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Jayce always liked taking things apart.
It got him in trouble as a kid. Taking apart clocks and toasters and fans — all kinds of mechanical devices. More than once his mother had caught him halfway through disassembling some appliance, giving him a scolding about how he had better put it back together— and that it had better work when he did.
And eventually, they did work again. Sometimes took a few tries, or some spare parts — or a little jimmy-rigging in the case of one particularly stubborn electric kettle — but he got it back together.
He just wanted to see how it all worked. There was no way to know something better, more intimately, than to take it apart piece by piece.
“Ah, Jayce—“
Viktor put a hand over his mouth, trying to muffle the little gasps and whimpers. Which, obviously, would not do.
The noise he made when Jayce took his mouth off of him was nothing short of desperate. Needy, keening, almost pained— but, regardless, Jace stood from where he was kneeling beside the bed.
An important part of taking something apart was separating every individual piece, laying it all out so he could examine the function of each and every one.
And, like this, he could see Viktor all laid out for him. Legs spread, cunt practically dripping from his previous ministrations, cock standing at full attention, shining beneath dark curls. His pale skin was dotted with marks, indentations from his back brace nearly invisible with how dark the bites bloomed.
It was important to take your time, after all.
His hips canted upwards with the cruel removal of stimulation, chest heaving, panting heavily as he so clearly tried to regain focus. One hand was gripping the sheets, the other over his mouth. It did nothing to hide how his cheeks flushed with dark spots of color, how his eyes glistened, nearly at the point of tears.
The sight probably shouldn’t have made him as proud as he was.
Jayce leaned forward, still keeping his legs spread, mattress dipping as he braced his arm on the bed. Like this, he almost completely covered him, face to face, chest to chest, bodies close enough to feel the fever-like heat radiating between them. Viktor looked at him with brows drawn up tight in a question.
“Why—“
Honestly, it was impressive that he held out this long, retaining the ability to stay quiet… until now.
No two pieces should be overlapping. That’s how you missed things.
Gently, with his free hand, Jayce moved Viktor’s arm to his side, uncovering his face. He pressed chaste kisses to his cheek, his chin, his jaw. A jarring contrast to a moment before with his tongue buried deep inside—
“Let me hear you?” Jayce asked into the sensitive spot right behind and beneath his ear.
Viktor shivered in response, body tense, shaking. Needy. Beyond the point of pride.
“Yes, yes, fine—“ He breathed, still turning his face away. “Whatever gets us back to the part where—“
Viktor was cut off by a gasp as Jayce reached down and pinched his cock between his fingers.
“And you say I get impatient?”
He made a face that was certainly not pouting, tone aiming at frustrated but still wired with desperation. “Goddamn it, Jayce, please—“
“Shh, relax.” Jayce whispered by his ear, nipping the delicate skin there for good measure, still toying with his cock. “I’ve got you.”
“Perhaps—“ Viktor started, only just managing the words between breaths and little choked out sounds. “That is— precisely… what I am worried about.”
He smiled against the skin he’d been abusing, pulling away to capture Viktor’s mouth in a proper kiss.
For how unaffected he tried to sound, the hunger came through in how Viktor kissed. He kissed like a starving man, like he had no time, like he needed their bodies to be one and the same. He could taste himself on his lips, no doubt— sour and metallic, filthy and perfect. Jayce was more than happy to match pace, to let him take the lead with hands grasping at his body wherever they found purchase.
The grip in his hair tightened as Jayce pushed two fingers into his entrance— he curled them upwards and swallowed down the moan that followed.
Cause and effect. Under certain conditions, a certain action would produce a certain result.
Over. And over. And over.
Viktor was squirming beneath him, breaking away from the kiss to pant for breath. His lips were glossy with spit and slick.
…when there weren’t confounding variables.
He had hyperventilated like this before—
Jayce paused. “Do you need a moment? Are you—“
“Jayce Talis, I swear to god if you stop touching me one more time—“
There was no follow through. There didn’t need to be, not with the way he shuddered as Jayce, as soon as he got the green light. continued the assault on his g-spot.
“You were saying?”
