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The smell of the hospital, the screams of children in the corridor, happy faces, many different voices around and flowers. This is how one of little Kimi’s first days could be described. In a ward full of people, tired George was lying next to him on a hospital bed.
Kimi was sleeping sweetly after all the examinations and procedures after his birth, while George was still weak and somewhat exhausted, occasionally looking at the cot next to him. Feeling a light touch on his arm, he looked at the man next to him. Max was smiling happily and gently at him. His eyes and cheeks slightly reddened, George never imagined that he would see his husband crying as he finally held his son for the first time, with a tender and proud look in his eyes. He never got tired of telling George how wonderful he was and how brave he was from the moment the labour started. But in reality, he was just constantly by his side, and that was the most important thing. He was very happy now, and Max must have felt it too. Finally, they were all together.
Finally, after three days, they were discharged. Little Kimi and George were completely healthy, so fortunately George could leave these walls. Putting on his usual linen shirt and matching trousers, he and Max, with the baby in their arms, headed for the exit.
Of course, friends and relatives met them at the entrance with congratulations. Shouts and applause, although George asked not to shout so loudly, flowers and gifts again. Everyone wanted to see the baby as soon as possible. A curious crowd gathered around Max as he happily and carefully held Kimi and showed the baby’s sleeping face.
Alex and George’s mother hugged him and praised him almost to tears. Charles and Ricardo stood next to Max, joking about the number of uncles Kimi had, and Carlos stood next to him, holding one-year-old Ollie. Oscar was also looking at the baby, but with a camera in hand, capturing every happy moment of the new little family.
Finally, a photo of everyone together. Everyone piled on Max and laughed, congratulating the new parents, Alex and Lando held George. Oscar is standing next to all this mess and with Kimi in his arms, of course, it’s not the first time he’s held a baby, but still nervous.
Then a family photo comes up. Kimi is already in George’s arms, Max is standing next to him, holding his waist, and his parents and Max’s mother are standing next to them. Everyone is happy, together in this small but very warm moment.
Well. George would be lying if he said that being a father of a child was easy. In fact, it was very hard, but he wasn’t alone. Max was always there to help. He didn’t let George lift anything heavy or carry Kimi for long periods of time. He would feed the child at night or cradle him until he fell asleep in his arms, which, by the way, is George’s favourite photo on his phone wallpaper. They went for walks together, a new photo appeared in the gallery every day, and from time to time George would read a book about healthy parenting and child rearing. Sometimes friends or relatives would come over, and they could leave Kimi with someone and go for a walk with Max. It was wonderful. It was a really magical and happy time for them. He really wanted to believe that it would never end, that they would always be together.
✦✦✦
It seemed that happiness would last forever. That’s what he used to think. Until everything changed, until they started fighting too often, too loudly, when they couldn’t stand each other, when it became too hard to be around each other. Everything changed probably a year or a year and a half ago, or even more. When Max moved away from them. When the once little Kimi had grown into a thirteen-year-old boy. He grew up fast, even too fast, and sometimes it was even scary.
But even so, he knew what was happening between his parents, although he tried not to show it, it was unfortunately hard not to notice this look in his own child’s eyes. George hated it. Sure, they were trying for him, but he wasn’t sure it was making things better. They flared up around each other and it was too much for them to bear. It was painful to think about how Kimi might have felt between them.
But still, from time to time, Max would come to get Kimi. They would go for walks, sometimes he would pick him up after school if his schedule allowed. He and Max would sometimes greet each other, on good days it might be a few words and then Max would go back to his other home.
Kimi would tell him where they had been and what they had done, and George could only smile softly as he listened to his son talk so excitedly about his day. He also tried to take Kimi out for walks, although his work was always an obstacle, he tried. But what broke his heart more was their… resemblance.
Kimi was definitely his father’s son. He and Max had heard a lot about how Kimi took George’s face and Max’s behaviour and habits. George couldn’t help but agree. Of course, he had noticed this since Kimi was very young.
The way they both liked to sleep, George noticed almost immediately. Kimi was a sleeper, just like his father. They often slept together, or if not together, for just as long. It turned into their little competition. In fact, they were very lucky that Kimi slept peacefully at night for the most part. But it didn’t end there. He kept falling asleep in different places, especially when he was very tired, in any position, no matter what time of day it was. Just like… Max. He didn’t hesitate to fall asleep anywhere: in a cafe, on the beach, in the car, while waiting for George while shopping, when he was drunk or when he was sober. Sometimes it was annoying, but mostly George just smiled, eventually taking a funny photo and covering him with a blanket.
