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Dick dug through the pantry, pushing aside the cans and bags of pasta. He had been wanting to make something small for lunch, maybe a sandwich, but they had no bread. Frankly, the more Dick looked through the pantry, fridge, and freezer, the more he realized that they didn’t have much of anything. Well, at least, not anything he wanted to eat.
Dick hadn’t gone grocery shopping in a few weeks; the last he could remember was the day after Damian’s school let out for summer break, almost a month ago. He wasn’t sure if when he and Damian got supplies for Alfred nearly a week ago counted.
He supposes that the excitement of a new kitten could be partially to blame for the lack of proper ingredients in their home. Damian had brought the tiny kitten back five days ago, and so far, Damian had been enamored with the little cat, and she seemed to share the same enthusiasm for him.
Outside of patrol, Dick doesn’t think he’s seen Damian without a black and white shadow following him. When Damian settled himself on the couch to read a book, Alfred was on top of him, purring loudly and ultimately shoving herself between Damian’s side and the back of the couch. When Damian was sitting at the kitchen table eating dinner, Alfred would scarf her dinner down before trying to climb up Damian’s legs to try to snatch his away.
Dick hadn’t been completely sure about Alfred when Damian had first messaged and got the idea of a cat stuck in his head, but now he wouldn’t change anything. He liked watching Damian soften as he played with her, and he found her raspy meows as she begged for food funny.
Dick closed the fridge door, leaning back on the counter. It was only a little after midday, and aside from a stake-out he and Damian would be doing that night, Dick had a free day. A quick grocery run to at least grab a few things for today wouldn’t hurt. Dick could always take Damian back later to do a real grocery run like they always did. With that thought, Dick grabbed his keys, checked for his phone, and then slipped his shoes on. As he waited for the elevator doors to open, Dick looked at the clock on the wall.
12:17 PM
The general store down the street should be fine. Dick could make it back before one and have a late lunch made by one-thirty.
At that, the elevator let out a quiet ding, opening for Dick to step in, hit the garage level button, then close behind him.
Damian pulled his earbuds out of his ears, pausing the YouTube video he had been watching previously. He slowly sat up, trying not to wake Alfred, but before he could even get sat up fully, Alfred’s eyes popped open, a squeaky meow addressing him.
He stroked her back, careful not to press too hard on her small body. He pushed off his bed, making his way into the hallway and walking into the kitchen. He opened a cabinet, snagged a cup, and then watched as it filled with water from the fridge. As he stood, Alfred was walking around his feet, rubbing against his ankles, a loud purr that never seemed to stop unless she was sleeping, ringing out through the house.
Damian listened to the rumbling coming from his feet and the quiet sound of water filling a glass. He then slowly took note of the noise in the rest of the penthouse, or the lack thereof. Damian pulled the glass away from the fridge, stepping away and peering into the empty living room. The TV, which had been on at some point before Damian had put his earbuds in, was now off, and most noticeably, the person who had been softly laughing at whatever had been playing was missing.
Damian left the kitchen, turning into the hallway and beginning down it, passing his bathroom and bedroom to stand in front of the master bedroom at the end of the hall. The door was slightly ajar and was pushed all the way open as Damian and Alfred entered.
“Grayson?” Damian called, stepping towards the en-suite bathroom and looking inside.
Also empty.
Damian turned around, marching back to the living room, barely glancing down as Alfred sped past him. He quickly made it to the elevator, staring at the empty hook for Grayson’s key ring.
When had he left?
Damian paced back into the living room, pulling his phone free of his pocket and opening his messages to Grayson.
(12:31 PM)
To – Richard Grayson
Where did you go?
As the minutes ticked on, Damian stood still, eyes boring into his phone screen. Grayson never left without saying anything.
Never.
Grayson was always knocking on Damian’s door to tell him he was leaving.
Patrol when Damian was benched. Justice League meetings. Even just simple errands. Every time, Damian had the comfort of knowing where Grayson was going and a slot of time to expect him home if Damian couldn’t accompany him.
Damian was fine alone. He knew how to keep himself occupied. He was also very aware that so long as he stayed in the penthouse where every possible point of entry had alarms and high-tech locks developed by his Father, nothing would happen to him. He knew that.
However, Damian could still feel the silence of the penthouse pressing in on him.
Damian grabbed the remote, turned the TV on, and adjusted the volume louder than necessary. He sat on the couch stiffly, phone clutched in his hand, and tried to focus on the commentary of a sports game that rang throughout the penthouse.
Damian checked his phone again and felt his chest tighten.
Nothing.
He typed out another message, fingers flying across the phone screen.
Then another.
(12:35 PM)
To – Richard Grayson
Where are you?
(12:36 PM)
To – Richard Grayson
Grayson?
Damian stood abruptly, barely hearing Alfred’s meow as he jostled her from the spot she had taken next to him. He began pacing up and down the living room.
