Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

The alarm blared in his ears, a reminder that the day he dreaded had begun. With a groan, he rolled over, slamming his tail on the alarm clock to shut it up. Staring at the wall, Impulse contemplated his life. Why did he have to go to school? 

Sitting up, he blinked the sleep out of his eyes as reality began to hit. Attempting to distract himself from the growing anxiety in his stomach, he slid out of bed and stumbled to the bathroom to brush his teeth. After splashing hot water onto his face, he could feel his brain beginning to wake up. 

Walking back into his room to get changed, his eyes brushed over the alarm clock that read 7:54 am. 

7:54?! 

Impulse immediately picked up the pace, getting dressed and eating breakfast in a matter of minutes before sprinting out the door for the 8:00 bus. Impulse could see people boarding in the distance as he desperately ran for the bus, making it just as the doors were about to close. 

Plopping into a seat, Impulse shut his eyes and leaned back in an attempt to catch his breath. A terrible start to a day he already dreaded. He pulled his headphones on and looked out the window as the bus zoomed along the road. 

He blinked, and suddenly, his school was looming in front of him. Did he fall asleep? Anxiety built in his chest, and he wondered if the other people on the bus noticed. The door opened, and Impulse hopped out, facing a giant brick building with the school logo plastered in the centre. He was not excited. His tail curled around his ankle, digging into his skin as he put his head down and walked towards the main doors.

Fighting his way through the hall between sweaty, loud bodies did nothing except overwhelm him, as he tried desperately to find his calculus class. Rainbow-coloured, feathery wings appeared from nowhere, knocking into Impulse as he navigated the crowd. “Sorry!” A voice shouted as Impulse continued to wriggle his way around. His face reddened at the thought of what he must look like: a small, skinny teenage boy with horns and tail, practically running to a class that didn’t start for fifteen minutes. 

Impulse turned his head to see who he crashed into, and a boy with sandy hair and glasses stared at him strangely before turning to whisper to his friends, who whipped their heads around. One of them, a gangly, black-haired boy with pale skin, smiled at him while the other, a boy of medium height with brown hair and a scar on his nose, waved. 

Impulse turned away, embarrassed that his clumsiness had been noticed. Marching on, his classroom appeared in front of him, a haven from the overstimulation of the school corridor. He swung the door open, elated to discover the empty classroom. He sat down at a desk in the middle of the room, the prime location for going unnoticed. Not so close to the front that he seemed like a nerd, and not so close to the back that he seemed lazy. Impulse felt his heart rate returning to normal, the pit in his stomach dissipating. 

He had always felt more at peace when he was alone, especially after a stressful event. Impulse had always hated school; being surrounded by loud people while simultaneously having to cope with his anxiety and do his work felt like too much. But the first days of school were especially awful; the noise and chaos seemed to be amplified tenfold. Not to mention that today was his last first day, which somehow made the noise even louder as his peers cried over their childhood coming to an end. But not Impulse. He was excited to escape this place. 

Impulse was jolted out of his thoughts by the sound of the door opening - it was his teacher. Impulse sighed internally as he saw his calculus teacher, Mr Masu, notorious for being one of the worst teachers in the school. The man did not teach anything, he would just put equations on the board. And he assigned boatloads of homework. This was not going to be a good year.

Time ticked on, and more students began to trickle into class as the time neared 8:30. The chatter began to overwhelm Impulse, and he escaped into his mind, visualising random colours and shapes to prevent him from having a panic attack. He didn’t even notice the two of the guys from earlier walk into class, shooting Impulse a half smile that he didn’t reciprocate. Or the sneeze Mr. Masu let out that rocked the whole classroom, causing giggles from the other students. 

The final thing Impulse didn’t notice was the student who walked in late. He had dark hair and piercing blue eyes, with huge white wings sprouting from his back. He didn’t notice the suit he was wearing, with sleeves torn off to reveal his muscular arms. He also didn’t notice that the angel cast his eyes over the whole room before landing on Impulse and beelining towards the desk next to his. 

The only thing that snapped Impulse out of his borderline catatonic state was hearing his name being announced from the front of the class. His heart began to beat a mile a minute as the teacher stared expectantly around the classroom. What did he do? How was he in trouble on the first day? 

