Chapter Text
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Rapid Unscheduled Disassembly – the action of taking something to pieces. Or in this case, an explosion.
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Leonardo isn’t ready for this.
He should be; he knows that. What with everything they’ve been through, everything they’ve done. He and his brothers at the ripe age of twenty should be mature enough for this.
He should be mature enough for this.
But as he stands in the control hall of the Ulixes, helmet held in shaky hands while he watches Earth erupt outside the thick glass, he cannot help but feel small.
He watches the plume of fire and smoke consuming the planet. Debris flies in all directions, but he can’t bring himself to worry about that. It’s happening again. Albeit in a different universe, but it’s still happening again.
For him, this isn't the first time. This isn’t even his world.
But this is the home of someone.
He lifts his eyes, and stares at the shell of the blood-soaked turtle in front of the glass.
He’s thin, his body shaking from the effort of keeping himself up. Knee’s knocking together, fist tight around the base of what Leonardo can only assume is a split hockey stick, wood jutting out from the end and dripping with blood. The turtle brings his hand up and lays it flat against the glass and stains it red. Leonardo can’t tell if all that red is from him or someone else. He’s smaller than Leo’s family; their bewildered faces locked onto the image out in space.
But Leonardo keeps his gaze on the younger turtle, the dull blue of his eyes.
He catches the reflection of his own piercing blue gaze in the glass.
That three fingered hand leaves the glass, strings of red following it, only to thump back down again. It slides, losing strength. Leonardo watches it’s descent. Time moves slowly, the thunder and chaos from outside muffled.
“What the fuck?”
It’s whispered, breathless, and terrified.
Leonardo turns his head and Mikey is trembling at his side, running a hand over his head. Donnie’s gaze is snapping between the scene in front of him and the panels below. He’s muttering, shaking his head over and over again.
April is closest to the newcomer, a shaky hand covering her mouth. Casey is heaving, standing a little behind Raph and holding his own hockey stick. He still has the habit of pulling it out when he’s startled, even within the safety of the ship. Leonardo doesn’t need to look any closer to see he’s looking at the other stick in those green shaky hands.
Raph is staring at the extra turtle in front of them, eyes wide and unblinking. Then, as if he felt his older brothers gaze on his shell, he turns his head and stares. His eyes flit back and forth between the two. Leonardo can see the cogs of his brain working double time, until he finally steps forward towards the trembling turtle.
“What the fuck??” Mikey says louder.
The other turtle’s body whips around, both hands wrapping securely around the severed hockey stick, posing for a fight.
Leonardo shuffles forward. His voice is shaky, but he swallows hard in an attempt to speak soothingly.
“Hey-” -he gestures towards his family- “-it’s ok, we aren’t going to-”
He’s cut off as a small, broken whimper leaves the throat of the newcomer, and his trembling legs finally cave in as he crumples to the floor.
But before Leonardo can rush to catch him, Raph gets there first, kicking the hockey stick out of the way and sliding down underneath the falling body. He doesn’t hesitate in wrapping his arms around him and hoisting him up to lean against his own plastron, leaving his hands and front slick with blood. Smart, Leonardo thinks. They have no idea what happened to this kid. He could choke on his own blood and end up like the rest of his planet.
Raph pants, head snapping towards the others as he cradles a lolling head. “Get Fugitoid. Now!”
Mikey is already scrambling towards the door, pushing past Donnie and yelling for the robot before Raph can start barking at him to get a move on. Leonardo watches his youngest brother leave, hitting the doors button multiple times and scrambling through. Before he disappears into the hallway, he turns back for a second, hand curled around the frame and gives Leonardo a look. Then, with one last glance at the kid on the ground, he sprints away.
“Oh yeah, just stand there looking stupid will ya.”
Leonardo starts, turning around to see his red-clad brother glaring at him.
“Donnie’s busy, help me carry him.” Raph hisses, jerking his head in the direction of their brother who is fiddling with the console behind them.
Leonardo drops his helmet to the ground and strides over. He takes a shaky breath, then leans down and tucks his hands under the boy’s arms, while Raph takes his legs. He doesn't bother trying to avoid the blood, it’s impossible to with how much of it there is.
“On three. One, two-” Raph hoists him up, gritting his teeth- “-three.”
