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light my wounds with kerosene

Summary:

Natsuo gets off the Shinkansen and heads up to street level. He’s meeting Shouto outside the restaurant, and they’ve chosen an expensive one that requires reservation, and in true Todoroki fashion, ordered a private room — though this is more to spend more of Endeavor’s money than to show off. Shouto’s in charge of swiping the card for the most part, just to avoid reminding Endeavor that Natsuo can visit the family; a little train ride to Musutafu is one thing, but charge after charge might actually get him to call...

Probably not, because Endeavor doesn’t tend to care about his purchases and likes to pretend he doesn’t exist, but it’s better not to test it.

In any case, Shouto had seemed plenty happy over their messages to be responsible for picking an expensive restaurant and swiping Endeavor’s beloved black credit card on a shopping day to spend as much of Endeavor’s money as possible. He’d started making plans right away, and Natsuo was all too happy to contribute.

Notes:

so idk i just meant to write like a tiny little bit about brothers deciding to meet back up again and then leave it at that and then the next thing i knew this was almost 3.5k long ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ but like. whatever, i had a good time writing it lol. anyways, the title is from beaten in lips by beartooth (but if you watch the video / listen to the song, keep in mind it's about abuse so the video / lyrics are graphic)

anyways, as for the latest on goings, like i said last time i posted i am still totally destitute, but i've had to put the job search on hold until the surgery is over because i'm just so sick. i sleep about 90% of the time right now, so i'm also putting the series schedule on hold with no real end plan in sight? i'll post as i see fit for now.

my pre-op appointment went well and i'm scheduled for my surgery on wednesday. if all goes well (and it should) then hopefully i'll be doing better physically soon. things are really, really bad so i can't make guarantees yet on when the update schedule's going back into place. but in the meantime if anything changes, you can keep up with that through my socials linked on my carrd or you can get info through the series discord server.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

Shouto stared down his phone in disbelief, in delight, in wonder. How long had it been since Shouto had heard from Natsuo, seen Natsuo? And yet there, there it was, a text message from his brother. Several text messages from his brother.

Natsuo:

Hey, Lil Bro, I know it’s been awhile, but I was thinking maybe it would be a good idea if we met up again for the day sometime. If that was something you wanted. I know I kinda abandoned you to deal with dad alone and I’d get it if you didn’t want to see me again. But if you did... I could grab a train and come see you sometime?

It’s up to you. Just let me know.

I just... I’d really like to see you again.

Also, I saw you during the Sports Festival. You did great out there. I know Endeavor’s probably fuming that you didn’t win, but you did great. Third place is amazing, and you should be proud.

Shouto looked down at those messages for a long, long time. He really didn’t blame Natsuo for leaving, for running the first chance he got. Not the way Natsuo seemed to blame himself. It wasn’t safe here for any of them, but especially for him, and saving himself... it was the right choice.

For a long time, Shouto had been afraid he’d end up having no brothers at all.

If not because of Endeavor’s actions, because of Natsuo’s. He feared Natsuo becoming another statistic — waking up to find his sister screaming over a body instead of finding his brother at breakfast. He’d watched his brother come to every meal with bruises and burns, looking more and more rundown, more and more tired and he didn’t know how much more Natsuo could take.

And Shouto loved his brother.

He didn’t want to see another shrine in Endeavor’s office that he and Fuyumi would have to sneak to see. He wanted his brother at his side, of course, but he’d rather have his brother alive and never see him again, never talk to him again, then have him dead and gone. So when Natsuo went off to university and started distancing himself before no longer talking to any of them anymore, Shouto didn’t blame him.

This family was unhealthy.

He loved Fuyumi, but the way she wanted to forgive their father, the way she wanted to fix the family, as though it could be fixed — no, this was too broken. Mother was taken away, Natsuo wasn’t even allowed to visit because of his Quirkless status — they took one look at his ID and turned him away, because god forbid a Quirkless person be in a hospital even to visit. Father abused them all, because that’s what it was, and she refused to see it for what it was. She wanted to forgive that, but he hadn’t even stopped until Izuku had came and blackmailed him into behaving at home and at work.

He wasn’t actually sorry.

You don’t forgive people who aren’t sorry, Shouto thinks. If given a chance, Shouto knows Endeavor would go right back to everything he was doing before.

There was no forgiving this, as far as Shouto was concerned.

No, Shouto didn’t blame Natsuo at all.

Shouto:

yeah, i’d like that a lot. we should see each other again soon. i’ve missed you a lot.

and natsuo?