Sometimes he was amazed by Kimi’s stamina, his ability to cope with stress for a barely ten-year-old was truly impressive. Of course, that childlike timidity hadn’t miraculously disappeared, but he was coping and coping well. He was as nervous as George, but he was as stubborn as both parents. The result and the effort.
What was also incredible was his memory and ability to absorb information. He had the nerdy, smart-alecky behaviour of a smart guy, just like Max. Both of them did not hesitate to show off their intelligence, insert a comment, or worse, correct and prove their point.
His stubbornness and persistence, especially in the things he loved, was remarkable. Although he wasn’t overly aggressive, he was serious about the things he loved. It was childish, but George knew where it came from, he knew who it came from.
It was hard to look at his own son and see his father’s habits everywhere. It was hard and painful, but what could he do about it? George was his father, just like Max. He supported him, helped him find a way out of difficult situations together, and loved to spoil this little brat just as much. It was impossible not to love your own little sunshine.
✦✦✦
It was another dreary, heavy autumn day. George was getting ready for work early in the morning as usual, while Kimi was bustling around in the kitchen, most likely preparing a quick breakfast for himself before school. The boy stood in front of the table, humming a song under his breath as he carefully spread the toast. Grabbing it, he ran to his dad in the living room, where he was fixing his clothes in front of the mirror.
— We have to leave soon, I’ll drop you off at school - George said as he tidied his hair.
Turning to his son, he gratefully took the offered toast, quickly glancing over at the child.
— That would be great - Kimi mumbled with his mouth full. What a kid.
On the way out of the house, George straightened his hair in the mirror one last time, then grabbed his briefcase and headed to the waiting son.
In the car, they remained quiet in the morning, neither of them quite awake yet, and both of them knew it.
In front of the school, George stopped the car, looking at his son as he hurried to get out of the car.
— Have a good day, sunshine - his father wished, smiling at Kimi.
— You too! - the always energetic Kimi.
— Love you!
— Love you too! - Kimi waved to his father as he walked back to the school, but eventually turned around and hurried in.
On his way to work, George stopped to get his morning coffee. At least something to wake him up.
At work, everything was as usual. Papers here and there, a bunch of new emails, a call from this and that. The usual office work, with the only pleasant thing being Alex at the next desk, who had absolutely no qualms about rubbing his ears all morning. He listened as he signed a document and nodded silently at yet another new story about cats from Alex’s house. A crazy man with thirteen cats in his house is really crazy.
Despite the fact that it was all boring, George still somewhat loved his job. His friend Alex was always with him, his boss was a nice man and the team was not bad, even good. And of course, he was able to provide for his child. He was calm and stable.
— Any news on Mr. Don’t-Remind-Me-Of-Him? - but sometimes Alex still managed to annoy him.
George glanced at Albon and exhaled. Leaning back, he looked at his friend tiredly, holding onto the table.
— Do you want to fight with me in the morning or…?
— Oh, come on George, you know what I mean - Alex rolled his eyes, leaning his feet on the table, almost sitting down.
— I thought about it, but it’s not like we talked about it…
— You haven’t lived together for almost two years, but you haven’t talked about divorce? Are you worried about money or something?
— Of course not, it’s just… hard. I’ll have to talk to him and the lawyer and also Kimi… I know what you’re saying, but I honestly don’t know, Al - George buried his face in his hands, rubbing it.
Alex looked at him, a little worried and just as tired. He understood what George was saying, but he could also see how difficult and painful this whole situation was for George. A divorce could finally break this last thread between them, free George, but Kimi…
Kimi is a sweetheart, everyone knew it and everyone was worried about the kid too. Going through your own parents’ divorce was the last experience anyone could wish for a teenager.
Alex just exhaled. Patting George on the back, he smiled and took the documents from his friend’s desk.
— Whatever happens, you remember I’m on your side, right?
George smiled back at him gratefully.
— I’ll take this to Lewis - Albon said as he left him.
Thanks to Alex, he had been thinking about it all day.
Of course, a formal divorce would make sense, he knew that, but how do you bring up the issue of divorce with someone you’ve known for so many years? With whom you share your own child? It was a difficult step for George, it was painful to think about their… situation, and now the divorce. And Kimi? What would he tell Kimi about it?
