Chapter Text
Narumi Gen wakes up to a rhythmic beeping, and a burning sensation in his eyes. He can’t open them, but the texture brushing over his twitching eyelids clues him in on the bandages keeping him in the dark.
He remembers Kafka delivering the final blow of the battle, but everything that follows is a blur. He must’ve passed out shortly after.
A gentle breeze caresses his skin. An open window. Footsteps in the hallway.
The medical wing.
He feels his muscles twitch as he slowly wakes his slumbering body, and he sighs as the aches make themselves known. So much for a gentle awakening. A gasp and a rustling of clothes reveals that he isn't alone in the room. He waits for them to reveal their identity, even though he’s fairly certain he knows who is by his bedside.
A lithe hand cautiously grabs his hand, and the unmistakable voice of Shinomiya Kikoru hesitantly pipes up.
“Narumi?”
He squeezes her hand softly. “Still kicking,” he rasps out. Then, he waits for the barrage of insults to wash over him.
What he doesn’t expect is the sound of a sob, and a weight crashing down on his chest as hands scramble to hold him in a desperate hug. “You weren’t waking up,” she whispers shakily, voice muffled by the fabric of his hospital gown.
Ah, he thinks. He's reminded that she doesn’t have anything left. That he, at some point, has turned into someone she leans on.
He brings a sluggish hand to her head, blindly carding his fingers through her hair. “Sorry for scaring you, kiddo,” he says and earns a smack on his chest for his effort.
“I wasn’t scared, moron,” she hisses. “You just can’t die before I’ve beaten your ass.” The words are gruff, but the effect is greatly diminished by the shakiness of her voice, and the fact that she hasn’t moved from the hug.
“Sure,” he agrees, and brings his other arm up to hold her, while pointedly ignoring the wet patch on his chest and the way she presses into his fingers carding through her hair like a cat. He’ll tease her about it later, when the wounds aren’t as fresh.
“If you tell anyone about this, I’m going to kill you,” Kikoru tells him, as if reading his thoughts.
He huffs out a breathy laugh. “I’d like to see you try,” he taunt with a smug smile on his face.
She mutters insults under her breath, and smacks him again. There’s a pause, and then he feels the slow smirk spreading on her face against his chest. Fuck, he thinks. He wonders what information she has acquired that makes her this smug. Worries for his own sanity.
“What,” he says in a deadpan tone.
Kikoru gets up from the embrace and has the audacity to giggle.
“I just remembered what you said out on the battlefield, right before you passed out,” she says in a sing-song voice. “Don’t you remember?”
She’s mocking him.
And the thing is, he has no idea what she’s referring to. Everything at the end blurs together. He had seen too much, too many possibilities, in such a short span of time. He had pushed his body so far beyond its limits, and by the end, the aftershocks had started creeping up on him.
He doesn’t remember what he did or didn’t say.
“What,” he repeats, tone growing insistent.
Gen tries to not flinch when Kikoru suddenly pokes him in the side. He can’t see, and she’s very capable of moving without sound.
“So, you don’t remember asking Vice Captain Hoshina out on a date?”
His brain comes to a record-scratch halt.
He stops breathing.
“What?” He once again repeats, but this time, his voice cracks.
Kikoru laughs. She laughs loudly.
“It was adorable,” she tells him, still chuckling.
Indignation rises in his chest. “I’m not adorable,” he insists, offended.
“Sure,” she says, and pats him on the arm. “Well, your comms link was still open when you called him hot and asked for a date, so I had the chance to look over just in time to see you pass out in his arms.”
Gen opens his mouth, and finds that he has no words.
“Well, I gotta go tell the nurses you woke up,” Kikoru says, and then she actually just leaves.
Gen’s still gaping in baffled confusion when nurses and doctors burst into the room to check his vitals, run tests and ask him endless questions. He tries to focus on the task at hand, but in the back of his mind he can’t help but hope that Kikoru has lied to him.
He tries to shut up the part of his mind that isn’t at all surprised to find that the battle-high version of himself had blurted out something like that. That part knows for certain his dumbass of a disciple has told him the truth.
Right before he drifts off, he realizes Shinomiya didn’t bother telling him how Hoshina reacted to his alleged confession.
Shit, he thinks as the world fades.
***
The impact of Kafka’s punch reverberates through the battlefield, and makes Gen stagger. In his ears, the Operators confirm the status of the destroyed core, and cheers of victory rings out in the comms and around him.
It’s over.
His bruised and bleeding body is aching, and he feels himself swaying on his feet. Right before he topples over, an arm loops around him and holds him up. His vision blurs momentarily, and he glances to his side.
