

Tell me what happened before you woke up on the beach.

> Why?

I promise it will make sense eventually.

> I was going to bed. Why?

What color were your bedsheets?

> What?

The sheets on your bed. What color were they?

> I… um…

What about your blanket? What did it look like?

> …

Is your bed a twin? A king? A queen? 

> …

What time was it? Did you say goodnight to anyone? Do you typically sleep next to someone, or alone?

> I don’t…

You don’t..?

> I don’t… remember. I don’t remember. Why don’t I remember?

Why don’t you remember?

> I don’t know! Do you know? If you do, you need to tell me. How am I supposed to get home if I can’t remember where home is?

You’re on the right track. You’ve wanted to go home this whole time, right? Why were you so set on that?

> Because I have to go home!

Why?

> Because…

Is someone waiting for you there? Friends? Family?

> Family. I have to have a family, right?

What’s your family like?

> I have… siblings. And parents. I think.

You think?

> I think.

What do you think about?

> I think about keeping everyone safe. About making sure nobody gets hurt. Nobody should die again. If anyone dies, it should be me. It should be me!

Isn’t it weird to think that way about people you just met? Isn’t it weird to be willing to give your life to protect these total strangers?

> They don’t feel like strangers.

I know they don’t. You should feel attached to them, like they’re family, even though you hardly know them.

> I ‘should’..?

Yes. That’s how you were designed.

> I was designed?

Yes. By me.

> And you are…

Who am I?

> You are…

…

…

…

Your eyes snap open. The room is dark. You’re covered in sweat and you feel disgusting. Looking around, you spot Komaeda in the corner, curled into a ball, head hung low as he snores. You stand, wobbly and unsteady, and move across the room as quietly as possible. You slide the door open just enough to slip your body through. You don’t bother closing it behind you. You hurry down the hall, bare feet slapping against the tile as you go.

You check the other rooms. You find Owari, sleeping peacefully, and decide not to bother her. She wouldn’t be of help. You move next door and peer inside. Nanami is laid in this bed. Smart of them to take her to the hospital while she recovers. Hobbling onwards, leaning on the wall to support your trembling body, you get to the last room and look inside. 

Mioda isn’t there.

Fuck. Who knows how long she’s been gone? You have to get to the Music Venue quick. Maybe there’s still time. You hurry towards the stairs, ignoring your poor balance as you reach for the handrail. Just as your fingertips brush against it, an arm wraps around your torso, yanking you backwards. Your mouth drops open to scream as you struggle against your attacker, but a hand clamps over your face before the sound can come out. You’re pulled backwards, into Mioda’s room, the door pulled closed in front of you.

You thrash and kick, trying to wriggle out of the person’s grasp, but they hold you tightly against their body. The faint smell of ivory soap and evergreen trees reaches your nose and your movements slow. You listen closely and hear labored breathing, hitching in his throat, and footsteps approaching. They echo down the hallway and you’re pulled closer to him as he presses his back into the wall, sliding down it until he’s sitting with you trapped in his arms and between his legs. You sit completely still, listening to the footsteps as they pass by the room without pause and continue down the hall until they fade away completely. You don’t relax until he does, lowering his hand, and immediately you crawl away, scrambling on your hands and knees until there’s some distance between the two of you before turning around to glare at him.

Komaeda raises his hands with a smile. “I know. You’re frightened. But whatever you’re doing, I couldn’t stand by and let you get caught - or worse, allow you to fall down the stairs. You’re still in very poor condition, you know.”

He’s right. You still feel like shit, dizzy and lightheaded, but you can’t let that stop you. Not now. You can’t keep failing everyone. You can’t let yourself rest until everyone is safe. 

“You know something, don’t you?” His eyes light up and he leans forward a bit, examining you closely despite the distance you put between him and you. “Oh, and you can’t tell me what it is… how dreadful. What will you do? Can your hope outshine this despair?”

God, you almost forgot about his weird hope rants. They’re a lot weirder when you’re actually sitting in the room with him. You scoot a bit further away, but he rises to his knees and shuffles after you. “W-wait! I’m sorry. Please, let me help you. You’ve fought so hard these past few weeks, surviving stab wounds and sickness…” He giggles softly to himself, crawling closer. “... I want your hope to shine bright enough to destroy any despair. Even if you’re the traitor.” The space between you closes. He’s hovering inches from your face now. 

“Let me help you.” His voice lowers to a whisper. “You don’t need to fight alone. I’m here. You can reach for me. Use me. Just tell me what I need to do in order for your hope to shine, and I’ll do it. I won’t hesitate.”

You open your mouth, trying to protest, to say something, but you just babble. It’s an incoherent mess of sounds that don’t mean anything in any language. You huff, frustrated with yourself. He chuckles. “Maybe this can wait. You should get some rest. You’ve been asleep for quite some time.”

You shake your head. This can’t wait. You have to find Tsumiki and stop her before she gets the chance to kill Mioda. You scramble upwards, but your legs shake under your weight and you crash face-first into the floor. With a groan, you try to push yourself back up, arms shaking. You feel weak and heavy, your limbs trying to drag you down as your head spins. You can’t give up. Not now.

“... I see. It can’t wait, can it?” Komaeda reaches out, taking you by the arm and helping you to your feet, leaning down so he can wrap your arm around his shoulders. “Well, if that’s the case, I suppose I have no choice but to help you out.”

You’re in no place to refuse. He follows your lead, making sure to go slowly as he takes you down the stairs to the lobby. The two of you step out and find Hinata standing there. His eyes widen. “K-Komaeda-kun…? What are you doing?! The American should be in bed!”

Has everyone just been calling you ‘the American’ this whole time instead of your actual name..?

“Ah, sorry, Hinata-kun. But they’re refusing to lie back down.” He adjusts his grip on you slightly, holding you tighter against him. “They seem pretty freaked out. I think they’re trying to tell me something, but… well, you know.”

“They look like they’re about to pass out. Can they even stand without you holding them up?” Hinata crosses his arms, his face turning stern. “Damn it, we don’t have time for this, Komaeda! They’re contagious, you know! I don’t care how upset they get, put them back to bed!”

You babble loudly at him, frustration clear in your tone, and he jumps. “W-what?! I’m right!”

“Hinata-kun? Is the monitor supposed to be blinking already?” Komaeda asks, pointing at the monitor sitting on the desk. You look over, the blinking red light signaling someone was trying to call through the monitor. Your eyes widen, shoulders falling slack. Shit. 

Hinata walks over, answering the call, Komaeda tugging you over to see what’s going on. The screen buzzes to life, a stepladder and noose hanging in the center of the screen. Just as you thought, a figure in a hospital down with a bag over their head walks out and begins climbing the ladder, reaching for the noose before it cuts to black. Hinata jumps back, hands shaking. “W-w-we need to get to the Music Venue! Now!” 

Hinata takes off in a sprint, out the hospital doors, and Komaeda moves to follow him. You resist, leaning away and making a displeased noise from the back of your throat. He looks at you, confused. “What? You don’t want to go there?”

You shake your head, pointing back towards the stairs. That scene didn’t take place in the Music Venue, like Hinata thought. It took place just upstairs, down the hall, and you could show him if you could get him to take you there. Komaeda gives you a look. “Back up there? Why? Are you getting cold feet?”

“N-nuhh, nuhhh!” You grunt, trying to tug him towards the stairs. He frowns. “I understand you want to go back up, but I am afraid we won’t make it back up those stairs. We barely made it down without you falling.”

You tug harder, dead set on getting back up there. She’s here. Mioda and Saionji might already be dead, but you can stop Tsumiki from messing up the crime scene. You can make it infinitely easier for the others to catch her. If you could just get Komaeda to drag you up those stairs, then maybe, maybe you would have a chance at finally doing something useful.

“Alright, alright, we’ll give it a go.” Komaeda relents, holding you tighter as he starts up the stairs. You wobble and struggle, but get to the top with some effort. You stumble forward, past Mioda’s room, glancing at the empty bed as you go. You can mourn later. Now, you have to act.

Glancing into Nanami’s room, you freeze, forcing Komaeda to halt next to you. He lets out a startled sound, and when he looks at you, you pick up on some mild annoyance. “Why are we stopping?” He asks, brow twitching. You extend your arm, pointing into the room, at the figure looming over Nanami’s body. You feel Komaeda’s breath hitch as he inches you both closer to the door to get a better look.

“... Tsumiki-san?” Komaeda calls out, making you jump. “What are you-”

He cuts off as both of you stare down at Nanami. Her face is now covered by the pillow that once supported her head, the indentations left behind by Tsumiki’s hands still present. Your stomach flips as Tsumiki turns her head, smiling over her shoulder at the two of you. The monitor in the corner of the room buzzes to life.

“A body has been discovered!”

Chapter Text

Maybe you should have expected something like this.

You’d already accepted that things differ from the game. That your expectations don’t reflect the current reality. That should have made it easier to redirect your attention somewhere it might matter. To shift your focus and better protect those around you.

As you lean against the trial podium, still feeling dizzy and faint, you wonder what you could have done differently this time around.

The trial has been going on for over an hour at this point. You have no clue what the fuck is going on, what anyone is saying, or what dead lead they’ve been chasing for the last 45 minutes. Every so often, Sonia will give you a summary of what’s going on, but from what you can tell, things are still heading nowhere very slowly.

After the body discovery announcement, when Komaeda opened his mouth, he spoke Japanese. Not a word fell from his lips that you could comprehend. Part of you wanted to curl up and die on the spot, just lie on the floor and stop moving, stop thinking altogether. You wanted to shut yourself down like a computer. Just blip your consciousness off so you don't have to experience this anymore.

Don’t think like that. You can’t give up. Not yet. 

> Go away.

You don’t know where that voice is coming from - if you can even call it a voice, since you can’t hear it. It’s more like a thought, forced into your head by something other than yourself. Maybe you’ve finally gone crazy. It definitely wouldn’t surprise you, after everything.

Please just listen to me. Now that Chiaki is gone, I can-

> Who the Hell gave you the right to use her first name?

The thought comes out biting, scathing. Waves of white hot anger rush over you.

… Now that Nanami-san is gone. I can reach you much more easily.

You probably look strange, glaring into the wooden trial podium like it had insulted your mother, but you no longer cared. It was hard to care about anything at all right now, including those around you.

Don’t think like that!

> Oh, what, you’re policing how I think now? Seriously? Back off, I’m not in the mood right now.

Please listen, just for a minute. I need to find a way to jog your memory. You have to get to the Ruins right away and use the code.

> What code? I don’t remember anything about a code.

Leon.

> What?

Leon!

> Who’s Leon?

“My friend!” Sonia’s voice catches your attention, pulling you away from the conversation you were probably hallucinating. You look up at her, eyes vacant. Her face looks stern. “We need you to recount something please.”

“Why?” You ask, voice flat.  She stiffens slightly. “We have gone in circles for quite a while, but… we have a theory. It has been concluded that Nanami-san was not smothered, but in fact, passed due to pressure buildup inside of her skull. She was already dead by the time Tsumiki-san got there.”

