Chapter Text
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partay
mike (paladin), will (cleric), dustin (bard), lucas (ranger), max (zoomer), el (mage)
(Sunday 22.20)
paladin: so whose done the math homework
Bard: Cutting it a little fine aren’t you
Bard: And also, *who’s
paladin: right right okay
paladin: but have you done the homework
zoomer: there was math homework
Bard: Useless, the pair of you
paladin: please will you send yours dustin
paladin: @Bard @Bard @Bard @Bard
Bard: You have had a whole week to do it
paladin: and ive been busy!
Bard: Doing what?
paladin: planning our campain
zoomer: which is happening when
paladin: next saturday
paladin: its basically all weve been talking about
zoomer: jeez ok michael
zoomer: god forbid a girl forgets
paladin: @Bard isn’t that a good enough excuse for not doing the hwk
Bard: I guess so
Bard: [sent 1 photo]
Bard: You’re literally never gonna learn
paladin: i dont need to learn im good at math
paladin: but thank you so much
zoomer: keep telling urself that
paladin: i will
paladin: because its true
zoomer: what did u get in the last test then
paladin: that was different
zoomer: why tho
paladin: because
zoomer: a man of many words
paladin: the last test was the day after hollys birthday
zoomer: and?
paladin: we stayed up super late
zoomer: doing what
paladin: cool things
zoomer: did u watch the smurfs with ur little sister
paladin: i can’t help it if papa smurf spits some wise bars from time to time
zoomer: 🪦
Bard: Do the homework and go to bed
zoomer: thanks dusty see u tomorrow
[Bard reacted with 👍]
(22:43)
paladin: dustin your answers are wrong
(22.47)
zoomer: mike what the hell
paladin: but he got one wrong
zoomer: how do u know u haven’t got it wrong
paladin: because i know
paladin: im good at math
zoomer: what did u get in teh last test then
paladin: STOP BRINGING THAT UP
zoomer: im showing that ur not good at math
paladin: im telling you he got it wrong
paladin: ill go ask nancy if youre that desperate to prove me wrong
zoomer: is she not asleep
paladin: yeah but id wake her up
paladin: for science
zoomer: which one has dustin got allegedly wrong then
paladin: 4b
zoomer: and the answer is 49
zoomer: what did you get
paladin: -2056
zoomer:🤓
Bard: It’s definitely 49
paladin: but how do you know
Bard: Suzie checked it
zoomer: well snap
zoomer: mike what do u have to say for urself
paladin: what if suzies wrong
Bard: You’re hilarious
Bard: Mathematics State Champion remember?
paladin: salt lake city is a small state though
Bard: You’ve got to be kidding
Bard: Send me your working
zoomer: the girls are fiiiightinngggg
paladin: max
zoomer: mike
paladin: shut the fuck up
zoomer: mike
paladin: max
zoomer: no
paladin: [sent 1 photo]
zoomer: omg i forgot about how messy ur handwriting is
zoomer: i can barely read that
paladin: SHUT UP
zoomer: hahah ragebaited
Bard: I see where you’ve gone wrong
paladin: i didnt
Bard: You did
Bard: In your second step it’s +25 not -
paladin: what
zoomer: clocked
paladin: oh shit
paladin: its because there’s a mark on your page dustin so i thought it was a minus
zoomer: thats right blame it on dustin
Bard: So I was correct
paladin: well yeah i guess
zoomer: awww weve got a sore loser
Bard: Glad we’ve cleared that up then
Bard: Night
zoomer: gn dustin congrats
paladin: youre annoying you know that right
zoomer: yes
zoomer: night
paladin: ugh
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partay
mike (paladin), will (cleric), dustin (bard), lucas (ranger), max (zoomer), el (mage)
(Monday 07.39)
Ranger: U guys have got to start doing your homework earlier
cleric: yeah fr
(07.43)
Bard: Guys what do we have first