Either one of them could have carried him on their own. The boy is light, a lot scrawnier than any of them. But with the way the two brother’s hands are shaking, coated in shiny red, they aren't in a good state to even try.
Now, as they make their way to the med bay, Leonardo can get a better look at the kid.
He’s a pale washed out green, in more of a sickly way then naturally. Leonardo can easily imagine him with the same rich, healthy colour of any one of his brothers. Marks and blemishes splatter across his skin, almost like the freckles Mikey has in clusters on his face except these travel down his arms and neck. His plastron is mostly covered with thick bandages that wrap around his shell. From this angle, Leonardo can see four huge stains on his shell, almost like the four dotted side of a dice. As they manoeuvre through the doorway into the med bay, Leonardo starts as he watches the covered wounds ooze more liquid. He knows his brother saw it; from the way he grunts and walks faster to one of the four empty cots lined up in the stark white room.
“Lay him on his front.” Raph says, laying the kid on the edge of the bed and rolling him onto it. Leonardo listens, still unsure how to speak as he watches the white sheets bloom with red.
Just as Leonardos hands leave the boys arms, Mikey comes bursting into the room, cheeks flushed with extortion. The robot comes in after him, looking as frazzled as a robot with no face can be.
“Move aside gentlemen.”
The robot steps forward and doesn’t ask anything, only stares at the scene, analysing for a second before busying himself with the bandages. Seems like Mikey must have told him some stuff before they got here.
The brother in question stands there craning his neck, morbidly eager to finally get a good look at the kid on the cot, drenched in blood.
‘He’s just like us. That’s so weird!” Despite the robot trying to wave him away, he still manages to squeeze himself next to the bed. He leans down, eyes sparkling and Leonardo winces as he pokes the poor boy's cheek.
“He kinda looks like you Leo.”
Leonardo takes a shaky breath. So, he wasn’t the only one who noticed that.
Mikey turns to him while wiping his bloody fingertip on the soiled sheets. “His eyes I mean. A lot smaller than you. Skinnier too, but his eyes-”
“Leonardo? Are you quite alright?”
The turtle blinks rapidly. His head is foggy, but he grits his teeth and looks down at Fugitoid and the metal hand waving in his face anyway. He gently bats him away and clears his throat.
“I’m alright. Focus on the kid alright?” Fugitoid gives a thumbs up then swirls around towards the cot.
Leonardo can’t stand to look at that pale body and that red stained fabric any longer. As the robot begins to unravel the bandages, he turns and leaves the room. To his dismay, he hears footsteps approaching rapidly from behind him.
He’s suddenly grabbed and roughly spun around. Raph stares at him, a bewildered look on his face.
“Did you even listen to what he said?! You saw it yourself Leo, he looks like-”
“I heard him, Raph. I saw.” Leonardo firmly take’s a hold of Raph’s wrist and pulls his bruising grip off his shoulder. “We have more important things to focus on right now.” He says softly.
Raph scoffs, fists clenching, suspended in the air in front of him. He’s always done that when he gets agitated or stressed, arms shaking as if he’s about to go in for a punch but holding himself back. A swell of pride blooms in Leonardo’s chest. It’s basic knowledge that you don’t punch people when your stressed at the world, but he knows how hard it is for Raph not to swing at the first thing in front of him. The small positive moment is broken though, when Raph lets out a low growl.
“The world just fucking exploded, which already happened, so there ain't no point in wasting our energy on trying to fix it right now. Also, let me just remind you how that guy showed up alone, and if what Mikey says is true then that means the rest of them are-”
“Raph. Calm down, ok?”
The truth is, he’s right.
They’ve been stranded in this alternate dimension for six months already. Slowly spinning around the earth and wondering what could be going on down there. They had hardly begun their “space adventure” when something went wrong. Leonardo doesn’t understand how the ship works, but what he does know is that they attempted to travel back in time in their own world and ended up here. He doubts they would have even realised if it weren't for the subtle change in colour and tone of their surroundings. Fugitoid had apologised so many times they were all sick of it. This left them all plenty of time to roam the ship and avoid thinking about everything that had occurred back in their own world, all while Donnie and their rescuer spent days on end fixing their vessel. Plus, time to theorise what this new Earth was like. Mikey always liked to remind them that there could be other versions of themselves, but everyone had brushed him off plenty times. To think that their own counterparts were down there, living their lives while they stood watching through the glass, bored out of their minds, was a jarring thought.
