Chapter Text
“I am skeptical about how and why you're so calm about this.”
“Well, let’s think about it, shall we? This isn’t the first time I’ve died.”
I can’t even begin to describe how pissed off this god looks right now. I feel like I’m the boulder and that one guy is pushing it up a hill. I think his name was Sisyphus or something- who cares, it's real?Yes, I’m currently his burden, and I’m loving it. Call it revenge for his attempt to use me.
On another note, yeah, death.
If I had a penny for every single death I’ve had, I’d have two- actually, I might have 3 from flatlining that one time… Eh, sure, I’ll count it. I’d have 3 pennies, which is weird.
Apparently, getting hit with the full force of an exploding alien bullet is basically impossible to survive, especially if you're human. If you had hope and thought I was going to live, you were sorely mistaken.
It didn’t even hurt. One moment, I was realizing what the thing was, and the next, I was sitting in the familiar void realm with this fuck. Actually, the ‘void realm’ this time around is much more detailed in a way that’s way too hard to explain. Everything seems more defined, but still pitch black. It’s very similar to the feeling that was going on with Primus trying to make me do his dirty work,k except with objects. I feel like a chair should be there, but I can’t see one cause everything is vata-black but darker.
Huh, guess death just kinda does that to you.
Back on that subject, I really do think I was kind of destined to die in some way in all of this fuckery. I mean, think about it, a 13-year-old gets thrown into a robo-war, talks to god, basically gets mauled by the Cybertronian equivalent of Gollum's degree in remembering things, survives a car wreck, and probably a bunch of other stuff that I can’t remember, and doesn’t die??? Like, come on, let’s be realistic here. At the very best, I would’ve been severely injured.
“You do that quite a bit, child,” Primus speaks, interrupting my wonderful inner monologue about the situation. He’s quick to continue his sentence, “By that I mean talk to yourself. I would be pleased with the act due to it making communication much more compelling; however, the things you ponder are much too concerning to be such.”
Ha, good. Hopefully, that means he’s getting tired of me and will leave me alone. My death is 13 years late,e and I’d like to rest in peace, effectively completing at least one of my main goals of staying out of the spotlight. Suck it isakai system, I win!
“Why, I would delight in seeing you find your peace. We still have work to do, child.”
I side-eye him.
“In addition to that, I hope you’ll be pleased to know that I’m not growing tired of you.”
I let out a long groan. Stars, I wanna scream into a pillow right about now. Why can’t bro just let me push him away and ignore all of the problems he forces onto me?
I don’t talk for a few seconds, taking a moment to just stare into the void while contemplating why my life has gone this way. “So,” I finally start, “you mentioned something about doing something? Like, when I first got into this place?”
He nods, “You would be correct. Since you’ve passed, our circumstances have become much more complicated as well as muchsimplere.” Okay, confusing much. You know what, maybe he gets on my nerves more than I get on his nerves…
“You’d, once again, be correct.” For the love of- STAY OUTA MY HEAD! IT’S GETTING ANNOYING. “... No. Now, if you are to complete your task of fetching me the All Spark, you will need to be revived.”
“... Dude, are fucking kidding me?” I basically plead, looking at him with a dumbfounded yet exhausted expression. Did I not just state that I wanted to rest in peace? I mean, come on, dude.
“I’m…” He pauses for a long while, his words dying on his metaphorical tongue, “I am aware of how hard of an ask that is, but.t”
“But it isn’t an a,sk, and you’re actually just telling me to do it. Fine, I get it.” I don’t get it, not one bit, but I really don’t wanna argue with this loser right now. If he’s going to keep pestering me about the fucking cube even when I’m dead, might as well just get it done with.
Before he can comment on my obvious dislike of the situation and my obvious dislike of him, I change topics. “You want me to revive, so how is that gonna work? Is this gonna be like how Cybertronians can be revived, orrrrr?” I think back to the Skybound comics and how the Autobots revived some of their members.
I’m just gonna go out on a limb here and assume that any revival shit is either the same or similar to the Skybound revival stuff. I know I’m not a Cybertronian, and it’s a whole otheruniverses,e so it most likely not gonna work the same way. If iwereas tct same, I’d probably just get insta-killed-
I can’t, though, since I've already died! YOHOHOHOHOHO!
Ahh, we love referencing an anime that has nothing to do with this situation… god, I wish I could just stay dead now.
It’s nice in the void. No worrying (other than Mr. Planet over here), no chaos (other than me, of course), no nothing really. If I were to just stay dead here, it would get boring so quickly, but I’d also be really peaceful for the first bit.
The god seems to ponder for a second, either still thinking about my disdain for him and the shithe'ss putting me through or thinking about the comparison I made. “Yes, yes. That method would be similar to it, just noas,s- how do I put this, rudimentary. The main concept will parallel what we’re going to be doing.”
“I do have an inquiry, however.”
“...Okay?”
“What are ‘Skybound comics’.Follow-upp question: What are ‘comics’?”
