Chapter Text
Cal looked away as Kami’s head fell to the floor. BD-1 beeped angrily on his shoulder.
“You Jedi are so pathetic!” The Ninth Sister laughed.
He Force pushed the Ninth Sister back until she slid off the platform. He saw her hand hanging onto the edge, but decided to escape instead of fight. He sprinted back to the lift, then entered the second one quickly. He sat on the floor and pulled his knees to his chest. BD came off of his shoulder, and leaned in beside him.
Bee-woop.
He rested one hand on BD’s head, but didn’t say anything. The closer to the Mantis he got, the deeper the heaviness in his chest became. Kami was gone, again. This time for good. He knew she would always be with him in the Force, but right now, it didn’t matter. He could only hope she would visit him in spirit.
The elevator stopped and he ran to the Mantis. He climbed the ramp into the ship, “Go!”
Greez promptly took off and jumped into hyperspace. Cal breathed heavily, his heart pounded so hard it felt like it was beating out of his chest. He stumbled to the couch and allowed his knees to give way. Cere and Merrin sat on either side of him.
“Cal, what happened? Where’s Kami?” Cere urged.
“She…she was killed by the Ninth Sister. I tried to save her but I…I failed.”
“You can’t blame yourself, Cal. The Inquisitors are ruthless.” Cere said.
“She said the only way I could save Kami is if I joined them. I almost gave in but…Kami stopped me. She said she’d rather die than see me with them.”
“You made the right choice,” Merrin said, “the Empire would’ve only become stronger with you on their side.”
“But if I had done something, anything, differently, I might’ve been able to save her.”
“You did the best you could. Kami knows that. Remember what you learned from facing your Master. She wouldn’t want you to become disconnected from the Force again.” Cere said.
“I know, I just…I thought maybe she would be with us longer.”
“No matter when someone passes on,” Merrin started, “it will never feel like we had enough time with them.”
“Merrin’s right. I know this is all fresh right now, but just as you made peace with Master Tapal being gone, you will find peace with Kami’s death.”
The three of them were silent for a while. He knew they were right, but grief exhausted him. He hadn’t known this pain since Master Tapal and Prauf died. He knew he would feel it again, but he didn’t think he would feel it so soon.
He went to the back of the ship to meditate. A part of him hoped to see Kami when he did, another part of him hoped he wouldn’t. When he knelt down and closed his eyes, everything went blank.
~~~
He drifted through the next few days with a hole in his chest. He busied himself with missions from Saw, which kept him going. As long as he fought for those who were suffering, he could find peace. He promised himself he would keep fighting.
One day, Saw contacted him about a TIE factory on Corellia that he needed information on before he could attack. He ordered him to break into an Imperial base on Coruscant to find the blueprints. Saw didn’t have any more information on which Imperial base the plans were in, but Cal immediately thought of Bode. He had hacked into the Imperial network to find Elion’s location, maybe he could help him again.
~~~
He rang Bode’s apartment, the doors unlocked right away. He let him inside and closed the blinds.
“What can I do for you, Cal?”
“I need your help. I have to find the location of an Imperial base with blueprints for a TIE factory on Corellia.”
“And the Imperial base is here?”
“Yeah, that’s right.”
“Okay, just a sec,” Bode went to his holotable and started typing. Silence filled the room while he searched.
“Where’s Kami?”
“She’s…she’s dead. An Inquisitor killed her.”
“I see,” Bode paused for a moment to process, then continued, “This is it. It’s on level 3105.”
“Thanks,” Cal started walking to the door.
“And Cal, I’m sorry about Kami. She was a good friend.”
“And the best sister anyone could hope for.” Cal paused, “I’ve been doing some work for Saw Gerrera. We’re always looking for new recruits if you’re interested.”
“Thanks for the offer, but I got my own things I need to take care of.”
“Of course. If you ever change your mind, don’t hesitate to contact him.” Cal wrote Saw’s contact information on a piece of paper and gave it to him.
“I’ll keep it in mind. I hope you can give the Empire a taste of their own medicine.”