Mr Masu said his name again, and Impulse realised he was simply calling for attendance. “Here,” Impulse replied meekly, turning beet-red as other students turned around to look at him. How had he already embarrassed himself on the first day? Impulse thought to himself, putting his head down as Mr Masu talked about the course outline. 

Halfway through the lesson, Mr Masu had already assigned them a worksheet, despite not having taught anything. Impulse had his head down, focusing on decoding the problems he had in front of him. Luckily, math had always come easily to him, so he was doing quite well. 

However, the loud sighs and grumbles coming from beside him indicated that someone else was not faring so well. Impulse turned to his left to see a guy with dark curls staring blankly at the paper, chewing on the end of his pencil as if he were trying to focus. His wings twitched slightly, drawing Impulse’s attention to how neatly preened they were. He was cute. No, he was pretty . 

As if on cue, the guy whipped his head up to see Impulse staring straight at him. The guy grinned at him, then gestured wildly towards the worksheet. 

Embarrassed that his staring had been noticed, Impulse looked back towards his paper. Through Impulse’s peripheral vision, he could still see the guy looking at him, which only worsened his embarrassment. Impulse put his head back down, trying to concentrate on the calculus problems despite feeling the angel’s stare burning into his mind. 

Several minutes later, Impulse had finished the worksheet. Glancing over his answers, he decided to give in and return the worksheet to Mr Masu, despite everyone else still working quietly.

 Attempting to get up as silently as possible, Impulse walked over to the front desk and placed the paper down. As he turned around to go back to his seat, Impulse noticed the array of empty desks around the room. His eyes flitted back over to the angel at the desk next to him, frustration visible on his face. 

Why is he sitting next to me?

 Impulse’s heart began to race yet again. Impulse returned to his seat, trying desperately to focus on anything except the guy next to him. He didn’t need to draw any more attention to himself than he already had this morning.

The bell rang for the end of class, and Impulse immediately popped out of his seat and headed to the door. Stuck behind other students who had made it to the door first, Impulse eagerly awaited his escape. 

“Hey Man!” A voice called from behind him, and Impulse whipped his head around to see the angel looking at him while waving.

“Uh…hi?” Impulse replied nervously, fiddling with his earring while avoiding eye contact with the angel.

“I just wanted to introduce myself, the names Skizz!” The angel gave Impulse that goofy grin again, tilting his head slightly. 

“Oh…I’m Impulse,” Impulse said cautiously. Despite Skizz somewhat resembling Scooby Doo with the way his head was tilted, Impulse still found himself questioning what Skizz’s motives were for talking to him. 

As if he recognised Impulse’s apprehension, Skizz reduced his wide grin to a friendly smile. “I saw you when I walked in and thought all your piercings were super sick. And I didn’t know anyone, so I figured I may as well talk to someone new,” His wings shuddered slightly.“I hope that’s okay with you?”

Impulse was shocked at how friendly Skizz was. In the three years he had been at this high school and the many years of knowing some of the other students from grade school, no one had ever paid this much attention to him. “Oh, that’s nice of you to say, and yeah sure it’s fine,” he responded, hoping his pause wasn’t too noticeable.

“Okay, that’s great! See you around, homie!” Skizz chirped before picking up his bag and walking out of class, leaving Impulse there to contemplate what just happened to him. 

Impulse turned around to watch Skizz walk out of class, wings bouncing as though he had a pep in his step. Impulse followed after Skizz vanished from sight, trying to make sure it didn’t look like he was following him. As Skizz strolled straight down the hallway, Impulse took a left, heading to his physics class. 

The rest of the day passed by in a blur for Impulse as he went over his short interaction with Skizz over and over again. Impulse nitpicked everything he had done, wishing that he could be less awkward. As Impulse headed to his final class of the day, he questioned where Skizz had come from. Impulse didn’t recall seeing him around in previous years, he would recognise those pristine white wings anywhere. 