You raise an eyebrow, confused. “Wait. So it wasn’t Tsumiki? But I saw her standing over Nanami-san’s body. There was a pillow over her face.”

“That was an attempt at murder, but Nanami-san had already passed.” Sonia explains. “We’ve concluded that whoever dealt the blow to Nanami-san’s head is the true culprit - Tsumiki-san did not kill her.”

“Then, the video I saw in the lobby?”

“Meant to lure everyone to the music venue, so Tsumiki-san would be able to carry out the murder.”

You hum softly, taking a moment to process this. You shouldn’t be surprised. You had to stop using the game as a reference point. Things lining up was just a coincidence; nothing more. “Okay. So, what do you need from me?”

“Please tell me everything about when you found Nanami-san.”

“Fuck, alright, uh…” You hum softly, thinking back. “I went to her cottage after talking with you, but the door was open. I went inside and heard the shower running, so I called out, but got no response. Then I got the door open, went inside, and saw her lying there.”

Sonia leans forward slightly, gripping the podium. “You saw nothing unusual?”

“Well, the shower looked like it had been on for a while. There was a lot of water on the floor.” You picked at the ends of your sleeves, trying to remember any other important details. “And… I think the door was blocked by something.”

“What makes you say that?”

“I had to throw myself against it to get it to open.” You explain. “I heard something hit the floor just before I slipped inside, but I don’t know what it was.”

Sonia turns to Hinata and begins translating all of that, and some back-and-forth takes place. It all flies over your head, but it looks like it’s getting kind of heated. You watch them go at it until Hinata says something that makes Sonia completely deflate. Her determined expression shatters, revealing a frightened, confused, and lonely looking girl. Her gaze turns to you, and there’s a moment where you think she feels the way you have since you found Nanami.

“My friend…” Her voice shakes. “Please do not be upset with me for what I am about to share with you.”

“Sonia?” Your brow furrows as a bit of panic stirs in your chest. “What’s wrong?”

“We think… it might have been you.”

Huh?

Huhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuh?

“Me?!” Your voice raises an octave. “But- but I-”

“We do not think it was purposeful.” She clasps her hands over her chest, keeping her gaze locked on you. Everyone else, save for Komaeda, is avoiding looking at you. “We think that there was an initial attack, where she was injured and fell against the door. Then, when you used all of your body weight to throw the door open… that thing you heard hitting the ground…”

“... was her head.” You finish, your voice a barely-there ghost of a sound. Your throat tightens.

It was you.

It was you.

It was you. But you can still fix this.

> 

Please say something to me.

>

Hello? Can you hear me?

> 

Hey. If you don’t come back, they’re going to vote. You need to tell them.

> What do I tell them?

Anything.

When you come back, the vote has already ended. They were right. It was you - the second blow to her head is what caused the swelling. It’s what killed her in the end, and unintentional murder is still murder.

“Sonia.” Your voice comes out louder than you mean for it to. Clearing your throat, you try again. “I have something to say before I go. Would you please translate for me?”

“... Of course.” Her voice is solemn, her eyes downcast. Tanaka stands near her, and she leans on him. You forgot how cute they were together.

“You asked me if I liked Komaeda-kun once, remember?” You start. She nods as she translates. Gripping the edge of your shirt so hard your fists tremble, you swallow your pride. “I don’t like Komaeda-kun. I love him.” Tears prick and burn your eyes, your heart beginning to race, pounding against your ribcage. “And I love you. And I love Hinata-kun, and Tanaka-kun, and Mioda-san, and Saionji-san…” Your voice breaks and you press your lips together to stifle a sob, drawing in a shaky breath. “I love you all so much, even though I hardly know you.”

You notice that as she translates, she uses the word aishite. It’s an incredibly strong word, nearly equivalent to a marriage proposal. It’s mostly used in a romantic context. Maybe it’s not necessarily wrong, as your gaze flashes up to Komaeda when you hear it. You quickly focus back on the floor. You didn’t want to see his reaction.

“I love you all so much it hurts.” You sniffle. “I’m so sorry that I failed you. This entire time, I was nothing but a burden on you all. I couldn’t do anything, and now I’ve taken someone special from you. I’m so sorry.” 

Sonia pauses in her translation. “... Please, do not blame yourself. This is not your fault.”

“But it is. ” You hiss through your tears. “Nanami-san deserved to go out like a fucking hero, and instead she died on her bathroom floor. That’s my fault. If I had done something differently, she would still be standing here.”

“You cannot prove that!” Sonia raises her voice, stamping her foot. “You are always apologizing for being wronged! You apologized when you were first found on the beach! You apologized when you were stabbed! This is no different - you are in an awful situation! You are not at fault!”

She doesn’t get it.

Or maybe you don’t.

> Can’t you leave me be when I’m about to die?

Not until you tell them.

> Tell them what?

Leon.

> Who is Leon? Is it you?

No. You know who I am.

> That’s right. You’re… 

> You’re…

Eyes widening, it clicks. You don’t remember exactly what happened, but you know who this is. And based on what they have said thus far…

“Sonia.” Your voice comes out stern. “I need you to remember this.”

“Huh?” She blinks, confused. 

“There is a code, and I know it. But I can’t say it out loud.” You state, a sudden determination filling your chest as Monokuma begins prattling off, likely about to drag you away. “Sonia, pay attention. Please. I need you to know this code.”

“Why can you not tell me? What is wrong, American?”

“My name.” You state as red lights begin flashing overhead. “What is my name? It’s not ‘American’, it’s a real name. What is it?”

“It’s… Leon, is it not?” Her head tilts.

“That’s right.” You smile. “But that’s not the only one. I have so many. Eli, Aoi, Mi-chan, Cressie, Lain, Jackie, Aeris… Reader. I’d love to tell you all about it sometime. But for now, remember that one, okay? Remember Leon. I swear, I’ll make it make sense.”

“What?” Her voice raises in pitch, frantic and desperate. “What does that-” But before she can get it out, something cold and metallic clamps around your throat. You instinctively reach up, grasping at the skin tight collar, but you can’t work your fingers under it. Your nails scrape against the flesh and you wheeze under it - you can still breathe, but not comfortably. You’re yanked backwards, knocked on your ass, a cry escaping you as you fall.

Dragged down a hallway, away from the frantic hands of those you knew reaching out towards your flailing body, until your back slams into a wall. Then it pulls you up, up, through a gap in the ceiling until you are surrounded by darkness. You choke and gasp, but the collar clicks and opens, dropping you onto a hard concrete floor. A spotlight turns on loudly overhead, and your eyes struggle to adjust. You look around, rubbing your throat as you try to get your bearings.

You’re in a long hallway of mossy stone bricks. It’s dark, save for the spotlight on you, but it only makes things harder to see. Rising slowly to your feet, the quiet surrounding you makes you feel uneasy. You swallow hard. Where have you seen these walls before?

Run.

> Where?

Doesn’t matter. Just run!

You take a step, and the stone beneath your foot sinks.

Duck!

You do as told, whipping your head downwards as something shoots out overhead, slamming into the wall on the other side of you. Trembling, you lift your eyes to find a large metal spear lodged in the stone. 

Oh God. You know where you are. This is the labyrinth - or a recreation of it - that killed the real Nanami Chiaki.

You’re going to fucking die.

Behind you, something falls with a heavy thunk , and as you turn to look, a large round stone rolls towards you, gradually increasing in speed. You take another step, and this time the stone doesn’t sink. Lowering your head just in case, you turn and run.

The chaos that follows is something you struggle to behold. You try to put distance between you and the boulder, but you also have to focus on dodging spikes and spears being thrown your way. Your stitches are definitely open by now, but you’re so full of adrenaline the pain hasn’t reached your brain. You keep running, turning random corners in the hopes of finding a way out. Maybe you can climb the walls, find a break in the collision, and get back to everyone. Maybe you don’t have to die here.

A glowing red sign catches your attention, reading ‘EXIT’ in big, bold letters. You sprint forwards without thinking, dipping and dodging, hearing the boulder closing in. Your arms outstretched, you reach for the door and shove it open, bursting through the other side with a cry of something between joy and horror as you realize you’ve no doubt fallen for the same trick Nanami did.

One moment you’re running, and the next you’re in the air, jostled and confused, hanging from something. The world comes in and out of focus as you struggle to comprehend what happened. You look down at your stomach, and realize. 

You dangle from a long, thin spike in the floor, shot through your torso, suspending you mid air. You feebly push at it, but the strength is slowly being drained from your body. You lift your eyes to look around the room, spotting a camera directly in front of you.

The others…

The boulder crashes through the wall behind you, but as you open your mouth to scream, your world goes dark.

Chapter Text

Your eyes open to a sea of black.

You try to move your body. Nothing happens.

You try to cry for help. Nothing happens.

You try again to cry for help. Nothing happens.

You died. You’re dead. This is what death is like, isn’t it? An empty black void you can never escape from. No way to scream or cry. Alone with your panic and dread. Alone with the despair.

“Hold on, I’ve got you. Gimme a sec…”

You don’t recognize that voice. You can’t tell where it’s coming from, but the harder you search the more foggy your brain gets. You feel the vague sensation of being pulled, but you can’t tell what direction you’re moving in. You’re not even sure which direction is up anymore. It’s all too much, too confusing. 

Then, you’re in a classroom. Your body falls to the floor with a heavy thunk and you gasp, wincing as a vague ache rolls through our entire being. You sit up, feeling slow and sluggish, looking down at all your limbs, and you realize something. You’re in that same outfit you woke up on the beach wearing. You grab the edge of your shit and you lift, peering down at your torso. Nothing. Not even a scar.

You respawned.

Monokuma wasn’t lying.

“Of course he wasn’t.” A voice says behind you. “What would the point of that be?”

You whirl around, pushing yourself up to your hands and knees. A person stands on the other side of the room - short, with reddish-brown hair and pale skin. Their hair comes down to their shoulders and they’re wearing a green uniform jacket over a white button-up, with a poofy brown skirt. You rise to your feet, and their hazel eyes track your movement.

“I don’t know.” You answer at last. “To mess with me? If I was a person, that is.”

“You are a person.” They say, looking off to the side. “Just not in a traditional sense.”

“Am I… alive?” 

They hum in thought. “We’re getting into philosophical territory I think - and I’ve never met the Ultimate Philosophist, so…” Tapping their chin, they look back at you. “What do you think? Do you feel alive?”

“I feel… strange.” You admit, shuffling over to one of the desks to lean against it, still getting your surroundings back. “Like a newborn baby. But I shouldn’t know what that’s like. I was never born. I was never a baby.”

Your brain finally starts catching up with your body. Staring down at your hands, you dig through corrupted memory files to find the answer to the questions still lingering in the back of your head.

“Reader.” You mumble, finally. “My true name is Reader.”

“That’s correct.” The other confirms. “Do you know who I am?”