“Shut up and fuck me.” Viktor hissed through gritted teeth.
“Now that—“ He pressed a tender kiss to the underside of his jaw. “—I can do.”
But, just because there were some unexpected variables didn’t mean he could skip steps. Just because he wasn’t taking notes didn’t mean he wasn’t going to be thorough.
People had often chided Jayce about his stubbornness, but every trait had two sides.
Pain blossomed through his scalp, Viktor’s fist tightening in his hair. Cause and effect: a response to his teeth sinking into a particularly sensitive part of his neck. He wasn’t pulling him away, though. On the contrary, Jayce could feel his cunt tighten around his fingers, cock twitching against his palm.
Which, well… when an opportunity arose. Still fucking into him with his fingers, Jayce ground his palm against him, providing enough stimulation to have Viktor moaning voicelessly, head tipped back.
Stubbornness was one word. Dedication was another.
Because while he didn’t take physical notes— that felt like a violation— Jayce still kept a record of the easiest ways to take him apart. The callous on his hands provided more friction, something that other partners had found aversive, but Viktor, not being very sensitive, adored. So: grinding his hand against his cock, the pads of his fingers stroking that spot inside.
He could stay like this forever, finger-fucking him into delirium, but that wasn’t the task. Viktor was good at knowing what he wanted— and he’d been given orders.
So Jayce pulled back, separating their bodies, resisting the urge to lick the beads of sweat that ran in the hollows of Viktor’s collarbones, that collected on his chest. The smell alone drove him wild, made him want to press his face into his lover and never allow himself to be separated, but—
As per previously: that was not the task.
…besides, he had already made Viktor come on his tongue tonight. Twice. So he really ought to be satisfied with that.
Dedication may have been one of his more positive traits, but with it came obsession. Someone compared him to a bulldog, once: when he’d latched onto something, really sunk his teeth in? He wasn’t letting go.
The change in position meant that Viktor had to let go of him, his shoulder, his hair. It was clear that he would have put an arm over his face— went to do so, for a moment, but flopped it down over his head instead.
Something about that made Jayce’s chest feel warm.
The angle wasn’t as good with his hand, standing like this, but that was going to be a temporary problem. He reached for a condom from the dresser, did his best to keep touching Viktor, giving him enough stimulation to tide him over in the meantime as he got the packet open.
By this point he was so hard it was nearly painful, messy with pre-come. Some of it was smeared on Viktor’s stomach from when he’d leaned over him, the little bit of friction between their bodies enough to have him weeping with it.
That, and the fact that they could have been at this for hours, by this point. Those things stopped mattering to him, though— his jaw getting sore, his hand cramping, being almost dizzy with his own arousal— all of it was secondary.
He had a more important task.
Jayce shivered at his own touch rolling on the condom, gave himself a couple pumps to make sure there was sufficient lubrication.
Viktor’s eyes were squeezed shut, now— an almost sure sign that he’d started crying in earnest. Both hands were up by his head now, both gripping the sheets. Neither obscuring him from view, neither trying to muffle the sweet little sounds he made.
Not that he was particularly vocal, other than their typical banter. No— every real noise he could earn was an accomplishment… Other than the positively obscene amount of noise from his cunt, but that was a reward in and of itself.
At first, even just getting him to not cover his face? Was unheard of. It took time to break down those barriers, hours and orgasms and a kind of safety he would venture to say Viktor hadn’t experienced often in his life.
It was vulnerable.
Jayce lined himself up, pulling out his fingers, only just placing the tip of his cock against his cunt. He was more than prepped for it.
Both hands gripped the sheets, eyes closed— breathing ragged, but not to a concerning degree. His legs had both twitched inward near instinctively at the change, the right continuing to tremble.
So he took his leg gently in hand, giving him the extra support.
“You ready?”
Viktor scoffed, opening his eyes. “Took long enough— I have been ready.”
One of these days, he was going to succeed at fucking all the smart-ass comments out of him. Or die trying, but that would be well worth it.
And now with the go ahead—
Jayce couldn’t help but groan as he sank into Viktor’s tight, wet heat. He never got used to him. Never could. Every time he was overwhelmed by the sensation.
