Chapter Text
The court’s a flurry of activity that Buck doesn’t understand. They’re asking Abby questions, questions she can’t either answer or seem to understand. He thought he’d be happy seeing Abby’s incompetence as a mother showing for everyone to see, but he hates it. He hates it.
He doesn’t love her anymore, wasn’t sure he ever really did, but he hates doing this to her. He hates that she put them in this position where he had to, and he hates what it’s doing to his daughter. Her mother should know her favorite color, her middle name. She should know how she likes her pancakes, how she prefers chocolate milk over regular milk, and how she’s obsessed with dinosaurs and princesses equally because “everyone deserves equal attention, Daddy!”
He answers their questions dutifully, almost numbly. He didn’t want to be doing this, but he knew he had to, and so he kept his eyes on his daughter’s bright, blue eyes and kept taking deep breaths. He wishes Eddie were here. This would be so much better if Eddie were here; maybe he wouldn’t feel like his heart was pounding out of his chest.
He watches as they put his daughter on the stand, watches as she practically shakes in her chair, asking who she wanted, and he can’t deny the thrill he gets when she tells him she wants to stay with him.
Custody is in the bag, Abby gets visitation based on what he thinks is wise, and he leaves. Angry. Angry that he’s been put in this position yet again.
He doesn’t want to give Abby his daughter, and he knows if he did, somehow, she’d flake, like she always does.
He lets Lia into their house, Maddie is going to drop off Chris, and he locks himself into his room after feeding his girl.
He needs a shower. He needs a fucking shower, he can’t keep going without a shower.
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The water becomes cold eventually and his fingers pruny, but Buck can’t bring himself to get out just yet. He’s not clean, he’s not safe, he has to stay.
He feels the warmth at the back before he hears the bitten-off curse that Eddie always says when he’s too cold. Eddie hates being cold. But there’s no more hot water, it’s been gone for a while now. He isn’t sure how long it has been, though.
“She’s ours,” Eddie tells him, wrapping his arm around his shoulder. “She’s ours now. No one can take her away.”
“No one was going to take her away,” Buck says, a stark contrast from what he was saying last night, but he knew that now. No one was going to take her away. Abby just wanted a picture perfect family but Buck loves Lia. Buck would die for Lia. Abby couldn’t give Lia what she needed, she never could. She’s never been able to.
“You okay?” Eddie asks.
“Pissed,” is all Buck has the energy to say and Eddie nods, like he understands. “Just wanna stay here.”
“Alright baby, we’ll stay here. We’ll stay here as long as you need too.”
And they do. Even under the freezing cold water.
