Chapter Text
When Charlie was twelve years old, he would have been crowned king.
It had been a year since his father had fallen ill, and the state of his health had been a debate amongst the country, the palace staff, but above all, the royal family. Everyone held hope, regardless of their status, title, where they worked, everything. It was, without a doubt, the largest event that had brought the country together in decades. George was a beloved man, king, husband, and father, loved by all not only throughout the country, but also the world.
The news had come early that morning, and the world itself seemed to crack into pieces. In an instant, the world shifted into one of a dark abyss that only held the unknown.
Charlie Everett Hollow would have been crowned king that day, had it not been for a simple law passed by one of his ancestors centuries prior.
No heir, man or woman, may ascend the throne unless they are married, at which time , the power will be split between the two evenly.
And Chase was far too young to marry. Queen Myra, even amidst her grief, refused to entertain the idea even the slightest. He was still a child, and no child should ever have to worry nor consider such a monumental responsibility, not to mention ascending the throne to become king.
The Queen, instead, had chosen to take full responsibility as monarch, the sole ruler of the country, a practice that, while not unheard of in the country of Celestia, was uncommon. The position was known to carry a heavy weight, and those who did rule solely were historically recorded to have died only a short few years into their reign. Perhaps, some had seen it as a sign of weakness, or maybe ruling an entire country was difficult.
But Queen Myra was determined, for everyone knew she would not remarry, and she would do everything she could to delay her son rushing into any marriage. No matter the cost, the price, or the risks, she will give her son time.
And she hoped that time would be on their side.
But the queen, despite her hopes, began to show a decline in her heath just over two years after her husband’s death. She did her best to conceal her pain, and for a while, it worked; she hid her grief and aches under her sleeves well. But it could only last for so long, and soon enough, The Court had caught on to her ailing health.
Myra did her best, but despite it all, she felt she had failed her son.
-ˋˏ ༻`♡´༺ ˎˊ-
Despite only being fourteen at this point, Chase’s life was already filled to the brim with etiquette lessons, homework regarding accounts, public speaking lessons, diplomacy, the history of Celestia, and so much more. And he never once complained, at least not in public. He was to be king, after all. There was no point in fighting against one’s destiny, after all.
Free time for him certainly was not rare, but it felt like it was. When one’s day is filled with schooling, assignments, learning the right spoons to use, and being given projects such as, “Celestia is close friends with Country A, and are currently trying to form a relationship with Country B, of which they have tense relations with until recently. One day, Country A decides to cut all trades with Country B. As the king, what would be the best course of action to take to ensure a positive relationship with both countries?” It became overwhelming most of the time, and even four hours of free time did not feel enough.
This, however, was one of his rare days off. Deacon Everett Hollow, Chase’s cousin, and the future Duke of Sugar Springs, had fiercely fought for his cousin to have more days off from his royal education. Charlie was only fourteen, he arguedwould make him sick at this rate.
But Charlie was no fool. Try as he may to deny such things, there was only one reason he could think of for why The Court was pushing such lessons onto him. Though he tried his best not to think about why, he wasn’t sure if he was ready for such a responsibility yet.
Chase had just flipped through another page of the book he was reading. well, reading was quite a strong word. He read every day; it was required of him for the future title of King; however, that did not mean he enjoyed it. Most of the time, like now, he used books to make himself appear busy, decreasing the likelihood of being bothered or being lectured for being lazy.
Despite being lost in his own thoughts, he was still aware enough to hear the knock on his door. Three gentle knocks, a signature of his personal, well, not entirely personal but one day he would be, valet, Autumn.
Chase sighed as he mentally prepared himself for whatever news was to come, “Come in.”
With a soft squeak, the door opened, and a young man with light brown hair with a hint of red and brown eyes came in. Autumn had been born in the castle by a trusted maid just four years prior to Chase’s own birth, and as the years went on, Autumn and Charlie had grown closer. Enough so, that the queen herself appointed Autumn as the one-day personal butler for the future king. In a way, the two shared a bit of they were both being prepared for a title and job that held immense responsibility.
“Your Highness.” He walked in a little awkwardly and bowed. He stood there for a moment before he cleared his throat, “Her Majesty and The Court require your presence.”
Chase felt his heart go rigid he set the book down, and it took every strength in him to tear his eyes away from the words to rest on the young man before him. His throat went dry, “Do you know why?”
Autumn tried to stand taller, “No, Your Highness. But I have… heard talks.”
“Of what?”
Autumn shifted, a motion that would have been seen as unprofessional if either of them held their future titles, “A woman, a, uh, a princess, specifically.”
