Archive of Our Own ^beta

Ze stumbled a measly three steps past the dark oak door before he collapsed onto the cold, sharp stone, digging into the palms that he vaguely registered as his own. 

The man couldn’t hear anything past the rush of blood in his ears, nor could he feel anything but the way his heart beat against his ribs, hard enough to bruise. Part of him knows, almost intrinsically, that he’s home. He also knows that sentiment alone should be enough for him to feel safe. But even as he presses his hands harder into the ground, in hopes the harsh sting would bring his mind up to speed, he isn’t so sure anymore.

A half gasp, half sob escapes from him, echoing throughout the dark cave. Ze quickly shoves his hand on top of his mouth, muffling the breaths that were far too quick to be considered normal. And as black dots began to cover his vision, he realized that he needed to regain his composure.

So he let his hand fall to his chest, gripping onto the now tarnished material of his sweater, taking in one breath after another. The man focused on the rise and fall of his chest, the cold air that rushed into his lungs, the warm puffs of air after each exhale. He knew that if he didn’t, his mind would circle back to down under, in the fake world with his fake friends telling him fake things and–

Stop. 

He needs to stop.

Just before he left… That place, he remembered Regect calling out to him. Hence, it wouldn’t be unreasonable to assume that his friend the entity is somewhere close by. Even if he wasn’t, he knows his way home. 

With renewed vigour, Ze pushes himself into a shaky stand, leaning onto the damp rock wall for support. As he slowly moved towards the entrance of the cavern, the player hoped that whatever strength he had left would be enough to bring him up to the surface.

–

Regect wasn't a complete asshole.

Sure, he could be a bit of a jerk at times and yes, he enjoyed pissing Ze off, but it was all for the fun of the game. But when he genuinely thinks about it, could never actually bring himself to hurt the guy for real. So in the wake of the man’s absence, he’s left wondering if it was something he did wrong. Nothing particularly notable happened between the two of them to warrant him disappearing out of nowhere. At least, he doesn’t think so. But as the time that Ze’s been gone only increases, so does his concern.

He can’t say that it’s an emotion he’s familiar with, and ashamed to admit that it’s left him unsure of what to do. The entity is even more so to acknowledge the fact that every minute not spent searching for his friend has left him indescribably anxious, pacing around the house despite Moe’s desperate honks for him to calm down. Regect can’t calm down. How could he at a time like this? 

The only light in the house was the gentle glow of the lamps, and the faint stars that illuminated the night sky above. He knows the risks of going out alone at night, all of which were ignored as he makes his way to the door for what seems like the thousandth time in the past few weeks. However, right as his hand lands on the doorknob, a gentle hand holds onto his shoulder. He shifts to face the clown, but keeps most of his body directed towards the door.

“Moe, It’s not– I can’t just sit here while–”

She looks at him, eyes shiny from unshed tears, but more determined that he had ever seen her. She shook her head, and let out a firm squeak. She wasn’t stopping him from going, she was stopping him from going alone.

The entity gave her a nod, hoping that she understood the message behind the gesture despite his nonexistent head and pulled the door open. The icy night breeze flooded into the warm room, but none of the two paid any mind as they made their way onto the porch.

However, they couldn’t have made it a few meters before spotting a familiar figure emerging from the shadows. Moe squinted her eyes to better see who she was looking at, but Regect knew he could recognize that tattered black bandana and white hoodie from a mile away.

Ze.

–

Ze must be hallucinating. His hazy, malnourished, dehydrated brain must be making things up to make himself feel better, because that can’t be them. It couldn’t possibly be the real them. 

He stops mid-step, frozen like a deer in headlights, staring at the two for what seems like an eternity. The man can’t bring himself to move, afraid to shatter the illusion and be brought back to the reality that they’re not real.

But he couldn’t deny how real Moe’s expression shifted from shocked to immense relief, nor Regect’s stiffened posture and shaky breath. After a few moments of suffocating silence, Regect was the first to speak. The entity took a tentative step towards him, and the man couldn’t hide the way his body tensed.

“Dude, what the fuck?” He strides closer to the other, feigning nonchalance. Moe not too far behind, stopping just in front of him. “Where the hell have you been?”

He balled his hands into a fist to hide the fact that he was now trembling uncontrollably. Tears made his vision blurry as he felt a quivering breath push past his lips. Even though he kept telling himself the opposite, he knew it was them. And that thought only scared him more.

“Ze? What happened–” 

Before he could think any better of it, as a sob spilled out of him, the man barrelled himself into the entity, hugging the other for all that he was worth. Regect let out a worried exclamation, arms rising to his side, but quick to rest on the man’s back and pull him closer. 

He tried to ignore how the small action only spurred his tears onwards. Vaguely, he could recognize that Moe has appeared by his side, rubbing his shoulder comfortingly. It was only then that the realization dawned on him.

He’s home.