The tired face of Hoshina Soushirou greets him, and the Vice Captain gives him a toothy grin. Gen squints at him, uncomprehending. He’s sparred with the other man countless times, but he has never been so close without the cover of violence and animosity.
“We’re a pretty damn kickass team,” Hoshina tells him, and then smirks. “When you’re not being a whiny brat, that is.”
The setting sun is casting a halo around the other man’s messy purple hair, and Gen feels the floodgates of his deepest desires open. Has no way of stopping them when the man that haunts his dreams holds him close and smiles at him like that.
“Fuck, you’re so hot,” he blurts out. Voice slurring and cracking. “Should let me take you out on a date or somethin’..” he trails off and feels his knees buckle.
The last thing he sees is Hoshina Soushirou’s eyes blown wide open in shock.
“Narumi!” A voice shouts.
***
Gen wakes again, this time reluctantly.
So, Kikoru wasn’t lying after all.
Antiseptic smell meets his noise, and the heart monitor settles down as he wakes up. His eyes are feeling better, a soothing cold compress lying across his face. He’s still in the medical wing.
When he tries to move his hand, he realizes it’s entangled in a warm grasp.
This hand is larger than Kikoru’s, and calloused in a way that only years of unrelenting training would cause. A thumb rubs a gentle circle on the back of his hand.
“I can tell you’re awake, Captain,” Hoshina Soushirou drawls.
Gen’s breath catches in his throat, and he grimaces. “Come to gloat that you got out of the med-wing before me, bowl cut?” He sneers, attempting to hide his nerves behind a familiar facade of hostility.
Hoshina’s thumb keeps rubbing his hand, and Gen’s certain he’s going to lose his mind. He can’t see the expression the other man is making, bandages still keeping his eyes closed.
The Vice Captain huffs out a breath that almost sounds like a laugh. It also sounds shaky, or maybe that’s wishful thinking.
“Y’know, Shinomiya told me ya don’t remember what ya said out there,” Hoshina says in a conversational tone. At that, Gen tenses involuntarily, and he knows that the other man doesn’t miss it. He knows, because Hoshina’s thumb comes to a stand-still, and his grip tightens slightly.
“But that ain’t true is it?” The man whispers.
Gen winces. He’s almost relieved he can’t see the no-doubt smug expression on the Vice Captain’s face. He’s never living this down.
He takes his loss without kicking and screaming for the first time in his life, and instead tries to take a deep breath through the tightness of his chest.
“You can just say no,” he sighs, and tries to keep his voice even. “Take your chance to laugh when I can’t even see your smug smile.”
The silence from Hoshina is suffocating, and Gen waits for the rejection with a heavy heart. From their interactions through the years, it makes absolutely no sense for Hoshina Soushirou to feel an inkling of affection for him.
It’s his fault entirely for falling into an one-sided obsession with the one person that would never look his way.
“So ya actually meant it,” Hoshina says after much too long, voice quiet and without a hint of amusement.
Gen grits his teeth, and doesn’t respond. The silence is a confirmation in itself. He’s not cowardly enough to attempt to take back his words.
He feels the Vice Captain let go of his hand, and tries to not let the sting of rejection show up on his face.
He almost jumps out of his skin when the barely-there touch of fingertips appear on his neck, and gently trail up to his face. The same calloused hand cups his cheek, tender in a way no one has been with him for as long as he remembers.
“D’ya really think I’d be cruel enough to laugh at ya?” Hoshina’s thumb brushes soft patterns right below the bandage, and Gen swallows through a thick throat. Before he has a chance to come up with a response, another hand covers his mouth.
“I just wanted to check in on ya, make sure you’re still kickin’,” Hoshina says in a serene voice. “If ya still feel the same when you’re back on your feet, please ask me again.”
Quicker than he can process, the hand covering Gen’s mouth disappears and is replaced with the chaste press of a pair of lips.
“See you later, Gen,” Hoshina’s breath ghosts over his lips as he whispers. Then the Vice Captain stands and promptly leaves the room, leaving Gen dumbstruck and reeling.
When he’s certain he’s alone, Gen slowly lifts a hand to his mouth and touches his lips. He’s inclined to believe he dreamt the entire thing up.
“What the fuck,” he whispers into the silence of the now-empty room.
***
After a couple of agonizingly slow days, Narumi is finally discharged after promising to not use RT-001 for at least two weeks. He’s still unstable, and only a moment of use could put him right back in the medical wing. Hasegawa reluctantly hands back his phone, when the doctors confirm he’s cleared to look at screens again.