Leonardo doesn’t like to think about it much. It always made him feel uneasy, like he wasn’t really himself. He’s briefly wondered what another version of him would be like. Would he also be the oldest? Use the same weapon or like Space Heroes? Despite his curiosity, the thoughts became too much for him. He vowed not to think about it again, because there was no way he would even have to, especially after the ship was fixed and they were back in their own universe.
But alas.
“How the hell can I calm down? How the hell are you so calm about this?!”
“Fugitoid knows what he’s doing Raph. I trust him to take care of the kid. And...” Leonardo grits his teeth. “-that alternate self-theory has always been a possibility from the moment we came here, right? So, let’s just take it as it is and-”
Raph throws his hands up in disbelief, eyes wide. “What?!” He laughs cruelly. “Finally taking Mikey seriously now, are we? You know he just spouts bull Leo! Yeah, it turned out to be true, but don’t act like you believed him before. None of us did. I don’t think he even thought he’d turn out to be right.”
There’s silence for a second. Leonardo swallows hard and looks away. “...even if they are-... gone, we can still get them back.” He knows he sounds uncertain, even with how he tries to hide the tremor in his voice.
“Well, what if we can’t? You know what, while we’re at it, what if we can’t save anyone? From here or back home?”
Leonardo blinks and looks back up at his brother. “What?”
Raph continues, his anger dissolving into panic. His hands are shaking. “What if we can’t save anyone? How much juice do we even have left in this thing? However much they used to teleport that fucking clone up here could have gone towards getting us back home.” He spits the words, venom dripping from his lips.
He doesn’t mean it.
“There’s only so much this thing can take before the guys can’t fix it anymore.”
He’s breathing heavily, chest heaving.
“Raph.” Leonardo grabs his brother's shoulder and drags him forward, knocking their foreheads together gently, just like how they all used to do as children. It had mostly been to get attention from another or a move during play fights. Now, the brothers had turned it into a nostalgic gesture. Leonardo knew it would work. The frantic breaths immediately slow down.
“I know. I know, ok? I promise we’ll sort it out. We don’t know anything yet.” He places his hand firmly on Raph’s front. “Just breathe.”
It take’s a minute to control the heaving gasps, but eventually they return to their steady beat. It’s worth it to see the calm wash over Raph’s face.
“Ok.” His shoulders relax and his fingers unfurl. The word is whispered, a quiet personal statement rather then something directed at Leonardo.
“Go stay with Mikey. Take him somewhere else? April and Casey too if you see them.”
Raph looks relieved at the suggestion, eager for something to do. He nods. Still looking a little dazed but seemingly understanding the good nature of the words, he turns around and cracks his knuckles, heading back in the med bay to drag Mikey out. The sound of sibling bickering grace’s Leonardos ears soon enough. He relaxes a little, relishing in the normalcy of it.
He heads back to the main hall, the comforting voices fading behind him.
Donnie has stopped moving behind the control panel. His hands are poised over the machine, but they aren’t moving.
“Donnie?”
He blinks and turns around, mask tails whipping through the air. When they slide down from his face, his expression is one that make’s Leonardos stomach sink.
“Leo I-” He rubs a hand over his face and tears his eyes away from the mess outside the window. “I-I don’t know why it was only him. I didn’t know that was going to happen. It was just a warning. I thought it would just be something to do with them, if they even existed, not the whole entire-! Why- the blood- the" He looks down and Leonardo follows his gaze to the severed hockey stick on the floor. It’s still laying where Raph had kicked it, a long smear of red coating the ground from its movement. He feels his throat constrict, as if he’s going to throw up. The past twenty minutes had been too focused for him to react like he would have. Now things have slowed down, the nausea is catching up to him. He swallows it down as he tracks the length of the stick. Despite it’s halved state, it seems it would make for a decent weapon to hold one’s own in a fight. It appears to have fulfilled its purpose considering the stained wood of the sharp end. He can just make out the jagged name carved into the body, a name he’s all too familiar with.
“Mikey was right. At least we know now. There are different versions of us. And Casey.” He jerks his head towards the object, where it reads “Casey Jones”. Jagged stars are scattered around the carving, just like their own Casey’s precious hockey gear. “Probably April too.”