Viktor’s reaction was similar, at least. One hand reached downward, scratching at the sheets there until Jayce put a hand on Viktor’s thigh to move him, to get a better angle. Seemingly, that was what he wanted: to be within grasping range. He grabbed ahold of his wrist like an anchor point. His eyes stayed closed, head tipped back.
As much as Viktor complained about it, that check in was necessary. After that one time, when he panicked— when he was hyperventilating for long enough they probably should have gotten help— when he pushed him away— it turned out okay now, sure, but it was terrifying. He never wanted to put him through that again.
Viktor had a complicated relationship to his body, and sex wasn’t excluded from that.
Just being able to have him, fully naked, laid out on the bed like this was incredible. Ordinarily he’d try to hide in some way, to distract from how his body looked. As if there was something wrong.
As if he were something wrong.
Because Viktor told him once, drunkenly, when he tried to talk about previous partners and sex and shit, that sex was a… complicated topic, for him. Jayce didn’t get it, then. He wasn’t looking for signs— how could he have been? People had problems with sex for all kinds of reasons. He figured it had something to do with his disability and moved on.
He didn’t need to know.
“If you don’t— fucking— move—“
Jayce gave his thigh a reassuring squeeze, pulled out slowly, and slammed back in to the hilt.
Skin met skin with a punched out moan, from which of them he couldn’t be sure.
Even still not knowing why, he did his best to adapt, to anticipate trouble and be ready for it. When fucking Viktor, he needed to be able to see him. So he checked. From there, he could close his eyes all he wanted— he just needed to check in.
Always making adjustments.
Making sure to be gentle with his bad leg, even if he was being harsh everywhere else. Never doing anything that could impede breathing.
He was gasping now, though— hand on his wrist like a vice, panting heavy.
Jayce didn’t know much about Viktor’s past, really— he knew he was from the undercity, lower entresol, just above the sumps. He knew both his parents died when he was a kid. He knows he got accepted into the academy young, on a special scholarship.
Other than that? That was it… For concrete facts.
Because he knew he’d always used a cane, always been scrawny and sickly. An easy target, as he said. He knew that he wasn’t a virgin before him, but not because he’d been told so. He knew that, if not given proper warning and ability to see him, Viktor would start panicking the moment he was inside him.
He didn’t want to think about why that may be. He didn’t want to consider the ways people had treated him as less than all his life, to make him hide the way he did, made him afraid in the ways he was.
Because Viktor found himself to be nothing special to look at, thought that his face was mediocre and his body was revolting. He didn’t so much apologize for his appearance the first time they did this, but he made a quip about not looking like Jayce with that tone to his voice that carried more weight than it ought to.
He was full of little comments like that. Things that, if you weren’t paying attention, you wouldn’t see the sadness in.
The sound of skin meeting skin was obscene, the way he tensed with every thrust bringing Jayce dangerously close.
He knew Viktor had been relieved to learn he was bisexual, since that meant he was the most likely to be fine with his body in terms of gender. Jayce didn’t know how to express that, no, his body wasn’t any less a man’s— even if he weren’t attracted to women, he would be attracted to Viktor. There was no way to say that— not that he would listen to.
But he could try.
“God, you look so beautiful like this. So perfect.”
Viktor whined.
“So good for me.”
Even if there was nothing else, he would be attracted to Viktor.
He could keep babbling praises, could wax poetic about him til the day he died, could try to convince him with quantified calculations, but right now—
Right now he had a task: completely taking him apart.
Because none of those flaws Viktor thought were so important mattered to him, really. They didn’t impact his dedication, his obsession.
What they did, though, was make unwritten parameters, unsaid factors behind Viktor’s behavior. They made sex a complicated topic, tying all of it together into a mess of non-functional parts, doing nothing but making things more difficult, less pleasurable. Everything from being insecure about how he sounds, the crying, the inability to relax, his body, his lack of sensitivity—
Like pieces pushed to their limits, until they slid and wore down, barely holding together, miraculously still functioning. A lifetime of use and abuse in stripped screws and bent pipes, neglected until it rusted that way.