He’s had a constant influx of visitors during his bed rest, and yet Hoshina Soushirou never returns. Gen swears it doesn’t bother him, not even when he finally has packed up and gets to return to his quarters.
It’s when Gen is walking, scrolling through the endless texts, missed social media updates and news, that he sees it. A single recent text from the man who has been haunting his every waking moment. His dreams as well, technically.
[12:47] Unknown: Heard you got discharged. Welcome back. /HS
Gen takes a deep breath as he stares at the message, willing it to change form to confirm his growing madness. No matter how many times he has mentally replayed the interaction with Hoshina, he can’t fully believe it happened. He’s still half-convinced he imagined the entire thing.
Well, until now.
His palms are sweating when he presses the ‘call’ button and holds the phone up to his ear. A request to talk in person, that’s all he needs to form on his tongue. He can do that and gain some time to think through what to say. A frown appears on his face when he immediately hears the sound of a ringtone down the hall.
He rounds the corner just as Hoshina picks up, and freezes in the middle of the corridor.
“Hey,” Hoshina says into the receiver, as if he’s not leaning on the wall right next to the door to Gen’s quarters. As if he's not right there, in person.
Gen once again finds himself at a loss for words, slowly ending the call and pocketing his phone. The two of them have always had a script, every interaction predictable and biting, filled with rising tension. He’s not quite sure how to interact with the other man without baring his teeth, now that the tense thread has finally snapped.
He clears his throat, and tries to avoid eye-contact as he unlocks the door and steps inside.
He inhales, and glances over his shoulder, meeting Hoshina’s piercing gaze. “Are you coming in?” He asks, and leaves the door open as he walks inside and kicks his shoes off.
He hears Hoshina shuffle in after him, and hears the click of the door shutting behind them. The man doesn’t move further in though, hands in his pockets as he leans against the door, face unreadable.
Gen slumps down in his gaming chair, dragging weary hands over his face. Fuck it, he thinks. He can’t dig himself into a deeper hole than he already is. His troop members have already hounded him about the confession endlessly, because Gen had been stupid enough to ask Hoshina Soushirou out on an open comm-link.
“Did you kiss me, or did I dream that up?” His voice is surprisingly steady.
A part of him is expecting Hoshina to deny it, or to laugh it off. To say Gen’s gone mad. “I did,” the man says instead, like it’s easy for him to admit. Like it’s not a big deal.
Inhale. Exhale. Gen closes his eyes tightly and runs a hand through his hair as he looks for something to say. The other man beats him to it.
“I’ve always thought you hated me, y’kno?” Hoshina says matter-of-factly. When Gen glances at him, the man is watching him like a hawk, curiosity clear on his face.
“I still hate your guts,” Gen insists, but he can’t stop the defeat from creeping into his tone.
And as if Gen hasn’t spoken, the other man continues. It’s infuriating. “So, imagine my surprise when the Captain Narumi Gen suddenly asks me out in the field, and immediately passes out in my arms,” Hoshina says.
Gen bits his lip, and lets the statement hang in the air. He looks out the window, unable to look at the other man. He’s so preoccupied with trying to not focus on the other man that he misses the way Hoshina has taken off his combat boots and soundlessly pads across the floor.
Two hands land on the armrests of Gen’s chair, and he finds himself caged in. His startled eyes flick up and meet Hoshina’s calm gaze. There’s a soft expression on his face that Gen has never been at the receiving end of. One he has never even seen before.
“Never seen you at a loss for words, Captain,” Hoshina muses, and his low voice sends a shiver up Gen’s spine.
Something in him breaks, the last wall of defense crumbles.
Lightning fast, his hand shoots out to grab a fistful of the other man’s collar.
“Fine! I'll admit it, I lose,” Gen spits out, baring his teeth. “No matter how hard I try, I always lose to you. I try to get you by my side, I lose. I try to stay at the top, I lose my scores to you. I try to get you to acknowledge me, I lose. I try to get you out of my fucking mind, and once again, I fucking lose.”
Hoshina’s eyes grow wide at the outburst, but he stays in place. His mouth remains shut. It makes Gen’s blood boil. He lets go of the man’s collar and gives him a weak shove. Hoshina doesn’t move.
“You've had your fun, but you can stop playing with me now, Hoshina. I’ve never been your choice before, and I’m not delusional enough to believe that’d change. I never meant to bring it up, I was delirious, you can ignore it.”
And just as he thinks he can’t make the situation worse, his voice cracks at the end, and a stray tear falls. He hangs his head, letting his bangs shield him from the eyes boring into his very soul. He waits for Hoshina to laugh or leave, and bites his lip when the other man stands silently rooted in his spot.
So, he waits for the heartbreak.
