Archive of Our Own

March 2021

cool hockey boyz 😎🥶🍺(irina coaches 💪)

Hayden has removed Shane Hollander and Ilya Rozanov from the group

hayden: guys I fucked up

hayden: like so so bad

Bood: ??????

Bood: Whyd you kick roz and hollzy out?

hayden: I’m freaking out

hayden: holy shit

hayden: rozanov is actually going to fucking murder me

hayden: I can’t even blame him

hayden: I’m going to have to let him 

hayden: can u guys set up a gofund me for my family or something 

dykstra: lmaoo like u could take roz anyway

dykstra: no need to let him we all know u can’t fight for shit man

Bood: Agree but can we focus on Pike having an actual mental breakdown for a minute? Are you good bro?

hayden: no

hayden: oh fuckkkkkkk

hayden: I feel sick 

hayden: Shane is probably freaking out right now 

hayden: this is all my fault I wish I was dead

Bood: Ok can’t lie youre actually freaking me out a little bit man what’s going on??

dykstra: guys its liek 7am its way too early for this shit

dykstra: whatevers going on its prob fine roz is actually pretty chill

Hayes: Hi guys! Why are we using this chat? The camps don’t start until June right?

dykstra: yea pikes suicidal or some shit idk man

Hayes: WHAT?? Hayden are you okay? Do you need to talk to someone?

Bood: I don’t think he’s actually suicidal hazy, trying to figure out what’s going on myself but he’s gone quiet which is kinda concerning lol

Hayes: Okay yeah I scrolled up and it’s something to do with cap? And Hollzy?

Bood: I think so? Pike wasn’t really making sense to be honest

Bood: Isn’t JJ in this chat? Maybe he knows what’s going on

dykstra: hes probably asleep like everyone should be at the crack of dawn

Hayes: I mean 7 is actually a pretty normal time to wake up at 

dykstra: yeah if ur a fucking phycopatg

Hayes: Psychopath? That was pretty close bro!

dykstra: dont fuckign patrunize me bro 👊

Hayes: Oh brother

hayden: you guys don’t understand

hayden: I fucked everything up

dykstra: oh he’s still freaking out

dykstra: yippee

Bood: Hayden whats going on man? Maybe we can help

Hayes: Yeah, talk to us! If it’s about Roz we can have a word, he's really not as intimidating as he seems

dykstra: bro that’s a fuckign lie

Hayes: Shut up, you’re not helping 

Bood: Look whatever it is it’s probably not as bad as you think

Bood: I don’t know Hollander all that well but he seems like a nice guy

Bood: And Roz really isn’t as much of an asshole as he acts on ice

Bood: They’ll understand whatever happened, you’re clearly sorry about it, it’ll probably all blow over by tonight dude

Bood: But if there’s anything we can do to help, just let us know 

dykstra: “us” “we” fuck u man

Hayes: Ignore Evan, he’s not a morning person 

Hayes: Maybe if you tell us what happened we can help you figure out what to do next

Hayes: But honestly, Bood is right, Roz and Hollzy probably won’t even care lol

Hayes: I literally can’t even imagine anything upsetting those two, they’re pretty unshakeable 

hayden: oh fuck

hayden: I’m only saying this cuz gonna be all over the internet anyway

hayden: but it’s really fucking bad

hayden: Ok

hayden: So

hayden: I have a fanmail account

dykstra: oh fuck that is bad

dykstra: that’s really embarrassing lmao

dykstra: montreal not paying u enough 😂😂

hayden: Can you fuck off

hayden: That’s oviously not the bad part

hayden: fuck I can’t say it

dykstra: jesus christ

dykstra: pike i swear to god i’m going back to sleep

Hayes: No, come on Hayden, just tell us!

Bood: Remember it’s probably not as bad as you think man

hayden: fuckkk

hayden: ok

hayden: just be normal about this 

hayden: Shane and Rozanov are gay for each other and I accidentally sent a video of them making out to brad last night

dykstra: …what the fuck

Bood: ????

Bood: Is this a prank?

Boiziau: Hayden what the fuck man? Are you serious?

dykstra: who the fuck is brad?

Hayes: How the hell does this accidentally happen??

Marly: Holy fucking shit Pike you better start counting your fucking days bro

dykstra: now you two show up huh

Boiziau: Hayden start fucking explaining right now what are you talking about man

hayden: I wish I was kidding guys

hayden: Shane and Rozanov are together

hayden: I found out like three years ago

hayden: Literally no one else knows except Jackie my wife

hayden: And Shane’s parents

hayden: And I think one of Rozanov’s friends and maybe Rose Landry too

hayden: But literally no one else knows they’re together it’s supposed to be a fucking secret

Price: I also knew they were together

Boiziau: Price??? What the fuck??

Boiziau: No offense 

hayden: ??????

hayden: They told you??

Marly: Okay theyre together forreal?? And they told you before any of us Pricey??

Marly: No offence man lol

Marly: Is it cuz your gay too?

dykstra: what the fcuk is happenign 

dykstra: did we know pricy is gay??

Bood: Yes

Marly: Yes

Hayes: Yes

Boiziau: Yes

hayden: Yes

Price: Yes. I’m just a pretty private person in general I guess so it’s not that public but it’s also not a secret. I’ve been with my boyfriend for four years now. 

Price: Also Shane and Ilya didn’t tell me, I walked in on them making out during camp last summer. 

Price: Twice. 

Marly: Lmfaoooo get it cap 💪💪

Boiziau: You’re taking this well Marleau

Boiziau: Did you know they were together?

Marly: Nah 

Marly: I mean I did sometimes get a vibe from Roz but I figured he was just European yk

Marly: But Hollzy is hot as fuck I’d go gay for him too man

Bood: Okay then. 