Jayce wasn’t stupid enough to believe he could fix him, that he could undo the damage. People weren’t machines— it wasn’t that simple. He couldn’t strip off the rust, replace the faulty bits, and make it like nothing ever happened.
But he could do this. He could do what he asked.
He could push his thigh to his chest and plunge deeper, hooking his good leg over his shoulder to free his hand.
The other was still occupied, holding the other leg, taking its weight and keeping it from painful spasms. It was the best he could do to alleviate pain— that he knew of. Viktor never said; all he could do was read his face, the tiny shifts that carried all too much meaning.
Like how he knew, from the tremble of his jaw, the way he bit into his lip, the tightness of his breath, that he was close.
And thank god, because Jayce didn’t know how much longer he could hold out. The things seeing Viktor like this did to him—
Closer, like this, he could see every detail. How his lashes fluttered, how the thin skin of his lips was starting to break under the pressure of his teeth.
Jayce took his chin in his hand, angled his face down, and kissed him again. That got him to stop biting his lip, at least— earning a hand in his hair and a metallic taste across his tongue.
He hoped Viktor could tell, just how much he wanted him. Blood, sweat, slick, and tears— everything. Anything. He would do anything he asked, would tear the very moon out of the sky if he wanted.
Continuing the rhythm, Jayce reached a hand between their bodies. Viktor’s back arched as he rubbed his cock, a cry that could have been pleasure or pain either tearing from his throat.
His back, another factor.
From the sounds that followed? He was willing to bet on pleasure. Viktor breathed something that could almost be words, nothing but gasped vowels and half consonants. He was tensing, hand pulling tight at his hair, the other back to clawing at his shoulder—
Th final pieces came undone.
Viktor met his peak, body shuddering, eyes watering, joining their lips together to steal the air from Jayce’s lungs. He stroked him through it, wringing out his orgasm for all it was worth.
He didn’t stand a chance— not with that tight, wet heat pulsing around him. Viktor came and pulled him down with him. Any noise he made was lost to Viktor’s mouth; any words about how good or perfect he was, any repetition of his name over and over like a prayer.
In that post-orgasm haze, Jayce wondered if maybe then he’d internalize it.
The wobbling of his own legs brought him back to the moment— it took altogether too much effort to remain upright, but he was not about to collapse onto Viktor.
No, he had a task; the pieces were all laid out, separate, dismantled.
Jayce stood back upright, carefully lowering Viktor’s legs as he did. He whimpered at the loss as he pulled out, hole clenching around nothing in a way that almost had him right back down on his knees.
Almost.
He tied off and tossed the condom quickly as he dared and returned to the bed. Fuck the sheets, right now— he laid down and gathered up Viktor into his arms, tenderly moving him further onto the bed to lessen the strain on his legs.
Viktor buried his face in his shoulder, still shaking, crying. It scared him, the first few times it happened— made him think he’d done something wrong no matter how much he tried to convince him otherwise.
It’s the only time he cries anymore, he said.
So it made sense, in that way. To let go. To let it all out. To let himself fall apart in whatever way he would. Holding him close, one hand on his back, the other stroking through his hair, gently teasing out the friction tangles from the sheets.
Getting to hold him through it was a newer development, though. Viktor had a tendency to separate himself, to shut down— as though, if he just kept it together long enough, everything would fix itself.
His hands clung onto Jayce now, though.
At first, he’d said something about not needing comfort, about being just fine. For him to keep his pity to himself.
When Jayce asked if he wanted it, though, he didn’t answer the question.
It was only after that time, the hyperventilating, the panic attack or whatever the hell that was—
That was the first time he’d been genuinely scared for Viktor’s life. The first time he’d seen him lose control of his demeanor. The first time he heard him speak his mother tongue. Jayce was terrified— not as much as he was, obviously, but all of a sudden having him break down like that?
He had locked himself in the bathroom. If it weren’t for the fact he could hear him breathing, Jayce was fairly certain he would have knocked down the door.
Now, though, the tears had petered out, leaving Viktor limp in his arms, boneless. Exhausted. Still catching his breath.
