Archive of Our Own ^beta

Trilla had not known the true meaning of fear until the day she watched her Master walk out of the cave, leaving a number of younglings in her care.

She had begged Master Junda not to go, believing herself not ready for the responsibility. But things were different now that the Clones had turned on them. Different now that the Republic no longer existed, and the majority of the Jedi had been wiped out. Although it had been hard for them to find this information, being hidden away in the cave system as they were, they had been able to gather a sense of how dire their situation had truly become.

Putting on a brave face for the younglings, Trilla and her Master had done what they could to keep them safe. The cave system they had taken refuge within was vast enough that they had room to breathe, clean water to drink and creatures to hunt for food, but it was obvious they wouldn’t be able to stay there long-term. They would need to find somewhere to go, preferably on a planet in the Outer Rim, should they be lucky enough to get their hands on a ship.

It hadn’t taken all that long for a patrol to find them. Master Junda had looked her in the eyes, telling Trilla the only way to keep them safe was if she stayed behind to guard the younglings while her Master led the patrol away. Trilla hated that plan, and told Master Junda as such, claiming they needed to stick together and that no good would come from them splitting up. But she was only a Padawan, and Master Junda had the final say. Watching as her Master left through the entrance of the cave, lightsaber ignited and ready for a fight, Trilla felt as a weight settled low in the pit of her stomach. 

She couldn’t afford to let her fear consume her. Not when there were a half dozen younglings who were counting on her to keep them safe. She barely slept as she waited for Master Junda to return, too afraid of what might happen if she allowed herself to close her eyes for longer than a few minutes. She could feel her strength leaving her the longer they waited. It was all she could do to keep the younglings’ fear at bay. It was palpable, filling every corner of the cave until Trilla felt as though she were suffocating. It wasn’t their fault, her own fear rising to the surface with every day that passed and Master Junda didn’t return.

By the end of the third day, Trilla realised that her Master wasn’t coming back. She didn’t know what had happened to her, but she knew whatever it was couldn’t have been good. One of the younglings had asked if Master Junda had died. Trilla didn’t have the heart to lie to them, but she also couldn’t tell them the truth, given she had no idea. She told them something unconvincingly, trying to stifle their fear as well as her own. 

Trilla started forming a plan in her mind the longer they went without Master Junda returning. She would need to find a way for them to get off this planet. A way for them to disappear into the shadows while she tried to discover what happened to her Master. Protecting the younglings was the most important task she had ever been given. She couldn’t fail. Not if it was the last thing Master Junda had asked her to do.

She tried not to entertain the possibility that her Master had left them for dead on purpose, but in the darkness of the cave, as she listened to the younglings crying themselves to sleep at night, she couldn’t help but wonder if Master Junda had decided to take her chances on her own, and had left them there to die. Trilla struggled to reconcile the thought of a Master who would do such a thing with everything she knew about the older woman. Master Junda was kind but firm, was always pushing Trilla to be the best Jedi she could be, and knew there was no way she would have left them behind.

The sounds of an Imperial patrol outside their cave had Trilla’s heart thumping painfully against her ribcage. She ignited her lightsaber, holding it out in front of her as she hushed the younglings and pushed them further into the depths of the cave, shrouding them in the darkness and whispering that it was going to be alright. She knew she was lying. She wasn’t strong enough to fight off a patrol on her own, and the younglings were in no condition to fight alongside her.

The first blaster bolt whizzed past Trilla and hit one of the younglings in the dead centre of his chest. He fell face-first into the dirt, making the remaining younglings cry out in fear. Trilla brandished her lightsaber, feeling as the blade sliced off an arm of a trooper, his blaster falling with a thump onto the dirt below. She could hear the sounds of the younglings dying around her, forcing her to fight harder, trying to protect the few she had left.

A blaster bolt hit her hand and she cried out, the lightsaber flying through the air and falling somewhere behind her. She looked around to see if she could spot where the weapon had landed, but it was too dark in the cave. The only light came from the blaster bolts and the whirl of her lightsaber before she lost it.

Something came down hard on the back of her knee, and she went sprawling into the dirt. She tried to get up, but a foot pressed down on her chest pinning her in place.

“Don’t even think about it, Jedi scum.”

Trilla’s breath caught in her throat, and she became aware of the silence in the cave. The sounds of blasters being fired had stopped, and she realised she could no longer hear the younglings. For once she was grateful for the darkness.

It stopped her from seeing the bodies.

She was hauled to her feet, her hands cuffed behind her as she was led out of the cave and into sunlight for the first time in days. Blinking hard to allow her eyes to adjust the sudden glare, Trilla looked out in horror at the transport that was waiting for her. She had no idea why she was still alive, and her thoughts dwelled on the younglings she had failed to protect. They hadn’t deserved to die the way they had, and she wished she could have been stronger. Trilla dragged her feet, trying to get away from the troopers who had an iron-like grip on her arm. A blaster was jammed into her stomach, causing her to double over in pain. 

On board the craft, she was thrown unceremoniously into a cell, cuffed to the wall and left alone. She closed her eyes and tried to banish her fear, reaching out to the Force for strength. 

“Is this all you could find?”

Trilla wished she could block her ears, not wanting to hear as her captors spoke about her as if she were not there.

“Look at me, girl.”

She refused, keeping her eyes trained on the ground. A hand gripped her hair tightly, pulled her head back so she was gazing up at the officer. The look of disgust on his face told her all she needed to know, and she wasted no time spitting in his direction. The slap wasn’t unexpected, nor was the ringing in her ears that followed.

“It seems the Jedi was right about her,” said the officer, smugly. “She is a feisty one.”

Trilla frowned at his words. These people had a Jedi? Her confusion must have shown on his face, because the officer’s expression twisted into a wicked grin.

“I suppose you wouldn’t know, would you?” he said. “Your Master gave you up, girl. Sang like a canary when she was placed on the slab. Lasted barely two days before we knew exactly where to find you.”

Trilla’s head was spinning.

Master Junda had given them up? That couldn’t be true. 

She refused to let that be true.

“Perhaps we can arrange for a little reunion between the two of you,” he continued, his voice dripping with false sincerity. “So you can thank her for the opportunity to join us.”

“I will never join you.” Her voice shook, but her determination rang true. She would fight whatever was coming. Wouldn’t let them succeed in whatever it was they had planned.

“We shall see.”