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The best thing about having parents of different species is that Michael can enjoy both of the worlds.
Tubbo can give him the best experiences of the overworld while Ranboo can enjoy the best of what the nether can give, lava baths.
Piglins love to take baths, they're surprisingly clean creatures. Lava baths and dust rolling are highly appreciated.
Tubbo remembers Michael's first bath in water. The kid was flabbergasted, splashing around snorting and chuffing, eye dilating and enjoying the warm water like a mountain monkey in a term.
He remembers how long it took to take Michael out of the water, the piglet just getting out after the warmth began to fade. The kid was like a doll in his arms wrapped around in a towel and sleepy 'like baby Jesus' he said.
Ranboo was sad that they couldn't help with that and Tubbo made sure to reassure the enderman that they did enough already, both of them were still in the phase of fussing around the new baby.
Ranboo was just the parent that he expected, always worried out of their mind and crying with the little things, they holded Michael like he was made of glass.
Tubbo wasn't much behind, the paranoia not letting him sleep prefering to watch his son at night, a sword held close, he was just so scared that the kid would be taken from him or that he would just stop breathing. He couldn't bear losing Michael.
With time their family grew. Tommy was already there from the start, spending so much time at the mansion that it would be easier If he just moved in.
And with Tommy came Wilbur, which was not ideal, at least for Tubbo but he trusted Tommy and he wasn't a vulnerable child under Wilbur anymore, he could protect his family.
Then Philza met Michael, he admits it could have gone better, but it was undeniable that Michael was his grandson and Phil warmed up to him pretty quickly, reminiscing to a time when Technoblade was younger.
And then there's Technoblade. He wasn't on good terms with him, but he also wasn't on bad terms either. Techno was a sore topic, even though Ranboo trusted him and Michael adored the piglin, Tubbo still couldn't refrain from feeling scared, always tense and alert around the brute. A hand always on the sword clasped around his hip.
"Papa!"
He snaps out of his thoughts, looking over to Michael.
Oh
He remembers what he was going to do now.
Michael was completely covered in mud. He was sitting on a puddle and looking directly at his dad with a big smile. Tubbo would sigh If he wasn't the reason why the boy was here in the first place.
The brunette in question was also in the mud puddle, laying there sprailled. He thought It would be nice to play there with his son, pigs like mud afterall right?
He smiles back at his son who snorts at him, scooting closer.
Then, Michael slaps a muddy hoof on his beloved dad's face, making Tubbo yelp in surprise.
"Michael!" The ram scolds, trying to hold back a grin. He grabs at the little hoof, looking Michael directly in the eye. "Don't go around hitting people like that." He pauses, letting the kid take in the information. "Unless they deserve it, which then is fine." Ranboo wouldn't agree with that at all, but they aren't here now. Michael nods in understanding and giggles.
"Ok mud boy, let's go inside before your father comes home and sees us like this." Tubbos gets up, patting his pants in vain. Michael makes a sound of disagreement.
"C'mon kiddo, let's go home and take a bath. We can play in the mud another time." He extends his hand waiting for the piglet to grab it. Michael still doesn't look happy but he holds his dad's hand anyway, like a good boy. Tubbo smiles at that, he's educating his son well.
"If Ranboo catches us like that, I will never hear the end of it." Tubbo says for no one in particular, beginning to walk in the direction of Snowchester. Michael still grunts at him in response. "Yeah, your father doesn't like filth, does they? Not a trace of mud can be left on our bodies when we see them." He pokes at his son snout, making him snort and giggle.
Ranboo probably would come around soon for lunch. The enderman really didn't like filth. He more than once teased his spouse by trying to hug them when he was sticky in sweat and grime after working with machinery all day. The taller would act like he was trying to stab them, getting all fussed up and hissy.
He married a cat.
When Tubbo and Michael arrive home he doesn't even care about taking his shoes off, walking straight in, he could clean that later.
When he began to cross the entrance hall, footsteps stopped him in his tracks.
"Tubbo?" Fuck. "You're home? Welcome ba–" Ranboo appears from around the corner, freezing when their gaze meets with two mud covered figures inside their mansion.
