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It was Diluc's seventeenth birthday. The winery had the whole day in motion, a gala was thrown as per tradition every year after he turned fifteen, Crepus used the occasion to lure investors and business partners to Mondstat, and, of course, to give Diluc an event with his peers.
The gala, however, ended pretty early. Since Diluc was already a captain, more often than not he had to raise together with the sun to make sure things were running smoothly in the city of the wind. Just as most of his close friends were knights as well, Jean, for example, had shown up in her armor for not more than ten minutes because she need to go back to her patrols.
The knights overall we're a pretty small unit, especially with the adaptations being made for Varka's expedition, which would take an even bigger chunk of people with him. Diluc didn't complain, however. Working hard was almost instinctual to him, the title of cavalry captain suited him well enough. The feeling of accomplishment every time a citizen came to him for his job, seeing his father's chest swell in pride was what kept him going from a young age.
This night, in special, Diluc felt especially giddy. He didn't say his birthday was that big of a deal but Kaeya had whispered to him in the middle of the party that he would give Diluc his gift after the whole house was sleeping. The Ragnvindr heir know their codes well enough to know what that meant. It has been a couple of months, maybe years since they last find themselves sneaking out of their rooms in the middle of the night to meet on the mansion's roof just to spend a little more time with each other, the obligations as knights occupying most of their life.
Diluc got ready after he heard carefully Crepus close his bedroom door and made the usual way out of the window. Kaeya was already there with a bottle of wine and a bottle of grape juice in each hand.
"You are late, D." He said with a grin.
"You climb way too fast, that can't be safe." He answered in the same tone.
Carefully he made his way to Kaeya's side, sitting down gracefully, the cold night wind making a chill go through his body. Kaeya gave him the bottle of juice, knowing well that he wasn't able to hold his liquor nor liked the burning sensation down his throat.
"The winery heir that doesn't drink wine, you are a silly one, don't you know?" Diluc gave him the shoulders, body getting close to Kaeya's knowing well he was getting cold already. The young circled his waist with his arm and Diluc let his head fall on his shoulder, lazily sipping his grape juice.
"Where is my gift?" He said after a few seconds of silence.
"Isn't my company gift enough?"
"I am with you all the time, I was promised a gift."
Kaeya let go of his small bottle of wine, with his now free hand he pushed Diluc's chin up, brushing his lips against the older, just enough to make both sighs against each other mouth.
"I can only drink grape juice when it is from your lips." The younger kissed him deep in passion by the white shine of the moon. "Happy birthday," Kaeya whispered putting some space between them and reaching out for the box on his other side, giving it to Diluc. "You have been working so hard, you need to take care of your hands"
In the box wooden box was a pair of black gloves, Diluc took and put them on. It fitted perfectly, felt soft against his calloused hands, so used to the roughness of his claymore. Diluc smiled, Kaeya was such a thoughtful person, it brought butterflies to his belly. "Thank you very much, they are amazing." The redhead held Kaeya's face with both of his hands, kissing him gently.
Kaeya raised one of his hands to Diluc's hair, untying it with the precision of someone who had already done it a million times. The younger smiled when he felt the wind ruffling the red strands, feeling them soft against his cheeks.
"Barbatos wants to give you a birthday kiss too." He said touching his forehead with the other.
"Shut up, Kae," Diluc answered blushing.
Diluc was a hell of a fighter. Kaeya most desired competition as well as his prime example. He had amazing form and brutal force combined with battlefield strategy like no other. He loved to watch him fight. However at this moment, when the violent strikes were directed at him, Kaeya felt terrified.
Making eighteen years old should be the prime of his young years, a beautiful mark on his story. But the night had turned into a tragic chain of events. Crepus was dead. Diluc had left his position with the knights. And now Kaeya came to him with some more crushing news. He knew it wasn't fair, the timing was off but the weight on his chest felt way too heavy to keep just for himself.
Kaeya could count on one hand the number of times he saw Diluc lose temper, looking as disheveled as he looked at the moment, the rage making him sloppier but stronger, his eyes seemed to have lost focus almost like and feral best searching for violence losing the sight of everything else around.
The younger had drawn his blade just to make it easier to block some of the brutal advances. He expected it, the range. He knew that he deserved it. Mondstat have give him their trust without asking for anything, yet he was there. A spy. A traitor. His tears got lost in the rain, he was drenched, the soil beneath his feet becoming more unreliable by the instant until it gave out.
Kaeya's feet slipped as he dodge, it was almost enough but the tip of the great sword made its way to his face, cutting a sharp line from under his eye to just above his eyebrow, the impact and the pain making yelp, his body finally giving in, he fell to the ground, one hand over the cut, his right eyes just blinded by the blood dropping, Kaeya had his raised blade up as one last claim for mercy even when he didn't deserve it. Maybe this is how he was supposed to go. Consumed by fire at the hands of the one he loved the most.
The moment Diluc shared his last attack, the pale blue of the ice met the intense red of the flames, a blast that sent them both away from each other as the pulsating cryo vision dropped to the ground. That seemed to take Diluc out of his haze, his eyes focusing on Kaeya for a second through the torrential rain that only seemed to get more intense.