Marly: Bro don’t act like I’m the weird one

Marly: Like if you had to pick one guy in the league to go gay for it would be Hollzy right

Bood: I’ve really never thought about it

Marly: Ok weirdo

Hayes: I think Roz is probably bisexual tbh

Bood: That kinda makes sense actually

dykstra: guys whatv teh fucj do u realise what this mesns  

dykstra: caps secret girlfriend is actually SHANE MOTHERFUCKIBNG HOLLANDER

dykstra: what a fuckin pull man

Marly: See Dickster gets it 💪💪

dykstra: don’t fickibg call me taht bro 👊

Hayes: No holy shit guys Evan is right this explains everything

Hayes: We couldn’t figure out why Roz was always so secretive

Hayes: Always texting some mysterious person, never available on our days off, sneaking out of team hangouts early…

Hayes: We had a team betting pool on it

Hayes: I fully thought he had a secret double identity as a superhero but this makes so much more sense

Bood: Damn I had money on him being a Russian spy

Bood: Or maybe in the mafia, I kept it open-ended

dykstra: u guys are idiots i knew rozy was in a secret relationship 

dykstra: i did think he was having an afair with justin trudeau’s wife but i feel like i shud still get points 

Bood: Nope doesn’t count bro

dykstra: wtf i fully called it 

Hayes: My guy you did not call Roz being in a secret relationship with SHANE FUCKING HOLLANDER be serious brother

dykstra: bro come on i deserve half points at least

Hayes: No can do, it was all or nothing bro

Boiziau: So we’re all just completely fine with Shane and Rozanov being together

Boiziau: No one has a problem with any of this

Marly: Do u have a problem bro

Marly: Because if u don’t fuck with gay people Im kicking u out of this chat

Marly: Cool hockey boyz ONLY 👊🥶 

Boiziau: I don’t have a problem with gay people

Boiziau: I’ve literally spent the last three years trying to set Shane up with guys

Boiziau: I just don’t get why he kept his relationship a secret from us all

Boiziau: Apart from Hayden apparently

hayden: He didn’t really tell me, I sort of figured it out

Boiziau: You figured it out?? Bullshit

hayden: Well I guess it was mostly Jackie

Boiziau: Okay I can actually believe that

hayden: Rude but yeah, she had this theory after Roz moved to Ottawa and Shane stopped going to see his Boston Lily that Lily and Roz were actually the same person

hayden: Honestly I kinda thought she was crazy but I asked Shane straight out after training one day and he confirmed it

Marly: Boston Lily?? Lmfao we had Montreal Jane 💀💀

Bood: Lily and Jane? Jesus christ they weren’t fucking subtle were they

Hayes: I mean to be fair it did work for this long and we only put it together after we already knew they were a couple

dykstra: bros are we stupid 😔

Marly: Nah

Marly: Well maybe pike but the rest of us are fine

hayden: Thanks man 🙏 

Hayes: Okay but the real question is how long is this long? Marly if they were already a thing when Roz was in Boston it’s like at least three years right? That’s pretty fucking serious

hayden: Bro it’s really fucking serious

hayden: Like I think they’re gonna get married serious

Hayes: Holy shit

Marly: No fucking way

Boiziau: Guys boston Lily has been a thing for I don’t even know how long

Boiziau: Like since before we won our first cup I'm pretty sure

Hayes: Like since before 2015?????

Bood: Holy shit guys

Bood: This is like soulmate shit

Hayes: Marly do you remember when you first heard about “Montreal Jane”??? Was it before 2015??

Marly: Honestly not sure boys

Marly: I know Rozy was always crazy into her

Marly: Him

Marly: Lol can’t believe Montreal Jane is actually Shane hollander 😂

Marly: Roz used to come back from their hookups looking like a wildcat had gone to town on his back lmfao

Marly: Who knew hollzy was secretly such a freak 🤣

hayden: Jesus

dykstra: gross

Bood: Could have gone my whole life without knowing that thanks man 👍

Marly: Ok don’t be homophobic guys not cool

dykstra: fucks sake

hayden: Ok great we’re all super supportive of Shane and Roz now can we focus please

hayden: I think I fucking ruined their lives 

hayden: Rozanov is going to chop me up into little pieces and display them outside the bell centre

hayden: And I fucking deserve it

hayden: Can you guys tell my family I love them

dykstra: pike is still having a breakdown someone fix him 

Bood: Hayden what’s up? You never told us what the actual problem is dude

Marly: Let us help u bro 😎 tell big papa ur problems

hayden: ???? Did u guys miss the part where I said I fucking videod them making out and sent it to brad????? 

Marly: Bro why the fuc would u do that

Marly: Thats fucked up man

hayden: Clearly it wasn’t on fucking purpose!!!!!

hayden: Jesus christ you guys 

Bood: Oh I did miss that actually

Bood: Wait who’s brad?

Hayes: Yeah I was wondering that too

Boiziau: Hayden are we meant to know who this Brad is???

dykstra: is he a player?

Marly: I think Hammy’s first name is brad 🤔 

Hayes: You think?! 

Bood: Dude Hammersmith’s been on your team for like ten years

hayden: Forget brad he’s not important

Marly: Bro your the one who keeps bringing him up

dykstra: seriously who the fuck is brad

Marly: If its Hammy I’ll make sure he keeps his mouth shut 👊 

hayden: Jesus you guys are so annoying

hayden: Brad is not fucking relevant!!!!

hayden: He’s just some random fucking Montreal fan

hayden: Not fucking Bradley Hammersmith!!

