Chapter Text
It was early in the day around three am he restlessly moved around in bed. His mind has been on and off about the night the tower came to life. The bright pink beam illuminating the city in the dead of night. Huge vines wrapping itself around buildings, the pure panic racing through his veins, and his fears of failing. It made his heart beat faster. He knew it was gone, he knew it wouldn't happen again. Yet his mind always thought about the impending doom that never was to come. That's why he couldn’t rest. An Explanation to his thoughts that saw red, He was craving to get back out there. He wanted to battle like he used to before everything went down. In his mind he saw that battle zone and endless nights of constant battle never letting up until the sun rose on the horizon. That's what he needed.
That veil of darkness that hid himself from the potential of being caught from many things. It served its purpose when he wanted to be alone, when he was sneaking up on unsuspecting challengers, and for the most part it prevented his partners from knowing he left too early. He longed for them but the calling of battle urged him on; it made him think of the times his mind blanks when he's in the zone, the pain when an attack hits him, and the thrill that leaves him feeling numb. It was intriguing how his mind works one point he's there and the next his body wasn't his own. He'd come back home sore and still went and overdo it the next day. He'd be so preoccupied all day he wouldn't notice the hours tick by. It felt like he traveled through time by the next time he's aware of his surroundings he was somewhere else.
Today wasn't so different from his past experiences. It was like jumping back into old habits when he rounded that corner to the red illuminating zone. He hadn't kept up his habit ever since Corbeau and Philippe accepted him as their own. He's made promises in his head to stop himself. He thinks about what they would say when they find out. When he comes back all beaten one day or if he ended up in the hospital again. They didn’t know about that but he was so determined to not let it happen but his mind got the best of him. Here he was sneaking around not wanting to alert the other two. It was addicting; it was his thrill he intended to ride through his entire days on pain and coffee. He comes back home sore and in pain but he never complains, he continues to care by making dinner. Also he got up even earlier to make lunches for the two. He hadn't even thought about how his hunger felt. At this point it was nonexistent the abstinence fueled his mind to keep going despite his protesting muscles ready to fold as an inconvenience.
This has drawn on for a while and when Corbeau's issues first appeared it was like perfect timing. Philippe would be too focused on caring for their partner to notice Paxton's odd behaviors leaking through. He still cared for the two and acted his usual bright self but his temper was getting the best of him. He was irritated, tired, in pain, and feeling weak. When he fought Philippe over taking care of Corbeau he felt bad. It felt like the two of them didn't get along. Philippe was really quiet about everything and seemed more attached to Corbeau but could he blame them? They've known each other longer than he's known them and that's something he couldn't compete with. It’s why he'll always be second. The last one to be held and the one to drag himself as far as he could go before he ultimately collapsed. Regardless he kept going caring for both his partners like his life depended on it. He's picked up task after task caring for the city and leaving just a smidge of time that wasn't enough for himself. He didn't mind, he liked it that way.
So when Paxton one day walked into the syndicate building with ignored injuries asking for more tasks to take on, Corbeau raised an eyebrow at him. His tough exterior was in place and Paxton found it hard to read him when he was at work. It was far different from the other night Corbeau who had cried and clung onto Philippe. Then there was Philippe, always standing by his boss now he’s glaring down at Paxton. He started to assume things as the purple haired man purposely chose easy tasks from his files. Then the mention of going home and taking a break. Absolutely not. His mind wouldn’t allow that it's why he's been restless. He needed to keep himself preoccupied helping people seemed to calm that quell for the time being. Yet how could he help Philippe that silence was so deafening when he didn’t say a thing. He felt like doing anything else than being observed by the oldest. What could be in that mind he had a difficult time reading him too. Paxton felt the need to be back outside again away from the two most important people in his life. Just so he could spiral without the close observational eyes, Corbeau had already expressed a form of concern but the mention of resting felt like too much. He doesn’t know how he'd react if they worried more. He nods, withdrawing the papers from its previous location. He didn’t eye what tasks were given before he left, if he was there for longer then surely he’d be caught or slip up about what's been going on. That he hadn’t been a hundred percent honest about what he does when he's out and about. He sighs when he thinks he's far enough from the building now skimming over the papers. What. He pauses at the bottom of the page, his hands wrinkling the page. There in neat handwriting not printed it was Corbeau’s hand writing requesting his presence back at the building after he finished his tasks.