“I’m not explaining the entire concept of comics to you right now.”
I’m a little surprised. Not by the comic thing, that makes sense. But about how he doesn’t know about the Skybound universe. I feel like he should know what it is, considering he’s a god and all- well, that’s just contradicting myself. I literally made a whole ass presentation for a mythology class about this fucker and how he isn’t 100% omnipotent.
I’ve been doing that a lot lately, contradicting myself, I mean, especially the last chapter. That little comment I made about Primus being a side character and referencing myself as a maincharactert was, safe to say, weird. I don’t want to be a main character, not one bit, so I really don’t know why I said that.
What I do know is that it wasn’t a good thing to say because it was just mean and also goes against my main goal. I shouldn’t have said that, should’ve told him to shut up in another way.
Whatever, that isn’t a relevant topic right now.
Going back to what I’m actually supposed to be thinking about, how is this exactly going to work?
“I’m glad you asked that child,” Primus breaks my line of thought, his tone proud.
“Let me guess, it has to do with a little something called ‘becoming op’ or something similar.”
“...?”
“Overpowered. Gaining non-human abilities. Becoming a real-life superhero or whatever.”
He looks very disappointed. I now feel bad.
Eh, whatever, back to scolding this fucker. “Listen, pal, I love you- well, not really, but I think you’re cool. Even though I think that, there’s no way I’m just gonna use some random fix-it solution like that. It’s stupid, would puteveryone'ss attention on me, and not let me live a peaceful life.”
Like, seriously, I’m not about to go out there, get a band-aid solution of becominy op randomly, and fix everything. No, that is stupid and wouldn’t help. Well, it would help right now, but in the long run soooo many things would be screwed over. Like I would absolutely get hunted down by the government or the Con’s or maybe even the Autobots (not all of them, but maybe some). Think of it like this: Some random kid that you barely know, not to mention they’re not even the same species as you, gets your ggod'sabilities. I don’t know about you, but I’d be pissed off.
This isn’t some trashy fanfic where Y/N suddenly gets overpowered and just fixes everything. While this is a trashy fic, there is no Y/N. This is my life, and it just doesn’t work like that.
“I can respect that choic,e child.” His tone indicates that he’s upset about ,it and to that I say ‘bro can suck it’.
Or I just die afinallyaly move on to the afterlife. That’s also an option that’s been brewing for 13 years. Can you tell that I’m more than okay with that being a thing?
The god cuts in again, “You shall not meet your end yet,;I refuse to allow it.” He states like it’s a promise.
“Alright, well, what’s your plan then? And, remember, no superpowers or solutions that are pulled out of your ass. I’d rather die than deal with that shit.”
He nods before standing up and- oh boy, kinda forgot how big this dude is, even in his nnon-planetform. He could probably crush me with a thought if he tried hard enough; that’s how much space he takes up. “The solution of ‘super powers’ was, in fact, my original plan. I would’ve been able to supply you with a small amount of my power. It would’ve, I’ll admit, made you very similar to me, just on a smaller scale.”
Great, we just love forcing the child who you’re trying to get to do your dirty work become a copy of you. That’s just the best idea, isn’t it!
Please note the sarcasm here.
“Yes, yes, I now see that wasn’t the best course of action, especially for a being like you.” The hell does that mean? “However, if you truly don’t want that, then the process might become much more painful.”
“Okay, and?”
“And it’ll hurt.”
“As expected- do you just think I’m stupid or what? I’m going back into a body that just exploded, if it didn’t hurt, I’d be baffled.” Not to mention it’ll be significantly worse if I didn’t feel extreme pain. It would mean my nerves and stuff are fried or gone, and that really isn’t a good thing.
I look up at him for a few more second,s and he stares at me. Well, it doesn’t feel like he’s staring at me, just through me, like he’s hardcordissociatingng. I wanna do that right now. Dealing with all of this stuff isn’t fun.
God, why am I dealing with all of this mildly angsty stuff?
Anywho, why is hedissociatingg? I get the feeling of complete and utter disappointment, like he’s completely done with my bull shit.
“...Child, you might just be getting on my ‘nerves’.” He says with a smile. Why the hell is bro smiling at tha?. Frown hoe, frown.
“I can tell.”
If he could, he’d face plam right now, but I don’t think he knows what that is. Also, quick side note, I love how my relationship with him is developing. Like, bro is a god, and the current biggest pain in his aft is the human child he demanded do his dirty work.
Speaking of which, what happened to that plan?
“You’re still going to complete that task.”
“Damit.”
“Child-” He lets out a sigh before putting his hands together like he’s praying for me to cooperate.Joke'ss on him, I won’t. A smile, one that seems a little bit more forced than beforefinallyly), shows on his features. “Since you’ve already accepted the physical pain, I think you’ll be ready. Remember to grab the cube child, I- we need it.”
“What-”
My vision goes blurry again, and I’m plunged into darkness. Damn, I really just pissed off a god. Good, he deserves it for putting me through this shit.