Marly: Wait Montreal has fans???

dykstra: haha nice 👌 

hayden: Guys! Focus!

hayden: I am literally fucking begging here

hayden: I was filming a fanmail video for this guy Brad

hayden: and i didn’t notice but you can see Shane and Roz through the reflection of a window 

hayden: acting like theyre on a fucking mission to birth a whole fucking hockey team

hayden: But I didn’t see them until after I sent the video

hayden: And Brad fucking posted it on twitter 

Price: Oh you really messed up man

Marly: Fucking christ Pike

Bood: Okay that’s a lot worse than I was expecting

Hayes: I don’t know how we can help you with this one Hayden holy fucking shit

dykstra: dude you shat the fuckign bed ur on ur own

Marly: Yeah if Roz asks I had no knowledge of any of this shit

dykstra: he’s going to fcukin tear u apart man

dykstra: rip hayden pike you were for sure a hockey player!

hayden: I don’t know why I bothered texting you dickheads

hayden: I should have known you’d all be fucking useless 

Marly: Rich coming from u pike

Marly: I just texted Roz but he hasn’t replied

Marly: Have any of u gotten through to them?

hayden: No I’ve been blowing up Shane’s phone all morning but he hasn’t said anything back

hayden: fuck im definitely getting murdered today

Bood: Messaged them both but no response 

Boiziau: Yes I also texted Shane a few minutes ago but he hasn’t even seen it yet

Hayes: To be fair it’s not even 8 yet maybe they’re still asleep

hayden: Bro u don’t know Shane Hollander

hayden: I’ve shared a room with him on roadies for the last ten years he never fuckin sleeps in

Boiziau: Fuck

Boiziau: Hayden you are so fucking dumb man

Boiziau: Do you not watch your videos before you send them?

hayden: My house doesn’t usually have two hockey players making out in the garden!

Bood: Ok look guys let’s try not freak out just yet

Bood: Maybe we can think of a way to fix this 

dykstra: if u have any ideas go for it man

dykstra: floor is open

Marly: Ya look we’re all here for Roz and Hollzy right 

Marly: Their our bros so we need to think of a way to help them out

Marly: No stupid ideas anything could work

Hayes: Maybe they haven’t seen it yet?

Boiziau: Shane sees everything man

Bood: They could play it off as a prank maybe?

dykstra: yea or liek a bro kiss

Bood: A bro kiss?

Marly: Ya like kissing the homies goodnight that could work 

Marly: Good thinking man 🔥 

dykstra: exactly it’s not gay if it’s ur bro

dykstra: that’s just being a good bro yk

Hayes: Guys first of all we should probably check with Roz and Hollzy before we do anything

Hayes: See how they want to play it you know 

dykstra: their not anserwing there phones tho..

hayden: I went to Shane’s place in Montreal but he wasn’t there so I’m going to head to Ottawa now

hayden: he’s probably with Rozanov at their house there

hayden: Unless they’ve both thrown themselves into the st lawrence 

Bood: Well let’s try to stay positive 

Boiziau: So we can’t talk to either of them for at least another two hours until Hayden gets to Ottawa

Marly: If he makes it there…

hayden: Bro?

Marly: Non zero chance Roz blows ur car up before u get near his house

Marly: But goodluck man!

Hayes: Okay I’ve had a look at the video on Twitter

Hayes: It’s not great

Hayes: I mean it’s actually a really great kiss

Hayes: But it’s going to be hard to deny

Hayes: It doesn’t look like a prank

Hayes: Or a bro kiss

Hayes: I mean I’m not a 100% sure what that would look like but I feel like there’s too much tongue for it to be non-gay

Hayes: Sorry guys

Hayes: But the good news I guess is that the video actually doesn’t have that many views yet

Hayes: Maybe we could try to get it taken down before things go crazy?

Bood: Hmm not sure Hazy

Bood: Even if we could get it taken off Twitter Brad would still have the original fanmail video right?

Bood: He could probably just upload it again or even sell it somewhere

Marly: Fuck Roz and Hollzy are famous enough that espn would definitely fuckin buy it off him

dykstra: so were fcuked basically

hayden: fuck guys I haven’t even finished setting up my kids college funds yet

hayden: I thought I’d have so much more time

Marly: Dw brother they probably won’t need em if they take after u 🙏 

hayden: Ok Marleau fuck you for real

Hayes: Guys please we need everyone to stay focused 

Hayes: This is about Roz and Hollzy not us 

Hayes: We can all agree being outed would fucking suck for them right?

Hayes: So we need to fucking lock in and figure out a way to help our boys before it’s too late

Marly: Fuck yeah Hazey

Bood: Damn Hazy that was inspirational as shit 

dykstra: right i feel like a fuckin avenger

Hayes: Hell fucking yeah that’s the spirit 

Hayes: Ally Avengers? Sexy Seven? Teenage Mutant Gay Allies Turtles?

Marly: ????

Hayes: I'm workshopping group names for us but you’re right that’s not important right now

Hayes: We need to focus on the mission - supporting cap and Hollzy by making a video of them kissing look not gay

Hayes: Anyone have any ideas?

dykstra: i have an idea but idk if u guys are gonna be down…

Boiziau: I’m in, what’s the plan?

dykstra: ok look hear me out before any of u start judgeing

dykstra: so right now roz and holly look super gay cuz its just the two of them

dykstra: but what if we all post videos of ourselves going to town on some guy

dykstra: just straight suckin face

dykstra: everyone will be confused as fuk but roz and holly won’t stand out

dykstra: itll just look like were all doibg some weird ass social media challenge or prank or smth

Marly: 🤯🤯Bro… you might be a genius

Bood: I’m kind of lost for words right now dude 

Hayes: I mean fuck it no one else is coming up with anything 

Hayes: You know what it’s worth a shot

Boiziau: This is so fucking dumb bro

Boiziau: But for Shane I’ll do anything

Boiziau: @hayden Don’t go to Ottawa yet mon ami pucker up for me first babe 😘 

hayden:…Dude

hayden: Lemme check with Jackie real quick

dykstra: ok wasn’t actually expecting u guys to be down

dykstra: but let’s pair up who wants me 💋 

Hayes: I’m actually in Toronto with Lisa right now… Pricey are you around? 👀 

Price: I mean I know my boyfriend won’t mind so if Lisa’s okay with it….

