Archive of Our Own ^beta

Four had just been trying to relax. It was a nice, sunny day. The chain had been relaxing in a small clearing, taking the time to wash up in the river.

The other colors had finally shut up. Green, controlling the body, was taking a moment to lay in the sun. He could hear Wind, Sky, and Hyrule talking a few meters away.

All was well. The smell of the forest. The sounds of the river flowing smoothly and—

“FUCK” screamed Wind.

Four’s eyes flung open as he reached for a weapon that wasn’t there. He whipped around to see—

No monster. No threat of any kind. Wind was talking casually to Rulie and Sky like he hadn’t just screamed at the top of his lungs. Hyrule looked slightly pale. Sky was staring at Wind, eyebrows raised so high in shock that they were hidden behind his hair.

What the fuck was that?  Blue cursed.

I have no clue. Vio said weakly.

Red laughed hysterically.

Green, still in control, flopped over onto his stomach and groaned.

He just wanted a damn break.

These heroes are going to give me grey hair, Four thought miserably.

.△

Time and Legend burst into the clearing. Their weapons were drawn and a look of alarm was etched on both their faces. Alarm changed very quickly to confusion as they took in the sight in front of them. Four was sprawled starfish style face down on the ground. Hyrule and Sky were staring at Wind in shock. Wind chattered away happily, seemingly unaware of their gazes.

Time and Legend stopped in their tracks and exchanged looks— What the shit?

They approached the group.

.△

“H—hi Time! Hi Legend!” Wind greeted them cheerfully. Sky gave a wave. Hyrule just glanced at them.

“Hello,” Time said.

Legend just says, “What the fuck was that, sailor?”

Wind’s grin widened. Hyrule and Sky groaned in perfect synchronization.

“That’s my technique!” Wind chirped.

“For what?” Legend asked, right when Time deadpanned, “Your technique.”

“For fluency,” Wind said, nodding.

“What happened to the breathing?” Time joked.

Wind shrugged innocently, “Wasn’t working.”

Time raised an eyebrow.

Wind huffed, “Okay. I didn’t actually try, but,” he said, “I didn’t tap!”

Legend, Sky, and Hyrule looked completely lost.

“That’s good,” Time praised, “But was it completely necessary to, you know, scream?”

Wind nodded gravely. (It didn’t really work, considering the huge grin on his face.)

“Can you explain what you’re talking about?” Legend demanded.

Time shrugged, “Apparently, screaming profanities helps him speak more fluently.”

Legend just stared at them.

“Maybe don’t use that technique?” Sky suggested timidly, “I think you broke Hyrule,” he glanced over behind himself, “And Four.”

Wind hummed, smirked, “No promises!” he sang.

Four sighed loudly into the grass. Hyrule buried his eyes into his hands.