Then the next day came around, and he hadn’t slept all night. He sat there outside that bathroom door and waited, listening to each inhale and exhale.
That was when Viktor opened the door, dressed in only his shirt he’d kept on the night before and Jayce’s bathrobe. It was so huge he nearly swam in it, hands lost in the sleeves.
Jayce had been ready to beg for forgiveness, when he apologized. For such a loss of rationality.
And that’s when he broke down. At Viktor’s feet, where he’d been sitting all night, not wanting to move or stand in case it startled him again. Begging to know if he was okay, what he’d done wrong, if he hurt him, what he could do to right this wrong—
And Viktor had reassured him, backwards as that was. Told him that he didn’t need to be held.
So Jayce asked if he would hold him. It was the first time they’d touched for that prolonged a time not sexually, somehow the most intimate thing they’d done. Viktor had shivered, and melted into the embrace.
They both needed it, really.
Viktor was bound to be getting cold by now, though. Sweat cooled and always left him shivering; even keeping socks on, his feet managed to get frigid in mere moments— let alone his hands.
“We need to clean up, V.”
He made an indistinct noise.
“And you should definitely drink some water.”
This would be met with one of two responses: either he would relent, or—
Viktor said nothing but turned his face away, nuzzling into his shoulder.
“Few more minutes.” Jayce chuckled, going back to playing with his hair.
That got him a contented hum, almost a purr, really.
After that, they’d had a very long conversation about what happened somehow without addressing what exactly “it” was and why. He’d heard of similar things happening to enforcers or soldiers, but not… in this context.
He just couldn’t get the image of Viktor’s eyes out of his head, wide with terror, looking at him like—
Viktor unburied his face just enough to make eye contact, bleary and hazy as it was. He leaned up, pressed a kiss to his jaw, and went back to his spot in the meat of his shoulder.
Jayce smiled, pressing a kiss to the top of his head.
After sex, it wasn’t uncommon for him to cry, he’d finally told him outright— to cry, to struggle to speak. It had never been safe to relax and cuddle afterwards, had always been a weakness he could not allow himself. A breakdown like that had never happened to him before, though— in that way, at least.
There were a lot of issues he didn’t address, but it wasn’t hard to read between lines. The way he resented his body. The way his steady hands shook, ever so slightly, as he explained.
He hugged him again, after that talk— asked first, of course, but wrapped him up and held him tight to his chest. Finally, Viktor seemed to start realizing that that contact? Wasn’t pity. It wasn’t looking down on him, it was—
Well, neither of them said love. But they both knew that’s what he meant.
Jayce had explained that he likes doing things for people, and Viktor had laughed, said he knew— but he didn’t know the extent, didn’t understand the way he wanted to serve. Didn’t understand that he wouldn’t just do anything for him, that he wanted to do it.
That had confused him. It led to asking Jayce to do odd things, just to test him, likely. In the undercity, he’d said, people were serious about debts owed. A favor for a favor.
It’s a favor to do you a favor, had been his reply— and Viktor laughed while he elbowed him, but not without a faint blush spreading across his cheeks.
That’s how they had gotten here: asking Jayce to walk him home and take him apart.
But taking something apart was the easy part. It was putting it back together that really mattered.
“Hey, V.” Jayce murmured into his hair, still gently running his fingers through. “May I carry you to the bathroom so we can clean up?”
Viktor reluctantly pulled back, at first only far enough to give him a pouting glare, lip curling. Then he took a deep breath, separating himself more as he “took inventory.” That’s what Jayce called it, at least, when he took a moment to think, parts of his body twitching as though he had to be sure they were responding. He made a face when he moved his good leg, letting out the breath in a huff.
Turning his face away, he gave him a shrug.
Immediately, before he changed his mind, Jayce smushed a kiss into his cheek. “Thank you, V.”
He scoffed, but it was token resignation— the new flush of color on his face said that much.
And the fact that, if he didn’t want Jayce to pick him up? He had no doubt that he would make sure it didn’t happen. Those elbows of his were sharp.
As it was, he scooped Viktor up in his arms, carrying him easily to the bathroom.