Why was Grayson not responding? Did something happen? Grayson wouldn’t just leave without saying anything.
Unless—
Damian swallowed hard, his quick stride slowing until he was standing still in front of the TV. Damian had left the penthouse when he wasn’t supposed to. Had already been benched prior to that. He had gone against Grayson’s wishes numerous times. He had been thoughtless. Disobedient.
Maybe this was it.
Grayson had made it clear that he would never lay a hand on him, but he never mentioned this. Never said there wouldn’t be other punishments.
It wasn’t that bad. Damian could handle this. Had handled far worse than sitting alone in a secure place with food, water, and plenty of distractions. Damian should be thankful. Grayson could have done worse.
He could always take away Robin.
Damian had seen him do it.
Damian walked back to the couch, cracked his knuckles anxiously, and opened his phone, scrolling aimlessly, helpless to stop his mind from fixating on the unanswered messages.
Dick gave the worker a smile as he exited the store, shifting the grocery bags to one hand to fish his phone out of his pocket. Once he clicked it on, he felt his breath catch.
His eyes quickly scanned the notifications on his lock screen.
A few messages and a missed call from Damian.
Dick unlocked his phone, clicking on Damian’s contact and hitting the call button.
Before Dick could even begin to wonder why Damian had called, he heard the call connect and a wobbly voice answer.
“Grayson?”
Dick felt his heart drop.
Damian sounded close to tears. Dick’s mind began cycling through the possibilities: had Damian gotten hurt? Had Alfred? Dick and Damian had been living together for over half a year, and Dick had not once heard Damian sound like that.
“Yeah, I’m here. What’s wrong?” Dick questioned, a tinge of worry in his voice.
Dick listened as Damian took a shaky breath. “Where are you?”
“I ran to the grocery store. Picked up a few things. Why? Did something happen?”
Dick began briskly walking back to the apartment, mumbling apologies as he weaved in between pedestrians.
“You left.” Damian spoke quietly into the phone, “You didn’t say anything.”
“I—” Dick hesitated, “Yeah, just ran to the store down the road. Figured I’d be back quick enough. Did something happen? You're okay, right?”
Dick listened as Damian sucked in a breath before quietly speaking. “Are... are you mad?”
Dick quickened his pace.
“What? No. Damian, I’m not mad at all. Why would I be mad?”
“But—” Damian faltered, “I did not listen to you. I left the penthouse; I went directly against your wishes. You said we would talk about it, but it has been five days since then!”
Dick gripped his phone tightly, a frown on his face as the apartment complex doors opened, AC rushing past him.
“Hey. Listen to me. Me leaving? That had nothing to do with what happened the other night, okay? I wasn’t punishing you. I would never do that to you.”
“You always tell me,” Damian said quietly.
“I was just picking up food to hold us over for a few days. That’s it. I wasn’t thinking, that’s on me.”
Dick entered the elevator, sliding his key into the panel to unlock their floor, anxiously watching as the floor number ticked up.
“Dames? I’m coming up the elevator now, okay? Where are you?”
“The couch,” answered Damian, “Alfred is here.”
“That’s good,” Dick murmured, “Stay there, okay? I’ll be there in just a second.”
Damian made a noise of acknowledgment through the phone.
After what felt like forever, the elevator let out a ding before opening up into the foyer. Dick let the grocery bags drop at the end of the hallway, hanging up the phone as he entered the living room, eyes immediately focusing on Damian, who had his knees pulled to his chest, phone pressed to his ear, Alfred tucked into his side.
Damian’s eyes snapped onto Dick, and he let his hand with the phone fall to his side.
After a brief pause, Dick crossed the room in four long strides, kneeling in front of Damian, who had let his legs drop back to the ground, sitting up straight.
“Hey, bud. See? I’m right here,”
Damian stared at him before slowly reaching out to grasp Dick’s arms, his fingers tightly gripping Dick’s sleeves, letting his forehead thunk down onto Dick’s shoulder.
Dick wrapped his arms around Damian without hesitation, pulling him tightly to his chest.
“I’m right here,” Dick said softly, “I’m not going anywhere.”
Damian stayed quiet, his forehead pressing into Dick’s shoulder as his breathing slowly steadied, grip loosening and shoulders dropping as the tension left him with each shaky breath he let out.
As Damian gathered his bearings, Alfred had sat herself up, gazing down at the scene in front of her with curious eyes. When she and Dick made eye contact, she meowed before jumping down and rubbing against Damian’s leg.
Dick rubbed circles into Damian’s back, who, after calming down, pulled away. Damian lowered himself fully to the ground, sitting cross-legged as he gazed down at his lap. Dick moved as well, getting himself comfortable and giving Alfred a small smile as she climbed atop his leg.