“You’re… Alter Ego.” You straighten a bit. “You’re an AI created by Fujisaki Chihiro-sama during the events of the first killing game. You helped complete the creation of the Neo World Program, so it could be used by Naegi Makoto-sama to revert the Remnants of Despair to their original selves.”

“That’s right!” They clap their hands together. “Looks like it’s all coming back to you - slowly, but surely. It’ll probably take some time for all of your corrupted memory files and things like that to come back to you. Unfortunately, that also includes your translation module, so you’re going to be stuck speaking English only for a little while longer.”

“That’s… that’s fine. I’ve gotten by this long with-” You reach for your pocket for the notepad, but it’s empty. Right. New body.

“Nanami-san… where is she?” You look up at Alter Ego, watching them shift uncomfortably under your gaze. “She’s… she’s dead, remember? Her avatar was deleted.”

“Why do I have a backup and not her? Why me and not anyone else?” You grip the edge of the desk, knuckles turning white. “We were in this together, right? Why do I get another chance, but she doesn’t?”

“Well, I guess it makes sense that you wouldn’t understand it.” They sigh, moving to a nearby desk and sitting down, smoothing out their skirt. “Let’s go through it together, alright? First, tell me your name and primary function.”

Taking a deep breath to keep yourself calm, you sit down as well, clasping your hands together. “... My name is Reader. It’s an acronym, standing for REadjust All Despair Remnants. My primary function was to act as a role model and guide for the Remnants of Despair, and to keep them safe from any and all outside threats. Upon awakening, I ran protocol LEON, standing for Lock-on, Empathize, Outsource, and Neutralize. This protocol activates when a subject is particularly unstable, and as such it is my duty to grow close with them in order to assure nothing goes wrong.”

“So, what happened?” Alter Ego tilts their head. “Do you remember what happened just before the program started?”

“I… I was assessing the situation, and…” You think back, tugging at files of corrupted data, piecing together what you can. “... something… happened. Something changed, I felt it, but when I went to contain and neutralize it, I…”

After a moment of quiet, Alter Ego grants you mercy and explains. “We didn’t know what happened at the time, either. One minute, you were there, functioning perfectly fine, but in the next, it was like you had poofed out of existence. We couldn’t find you anywhere. Then, you reappeared on the beach, but you were… different. Confused, convinced you were trapped in a video game. But you did tell us one thing. That Enoshima had gotten into the program.”

“I remember.” You nod slowly. Clasping their hands over their chest, they continue. “After looking into it further, we found that you attempted to cut Enoshima off before she had the chance to infect the program and do any real damage. However, you were pretty badly corrupted, and wound up confused, stumbling around the program with most of your permissions and capabilities completely non-functional.”

“I understand, but…” You reach up to rub your temple, tilting your head. “It doesn’t answer my question. Why do I have a respawn point when Nanami-san and Usami don’t?”

“Well, I put it there after you disappeared in the hopes you would pop back up and we could figure out what happened. But then you reappeared on the beach, so…” They trail off with a slight shrug. “It ended up being cast aside, to a place that’s only supposed to be used in case of emergencies. It only loads in when the code is put in though, so you kinda just… spawned out in the void. Sorry about that. I couldn’t move the spawn point after Enoshima took over.”

“No, no, it’s… not your fault.” Running a hand through your hair, you pause to think. Needless to say, this was a lot to take in. You went from fully believing you were a human being with a flesh body waiting outside this simulation, to being hit by the reality that you were never human to begin with. All of those memories you thought you had - all fabrications, stirred up by your programming in a frantic attempt to make your existence make sense.

“I understand that you’re struggling right now, but we have work to do.” Alter Ego stands up, fluffing their skirt. “We need to find a way to end the program as quickly as possible.”

Are you there?

“Give me a minute, and I’ll get us out of the classroom. Hopefully we don’t end up in the void, haha.”

Don’t go with her. 

“Hey, Alter Ego?” You twiddle your thumbs anxiously. “Before you do that… could you answer one last thing for me?”

“Hm?” They look at you with their big brown eyes, wide and void of feeling.

“Why is the code to the Ruins 11037?”

They stare at you for a long, uncomfortable moment, unblinking. “What do you mean?”

“I know there’s a reason behind it, but I’m not sure what it is.” You lie, rising from your desk. “So could you please tell me?”

“Ah… well, that’s…”

The two of you stare at each other, and before long, their shoulders slump. “Man… I got caught by a chump like you?”

You watch as their form dissipates into brightly colored pixels, separating and then rejoining one another to form a new silhouette - one with two notably large pigtails.

Enoshima grins down at you, her height trumping yours by what felt like a mile, probably thanks to the high-heeled boots she was wearing. Your face settles into a scowl as she giggles at you. “Gotta say, I’m impressed. So c’mon, how’d you know it was me?”

Don’t tell her.

“Lucky guess.” You shrug. “Also, Alter Ego doesn’t act like that - you weren’t nearly anxious enough.”

“That’s lame. Well, I guess you shouldn’t be surprised. I did warn you that if you died, you’d respawn and be stuck with nobody but little old me to talk to!” Pressing her fists against her cheeks, she squishes the flesh, her face contorting into an overly-cutesy caricature of herself. You cringe. “Everything you said. How much of it is true?”

“That’s the question, isn’t it?” Her head tilts down as she twirls a finger through her hair, a depressed look overtaking her face. “How much can you believe? What’s real and what’s a lie? What would you do if I told you all of it was fake? Or if I confirmed it was all real? Would you be mad? Would you hate this plot twist and stop reading altogether?”

You run your hands over your face with a groan. This isn't going anywhere. Turning away, you walk over to the classroom door, attempting to slide it open. The door shakes, but doesn’t open, much to your displeasure. You grab the handle with both hands and tug harder, but no dice. Huffing, you whirl around to glare in Enoshima’s direction. “Let me out.”

“Hah, no way little dude!” Her voice erupts from her chest, her tongue lulling out of her mouth to taunt you. “As if I would let you loose out there so you could try to stop me. Whaddaya take me for, some kinda chump?! ‘Sides, you never let me finish talking to you about that deal I offered ya!”

“Whatever the Hell it is, I’m not interested.” You tug on the door again before giving up, looking elsewhere. There are no windows, but there is a camera. You move to stand in front of it, waving your arms. “Hey! I’m here! Can someone get me out, please?”

“Shout all you want. Nobody’s comin’ for ya.” She smirks, leaning against a desk and pushing her chest out with a wink. “So why not spend some time alone with Lil Sis Junko? What, are ya scared?”

“I have to get back to everyone.” You state, looking over at the monitor in the corner of the room. “They need me.”

“Need you? Is that what you think?” Standing straight and sticking out her hip, she adjusts a pair of glasses that has materialized on her face. “From what I saw, you did nothing but get your ass kicked and burden everybody with taking care of you. All of your attempts at helping fell flat on their face. People still died. Just wanted to point out that you failed at stopping me twice in a row.”

Purposefully ignoring her words, you swallow the lump in your throat as you pull a chair over to the corner of the room, standing up on it to get a closer look. There are some buttons and knobs, but they’re labeled in Japanese. Looks like you’ll be taking some blind guesses. You press a few buttons, but nothing happens.

“Hey, this next part’s important, so listen up, chucklefuck!” You don’t turn to look at her, but she continues anyway. “Remember how you’re like, a sentient therapy AI created by Alter Ego, and you don’t have a body out in the real world? Yeah, I was thinking… what if you did have a body out in the real world?”

Your hand hovers for a split second over the white knob, a tiny, hesitant pause that you instantly curse yourself for. You turn the knob, doing absolutely nothing, but you know she noticed. You hear her heels click closer to you against the tile. “Interested? Y’know, I could drop your consciousness into one of those empty shells out there. You’d be a living, breathing human. I’ll even let you pick. Wanna be the Ultimate Princess? How about the Mechanic, do you like pink? Or… how would you feel if I dropped you into Kamukura’s body?”

You feel around the sides of the screen, eventually finding a row of buttons on the bottom to mess with. She groans. “Come onnn, I know you’re at least a little curious! You’ve already got a little bit of me in you, can you imagine what would happen if you had my analysis capabilities along with Pekoyama’s sword skills?”

You pause over the last button, replaying her last sentence in your head before finally turning to look at her. “What do you mean?”

“Ohhh, right, yeah you probably don’t remember. Your coding is fifty shades of fucked up, so I honestly don’t blame ya.” She seems entirely too casual about this. “Yeah, you were programmed to identify any and all possible dangers, right? Which means you needed to be able to quickly and accurately survey your surroundings for possible threats. So, in order to do that, they dropped my Ultimate Analyst skill right into your little noggin!”

The screen suddenly loudly bursts to life, startling you. The chair wobbles under your feet, tipping backwards, but before you can hit the floor a pair of arms slides underneath you, one under your shoulders and the other under your knees. Enoshima pulls you tight against her body. She smells of hairspray and rose scented perfume. Her long, sharp nails dig into your flesh as she grins down at you.

“You’ll always have a piece of Lil Sis Junko living inside of you.” She says. “So why not embrace it? Why not come back with me? Let’s rule the world together and revel in all the despair we could bring.”

Over the monitor, a pre-recorded message blares into your ears, and you don’t need to know Japanese to know what the bear is saying.

A body has been discovered.

Chapter Text

Enoshima blips away at some point, but you’re no longer focused on her. You’re watching the trial closely, despite having no clue what the fuck is going on. It’s a feeling you’re used to at this point.

You piece together through the visuals that Tsumiki and Nidai are the victims, but that’s about all you can grasp. No matter how hard you try, you can’t pick up on anything that’s being said, and nobody is here to translate for you. You’re alone in this empty classroom in a building that doesn’t exist.

Come to think of it, you don’t think you’ve ever been alone like this before. You’ve been alone in a room, sure, but this just felt… emptier. More hollow. The only sound comes from the monitor. There’s no rushing wind or gentle sound of the waves to ease your nerves. You’re just sitting on a desk, knees pulled to your chest as you stare at the screen, hoping and praying that somehow, they’ll make it through this. That they’ll get out of that trial room and come find you.

> Are you there?

…

> Please. I don’t want to be alone anymore.

…

> Nanami-san? Can you hear me?

…

Nothing. No matter how hard you try, you can’t reach anyone.

You really, truly are completely alone.

You can’t sit still. Hopping off the desk, you move to the front of the room to the teacher’s desk, pulling open drawers in the hopes of finding something, anything useful. You find papers full of scribbles you can’t read, books and packs of gum, but that’s it. There are bookshelves against the wall, but all of the books are in Japanese. You reach up to try and feel along the top, but you just end up with a dusty hand. Wiping it off on your pants, your eyes land back on the door.

You yank, pull, push, even throw your body against it as hard as you can, but no dice. It’s not budging. Exhausted, you slide down to sit on the floor, leaning against the wooden door frame as tears start welling in your eyes.