Okay, don’t panic. That didn’t… Necessarily mean what Chase didn’t want it to mean. It didn’t mean anything; it was just a girl; it didn’t mean…. It didn’t mean anything! He was only fourteen years old, after all, and Chase desperately tried not to think about the fact that younger heirs had been married off.
“Of course,” Is what he said instead, “Let them know I’ll be there in a moment.”
“Of course, sir.” Autumn bowed once more, then he turned to leave the room; his face was conflicted as he closed the door.
Chase let his shoulders slump when the door closed: he tilted his head to the ceiling and took a deep breath. He needed to calm down his heart before he stepped out; he adjusted his sleeves as he began to count from one to ten. He closed his book, stood up, and walked over to the door; his hand hovered over the door, his heart and thoughts racing.
Is this really okay?
No answer came when Charlie opened the door and walked out of his bedroom.
-ˋˏ ༻`♡´༺ ˎˊ-
Chase never liked going inside the courtroom; the room always felt rigid and cruel, as though it was a place he did not belong. His mother did her best to reassure him that it was simply because he was so young, and that much like his role, he would grow into the room. He would grow into the chair his father once sat in, and he would grow into the man, the person, he was meant to be.
But truthfully, Chase had no idea who that person was supposed to be.
He stared at the tall, long, marble-looking doors; his gaze traced the complicated symbols that were carved into the door, the symbols that represented his family, the emblems that symbolized the royal family, the monarchy, the Hollows, the crown itself.
He told himself he would be ready one day to carry the role.
He didn’t know if he believed himself.
The doors opened with a long creaking sound, and they revealed a plain-looking room. A round desk stood in front of him at the opposite end of the room; each seat was taken by men and women alike in The Court. In the center of it all, there were two seats. One remained empty, as it had been for two years, and the other was occupied by his mother. She sat straight; her hair cascaded down her shoulders, half of it tied up into a beautiful bun; a simple yet elegant crown rested on her head. Her hands rested on the desk, perfectly clasped over one another, but despite the regality, her very being emitted, her eyes looked tired, and the greys in her hair were clear.
The Court members, with the exception of his mother, stood and bowed to Charlie; they then took their seats once more.
Charlie bowed to his mom, “Mother, you called for me?”
Myra nodded, “Yes, there is something we would like to discuss with you.”
“Your Highness,” One of the members began, “As you know, you cannot ascend the throne without a partner.”
Charlie nodded as he swallowed a lump in his throat, “Nor can I ascend the throne until I am at least eighteen.” It was a subtle but futile attempt to delay what he feared.
They nodded in response, their blonde hair falling past their shoulders, “Yes, you are not yet eligible to become king, even if you were married. Which is a… Position and responsibility we do not wish to rush.”
Charlie held his head high and clenched his jaw, “But it’s why I’m here, correct?”
Jai held their head and continued speaking, “Yes…”
Lee shifted in her seat. “Your Highness,” Her voice was so soft for such a strict topic, “Trust us when we say it was not an easy decision to make. But the country, and the crown is in a… Very delicate position right now. And we think it best—”
“Oh please,” A much older man of The Court interrupted, “The boy is not a child—”
“Legally, he is, he is fourteen—” Orla, one of the younger members of The Court interrupted, and the older man stumbled on his words for a moment.
“That is not what I meant.”
“But it is what you said.”
“It was not my intention to say he wasn’t—”
“Enough!” Queen Myra’s voice boomed through the room, it echoed and bounced off the walls, and it was filled with sternness. Charlie hid his flinch by squeezing his shoulders together, he held his hands tighter. He knew his mother’s tone was not directed towards him, but it was still nerve-racking to hear her enter, what he affectionately called, monarch mode.
The Queen’s head tilted down, and she cleared her throat, “Forgive my tone, but we do not have the time for such bickering.” She glanced back to Charlie, and her face and tone softened, “Charlie, I do not wish to hide anything from you. As such, I am going to be frank with you.” She seemed to sit up straighter and push her thumbs together. It was a tick of hers that Chase had learned she does when she’s nervous. “Charlie, The Court has expressed concerns regarding my health as of late, something of which, you are aware of.”
Charlie nodded, though he did his best not to think about it; his mother’s ailing health was a constant worry on his mind. It plagued his every thought, his every being, every waking moment—it even tormented him during his dreams. Dreams that echoed with memories of his father’s death as though they were a thick fog that covered every inch of the world. Dreams that transitioned and warped into one where Autumn and Deacon ran in to tell him…
Chase didn’t get much sleep on the nights when he had those nightmares.