He wasn’t ready. Yes, it had been a year and a half, yes, they weren’t even living together anymore, yes, any other sane person would be in court signing papers by now, but something small, something really hurt in his heart when he thought about it.
— I’ll remind Alex about it later, that jerk… - George muttered angrily to himself as he looked at the computer screen and tried to push all unnecessary thoughts away so that he could continue working calmly.
✦✦✦
The working day went on as usual, boring and calm. Paperwork here and there, one or two calls that he successfully forwarded to Lewis at the end, letters and emails. Everything is as usual.
Lunch had already passed and everyone was back at work, although someone was still sipping coffee at their desk. George was in Lewis’s office listening intently to the new introductions and plans for the next week, some yawning and it seemed that even Lewis himself was not very impressed with what he was saying, but he was trying to keep his professional focus. When the small meeting was over, everyone finally exhaled, the older man plopped down in a chair at the table, George leaned tiredly on the same table, and Alex yawning went to get everyone coffee.
In the tired silence, George’s phone suddenly rang. Raising an eyebrow, George looked at the unknown number, but nevertheless picked up the phone, putting it to his ear.
— Hello, is this the number of George William Russell? - a woman’s voice said from the phone.
— Yes, it’s me - the man said carefully, standing up straight.
— Good, you’re on the phone from the London Hospital, on **** street - the continuation was no longer good - Please don’t worry about what I’m going to tell you next.
George froze at the words. He certainly didn’t like receiving a call from a hospital, especially with the address of a children’s hospital. The staff member’s reaction caught Lewis’s attention as well, and the door opened behind George with Alex and coffee in hand.
— I’m informing you that Andrea Kimi Russell has gotten into an accident. He is currently in hospital and we are trying to stabilise his condition. Can you confirm that you are his father?
This has knocked the ground out from under George. His heart skipped a beat and he was having trouble breathing. The horror on the older man’s face was noticed by Alex and Lewis. The older man immediately ran to him, while Alex put his coffee on the table and stood next to him, listening to what was being said on the phone.
— Kimi’s been in an accident? Is he in the hospital? - his voice almost broke.
— Please don’t worry, can you confirm that-
— Yes! Yes, it’s me, I’m the father - he tried not to stammer, but it was hard. It seemed like his legs were going to give out.
— Okay… At the moment we are trying to stabilise him, he is… not stable, but please don’t worry, we will be waiting for you-
He couldn’t hear what she was saying anymore. His head was quiet and only one thought was on repeat. Kimi. His Kimi, his child, was in an accident. Not in a stable condition. He’s in the hospital.
— Mr Russell? Are you there? - he heard the woman’s voice again.
— I-I’ll be right there!
He stared at the phone, unable to comprehend what had happened.
— George? Is Kimi in the hospital? What’s wrong? - Alex was next to him, looking as worried and concerned as he was.
— I-I don’t know, she called and… said Kimi was in the hospital, he-
Suddenly, someone put their hands on his shoulders, turning him round. It was Lewis. He looked serious, but also worried about the situation.
— George, pull yourself together. Pack your things and get to Kimi’s quickly, don’t worry about work, but you need to calm down first.
George stared at him, wide-eyed, only to notice how hard it was to breathe and how the phone was shaking in his hands. They took a few breaths in and out together and when he finally came round Alex put his arms around him.
— Be careful on the way.
George didn’t remember running out of the office building or getting into the car. He didn’t seem to wake up until he was on the road. Of course, the London roads didn’t make his situation any easier, and he had to wait at traffic lights, but he kept pushing the pedal to the metal, trying to get to the hospital as quickly as possible.
After parking the car, he ran out of the car. Once inside, he rushed to the registration desk to ask for his child. One of the nurses was in a hurry to take him to the surgery department. The doctors were all with Kimi, so he was not allowed inside.
George felt horrible. He was nauseous, his head felt like it was going to explode, and it was hard to breathe. The nurse told him to wait here, offering him a chair, but he refused, keeping his eyes on the door. He was asked to sign a couple of documents, so he tried to do so even though his hands were still shaking.
In the end, he was left alone. Alone under the door, where on the other side doctors were trying to save his boy. It was really horrible.
The more time passed, the more he waited. Every minute seemed like an eternity and it was torture for him. All he could do now was pray to all the gods, the doctors on the other side of the door and any other beings that his child would be saved and healthy. His hands were shaking and there was a lump in his throat. He really couldn’t do this, he couldn’t be here waiting for his child, not knowing what to expect next.