"Hey honey." He Tries, opening the best smile he could muster. "Didn't know you were here, how are you babe?" Michael squeaks at his side, excitedly greeting his father, oblivious to the glare Ranboo was directing to his other dad.
"Don't 'babe' me." Well, he tried. "I– You know what? Just go. Now . Go take a bath and I mean It." Ranboo squints at Tubbo. "And Tubbo?"
The ram looks up at the enderman, opening an embarrassed smile.
"Yes honey?"
"Clean this mess after you're done."
"Yes honey."
Yeah so, not letting Ranboo know did not go as planned.
They walk past Ranboo, Michael oblivious about everything, smiling up at his father as they smile back softly at him and glare at their husband. He makes a point in brushing his muddy hand against his spouse's arm, smudging them a bit and making the enderman give an unholy screech in return.
Ranboo isn't actually mad at him, they're just not very fond of filth. But they would never get actually upset about that. The enderman starts to walk away, cleaning themself as both Michael and Tubbo giggles running up the stairs.
He really did marry a cat.
They quickly reach the bathroom, Tubbo closing the door behind him and taking off the muddy shirt, which began to feel uncomfortable against his skin. He helps Michael with his clothes before turning around to prepare their bath.
That was a mistake.
You see, Michael has a tendency of running around naked, you know, like toddlers do. Which is not ideal for the person trying to give him a bath.
And Tubbo forgot to lock the door.
When he turns around, Michael isn't there anymore and the door is open.
He gets up quickly, leaving the bathroom in a hurry to find his runaway mud boy. He sees the track of mud Michael left behind and groans with the thought of having to clean It up.
He hears a distant scream further in the mansion.
"WHAT THE FUCK!"
Oh great, Tommy is here.
He runs in the direction of the sound, seeing Tommy standing in the middle of the hallway, looking terribly confused and distraught. He runs past him to catch the little fugitive.
"What the– Tubbo! Why is there a naked pig running around the house!" He ignores Tommy completely.
"MICHAE! YOU BETTER COME BACK HERE!" He hears giggles and the sound of tiny hooves patting against the floor. "You little– MICHAEL!" He turns around a corner finding the little criminal, who screams and tries to get away again.
This time Tubbo doesn't let him run far, catching up to the piglet and grabbing him from behind in a bear hug. The kid screams and laughs kicking his tiny little hooves in the air.
"Oh my god, look at the mess you've made…" Tubbo looks behind them, seeing the track of mud left in their path. "I will put you in a pan and turn you into supper." He looks down at his son, who only laughs at his face. Little shit. "You're a menace." He doesn't let Michael go when he begins to walk back to the bathroom.
Tommy is still standing in the corridor confused, right where he left him. Ranboo is standing next to him, probably came to see what was going on, looking at all the mess with disgust. He knows the taller is laughing internally at the work Tubbo will have cleaning all of that up.
"So your child has the habit of running around naked?" Tommy questions.
"He is a free spirit." Ranboo responds grinning at Tubbo's suffering. Tubbo squints at him. Michael is distracted by staring at Tommy's hair, he loves the golden locks.
"Yeah, don't make me mention the nether incident." That immediately makes Ranboo shiver, memories of running around the nether with only a sword and a towel to protect their dignity strucking their mind.
"We don't talk about the nether incident."
"What the fuck are you talking about?" Tommy looks between them. "You guys are weird and you are disgusting, go put on some clothes." The blonde points at Tubbo, who just now remembers that he's lacking a shirt.
Michael laughs, babbling at Tommy and the blonde grins at the kid's excitement.
"Sorry that you can't deal with such an incredible sight in front of you, bossman." He winks at him and Tommy gives a disgusted scow pushing past Ranboo.
"Fuck you both, I was going to fetch Shroud and bless you with their presence but now I think I will stay at home, washing my eyes out." The youngest teen rants walking away.
"Sure Tommy, make sure to bring warm clothes for you both." Ranboo responds waving at the teen. Tubbo laughs.
Tommy flips them off.
