Chapter Text
So much was firing through Rey’s brain that she couldn’t begin to untangle her thoughts. She was kidnapped, She is chained up in a basement. Her kidnapper is her patient Kylo. But his name is actually Ben. Ben has killed people. Wants to keep killing people. But he doesn’t want to kill her. She wants him to do therapy with her. None of this made sense.
“Save you?” She repeated dumbly, trying to get her brain to catch up with her situation.
“I don’t want this compulsion anymore. This darkness. But this is the only way to do it. And as soon I saw you, I knew you would be the one to do it. That’s why I brought you here. Not to hurt you, like the others. But to work with you.” He was serious. Oh God, he was terribly serious. But if he wanted to get help maybe he would listen to other, less criminal, options.
“Ben, if you’re hurting people there are places you can go,” She tried. “People who can make sure you don’t hurt anyone ever again. Teams of therapists. Not prisons, hospitals where someone can be with you 24/7. Real professionals. You will get the help you need. I know some good places, and I interned for a wonderful one. It’s close, maybe thirty minutes away. We can go together. I will get you set up with the best doctors. If you unchain me I’ll drive us right there and no one else will get hurt.” Ben looked away, his jaw flexing. Rey took an instinctive step back.
“I’m not going to the nut house and I’m not going to prison,” he said, the anger building in his voice. “I’m staying here and so are you.”
“Kylo if you want a therapy session with me, we need to go back to my office.” He was delusional. Delusional people could be reasoned with if you used their own logic. She slowly put down the lamp on the floor and tried to stand relaxed. It took lots of deep breaths, trying to stop her hands from shaking so hard. She spoke calmly, clearly, and with authority. “I don’t want to give up on you. I didn’t lie. But to help you I need my things, my books, my resources. Let’s go back to school and we can have a session right now.”
“No. Stop asking.” Ok. He was getting frustrated and it was time to stop pushing him for the moment.
“Ok,” Rey said, holding up her hands to try and calm him down. “We don’t have to go anywhere. We can stay right here. You are in charge. I’m just trying to-"
“Help me. I know. And I know how you’ll help me.”
“By doing therapy here. That’s what the chairs are for, right?” She gestured behind her. Her voice was horribly high and wobbly. If she broke down, would he just kill her instead? “That’s really good. You’ve been thinking about this for a while now. Wanting to be better. That’s a good start. You didn’t just do this on a whim, right?” He shook his head.
“No. I didn’t. I’ve been looking for the perfect person to help me for a long time. I told you in our session. Seven therapists over several months. I didn’t lie to you. I never lied to you.”
“No, I believe you. It’s very important that we do not lie to each other. Without trust, we can’t get any work done.”
“Can we sit down?” He asked abruptly.
“Sure, Ben. We can sit.” Probably antisocial, she noted. Obviously crazy, just what breed of it? They sat in the chairs facing each other, her chain dragging behind her. She shifted in it, trying to get comfortable. An impossible task, of course. How could this even start? All she could focus on were his hands. When would he wrap them around her neck? When would he bash her brains in? What wrong word or movement would make him finish this insane experiment?
“You’re shaking,” he noted. Rey looked down at her own hands and tried to will them to stop shaking.
“I am,” she confirmed. Her throat tightened up and her voice began cracking slightly. “I’m very scared. When you tell someone you’ve killed before it can frighten them.”
“Oh.” He took this information in slowly, turning it over in his head. “This probably won’t work if you’re scared.”
“No! It will!” Her voice jumped an octave and she trembled harder. She needed to get ahold of herself, fast. “It will, Ben, I promise. I just need a minute. I need… I need…” Her breathing started coming in rapid gulps, close to hyperventilating. He stood up She was going to die, she was going to die, she was-
“I’ll be back. I know this is scary. And it won’t work if you’re scared. It has to work.” He stood and she flinched hard, sure he was going to attack her now. Her hands flew to her face to protect them, but when she slowly moved them down she saw he had moved to crouch in front of her. Frighteningly close, but less intimidating. “I’m not going to hurt you. I swear. I don’t break promises. And I know you won’t either. But you have to do your part.” He stood up, leaving her curled into the chair. “I’ll be back in an hour. Maybe more. I’ll bring lunch. Something for your head, too. The sink water is ok to drink if you’re thirsty, but I’ll bring some water bottle cases down here soon. I left them in the trunk of my car. Under the bed there are some extra blankets if you get cold. Tonight I’ll get your clothing sizes and I can go out and buy some stuff. When I come back we’ll start our first session.” Her eyes filled with tears, the immediate danger of being murdered fading to the realization he had a plan to keep her here for a very long time. A few slipped out of her eyes and his jaw tightened. “Don’t cry. I don’t… I don’t like it when they cry.” She wiped her face quickly, filing that away as extremely important information.