Myra glanced at Jai, who nodded at their queen, “Your Highness, we think it may be best if we set up an… Arranged marriage of sorts between you and Princess Silver from Clé. This would guarantee you to ascend the crown when you are eighteen or when you are ready.”
Charlie did not allow his head to falter; rather, he tilted it higher and clenched his jaw. He knew this day would come sooner or later, but truly, he had thought he would at least have a few more years until then. Charlie cleared his throat, “When would the wedding take place?”
“That is one of the reasons we brought you here today.” Dan, one of the younger members of The Court spoke up. He opened a list of logs that laid out in front of him, “We have been in talks with the Monarch of Clé, Ruler Ruby, regarding the engagement. And we think it best if we present it in a natural way to public.”
Chase scrunched his nose, “I fear I do not follow.”
Myra straightened her back, and Chase’s eyes landed on his mother without a second thought, “Charlie, this engagement would be handled very delicately; the country… Our people need something to reassure them, especially once news of my health reaches them. Should you and the princess accept this proposal, you both will officially become engaged.” The queen glanced at some documents to her side, before returning to Charlie—it was a tactic she did to regain her thoughts, “However, it would not be announced to the public, not for quite a few years.”
Not… What?
“Why not? You said it so yourself that our people need reassurance.”
Myra nodded, “Yes, they do, but… I do not believe they would react all that well to hearing the crowned prince has been set in an arranged marriage. I will admit it is an old practice; the people of Mariora did not react well when King Ravenell announced his arranged engagement to Lady Idonea. Their feelings have only shifted due to Lady Idonea’s kind nature and presence.” Queen Myra paused as she contemplated her next few words, “As such, we think it best if we do not announce the engagement, but rather, that we present it in a natural way.”
That… made sense. Charlie remembered reading about the protests that emerged in Mariora when their king announced his arranged engagement to Lady Idonea. Not because she wasn’t of royal descent, but because it was arranged. They felt as though both parties should have a say on their life, and who they should marry. Idonea’s nature was the only thing that brought the people back to a somewhat balanced sense. And now, excitement and pride filled the people at the royal wedding that was due in less than a week.
It was the first wedding Chase had ever been invited to, and it would also be his first time riding in a plane or even visiting another country.
“Your Highness,” Inco nodded their head for a moment when her eyes met Chase’s, “Should you accept this proposal, you two will not interact in person for quite some time, with the exception of His Majesty, King Ravenell’s wedding, of course. Rather, around the age of eighteen to twenty-one, we will invite Her Highness and one of her siblings to chaperone her during our social season. There, you will appear as though you are courting her, slowly growing closer, until we reach a proposal. Ignoring the fact that at that point, you two will have been well engaged for quite some time of course.”
Chase swallowed a lump, “A fairytale romance.”
Inco nodded slowly, “Yes, Your Highness, a fairytale romance.”
Chase… didn’t know what to think. He wanted to say no, his heart was screaming at him to say no, his future was begging him to decline. His life, his hopes, his dreams, every part of him that made up his life, was sobbing no. He wanted to say no, he should have said no.
But his father came to mind, and then his mother did. And he remembered how they laughed, how they smiled, how they danced together at the balls and parties they hosted. How despite it all, despite the stress of ruling a country, they sought joy in one another. How alone his mother was, her hair thinning, her skin paling, and the coughs he heard from down the hall.
He thought of his mom, all she had done for him, how much she meant to him.
He could not live without her; he could not do this without her.
He needed her, he couldn’t lose her just yet.
So, Charlie swallowed, he ignored the dryness in his throat, he looked away from his past, he let go of his future and all the hopes that were carried with it.
And Charlie agreed, because to him, there was no alternative.
-ˋˏ ༻`♡´༺ ˎˊ-
Chase couldn’t concentrate on his book anymore, his mind filled with Princess Silver and his new engagement, of the future that was set in stone and all but written for him. The words before him simply existed, birthed into the world, yet unable to come to life.
How did… How did it come to this…?
He knew of Princess Silver, of course; she was the most popular and youngest princess in Clé, her home country. He heard of her kindness and her beauty, how her people adored her so fiercely—he heard her smile was so bright that it could melt the heart of anyone. Charlie, despite being so young, knew she would make a wonderful princess of Celestia and a perfect queen.
His only gripe, aside from his lack of attraction to women, was her age.
Charlie was fourteen years old; the princess, his fiancé, was eighteen. A grown woman, one he would one day marry, one he had not even met yet.