When the blond disappears around the corner, Ranboo turns to their husband and son again.
"Gold..." Michael says sadly, word leaving his mouth with difficulty. Michael was still learning to speak common.
"Yes Michael. Uncle Toms is leaving for now but he will be back later, yeah?" Tubbo responds softly. Michael nods slowly, looking at the spot Tommy was. Ranboo chuckles.
"Don't worry baby, he will come back soon." The enderman reassures. "Now please go clean yourselves." They urge both of them. "And Michael." Ranboo bends down, looking at the piglet. "Be a good boy and don't make your dad go gray at the age of 17." Michael giggles at that, nodding.
"You're going to make us age faster, kiddo."
"I think I can see a string of gray hair here, Bo."
"Oh no, I don't want to be old like Phil!"
Ranboo laughs and Michael follows suit snorting.
"Ok, now go take a bath, mud boys." The enderman muses.
"Aw, I don't even get a kiss goodbye?"
"No."
"Aw c'mon, just a little kiss of encouragement." He makes kissy noises at the taller, getting on his tippy toes and they step back away from him. Michael is laughing in his hold.
"Go get clean or you better not expect me to get close to you again." Ranboo grins mouthing 'couch' to the ram.
And just like that Tubbo is hurrying to the bathroom in a second. He can hear Ranboo laughing behind him. He can't help but smile.
When they get to the bathroom again, this time Tubbo locks the door shut behind him before setting Michael down.
"You heard you father. We better get this over with or there will be no kisses for us." He says and Michael agrees.
The bath goes fine, they play around with the bubbles and the bathtub toys. Michael puts bath foam in his dad's head and Tubbo makes a shampoo mohican on the piglet's fur in return. He lets Michael help with scrubbing his horns and washing his back. He cleans between the younger hooves, making him laugh with the tickles and then Tubbo leans back in the tub, his son leaning against his chest. They relax for a while with the water warming their bodies.
When they finish, Tubbo helps the piglet with drying off and wrapping his shark hood towel around him. He does the same with himself, wrapping his towel around his waist and picking up Michael to head out. They leave the bathroom with a puff of hot steam.
They get ready at Michael's room after Tubbo gets his clothes from his and Ranboo's room. The older gets dressed first in a white button up and black trousers, before dressing Michael up in a bee jumper and brown shorts.
"There you go." The ram says proudly, smudging some baby cologne at the piglet's neck and wrists. "Gotta smell nice for us, don't ya?" He makes a point in nuzzling Michael's neck, holding him close. The piglet giggles, holding Tubbo's horns.
"Nobody can resist the baby smell." He gives a loud kiss on his boy chubby cheek, before getting back to fixing Michael's inner shirt collar to neatly rest outside the jumper.
His son is so cute, sometimes he wishes Michael stays like this forever. His baby.
Michael reaches for him and he leans closer, letting the boy take his face between his little hooves.
"Dada!" The piglet exclaims squeezing his cheeks. "Pweaty!"
He looks confused for a moment. "Pretty?" Michael squeaks in agreement, nodding fervorously. His heart warms. "I'm pretty?" His son opens a big smile at him agreeing excitetelly.
His son said that he looks pretty.
He can't take the dumb smile off of his face.
"Then you!" He exclaims holding the piglet by the middle. "Little man. Is the cutest baby alive!" He lifts him up above his head, a burst of childish giggles erupting in the room.
"Coote!"
"Yes. Yes, you! My little man." He muses, bringing Michael down to nuzzle at his belly. "My baby, my little baby man, so cute." Michael grabs at his dad's horns beaming and laughing, his personal sunshine. He kisses his son's cheek. "I love you, kiddo." He doesn't even register the words leaving his mouth.
"Luv' e u" Michael babbles back snorting and chuffing, connecting his little snout with his croocked ram nose. He nuzzles back; he knows it's a form of showing affection between piglins.
"Yeah, kiddo." He can feel his chest so full and warm. "We better get down, before your father thinks that it's a good idea to cook lunch for themselves." The piglet immediately shrinks with the thought, he laughs. "Yeah, their cooking is bad, but we will not tell them that, will we?" He pokes at his son's snout, not really getting a response for that before starting to get out of the room.
