Chapter Text
“You actually got it.”
Wemmbu nodded, equally stunned. “Bro, I did not think that was going to work.”
He hadn’t tested if the fishing hook could still grab things from a distance. Good thing it did, if not the papers in his hand would be nothing more than glorified ash.
That was when they noticed a line of fire creeping up the papers and Wemmbu almost dropped the blueprints in a panic.
“Bucket, BUCKET!” Wemmbu waved the pages around which only made the fire spread faster.
“I gotchu, bro.” The instant Egg pulled out his water bucket, Wemmbu dunked the entire thing in and smothered out the fire with a hiss.
A solid half was roasted off and the water definitely messed up some of the ink. Wemmbu cringed at the mess that had become of the yellowed papers.
He frustratedly slid it into his inventory and looked back down the ledge of the rooftop.
On the other end of the gaping pit that surrounded the Tower of Law, lined up atop the courthouse on the other side, was a colourful cast of…teenagers?
Most of them looked human, albeit with funky hair colours(not that he was one to talk), one in particular caught his eye; they looked like a physical incarnation of Bigfoot but with a cute hat.
Standing on the balcony below and looking up at them were a bunch of guys in suits with equally weird features. One guy was the physical embodiment of a beanbag, zipper for a mouth and all.
“I think that one is Franky.” Egg pointed down at a man with a blue pompadour and a beach shirt who was glaring at them like they personally destroyed his life.
“…are we interrupting something?” Wemmbu asked, frowning back.
“Probably. They look like they’re about to start sliming each other out.” And as much as he would like to stay to watch the CIA duke it out against teens and Bigfoot, they had more pressing matters.
His senses screamed at him just as the wind halted. Wemmbu flinched away from the ledge as a literal blade of wind shot up like a geyser where his face was moments ago.
A wedge was gouged out of the side of the building, like someone took a knife and sliced into the concrete like it was butter.
“We should go.” Wemmbu backed up from the ledge, sucking in a wary breath.
“Bro, what the hell was that?” Eggchan donned his elytra.
“Not staying to know.” He shot off into the air.
His eyes left Egg for a single second, when he looked back down he saw a couple agents on the rooftop going right for Egg.
Wemmbu dove back down to the ground, eyes locked on whoever was closest to Egg—some guy in a top hat—and raised his arm back with Gambit in hand.
It slammed down and he felt the impact travel up his arms except the distinct crunch of flesh was missing, in its place was a single hand that stopped Gambit in its tracks.
Top Hat calmly looked back at him, unimpressed.
“Let go!” Wemmbu tried to pull the mace back.
Top Hat’s fingers tensed and every nerve in his body screamed at him to run the fuck away.
He swapped out his mace for his sword, retreating back a couple steps, he had a second to catch his breath before he caught something out the corner of his eye.
Top Hat somehow got behind him and jabbed his finger at him. Wemmbu almost laughed at the sheer ridiculity of the gesture until his instincts screamed at him to move again.
His sword blocked the damn finger and the Netherite screeched. Wemmbu ducked to the side just as another fucking finger shot at him.
It blasted through the space just next to his eye and gouged out a solid chunk of his mask. Pain exploded as his ear was entirely pierced through and tinnitus swarmed his head.
Nope. Nope. Nope.
Wemmbu flung an ender pearl to the other end of the rooftop, hastily biting down on an enchanted golden apple and scanning the suddenly crowded space for Egg.
“Bro, what even are you?” Egg screamed as he ran around and fired a firework at the beanbag-looking guy who was as large as a wall.
“Why are you still down here? ” Wemmbu shouted.
Egg soared up into the air, kicking up ashes and gunpowder in his wake.
As his ear stitched itself back together, he felt another shift in the wind and leapt off the ground just as another slash of wind gouged out another chunk of concrete under his feet.
The entire corner of the rooftop was torn off like paper, comically sliding off the top like an iceberg.
Shadow covered the sun and Wemmbu ender-pearled away as Top Hat landed from the sky and crushed the ground he just stood at.