Natsuo:

I’ll come down for a Sunday soon, then. UA gives you Sundays off, right? We can get lunch and look around some shops, maybe dinner before I catch a late train home?

Yeah?

Shouto:

i don’t blame you for leaving. i missed you but i’m glad you left. touya didn’t make it. YOU wouldn’t have made it. and i would rather have my brother. you did what you had to do to protect yourself.

i’m just glad you’re ready to talk to me again now.

Shouto lays back on his bed and closes his eyes for a minute. He’s happy. He’s really happy. Things are good. Things are really good. His two favorite people are most likely coming into the hero course with him. Things may remain undefined between them for now, but he can remain comfortable in the knowledge that they’re all feeling the same. His father has been forced to stop training him and to be more cautious in his hero work, and his brother is reaching out to him again. He’s having a very good day.

———

Natsuo gets off the Shinkansen and heads up to street level. He’s meeting Shouto outside the restaurant, and they’ve chosen an expensive one that requires reservation, and in true Todoroki fashion, ordered a private room — though this is more to spend more of Endeavor’s money than to show off. Shouto’s in charge of swiping the card for the most part, just to avoid reminding Endeavor that Natsuo can visit the family; a little train ride to Musutafu is one thing, but charge after charge might actually get him to call...

Probably not, because Endeavor doesn’t tend to care about his purchases and likes to pretend he doesn’t exist, but it’s better not to test it.

In any case, Shouto had seemed plenty happy over their messages to be responsible for picking an expensive restaurant and swiping Endeavor’s beloved black credit card on a shopping day to spend as much of Endeavor’s money as possible. He’d started making plans right away, and Natsuo was all too happy to contribute.

They already had quite a few plans that were sure to make their father furious, if he ever found out of course. Most of the time, he didn’t really pay attention to whatever they brought; they all had their own cards in their own names and got their own copies of their statements. Natsuo was sure Enji got a copy too, of course; they were merely cardholders, but the bastard was so rich he just didn’t care. Natsuo remember going to his stupid fancy private school for high school and watching Endeavor open them and barely glance at it before throwing it away.

Shouto had said once in passing that he was told that he was told he was meant to inherit it all as the ‘masterpiece’ and Enji had said they were meant to live in luxury, not to worry about such things. They were to get anything they wanted, and they had people to worry about handling the rest.

Natsuo was not sure why their father bothered with receiving copies of the statements at all with such an attitude — perhaps to prove how in control he was of everything, like he always had to be.

Natsuo paused as he spotted his brother waving him down, dressed in what was probably a stupidly expensive cashmere sweater — of course, it was a little too warm for the damn thing, but the lucky bastard could simply keep himself ice cool whenever he wanted. Natsuo had to wear a fucking silk button up to keep cool and be dressed appropriately for such a stupidly fancy place. He couldn’t wait to take the damn thing off and switch into a regular t-shirt once they were done here — sure, he enjoyed the finer things in life like this, but now that he’d ran off to university and had fun being normal... or well, mostly normal, since it was a university were mostly rich students attended, and he was no exception, he found he preferred not dressing in fancy clothes — except cashmere.

Cashmere could always stay, because who didn’t like to wear cashmere?

“Shouto,” Natsuo grinned, and scooped his kid brother up in a hug. The boy went along with it — he never would’ve in the past, but it seems time has been good to him, or maybe his ‘friendships’ (he calls them that, but talks about them with such fondness and affection Natsuo suspects they’re something more.) have been kind to him. “It’s good to see you again.”

As he suspects, his little brother is cool to the touch.

“Natsu,” Shouto mumbles, and Natsuo is distinctly reminded of when they were little kids, before Touya... well. Before Endeavor took Shouto away from them, before Shouto had learned to shut them all out, before they were all separated, before it had gotten so bad, before Natsuo learned how to cover bruises with makeup. “I missed you too.”

“I’m sorry I was gone so long—”

“I’m not. You were safe, and you’re here now,” Shouto’s quick to cut him off, pulling away from the hug. “This is enough.”

He says it like it’s simple. Natsuo’s starting to understand it really is this simple to him.

“Let’s go inside,” Natsuo says with a shrug of his head to the side. “We don’t want to miss our reservation.”

Like they’d give away a reservation under the name Todoroki Shouto, especially when he was just on the podium of the UA Sports Festival and had made some fame of his own to go with Daddy Endeavor’s money? Natsuo knows full well there’s no worry — and Shouto probably knows this too, but Natsuo’s not so great at emotions, and he prefers to run away from them once he’s overwhelmed.