They head downstairs making a beeline to the kitchen to find Ranboo.
They're there, leaning against a counter with their back turned to them, tapping on their communicator, not noticing their arrival.
Tubbo grins, putting his finger against his lip as he silently sits Michael on his high chair, making his son hold his mouth with both hands, muffling the giggles. The ram walks behind the enderman silently.
"Boo!" Tubbo hugs Ranboo from behind, the enderman letting out an airy laugh as they hold the hands wrapped around them.
"Oh! you got me." They fake scare.
"You heard me coming."
"Did I?"
"Dickhead." Ranboo turns around facing Tubbo. The ram doesn't let go of his spouse's waist, leaning his chin against their chest. "I hope you haven't started making lunch without me." He hums.
"Oh, I would never." The enderman props their arms on the shorter's shoulders, their hands relaxing behind his neck.Tubbo doesn't really like the height difference right now.
"You're too far."
"Oh?"
"Get down." He tugs at their waist making Ranboo chuckle. "Don't laugh, you dick. Just get over here." He tugs again and the enderman gives in, leaning down at his level until their noses are almost touching.
"Hello." Ranboo giggles.
"Hi, come here often?"
"Uhm, not really, but I could start to."
The couple chuckles.
"I think you owe me something." The ram whispers.
The enderman hums. "Do I?"
"Yes. You said you were going to give me something after I took a bath."
"Uhm… I don't remember that."
Tubbo groans, throwing his head back in false frustration. Ranboo chuckles, a small smile tugs at the brunette lips.
When Tubbo looks at his spouse again, their eyes are full of sentiment, looking at him with so much love and happiness it makes Tubbo pause. He feels a little tug at the back of his neck pulling him forward before their lips connect. It's a sweet and soft kiss.
He always liked the taste that Ranboo leaves in his mouth. 'Chorus fruit' they explained after he pointed that out and never elaborated further.
The couple get interrupted by a loud squeak coming from behind. They break the kiss looking at the source, gazing at a small piglet bouncing up and down on a high chair.
Michael excitelly squeaks and shrieks, hitting his hooves against the table and looking at his parents, obviously wanting something.
"Oh, Someone wants attention." Tubbo laughs and Michael squeaks again, demandingly.
"Oh baby, of course I wouldn't forget your kiss." Ranboo runs to the piglet, picking him up and covering the little face with kisses.
The kid laughs, taking in all the affection with great joy and giving high short screams as Ranboo bends down still holding their son, nuzzling his face.
"Papa!" The piglet exclaims crackling, still held almost backwards by an affectionate enderman taking in his smell.
"I love this baby smell." Ranboo stands up correctly again, holding Michael properly and giving him a last kiss on the chubby cheek. "And I love you." They purr against his skin.
The kid giggles, turning his attention to the black and white hair, playing with the strands happily. The enderman looks at their husband who is silent, only watching them lovingly.
Ranboo smiles at him and he smiles back making the enderman's heart jump. They walk to their husband, bending down to give him a quick kiss. Then, the couple give a conjoint kiss on Michael's cheeks to not let him out.
The piglet laughs and giggles, chuffing. Safe in the hold of his family, his sounder.
The rest of the day goes calmly.
As calm as having Tommy and two children running around the mansion could get.
When the night comes the teens make sure the children are clean, which goes as expected. With two kids running around the house buttnaked instead of one. Turns out Michael can be a bad influence on Shroud.
When the mission Flight Risk Bath, FRB, was complete the boys got tucked in a bed together. A request made by Shroud who wanted to sleep with their cousin.
The teens make sure their kids were sleeping before crashing down on the sofa. They watch a film together until eventually Tommy falls asleep, leaning against a sleepy Tubbo and Ranboo decides it's time for them to go to bed.
If Ranboo got woken up in the middle of the night by a blonde teen, to fit in the enormous bed with the married couple they didn't say.
Snowchester was warm that night.