Bard: Mews ate my timetable
Ranger: Mews
Ranger: Mews your cat
Bard: Yes
Bard: She got hungry overnight
cleric: midnight snacks r fire tbf to mews
Ranger: But Mews is a cat
Bard: Yes
Bard: What’s your point
Ranger: I thought only dogs ate homework😭
cleric: yeah and cats like timetables
cleric: keep up lucas
Ranger: Right right sorry
cleric: apology accepted
Bard: Now can someone please tell me what we have
cleric: oh yeah soz
cleric: math first
cleric: then bio
cleric: wait i’ll just send you a pic
cleric: [sent 1 photo]
Bard: Thanks Will lifesaver
cleric:🫰🫰
------------------------
us
steve (twilight sparkle), robin (spike)
(Monday 07.54)
spike: DOES OUR SHIFT START AT 8 OR 8.30
Twilight sparkle: 8
spike: OKAY SO IM GOING TO BE LATE
Twilight sparkle: WELL ALRIGHT THEN
Twilight sparkle: WHY ARE WE SHOUTING
spike: BECAUSE I OVERSLEPT AND IM STRESSING OUT
Twilight sparkle: Chill out its ok
Twilight sparkle: I’m here already so you’ve got time
spike: whewf organised king
Twilight sparkle: More like I actually get up when my alarm goes off
spike: i can only apologise
spike: i was having a really good dream
Twilight sparkle: Oh how mysterious
spike: ill update you dw
Twilight sparkle: Good I thought you were gonna make me ask
spike: hang on i just need to cross the word
Twilight sparkle: Please don’t get run over
Twilight sparkle: I need you to survive this shift
[spike reacted with 💗]
spike: we’re all good
spike: road crossing was successful
spike: be there in 10 mins
Twilight sparkle: Don’t die
spike: ill try my hardest
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wheels
mike (lil bro), nancy (big sis)
(Monday 08.15)
[1 missed call from Big sis]
[1 missed call from Big sis]
[1 missed call from Big sis]
Big sis: We’re so late Mike
Big sis: Get up right now
Big sis: Michael
Big sis: I’m packing Holly’s lunch you need to get up
Big sis: I’m gonna send her up in a second
(08.17)
lil bro: im up
Big sis: Jesus finally
lil bro: im not the lords son sorry to disappoint
Big sis: Get your ass down here
lil bro: but im in my pjs
Big sis: Mike I’m serious
lil bro: no youre nancy
lil bro: fine fine sorry
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crazy together
mike (batman), will (alfred)
(Monday 08.32)
alfred: @batman where are you
alfred: youre late
batman: i know thank you
alfred: youre welcome
batman: nancys driving us be there in a sec
alfred: what did you do
batman: why do you assume ive done something
alfred: because you usually have
batman: i just slept in
batman: and made us all late whoops
alfred: even poor holly
batman: she doesn’t mind
alfred: ill bet nance does though
batman: oh you could say that
alfred: so she’s pissed?
batman: you could say that
alfred: well i wish you speed
batman: greatly appreciated
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wheels
mike (lil bro), nancy (big sis)
(Monday 15.54)
[1 missed call from Big sis]
[1 missed call from Big sis]
Big sis: I’m getting fed up
Big sis: Where are you
lil bro: ive got dnd tn
lil bro: sorry
Big sis: Urgh ok see you at home
lil bro: see ya
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byers bunch
will, jonathan, el, joyce
(Monday 16.01)
Joyce: Hey everyone, hope you’ve all had a good day
[El reacted with 👍]
[will reacted with 💘]
Joyce: What time will you be back tonight
will: ive got d&d now
El: Max and I are heading to the library.
jonathan: I can drive you both home
jonathan: I’m going to stay behind to do some printing anyway
[El reacted with 👍]
El: Thank you!
will: yayaya
Joyce: Perfect, thanks Jonathan xx
Joyce: We’ve got casserole from Karen for dinner btw
will: yesss
jonathan: Tuna
jonathan: ?