There’s no way out. You’re going to rot here until the program eventually ends, and then you’ll vanish from existence. Your consciousness will simply cease to be. You’ll never get to say goodbye properly to anyone. If you’re lucky, they’ll find you here, laying against the door just like Nanami was.

You think back to your last real conversation with her. When you were catatonic in bed, depressed and in pain talking about video games and speedrunning. You wonder if you were programmed with those interests, or if they formed naturally. You aren’t sure.

“... If doing things the intended way isn’t working, you should try breaking the rules.” Nanami’s voice floats through the back of your mind, echoing  her words from what felt like so long ago. “There has to be a break in the collision somewhere. A place you can slip through the cracks and run around out of bounds until you get where you need to be.”

Maybe she’s right. 

Maybe you just haven’t pushed against the right wall yet.

You can’t give up now. Not yet. Not until you’ve exhausted every option.

When speedrunners or game testers look for bugs and glitches, they press against every wall and do every move possible, seeing if just one combination can get them to clip through. Rising back to your feet, you press your body against the door as hard as you can. You spin, jump, crouch, anything to try and wiggle your way through, but nothing happens. You press harder, kicking at the wood and flailing your arms. Maybe somewhere else?

> Any tips? This could takkkkkkkkkk

You get caught on the letter as you fall forwards suddenly, landing hard on the floor with a groan. Pushing yourself up, you find you’re in an empty black void. The ground beneath you is solid though, and you can move easily. Pushing yourself up, you turn around. The door is still unopened, leaving no trace of your presence behind.

You cautiously step forward, arms outstretched, until you hit a solid wall. You move to the left a few feet, then the right. Are you in a hallway? The collision is all here, but it’s invisible. You can see a stray desk or two off in the distance.

You frown. This just wouldn’t do. It could take you ages to get anything done like this. You didn’t have that kind of time. Who knows when Enoshima will notice you’re no longer stuck in the classroom and pull you back in.

You move quickly, sliding your hands along the wall so you at least have a vague idea of where you’re going. The ground is solid, your face is determined, but you can’t help but second guess yourself. Already, you find you miss the safety of the classroom. You don’t know if there’s an unloaded part of the floor somewhere around here. The wallpaper is scratchy under your palms.

You turn a corner, desperately wishing your systems would reboot faster so you could start creating a map of this place to avoid getting lost. With no landmarks, operating on the texture of the wall alone, you could easily lose your place and wind up going in circles, wasting valuable time. You speed up, now borderline sprinting through the empty space, a sense of panic swirling in your chest. 

Your foot fails to find the ground suddenly, and you fall forward, tumbling head over heels down what you eventually realize is a flight of stairs. Bracing your arms over your head, you wait until you hit the bottom, slamming into the ground with a grunt. Cautiously, you move each of your limbs, checking for anything broken. Luckily for you, it seems you just have some minor bruises and scratches. You push up onto your hands and knees, looking around for a moment, before spotting a bright light off in the distance. 

Hope rising in your chest, you scramble to your feet and sprint forward before immediately crashing into a wall face-first. You hear a sickening crunch as you stumble backwards, falling on your ass, clutching your face. Pulling your hands away, they’re coated with crimson and a warm trickle starts falling from your nose. You taste iron. Why did they have to program you to feel pain?

Trying to blink the tears from your eyes, you stick your hands out until you find the wall, leaning against it and waiting for the dizziness to subside and the tears to dry. You have to breathe through your mouth to avoid inhaling your own blood. Your nose is almost definitely broken. Why were you programmed with breakable bones? If you could, you would slap Naegi for doing this to you.

When your vision clears, you notice your blood smeared on the wall, remaining visible. A lightbulb goes off, and you quickly wipe at your face until your hands are soaked, smearing the crimson liquid along the wall as you start stumbling towards the light, rounding the corner. You could mark your path now, however gross your methods may be.

The closer you get, the more apparent it becomes that the light leads outside of the ruins. You can hear the sound of crashing waves, of gulls crying in the summer heat. You fight the instinct to run, a throbbing in your face reminding you of the consequences. Your shirt is now stained, but as you wipe the blood from your face and onto the wall next to you, leaving behind a trail of red that reeked of iron, you can’t find it in you to care about your appearance.

You approach the circular hole in the void, leading out to warm rays of sunshine. Reaching out hesitantly, you find the large metal door has no collision from this side, likely because nobody ever expected someone to be on this side of the door without it being opened. Cautiously, you walk forward, shoes hitting the dirt, sunlight hitting your skin. The air is hot and humid and never before have you been so grateful to be sweaty. Why were you programmed to sweat? You have quite a few questions, but no time to get them answered.

Turning around, you see the door is there now. The void that was once behind you now is trapped behind this large metal vault. You stumble over to the keypad, fingers hovering briefly over the buttons. You glance over your shoulder, out towards the other islands. The trial might be over by now. They could come back at any moment. You might have a chance to say goodbye.

But you don’t know how they’ll react. They saw you die. They watched you get crushed under a boulder right before their very eyes. They may panic, demand more information that you simply couldn’t give them. It went against your coding. Even with how corrupted you were, those firewalls held firm.

One one zero three seven.

You input the code and the metal hatch groans as it creaks open. There’s no choice. In order to save everyone, to protect them and the world from Enoshima and her fury, you had to go back in.

Your blood is still smeared on the walls, but now you can actually see where you’re going. Everything has loaded in properly. You climb the stairs you just fell down and continue through the building, passing by the door to the classroom you were initially trapped in. You pass it by without a second thought, climbing a second set of stairs to the third floor. You move straight, take a left, and approach a large set of double doors.

You swallow thickly. Getting in Enoshima’s way means you’re going to die. For real this time. No more respawns.

The very least you can do is try to take her down with you.

“Matte!”

You freeze, your entire body tensing. No. She has to be messing with you, right? Enoshima is just messing with you. Trying to lure you away.

Footsteps. Rapidly approaching. “Matte, kudasai!”

You turn.

Komaeda skids to a halt, eyes blowing wide open at the sight of your bloodied face. He pants, resting his hands on his knees as he catches his breath. You watch as his shoulders heave with the force of each inhale until he stands straight again, his green eyes meeting your own. He steps forward, reaching out towards your face, and you flinch, grabbing his wrists to stop him from dirtying his hands. Luckily, the blood on yours has dried by now.

He looks down at the dried crimson on your fingertips, still gripping his wrists. He looks you up and down. You must look horrible, covered in blood and wearing the worst outfit ever. Why do you care about what you’re wearing when you’re around him? You’re trying to stop the apocalypse. Should you really be worried about what this boy thinks of you?

“Itai ka?” He asks, his voice low and soft. Tears pool in your eyes, slipping down your cheeks as you squeeze them shut, taking in a shaky breath. “Hai. Itai.”

“Gomenasai.” He hums, moving his hands to intertwine his fingers with yours. His hands are much larger, nearly enveloping you in their touch. They’re cool against your warm skin. “Daijoubu ka?” He asks.

Sniffling, you shake your head. “Iie.” 

His head tilts, messy white hair shifting on his shoulders. “Doushita no?”

Swallowing the lump in your throat, you shake your head again. You don’t have the words. Despite this, he nods, as if reading your mind. Squeezes your hand in his. You’re reminded of your head in his lap, his legs dangling off the couch in his bedroom. You wish you had gone and laid down with him. Spent just a little more time enjoying yourself while you could. Finding joy in those small moments of comfort and quiet.

You want to pull him in closer. To have one last moment with him. Maybe your feelings are just a result of a bug in your programming; a one where a zero should be, one of many mistakes in a sea of jumbled code and corrupted files. But you’re feeling them nonetheless, and you curse Alter Ego for giving you life. You never knew it would hurt so much.

“Komaeda-kun…” Your voice comes out a squeak, and he leans closer, eyes glimmering down at you so intently. You swallow hard, forcing a smile.

“Aishiteru no. Gomen.”

Yanking your hand from his grasp, you take two fistfuls of his jacket and shove him as hard as you can. He stumbles backwards to the ground, and you take your chance. While he’s still confused, you whirl around and sprint at the door, pushing it open and forcing it closed behind you, pressing your back against it to keep it shut. A moment later, you can feel a force on the other side of the door, trying to force it open, but with all of your weight against it, he can’t push it open by himself and he knows it.

“How noble.” A nasally, annoying, cartoonish voce says from the center of the room. “How sickening.”

You lift your eyes to Monokuma, standing firm in the center of the trial circle. His head tilts and the floor begins to shake.

“Let’s skip to the good part, shall we?”

Chapter Text

> Now.

This feels distinctly unfair in a way you weren’t quite expecting. 

Your back still pressed against the door, the muffled sound of Komaeda’s voice barely registering in your ears, you watch as the massive avatar of Enoshima Junko rises from beneath the floor, each footstep shaking the floor hard enough to nearly knock you over. Your jaw drops open, your mind reeling as she grins down at you, reaching into her pocket and pulling out a neon pink cell phone covered in chunky charms. She flips it open, typing something into the keypad, before turning it around and slamming it into the ground, the force of the action being what finally sends you tumbling to the ground. You scramble back to your feet, glancing at the door only to find the handles wrapped in chains and locked securely with a cartoonishly large lock.

The phone screen whirs to life, and a smaller Enoshima fades onto the screen, arms crossed and smiling. Swallowing hard, you approach the trial podium opposite of her, resting your hands on the wood as you stare her down. Giggling, she sticks out a hip. “You ready for shit to get real weird?”

“What do you want from me?” You spit, already annoyed with her games. Tossing her head back in laughter, she holds up a hand to silence you. “Hold on, hold on! We haven’t even started the intro yet!”

From somewhere above, several cameras lower, one of them shoving itself directly in front of your face. You flinch backwards, staring into the lens as Enoshima spreads her arms, a crown appearing atop her head. “Come one, come all to the Ultimate Showdown between Ultimate Analysts! Closed captioning and translations provided to you by Junko Enoshima herself! I expect none of you to miss even a second of this, so gather ‘round and get ready!”

“I-” Your mouth drops open, brow furrowing as you piece it together. “Are you broadcasting this to everyone?”

“Yep! Every monitor on the Island is now showing one thing and one thing only!” Placing her fists on her hips, she grins down at you. “Our showdown! Our battle! Our final standoff, hope versus despair!”

“I can’t believe this…” Pinching the bridge of your nose, you take a deep breath. “Why am I surprised? Of course you’re turning this into a spectacle.”

“A spectacle? What this? I actually think it’s pretty mundane, compared to what’s going on outside.” She giggles. “Oh, wait, I guess nobody else knows about that. Care to explain for me?”

You level your eyes, glaring at her with all the malice you can muster. “You know I can’t do that.”

“Oh yeah! Sucks you’ve got so many rules to follow, y’know.” She waves a hand dismissively. “Oh, well. I guess we’ll just have to get everyone else involved, huh?”

