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Noelle doesn’t do parties. They’re too loud, too cramped, too much. She hadn’t even attempted going to one yet and she was already a senior in high school. She knew other people would see it as something sad, but it’s just the way she was. So, when she was in class on Friday and overheard someone mention a party that night, she didn’t even bat an eye. It was no question that she wouldn’t be invited and she wouldn’t be going anyway. She didn’t even mean to notice, but out of the corner of her eye she noticed that Kris was the one being invited to the party by Catti. They didn’t seem interested, she doubted they would even show up, but the fact that they might was enough to get her mind racing.
“Um– hey, Catti!” Noelle lightly jogged to catch up with her as she was leaving class. Catti’s gaze lifted from her phone to eye her suspiciously. “I overheard that you were having a party tonight and, uh– well, I was just wondering if I could maybe.. go?” She asked Catti nervously, wringing her hands.
Catti shrugged, “Yeah, sure. I’ve just never seen you show up to one. Figured it’d be pointless to invite you.”
Noelle tried not to be offended by that, she had a point after all, and instead beamed as Catti texted her the details and thanked her profusely before walking away to her locker. She knew she shouldn’t be as excited as she was, but she couldn’t get the thought of potentially seeing Kris out of her head. She missed them. She missed the closeness that they shared and the scent of their apple shampoo and having someone she knew she could always turn to. She caught a glimpse of their green sweater and shaggy brown hair as they left the school and she silently watched them leave. She had tried so hard to maintain their bond, but they had always managed to slip through her fingers. She often wondered if there was a part of them that felt the same way she did, the yearning to have their past made into the present again, but she brushed it off; there was no chance Kris had spent the same amount of time thinking about her as she did them. She held onto whatever faith she had that seeing them at the party that night could fix everything.
–
She sat in her room shortly before the party started, spiraling about what to wear. She had to be conspicuous, since she had told her mom that she was going to be studying with Berdly that night, but she still wanted to look at least a little good. She settled on a skirt that was a bit shorter than what she typically wore and a tight-fitted shirt that she could hide underneath a sweater before she left. She applied a small amount of makeup after getting dressed, nothing too much, but just enough to be noticeable.
The thought of seeing Kris still ran rampant through her mind, giving her butterflies for some reason. She couldn’t understand why. She wasn’t usually nervous to see them, but something about tonight felt different. She imagined seeing them at Catti’s party, red eyes illuminated in the low-lighting, their hair brushing over their face. Honestly, she had always thought they were so pretty. Or, handsome? Either descriptor could work for them in her eyes. They had always been self-conscious of their human appearance when they were younger, but she couldn’t understand why. Their beauty was so effortless, and they couldn’t even see it.
Her nerves skyrocketed as she made her way downstairs and said goodbye to her mom, praying to the Angel that she wouldn’t be questioned for her appearance. Her mom gave her a look, but said nothing more than a curt goodbye and a reminder to be home by curfew as she walked out the door. The evening air felt good against her fur, cooling the nervous heat that had built up on her skin. She took the baggy sweater that she had worn over her outfit off as soon as she left, setting it beside the gate for her to retrieve before she came home later. She knew no one else would be coming or going from her house that night, so it was a safe enough solution. She anxiously ran her hands over her arms as she approached Catti’s house. She wasn’t perfectly on time, so she was far from the first person to show up. She knocked on the door and was greeted by Catti, who somehow still seemed bored at her own party.
“Hey. You actually showed up.” Catti said, looking her up and down before stepping aside to let her in. “Nice outfit. There’s food and drinks on the table over there,” she said, gesturing vaguely in the direction of the kitchen, “Have fun.”
“Um, t-thanks, Catti!” Noelle awkwardly called after Catti as she walked back into the house, all attention going back to her flip phone. She looked around at the party, surveying who was there. She wasn’t close with anyone she saw; she recognized everyone from school, but didn’t know them beyond that. Snowy and MK were chatting on the couch in the living room, and Temmie looked to be talking Jockington’s ear off about something incomprehensible. There was no sign of Kris.
She dejectedly walked over to the refreshments table and poured herself a drink into a Solo cup, praying that it wasn’t alcohol. Judging by the taste of the first sip, it wasn’t. She made her way into the living room, where Catti had set up colorful lights and a disco ball to light the dark room. Settling into the corner by herself, all she could do was people watch, which was something she did enough of the time anyway. She noticed everything; the way that the couples she saw would whisper into each other’s ears, giggling at nothing and everything. The way that they casually held each other, a hand at the small of one’s back, pinkies intertwining, small kisses on cheeks. It made her chest ache.
Across the room, a familiar sight of unruly brown hair caught her eye. Her gaze immediately flicked over to them. They had actually shown up. She couldn’t help but stare. They were wearing an outfit she had never seen them in, a tight, black long sleeve and baggy, dark jeans. It wasn’t much, but it somehow managed to make her face flush. She caught a glance of their face and saw that they were wearing makeup too. The lights made them look like they were practically glowing from her point of view. They quietly laughed at something Susie said to them. Gosh, they were beautiful.
She tore her gaze away from them before they could notice her and chose to stare into her cup instead. What now? She had only shown up for them, and now that they were here she had no idea what to do with herself. She simply watched as Kris and Susie settled against the wall opposite her, the expanse of the room suddenly feeling miles long. She saw them lean in close to each other so they could hear what the other was saying, and it made her stomach drop. She suddenly felt pathetic, not even knowing why she bothered showing up in the first place. Her and Kris weren’t close anymore and it was absurd that she had even thought that she could get back what she had once lost. She stood up straight once more and started for the door, sparing one glance back at Kris and Susie to find Kris staring straight at her. Susie was still murmuring something to Kris in their ear, but they didn’t seem to be listening anymore, attention fully focused on Noelle.