He knew, of course, the wedding itself would not take place until he was at least eighteen. And yet, she was…
He believed in the words of her kindness, but he could not make peace with their age gap.
A glass plate was placed in front of him carefully, a gloved hand holding the edge of it. Chase traced the glove up the sleeve to see Autumn, whose face was scrunched with worry. The plate carried a slice of red velvet cake, one that was obviously snuck away from the kitchen and into his room. One that Chase knew he would see again at dinner that night. Its content was gluten-free, as was the standard for most, if not, all deserts in the palace due to the heir’s celiac.
Chase hadn’t even asked him to bring him anything.
“Thank you, Autumn.”
Autumn retracted his hand, and it returned to his side, “Of course, Your Highness. I am… Only a ring away if you need me.” He bowed deeply, but he froze for a moment, his eyes scattered around the floor as though he was weighing his options before he bowed once more and turned to leave.
“You may stay,” Chase whispered; he dared not look at his friend, but he knew he had paused, “If you so wish.”
“Of course, Your Highness.” He bowed; Chase did not need to look at him to know he bowed.
Autumn accompanied him in silence; Chase stared at the cake Autumn had sneaked to him. He should eat it, lest he leave the evidence behind and risk getting his friend in trouble, but the simple thought of consuming anything made his stomach turn.
The doors flew open with a loud creek, and in stomped Deacon, Chase’s cousin, and the one-day Duke of Sugar Springs.
“Deacon?” Chase stood up, as Autumn quickly turned and bowed.
“Lord Hollow.” Autumn stated as he rose back up.
“You!” The young lord pointed at the crowned prince, and began walking towards him, “Tell me you did not agree! Tell me that you said no!”
“Deacon—”
“Chase Everett Hollow! You better tell me that you denied such an… Absurd proposal!”
Charlie didn’t look away; he kept his eyes locked onto Deacon’s; his head held tall; he squared his shoulders and held his hands tighter. He did not utter a single word; he did not need to. For Deacon’s eyes began to widen as pure fury began to grow in them.
“Chase—”
“I know you are disappointed in me.”
“Tell me you did not—”
“I did what I had to do. It was my choice to make, and I made my choice.”
“You are fourteen, Chase! You shouldn’t even be having to make a decision like that!”
“But I am, and I did.” Keep your composure, Charlie; he cannot lose himself right now. Charlie glanced down at his hands. He picked under the dull nails on his hands. “I am not in a… Position to not make decisions like this, Deacon.” He looked back at his cousin, whose face held tremendous sorrow, “I am to be King one day, Deacon. And I would prefer for that day to be sooner, rather than later due to mother’s… Condition. A condition, I fear, is only growing worse.” He sniffled, glanced at the floor for a moment, and closed his eyes before looking back up, “I will do anything for mom, even if… Small sacrifices need to be made.”
The room fell into silence; a grandfather clock in the hall released a muffled chime. Charlie did not look at Deacon, but his eyes landed on Autumn, who Charlie caught watching the two cousins before swiftly turning his eyes away once he was caught.
“Chase—”
“I will be fine, cousin.”
“I am not upset at you; I am upset at The Court—!”
“The Court did what is necessary to ensure Mom’s health.”
“It’s stupid! She is eighteen! You are a child!”
“Deacon—”
“No! Chase, with all due respect, I am going to be honest—”
“Being honest is going to get you in trouble.”
“And so will lying to myself and to others.” Their eyes met; Deacon’s filled with a darkness of anger and intensity. It made the back of Charlie’s neck become hot, and he was forced to swallow an awful lump in his throat.
Charlie glanced over to Autumn, who did not yet have that refined skill of an unreadable expression that the other palace staff had mastered. His eyebrows were furrowed, a hint of concern and confusion in his eyes.
“Autumn, may you leave us?”
Autumn opened his mouth to argue, but Charlie narrowed his eyes and tilted his head. Truthfully, he did not so much enjoy having to use his status and power to accomplish goals. Even if it was something simple, yet destructive enough such as a secret.
Autumn held his tongue, nodded, bowed, and turned to walk out of the room, but Chase knew he would merely stand outside the door, as though a guard meant to watch over him.
Charlie dropped everything, the façade, the barely concealed hint of worry, everything. His hands fell to his sides as Chase stepped forward and looked at his cousin gravely, “Deacon you need to watch your tongue. You cannot say things like that in front of other people.”
“I speak the truth, Chase.”