Kaeya still on the ground saw Diluc's heavy breathing, he looked like a whole different man. He looked at Kaeya as if he was a stranger. The redhead put his claymore away and with one last look turned his back to Kaeya, making his way to the winery.
Trembling, Kaeya caught the pulsating vision from the ground, the tears as thick as the rain. He held it in his hand, one last grace was given to him, yet he could never say it was worth it, not when he felt like he lost everything.
Diluc didn't come back for three birthdays. Kaeya pretended to not expect him to be back even tho every day his thoughts were with the older. He worried about his safety, the only reply he got from Diluc was in the first year he was traveling, peeking about his whereabouts whenever he could, with very shallow news.
When the Rangvindr heir showed up again he knew on the same day. His hawk flying over Mondstat was the sign he needed, he couldn't ever mistake the bird that he saw growing up, in the back of his mind, he liked to think Diluc sent the bird to warn him even though he knew it was better to not indulge himself with those thoughts.
He waited two days before going to the winery, almost four years outside the house, Diluc probably needed enough time to settle down, if he could guess he would bet that the older was injured. Information made its way to him as if it was a normal course.
The thin rain was almost a sad reminder of the events from years ago. It was almost noon, the familiar scenario made him feel quite nostalgic, remembering how he used to make this path every day, mostly by the company of Diluc after a full day working.
Hesitantly he tapped at the door, being greeted by Adeline as usual. He flashed her his usual smile and didn't say anything. It was enough for her to give him the space to enter the winery, the house looking alive again as the employees found happiness in the return of their master.
"He is upstairs in his father's office." She said.
Every step of the stair seemed to make his legs heavier, but he knew well enough that he would only find peace after seeing the other. He didn't bother waiting for permission to enter, just making his way through the room. Diluc snapped his head from the papers he was reading, it looked like a bunch of letters.
"Sir Kaeya." Diluc's voice was thicker than he remembered. He looked older as the teen years were past him now. Kaeya sighed.
"Master Diluc," he answered tentatively.
"Don't call me like that, it's weird coming from you."
The tension between them was thick. Both had so much to say but the hesitation of breaking the thin veil of stability that circled them.
"Saw your falcon at the city two days ago, have you sent him on patrol?" Kaeya asked, a crooked smile on his lips. Diluc didn't answer, head falling back on the papers at the desk, Kaeya adjusted himself against a window. "Heard a lot about your adventures when you were away until it became quiet a couple of months ago. There is something you might want to report to the ordo of Favonius?" He provoked. Kaeya didn't like to be ignored but most importantly he want Diluc to talk to him. That seemed to do the trick.
"No." It was a dry answer, he looked mildly annoyed. "Can I do something for you or do you just come here for an interrogation? If that's the case you can see yourself out." Diluc got up. Kaeya tried to not notice how he looked wider, the few years apart surely turned him into a man. The first step outside his desk made his knee falter, his hand held the desk quickly, almost unnoticeable if Kaeya wasn't excruciating his every move.
"You are hurt." He concludes making his way to the other.
"I am sure you already knew that."
Kaeya came close, inspecting the other, his gloved hand touched Diluc's face for the first time in years. He felt his skin warm up in a second, the emotion rushing through him like a wildfire in a dry forest. Diluc looked at him, his eyes saying way too much as his mouth couldn't form words. He wanted to hate Kaeya, he wanted that so bad but he knew he couldn't. "I missed you so much." Kaeya had closed his eyes as he whispered that, his forehead touching Diluc's. The redhead held his wrist, tears making their way to his eyes. "I am so sorry," he continued.
"I am the one who should be sorry," Diluc answered, a tear falling to his face. "I know it was a crazy night but I shouldn't have hurt you."
"It's ok. I deserved it." The older was about to answer when Kaeya touched his lips against the other's, making him quiet instantly. "I never blamed you for what went down, you don't need to apologize."
Diluc held a hand against Kaeya's neck, keeping him in place while finally kissing him, trying to convey the heaviness on his chest, the sorrow on his soul, the longing on his bones.
"You didn't deserve any of that." Kaeya had a sad smile hanging on his lips as they parted. "Can I see the scar?" Diluc continued, and Kaeya nodded.
Carefully, as if any sudden movement could shatter the moment, he removed the eye patch from the other's face. He was greeted with the attentive golden eye and a thick mark making its way. Diluc couldn't hold the sob when his finger carefully touched it. Life wasn't fair to him, but he never meant to let things go this far.
"It's ok," Kaeya said, his voice sweet and caring. "Hey, D, it's ok." He repeated.
Kaeya was stunned silent when he felt the warm lips against his eyes, his whole body going still for a second. He didn't even notice the tears until Diluc cleaned them out of his face, hands still as calloused as he remember but just as gentle.
Diluc kissed him again. And again. They had hurt each other so much, but being together was inevitable. Not when there was so much trust and love stubbornly kept them together.
"I am sorry," Diluc said one last time.
"Just don't run away from me again."