Hayes: Fuck yeah brother trust Lisa will be super cool

Bood: Wow this is actually happening

Bood: Dykstra I guess it’s you and me unless Marly happens to be in Ottawa for some reason 

dykstra: ok try to sound more excited pls this is hurting my self esteem 

Bood: Sorry dude

Bood: Evan!! You’re so sexy!! 🥵🥵 Let’s make out!!! 😍😍😍

dykstra: tks bro thsts more like it

dykstra: id be happy to swap spit with u bro

dykstra: assumign my wife is chill with it i shud prolly ask her first one sec

Bood: I swear to god if you end up backing out when this was your fucking idea

dykstra: nope all good caits fine with it

dykstra: she’s like kinda weirdly excited actually she wants to be the one filming us 

dykstra: is taht normal??

Bood: We’re very attractive men, can’t blame her

Marly: Dudes we should make it a competition 

Marly: See whose video gets the most attention

Marly: Full warning u fuckers are going down

dykstra: bro are u even part of ghis? who are u going to suck face with in boston?

Marly: When u look like me u don’t need to beg people to make out with u in groupchats 

Marly: Trust my boys will have my back

Hayes: Wtf even goes on in Boston

Marly: We stick by our boyz 😎🥶

Marly: Ill make the whole team mack on each other trust 

Bood: The whole team? You sure they’ll all be down with that?

Marly: Ya Im the captain so Ill just tell them if they don’t make out with each other their off the team 

Hayes: That feels kinda illegal

Marly: Nah it’s about team spirit they’ll get it 💯

hayden: Okay Jackie says we’re all fucking idiots

hayden: but the important part is she’s cool with it 

hayden: So full steam ahead bros!! Let’s fuckin play some tonsil hockey Boiziau

Boiziau: 🫡Already on my way to your place mon ami

Boiziau: You’re paying for my drinks for the rest of your life though

hayden: Thats fair bro

hayden: You guys need to really fucking sell it btw

hayden: Like if you haven’t seen the video yet go watch it now

hayden: Your kisses need to be be on that level or Shane and roz will look weird

Bood: Holy fuck I don’t even know if I kissed my wife like that on our wedding day 

Hayes: Right!! It’s kinda fucking insane 🤯 Like that’s just a normal Wednesday afternoon for them???

hayden: Yeah theyre just always like that

hayden: It’s irritating as fuck but also kinda sweet idk

hayden: If any of u ever tell Rozanov I said that Ill fucking end u 

Marly: It’s like being threatened by a chihuahua

dykstra: damn boodsy we’re about to be real close huh

Bood: Looking forward to it bro 😘 

dykstra: 😍🥰😘

dykstra: if this works u better name ur firstborn child after me pike

hayden: All of my children have names already but we could definitely do like a goldfish or something

dykstra: …fine better than nothing ig 

Hayes: Okay, mission identified, let’s fucking go boys! Spit Squad roll out!!!!

Boiziau: Can we please fucking not call ourselves that 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏

eliza! @haydenpikestenthchild
hockey oomfs wtf is going on the nhl today????

chloe is now a cens fan @icecreamnothockey
Replying to @haydenpikestenthchild
i’m so confused??? 

cens and censibility @ottawagirly
is there a reason why 8 million different hockey players have decided to post pics of themselves kissing each other with tongue or????????

GIRL IN THE CREASE @justhereforhockey
Replying to @ottawagirly
no like they’re really going for it 😭did u see pike and boiziau? GAH DAMN 😭😭😭😭

Annabel @puckherup
does anyone have an actual explanation for this?? Like is it a prank or a charity thing or what 😭😭😭

angel baby @ilyilyarozanov
Replying to @puckherup
what charity could this POSSIBLY be for 😭😭😭

delly SAW THE CENS!! @ilyasgirthycock
Replying to @ilyilyarozanov
excavating my bros tonsils with my tongue for charity 👅 

ayana🕺 @montrealwifey
Replying to @ilyasgirthycock
I mean I think everyone who’s posted so far has been involved in the irina foundation in some way 😭so it actually might be something to do with that??

angel baby @ilyilyarozanov
Replying to @montrealwifey
genuinely how the fuck does a bunch of hockey players kissing each other on the lips help the Irina foundation in any conceivable way

AIMEE @bisexualroztruther
Replying to @ilyilyarozanov
hey we don’t know ilyas mom 🤷‍♀️maybe this is what irina rozanova would have wanted

rozanov’s cigarette smoke @jointherozter
Replying to @bisexualroztruther
the concept of ilya rozanovs deceased mother being a fujoshi,,, the concept of ilya rozanov honouring his deceased fujo mother by convincing all of his best friends to make out with each other and post it online 😭😭

AIMEE @bisexualroztruther
Replying to @jointherozter
honestly that whole charity/hollanov friendship was going way too smoothly 🫩 should have known some bullshit was coming with roz 💀

angel baby @ilyilyarozanov
Replying to @bisexualroztruther
the way he hasn’t even posted anything on his own account though????? what does it all MEANNNNNNNN?????????