Leonardo looks back up to see Donnie staring out the window again.
“Were, I mean. Because this means their dead right?”
There’s a calm sort of assertiveness to the statement. It pulls a pained sound out of Leonardo, as he attempts to hum in agreement.
“And that’s you in there.”
“He... could be any one of us Don.”
Donnie gives him a blank look, and Leonardo remembers those dull blue eyes.
His chest hurts. He’s trying not to think about the billions of people that just died because of them again. Because of him. And how the only person to survive was his own counterpart. How ironic is that?
“You didn’t know that would happen. You don’t exactly get a warning when the world ends. Even if you knew, what could you have done except try and get them up here?”
“But we did get a warning Leo. If I had just read it properly, taken more time then maybe-”
“If you'd spent any more time on that then he wouldn't be here either Donnie.” Leonardo says firmly. “It’s good we have someone. We can find out what happened. He must know something.” He hopes he doesn’t sound as desperate as he feels.
Donnie turns to his older brother, fists now clenched at his sides. His face scrunches up in a pained grimace.
“It’s not what happened to us, clearly.” He says bitterly, eyes flicking down to the crime scene again. “There sure as hell wasn’t that much blood.”
Leonardo isn't sure what to say. He opens his mouth then shuts it again, his tongue dry. It’s always been harder for him to comfort Donnie out of all his brothers. Raph’s emotions are often spiralling and random, and Mikey is easily comforted by just an embrace. Donnie is analytical. He thinks too hard about all the right things.
“We’ll figure it out Don.” Leonardo purposefully uses and emphasises that pronoun. Despite his brothers intelligence, he tends to blame himself for these things that are out of his control. He doesn’t touch him, knowing he is not fond of physical affection unless he himself initiates it. He just stands there and observes the scene in front of them. Leonardo isn’t sure what it is, his words or the silence, but Donnie exhales deeply and the tension in his shoulders eases. His fingers loosen. He gives a small thin hum, and that’s good enough for Leonardo.
He’s just about to suggest he go with Raph and the others, knowing his red-masked brother will have taken full responsibility for making sure everyone is together and safe. However, before he can even open his mouth, April appears under the arch leading to the hall. She smiles weakly at the oldest turtle, then turns her attention to Donnie. She pads over to him and stands near him, arms open slightly. When Donnie leans into the touch and sinks into her arms, she begins murmuring comfort softly near his head and Leonardo takes that as his sign to leave.
He goes quietly. Muffled voices from inside Raph’s room can be heard. Leonardo can guess what they are talking about already.
Footsteps sound behind him and he watches Casey scoot past him towards Raph’s room. He stops for a second, and his hand comes up. Leonardo stands there, looking at him and his half-curled fingers.
“I’m uh-..” He gives a sheepish grin, and his arm slowly comes down to his side again. “I’m sorry man. Crazy stuff right?” His voice cracks badly. He looks mortified.
Leonardo gives a small smile and makes a sound that could pass as laughter. Not because it was funny but because he feels like he needs it. He wouldn't go as far as to laugh in this moment, but the only way to put yourself in a good mood is to do it yourself.
Casey obviously didn't mean to make such a sound, but his face lights up at the turtles reaction. He tilts his head and his brow furrows slightly.
“Come through with us?”
Leonardo wants to. But in the back of his mind lies that pale washed out body, blood stark against its skin and every so often he thinks that could be himself and feels the need to forcefully expel the contents of his stomach.
He feels the sudden uncontrollable urge to see the kid again, to see that he exists and pick out every single detail that makes them different from each-other. Bile rises in his throat, and this time he can’t swallow it down.
Leonardo shakes his head in response and adopts the most reassuring look he can muster. Casey's frown deepens. But after a variety of conflicting thoughts flash across his face, he must decide not to start anything or maybe he just doesn’t care, because he finally gives the turtle that solid pat on the shoulder he was going to give earlier and enters Raph’s room.
Leonardo stays still in the middle of the hall, waiting for the sick feeling to die down.
It doesn’t, and within a few seconds he finds himself rushing to the bathroom. He falls to his knees and throws up into the stark white toilet, gripping the seat and hoping that he wakes up soon.