She locked eyes with them, completely catching her off guard. She flinched, and it made them lightly giggle. She could’ve melted. They raised their hand and gave her a small wave, which she quickly returned. She continued walking toward the door, feeling more awkward than she had in her entire life. She figured she would be better off calling it a night now before her mom started to get suspicious. She reached for the doorknob and felt a familiar hand on her wrist. She turned, meeting Kris’ gaze for the second time that night. They gave her a small smile and nodded their head in the direction of the stairs, guiding her in the direction of them soon after.
Her mind was racing a mile a minute, heart beating out of her chest. She didn’t even fully know why she was following them, or where they were taking her, but her hooves led her forward anyway. They opened a random door with an amount of confidence that left her confused. She had no idea how they knew this door would lead into what looked like a guest bedroom, but she decided not to question it. Once they were inside, they shut the door behind them and turned to face her.
“I thought you didn’t like parties.” They said as more of a statement than a question, their tone teasing.
“Faha, yeah, I guess so,” she laughed awkwardly, sitting down on the bed in the center of the room, “I figured it was.. time to try something new.” She told them, knowing full well it was a lie. They took a seat next to her, closer than she was expecting.
“So.. were you having fun?” They asked her genuinely, turning to look her in the eyes. She was always stunned by their crimson gaze.
“U-um, well–,” she trailed off, trying to say something that would make her experience thus far sound less humiliating than it was, “I don’t know, the lights were.. pretty?” Was all she could manage. Kris chuckled beside her.
“I figured,” they told her with a knowing look, “I don’t really like parties either, I was just here with Susie.”
“Right..” Noelle muttered quietly, almost to herself, but she knew Kris would hear her. She dropped her gaze to the ground and anxiously fidgeted with her hands on her lap. “S-so, why did you stop me when I was leaving? And.. why are we here?” She asked them with a nervous laugh.
“I don’t know,” they shrugged, “I guess I just missed you.”
Noelle’s eyes went wide and she felt her cheeks begin to flush. “R-really?” She asked them in complete disbelief, turning to look at them once more.
“Yeah, I mean, we were so close, Elly. But I know you already know that.” They said, suddenly dropping their eyes to the floor as she had. Noelle gasped slightly at the nickname they used for her so casually, no one had called her that in years.
“Yeah, I.. I’ve missed you too, Krismas.” Noelle said with a small smirk, the nickname she used getting them to quickly turn back to looking at her with a slight flush on their cheeks.
“Oh god, not my full government name, that one should be off limits.” They said with mock offense on their face, giggling nonetheless.
“Oh, come on, Krismas! It’s such a beautiful name!” She said through giggles, “Why are you so ashamed of it?” She teased, getting a laugh out of them that she hadn’t heard in years. Their soft laughter eventually died down, leaving them smiling at each other in a comfortable silence. The comfort that Noelle felt around Kris somehow hadn’t gone away, despite all the time they had spent apart.
“I missed this.” Noelle said quietly, “Sometimes it feels.. like you’re the only person who actually knows me. I don’t have to be the perfect girl that everyone else sees around you, you know?” Kris just stared at her for a beat, their gaze falling somewhere else before landing back on her eyes.
“Me too.” They breathed. They had grown so close without Noelle even realizing. She could see the light dusting of freckles on their cheeks and the permanent intensity of their bright red eyes. The closer she looked, the more apparent the flush on their cheeks became. Before she could overthink and back away, she felt their lips brush hers.
She froze up at first, but was quick to melt into them. She breathed them in, their apple shampoo that she had missed so painfully, the softness of their skin, their lips. She brought her hand up to their jaw, slowly running her thumb against their cheek. The kiss ended as quickly as it began, both of them breaking apart with nervous breaths. Noelle looked into their eyes and smiled, her heart feeling like it could burst, and leaned back in. Their hand found purchase in her hair this time, combing through it gently. Butterflies exploded in her stomach, and she sighed into the kiss. This time it was deeper, she was more prepared now. She slung her arms over their shoulders, relishing in how perfect it all felt. She had briefly dreamed of Kris being her first kiss when they were younger, something about the idea had just felt right, but she had never thought it would actually happen. Now that it was, she couldn’t be happier.
They broke apart once more, foreheads touching, simply enjoying the closeness of it all.
“I’ve wanted to do that for so long.” Kris whispered, breaking the silence. Noelle flushed all over again.
“Wh– really?” she asked in quiet disbelief.
“Yeah, since we were little.” They told her with a little laugh, “I’m surprised you never caught on to it.”
“I just–” She stuttered, “I didn’t.. realize you felt that way.” She told them in a small voice.
“It’s okay, Elly. Don’t stress out about it.” They teased her, lightly flicking the side of her head, making her swat their hand away and laugh.
“Stop that!” She scolded them mockingly, “What am I gonna do with you?”
“Love and cherish me for the rest of your life.” Kris told her in a deadpan, serious voice.
“I’m sure I will, Krismas.” She told them, giggling and pressing a kiss to their cheek. “C’mon, let’s get out of here.” She said, taking their hand and pulling them to the door, back into the lights and music, and eventually into the cool night air.