beckett|BOSTON BEARS!! @ilyascumsock
man why is the marleau/connors pic kinda,, 🥵

rozleau is real to me @cliffmarleaulover
Replying to @ilyascumsock
no like i didn’t even know this was an option… but now that it is 👀im gonna start a rumour….

sarah says @showmeyourcrease
wait notice how hayden, shane and ilya are all in the same video…. if i said pikanov throuple soft launch 👀😋

ELLA enchanted @shanehollandersthong
Replying to @showmeyourcrease
bitch u better be joking

Katie|shayden truther @shaydentruelove
Replying to @showmeyourcrease
there’s actually no way 🤢 I just threw up in my mouth a little

hollanderpike wedding @hollapikelover
Replying to @showmeyourcrease
as if Shane and Hayden would ever pollute their relationship by inviting that dickhead in

montreal morgan @voyageursfan3524
Replying to @hollapikelover
nah that would be hot af but haydens too strict lmao 😜he’s possessive of his mans, he don’t want anyone else looking at his shaney 

megan|og hollanov girl @megann8124
Replying to @voyageursfan3524
mind u in that vid shanes got his tongue so far down roz’s throat its about to come out his asshole 

shilya <33 @shiilyatruther
Replying to @megann8124
your mind is so beautiful thanks for sharing babe

pike loves hollander @andtheywereroommates
Replying to @megann8124
man h*llanovs are so fucking gross y’all make everything weird 🙄you guys really can’t just let two men be friends

megan|og hollanov girl @megann8124
Replying to @andtheywereroommates
I actually cannot sit here and take that from a fucking SHAYDEN shipper

shilya <33 @shiilyatruther
Replying to @megann8124
😭I’m fucking crying I wish I had like 10% of the confidence of the average shayden shipper 💀what is their problem omfg

pike loves hollander @andtheywereroommates
Replying to @shiilyatruther
This coming from a h*llanov shipper 🙄 at least Shane and Hayden see each other more than twice a year

shilya <33 @shiilyatruther
Replying to @andtheywereroommates
bro at least ilyas not married with four kids?????

pike loves hollander @andtheywereroommates
Replying to @shiilyatruther
His wife is a paid actress and the kids are reborn dolls jfc how many times do we have to go over this

shilya <33 @shiilyatruther
Replying to @andtheywereroommates
💀im just gonna scroll yall take care now

sofia☀️|hollanov nation rise! @whatinhollanation
Ok I’m trying so hard to be normal about this and not rpf on main because I know u guys are going to kill me… but I fear there’s an actual explanation for this that I haven’t heard anyone talking about yet?? like can we address the elephant in the room??

zukka renaissance! @sifuhotman
Replying to @whatinhollanation
address it babes cos I’m fucking lost 😭

sofia☀️|hollanov nation rise! @whatinhollanation
Replying to @sifuhotman
ok but u guys have to promise not to jump me 😭

zukka renaissance! @sifuhotman
Replying to @whatinhollanation
no it’s fine im literally not even a hockey fan my whole tl is just freaking out over this and i’m nosy af

sofia☀️|hollanov nation rise! @whatinhollanation
Replying to @sifuhotman
okay 😭not trying to speculate but this is just what I’ve noticed: there’s something really weird about the hollander/rozanov kiss vs all the other ones

sofia☀️|hollanov nation rise! @whatinhollanation
Replying to @whatinhollanation
like it was the first one posted which isn’t that weird by itself BUT it was posted on twitter by some random account not associated with either of them - all the other kisses have been posted directly by one or both of the players involved on their own instagram accts

sofia☀️|hollanov nation rise! @whatinhollanation
Replying to @whatinhollanation
PLUS all of the other vids mostly just have two players making out or sometimes someone else in the background/videoing but the hollanov kiss is literally mainly hayden pike yapping on with shane and ilya just being seen in the reflection for a minute

sofia☀️|hollanov nation rise! @whatinhollanation
Replying to @whatinhollanation
which is the weirdest part because the hollanov video is literally a fanmail made by pike for some random mtl fan like if u watch the full video pike is clearly talking to a fan, wishing him happy birthday, all that shit, like hollanov are clearly NOT MEANT to be in the video at all 

sofia☀️|hollanov nation rise! @whatinhollanation
Replying to @whatinhollanation
🚨‼️that’s just my opinion tho!!!!! i could be wrong!!!!! not trying to get involved in ship wars!!!!‼️🚨

zukka renaissance! @sifuhotman
Replying to @whatinhollanation
wait so ur saying the first one might be real? and the others are like a coverup????? this tea is so fucking hot omfgggg 😌lowkey this is making me want to become a fan, is hollanov like hockey larry???

sofia☀️|hollanov nation rise! @whatinhollanation
Replying to @sifuhotman
girl dm me 😭don’t say that out loud the shaydens are circling 😭😭

pike loves hollander @andtheywereroommates
getting really sick of h*llanovs on here thinking they know everything…. 

shanehayden for life @shayshayshayden
Replying to @andtheywereroommates
man 100% they’ve gotten way too comfortable and i just know this “kiss” will make them fucking unbearable 🫩

becca (FUCK ILYA ROZANOV) @montrealvoyageursfangirl
Replying to @shayshayshayden
when are they ever not insufferable let’s be real 😞 but yea this is just going to fuel their delusions so bad 🤢

shayden lives! @shanepike2435
Replying to @montrealvoyageursfangirl
can we go back to doxxing them or smth?? i’m tired of seeing their brain dead takes on the tl