“Hand over the blueprints.” Another guy with a horizontally rectangular nose and a black cap said. Fuck it, they were multiplying.
“Not a chance, buddy.” Wemmbu replied, tossing an ender pearl and windcharge into the air.
The instant he teleported midair, two agents on either side of him did too.
Wemmbu shot high into the air alongside Egg, the clamminess of his hands suddenly making itself very known. He wasn’t scared, he was fucking confused.
“Holy shit…” Wemmbu looked downwards and sucked in a sharp breath.
Because the government agents were somehow stepping on air.
Correction: they were running really really damn fast towards them in the air.
He knew this world wasn’t just filled with chungies. There were people who could swim through the ocean at breakneck speeds, freeze them whole without moving a single finger, and apparently government agents who could gouge chunks out of concrete with air slashes and run on nothing.
The two agents—Beanbag and Cappy—split up, one for Egg and one for him.
Wemmbu flew towards Cappy and gripped Gambit tighter.
Just as one of those pulverising kicks swung at him, Wemmbu spun his body mid air and their shoe narrowly missed his tiara. He threw an ender pearl towards Cappy’s torso and as he reappeared he thrusted the sword into Cappy’s chest.
It was like striking against obsidian, Wemmbu practically bounced off from the unexpected resistance.
“What was that thing, that orb you threw?” Cappy asked.
“Dude, what is the government feeding you?” Wemmbu asked him and mentally added skin of fucking steel to his list of bullshit they could do. “Do you have armour infused into you or what?”
“You could say that.” Cappy shrugged.
A cross between a shout and a shriek came from somewhere higher above.
“Cool, good talk.” Wemmbu nodded and flew back up towards Egg who was being chased by Beanbag.
[go left] Wemmbu quickly told him.
Egg darted to the side so fast he unintentionally juked out Beanbag, who had to skid abruptly on his feet like some looney toon character.
Wemmbu sprang up behind him and slammed his mace over Beanbag’s head like they were a wack-a-mole target. The force made his nerves shiver up his arms, but it followed through and Beanbag was sent careening into the rooftop with a giant cloud of dust as his exit curtain.
“You good?” He turned to Egg.
Egg drew his bow and aimed it right for his head.
The arrow zipped past his ear and a pained grunt came from someone behind him.
Wemmbu turned back and saw Cappy with the arrow embedded deep in his shoulder.
He sharply spun the rest of him around and lifted Gambit above his head.
Cappy joined Beanbag in a similar crater on the rooftop. Whether Cappy’s head was harder than a brick wall or not, a mace to the head right into concrete would give anyone a concussion.
“Bro, how did you get a hit on that guy? My sword didn’t do jack on him.” Wemmbu took out his sword and turned it over and saw a tiny scratch on the once pristine blade.
“I hit him with one of the sea stone arrows Bob gave me.” Eggchan waved around the arrow.
“You mean Columbo.” Wemmbu enunciated that last word.
“Now’s not the time, bro.” Egg anxiously grabbed onto his arm and gestured at what he could only describe as an imminent disaster because fucking Top Hat was coming up to them.
“Gimme some. These guys definitely have devil fruits.” Wemmbu mumbled.
“They all have the same abilities, so it isn’t a devil fruit.” Egg told him as he handed over four of the seven arrows he had left.
“Last time I checked ordinary people don’t look like beanbags.”
Wemmbu locked eyes with Top Hat for a split second and a sudden chill ran down his arms.
“I’m not gonna lie, bro actually has those serial killer vibes.” Egg shuddered.
Both of them drew their bows, nocked a sea stone arrow and fired.
Top Hat effortlessly caught the arrows and snapped them in half.
“Any chance you have a gun?” Wemmbu winced.
“Should’ve gotten it from Bob when we had the chance.” Eggchan said. “Bro, you have the blueprints, right?”
“Uh, yeah.” Wemmbu checked through his inventory.
