Chapter Text
Pawbert’s life in prison was the same every day, like a broken record that keeps playing the same song.
Here, everything felt slower and meaningless. Pawbert would occasionally think about his life he had with Gary, the snake that he used and betrayed all for his family. Pawbert realized that his time with Gary was much better than being in prison. However, the fact that he tried to hurt Gary, Judy, and Nick were irreversible.
Pawbert still couldn’t forget the look Gary gave him when he cruelly threw him out on a cold snow. Every night he’d have a nightmare about that day, it was like a some kind of punishment.
The nightmare was the same. He'd open his eyes in the control room and he see Gary buried under the snow. Then, he’d lunge toward him, squeezing him very tightly, asking if he was finally satisfied, and open his mouth and try to swallow him.
“I’m sorry! I’m sorry!” Pawbert would scream, but it was useless. Then, he would wake up with tears and sweats all over his body.
Tonight was the same, he dreamed about the same place and Gary wrapped him and this time, he tried to bite his neck.
“NO!” Pawbert woke up screaming. That felt too real.
He heard a grumbling sound from his side.
“Could you please shut it, Pawbert?” His father, Milton, spoke in a low, quiet voice. He was clearly annoyed that Pawbert interrupted his sleep.
“Oh… I’m sorry dad, haha.” Pawbert giggled nervously hoping it’d make his father less angry, but there was no response. Pawbert sighed.
Even before coming to the prison, he knew that some of his father’s plans were bad; too self—centered and disrespectful, but he had to follow them without questioning because he wanted to feel accepted, to become a real Lynxley. However, being in prison made Pawbert realize how brutal his father could be.
Almost every day, Milton and Pawbert’s siblings, Cattrick and Kitty, would argue, and sometimes it gets too intense that guards have to get involved to stop him.
Whenever the argument starts, Pawbert would crawl up in the corner, covering his ears and his eyes shut.
Milton showed his violent side even before in prison; he'd throw his paws at Pawbert whenever he did something that he didn’t like. Pawbert just believed that he simply wasn’t good enough. But seeing his father unchanged, Pawbert started to wonder if it is really worth it trying to impress him after all.
After looking at his father, Pawbert tried his best to go back to sleep, but he couldn't. The rest of the night was silent.
When Pawbert opened his eyes, a thin ray of sunlight was coming through the small barred window of the cell, telling him it’s almost 9 a.m.
He stood up and felt the sunlight. The small light shined on Pawbert's fragile body.
“This marks 35 days in this place.” He counted in his head.
“Now you, what are you doing standing there like a dummy?” His father asked with annoyance in his voice.
“N… nothing dad... How was your night?” Pawbert asked carefully, fearing if he's still mad about him.
Milton just shook his head and ignored him. Next to him, he could feel that Kitty and Cattrick were rolling their eyes. Pawbert’s ears went down. "You never belonged in this family, you'll never." Milton's voice echoed in Pawbert's head.
He missed his life with Gary the most at times like this. With him, he felt free and safe, never feeling judged. He missed how Gary would casually wrap his body around him, giving him a hug. Pawbert didn’t say it, but he secretly liked it because in his life, no one ever hugged him like Gary. He never realized Gary’s hug was worth more than his family’s approval, but it was too late for him to realize that.
“Breakfast time, get out all of you.” The horse guard said indifferently.
Other guards came and opened the prison doors. His family went out first of course, and Pawbert was the last.
The food was disgusting, the same meals were served every day. Pawbert skipped most of the meals, but he had to force himself to eat just enough so he wouldn’t feel too tired all day.
After breakfast, all prisoners went outside for 30 minutes. Others would play sports or hang out, but Pawbert was never included. He sat in the corner of the wall by himself.
However, he loved this time because he felt the sunshine, and he could knit in peace. Knitting was Pawbert's hobby, but he had to do it secretly because of his family thought it was pathetic.
He found two sticks on the ground before, and even though the quality was bad, the sheep guard was nice enough to get him some yarn each few weeks. The yarn he received this week was light blue, Similar to the color of Gary.
“Gary…” Pawbert thought about that snake's smile. After knitting for about thirty minutes he made a small scarf, the shape resembled Gary. Pawbert put the scarf around his neck. It was soft and warm. It felt like Gary was hugging him once again.
Pawbert closed his eyes to take a break from his family, from his life, and from his world...
“Time's up! Get inside now!” Pawbert's break ended as the buffalo guard yelled at his face. Pawbert quickly looked around and realized that he was the only one remaining.
“Oh! I… I’m sorry!” He apologized.
He quickly got up and squished his scarf into his body. He didn’t want his family to find out. Later that day, Milton and Cattrick got into an argument again, and Pawbert just squeezed himself on the bed trying to stay out of it.
“How is it my fault? Can’t you just see it was all Pawbert?” Cattrick pointed his finger to Pawbert.
“W— What? Why am I involved?” Pawbert panicked.
“Because you are the one who made the Lynxley family fall!” Milton grabbed Pawbert by the collar of the shirt and scratched him with his claws.
“Ow!” Pawbert screeched in pain. A wolf guard rushed in.
“Prisoner 137, we’ll have to put you in your own cell if you keep causing trouble!” He shouted at Milton.
He finally calmed down and laid on his bed. Pawbert could feel the fierce heat on his face. His eyes started to water up. He looked around the cell, but Kitty was calming Milton, and Cattrick was just facing the wall. Pawbert swallowed his tears, like he always did
That night, he tightly hugged his scarf under the blanket. Surprisingly, he didn’t have a nightmare.