Too easily, honestly. Beautiful as he was either way, he could definitely be eating more regular meals.
Within moments he had the shower heating up, bathroom filling with warm steam. Viktor hummed sleepily, relaxed for once, sitting there with a towel around his shoulders so he didn’t get too chilled. It was a picture he wanted to remember forever. It was a picture he hoped to recreate over and over to the point it became indistinct, a lifetime made up of those little moments.
“I, uh, got a stool for the shower.” Jayce realized he hadn’t mentioned before— not like Viktor was really thinking much right now.
In fact, he only cracked open one eye to glare.
“Don’t look at me like that— we both know you don’t take your cane in the shower, and that’s the most logical next step.” He pointed out. “Besides… I thought it might be nice— so you can sit down, and I could maybe like… wash your hair? If that’s okay.”
Viktor opened the other eye and raised an eyebrow.
“We both know I love playing with your hair, it’s not that weird.”
He considered that for a moment before, finally, shrugging and humming his assent.
Jayce couldn’t help the huge grin that broke out across his face.
Viktor rolled his eyes, moving to get up…
…And not getting very far. The moment he put weight on his left leg — his good leg — he went right back down again. Thankfully, he had folded up a towel and set it on the toilet lid for him to sit on, so the fall wasn’t that hard, but from the way he hissed an inhale? It wasn’t painless.
“Are you okay?”
He opened his mouth as to speak, took in a breath— and let it out in a huff. He clenched his teeth, turned his face away.
“Okay, rephrase— are you hurt?”
Viktor took inventory, and shrugged, loosely gesturing at his body.
“Can I help?”
He, reluctantly, nodded. The flush across his face wasn’t the cute, playful kind from before— it was embarrassment, rising hot in his cheeks. His eyes were glassy, not quite at tears, but still not that far.
“Hey, V.” Jayce stepped in closer, kneeling down to level, putting his hands on his shoulders. “I want to do this… And, if I fucked something up, that’s on me to help you, too. Okay?”
His face was still tight. Resistant.
“Besides, if I fucked you hard enough you can’t stand? That’s pretty awesome.”
Finally, Viktor scoffed a laugh, shoulders relaxing under his hands.
“There you are.” Jayce smiled, leaning in and kissing him wherever it would land, ending up on the side of his nose. “I love your laugh, you know that?”
He weakly slapped his chest, that flush back full force— in a good way, this time.
“Your smile gets all lopsided, and your eyes crinkle in the cutest way—“
Viktor sighed, clearly fighting a smile as he gestured at the shower with his elbow. Moving on once the attention was turned directly at him, as usual.
People thought it was because he didn’t like attention, period, but really? He just didn’t know how to handle it. It was true he couldn’t care less about most people’s opinions on him; he certainly didn’t want the kind of fawning Jayce got at galas and council parties.
But from the people he cared about?
It was a delicate balance, acclimating him to affection. Giving enough to challenge, but not so much he shuts down. He couldn’t just pour out his whole heart, like he wanted to. This had to be gradual. Slowly heating a freezing glass, only just increasing the temperature bit by bit— throwing it straight over a Bunsen burner would only cause it to shatter.
He shrugged off the towel on his shoulders, back to fully exposing the littering of hickeys and bite marks—
Task. Stay on task.
Jayce took off his socks, gingerly holding his calf to slide them off. He kissed each shin, just for good measure.
This was not helping him stay on task.
“Help you stand—“ Jayce held out an arm. “—or just pick you up?” He shrugged his shoulder.
Viktor hesitated, eventually reaching forward with an already freezing hand, almost bracing himself as he put it on his shoulder.
“Great— ready?”
He nodded.
The transition was easy, picking him up from one side, setting him down on the other. He’d made sure the water wasn’t too hot to begin with, so the temperature change wasn’t too shocking since—
Viktor immediately turned it hotter.
—he was very capable of changing that however he liked.
“Alright— tip your head back for me?”
Viktor closed his eyes, leaning back, water droplets running down his body—
Jayce leaned down to kiss him on the forehead.
The corner of his lip twitched upward. Score.