Shouto rolls with it and heads in. They don’t even ask his name — the hair’s always a giveaway in these circles, especially after his television debut. They greet him by name, and take them straight to a private room once they remove their shoes. They sit on zabuton, across from each other at the chabudai, and are served tea right away, probably something stupidly expensive and then marked up even more for no reason other than where they are. Natsuo doesn’t know — he’s never been a tea connoisseur, and he doesn’t care as long as the money’s coming out of his father’s deep pockets.

As they sip at their tea and are served sashimi of maguro, mirugai and ezo awabi, Natsuo asks Shouto how things are at UA. Shouto immediately starts smiling, talking about the two boys he was all over the Sports Festival with, expression bright and open in a way that Natsuo doesn’t remember him being since early childhood.

Shouto had talked about how their home, their father was destroying him, Natsuo, and it was true, it was — but he forgot to mention the damage it was doing to him too.

Watching him joyously talk about his favorite people as he called them — Natsuo was glad to see that his baby brother still could heal, that the damage wasn’t too great. Because yes, Natsuo had left, he had run and left Fuyumi and Shouto to Endeavor’s tender mercies as soon as he could go to university when he graduated, and he did not come back. He did not call. He did not text. He threw himself into his studies just like his father told him to and pretended he was never a part of the family at all.

But it was because Natsuo loved his siblings and because Natsuo knew he would be the next to have a shrine in Endeavor’s office if he didn’t leave. He still had nightmares about Touya — hell, he had nightmares that Shouto would go the same way.

But Shouto wasn’t following in Touya’s footsteps after all.

Shouto laughed and almost choked on a piece of appetizer sashimi that probably cost more than some people spent on groceries in a month and Natsuo knew that his brother was going to be okay, and that coming back into his life was the right choice.

———

“I’m Tachibana Mihoko with Channel9, and in today’s feel good news, Todoroki Shouto — you might recognize him as the third place winner of UA’s Sports Festival for the first-year competitors, as well as Number Two Pro Hero Endeavor’s son, was spotted out today making large donations of food, clothing and toys for children at several homeless shelters this afternoon. The shelters chosen in particular were shelters for those suffering due to Quirk discrimination.”

The reporter speaking into the microphone manages to look like an All Might advertisement — from her too big smile to the bright yellow hair and red and blue dress suit, but she knows what sells to the people these days, and it’s heroes, and that’s why she uses her hair-color changing Quirk to play up the theme! Clearly, it’s working, since someone chose her TV station to tip off with Todoroki Shouto’s next planned location.

“We’re outside one of the shelters now, hoping to catch a word with Todoroki about today’s good deeds!”

The camera pans over to video of Todoroki Shouto with his already famous red-and-white hair as he stands next to a man with white, spiked-up hair and they both point a few people with carts of items on where to go. The white-haired man beams brightly, rocking back on his heels as he claps Todoroki’s shoulder, congratulating him on a job well-done. Mihoko doesn’t hesitate and walks right over, cutting in between the two.

The white-haired man’s smile changes into something a little more devious, but Mihoko pays him no mind. He’s not what she’s here for, anyway.

“Good afternoon, I’m Tachibana Mihoko with Channel9; I was just hoping I could have a moment of your time to ask you a few questions about your humanitarian efforts today, Shouto — do you mind if I call you Shouto?”

For a split second, Mihoko thinks Shouto’s pretty face is going to twist in a grimace, but then his expression smooths out into something far more neutral and he inclines his head. “Not at all; I’d love to answer any questions you have.”

Behind her, the white-haired man snorts, clearly stifling laughter. Mihoko flips him off with a hand behind her back, but this simply makes it worse. She moves on to ignoring him instead.

“Thanks so much for your time, Shouto — we at Channel9 just wanted to know, what inspired you to support shelters for those suffering from Quirk discrimination today?”

“My father, Endeavor, asked me to do this for him today. It’s a cause we both believe in very deeply.” Shouto then proceeds to go into a very long and impassioned speech about fighting to stop Quirk discrimination, especially for the Quirkless. He mentions many times how grateful he is that his father raised him with such good morals.

Endeavor’s not really known for such things, so Mihoko wasn’t really expecting this answer, and just ends up blinking in surprise, unable to even try to get things back under control when the speech gets a little too long and out of hand. The white-haired man has long since walked away after the third or fourth mention of Endeavor supporting Quirkless rights and is practically on the ground laughing.

Finally, Shouto bows his head and thanks her for her time, then just walks away without another word. He nudges the white-haired man with his foot as he passes him and threatens to drag him away if he doesn’t pull himself together.