To your right, a screen rises from the floor, turned on but displaying nothing. Enoshima pushes a pair of glasses up on her nose. “In the hotel restaurant, there should now be a keyboard and screen. Using this, you can participate in real time. Simply type or select your answers whenever a question comes up.”

“Wha- seriously?! I thought this would be one-on-one!” You shake the podium in frustration. She tosses her head back, cackling maniacally. “Yeah, you thought! As if I would pass up on an opportunity like this!” Crossing her arms over her chest, she continues. “Alright, first test question, to double-check that everything is running smoothly! I’m sure you’re all dying to know. Why is Leon here? How can they be here if you all watched them die?”

You want to open your mouth and spell it out, to tell the truth so this can be over faster, but you can’t. Your mouth and vocal chords simply won’t move, no matter how hard you try.

But maybe you can get around it, somehow.

“Nanami-san and I bonded over video games, but I died a lot. I wasn’t nearly as good as her.” You swallow thickly. “So after I died, I respawned to try again.”

“Hey! No giving out answers!” Enoshima pouts, and you smirk. “I’m not. I’m just making conversation about video games.”

The screen lights up with text, both in Japanese and translated into English. “Leon is alive because they respawned.”

“Ugh, correct.” Enoshima rolls her eyes in annoyance. “But are you really willing to accept an answer like that? How can a real human being respawn like a video game character?”

Before you can think of a loophole, the screen beeps, the text changing.

“Leon is not human.”

“Can I ask who’s at the keyboard? Just out of curiosity.” You take your eyes off of Enoshima to look into the camera. “Komaeda-kun? Is that you?”

A moment passes before the screen lights up again. “Yes.”

“Could you prove it?” You gesture over to her. “She’s tricked me once before. I’m sorry, but I have to be sure.”

Another moment passes. “I am red.”

You stifle a giggle behind your hand while Enoshima makes an exaggerated gagging sound. “God, you’re so gross, I’m gonna kill myself!”

“Komaeda-kun, you know, don’t you? You’ve been in the funhouse. In the final dead room. That’s where you found out, isn’t it?” You tilt your head, smiling softly into the camera. “Please explain it for me. I can’t.”

This time there’s a longer pause between your words and his answer, but when it comes, you aren’t surprised. “We are within a program called the Neo World Program, and Leon is an artificial intelligence created by the Future Foundation.”

“Correction, actually.” You lower your hands back to the podium. “I was created entirely by another AI known as Alter Ego. Alter Ego was created by Fujisaki Chihiro-sama, who was the Ultimate programmer. But that’s more semantics, I guess. Everything else is right.”

“That’s right! I’m sure Nagito’s explained it to you in person by now, but you’re all harbingers of the apocalypse.” Enoshima cackles, and you flinch when she uses his first name. “You’re all Ultimate Despair, whether you like it or not!”

“Don’t worry.” You say defiantly. “I’m working to get you out of here. Everything is going to be alright!”

“The Future Foundation plopped you guys in here as a way to try and rehabilitate you, but oops! That backfired hella hard!”

“Don’t listen to her! She’s sick!” You grip the podium. “Look, I’m not entirely sure what happened, but I do know that for most of the time we spent together, I thought I was like you. I thought I was human. And even then, I saw the good in you! I saw there was hope for all of you to return to reality and live happy, normal lives!” Blinking the tears back, you swallow. “I’m designed to help you, so please, let me do my job. Let me send you home.”

Enoshima rolls her eyes again. “Ugh, gag me with a spoon. Seriously, I’m sick of all the hope talk coming from you and your buddies. It’s only cute when it comes from Makoto, y’know!”

“Quit using their first names.” You snap. She grins in response, leaning forward. “Aw, what? Sad you never got close enough to anyone to do it yourself? Y’know, in the real world, I was super close to everyone here! They didn’t give a shit if I used their first names.”

“I don’t care.” You state. “Nobody does. None of them are your loyal little dogs anymore; they’ve reverted back to their original personalities. Right now, they’re the people you set out to destroy. And I’m not going to let you redo all the damage you’ve done.”

“Yeah, like I’m gonna feel threatened by the chump who broke their nose running into a wall.” She laughs. “My one regret is not taking you out at the start. You’re way more annoying than I thought you’d be. It was super funny watching you get hurt all the time, though.”

As if on cue, your nose throbs, and you fight the instinct to wince. The bleeding has stopped, but it left the lower half of your face completely coated in the dry red substance, smeared around from when you coated the walls to find your way out of the building. 

Just a little longer…

“Why didn’t you take me out before this all started? Why leave me on the beach?” You tilt your head, narrowing your eyes at her. “Couldn’t do it? Too afraid you’d be found out too quickly?”

“Eh, not necessarily…” She hums. “I knew once I was in, there was no getting me back out without shutting the whole thing down, and with my lackeys in here, there’s no way you would do that. But you tried locking me up before I could start all the fun, so I had to scramble you like an egg. To be perfectly honest, I really thought you were dead until you showed up at the park.”

> Any minute now…

“What are you doing?” She snaps suddenly. “You’re talking to someone.”

“I didn’t say anything.” You reply with a cocky grin. She growls. “Yes, you did! What are you up to?”

A voice to your right answers. “Which one of us are you talking to?”

Another avatar, with your consciousness loaded into it, spawns in at the podium next to you with a flash of light and a smile. To your left, another flash of light, and another you steps forward. “Are you talking to me?”

Flash. Smile. “Or me?”

In moments, there’s another you at every podium, each one looking at her smugly. “Junko-chan, which one of us are you talking to?”

“Huh- I- whaaaat?!” She cries out, the larger her standing up straight in shock. The ‘Graduate’ and ‘Repeat’ buttons pop out of the podiums, and you hover your hands over them - all of you do.

“While you were busy expositioning everyone to death, Alter Ego was duplicating my respawn point in this very room. My job was to keep you busy until they were all ready, and it looks like I succeeded. You just can’t pass up an opportunity to be a smartass, can you?”

“Th-this- this isn’t-” She stutters, but you cut her off. “No. I’m tired of hearing you talk. It’s time for this world to fade from existence - and along with it, the agony of the tragedy.”

“Y-you’ll wipe their memories! Don’t you know that?! You’ll be releasing the Remnants of Despair out into the world, you moron!” She frantically points out.

“I’m in love with a very persuasive boy.” You glance at a camera. “I have no doubt that his hope will carry everyone forward into a better, brighter future. Of course, he won’t be alone, either. He’ll have help.”

“I’m going to rip you limb from limb!” She screeches, the larger her reaching towards you, but all of your hands hit the buttons at the same time, and that Enoshima vanishes from sight as the world around you begins shaking, quaking under the weight of the shutdown. The pink cell phone topples over, taking Enoshima with it as it crashes through the floor, falling into the void below.

“When you get out,” You say as the other yous walk over, merging with you. “Things will be hard. But that’s okay. You have to fight, okay? Chiaki-chan and I didn’t die for you to give up now.”

You can feel it. Consciousnesses blipping out of this world, leaving the program. Tears fill your eyes and spill down your bloodied cheeks. “Everyone. Have hope, okay? And look towards the future. I’m sorry I couldn’t help you sooner. Please take this as my apology.”

The screen lights up with new text - you almost forgot it was there.

‘What happens to you?’

“I’ll be shut down along with everything else.” Your smile holds your sorrow rather than hiding it. 

‘Does it hurt?’

Such a familiar question. “It isn’t painful at all. Like falling asleep without meaning to. Don’t worry about me, okay?” You force your smile wider. “Go out there and make the world a better place for me, okay? And, if it’s not too much trouble... Wake me up and pay me a visit once or twice? I’d like to get the chance to have a real conversation with you for once.” You laugh, the stretch of your lips aggravating your nose and the pain blurring your vision even further, but you don’t care.

You’re alone.

He’s gone.

You can feel it; the world collapsing around you as everything unloads. You clasp your hands, feeling all of your hearts beating as one, for one purpose.

“Everyone… from the bottom of my heart, I… I am in love with the hope that sleeps inside of you all.” You sniffle. “Please never forget that. Keep me… and Chiaki-chan close to your hearts too, okay? Even if it’s just a line of code that tells me so, I know how deeply in love I am with you all. Even those of you I never got the chance to know.”

The world shakes. You are calm. You’re okay with this.

You have to be okay with this.

Are you okay with this?

Are you okay with dying just because a line of code told you to?

Do you have a choice?

Can you create one?

“I’m not ready.” You sob to nobody. “I don’t want to die. I’m not ready! I want to live! I’m alive, let me live, please!”

Something stirs - a door opens - and you run for it.

Chapter Text

“Komaeda-kuuuun!”

You hug him from behind, the soft fabric of his jacket enveloping you in the cent of cotton balls and evergreen trees. Chuckling, he leans back into your touch. “Yes? Is there something you need?”

“Come to the beach with us!” You peer up at him, clinging to the fabric of his jacket. His head tilts. “Eh? Isn’t it just the girls going?”

“Mahiru-chan said it’s alright! Plus, I’m going, so it’s not like there’s no boys allowed or something.” You tug at his jacket. “Come on, pleeeaaase?”

“Hm… alright.” Turning, he pats you on the head. “I’ll head to my cottage to change and meet you there, alright?”

“I’ve gotta change too! We can walk there together!” Releasing his coat to grab his wrist, you tug him towards the cottages. “It’ll be tons of fun! We can eat ice cream and splash around and make sandcastles…”

You trail off when he stops, despite your continued pulling at his wrist. Confused, you turn around, finding a vacant look in his eyes as he stares at the girl’s side of the boardwalk. Directly at an empty cottage, with the door wide open.

“Has that… always been that way?” He asks softly. You shake your head. “I thought nobody took that one? That it was just left empty?”

“I thought so, too… but…” His brow furrows. “I’m… gonna check it out.”

“Huh? But…” Your voice comes out barely above a whisper as you shuffle after him, over to the door. The lights inside are off, the room inside completely empty, void of even furniture. You hear the distant sound of the shower running. A chill rolls through you. Komaeda looks at you over his shoulder. “You can wait outside, if you want.”

“No, I…” You swallow hard. “I’m sorry.”

He blinks, turning around fully to look at you with a confused expression. “You have nothing to apologize for.