“Then why aren’t we going?” Eggchan asked, exasperated.
“Because Top Hat’s coming for us.” Wemmbu took out Gambit and spun it in his grip.
“So? We can go now.” Egg waved his firework rocket around in his hand. “Bro, we don’t need to fight them at all.”
“They could follow us back.” Wemmbu said.
“You’re the one who said they can’t follow us through the air, what are you talking about?” Eggchan snapped.
In the blink of an eye, Top Hat suddenly appeared behind Egg. There was a faint afterimage, as if Top Hat was moving fast enough to seem like he was teleporting.
Egg lifted his arm just as Top Hat made a chopping motion towards his neck.
The hand went sliced through the gap between Egg’s eyeball and his torso, but shattered the log pose coincidentally in its path.
Wemmbu shot another arrow towards Top Hat and of course the fucker dodged it. The thinnest line of red was drawn on Top Hat’s cheek but no blood was drawn.
“Ignore them! We have Nico Robin, return to the Tower of Law!” A snobbish voice shouted at them.
A vein bulged on Top Hat’s forehead and his face twisted into a scowl.
Eggchan grabbed onto his arm and dragged Wemmbu with him before he could say anything. One firework later, Enies Lobby was nothing more than a distant block of concrete over the ocean.
“Uhh, we can stop now.” Wemmbu shouted against the wind as Egg didn’t stop spamming rockets.
“Not until we can’t see the island bro, that was too close.” Egg rotated his eyeball back.
“I mean, it was kinda okay.” He’d been through worse.
“They have a beanbag and a serial killer—actually all of them are serial killers, they’re assassins!”
“Chill, bro.” Wemmbu patted his arm. “Are you gonna let me go anytime soon?”
Egg skidded to an abrupt stop mid-air and promptly let go. Wemmbu felt his stomach drop before falling down with it, angling his body into a gentle glide instead.
“Really?” He shouted back up.
Egg glided down next to him. “Deserved.”
“What did I do?”
“One who is unaware of his shortcomings will never realise the weight his actions have on others.” Egg said wisely.
Wemmbu cast him a confused look.
“I’m dropping a bar, bro.” Egg sighed.
“I didn’t say anything.” He held his hands up.
“But your eyes speak differently.”
“Okay, bro.” He just nodded.
“Yo, isn’t Robin Bob's granddaughter or something? Shouldn’t we help save her?” Egg turned back in the direction of Enies Lobby.
“Our job was to deliver the letter, not save her.” Wemmbu said. “Besides, I don’t know who those kids are but they seemed pretty damned determined to get her.”
One of the teenagers had a Straw Hat on their head so he put two and two together and figured that those were the Straw Hat pirates. Somehow an entire city managed to mistake a bunch of kids for assassins, what a joke.
“They looked like they had it handled.” He shrugged. In truth, he didn’t care if they were kids, but that they were pirates.
He despised pirates.
“Whatever you say, man.” Egg shrugged. “You have the blueprints?”
“Right here.” He took it out.
“Good, then let’s go back.” Egg said.
“Yeah.” He took out the eternal pose and held it out precariously.
“Gimme.” Egg took it from him.
“Hey—” Wemmbu was cut off by Egg shoving a hand in front of his face to shut him up.
“I’m leading us back, no questions asked.”
***
Three hours later, they could finally see Bob Island.
On the trunk of Bob’s tree was a pillar of pink blocks, magenta terracotta to be exact, from when Egg pillared up the side. Right above it was the hole they dug when they first arrived at the tree and as they flew closer, Wemmbu gestured towards it.
“I’ll make a platform.” He said, taking out the remaining blocks in his inventory.
Wemmbu dove under the massive tree’s canopy, taking out an ender pearl and flinging it towards the tiny space left for landing.
Normally he would just fly straight in, but Bob was unfortunately aware enough of the unwanted gaping hole in his office and patched it up with wooden boards.
Once he reappeared on the tiny space, he built out the platform big enough for an unskilled chungy to land on.