“Please,” she tried again, standing on knocking knees and desperately trying to keep herself from sobbing. Because it could end in her dying in this basement. “People will be looking for me. My family will try and find me, and you won’t get the help you need. Just let me out before this gets worse, I’m begging you.” He cocked his head to the side, furrowing his brows.
“I won’t lie to you, but you also can’t lie to me. That’s very important.” She shook her head so hard and fast it almost gave her a headache.
“I d-didn’t. I didn’t lie.”
“You don’t have a family waiting for you,” he said simply and turned to leave up the stairs. Him unlocking the door was too much for her and she bolted towards him, even if she knew she couldn’t actually make it. He seemed only slightly startled by the display, stuck only a few steps away from him and reaching her hand towards him as far as it could go.
“Ben, don’t leave me down here. We can keep talking about it, find a better solution, just don’t leave me here Ben!” She continued shouting his name as the one exit shut and locked behind him. She couldn’t bang on the door so she hit the cement wall over and over and screamed until her voice couldn’t take it anymore.
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The muffled sounds from the basement were easy enough to ignore. He was used to tuning it out. They always screamed and begged, but usually, they were bound much tighter. The chain he gave her was a kindness. It barely even restrained her. He needed her to be comfortable. That was very important. With the others, comfort was not a consideration. He went into the kitchen and tried to pick out something for her to eat. Something light, her stomach would probably be sensitive. People tend to vomit when they get scared, he had learned that lesson many times. But it would still be high quality, so she knew he would be treating her well.
She had to get the idea that he would kill her out of her head. He had no intention of harming the person who could help him. What a hassle it would be to find someone else if he did. He began slicing a loaf of bread for a sandwich, thinking about his new resident. He wondered if she would refuse to treat him when she came back. If she would scream and cry and just would carry on like the rest of them… He shuddered. No. She was smart. Very smart. She would know that there was no way out of this.
After what happened to her parents, her heart was open to anyone who needed help. All they had to do was ask. She said so many times across her social media. Two drunks who couldn’t be bothered to raise their only daughter and wrapped themselves around a tree when she was ten. He hated drunks. His first kill was a drunk. But she and him saw the world differently. He saw two idiots who were too consumed with their own needs to take care of their child. She saw two angels who didn’t have the resources they needed to get better. He had hardly spent a day with her and he could tell she was a person who saw the good in everyone. In everything. She could see the good in him. She would know what to do. She just needed to adjust. Yes, an hour or so would do it.
He grabbed some chicken stock and vegetables to make soup with. While he cut vegetables, he looked out to window onto the quiet suburban street. He liked the quiet. It helped take the edge off. Dogs, kids, nice and quiet people who kept to themselves. When he moved here, he felt like he could kick this urge without help. For a few months, he did. But then Poe moved into the neighborhood. He could see him now, walking his white dog and whistling. Always whistling. Smiling too wide, his teeth practically glowing out of his mouth. And he was loud, so loud all the fucking time. His windows were thick, but he could still hear the man chattering on and on to some neighbor about his latest flight. The amazing feats he had completed, the narrow escapes. Ben gripped the knife cutting carrots in a white hot grip. Of course, he was a pilot. He hated drunks, pilots, and rude, cocky pricks. The first day he met Poe was when Ben was walking to his car one morning.
“Hey, you’re the Solo kid, right?” He had asked, his dog yapping beside him.
“Sure,” Ben said, trying to ignore him, trying to dig his key out of his pocket.
“I just moved in. You know, I’m a big fan of your-”
“Excuse me,” Ben said brusquely. Begging him to take the hint. “I’m late for class.”
“Class? Still in school?” Ben didn’t answer, finally fishing his key out and unlocking the door. His hand was trembling slightly. He hated people who couldn’t take a hint. Stupid, self-important, careless- “…and get your sunscreen too!”
“What?” Ben snapped. He had stopped listening for a moment.
“Sunscreen,” Poe repeated, chuckling at his joke. Ben looked up.
“Cloudy,” he said. Was he blind as well?
“Pale guys like you need sunscreen no matter what the weather is, right?” Poe laughed again and his dog yapped and Ben gripped the door handle so hard he wouldn’t have been surprised if it had broken off in his hand. Ben didn’t reply but climbed into his car and slammed the door behind him.
“It was just a joke!” Poe had called after him, but it was too late. The darkness inside of him was growing, whispering in his ear. Telling him the world would be better without someone like him. This time he tried to push the voice down and away. Told the voice he came to this suburb to try and stop the compulsion, to quiet the darkness. But it wouldn’t go away.
