Chapter Text
Hyuna was a party girl through and through. She knew people, she knew how to get around. From all of her years partying at the craziest frat parties, wildest college parties, and multiple hook-ups; it all got kind of bland after awhile. Close around the tail-end of her sophomore year, everything muddled out. Hyuna surrounded herself with like minded people who shared the same values as her: to live life and have fun. However, her studies got in the way amidst the heat of it all. She understood that school came first but she yearned for connection. Something she had dreamt of for years. Everyone liked "party-girl Hyuna" but they never truly reached out to know her. She liked being in the center of attention but felt so disconnected from her own peers. Her male peers would treat her as eye candy, making sure she'd always be on their radar, regardless of Hyuna's personal attraction to them. Girls would snare their eyes at the subtle mention of Hyuna. She herself didn't know why everything changed- she thought that they liked her. She wasn't sure why she was even doing this in the first place.
It is no secret that she drunkenly make-out with the nearest guy or chick. Whoever she could get her hands on was hers for the night. It was one after the other. It was just the way how things went, in her mind at least. Hyuna never went as far as to know their names, all it took was a few drinks and a lazy libido activated by alcohol and weed to kick start the engine. There were multiple occasions where she got cross-faded and slept with whomever she could find. This night wasn't particularly unique. Lost in dazy confusion, she got dressed, packed her things and quietly left her side of the stranger's bed. She peeped over her shoulder, noticing the wrinkles of the sheets that clung to her the rest of the night. The small glint in her eyes faded. She knew she had no one. She turned her back and walked away. On her way back to her dorm, a slight vibration tickled the side of hip.
"Hyuna."
"what do you wantttt, it's only 10 in the morning get off my ass"
"Hello? Where were you last night?? You were suppose to be in class like an hour ago."
"ugh.. just leave me be i dont fucking care hyun woo. at least be grateful im awake at this hour."
"Jesus Hyuna, where the hell are you? Do you even know where you are right now? Seriously, tell me."
"whatever the professor can suck my dick for all i care. just get back to class, i'll see you soon love yaaaa bye"
"Hyuna wait-" Beep.
Hyuna cast a glance at the long list of missed calls Hyun-Woo had left her the night before, asking her where she had been. She knew he cared but Hyuna didn't want to talk to him. He knew she had problems, he knew she didn't want to solve them, but he still cared to ask and check up on her.
I just don't understand why I can't just live my lifeee. can he like just leave me alone he knows he cant do anything about it. Her grogginess messed with her thought-process- she knew she didn't mean it but she was incredibly pissed someone even thought to ask her if she was okay. Hyun-woo knew not to ask her, every intervention led to nowhere so why ask?
She felt around her pockets for a cigarette and a lighter,
"Damnit, I left my lighter at that bum's dorm. Guess I won't be seeing that shit again."
Without knowing where she was, she scattered around campus grounds. Knowing her friends were probably asleep, in class, or somewhere in someone's bed, she knew it wasn't a good call to ask them about what had happened last night. God forbid she kept a track of what she did at all. On a whim, Hyuna checks her phone a second time to scroll through her notifications. While checking, she came to the guttural realization that no one else had bothered to check up on her.
Why am i so disgusting. nobody fucking cares about me except for my own brother. i bet they didnt even know i was there with them last night. what the fuck is wrong with me. Her head was still pounding from her terrible decisions. Whoever thought using beer as a chaser was a good idea? No sober person would dare to willingly drink beer, let alone use it as a chaser.
After what felt like an entirety, Hyuna stumbles on top of a nearby bench. Not too far away from her dorm. Perfect. The sun kissed her flushed cheeks and aggravated her headache. Her legs were spread out as if she was reserving a spot for her so-called friends. Her head tossed back, using her shoulder as a cushion.
"God. What a life," Hyuna chuckled to herself, "I wonder what would Hyun-woo would say if he saw me here… Maybe he'd scold me and lung me back to my dorm. I kinda feel bad for him now that I think about it but hey, it's his fault for trying." The pit in her stomach grew. She couldn't believe she was even saying these things about her own brother. She knew he cared but she didn't want help but she didn't know why.
"Ugh. I need a shower."