He thought about his Kimi, a small, tiny boy who loved cars and Italian food. The way he loved to argue with him or be clever just like his other father. His soft curls and dark eyes. They always joked about his dark eyes, while Max and he had light blue eyes.
He really couldn’t take it anymore.
Waiting in the silence of the hospital was even worse. He didn’t know how much time had passed or how long he had been waiting, but it was the most painful wait of his life.
Suddenly, he heard a door open down the corridor. George turned his head and saw him: his husband was there too.
Max came into the corridor, but as soon as he spotted George, he ran to him. He was all shaken up and out of breath, breathing heavily, and his cheeks were red. Oh, he was running here just like him. But he didn’t call him. Jesus, George hadn’t even called the father of his child.
— George, how’s Kimi? Any news? - Max immediately started with the questions, looking at George expectantly, but also worried.
He stared at Max, unable to believe that he was standing in front of him. The state George was in was so bad that he didn’t even think to call Max and tell him about Kimi. It was the last straw for him. His eyes hurt, and his throat felt like someone had tied him up with a rope.
— Max, I- The hospital called and she… she said Kimi was in an accident and I- I rushed over but- - he couldn’t speak clearly, his voice stuttered and barely came out.
Max stared at him, stunned, as he stammered and barely breathed in front of him.
George tried, but was interrupted. Without saying anything, Max suddenly put his arms around him, pressing his head against his shoulder. Even though they were different in height, he still pulled him close. It was a turning point. He couldn’t hold back any longer, feeling his face slowly getting wet. His back was shaking like the rest of his body, so he finally gave in. Grabbing onto Max’s clothes, he finally let his emotions out, sobbing into his husband’s shoulder. Max tried to calm him down by stroking his back or whispering to him, but he couldn’t calm down now.
All the emotions from the moment of that cursed phone call came crashing down on him in a new wave and now he could only cry. How could he not worry when he didn’t know what was wrong with his baby?
— I’m here, George, everything will be fine - Max kept reassuring him, not loosening his embrace for a second. He knew what to do, and it helped George a little, but at least a little. Max was with him. Finally he was with him.
✦✦✦
The wait continued to be just as unbearable, but at least he had Max with him now. They sat in front of the door on chairs, waiting for the doctors together. Max was holding his hand, guiding him with his thumb the whole time, while his head was on Max’s shoulder. His eyes and cheeks hurt from the amount of tears he had shed, but he didn’t say anything to him for it. They waited together.
And finally it came. The door opened and a couple of doctors came out. One of them took off his mask and said something to the other and left. Theparents immediately got up and approached the doctor.
— How is Kimi? - Max was the first to speak.
— I assume you are his parents - the doctor said, taking off his medical gloves - Kimi is fine, even great. He has a slight concussion and a broken right arm, but his condition is finally stable. He was barely breathing when he arrived at the hospital, so we had to work on the boy, but I assure you, - the doctor looked at both of them and smiled, - he’s fine.
George thought his legs were going to give out and he was going to fall, but Max held his hand tightly, not letting go, even though his shoulders loosened with relief.
They both finally exhaled, though their hearts were still pounding. Kimi was fine, and that was the main thing.
They were allowed into Kimi’s room. He was sleeping soundly with his arm already in a plaster cast and a drip by his side. George went to him immediately, looking at his boy. He felt like crying again, he didn’t know why, maybe because he was happy that his child was finally okay.
Removing the curls from his closed eyes, he barely touched his cheek, feeling the same warmth as always. Exhaling, he squatted down in front of the bed, holding his hand.
Max stood behind him with his arm around his shoulder. Leaning over, the man kissed his son’s hair and eventually leaned over to George as well, kissing the top of his head softly as well. It was a relief for all of them.
— I told you, it’s Kimi, - Max said quietly, - Our strongest guy.
Hiding his face in the crook of his arm, George smiled slightly. Standing up, he let go of Kimi’s hand and looked at Max. His eyes were still red and puffy, but looking back, Max just smiled softly at him.
— I’m sorry – he said quietly, looking at George.
George could only stare back at him for a long, silent moment. Standing next to Max, he smiled tiredly, resting his head on his shoulder again, feeling the other man’s arm wrap around his waist.
They didn’t say anything else to each other, and it seemed as if they didn’t need to.