Katie|shayden truther @shaydentruelove
Replying to @shanepike2435
don’t get me wrong love shane down but why would he post a vid kissing fucking ROZANOV of all people 😭i know my pookie is chronically offline but like seriously he chose the WORST POSSIBLE person to make out with 😭

shanehayden for life @shayshayshayden
Replying to @shaydentruelove
lol he was prob trying to make Hayden jealous 🤣and r*z is such a manwhore you know he’d be down for anything

pike loves hollander @andtheywereroommates
Replying to @shayshayshayden
I’m so fucking sick of rosanov trying to insert himself into shaydens life 🙄like take a fucking hint THEY DONT LIKE YOU

becca (FUCK ILYA ROZANOV) @montrealvoyageursfangirl
Replying to @andtheywereroommates
no fr i feel like he’s been so obsessed with shane lately and shane is too sweet to tell him to fuck off 🤬like get a job!! stay away from haydens baby!!!!

pike loves hollander @andtheywereroommates
Replying to @montrealvoyageursfangirl
starting a whole ass charity just to try and make a move on shane…. it’s giving pathetic, desperate, delusional lmfaooo

AIMEE @bisexualroztruther
Replying to @andtheywereroommates
You guys are actually sick in the head if you’re seriously suggesting that Roz set up the Irina Foundation, a charity he has literally explicitly stated is to honour his mom after she died by suicide, just to try to get laid

AIMEE @bisexualroztruther
Replying to @bisexualroztruther
Like don’t get me wrong I do think rpf is mostly harmless but it gets to a fucking point you guys not everything is about your dumbass ships 🤧

pike loves hollander @andtheywereroommates
Replying to @bisexualroztruther
188.151.43.150 does that look familiar?

AIMEE @bisexualroztruther
Replying to @andtheywereroommates
You want to fight? Pull up to my house bitch, let’s fucking go

CENS STANLEY CUP 2022 @neighneighbitch
shaydens and hollanovs warring on the tl again,, meanwhile me and the three other boodstra shippers are kissing each other on the mouth with tongue just like our boys 🥰

tanner dillon appreciator @tannerdillonlover47
Replying to @neighneighbitch
no like as someone who only likes rarepairs this is the best day of my life 😭this one video of ryan price making out with wyatt hayes will feed me for generations 

lila is an admirals fan @shiftthisstick
I’m confused????? What on earth could possibly have prompted this? Is it like a dig at Hunter or something?

trinity🔥🥵|ilya rozanov defender @rozanovsbiceps
Replying to @shiftthisstick
wow the scott hunter fan is confused fork found in kitchen

lila is an admirals fan @shiftthisstick
Replying to @rozanovsbiceps
wow the rozanov fan is a bitch plug found in asshole

trinity🔥🥵|ilya rozanov defender @rozanovsbiceps
Replying to @shiftthisstick
okay that made me laugh u can live 😭honestly don’t think it has anything to do with hunter, ottawa is just a fucking circus and hollander, pike and boiziau have gotten caught up in it through the irina foundation lmao

lila is an admirals fan @shiftthisstick
Replying to @rozanovsbiceps
Okay, thank you, that kind of makes sense (as much sense as anything involving Rozanov ever does lol)

trinity🔥🥵|ilya rozanov defender @rozanovsbiceps
Replying to @shiftthisstick
,,,omg 🩷💐,,, did we just become best friends 😍😝,,, should we make out 🥵🥵

lila is an admirals fan @shiftthisstick
Replying to @rozanovsbiceps
Immediately you ruined it, goodbye 👋 

trinity🔥🥵|ilya rozanov defender @rozanovsbiceps
Replying to @shiftthisstick
nooo don’t block me ur so sexy aha

Ryan @hockeyfan1988
Wtf has hapened to this beautiful sport 🤬 We used to have real men fighting for their teams and now it’s been taken over by a bunch of fags kissing each other 😡 We need to quit letting these queers distract their teams with their lgbt bullshit and take back hockey for the REAL MEN 😡😡

caoilfhionn✨@hollanderbackgirl
Replying to @hockeyfan1988
mind u like half the guys who posted are Stanley cup winners 🤫 

chloe is now a cens fan @icecreamnothockey
Replying to @hollanderbackgirl
no like take hockey back from??? shane hollander?? ilya rozanov?? even pike, boiziau, marley & most of the rest of the boston guys all have at least one stanley cup like can we please be serious 🫩

GIRL IN THE CREASE @justhereforhockey
Replying to @hockeyfan1988
literally like the only out queer hockey players are hunter and bennett (who won the cup together) and barrett who’s one of ottawas best players like if u think u can outplay any of them go for it Ryan

trinity🔥🥵|ilya rozanov defender @rozanovsbiceps
Replying to @hockeyfan1988
yeah Ryan come on show us what a real man is 😭 Ryan 1v1 vs ilya rozanov let’s go babes winner gets to take back hockey 

sarah says @showmeyourcrease
Replying to @rozanovsbiceps
funniest part is u know roz would actually be down,,, like cmon Ryan what are u waiting for bro I thought you had something to say??

caoilfhionn✨@hollanderbackgirl
Replying to @showmeyourcrease
lmfao not Ryan going quiet 💀 ig real men let themselves get bullied off the internet by teenage lesbians 😭🙏

AIMEE @bisexualroztruther
rozanov hasn’t even posted but somehow his influence is all over this,,, something weird is going on guys idkkk

angel baby @ilyilyarozanov
Replying to @bisexualroztruther
no like where is he 😭I know that man is chronically online why is he not posting anything 

rozanov’s cigarette smoke @jointherozter
Replying to @ilyilyarozanov
his silence is lowkey freaking me out 😭 why do I feel like he’s in our walls

sofia☀️|hollanov nation rise! @whatinhollanation
Replying to @jointherozter
maybe hollzy threatened to divorce him if he posted them making out on main 💀

lets go cens! @ottawafangirl
Replying to @whatinhollanation
shippers seeing ships everywhere they go 🙄 it’s prob because he’s russian idk how involved he can get in this without getting into trouble over there 