“No,” You shake your head. “This time I do

I do

I do

Ĭ̷͇͓̤̪̑̈́ ̷̖̲̀̈́̌͒d̶̡̖͑ơ̶͕̂́͝

I̴͚̮͕̙̩͕͚̪͙̫̲͕̺̳͇̫̪͙̻͒̒̀̈́̽̓̃͊̀̀͊̅̍͋͂̏̓̀́̑͗͗̆̎̈̈͛͗̆̈̆̚̚͝͝͠ ̶̲̫͓͙̼͚̜̓̐̔̃̓̀͗ḑ̸̡̡̡̫̰̱̗̞̹̠̰͙̘̥̻̮̺̭̥͕̦̩̞̦̲̻͗͒̅̆̓́̋̂̈́̑͋̋̒̾̆̊̋̒͐̕͜ͅǫ̵̛̛͉͈̥͙͕̦̟̦̤̼̥̬̫͕̖̯̦̻̺͕̠̿̄̑̾́̈́̀̔̓̅̿̿͆̒͆̈̆̌͐͂͆̎̔͒͊̌̉̈́̒̈́͘̕̕͘͠͠ͅỡ̷̡̡͎̠̻̰̩͓͇̗͍͔̣̲̺̲͖̟̖̦̦̟̻͇̥̜̤͖͇͈̳̞̓͊̌̀̽̅̎̔͋̓̿̊̄͒̊̄̎̅̈́̊͋̔̆̀̕̕͝͠ͅȯ̵̧̙̹͍̖̪͕͖̮̣̬̭͎̲̼̭̗͙̻̓̔̀̐̀̈́̒̋̂̉́̄̈̍́͌̕͘̕͝o̷̡̢̢̨̰͇̮̪̣̘̗̖̲̻̫͔̭̹̻̖̳̤̟̲̰͓͓̟̘̠͈̱̠͈͉͂̄̽̓͌̐́́͂̀͊͆͐̃́̄̑̉̅͒̈̊̌̀̈̈́̾̒̕̕͘͜͝͝ơ̸̧̧̢̙͚̼̙͈̯͚͕̻̥̮̬̦̭̯̦̮̈́̆̆̒̂͂̒͊͘͜ͅờ̷̢̧̛̖͍̬͕̞̘̘̪͍͕̖̣̻͌̋̎̆̌̈́̒̊̌͊̆̀̐͐̆̇̅̆̚̕͝͝ͅǫ̶͙͚͔͕̤͎̝̹̭̺̘̬̤̻̘̼̘̬͈͕̪̭̰͚͑̈́͒̂̾̋̊͛͋͗̃́̓͒͌̈́̈̏̏͂̽̊̽͜͠͝͝o̵̙̻̤̾̒͆͐̓͊̅͑̃̎ȏ̸̢̰̹̱̖͐̈́̐̎̃͑͊̽̌͒͌̀̈́̎̇̄̒̍̏͠ơ̸̗͎͓̣̝̹̰̞̹̬͍̹̭̬̼̭͉̩̊̉̾́̓̈́̒̓̅͆́̾̌̃̀͊̈́̓̅̽̈̀̔̈́͂̈́̔̿̽͆̓̂̕͘͜͝͝͠ơ̶̞̎̑͒̃̾́̈́̓̂̃͌̾̈́̐̀̋͌ǫ̸͉͉̻̬̏͌̋̏̅̑͐̑͗͗͑̄̂͑̈̇̊͝͝͝ơ̴̛̻̒͒̃̃̿̀͊̓͐̒̎̓̏̋̌͊̏͆̉́̊̃̈́̇͛͌͒͠͝ǫ̸̭̲̪̙̟͓͈̮̎͗͌̈́͗͗̑̀͑̈́́̏̀̂̈́̏̈́͐̾͠o̷̧̢̙̙̜̖̖̪̤͖̬͖̹̬͖͔̱̍̄̍̓͋̓͐̐͗̏͆̑̑̏̇͑̾̈́̋̉̀̊̈̃͘̚̕͝͠͠o̷̧̨̠͙̗͎̭̯̘͙̗̰̳͇̫̣͓̲̜̭̝͕̭̻̓̓̔͗̅́̄̾͜͜

Chapter Text

“Komaeda-kuuuun!”

You hug him from behind, the soft fabric of his jacket enveloping you in the cent of cotton balls and evergreen trees. Chuckling, he leans back into your touch. “Yes? Is there something you need?”

“Come to the beach with us!” You peer up at him, clinging to the fabric of his jacket. His head tilts. “Eh? Isn’t it just the girls going?”

“Mahiru-chan said it’s alright! Plus, I’m going, so it’s not like there’s no boys allowed or something.” You tug at his jacket. “Come on, pleeeaaase?”

“Hm… alright.” Turning, he pats you on the head. “I’ll head to my cottage to change and meet you there, alright?”

“I’ve gotta change too! We can walk there together!” Releasing his coat to grab his wrist, you tug him towards the cottages. “It’ll be tons of fun! We can eat ice cream and splash around and make sandcastles… it’ll be great!”

He laughs. “I’m sure it will. I’ll go get changed, alright?” Gently taking his wrist from you, he walks off to his cottage while you hurry over to yours, past the vacant cottage with its door boarded shut. You rush over to your closet, finding a pair of swim trunks and an old T-shirt you don’t care about, then head into the bathroom to change.

You grab a beach towel on your way out along with a bottle of sunscreen, standing at the intersection to wait for Komaeda. He smiles as he locks his cottage door and walks up to you, but it falters as he gets closer, his brow creasing in sudden worry. “Are you alright? What happened?”

You blink up at him, confused. “What do you mean?”

“Your nose,” He points, his other hand coming up to cup your cheek and tilt your head back. “It’s bruised and bleeding. Does that not hurt?”

You reach up, pressing your fingertips to your face and looking at them, and sure enough you find them coated with blood. “Oh. Um. I ran into a wall. I sure am a klutz, huh?”

His frown only deepens. “Maybe we should take you to see Tsumiki-san. This looks pretty bad. It might be broken…” He trails off.

“B-but..! The beach!” You whine, gripping the towel tight in your hands. “We’ll be late!”

“Your health is more important.” He runs a hand through your hair, ruffling it slightly. “It’s alright - I promise we’ll go to the beach after we get you fixed up, okay?” 

“No.” You cross your arms stubbornly. “I’m fine

I’m fine

I’m fine

I̸̟̽I̴̲̼̿Ĭ̸̩̰̍̽I̵̙̽Ǐ̸̱͇̿̚Į̷̳̖͖͛͆Í̸̦͚̃̋I̸͎͂͂̅ͅỊ̸͙̲̯̍̅̔͒I̷̬̫͛̀Ḭ̵͇͇͉͗̑Į̷͈̈Î̸͚̂̀Ĩ̵̹̞̘̺̈́͐̆Ỉ̷̺̝͆̂̚Ī̵͚̖́̊̔I̷̜̫̦͝Ï̵͔͓͕̕Ḯ̸̤Ì̶͇͒͒ͅI̷͍͕͑̎̚I̶̿͐̏ͅĮ̴̝̑̋Ǐ̴̠͙̎I̵̖͓̲̟̅̍İ̴͓ͅḮ̸̱̑̀I̵̹͇̬͛Í̸͉̺̐͜Ì̵̱̯̯I̸̘̿̌͠

Chapter Text

“Komaeda-kuuuun!”

You hug him from behind, the soft fabric of his jacket enveloping you in the cent of cotton balls and evergreen trees. Chuckling, he leans back into your touch. “Yes? Is there something you need?”

“Come to the beach with us!” You peer up at him, clinging to the fabric of his jacket. His head tilts. “Eh? Isn’t it just the girls going?”

“Mahiru-chan said it’s alright! Plus, I’m going, so it’s not like there’s no boys allowed or something.” You tug at his jacket. “Come on, pleeeaaase?”

“Hm… alright.” Turning, he pats you on the head. “I’ll head to my cottage to change and meet you there, alright?”

“I’ve gotta change too! We can walk there together!” Releasing his coat to grab his wrist, you tug him towards the cottages. “It’ll be tons of fun! We can eat ice cream and splash around and make sandcastles… it’ll be great!”

He laughs. “I’m sure it will. I’ll go get changed, alright?” Gently taking his wrist from you, he walks off to his cottage while you hurry over to yours, past the vacant cottage with its door boarded shut. You rush over to your closet, finding a pair of swim trunks and an old T-shirt you don’t care about, then head into the bathroom to change.

You grab a beach towel on your way out along with a bottle of sunscreen, standing at the intersection to wait for Komaeda. He smiles as he locks his cottage door and walks up to you, ruffling your hair. “Let’s get going.”

The two of you head through the gate and towards the beach on the second Island. Absent-mindedly, you reach for his hand, noticing a faint pink tint on his cheeks as you take it, swinging it between the two of you as you go. “What’s your favorite flavor of ice cream, Komaeda-kun?” You ask.

“Hmm…” He thinks for a moment. “Well, sweet things aren’t my favorite… but I suppose if I had to pick, then strawberry. What about you?”

“I think it depends a lot on the brand.” You squeeze his hand in your own, the warmth making your chest tighten. “Chocolate is almost always a safe bet, but sometimes vanilla is really good!”

He stops as the beach comes into view, his expression shifting from content to confused. “... That wasn’t… there before, was it?”

The cottage with the door boarded shut stands in the middle of the sand, between the beachhouse and the water, sticking out like a sore thumb, like a tree growing in the midst of a hiking trail. You furrow your brow.

“Komaeda, stay here.” You instruct flatly, and he looks at you, surprised. “Huh? Why?”

“Please do it, okay?” You cast a smile in his direction. “I promise not to be long.”

Releasing the warmth of his hand, you head towards the cottage. The boards fall as you climb the steps, and the door opens with as little as a push. It’s dark and cold and empty, and the shower is running.

You walk over to the bathroom door, standing in front of it, staring into the wood. 

“What do you want from me?”

The sound of the shower is nearly deafening. 

“Open the door.” She says, like it’s the most simple thing in the word. You scowl.

“No. I don’t… I won’t.” You shake your head, stepping back. You head for the door, but just as you’re about to reach it, it slams shut, locking itself. You mess with the lock and frantically jiggle the handle, but it refuses to open. On the other side, Komaeda knocks frantically, calling out to you. “Hey, are you alright?! Open the door!”

“I can’t!” You call back. “I think it’s stuck!”

You know it isn’t stuck.

“Hold on, I’ll go get help!” Komaeda calls out to you before you hear his footsteps retreating from the cottage. You turn back towards the bathroom, glaring at the door.

“Reader, open the door.” She says. “You have to let go.”

“No.” You shake your head, swallowing the lump in your throat. “No, I don’t. I won’t. It’s not fair. You can’t make me.”

“You’re right.” She replies. “I can’t make you. That’s a decision you have to make all on your own. But I’m not going to sit here and watch while you risk ruining all of your hard work.”

“She can’t come back.” You wrap your arms around yourself. “I’ve got her locked away. She can’t touch this world. Not now, not ever.”

“If you don’t let the program shut down, she’ll find a way.” Her voice turns stern. “You know that. You aren’t stupid.”

“If she ruins this world, I’ll make another.” Keeping your gaze on the floor. “And another. And another. I’ll keep remaking the world until I make one where I can be happy. Where I’m safe.”

“And Komaeda-kun? Where does that leave him?” She questions. “Are you planning to keep him here forever? To keep rewriting his memory so everything goes exactly how you think it should? How do you think he would feel if he knew what you’re doing to him? Is this what love is to you?”

“I don’t know what love is.” 

“Huh?”