Joyce: Yes😋
[El reacted with 😃]
Joyce: Have fun and see you guys later x
[El reacted with 👍]
[will reacted with 🌸]
[jonathan reacted with 🔜]
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hellfire
eddie, mike, lucas, dustin, will, jeff, gareth, bill
(Monday 16.04)
eddie: @Lucas
eddie: you’re late.
(16.07)
Lucas: Sorry!
Lucas: Coach asked us to stay behind I’m running now
eddie: run faster
Lucas: Aye aye sir
(17.18)
eddie: well done today everyone
eddie: this campaign could be wrapped up by next week if you all play it smart
Dustin: @mike
mike: okay so how was i supposed to knwo that the troll wuld be waiting in the woods
jeff: yeah that’s kinda fair
mike: thank you
[jeff reacted with 🫡]
Bill: But it was kinda stupid
Bill: You did go in unarmed as well
mike: how about we accept i messed up and move on
will: no can we draw out your suffering a bit more please
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crazy together
mike (batman), will (alfred)
(Monday 17.21)
[1 missed call from alfred]
batman: ah sorry was in the bathroom
alfred: delightful
batman: 🤷♂️
alfred: how r you getting home
batman: idk i dont have my bike so i figured id walk
alfred: its dark out
batman: so?
alfred: remember that time that i was kidnapped by an alter dimension monster
batman: i mean vaguely yeah
batman: it didn’t really bother me
alfred: ha ha very funny
alfred: we all know you cried yourself to sleep every night
batman: i was TWELVE
alfred: so you confess
batman: it wasn’t every night
batman: only like six times
alfred: do the math dumbass
alfred: 7 days in a week
alfred: anyway
alfred: jons picking me up do you want a lift
batman: yeah id love that
batman: significantly lowers my chances of being snatched by a demo
alfred: you never know
alfred: maybe we’d get lucky
batman: oi i thought you cared about me
alfred: a little i guess
batman: awww i knew it
alfred: meet me in the car park asap
batman: what if i get snatched while walking to the car park😱
alfred: stop making fun of my trauma
alfred: and stop saying snatched goddamn
batman: why
batman: you can be snatched too if you want
alfred: i can easily tell jon to leave without you yk
batman: NO DONT DO THAT THEN I’LL DEFFO BE SNATCHED
alfred: just hurry up already
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cheerios
will (boi), robin (gal)
(Monday 17.37)
boi: goddamn
(17.38)
gal: will?????
gal: hey wait come back
gal: you can’t just drop that and then disappear
gal: will
gal: willio come back
gal: WILLIAM BYERS
gal: ok so this is cyber bullying
(18.01)
boi: sorry sorry
boi: jon asked me who i was texting
gal: JESUS FINALLY
gal: WHAT’S UP
boi: mike is up
boi: up on the list of people i want to murder
gal: what’s he done now
boi: we dropped him home after d&d which was when i sent you that msg
boi: we’re home now
boi: [sent 2 screenshots]
gal: bahahahahaha hes so oblivious
boi: do you think???
boi: like youre sure he’s not just teasing me??
boi: because he knows i like him and just wants to play with me??
boi: because he’s like straight a million times over and thinks his pathetic little best friend is sweet?
gal: will honey no of course not
boi: sorry overreacted there
boi: but he told me i could be snatched😭😭
gal: no there he is teasing you
boi: dude
gal: you ARE snatched there is no “could” about it
boi: hahah thanks rob
gal: and i genuinely do think he’s clueless
gal: like that’s just mike
gal: and i’m telling you you need to talk to him
boi: i cant🫣
boi: that would be so embarrassing
boi: and i def don’t want to mess up our cali trip
gal: wait that’s true
gal: do it afterwards then!
gal: spend some quality time together then pop the question
boi: im not engaging😭
gal: get down on one knee in front of the sunset
boi: steve harrington behaviour
gal: oh im so telling him you said that
boi: tell me im wrong though
gal: nono youre 100% right hahah
boi: 🙇🙇
[gal reacted with 💌]