AIMEE @bisexualroztruther
Replying to @ottawafangirl
oh yeah that’s a good point actually 😞 damn let my man speak i know he’s got shit to say lmfao

trinity🔥🥵|ilya rozanov defender @rozanovsbiceps
ok yall know im a roz girly for life but did u guys see that hammersmith/carmy kiss???? like that did something to me guys i can’t lie

lila is an admirals fan @shiftthisstick
Replying to @rozanovsbiceps
Yeah not a Boston fan but that was pretty hot tbf 

trinity🔥🥵|ilya rozanov defender @rozanovsbiceps
Replying to @shiftthisstick
wait i thought u blocked me how come ur in my replies 🤨

lila is an admirals fan @shiftthisstick
Replying to @rozanovsbiceps
Omg you’re so annoying can’t I just reply to tweets I see on my tl without it being a whole thing

trinity🔥🥵|ilya rozanov defender @rozanovsbiceps
Replying to @shiftthisstick
be honest do u have a crush on me 😘😜

Annabel @puckherup
Is this weird as fuck? Yes. Do I have a single fucking clue what’s going on? No. Do I care? Nope, the end result is that we get to see hot hockey guys making out with each other so really idgaf a win is a win

beckett|BOSTON BEARS!! @ilyascumsock
Replying to @puckherup
yea like i don’t get why people are mad about this… yall really can’t just shut up and take a blessing when it’s handed to u lmao

Annabel @puckherup
Replying to @ilyascumsock
exactly lmao I have no idea what’s going on but I’m just having fun over here 😭

denis|DNI IN BIO|@scotthunterfan
great just what the world needed a whole group of obviously straight hockey players making out with each other to profit off queer identities while completely failing to engage with actual lgbtq+ causes in any meaningful way 😮‍💨 

Alex|back on my bullshit @makinghockeygayagain
Replying to @scotthunterfan
girl have a day off I really don’t think it’s that deep

troy barrett you have charmed me @unfortunatelyacensfan
Replying to @makinghockeygayagain
only on hockeytwt could you get generational takes such as: fellas is it homophobic for two guys to make out?

caoilfhionn✨@hollanderbackgirl
Replying to @unfortunatelyacensfan
istg every time I log in on here I lose braincells 🫩

troy barrett you have charmed me @unfortunatelyacensfan
Replying to @hollanderbackgirl
like why is everyone so determined to see everything in the worst possible light all the time 😭mind u if you actually cared enough to do ten seconds of research you’d see ottawa is one of the only teams to have an openly gay player (Barrett) and the whole team has literally been nothing but supportive

troy barrett you have charmed me @unfortunatelyacensfan
Replying to @unfortunatelyacensfan
and Barrett literally said playing for Ottawa is what helped him feel comfortable enough to come out publicly PLUS literally all of the players posting these vids have volunteered at the Irina foundation camps which are known for hiring queer/diverse coaches and staff like Leah and Max Riley 

troy barrett you have charmed me @unfortunatelyacensfan
Replying to @unfortunatelyacensfan
AND none of these guys have been anything but positive when they’ve been asked about the queer community, like Hollander called Scott Hunter brave for coming out, Marly said the NHL could do with more queer players, Hayes has a lesbian sister and literally always uses stick tape in the lesbian flag colours for pride night…

troy barrett you have charmed me @unfortunatelyacensfan
Replying to @unfortunatelyacensfan
Like if u want to talk about homophobia in the league go off cuz it’s definitely still a massive issue but why are we villainising the few good players who are actually trying to do something about it?? 

caoilfhionn✨@hollanderbackgirl
Replying to @unfortunatelyacensfan
damn oomf get them again lmfao 😭 

AIMEE @bisexualroztruther
im fucking crying half the tl calling them homophobic and the other half being homophobic to them 😭😭😭 whole house mad lmaoo

ELLA enchanted @shanehollandersthong
Replying to @bisexualroztruther
hey don’t forget the half just celebrating getting to see hot men make out with each for free 😭

AIMEE @bisexualroztruther
Replying to @shanehollandersthong
oh ur right mb 😭🙏this is like officially one of the weirdest days in nhl history 

ELLA enchanted @shanehollandersthong
Replying to @bisexualroztruther
😭do u think they ran this past their social media teams or like did they just go crazy??

AIMEE @bisexualroztruther
Replying to @shanehollandersthong
oh there is no fucking way any social media manager would agree to this shit 💀they’re probably having their accounts taken off them as we speak lmfao

ELLA enchanted @shanehollandersthong
Replying to @bisexualroztruther
😭rip kings at least yall went out doing what you loved 😭(being gay asf)

shane hollander defence squad @hollandersthighs
idk why people are making a big deal about the hollander/rozanov kiss being posted on twitter first, they were obviously just filming their video together and happened to get caught in the background of pikes fanmail by accident 

shane hollander defence squad @hollandersthighs
Replying to @hollandersthighs
did hayden pike just retweet this????!?!!