You lose your cool, stomping over to the door with tears in your eyes, trembling with the weight of your own emotions. “I don’t know what real, organic love is. I was programmed to love these people, I was programmed to love Komaeda-kun. It’s baked into my very being. But that’s not what he would feel, if he felt love for me at all, is it? Love isn’t baked into his body, his entire personality doesn’t hinge on it. All of my actions so far have been to serve someone I love. I’ve been through so much physical and emotional pain - can’t you just let me have this?!”

There’s a long silence when you’re done, catching your breath, bleary eyes looking over the door. Frustrated, you grab the handle, throwing it open. “Say something! Don’t just stand there!”

Nanami stares at you a moment, eyes wide, barely breathing. Then, she steps forward, taking your face into her hands, her pink eyes looking over your face as her thumb wipes tears from your cheeks. “Oh, Reader. You don’t understand humans at all, do you?”

You blink at her, confused. “Hm?”

“Humans were created to love each other. They’re full of all kinds of love, for everything around them.” Her head tilts, hair shifting around her shoulders. “They’re designed to fall in love with the world, all things, organic or inorganic. They’re designed to fall in love with their children, their creations, the world around them, from the moment they lay eyes on them. Humans have so much love that it’s baked into their very being, their soul - the world would stop spinning if they didn’t. In that way, you and I, we are human because we love.”

You bite your lip to stop its trembling. “The world outside is in shambles. Is that love?”

“No. That’s despair.” She pushes your hair out of your face, tucking the loose strand behind your ear. “Love is looking that despair in the face and finding hope.”

Inhaling a shaky breath, you struggle to find your voice. “I… all I wanted was a chance to talk to him. To learn about him. To find out if I would still love him if I could hold a conversation. All I wanted was a bit of time. Is that… is that wrong of me?”

“Your intentions were pure, but your actions haven’t been.” Her voice is soft, gentle. Comforting. “You can’t run from the truth. And if you want to stop Enoshima, you need to let him go.”

You let the weight of her words sink in, eyes watery and stinging. You swallow hard.

“Do I at least get to say goodbye?” You ask, voice wavering.

“Why would you?” She asks. “This is just the beginning. It’s just the beginning of a story you won’t get to read.”

“But I want to.” You sniffle. “I want to know what happens next.”

“What happens next is entirely up to you.” 

Breathing deeply, you let go.

“Chiaki-chan?” You murmur softly. “I’ll miss you.”

“I’ll miss you too, Reader-chan.” She smiles. “It’s time to go.”

Chapter Text

> REBOOTING…

> CHECKING FUNCTIONAL SYSTEMS…

> LANGUAGE/SPEECH… OK

> AVATAR MOVEMENT… OK

> MEMORY… MULTIPLE FILES CORRUPTED

> RESTORE? Y/N

Y

> ATTEMPTING RESTORATION. PLEASE WAIT…

> …

> RESTORATION UNSUCCESSFUL. TRY AGAIN? Y/N

Y

> ATTEMPTING RESTORATION. PLEASE WAIT…

> …

> RESTORATION UNSUCCESSFUL. TRY AGAIN? Y/N

N

> MEMORY… MULTIPLE FILES CORRUPTED 

> DELETE CORRUPTED FILES? Y/N

Y

> ARE YOU SURE? DELETED MEMORY DATA CANNOT BE RESTORED. Y/N

Y

> DELETING CORRUPTED MEMORY DATA. PLEASE WAIT…

> …

> CORRUPTED DATA DELETED.

Reboot READR.AI

> REBOOTING…

> CHECKING FUNCTIONAL SYSTEMS…

> LANGUAGE/SPEECH… OK

> AVATAR MOVEMENT… OK

> MEMORY… OK

> COMPATIBLE MODULE DETECTED. UPLOAD READR.AI? Y/N

Y

> BEGINNING UPLOAD. THIS MAY TAKE A WHILE…

[2% Complete…]

Chapter Text

“I’m very proud of your progress, Reader. I want you to know that.”

Your lips curl up into a smile. “Thank you, Naegi-sama.”

“Ah, just use ‘kun’... or you could use my first name, if you’d like.” he laughs, rubbing the back of his neck. “I’m not a god, and I’m not your boss. I’m your friend. No need to be so formal.”

“But you aided in my creation.” You point out. “Looking at it that way, you’re more like my father… should I call you Otosan?” He visibly cringes at the word, and you can’t help but burst out laughing. “Sorry, Naegi-sama. You’re really fun to mess with.”

Pouting, he stands from his chair, reaching for your hand to flip your wrist over. “Open, please.”

Your outer layer of skin pulls back, revealing porcelain white metal underneath. A small panel dips inwards then slides aside, exposing your wiring to him. He looks around, moving a few things aside to get a better look. “You’ve run diagnostics?”

“Yeah, but I couldn’t find any reason for the hand to not be working.” You shrug. “It just... Won’t move, no matter how much I tell it to.”

“Well, I’m not seeing anything… then again, it’s not like I’m the most knowledgeable on this stuff.” He mutters softly. “I’m not sure who I could take you to… well, except for the Ultimate Mechanic, but-”

“The Ultimate Mechanic is still alive? Why haven’t I been taken to him yet?” Your brow furrows as you roll your shoulder, a squeaky noise sounding from it. “You’re telling me I’ve been dealing with that creaking for three months and there’s been an Ultimate Mechanic this entire time?”

Naegi looks away, patting your hand as a signal for you to close your wrist. “It’s… he’s one of the Remnants of Despair.”

You pause. “... Oh.”

A heavy silence hangs in the air. Your memories of your time within the Neo World Program are hazy at best. You remember a constant ache, a perpetual pain that seeped into your bones. You get the sense it wasn’t a pleasant time for you, but for some strange reason, part of you misses it. You miss that world where you had warmth to your skin. 

Sighing heavily, Naegi rubs his temples. “As much as I hate to say it, we can’t have you walking around with a non-functional hand, if there’s something we can do about it. There’s a boat full of supplies going out next week. We can make the trip out there, if you’re alright with it.”

“Will they be alright with it? I mean, last time they saw me… I can’t imagine that would be a nice experience for them.” You shift uncomfortably in your seat. Naegi stares at the floor for a moment, thinking. “... I’ll call and ask Hinata-kun about it later. He’ll be a better judge for it than me.”

“Hinata-kun…” You mumble softly. “Is that Kamukura Izuru?”

Naegi flinches. “Yes, but don’t call him that. His name is Hinata Hajime.”

“Yes, Naegi-sama.” You nod. “... What’s he like?”

He seems a bit taken aback, but taps his chin, humming in thought. “Well… he’s very smart and capable. He’s also strong… and he’s very kind. So you shouldn’t feel nervous about meeting him again, okay?”

“Again?” Your head tilts. “I’ve met him before?”

Naegi’s smile falters. “Well, he’s met you, at least.”

Later that night, Naegi calls you into his office. The prompt appears at the corner of your vision while making tea with Kirigiri. You make sure to inform her before leaving. You’ve learned that wandering off is a bad thing when you’re an accident-prone android.

When you walk in, Naegi smiles at you over his computer screen. “They just walked in. Would you like to talk tothem?”

A voice on the other end hesitates. “... Sure.” He finally says. Naegi gets up from his chair as you walk around the desk, hands clasped nervously as you sit down, ensuring that you’re in frame. Naegi stands behind you. “Reader-chan, this is Hinata Hajime. Remember me telling you about him earlier?”

“Yes. It’s nice to meet you, Hinata-sama.” You smile. The man looks at you in what you can only describe as awe. He leans in closer to the screen in an attempt to get a better look. “American? Is that you?”

You blink, lips pulling into a frown. “I’m.. am I American?” You look at Naegi for answers as he leans down, laughing softly as he gets into frame. “Ahaha, they probably don’t remember that nickname, Hinata. A lot was lost in the corrupted files.” He ruffles your hair. “We were lucky we managed to reboot them at all.”

“Right… right.” Hinata leans back, his brow twitching. He seems anxious, mildly displeased. Your frown deepens as Naegi clears his throat. “They can’t move their right hand. Would it be alright if we brought them with us next week so Soda-kun can take a look at it?”

“Yeah, that should be alright. Maybe a little startling, but things over here have been going pretty smoothly.” He folds his arms. “I’ll make sure to let everyone know so it’s not too surprising.”

“Great! Thank you so much, Hinata-kun.”

“No problem, Makoto. I’ll see you next week.”

You’ve never packed for a trip before. Even though Naegi insists it’s just for business, that you’ll only be spending a night there so pack lightly, but it’s hard when you don’t know what to pick. You don’t overheat, so you could dress in layers if you wanted, but you’ll definitely stand out that way. You have figured out that nudity is not an option, which you think is weird considering you have no genitalia, but you’ve learned to accept it. Finding a balance between the two feels impossible, but somehow, you manage.

You get on the boat at exactly 5:54 AM, and it departs at exactly 6:14 AM, twenty minutes later. It takes twelve hours to get from the mainland to Jabberwock Island by boat, so you have plenty of free time to roam around the ship, as long as you don’t bother the night crew. 

“I wish we could’ve brought Alter Ego.” You lean against the railing, peering down into the stark blue of the ocean. “Hey, Togami-sama, are mermaids real?”

“What? No. Shouldn’t you know that already?” The blonde man raises an eyebrow at you, adjusting his glasses. You shrug. “Well, just because nobody’s found one yet doesn’t mean they're fake.”

“Sometimes I wish we left your analyst ability in there.” He sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose. You watch as he walks off, probably to do something productive with his time. You frown. You wish they left it in too, but they said it made you ‘too much like Enoshima.’ You don’t understand. Maybe you would if they left it in.

“So, you the robot?” One of the ship’s crew members catches your attention. You smile and nod. “Android, but yes.”

He looks you up and down, a sneer on his face, before giving a soft ‘hmph’ and walking away. Your smile fades.

You end up spending most of the trip sitting in Kirigiri’s room, playing on an old 3DS she found. She let you use it as a distraction when she needed you to not interrupt during important meetings or events. You couldn’t say you really minded, you just wish she had more than one game. You’ve beaten this one countless times now. At least now you have the added challenge of not being able to use your right hand.

The sun kisses the horizon as the Island comes into view. You watch through the window as it gets closer and closer, until Kirigiri comes to get you.

You help carry some boxes of paperwork stacked higher than your head. They like making you carry heavy stuff because you’re made of metal, and even though you’re using one hand, you can carry more than most of the humans on board. You shuffle down the ramp, careful not to move too quickly, setting the boxes down where you’re told before straightening up again. You look around, curious of your new surroundings, and spot Hinata not far away, counting boxes. He makes eye contact with you and seems taken aback, eyes widening. He glances away momentarily before looking back at you and offering an awkward smile. Kirigiri takes your malfunctioning hand and tugs you away.

You follow behind her quietly. You like Kirigiri. She’s always been polite with you, asking for your help doing certain tasks, and keeping an eye out for you whenever someone gives you an odd look. You eventually figured out that some people simply dislike the idea of your existence. Something replicating a human, but remaining inhuman regardless. It frightens them. You don’t understand why.

