Chapter Text
Essek was getting ready to trance for the night, standing in his bathroom facing the mirror as he rubbed moisturizer over his face, dressed in one of Caleb's cotton undershirts and a pair of pajama bottoms. The maroon shirt was his favorite thing to sleep in now. It was a sweet reminder of Caleb, like a little piece of Caleb was with him still.
Hearing his phone buzzing in the next room, Essek cursed in Undercommon and summoned his mage hand. He had it grab a hand towel, his own hands quickly applying the rest of the moisturizer to his skin as he walked into his bedroom.
His bedroom was easily three times the size of Caleb's small one, although with how small Caleb's bedroom was that admittedly wasn't saying much. He had enough room for a king size bed, a wall-mounted television, an armoire, a vanity, and a walk-in closet, and had floor space to spare.
The bed was a new addition, something he purchased before he invited Caleb to spend the night, and it fit the modern theme well with its simple white box frame. And admittedly Essek had taken a liking to it. He hadn't needed a bed before, but now he knew how relaxing a night's sleep was, and he was making up for decades for refusing it. Sleep was relaxing in a way that trancing wasn't and couldn't be, and Essek was finally allowing himself to relax.
There was no reason, not anymore, to subject himself to only four hours of trancing every night. There was no need to try and prove that he needed less rest than Verin, that he could be more productive than his golden child little brother, that Shadowhand Essek Thelyss was above sleeping as he was too busy and important to waste such valuable time. He could stop burning himself to the ground in the name of productivity . His mother was going to hate him regardless of whether he tranced for four hours and not a second longer, or slept the days away.
Essek would never receive the love he wanted, so what use was there to scrambling for his mother's approval like a beggar combing frantically for scraps of food? Why would he settle for the rare unwitting scrap from his horrid mother when Caleb, the kindest man Essek had ever met, offered him a buffet of appreciation with every visit?
Stopping at the foot of the bed by the bench, he leaned down and peered at his phone screen. Seeing Caleb's name, Essek's heart jumped and he smiled.
He furrowed his brow as he commanded the mage hand to drop the hand towel on the bed, noticing that the phone call was not a regular call, but a video call . Caleb had never video called him before. In fact, Caleb had rarely called him at all. They both were socially anxious and preferred texting, so his request for a video call was particularly odd. Especially since right now he was supposed to be at one of those sleepovers with his friends.
Maybe he was drunk?
Arching an eyebrow, Essek commanded his mage hand to press the green phone icon and pick up the phone to hold the camera at him, lowering his hands to dry them off on the hand towel.
The sounds of a party filled Essek's bedroom. Music and loud laughter and conversations threatened to deafen Essek, but they were all overshadowed by the toothily-grinning purple tiefling with peacock feather tattoos dominating the screen.
The individual pushed their wavy amethyst-colored hair back from their face, but a lock of hair immediately fell back down over their forehead between their curling horns. Red scleras with irises that matched so closely it was difficult to make them out peered slightly downward, clearly looking at the phone screen.
When they saw Essek, they lit up. Black lined eyes widened, hiding the gold eyeshadow on their lids.
"Feck off." They breathed out. "You 're our lad's fella?" Ogling the screen, they put their chin on their hand and their elbow on the wood table they were sitting at, leaning so far forward Essek could peer down their black blouse. Their eyes went half-lidded and flirtatious. "Now how did Mister Caleb land a fine thing like ye, ey?"
Understanding hit Essek as he realized who this was. He smiled politely.
"Ah. You must be Mollymauk."
Molly lifted his head a little, pleasantly surprised. "Magician's talked about me?"
"Mm." Essek hummed, gesturing to direct the phone so he could sit down and not have to get moisturizer on the device. "He warned me you would try to flirt with me."
Mollymauk laughed, hand smacking the table. He devolved into giggles and lifted his hand to point at the screen. "Fair play to ye mate, fair play."
"I assume my partner doesn't know you've taken his phone?"
"Nah, he's a bit predisposed at the moment." Mollymauk grinned. "That's actually why I wanted to call you, one second!"
A perfectly manicured fingernail tapped the screen and it froze momentarily before the visage of Mollymauk was replaced with what Essek assumed was the rest of the room he was in. It was an off-white living room with sandy colored carpeting, a television in the background playing a music video and the large sectional tan couch in front of it. There was a nice white wood bar near an archway where Essek could just see the edge of a white marble countertop, and people were milling about all throughout the scene. A duo sat on the couch and a trio were at the bar chatting, but there in the center of the frame were the two people Mollymauk wanted Essek to see.