Between the post-coital exhaustion, the pain in what seemed to be his hip, and the hot water, Viktor was clearly… off. Drowsy, distant, just subdued— something like that. Heat did that to him, he’d learned during the heatwave last summer. It made him prone to fainting, too.
He was keeping watch for that, though. Slumped as Viktor was, it wasn’t because he was losing consciousness.
Regardless, he kept at least one hand on him, bodies always in contact even when he washed his own hair and body. If he drifted out of place, lost track of where he was, who he was with—
Jayce just wanted him to be safe. More than that, to feel safe, to know that he didn’t need to worry— he’d be taken care of.
In sickness and in health sounded a bit too much like wedding vows, but…
As he lathered the soap, he found himself humming an old tune. Something soft and sweet— soothing. Relaxing, he hoped.
“You doing okay?”
Viktor made a noise that sounded like a yes, so he continued, rinsing, working the conditioner into his hair.
“…I suppose I will smell like you.” He said in a soft voice, almost too quiet to hear.
As much as he didn’t want him to force himself to speak until he was ready, the sound of his voice was a relief.
Jayce smiled, kissing his head again. “Yeah, I guess you will.”
“I am sure that satisfies you and your… mm.” Viktor breathed, slow and heavy. “…Possessive tendencies?”
“My what now?”
He smirked, tipping his head back to look up at him. “You are saying you don’t mark me up like this to, ah… demonstrate, that I am yours?”
Even in context, just hearing him say the words “I am yours” had Jayce’s heartbeat racing.
Viktor laughed. “I am not saying it is a bad thing, you know.”
“Oh.” He let out a sigh of relief. “That’s good.”
“It’s just your Piltie habits— claiming everything you lay eyes on.”
Jayce choked. “Can I laugh at that?”
“Eh, I don’t care… Your future in politics may, however.”
“My future in politics—“ He just scoffed a smile, rolling his eyes, for a change. “And I’ll have you know, it’s only you.”
“What is only me?”
Jayce laid his hands on his shoulders, tracing the paths between marks from there— one hand down to his hip, the other up to his neck. Viktor had his head tipped back, eyes lidded heavily, that soft smile on his lips.
“What I ‘lay claim’ to.”
Viktor shivered beneath his touch, throat bobbing under his palm.
“You are your own creature, but I cannot go again.”
He pulled back, not so far down, not so encompassing. “Oh, of course not— you’re almost falling asleep on me.”
The breath that followed was almost relieved, and hearing it hurt something in his chest. Just the idea—
Jayce reached for another washcloth. “Your hair is pretty much rinsed, if you’re okay with me washing your body?”
Viktor gave him an odd look. “You just had your face in all of my crevices.”
“And?”
“Odd thing to ask about, when I already have given you access to my body.”
He saw his point, he really did… It just made his stomach clench, his heart ache. He couldn’t start that conversation now, though—
“Just thought I’d ask.”
“If the real question is whether I will do it, you know you do not have to.”
“No! No.” Jayce wet the washcloth, almost fumbling with the soap in his haste. “I. I would like to. If you’ll let me.”
Viktor gave him that questioning look again. “What you gain out of this, I have no idea— but
… you may, if you would like to so badly.”
He nodded, and quickly got to work.
It wasn’t erotic, touching him like this. Even seeing the marks he put on his thighs, his chest, his neck— it made his chest warm, sure, but this? A warm washcloth and his partners body in his hands?
It was intimate. More so than anything he’d ever felt.
He could tell that Viktor wasn’t handling the amount of attention well, though, so he didn’t linger. He saw him fully naked so rarely, after all— a part of him wanted to document everything, every mole, every scar, every particularly sensitive spot. How all the parts fit together, the distance, the shape of his bones. He could graph the little curve of his waist between ribs and hipbones, the arch of his back, the curves of his spine.
But this wasn’t the time. That wasn’t the task. Right now, he was just washing his body, getting them ready to fall into bed together.
“There we go.” Jayce leant down to kiss his face— this time getting his left eye. “You ready to get out?”