Egg came in for the landing and in the short instant where he reached his hands out to land right, Wemmbu put up two blocks and he collided into it face—well, eyeball—first.
“BRO—!” Egg screamed, betrayed as he comically spiralled down like a fly.
Wemmbu, knowing full well Egg could hear it, cackled loudly just for the fun of it before taking out a water bucket and tipping it over so Egg could swim up.
He could hear faint curses coming from down below and tuned them up with an obnoxiously smug grin.
On the other side of the wall, somehow still unaware of their presence, was Bob sitting at his desk with his back facing them with a pair of headphones on his head as he talked to some weird-looking snail.
“…thanks for alerting me, Koala.” Bob’s faint voice carried through the air. “Send who you can here. I’ll be fine, don’t worry.”
A force collided with his side and Wemmbu turned around to meet a very soggy, very mad Eggchan.
“Bro, that did nothing.” Wemmbu said.
“Darn it.” Egg pouted.
In a swift swing, Wemmbu tore down the wooden boards with his axe. “Yo, Bobby. We’re back.”
Bob turned his neck around so sharply his headset slid off his head.
He hastily shoved it back on. “Sorry to end our call short, I have something new to address.”
Bob took off his headset and looked at them. “You two sure had an interesting adventure.”
“We sure did, Columbo.” He crossed his arms.
“Just Bob is fine.” Bob replied instinctively before realising. “…what did you just call me.”
“Your full name is Cloudy Columbo, or something like that.” Egg said. “Iceberg told us, bro. Why did you hide it from us? That name is tuff as hell.”
“Should’ve known Iceberg couldn’t keep his damn mouth shut.” Bob grumbled, sliding a hand down his face.
“For the record, the government thinks I died along with the other scholars in Ohara and I’d like to keep it that way.” Bob reasoned. “Clou D. Columbo is dead as far as the government is concerned.”
“Why is the ‘D.’ separate from the front part?” Egg asked.
“It’s a middle name that was passed down from my father.” Bob said. “The initial belonged to descendants from the Clan of D. but its historical significance was lost over the years.”
“Cool, don’t care. Hold still for a moment.” Wemmbu cracked his knuckles.
Egg slowly backed away from the two of them.
Wemmbu swung his fist towards Bob’s face, the scholar ducked down just as it whistled over his hair.
He wrapped his leg around Bob’s own and pulled it back, or in Bob’s case, sent his foot sliding off the ground and shoved his entire body backwards onto the floor.
And he would have beat Bob’s head in, but Bob was a chungy and would die instantly if that happened, so he aimed for the next best option.
Right next to Bob’s head.
“Your mask idea was shit.” Wemmbu said, staring Bob down. “And don’t get me started on the name, still can’t believe your name isn’t Bob.”
“And it is still Bob.” Bob winced, side-eyeing the fist crater next to his head. “I haven’t been called anything else for the past thirty years.”
“I mean, it isn’t that deep, bro.” Eggchan said. “Like, it’s just his name.”
“It’s my mental stability.” Wemmbu said back.
“Your…what?” Bob looked up at him in confusion. “What does my name have to do with your mental state?”
“Your name isn’t Bob. That alone is enough to destroy anyone’s brain.” Wemmbu jabbed an accusing finger towards him. “You are the most ‘Bob’ looking ‘Bob’ I have ever seen, I’ve never been more betrayed.”
“You lowkey have tho.” Eggchan nonchalantly pointed out.
“Aren’t you overreacting?” Bob said. “It’s a name, nothing more.”
“Egg, back me up.”
“I ain’t backing you up on anything, dawg.”
Bob stood up, carefully rubbing the back of his head that would definitely bruise by next morning. “So, how was your little excursion? From what I read, it was quite…eventful.”
“I mean, it was fun.” Wemmbu started. “We rode a train, talked to some people, crushed some people with fish and…” He proudly pulled out the half-intact blueprints. “Got this.”
Bob stared at them like they were some wonder of the world.