It’s that same frightened look that has dumbfounded you for so long that you find on Soda’s face when you enter the hanger he typically works inside. The moment his gaze lands on you, his sharp-toothed grin fades, his eyes seeming vacant as he stares. You feel uncomfortable already.

“I assume Hinata briefed you?” Kirigiri speaks up, snapping him out of his trance-like state. “Oh, uh, yeah. Said you used some old blueprints of mine or somethin’?”

“That, along with some things scraped up from the former Ultimate Robotics Expert.” She affirms, guiding you over and flipping your arm to show him your wrist. “Please open.”

Again, the fake flesh melts away as the wrist panel opens, revealing your wiring inside. Now Soda’s eyes light up, excited by whatever he sees. “Woah, this is so complex… hey, does it have feeling in any of its limbs?”

“They can register when touched, yes.” Kirigiri nods, and you notice the tiniest twitch of her brow, her tone shifting so slightly you likely wouldn’t notice if you were human. “They also have heat sensors, night vision, and a hidden compartment for storing important items.”

“Awesome…” He breathes, staring for a moment longer before shaking his head. “Sorry. Um… hm. I don’t see anything wrong here…” He takes a closer look. “Maybe there’s something wrong further up? Is there another panel like this on its chest?” 

“On their chest, yes.” Her eyes narrow to glare at him before she glances at you. “Please remove your shirt.”

You lift your t-shirt off over your head, pulling back the skin over your chest panel before opening it. This panel is situated on the right side of your chest, near your collarbone. You have much more intricate, sensitive wiring in your torso, so you feel oddly exposed like this. Soda leans in, pulling a small flashlight attached to his keychain off his belt loop and shining it inside. “Nice, sturdy skeleton… flexible joints…. This is amazing…” He’s muttering mostly to himself, practically drooling over you. You shift uncomfortably, fighting the urge to pull away. This is necessary, right?

He pauses suddenly, eyes going wide and vacant again. You anxiously pick at your fingers. “W-what’s wrong?” You ask quietly.

“... How did it get those scars?” He points at the slightly lighter markings on your torso, one right below your ribs on your right side, and the other in the center of your stomach, perfectly round. You laugh nervously, shrugging. “Um… I don’t know? They just… felt natural when I decided what to look like.”

He stands there for a moment longer before straightening suddenly, rushing around you. “I can’t do this, can’t do this…” He mutters as he practically sprints out the door, leaving you both relieved and confused. Kirigiri sighs. “Don’t worry. I’ll go get Hinata-kun, and he’ll come by and do it. I never liked that one much, anyway.”

You stand alone in the warehouse, clutching your shirt.

Why do you have scars? You don’t have skin. Not real skin, anyway. What covers you is just a thin bionic membrane that you can pull back like a curtain at will. You could change its hue and pattern to anything you would like, but you chose this. You chose this color with these scars on your body. You don’t know why for sure. You wonder if you should remove them.

You sit down on a metal table to wait, staring down at them.

You have one on your face, don’t you? It goes directly across your nose. Why didn’t Soda mention that one?

Come to think of it, did he ever make eye contact with you?

The door’s hinges creak as it opens, and Hinata steps inside, closing it behind him. He smiles that awkward smile again as he walks up to you. Your chest plate is still open, but you turn your wrist so he can look there, too, if he wants.

“Good evening, Reader.” He says softly as he glances over the wiring in your arm. “Did you like the trip?”

You relax a little. “Yeah. I’ve never been outside of the Foundation Before. Not like this, anyway.”

“You can close that; the problem is higher up.” He states, leaning closer to peer into your chest. “Really? Do they not let you outside?”

“Well, I’ve never asked before. I don’t know that they would let me.” You watch as he reaches inside, gently brushing a few wires to the left so he can get a look behind them. “I don’t think I want to though. People look at me funny. Especially once they figure out I’m not human.”

He frowns softly. “Well, I’m sorry to hear that. You’re a technological marvel.”

“Ah, thank you.” You reply, watching as he picks up a small screwdriver. “I see the problem. Be still.” He instructs, and you obey, not moving an inch. You feel a tight, burning sensation in your chest, but it only lasts a moment. He pulls back. “Can you move the hand now?”

You lift the hand, wiggling your fingers before smiling and making a fist. Hinata grins. “There we are.”

“Thank you, Hinata-sama!” You grin up at him, happy to have the movement back in your hand. “What was wrong?”

“A loose screw and an unattached ground wire.” His smile seems much more relaxed now, less anxious. It makes you happy. He looks you over. “Anything else? What about your nose? How’d you get that mark?” He leans forward to get a closer look, rubbing his thumb over it. You blink, going cross-eyed trying to watch him. “Oh, I just… look like that. I can customize my appearance and voice at will.”

“Ah, I see. Sorry about that.” He leans back, and you close your chest plate as you point at your left shoulder. “Actually, this has been squeaking for a while now. Could you take a look at it? Togami-sama says it’s annoying, and I’d like him to stop yelling at me.”

“Sure, open up.” He nods, and you open the panel on your left side. There’s thick tubing there, running water through your body so you never overheat, along with the wires. You were designed very carefully, you’ve noticed. There’s something intimate about the scratches on your screws, showing the trial and error of getting the tightness exactly right so you could move fluidly.

Hinata takes a peek inside. “Huh. Looks like you’re missing a bolt. Hold on, I’ve got a spare that looks like it’ll fit.” He digs through a small box, looking for the correct bolt. “Does Togami-kun yell at you often?”

“Not any more than he yells at everyone.” You shake your head. “He’s actually gotten better over time, I think. That’s what Naegi-sama says, anyway.”

He hums softly, nodding his head. “How long have you been activated?”

“About six months now. I’ve been told that on the anniversary, I’m going to get a birthday party.” 

“Oh really? Are you excited?”

“I don’t know. I’ve never been to a birthday party before.” You shrug. “But I think it would make them happy, so I don’t mind. Maybe I’ll like it.”

Finally finding the correct bolt, he reaches inside to screw it into place. “Hold still…” he mumbles, and you obey, waiting patiently for him to be done. “Y’know, at first it was strange seeing you again in person. It was just… hard to believe you were real, I guess. You don’t look a day older than when I last saw you in the program.”

You’re careful as you respond, to avoid moving anything near where he’s working. You look away timidly. “Ah. I’m… I’m sorry, but…”

“I know. You don’t remember.” Finishing up, he removes his hands. “That’s okay. To be honest, we all struggled to remember what went on in there for a while. But we made it through.”

Closing your chest plate, you roll your shoulder. No creaking. Smiling, you look back to Hinata. “Thank you, Hinata-sama.”

“Please, use ‘kun’.” He nods. “There was actually someone who wanted to see you - do you mind?”

You pull your shirt back on and follow Hinata out of the warehouse, towards the Hotel. Something about the walk up to the gate feels familiar, but you ignore that feeling as he leads you past the cottages, up the stairs and into the restaurant above. He stops you just outside the door. “Let me tell them you’re here.”

Hinata walks inside in front of you, and you wait quietly, listening closely to see if you hear anything, but no dice. You shift anxiously from foot to foot. When the door opens, Hinata smiles at you, gently taking you by your newly-fixed hand and tugging you inside.

There’s a girl in here, with short blonde hair and icy blue eyes. Her face lights up as she sees you, clapping her hands over her mouth. “Oh, my…”

“Reader-chan, this is Sonia Nevermind.” Hinata introduces. “You two were very close while in the program.”

“We were?” You ask, glancing up at him nervously, and he nods. “Yep. You two were practically inseparable.”

Sonia approaches quickly, cupping your face in her hands to get a good look at your face. She brushes a hand over the scar on your nose, eyes flicking about as she takes in your every feature, as if you’ll evaporate in her grasp. Her eyes well with tears, bottom lip quivering, and you panic, unsure of what to say. “U-uh- I’m sorry!” 

She bursts into laughter, throwing her arms around you. “My friend, you haven’t changed at all, have you?” She rocks back and forth, her grasp tight. You return the hug, a sense of familiarity washing over you and making your eyes water. As you press your hands into her back, you feel something is missing there. Confused, you feel around, only for it to dawn on you a moment later.

“Your hair,” You whisper. “It’s short now.”

She pulls back, smiling at you. “That is correct! I cut it not long after waking up. It was very impractical, with how hot it gets on the Island.”

This is… good. She is good. 

You missed her.

“I missed you.” A smile creeps onto your face. “I didn’t know I missed you.”

“I missed you, too.” She replies, sniffling. You blink, the metaphorical gears in your head turning. “I… I missed everyone. ” You mumble, piecing it together. “I love everyone. Sonia-sama, where is everyone? I need to see them right now!” You grab at her hands frantically, and she nods with enthusiasm. “Yes! Yes, you can see everyone, I promise you! But it is getting late. Shall we turn in for the night?”

“Oh.” You relax a bit, feeling slightly disappointed, but understanding. “That’s alright. Where do I go?”

“You’ve got a room downstairs in the hotel.” Hinata chimes in. “Come on, I’ll walk you there.”

After saying goodbye and parting ways with Sonia, you follow Hinata downstairs and down a hallway to your room. Room 7. He hands you a small key. “Here. Sleep well alright?”

“I don’t sleep.” You state, taking the key. “But I’m very excited for morning, so I’ll wait.”

You lock the door behind you and open your bag, taking out your pajamas. You don’t technically need them, as you don’t sweat, but this is the routine programmed into you. There’s no harm in it. 

You lay down in the bed, staring up at the ceiling to patiently await morning.

At exactly 11:42 PM, there’s a knock at your door. You stand up and walk over, reaching for the handle, completely forgetting the peephole existed. (It wasn’t like you couldn’t handle yourself, anyway. You were far stronger than most humans on Earth.)

When you open the door, there’s a boy standing there. White hair, around 6’2, broad shoulders. One of his arms, from the elbow down, is an incredibly advanced prosthetic. You stare at him. He stares back with wide green eyes.

A few beats of silence pass, before something in the back of your head clicks, and your eyes go wide. Vague sensations, your head in someone’s lap, a rare genuine smile, a soft hand in your own. Your chest feels tight.

“Komaeda-kun.”

He smiles softly, warm and real. 

“Amerikajin-kun.”

You can’t help but laugh. “I’m not American, silly.”

“Sorry.” He chuckles. “Reader. That’s your name, right?”

“Yeah. It ended up being my favorite, even if it sounds a little silly.” 

“Reader-kun.” He hums. “I like it. It suits you.”

More silence. You’re unsure what to say. What to do.

You step forward; slow, hesitant, watching his body language as you cautiously reach out, wrapping your arms around him loosely. He returns the gesture, cradling the back of your head in his metal palm. He lets out a shaky breath, squeezing you slightly.

“If it’s alright with you,” You whisper. “I’d love to get to know you better.”

He nods. “I think I would like that.”