He looked away from Poe in his yappy dog, turning on the stove to simmer the vegetables and noodles. He left the kitchen and turned on the television to watch the news. He always kept one eye on it in case something about his victims appeared. It hasn’t happened yet, but you never know. Rose, a girl from a few of Rey’s Instagram photos he learned, had texted her a few times. Never asked how she was or where she was, just fishing for gossip. Once he got Rey’s password he would text her back, complaining of an illness that would confine her to bed for at least a week. Then he would smash the device with a hammer.
The sounds from the basement had quieted considerably. He wondered what she was doing down there and briefly wondered if he should install a camera to watch her when he was gone. He shook the idea out of his head. No, she was a professional. She deserved privacy when they weren’t together when she wanted to dress or shower. He wasn’t some pervert, after all.
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When Ben came back down the stairs with a tray of food, Rey had managed to pull herself together. Crying would not help her. Screaming would not help her. She had already done plenty of both since he had left and it hadn’t done her a lick of good. She was smaller than him and she could not find anything that would help her break the chain. She was stuck. And he was right, there was no family that would be looking for her. Friends would try, but she couldn’t count on casual college friends to save her life. No, there was only one thing she could use to get out. Her smarts. And she had plenty of them.
“That looks good, Ben. Thank you.” She spoke evenly, and professionally. Like he was a real client. It was important to compliment them on their positive attributes, but not overdo it with false praise. Never lying, even by exaggeration, is a basic tenant of therapy. Most clients already had trust issues and breaking that trust could ruin the relationship. And this relationship could not be ruined. He set the tray on the small table. A sandwich, some soup, and an ice pack.
“Are you hungry?” He asked. He looked at her face carefully, looking for something. Rejection, maybe. She shook her head.
“My stomach is a little upset.” She touched the bruise on her forehead without thinking, wondering if he had given her a concussion. He quickly snatched up the squishy blue pack and handed it to her.
“Here. This should help.” She touched it to her head, letting it somewhat numb the spot. But the pain was deep.
“Thank you, Ben. That’s very thoughtful.” She looked for a reaction, a puff of pride or a look of shame. He gave a small shoulder shrug and that was all.
“So we can start first and eat after?” Rey nodded and took a step forward, lowering her cold pack. As her chain jingled, she swallowed hard. Now or never.
“You know, Ben,” she began gently. “You don’t need all this.” She gestured to the silver metal pooled around her feet.
“I do,” he said. “But it’s long enough to go anywhere in here if you want to walk around during the day.” ‘Oh boy I can walk to the bathroom and back to the bed,’ Rey thought.
“Ben, you brought me here for my work. I can’t work like this.”
“The chain is around your ankle, not your mouth,” he replied. “You’re going to run away if I don’t have it.”
“I understand that you might feel this way,” she continued carefully. It was amazing how fast her mind could snap into ‘therapist mode’ even under intense stress. “But let’s think through this. You’re much bigger and stronger than me, right?”
“Yes.”
“And the door is locked. Even if I could get to it, I can’t open a locked door. So this is really unnecessary to have. And to work with each other we need to trust each other. Taking the chain off would be a show of trust between us and would help us get off on the right foot. I told you I would help you. And I want to do that. But we can’t make productive change here when we don’t trust each other.” Ben took this in, looking at her carefully. After a few moments, he pulled out a small key from his back pocket and unlocked the chain. Rey let out the breath she didn’t know she was holding. “Thank you, Ben. I really appreciate that.” She hated how she still couldn’t shake a small tremor in her voice.
“I’m going to put it back on when I leave,” he said, putting the key back. “And I really don’t want to have to fight if you try to attack me. I don’t want to hurt you but I could on accident.”
“I understand, Ben. It’s good to hear that you’re concerned for my safety. And this is a good step towards trust between us. And I know we can build a relationship on that. But I have to ask one more time. Please. We can go to my office right now and talk as long as you want about whatever you want. This is not the best way to handle the issues you are having.” Ben furrowed his eyebrows and for just a moment she believed that he was considering it. Then he stood and walked over to the bedside table and pulled out a notebook and a sparkly blue pen. Her notebook and her sparkly blue pen, she realized as her stomach turned. He had taken her bag. Her phone, her laptop, things that could help her escape. He handed it to her and sat in his chair across from the one he wanted her to take.
“We’re starting now,” he said with an air of finality. She wanted to start screaming again, beat him with her fists until he let her out, sob about how this wasn’t fair, that she wasn’t even a real therapist according to the state of New Hampshire, that she didn't deserve to be trapped like an animal. But she took a breath and sat down in the chair.
Rey knew had exactly two options to get out of here. One, she convinced him to stop killing, to stop listening to the darkness inside of him or whatever the hell he thought was controlling him. After she did that, she could let him believe turning himself in was the best course of action to right his wrongs. They would walk out together and into the police station. Or she would kill him and walk out herself.
She opened the notebook and clicked the pen. ‘Session One’ she wrote at the top of the blank page, wincing as her head throbbed. “When did you first want to kill someone?”