Instead, a pair of hands find their way to his face. They run through his hair, pulling his bangs out of his face, and then cup his cheek with devastating tenderness. Hoshina gently angles his face back up, making their gazes meet. He catches another tear with a sweep of his thumb, and Gen is starting to question reality again.
“And what if I was intending to take you up on the offer?” Hoshina asks.
“Huh?” Gen blankly stares at the other man.
Hoshina smiles, and once again, it’s soft in a way that Gen is entirely unfamiliar with.
“Y’know, I’ve been desperate to prove myself worthy of being a soldier before I even joined the Defense Force,” Hoshina whispers. “I was flattered by your offer, but Mina had already gained my loyalty with a partnership to cover for each others’ weaknesses. Ya never needed an equal to stand beside you. Under your command I would’ve simply been one of many. Strong, but not an integral part of the unit.”
Gen opens his mouth to protest, but one look from Hoshina makes him close it just as quickly. He’s right, in the end. Gen had simply seen a strong soldier with potential, one to bolster his ranks. He had never needed someone to carve the way to victory for him, to complete him, the way Hoshina does for Ashiro Mina.
It had still hurt him, knowing that he hadn't been enough for Hoshina Soushirou.
“But bein’ considered a rival to ya, the strongest of them all? That was a thrill I couldn’t get enough of. I hadn’t realized that my need to measure up gave the impression that I don’t acknowledge ya. I kinda thought it was obvious, from the way I challenge ya.”
Gen inhales sharply at that, as realization slowly dawns. He thinks of their petty fights, and the way their gazes always meet in any room. He thinks of the lingering touches during their countless spars.
Hoshina pokes Gen on the nose, and earns a grimace and the start of an insult before he continues.
“‘Sides, I couldn’t just uproot all my aspirations for one pretty boy.”
Gen feels the insult shrivel up and die on his tongue as his throat suddenly feels dry. “You think I’m pretty?” He hates himself for being baited into asking, and hates the way his voice cracks. Most of all, he hates how much the other man’s opinion matters to him.
Hoshina smiles, amusement sparkling in his eyes as he slowly, pointedly, lets his eyes roam over Gen’s body.
And if Hoshina's hands on him makes him feel warm, being under the man’s appraising gaze makes Gen feel like he’s on fire. He’s certain that Hoshina doesn’t miss the way his ears are burning, and he hates that as well.
“Well, you’ve got all my attention now, Captain. I believe you had something to ask me?”
It takes Gen a moment to realize what Hoshina is asking of him. Then he’s suddenly reminded of what the Vice Captain had told him in the hospital, before kissing him like he mattered.
Fuck it, he thinks and clears his throat.
“Go on a date with me?” Gen asks, and once again hates himself for how meek his voice sounds.
“Sure,” Hoshina responds without hesitation, and grins before asking a question of his own. “Can I kiss you before that, though?”
Gen’s breath hitches at the ease of which Hoshina agrees. He’s not even allowed to recover before his eyes grow wide at the following question, and he finds himself nodding frantically before he has a chance to find his voice again.
He’s sure he looks like a fucking loser with how eager he is, but somehow, Hoshina’s eyes light up with delight and affection. Then suddenly Gen finds himself being yanked forward and kissed within an inch of his life.
Hoshina Soushirou kisses like he fights, with intention and pure passion, and Gen has never been one to let himself be beaten. His hands find the other man’s waist, and before he can even start pulling, Hoshina is seated in his lap like he belongs there.
Gen is pretty sure he’s about to vibrate out of his skin, and worries his heartbeat is loud enough to hear.
After an eternity, or perhaps just a short moment, they separate to catch their breaths. Soushirou rakes a hand through Gen’s hair, once again pushing his bangs out of his face to look him in the eyes.
“Hope ya don’t go ‘round kissing any sorry bastard you want to recruit like that,” the Vice Captain quips, and Gen feels his heart soar at the breathlessness in Soushirou’s voice.
“Just one,” he responds and quickly realizes he sounds more winded than the other man. Another loss, but for once, one he doesn’t mind. He pecks Soushirou on the lips just because he can, and whispers “Join the First Division,” against them.
Soushirou snorts and pushes him back into the chair. “No,” he says, and then immediately dives in to kiss a slow trail down Gen’s neck.
Gen sighs and whines under Soushirou’s ministrations, winding his arms around the other man as he tilts his head to give him access.
He feels bliss. At peace at last, in Hoshina Soushirou’s arms. So, it’s only natural that they’re interrupted at that moment. Neither of them hear the sound of a pin-code being entered, preoccupied with each other.
