Chapter Text
Shit. Shit shit shit shit shit. These were supposed to last him till next Wednesday. He booked a refill for next Wednesday. They wouldn’t have them in sooner. Fuck.
Noel took a deep breath. He placed the empty pill bottle back on his desk. He could do this. A week without the antidepressants he had been on for the past 6 years. He would be fine. Right? His hands were shaking. God was he already having withdrawal symptoms? Another deep breath.
“I’m fine. I’m okay. It’ll be fine.” Noel said to himself in the mirror, his voice wavering as he broke eye contact with the boy in the mirror to start his day.
***
Three hours into the school day and Noel knew he couldn’t do it. He had excused himself to the bathroom 6 times to cry so far. He was a mess. His head hurt so much that he could barely see or hear. He wanted to be sick.
“Please don’t be sick.” He pleaded with himself.
Luckily, none of his first three lessons had his fellow choir members in with him so he could leave without an interrogation later.
Unluckily for Noel, someone entered the bathroom the exact moment he puked his guts into the toilet.
“That’s fucking disgusting.” The door opened and closed again, not that Noel was aware of it, he was too busy regurgitating his breakfast.
***
By the time choir rolled around at the end of the day, Noel had been sick another 4 times. The jackhammers in his head had tripled in size and pain.
The boy stumbled into the choir room 15 minutes late (he had to pit stop to puke on the way).
“How many times do I have to tell you guys to not be late? Honestly.” Ocean started to lecture as Noel dropped his bag and sat with the others.
“You okay poet?” Mischa asked next to him. Noel nodded, not trusting himself to speak without crying or barfing.
Thankfully, no-one questioned him too much, chalking it up to a stomach bug or whatever lie Noel told them. He could barely remember his cues at this point.
After choir finished, Mischa walked him out to his car.
“You alright driving?” Mischa asked tenderly. He cared about Noel. This pale look on his face worried Mischa.
“I’ll be fine Misch.” Noel replied with a supportive smile. “I’m really okay. You don’t have to worry.” Noel then said, seeing the look on Mischa’s face.
“I will still worry. Text me when you’re home okay.”
“I will.” Noel gave the taller boy a small kiss on the cheek then got in his car and drove home.
***
Noel >>> Mischa
im home
going to bed though
see you tmr
Mischa >>> Noel
remember to eat love
hope you feel better poet
я тебе люблю
Noel >>> Mischa
love you too
Noel didn’t sleep.
After 2 and a half hours of trying, Noel called it quits and went to go eat. As he sat up, Noel felt overwhelmingly dizzy. Then it all went black.
***
Noel groggily opened his eyes. When the fuck did he fall asleep? He glanced towards his clock.
It read 10:52
Shit. He slept in.
Mischa >>> Noel
you coming in today
you alrig poet?
im worried
please respond
Last one was sent 15 minutes ago.
Noel >>> Mischa
sorry slept in
feeling a bit better
will come in a bit later
Mischa >>> Noel
okay
see you soon poet
i love you
Noel >>> Mischa
i love you too
***
40 minutes later, Noel had managed to get out of bed and downstairs with minimal injury (he stubbed his toe on the bath then fell and bruised his elbow which caused him to pass out for a few minutes - not that he would admit it). Once in the kitchen, he saw a note from his mom that she had left that morning.
‘Had to go in early today, sorry love. See you tonight xx’
She’d been gone before he was even awake. Of course.
Opening the fridge for some juice, Noel felt an overwhelming dizziness.
When he opened his eyes, he was on the floor.
“Deep breaths Noel. Then get up.” And he did just that.
An hour and a half after he told his boyfriend he’d be in soon, Noel was in the car driving to school.
***
He got there at 13:17 according to the car radio. There was no point going in. He’d missed almost every lesson, only going to be there for lunch, geology and choir. But he told Mischa he’d be there, so here he was.
About the 50th deep breath today to prepare himself and Noel went in. He got a few curious looks from the office staff but luckily the one to ask questions was Mrs Lola, a woman who seemed to love Noel like a grandson.
“Noel, darling, you’re here!” She exclaimed, “Why were you late sweetie?”.
“I had a doctor's appointment.” Noel croaked, realising this was the first time he used his voice since he left school yesterday.
“Oh dear. You feeling alright hon?” Noel could only manage a weak nod before he moved to go find Mischa.
Mischa (as Noel guessed) was not in lesson. He was pacing in the choir room with Penny and Ricky - the only others who would dare miss a lesson.
Noel pushed open the creaking door, catching Mischa’s attention. The taller boy was in front of him in an instant, pulling him into a tight hug.
“I was worried, poet.”