Viktor hummed, ran a hand over his face. “If you are also clean? Yes.”
“Yep— got myself in between.”
“Mm. So there will not be a favor for me to repay you.” He sighed. “And if you say that cheesed line again—“
“Letting me do you a favor is doing me a favor.” Jayce grinned, kissing his cheek. “And it’s cheesy.”
Viktor elbowed him, thankfully not with full stabbing force. “You are cheesy.”
He just kissed him again. “You know it.”
As he shut the water off he was already reaching for a towel, putting it on Viktor’s head and draped over his shoulders like a nun’s habit.
Gently, he toweled off his hair, Viktor leaning into the touch when his hand met the side of his face. Jayce slid the towel out from between them, keeping his hand in place.
Viktor blinked his eyes open, looking up at him, water making his lashes look impossibly long, gaze heavy lidded, eyes that impossible shade of amber—
Softly, he turned into his hand, and without looking away, kissed his rough palm.
He couldn’t do anything else to respond, other than leaning down and capturing his lips in a real kiss. Not the biting, consuming one from before— just the gentle glide of soft lips. The perfect parts sliding into place. The moment could have lasted forever, bodies hot and steaming from the shower, minds cloudy and calm.
But, eventually, Viktor pulled away, panting for breath. All good things, he supposed.
From there, Jayce continued toweling him off. Careful not to pull his hair, but thorough nonetheless. Pouring over every piece of his body that made up the whole for as long as Viktor would allow.
His hip was slightly wrong, though. It wasn’t too swollen, or slipped entirely out of socket, but the joint was almost certainly out of place.
“Sorry, about that.”
“Do not apologize.” Viktor ran a hand through his hair, scratching his scalp. “If it were not for my body being the way it is—“
“You wouldn’t be you.” Jayce laid his head in his lap, letting him continue playing with his hair. “I wouldn’t change anything about who you are. Unless— if I could make it so you aren’t in pain, but—“
“Hush.” He laid his hand over his face, encouraging his eyes shut. “You cannot change me. You cannot take away my pain. ‘What if’ scenarios? Do nothing but cause heartache. There is nothing you can do.”
Jayce took a deep breath, let it out slowly. “Then we’ll figure something out. I just… I just want to be there for you. Be there with you.”
He could hear the soft smile in Viktor’s voice as he resumed petting his hair. “You truly are stubborn, aren’t you?”
“I like to say dedicated.”
“One and the same.”
“…Fair point.”
They stayed like that for another moment, Jayce kneeling with his head in Viktor’s lap, Viktor carding through his hair.
Eventually, they had to move. They had to finish drying off, and Jayce had to grab them sleep clothes and change the sheets. Life was made up of all those little pieces, every small step. Getting dressed. Brushing your teeth. Taking a piss. Carrying your partner to bed, already half asleep.
Probably would have been asleep, if not for his hip.
“I cannot believe you, Jayce Talis—“ Viktor grumbled, lying flat, bringing his leg up toward him. “Dislocating my hip—“
“I can help you fix it—“
“No, no, I will get it—“ He grimaced. “…eventually.”
“Vik. I took it apart— I ought to put it back together then, right?” Jayce held the leg in place, at least taking off some of the strain of holding it up like that. “Just tell me what to do.”
Viktor was literally biting at his tongue— he could tell from the pinched face, the way he took a deep breath, jaw releasing when he let it go.
“You… want to help.”
“Yes.”
“Even with this?”
Jayce nodded. “With anything.”
“Anything?”
“Anything.” He repeated. “I’ve got you.”
Now he was biting his tongue figuratively, brows knit tight together, squeezing his eyes shut and—
Just letting go.
Viktor looked at him, tentative, guarded, but… hopeful.
“Alright then.” He swallowed, reached down to move where Jayce’s hands were. “Hold my leg in place here, I will push against…”
It wasn’t difficult, really. Viktor knew how to take care of himself, so just being there to help? Couldn’t have been easier.
Couldn’t have been more of an honor.
And, with all the pieces slid back into their proper places, sleep wasn’t far off. Even as Jayce ran his fingers through damp hair, wishing the moment could last forever.