Mihoko is left feeling distinctly like she got played, but hey, she’s still going to get one hell of a raise from the boost in ratings they’re sure to get from getting such a big scoop on Endeavor and his kid, so what does she really care?

———

Shouto’s phone buzzes in his pocket incessantly as he strolls through the mall, arms laden with bags. He knows exactly who it is, after all, he sent the text to Endeavor letting him know to keep an eye on Channel9 news and Natsuo, as a relative unknown since their father had not paraded him around, sent the tip to the news channel — chosen specifically for their reporter with the All Might gimmick that Endeavor had complained about over dinner more than once.

If Endeavor is smart, and listens to his PR team, this’ll look good for him (which is a shame, but more’s the pity). Donating to an anti-discriminatory cause in a physical and visible way is only a good thing for a hero’s image and having his son speak highly of his morals was only a good thing for him too — but it would hurt Endeavor’s pride, so whether he called Shouto a liar later and said he didn’t approve of this and it was all Shouto’s own doing, (which was quite fine by Shouto) or not, he still was going to make sure to voice his anger.

Well, Shouto still wasn’t done spending time with his brother — and even if he were, he wasn’t in the habit of taking his father’s calls.

He quite happily ignored the vibration and swiped his card for another order for boba tea, once again ordering for everyone in the shop just to see if he could hit the card limit while Natsuo cheered him on — but regretfully, an order of tea for nine people, unsurprisingly, didn’t appear to cross any lines.

Still, he made sure to let everyone who wanted a selfie with him get one, his new Prada sunglasses balanced carefully on top of his head. Natsuo, with his own matching pair hanging carelessly off the front of his shirt laughed at him and just said he was glad not to be the famous brother — of course, they both know no one would be acting this excitable around Shouto if it weren’t for his recent win in the Sports Festival, combined with his news showing, and his free spending of the money...

All of which was deliberate — he was trending on Twitter, and that would most likely aggravate his father further. Natsuo was having a blast retweeting things on his hero-themed side account, and he’d apparently used this as an opportunity to snap a candid of Shouto and amass even more followers.

As they head out of the boba shop, Natsuo swings an arm around Shouto’s shoulders, grinning widely. “Do you want to get hoverboards? I don’t really know what I’d do with one, but they look cool and if they go to waste that’s Endeavor’s problem.”

Shouto shrugs. “Why not? The old man never did let us have any toys as a kid. I think we deserve some now.”

“Hey, that’s the spirit! We’re soothing our inner child today,” Natsuo says with a laugh.

They end up getting a lot more than hoverboards, but looking over their small hoard of various hero plushes and figurines as they take a table in the food court and eat an obscene amount of takeout, Shouto feels satisfied. He doesn’t think he’s ever just goofed off like this to this extent. The time he spends with Izuku and Hitoshi is more relaxed, and it’s fun and freeing too but this is something different.

There’s something about spending time talking about his righteous anger with a person who has been there with him — only Touya could understand better, and their father took him from them. Something about running around creating minor inconveniences and buying all the things their father always said they weren’t allowed to have.

It’s special with Natsuo, who knows what it was like when Endeavor was allowed to scream and hit and burn, because he understands. He carries his resentment and anger in similar ways to Shouto. He likes the implicit understanding, that Natsuo doesn’t encourage him to forgive and forget — Shouto loves his sister, of course, but he doesn’t want to give any of his softness to his father, any forgiveness to a man who has done nothing to earn it — even if his father did try, frankly, it would never be enough; it would never undo the damage done to him, to Natsuo, to Touya, to his mother, and to Fuyumi herself, though she often pretends to be unaffected in front of him, denies the damage done or downplays it.

He swallows his bite of soba, turns to his brother and smiles. “Hey, Natsu, let’s do this again sometime.”

And without a moment’s pause, Natsuo nods. “Definitely. I mean, that train ride’s not bad at all, after all — and you still haven’t introduced me to those boys of yours, and what kind of brother would I be if I missed out on teasing you in front of them?”

Shouto laughs, and shoves at Natsuo playfully before shoving a mouthful of soba in so he doesn’t have to reply. Natsuo laughs and teases him about his red ears, and Shouto feels like all is right in the world, right now.

Their family was broken... but perhaps not all was beyond repair after all.

Notes:

endeavor 100% ignored his pr team and said that the shopping spree for the the shelters was all shouto out of spite and sheer pettiness, and shouto is now a media darling who is 'just trying to help his family and the public'. natsuo is still retweeting shit and having a good time teasing shouto and cyberbullying endeavor

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