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Crowley grumbled, putting his phone down with a huff, deciding that it absolutely didn't have any useful information for him.
Now both frustrated and bored, the demon made an executive decision; get into his angel's lap and forget about the world for a while.
So, he stood from the couch, letting out a soft sigh as his joints cracked in protest. He slithered from the couch to Aziraphale's armchair, where the angel was currently reading some book that Crowley didn't really care about.
Carefully, the demon nudged the book in a way he knew would get Aziraphale to take one hand away, and when that was done, he flopped down and wiggled his way into hugging the angel, letting out a pleased hum when he was encased in said angel's arms as he continued his reading, probably only half aware that he now had a clingy, subby demon in his lap.
Crowley buried his nose into Aziraphale's neck, taking in a deep breath that smelled of cocoa and old books and baked goods, and let his mind wander.
It wasn't that he didn't like sex. He did, it caused pleasurable sensations and it came with a strong sense of intimacy that he reveled in.
So, yes, he liked sex. Sex with Aziraphale, at least. But that… that didn't have to mean he felt attracted to the angel, did it?
He had gotten aroused by something Aziraphale did before- mostly by the angel eating. And while he still enjoyed watching Aziraphale eat, he didn't get the same feelings he did before. Arousal had softened into simple happiness and pride for having made his angel happy.
In the current day, Crowley really only felt aroused when the situation specifically called for it. He hardly even made the Effort anymore, really.
Would the idea of having his head between those thick thighs get him off? Probably. But he didn't really find himself drawn to those kinds of fantasies anymore. He much preferred daydreaming about using said thighs as his pillow, soft and squishy as they were.
So, the question had popped into his head, and he couldn't get it to leave- was he asexual?
He enjoyed it when they had sex, sure, but was that because he specifically wanted to have sex, or was it because of the pleasure and closeness that came with it?
It was a confusing line of thought, and it had given him migraines on multiple occasions. He wanted to just say 'fuck it' and leave the mess that was his sexuality without a label, but that idea had quickly flown out the window at his inability to just stop thinking about it.
He whined frustratingly, not really realizing he was making the sound.
Even still, a hand started to run through his hair in response, followed by a quiet, "Are you alright, love?"
"Mmmhmmm," the demon hummed, one again taking in a large breath to relish in the angel's scent, "Juss' thinkin' a bit too much 'bout sssomething don't wanna think 'bout."
"Would talking about it help?" Aziraphale's voice was soft, comforting. Crowley wanted to drown himself in it.
"Mmmm… dunno. Kinda perssonal. All 'bout me and my viewsss on… thingss." He was being vague, but only half on purpose. Yes, he was a little scared of what the angel would think if he just blurted out that he might be ace, but he also knew that it wouldn't really be a problem.
"Oh, well, it couldn't hurt to try, could it?" Aziraphale said, scratching Crowley's scalp lightly, his book long forgotten.
"I mean… maybe," the demon squirmed slightly, not entirely sure about spilling his sexuality crisis to his dominant.
"I won't make you if you don't want to, darling," Aziraphale soothed, "but it might help. Especially with you so deep in subspace right now."
"Oh, ok," Crowley murmured, "If you really want to know."
"I do," the angel confirmed, letting the hand that used to hold his book lay in the small of Crowley's back, "Anything that has you upset enough to invade my space while I'm reading and then continue to be frustrated is something I want to know about."
Crowley blushed, trying to hide himself even further in Aziraphale's neck.
He had already begun thinking of a plan on how to come out to the angel when he first started questioning sexuality- he would make sure he wasn't in or in any danger of falling into subspace, maybe even taking off his collar for good measure, and then he would sit on the bookshop couch and bring it up subtly over a bottle of wine. The plan was tasteful and easy and most importantly, left a good way to back out if anything went wrong.
What he ended up doing, however, had none of those things, because as he thought about words and their stupidity, he simply blurted:
"I think I might be ace."
Aziraphale's hand stopped combing through his hair for a slight moment, probably because the angel was processing his words, but before Crowley could get insecure and wave the idea off, it had started back up again.
"By ace you mean asexual, yes?" Aziraphale murmured, voice accepting and soft and proud.
"Mmm… yeah," the demon replied, shifting uncomfortably. "I… I've been. Thinking. And… while I do enjoy it when we, y'know," he was still shy around the words, sometimes, despite thinking them so plainly in his head, "I don't… I don't know if I have that… that same desire that others do. I like how it feels when you touch me, or when I touch you, and it's so intimate and makes me feel so taken care of, but…" he whined again at his lack of wording capabilities as he trailed off. Why was this so confusing?
After a few seconds, Aziraphale spoke, "Do you want to know what I think, dearest?"
After receiving a small nod, he continued, "I think that if you identify with the label, you can use it," the hand on the demon's back started to rub up and down it, "no matter how you feel about the act of sex itself. And if you want anything to change between us, I'll be sure to comply, and if you want nothing to change at all, you are still completely valid in your assessment of your identity."
Crowley whimpered, clutching at the back of the angel's waistcoat where he was holding it.
Aziraphale was right, of course, and he was basically just parroting what the demon had read on hundreds of forums anyways, but hearing it from him somehow made it all real.
And he was so accepting, offering to change whatever was necessary for Crowley to be comfortable. It was freeing.
"I don't think… I don't think I want anything to change," he mumbled, still slightly unsure, "but… I think. I think I am asexual. Is that… is that ok?"
"Why wouldn't it be?" Aziraphale responded to the question with his own, pressing a light kiss to the demon's head, "I don't really care about your sexuality, darling, and if you so wished, I would still be perfectly content with pure celibacy."
The demon shuddered at that thought, "How about we don't go that far?"
The angel chuckled, lightly massaging a knot he had found in Crowley's shoulder.
"Whatever you want, dearest."