“What the fuck.”
“I mean, they are in pretty bad shape but like, you’re a scholar, right? You know how to fix this stuff.” Wemmbu waved the blueprints around.
“How did you get that?” Bob stared.
“We just did.” Wemmbu said.
“You have one of the most destructive weapons in the world in your hands.” He stated. “You’re not meant to have that.”
“Well we do, like, what’s wrong?” Egg asked.
“Well, I obviously didn’t think you’d actually get it!” Bob gestured at it. “I thought Iceberg would put up a bigger resistance to giving it to you.”
“Iceberg didn’t give it to us.” Egg told him.
“So you got it from Franky.” Bob concluded.
“Well, ‘got it’ is kinda off. We stole it from him.” Wemmbu made a so-so motion with his hand.
“Stole? The blueprints shouldn’t be in a place where you could just steal them.”
“We took it from him in Enies Lobby where all the CP guys were.”
“Enies Lobby? Shouldn’t you be at Water 7? And what do CP agents have to do with this?”
“Okay so, funny story. The blueprints were with the Franky guy but the Franky guy got taken to the Lobby Place and when we went there he was about to burn them, so I fishing-rodded it up and then the CP guys all saw us and then started fighting us.” Wemmbu said.
Bob paused, looked at the sky like he was searching for a hope that this reality was fake, then looked back at them. “They saw you.”
“Yeah.”
“And you fought them.”
“Mhm.”
“And you used your abilities in front of them.”
“Yes.”
Bob stared at them in utter disbelief and wonder.
“Let me get this straight: you went to one of the main government establishments, showed off what I specifically told you to hide, and they saw you take Pluton’s blueprints.”
“Pretty much, yeah.”
Bob bit on his lip, sat down at his desk and rammed his head right into the table.
“Both of you. Are fucking idiots!” He shouted as he stood up. “Honestly, you could not have done this any worse, could you?”
“Does nothing I say get into that miserable piece of crap you have for a brain? This is the shittier than worst case scenario I imagined, and I have a darned good imagination. You managed to go through my rock-bottom expectations and reach the centre of the fucking planet!”
“It ain’t that deep, man.”
“So you stole Pluton. And not just discreetly, but right in front of their fucking face. And not only that, but you also revealed your abilities, the same thing they were willing to hunt Lakerek for all those years ago, at their front fucking door.”
“Do you understand the gravity of this?” Bob shouted. “Did you at least head back to St Poplar before coming back here?” Bob asked. “Or fly in a roundabout direction?”
Wemmbu and Egg shared a look. “Well about that.”
“Okay, so you two flew directly here in a straight line after aggravating the World Government Intelligence headquarters and didn’t bother to try and mask the route with a detour?”
“Chill Bobby, if no one could find your island for years, then they won’t find it now.”
“It’s a risk.” Bob said. “One you should have considered, or maybe you couldn’t consider it at all since you’re so short-sighted a blind person would win a fight against you.”
“Try a blindfolded person.” Eggchan said.
“Okay buddy.” Wemmbu rolled his eyes.
“Do you want to know the shit you’ve stirred up?” Bob asked, pointing at the weird snail on his desk. “Enies Lobby was destroyed by a Buster Call called onto the Straw Hats, but the remaining battleships and ones nearby are congregating at a nearby repair and restock base.”
“…battleships?”
“Yes. They’re positioned to head towards my island’s direction, because someone didn’t think to head in another way.” Bob said through gritted teeth together.
“To be fair, the logpose broke so we didn’t have anywhere else to go.” Wemmbu pointed out.
“Where did you hear all this battleship stuff from anyway?” Egg asked.
“Informats who benefit more from knowing the navy’s movements than I do. They were kind enough to alert me about this.” Bob combed a hand through his hand. “Oh god, they’re having—”
‘Puru puru puru.’ The snail-phone thing on Bob’s desk started making a weird noise.
“Holy ringtone, bro.”