The door slams open, and Shinomiya Kikoru barges in with a: “Oi, idiot, get up! Your crush is at the base, time to-..”
She zeroes in on the two of them tangled up, and her rant trails off into a baffled silence as she watches the unfolding trainwreck her interruption causes.
As a startled Soushirou looks up, Gen flinches and moves his head.
Chin, meet nose.
Soushirou slides off his lap with a pained yelp and a flurry of expletives as he cups a hand over his nose to stop the sudden blood from dripping. At Soushirou’s quick movement, Gen gets yanked along from the weight shift, and quickly meets the ground with a grunt as the chair rolls away from under him.
They look at each other in shock, and slowly turn to Shinomiya in unison.
They’re all stuck in a silent stalemate for a moment, processing slowly. Shinomiya is once again the one to put an end to the peace, and promptly bursts out laughing like a hyena in the doorway.
The ridiculousness of the situation soon washes over Gen and Soushirou as well, and the duo fold like wet tissues as laughter overcomes them when their eyes meet once more. Gen doesn’t miss the way Soushirou winces through his laughter though, and quickly gets to his feet.
“Dude, I’m so sorry,” he winces as he pries Soushirou’s hand off of his nose to examine it. The other man lets him, but huffs in protest at his apology. “Don’t call me ‘dude’ when your tongue has just been down my throat.”
Gen winces again, and mutters another ‘sorry’ under his breath. “Doesn’t seem broken, at least,” he says and pulls Soushirou towards his private bathroom.
“Stay there, idiot-disciple. I’m not done with you,” he yells over his shoulder, earning what sounds like the mixture of a sob and laughter in response from the doorway, before turning his attention back to Soushirou.
He lets Soushirou do another quick examination of his nose in the mirror, and feels a rush of satisfaction when the man agrees with his diagnosis. He's surprised that Soushirou allows him to fuss, and tries to ignore the charmed sparkle in the other man’s eye and amused grin as Gen wipes blood off of his face with slightly shaky hands and apologies on his tongue.
“If anyone asks, we were sparring,” He suggests, face red in mortification.
“Sure,” Soushiro agrees, voice nasal from pinching his nose shut, but nods towards the trail of laughter from the other room. “Don’t know if she’ll agree with that, though,” he points out and sits himself down on the toilet lid.
Gen sighs, and promptly starts to whine. “I don’t want people to think I’m a loser.”
“Don’t worry, they already do,” Soushirou tells him without missing a beat, and flashes him a smile before shoving him back towards the main room to greet their surprise-guest.
Gen walks out with drooping shoulders, and is grateful for how quickly the interruption killed his boner. He would’ve had to off himself, if the option was death or speaking to his disciple slash little sister while sporting a tent in his pants.
“What do you fucking want?” He spits the moment Kikoru is in view.
She wipes her tears on her sleeve, and tries to compose herself with a wobbly smile. “Well, I was going to drag you to confess your undying love,” her voice is quivering as she glances towards the bathroom door. “But I guess you work faster than I give you credit for.”
“What I do with my love life is absolutely none of your business, moron” he stresses, squatting down by her side to poke her in the arm as emphasis for each word.
A cheshire cat grin spreads on her face instantly, and Gen realizes his mistake much too late.
“So, Vice Captain Hoshina is related to your love life?” Kikoru asks, triumphant in the face of a flustered Narumi Gen.
“Oh my god, shut up,” he hisses with wide eyes as he whips his head towards the bathroom door, before he looks back to Kikoru and grabs her shoulders insistently.
“Listen here, you little shit,” he grits his teeth. “Me and Hoshina were sparring, and I accidentally whacked him on the nose. You saw nothing here. Is that understood, Officer Shinomiya?”
Her lips wobble as she tries to keep her laughter at bay. Gen lets his eyes turn eerie pink for a moment, a kneejerk reaction that earns him a flash of blinding pain in his head and a blurring vision. At least it gets his point across. Kikoru nods reluctantly, giggling the entire way.
“You owe me so much for interrupting. I was about to get some,” he insists, shaking her shoulders slightly. He tries to ignore the cold sweat breaking out and the corners of his vision fading as Kikoru's laughter fades and her eyes grow concerned. Something must've shown on his face.
“Get some of what?” Soushirou’s voice interrupts, and Gen almost swallows his tongue. He whips his head around too fast, vision blurring and head spinning. Oh shit. He does manage to see Soushirou lean in the doorway, looking way too good for someone pinching his nose shut to stop it from bleeding.
“Actually, I gotta dip,” Gen declares, and promptly passes out.
“GEN!” Soushirou and Kikoru’s startled voices yell as the world goes dark. Again.