Essek’s boyfriend was adorably alcohol-flushed and dressed in a simple sky blue v-neck shirt and dark jeans, hair gathered into a loose bun on the back of his neck. With him was a blue tiefling Essek recognized from the picture in Caleb's study, her vibrant navy blue wavy hair past her bare freckled shoulders and flowing with every push and pull of the improvised swing-adjacent dance they were doing. She looked just as casual as Caleb did, wearing a spaghetti strap pink tank top and faded jean shorts.
Their bare feet danced over the carpet, gliding gracefully with the odd hiccup in Caleb’s rhythm thanks to the alcohol. Neither seemed to care, laughing the fumbling off and adjusting to accommodate. Caleb spun her and she giggled, and Essek figured he knew who she was.
Essek smiled warmly at the scene, tilting his head with adoration and love in his hooded gaze. He took a few screenshots, and Mollymauk must have heard the noise from him doing so because he laughed and piped up again.
"Now that right there is how I know I can trust you with our magic man. You see him having fun with a friend and don't freak out."
"Because I trust him." Essek replied smoothly, still smiling. He continued watching his partner dance with the blue tiefling woman. "The woman he's dancing with is Jester, yes?"
"Yeah, that's our Joy Buzzer. And that one over there, on the couch?" A purple finger came into frame and a painted fingernail pointed at the dark-skinned halfling woman sitting beside a green-skinned half-orc man with a white streak through his hair. "That's Veth, and next to her is Fjord, Jester’s husband." He switched over to the other side of the frame and began contorting his finger to point at people without getting in the way.
"This here is Beau, she's an arsehole. That's Beau's girlfriend and my best friend Yasha, she's the best. And that firbolg bloke there is Caddy Shack, he's our newest addition. Well, aside from you, 'course."
Essek could see when Caleb noticed his phone being held up and talked to and he preemptively winced, witnessing the double take and the widened cobalt eyes of his partner.
"Mollymauk!" Caleb shouted, storming toward Mollymauk and by proxy Essek, growing in the frame until Molly lowered the camera. All Essek saw was a nice wood table and a few plastic cups as he listened to Caleb exclaim angrily, "Du arschloch! You are not doing what I think you're doing!"
"Oh come on, love! I was just filming you for your boyfriend, it's not that seri-"
The frame shifted quickly, and suddenly Essek was looking at Caleb. They met eyes and Essek smiled sheepishly.
The last thing Essek saw was Caleb's glare before the call ended, and his heart sank like a concrete block in a lake.
He started typing before he could rationalize the pros and cons of doing so.
Essek: Caleb, I'm sorry. I should've hung up when I saw it wasn't you. Can you call me back?
Essek waited. He got up and paced. His anxiety began to spiral, and old emotions he'd long since buried were springing up.
Was this the end? This couldn't be the end, not over something this trivial, could it? No. Yes?
Essek: Caleb?
He tossed his phone on the bed after a minute of more pacing, deciding he should finish getting ready for bed. Maybe by the time he was done, Caleb would have replied. He was probably scolding Mollymauk right now, anyway. That was probably why he wasn’t answering.
But when Essek finished five minutes later, he returned and, with a swoop of his stomach, he checked his phone to find nothing.
Essek: Caleb, please.
He looked at the bed and frowned, remembering just a couple nights ago when Caleb spent the weekend with Essek. They'd gone out in Seeming disguises to show Caleb Rosohna unbothered, and afterward had come back to watch another shit movie while fooling around on the bed. They'd been so excited to do things like normal couples would.
The memory had Essek’s stomach in knots.
He grabbed his phone and left the bedroom, heading down the stairs of his tower to his personal library. There was no way he was going to sleep or trance now, not with his anxiety so heightened.
Caleb would get back to him when he could. He wasn’t like Durth or his father. He wouldn’t give Essek the silent treatment or disappear never to be seen again. He’d take some time to compose himself, but he’d come back. Essek just needed to wait.
He sent another text as he booted up his computer.
Essek: I know this is less about your friends knowing about me and more that I disrespected your wishes. I'm truly sorry, it won't happen again, Caleb, I promise.
Essek reread his text and winced, getting flashbacks of saying the same things to his mother and Durth.
This was the last text, he promised himself. No more pleading, no more pressuring. If Caleb needed space, he needed to give Caleb space and trust that Caleb would come back when he was ready.
Trust. It was harder than people made it out to be.