“Sorry, I have to take this call.” Bob cleared his throat and walked over to some weird looking snail on his desk. “Don’t break anything.”
“Chill, Bobby. We’ll be fine.”
“And my tree won’t be. Eyeball, keep him from being an idiot.” Bob sat down and slid his headset on.
“Huh?” Eggchan’s eyeball blankly rolled up from a book Wemmbu didn’t even notice he picked up.
“Nevermind.” Bob turned away, his fingers rapping against the top of the desk nervously.
A female voice came from the other end, and as much as he tried, it was too muffled for Wemmbu to make out anything.
As she kept speaking, Bob’s eyes widened and he murmured a curse under his breath. “…it’s alright, calm down.” He said, voice low. “Just…give me a moment.”
The walls creaked and the lights flickered once.
Bob stood up from his chair. All the exasperation and recent crash out was drained from his face, replaced with a sharper, colder edge.
“What’s wrong?” Wemmbu frowned.
“Everything and nothing.” Bob sighed. “Both of you follow me. Kitchen.”
“…okay?” Wemmbu tapped Egg’s shoulder.
“Bro, what is it?” Eggchan didn’t look up from his book.
Wemmbu pried the book out of Egg’s hands and snapped it shut.
Egg stared at him like he had the fucking audacity to interrupt his reading, which he did. Wemmbu was going to throw the book, but opted for placing it down after the brutal memory of getting hit in the face by a book did its laps around his brain.
He dragged Egg behind him and pushed open the door to the kitchen, where there were more chairs than last time, two facing one.
A strong herbal scent came from the table and Bob had his back facing them while his hands moved around, preparing something on the table.
“So…you took us here to eat something?” Wemmbu asked.
“To drink something.” Bob corrected.
“Can we go back to the fact that the navy’s doing some attack stuff that might be heading to your island?” Wemmbu asked.
“My blood pressure is suffering because of you, so before I get a heart attack from anything else, I am taking this rest seriously.” Bob said.
On the table were a couple teapots and four cups: a normal wooden cup, two plain white ones, and one extremely fancy gold-patterned red cup.
“Sit.” Bob said.
He lifted the lid of one of the teapots and took out the teabag sticking out.
“Uh, what?” Wemmbu sat down. He picked up the fanciest cup and spun it around.
“Put that down.” Bob reacted immediately like a sprung trap, carefully taking it out of his hands and looking more panicked than when he received the weird news over the call.
“This one’s special. You’re using these other ones.” He gave it a thorough look over and placed it down like it was some sort of precious treasure.
“Then why did you bring it here?” Egg asked.
“Habit.” Bob said.
He raised the teapot with a practiced sort of grace that didn’t fit him, pouring some reddish-liquid into the three cups and pausing just before the fourth.
“This is a drink called Tea.” Bob nudged the two plain cups towards them. “Try it.”
“I’m not trusting a drink named after a letter.” Wemmbu frowned suspiciously at the cup.
“It’s not bad.” Egg nodded as he daintily held up the plate and picked up the teacup with his pinkie raised.
“Okay seriously, how are you drinking?” Wemmbu asked.
“What do you mean ‘how’? I just am.” Egg said.
“There’s quite a story on how tea spread around. Apparently most of it used to be restricted to a single island, but then an adventurer called Noland discovered it and reported it to his King. The Lvneel King tried to hide it from the rest of the world but one loudmouth spoke and you know how the rest goes.” Bob said, taking a sip for himself.
“Do they just casually find a pond of this stuff?” Wemmbu asked, lifting the cup just slightly higher.
“Well, no.” Bob said. “To translate it into your crude terms, I believe it is called ‘leaf water’.”
“Leaf water.” Wemmbu repeated. “Nahhhhh bro.”
“Brother, you’ve eaten rotten flesh before, you cannot be chickening out about this.” Egg gently nudged his arm.
“You’ve eaten what.” Bob turned his head over to Wemmbu, expecting elaboration.
Which, of course, he wasn’t gonna get.