“Dames? I think we should talk about the... quiet, now. I didn’t,” Dick took in a breath, “I didn’t mean to stress you out by holding off on the conversation. I figured giving it a bit would be for the better. That was not my intention.”
Damian glanced up at Dick; his face, while a little blotchy, was carefully blank as he listened.
“If something happens, or you do something that I feel needs discipline, I will always communicate that, okay? I won’t leave you to try and guess what is going to happen next. I’ll make everything, the expectations, how long it’ll last, explicit.”
Damian nodded, eyes shifting away from Dick, “You did not know it would... affect me.”
“I didn’t. But I need you to know that I would never leave without telling you to try and teach you a lesson. Making someone scared and panicked isn’t the way to get a point across.”
Damian gave another nod to Dick, who let a stretch of silence fill the space before speaking again.
“The night you found Alfred, you said it was too quiet at home, so you left to go walk around. Can you explain that? Too quiet?”
Damian kept his eyes down, but he did start fidgeting, slowly pulling his fingers and picking his nails.
“It is not the quiet itself,” Damian said quickly, taking a sharp breath, “I am not a child scared of something that simple.”
“I know you aren’t,” Dick said gently.
“When it gets too quiet, sometimes I struggle to focus on things.” He breathed out, “and when I cannot find something to focus on, my thoughts,” Damian paused, “my thoughts become more... intrusive.”
Damian took another breath.
“Since I arrived, Father made it clear that he did not approve of my past actions. I— I do not think I really understood until he... until you had to take me in. I know that the things I did were wrong, and I do not like to think about it. That night, when I left, nothing had been working to quell the thoughts, and Gotham is rather... noisy.”
Dick hummed, bringing a hand over to silently still Damian’s fingers, which had started ripping away at his cuticles.
Damian moved his hands to his thighs, gripping his sweatpants.
“I know you ordered me to stay. But, staying would have forced me to listen.”
He swallowed.
“So, I left. I was trying to prevent it from becoming worse.”
Dick remained quiet, making sure Damian had finished before responding.
“Worse how?” Dick asked gently, “If you hadn’t left, what would have happened?”
“I do not know,” Damian said weakly, eyes faced down, “That is the issue. I do not like not knowing.”
“I know, bud. Is that why you kind of... freaked out, I guess?”
“I— I suppose so. However, it was not my thoughts this time. I was just not prepared to find the penthouse empty. It was... unnerving.”
Dick shuffled himself closer to Damian, setting his hand on Damian’s shoulder and squeezing. “Again, Damian, I’m sorry about that. I didn’t realize it would affect you like that.”
“It should not have.” Damian said, huffing and crossing his arms, “I do not understand how it does. I have experienced it before; I should not still react like this.”
“Experienced it before?” Dick prompted, trying to catch Damian’s eyes.
“When someone just leaves.”
Dick let out a breath, “Damian. I— that makes sense; you’ve had a hard go at it this last year, huh? You’ve had a lot of change thrown onto you.”
Damian let out a frustrated noise at that, reaching out to pull Alfred out of Dick’s lap and into his own.
“Damian?”
He glanced up at Dick.
“Next time I need to leave for a meeting or even just to grab the mail, I’ll make sure to let you know, okay? I don’t ever want to make you feel like this again. You won’t have to guess, or sit and wait, wondering what is going to happen next.”
Damian pressed his lips together, nodding at Dick. “Thank you.”
“The whole silence thing? We’ll work on that. I’m sure we can find a way to make it easier. If your art, phone, or even Alfred isn’t working, we can find something to help. Breathing exercises or something. Okay?”
“Okay.”
Dick smiled at Damian, gently pulling him forward until Damian was awkwardly hunched over Alfred and his face smushed into Dick’s chest, whose arms had crept up and around Damian’s shoulders.
“Dames? There's one more thing,” Dick said, “And I want you to hear me out, okay?”
Dick felt Damian nod against his chest and then pull away to straighten himself. Alfred tucked into his stomach.
“You’ve been through a lot. Especially within these last few months. New homes. New rules. New and old people coming and going.”
He paused, watching Damian.
“But you're still here. And you’re still trying. You’ve accepted the new rules that were told to you, and you try your best to follow them. That matters.” Dick said firmly, reaching a hand out to rest on the back of Damian’s neck. “I’m proud. I mean it.”
Damian looked back up at Dick. “That... does not feel earned,” he said after a moment.
Dick gave a warm smile, “It’s not a reward. You don’t have to earn it. It’s just the truth.”
Damian nodded once, saying nothing, but shifted a bit closer to Dick, hands running through Alfred’s fur.
Dick leaned himself back against the couch, closing his eyes, listening to Damian shift around and the raspy meows following every time he moved Alfred. Soon, Damian had moved himself to Dick’s side, leaned against the couch, and kitten in his lap.
And for a while, the penthouse remained quiet, but not empty.