He slid the paper to the back wondering what assignments were chosen. He paused again. This was just items off of the others favorites restaurant. Though he must admit it would feel nice just to do something for his hardworking lover. Maybe that was the goal of this quest or Corbeau was just hungry. He chuckled to himself, that was a first in quite some time. He couldn’t lie that he felt his heart flutter but then his mind shifted to Philippe again and it was filled with doubts again. About that intimidating stare, the silence that is being held, the arguments they’ve had, it made him go crazy because what was it? What did he need to do to have a better relationship? Did Philippe not like him as much as Corbeau? He couldn’t shake the feeling that he was only accepted by the oldest because of Corbeau happiness. If that was true he wasn’t sure what to do. Currently he had something to do though and he planned to see it through. He walked down the street guiding himself to the restaurant he knew all too familiar. This is where Corbeau asked him if he wanted to be together with the both of them. Paxton had said yes immediately but thought nothing of that quiet part of Philippe at the time. He never guessed the relationship would eventually lead him back into his old habits all because he worried excessively.
When he left the restaurant with the food in tow, time seemed to fly by the deeper in thought he was and before he knew it he was at the entrance of the rust syndicate. Getting by easily none of the grunts bats an eye at him as it was the regular by now for him to drop in unannounced. He heads inside the atmosphere dark and calming despite the line of grunts always leading to the elevator. It was awkward for him passing by every time. As soon as he pulled himself into the elevator he sighed, finally being out of sight of people. He pressed on the button to go up to the Office mentally preparing himself. The elevator dings and doors slid open, Paxton walked into the main office and heavily placed the takeout bag on the desk. Corbeau looks up at him with those same sharp eyes he had before. “Come here” He scooted over leaving space for the trainer patting on the now empty space. Philippe loomed over the two as Paxton sat down. As soon as he did that's when he started to feel like he was sweating. It made him cautious because his vision went fuzzy for a moment but returned. Like he might've over done it today, hadn't eaten enough or had enough water for the day. He skipped it like any other day but now just sitting here made him realise he was only on the last of his adrenaline that just started to dwindle off. Still he tried to keep his composure and he held it for a while. Corbeau stared at Paxton then spoke, clasping his hands together on the table. “Philippe suggested this.” He instantly pointed out, his yellow eyes shifting to the older man. “Said I needed a break but I got a lot of work to do but then if I took a break maybe you would as well.” His partner cuts to the chase. Paxton felt more uncomfortable warmth all over, how much did he know? Were they worried? Did he do something that set them off to finally have him sit down, not to mention Corbeau pulling out the food and sliding one of the containers to the trainer.
His heart dropped when he realized what this was, he had been tricked in ordering a meal for himself and he wasn’t even sure if this was on purpose or unintentional. He still couldn’t read his partner's eyes who just stared deeply as if expecting something. He fiddled with his hands to keep himself from completely freaking out. His mouth closed, becoming suspiciously quiet not to the liking of his partners who exchanged looks at each other. He was too nervous to eat or look into their eyes. He did notice in the corner of his vision Corbeau taking some food from the bag to share a meal with him and Philippe joined in too. After a few seconds of freezing a hand lightly grazed him causing him to flinch. Corbeau drew back before letting his hand gently place back down, prying his hands away from one another. When he was back to reality he noticed the crescent shapes dug into his palms. Oops. It wasn’t mentioned at least not yet, the subject was being changed and he knew that there was a tenseness in the air that hadn’t fully left. “What did you end up doing today?” Corbeau asked as he started rubbing circles on Paxton's palms. “Helped out some people” He left out the part where he participated in the Infinite Royal last night or that he went into a wild zone and provoked pokemon to attack him. If his answer wasn’t enough Corbeau or Philippe didn't mention it or push him to speak further. Though they wouldn’t have to push because Paxton slipped up when he couldn’t keep calm because he wanted to add more. “All day so I’ve been very busy.” He drawed out the last word realizing he might have given himself away.
“Then we'll call it a day and go home after dinner. Sounds reasonable right Philippe?” Corbeau locks eyes with the man standing besides him and he nods. “Don’t you have more work to do?” “Do you know how late it's getting?” Philippe finally spoke. Paxton paused and realized that Corbeau was working overtime. Philippe was frowning as he gazed at his boss who was refusing to go home. “Oh yeah, past five pm.” He guessed the only way the other would go home is if Paxton relaxed. Then he'd do so. He ate with them and they didn't push him with any more questions. He could feel those sharp yellow eyes on him but he ignored it. He took his fill as much as he could handle in the moment which isn’t much but it's something. It was frustrating that he couldn’t eat as much as he used to but he didn't let that emotion consume him. Instead he packs up the left overs for another time, maybe he’d be able to eat more another day. He unconsciously leans onto Corbeau, eyes feeling heavy. “Time to go home lovely” The poison trainer whispered into his ear and gave him a gentle kiss. He had fallen asleep and Philippe carried him home but he wouldn’t remember that. All he knew is that he awoke in bed to the two besides him before he drifted off again.