“Fine.” Wemmbu scoffed, grabbing the cup from the opposite side of the handle.
He chugged the entire thing in one gulp and nearly choked on it because holy shit it was the more herbal shit he had tasted and possibly the smokiest too.
“Dude, it’s like temu coffee.” Wemmbu coughed into his fist.
“I don’t know what ‘temu’ means but don’t disrespect my tea like that.” Bob grumbled.
“You could say it was not his cup of tea.” Egg said.
It took Wemmbu a hot second for the pun to register. “Okay buddy, shut up.”
“Intended or not, don’t do that again.” Bob said calmly, taking another sip.
“What he said.” Wemmbu snapped a finger in the scholar’s direction.
“I thought it was funny.” Egg mumbled as he placed his cup down. “Uh, mind continuing the tea history lesson?”
“Well, after the government found out, the celestial dragons decided to pursue it.” Bob’s eye twitched at the mention of the dragon people. “The island was plundered of tea leaves before being razed to the ground after some sort of miscommunication.”
Well that escalated quickly.
“Noland was a botanist and saved the tea population with the few stalks he saved for his studies. He cultivated many variants of tea and spread them along his travels. The variants evolved over the years and now there are many kinds of tea thanks to him.” Bob said.
“Do you know this Noland guy?” Egg asked.
“Of course not, he died 400 years ago. I’m old, but not that old.” Bob said. “He died in disgrace too, executed and someone made a picture book out of it. You can find it somewhere in here.”
“Yeah, ‘Noland the Adventurer’. It was in your library.” Egg said.
“That’s the version I wrote.” Bob said. “The government edition is called ‘Noland the Liar’, a cautionary tale for kids not to lie.”
“So he never went to Dressrosa and befriended the fairies or went to the City of gold?”
“City of gold?” Wemmbu perked up.
“Of course he did.” Bob scoffed. “He was practically worshipped in those places, the locals still tell many stories of them.”
“Hang on, you’ve seen fairies?” Wemmbu asked sceptically.
“Yes. I’m old friends with a few of the people in Dressrosa, but it’s been years since I last saw them. They’re probably fine.” Bob shrugged.
Wemmbu blinked and found it a lot harder to keep his eyes open. He swore it was the weird leaf water doing this because he was never exhausted after battles or flying.
“Bro, I’m getting sleepy.” Egg said.
“Dude, I thought you liked the leaf water.”
“Liking tea and feeling drowsy have no relation to each other.”
“Usually tea has the opposite effect, like coffee, since it has caffeine.” Bob placed his cup down. “But some people find that it relaxes them, so who am I to judge?”
Wemmbu noticed tiny bits of undissolved white powder at the bottom of the cup, barely noticeable amidst the porcelain.
His heart jumped into his throat, but even with the rush of adrenaline his head grew heavy.
Egg slumped in his seat, eyeball pupil fuzzing hazy.
“Bro, you alright?” Wemmbu asked him, throat parching.
“Just need a nap, be right back…” Egg lifted a peace-sign before his eyeball blanked white in sleep.
Bob stood up and cleared the plates and cups, staying oddly silent.
A muted fuzz spread through his fingers and he massaged them, only succeeding in making them more numb. It was like someone splashed a crazy strong weakness potion on them.
He sluggishly stood up, tipping his chair over in the rush.
“…what did you do?” Wemmbu glared over at Bob, who serenely placed the dishes in the sink.
Bob let out a small sigh. “I suppose the concept of spiking a drink is quite foreign to you.”
Spiking? “What the fuck did you do to us?”
“I didn’t mean to do this, truly, but both of you need to stay out of my way, for your good and mine.” Bob said, walking over to him.
He pried his eyelids open after another blink. His heart beat slower and tinnitus flooded his ears, every motion made the floor tilt.
“Don’t touch me.” Wemmbu drew his sword, but it fumbled out of his hands like a toddler handling a toy.
A hand sharply chopped the back of his neck.
Motherfucking son of a—