Cal nodded, then left without another word.
He boarded the Mantis and entered the location into the holotable. Once they landed on level 3105, Cere gathered everyone together.
“I think we need to talk about what happens after this mission,” she said.
“What do you mean?” Cal asked.
“I know you want to keep fighting the Empire, but we need to face facts. There are other ways to stand up to them.”
“Or maybe we could, you know, lay low for a while. Open a cantina somewhere,” Greez added.
Cal looked away. “If we stop, we let them win,” his voice was stern, “one of us has to keep fighting.”
“There’s a difference between taking a break and giving up,” Cere said.
“If we take a break, more people suffer longer.”
The silence between the four of them was deafening. His face was hot. Kami died fighting the Empire. She never gave up. Her death lit a fire inside of him to keep going. If she could endure all the unimaginable torture they put her through, he could handle whatever they threw at him. He imagined all the people who were struggling from their injuries, for their next meal, their next breath. Just like Kami did. The thought made his blood boil, and his friends wanted to stop?
“We can all agree the Empire must be stopped,” Cere started again, “but we each have our own paths.”
He sighed and looked down, “If you want to go your separate ways, I won’t stop you. But I can’t quit. Not now, not ever. I have to keep fighting until everyone is free.”
“That is a heavy burden to bear,” Merrin said.
“Yeah,” he sighed, “but it’s mine.”
“Well,” Cere said, rising from her seat, “I’ll help you finish this job. But after that, I think it’s best if we each find our own place in the galaxy.”
Cal couldn’t bring himself to look at her. After all they had been through together, he still couldn’t understand why she would leave.
“I will, too,” Merrin said, “I believe it is time for me to return to Dathomir. I still have so much to discover now that I have spent time away.”
Merrin too? Her leaving hurt a bit more. He hadn’t had as much time with her as he wanted. But he could at least understand that she wanted to go back home. No matter how creepy it was.
Greez looked around anxiously, “Look, I’m sorry Cal. But I can’t keep doing this. I’m not in as good of shape as I used to be. But maybe one day, I’ll join you again.”
“Maybe all of us will,” Cere said, “we can never know where the Force will lead us. I hope we cross paths in the future.”
“If it helps,” Greez said, “I think it’s time I let you have the Mantis. Just promise you’ll take care of her for me, okay? And if you ever need repairs, you can come and see me.”
Cal met his eyes, “I will.”
“Well, I guess you should get going.” Cere said.
“Yeah,” Cal took a deep breath. Cere was right. Maybe the Force would bring them together again one day. He hated the thought of leaving but the more he thought about it, the more he settled down.
Cere, Merrin, and Greez all followed through on their promise to get the blueprints. Merrin fought with him, for what could be the last time. When they returned, he sent the plans to Saw.
“Don’t forget,” Cere said, “I will always believe in you. We all will.”
“I never doubted you for a second.” Greez added.
“Thanks. I hope to see you around the galaxy sometime.” Cal gave a weak smile. Both of them hugged him, then left to catch a transport off of Coruscant.
“So…you’re going back to Dathomir?”
“Yes. I have learned much that I wish to share with my sleeping sisters. And I wish to learn more from them as well.”
“I hope you find what you’re looking for.”
“You as well, Cal Kestis.” She briefly touched his hand, then joined Cere and Greez.
He sat down in the pilot’s chair and looked around the cockpit. He already missed the conversations between all four of them.
Cal.
Kami’s voice echoed in his ear. He spun his chair around, as if he would be able to see her.
I’m proud of you.
He rested his head in his hands. His eyes burned. BD sat on his lap. His thoughts whirled. It all felt like too much. His world had crashed down around him. Trust only in the Force.
He sat up, blinking the tears away and set a course for Saw’s temporary rebel base to get his next assignment. He didn’t want to fight alongside the rebels without Greez, Cere, Merrin, and Kami, but he wouldn’t be fighting alone. He looked forward to aiding the rebellion. The Empire had taken enough. He had to fight back. For Master Tapal, Prauf, and Kamari Kestis.
THE END