“Yes, but the truth is not meant to be heard by everyone!” Chase hissed through his teeth; he rubbed his hands on his face and took a step back. “Apologies, for raising my voice.” He muttered through his hands; his voice was muffled. He ran his hand through his hair, causing it to be briefly combed back. “I’m just… I’m so tired.” He cried lightly as he tilted his head to the sky. Footsteps echoed in the room and grew in volume as distance was closed, and arms were wrapped around him.
Deacon held his cousin tightly as small tears prickled in the corners of his eyes. His breathing turned shaky as he sniffled and held Chase tighter.
“I will be fine.” Chase’s voice was muffled, and Deacon held him tighter.
“You’re not fine.”
“But I need to be.” He shut his eyes as something wet threatened to spill, “I can’t be anything else; I have to be this.”
“Being something you are not is going to kill you, Chase. Maybe not literally, but it will kill you on the inside.”
“I need to be. I need to… I must make everyone else believe in the person I present myself as. I cannot afford to be anything else.” Charlie opened his eyes, “This is… All I can afford to be.”
-ˋˏ ༻`♡´༺ ˎˊ-
Chase was twelve years old when he realized he was gay.
It had only been a month since his father had died, and the grief was still fresh in his heart. His people, though not required to wear black, still chose to do so, as they, too, were mourning. He still wandered through the halls, awaiting his father to call upon him to teach him a valuable lesson regarding the crown, to ask him to take a walk with him through the gardens and simply talk about how their days had been.
Truthfully, Chase missed everything about his father; he simply missed him being there. The comfort he had once held, knowing his father was no longer upstairs, or waiting past the doors to the dining room, was gone. To know that his father was not there left a deep hollow hole in him.
Chase had not even done anything; he was simply lying in his bed and thinking about his father. His hugs, his voice, how he held Chase’s hand and guided him in this journey called life. It was only then that Charlie began to think about the crown, the future of it, and how he would have to marry someone to ascend.
He began to imagine his future wife and queen and what she would be like. He hoped she would be kind and loving, someone the country would adore. Whoever she was, she needed to be headstrong and know how to run a country. But above all, Chase hoped they would be someone he would love, someone who loved him truly and deeply. Someone who would stand by his side and choose him over and over again. Someone who matched him perfectly on a throne, in the center of a ballroom, and in his hands. That he would hold Chase in his hands and love him every day.
It was with a startling jolt in his heart when he realized that the person he pictured standing next to him on the throne was no queen at all, but rather, a king.
The first, and only person he told, of course, was—
-ˋˏ ༻`♡´༺ ˎˊ-
“Deacon,” Chase whispered as he sat against the wall next to Deacon, “Tell me some good news today… How your day was, whatever, I need… I just need something good right now…”
Deacon only nodded, “I uh…” He coughed and a small smile grew on his face, “I made a friend.”
A smile grew on Chase’s face as well, “Deacon Everett Hollow made a friend? All by himself? I’m so proud of you.” His head landed on his cousin’s shoulder, “What are they like?”
Deacon took in a deep breath, “They’re… Funny, and they seem nice. I like them.”
“That’s good.”
They fell back into a peaceful silence the two merely sat there for a moment, never uttering a single word. It was only broken briefly when Deacon held out his hand Chase stared at it for a moment before clasping it in his hands. They had not held hands in years, yet, here, it spoke for something else. They squeezed their hands together as an unspoken bond that could not be broken so easily. Deacon leaned his head onto Chase’s head, and they held one another, as best friends, cousins, and brothers.
“I’m scared.” Chase confessed to the world, nothing more than the brush of a whisper. Yet still, it reached Deacon’s ears; it filled his heart with pain for the future.
“I know,” Deacon whispered back, “I’m sorry.”
“I’m… Going to try to start liking girls.”
“It doesn’t work that way, Chase.”
“I know, but…”
“Everything will be fine; you will be fine.” He squeezed Chase’s hand, “Everything will work out in the end. It always does, somehow, some way.”
“Finding joy in other things.” He felt Deacon nod, “I didn’t want that—I wanted… I wanted to love every aspect of my life. Not… Be forced to find tiny details. I wanted… I wanted to marry a…”
“You still can,” Deacon whispered, “It has only been a few hours; word has not yet reached Clé.”
Charlie shook his head as tears prickled through the corners of his eyes. “I can’t,” His voice shook and cracked, “That would take too long. Even if we start now, Mom would… It’s just too much. Nothing would confirm I would like any suitor she brings, nor does it… Guarantee we will stay together.” Chase swallowed a lump in his throat, “This, is the safest option, this is my only option.”
Charlie’s eyes glistened as his future was built before him, “I have to do it; the sooner I get married, the sooner mom can step down and get better.”