hana|4th CUP INCOMING!! @montrealvoyageursgirl
Replying to @hollandersthighs
lol he’s probably tired of the crazy shippers trying to make it into a thing lmao

shane hollander defence squad @hollandersthighs
Replying to @montrealvoyageursgirl
😭to be fair that would be a crazy video to get without context

hana|4th CUP INCOMING!! @montrealvoyageursgirl
Replying to @hollandersthighs
lmao no imagine u think ur just getting a normal birthday greeting from ur fave hockey player and then there’s the literal two best players of this generation passionately making out in the background 💀💀

shane hollander defence squad @hollandersthighs
Replying to @montrealvoyageursgirl
please lmao id actually be so confused 😭😭 no wonder that guy thought they were together fr

hana|4th CUP INCOMING!! @montrealvoyageursgirl
Replying to @hollandersthighs
lmfao poor guy thought he uncovered the biggest scandal in hockey history 😭he was probably trying to figure out how to sell his video to espn 😭

shilya <33 @shiilyatruther
Replying to @montrealvoyageursgirl
ok but hollanov full video release when??? 👀👀👀

marco 🩷💜💙|STREAM GOOD 4 U @marcothethroatgoat
NOT SHIPPING but can we talk about how HAWT that hollander/rozanov kiss was??? like they were really going for it goddamn

megan|og hollanov girl @megann8124
Replying to @marcothethroatgoat
I wish we had a better view 😭😭why did that kiss have to be videoed at the worst possible angle

Chris 🍺🥶 @saturdays4daboyz
Replying to @megann8124
lol they prob weren’t actually kissing, just camera angles 

megan|og hollanov girl @megann8124
Replying to @saturdays4daboyz
did you watch the video??? they were 100000000000% making out for real

Chris 🍺🥶 @saturdays4daboyz
Replying to @megann8124
no it’s like actors on tv shows, they don’t actually kiss it’s just camera angles making them look closer than they actually are

Chris 🍺🥶 @saturdays4daboyz
Replying to @megann8124
plus roz is obviously straight no way he’d ever make out with a guy

megan|og hollanov girl @megann8124
Replying to @saturdays4daboyz
first of all wtf type of tv are u watching because i assure u actors very much do fully make out with each other and secondly roz and hollzy are fucking hockey players not actors like there is zero chance theyd be able to give that sort of performance 😭 

marco 🩷💜💙|STREAM GOOD 4 U @marcothethroatgoat
Replying to @megann8124
unrelated but i think it’s so funny that even the homophobic guys always say roz is straight but never hollander is straight… #noticing

Chris 🍺🥶 @saturdays4daboyz
Replying to @marcothethroatgoat
bro I have fuckin eyes hollzy is gay af for fumbling rose landry still the fucking goat tho

marco 🩷💜💙|STREAM GOOD 4 U @marcothethroatgoat
Replying to @saturdays4daboyz
huh that’s like weirdly chill of u sorry for assuming u were homophobic chris saturdays4daboyz

megan|og hollanov girl @megann8124
Replying to @marcothethroatgoat
omg a normal conversation on twitter.com,,, they said it couldn’t be done,,,😳🤯

rozleau is real to me @cliffmarleaulover
so we’ve got hollzy, pike and boiziau taking part from montreal, practically the whole boston team, and then like a solid 60% of ottawa, which means?????????????

rozleau is real to me @cliffmarleaulover
Replying to @cliffmarleaulover
im trying to connect the dots but i aint connecting SHIT

chloe is now a cens fan @icecreamnothockey
Replying to @cliffmarleaulover
did u see the ottawa rookies just posted? stg its just all four of them standing in a line taking turns to kiss each other one by one 💀💀idfk what’s going on but i am HIGHLY entertained 

rozleau is real to me @cliffmarleaulover
Replying to @icecreamnothockey
i just watched it 😭i don’t think they know what’s going on either lmao they all look so confused 😭ok so this brings it up to like 80% of ottawa taking part, which means??????????????????

HUNTANOV!!! @huntanovgirly
guys not that I’m not enjoying the drama but does anyone have the slightest fucking clue what started all this??

rozleau is real to me @cliffmarleaulover
Replying to @huntanovgirly
I mean marly captioned his video with #makeoutwithyourbromonday so i guess that’s a thing? Like a challenge or something maybe?? Idfk man

HUNTANOV!!! @huntanovgirly
Replying to @cliffmarleaulover
Mind you today is a thursday

jj boiziau-pike @dyke4bike
I feel like we’re not talking enough about gayden pike and jj i like boyziau finally making out,, like i know im not the only one that’s been clocking the sexual tension between them for a MINUTE

Ashley @shanehollanderlover
Replying to @dyke4bike
my eyes have been opened… i was shayden down but idk they kinda haven’t been hitting the way they used to lately,, u might have just unlocked my new fave ship 

jj boiziau-pike @dyke4bike
Replying to @shanehollanderlover
oh girl welcome aboard 🫡 once u see it u can’t go back lmao

Alex|back on my bullshit @makinghockeygayagain
Ok but seriously where tf are hollander and rozanov?? like neither of them have anything to add to the conversation?

megan|og hollanov girl @megann8124
Replying to @makinghockeygayagain
no fr like no pr approved statement from shane? no bs on the timeline from roz? this is so out of character for them both im kinda scared 😭🙏

shilya <33 @shiilyatruther
Replying to @megann8124
did u see that kiss? it def unlocked something in them 😭 they’re probably just holed up fucking somewhere lmfao (good for them 😭🩷)

Shane

hayden: Bro I’m outside your place in Ottawa

hayden: please tell me you’re still alive

hayden: Are you with Rozanov?

hayden: I know I really fucked up but I think we were able to fix it

hayden: Like I don’t think people figured out that you guys are together

hayden: But I get it if youre still pissed at me

hayden: I’m pissed at myself, I feel like shit about all this

hayden: But I haven’t heard from you all morning and it’s really freaking me out 

hayden: Please just talk to me for a minute, you don’t have to forgive me but I just want to make sure you guys are okay

Shane: Oh sorry we just got out of bed lol

Shane: Did something happen?