antiphrastic

a reasonably accurate picrew toon of me blue to pink shades that for the sake of artistic license we'll say are prescription strength.



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  1. Rec *

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    Summary

    Once Ed decides that he is categorically not going to rot on the Drachman tundra, dragging his ass out of the jaws of death is actually pretty easy.  ...except when it's not.  At all.  Which is most of the time.

    (AU from end of Brotherhood.)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    94,628
    Chapters:
    8/8
    Collections:
    14
    Comments:
    373
    Kudos:
    5,130
    Bookmarks:
    1,669
    Hits:
    99,852

    18 Aug 2025

    Bookmarker's Notes

    Reread Feb 22, 2026

  2. Rec *

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    Summary

    Fullmetal is standing on the doorstep, looking windswept and utterly bereft, but holding a tiny baby in his arms.

    “It went wrong,” he chokes out, his voice tight with barely suppressed sobs, and his eyes have an unusually bright shine to them. “It went wrong, I messed up, I didn't know where else to go, please, I messed up-”

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    100,206
    Chapters:
    37/37
    Comments:
    855
    Kudos:
    5,311
    Bookmarks:
    1,027
    Hits:
    105,422

    29 Dec 2025

  3. Rec *

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    Summary

    The polite way to introduce yourself to a stranger is by giving them your full name. Edward Elric has never been polite.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,676
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    208
    Kudos:
    9,631
    Bookmarks:
    1,437
    Hits:
    58,500

    18 Nov 2025

  4. Rec *

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    Summary

    In which Yuri Plisetsky began life with the name Edward Elric, and this has made the world of figure skating a significantly stranger and more alarming place.

    “Are you saying you lived a life of crime before you began skating?”
    “I’m gonna have to check the statute of limitations on a couple things and get back to you on that.”

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    54,791
    Chapters:
    5/5
    Collections:
    44
    Comments:
    1,622
    Kudos:
    11,187
    Bookmarks:
    4,972
    Hits:
    145,500

    27 Sep 2025

  5. Rec *

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    Summary

    The good news is that Lan Jingyi has found a mentor, friend, and constant companion through the difficulties in life.

    The bad news is that that’s because he’s been accidentally possessed by the Yiling Patriarch.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    28,689
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Collections:
    20
    Comments:
    2,001
    Kudos:
    20,100
    Bookmarks:
    8,465
    Hits:
    188,127

    08 Jun 2021

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    Bookmarker's Notes

    The one where Jingyi is possessedish.

    reread 4: aug 12/2021
    reread 5: nov 25/2021
    reread 6: Jan 22/2023
    reread 7: Oct 27/2023
    reread 8: jan 27/2024
    reread 9: may 7/2024
    Reread 10: oct 14/2024
    reread 11: Feb 9/2025
    Reread 12: Sept 24/2025