He swung open the door to his computer class, which he actually wasn’t dreading. Impulse’s passion for computers and the demands of the class, which meant silent work most of the time, were the perfect combination for Impulse. He was one of the last to arrive, so he slid into a seat near the front of the class to avoid attracting attention.

“Hi Impulse!” A voice called from his left, and he turned to see Pearl sitting next to him.

“Hi Pearl!” Impulse smiled back. Pearl was his only sort of friend at this school, even though they only really spoke in class.

“What have you been up to today, mate?” Pearl inquired, Australian accent making an appearance. She had moved from Australia a few years ago, causing a weird mishmash of Australian and American accents.

“Just trying to survive all my classes, what about you?”

“Same same, it’s been pretty boring,” Pearl laughed.

Impulse contemplated mentioning Skizz on the off chance that Pearl knew more about him, but what if Skizz wasn’t new and Impulse just seemed like a jerk? Curiosity was gnawing at him, though, and he decided to go for it.

“I did meet a new student today though, he said his name was Skizz. Know anything?” Impulse sucked all his air in, praying he wasn’t about to be shot down.

“Oh yeah, I met him too! Really nice guy from what I could tell.”

Impulse breathed a sigh of relief before replying. “Yeah, he’s very friendly.”

Their conversation was cut short by the teacher calling for attention, and their heads whipped towards the front of the class. At least now Impulse knew that Skizz was a new kid. An interesting new kid.

The rest of the class passed in a flash as Impulse concentrated on the concepts being taught to him. The bell ringing for the end of the day snapped him out of his daze, hopping out of his seat and waving goodbye to Pearl before leaving class.

 Impulse strolled to the bus stop outside his school and sat down as he waited for the bus to arrive. He suddenly got the urge to look up, and saw Skizz driving away in a beat-up Toyota, with a small, brown-haired boy wearing a moss hoodie in the passenger seat. Impulse wracked his brain for the small boy's name, before remembering it was Bdubs. How Skizz had managed to make so many friends on his first day, Impulse couldn’t understand. As the bus pulled in, Impulse put his headphones on, letting the rock music fill his ears as he boarded the bus.

…

Impulse threw his schoolbag on his bedroom floor before leaping onto his bed and staring straight at the ceiling. Feeling a buzz in his pocket, he pulled his phone out to see Zedaph had texted him. Impulse had known Zedaph for years, albeit only through Discord. Regardless, Zedaph was the closest thing Impulse had to a best friend.

Zedaph: Heya Impulse! How was the first day of school?

Impulse: hi zed, it went well

Zedaph: Glad to hear it man!

Zedaph: Anything interesting happen today?

Impulse: actually yeah, this guy sat next to me in my calc class and spoke to me

Zedaph: Oh Void, Impulse, please tell me you replied to him and didn’t close off like you do

Impulse: oh shut it, yes i talked to him

Impulse: he was rlly nice actually… i’ve never met someone so friendly before

Zedaph: Awww someone’s got a crush! What’s his name, loverboy?

Impulse: i hate you so much

Impulse: and his name is skizz

Zedaph: Cute! Can’t wait for you to introduce him as your boyfriend in a few months!

Impulse: you are so close to being blocked

Zedaph: You wouldn’t!

Impulse: yeah i wouldn’t

Impulse: anyway i have soooooooooo much homework to do, ttyl hopefully

Zedaph: ON THE FIRST DAY??!!

Impulse: yes. shoot me.

Zedaph: Ok, talk to you later Impulse!

Impulse: bye bye

Shutting his phone off and lugging himself over to his desk, Impulse opened his calculus workbook and began working on the problems. But all he could focus on were Zed’s comments. 

Did it really seem like Impulse had a crush on Skizz? If Zedaph thought that through the screen, what did it seem like in person? Impulse did not like Skizz. Well, that wasn’t true; the guy was lovely. But romantically, there was nothing there. Nothing at all. 

Moving back to his calculus questions, Impulse focused on those for several minutes before cringing at how he had acted around Skizz earlier. So awkward and weird. Impulse hoped that wouldn’t affect how Skizz perceived him. Of course, this could all have been avoided if Skizz had just ignored him like everyone else did. It was always easier that way. But that didn’t stop Impulse from acknowledging the warm feeling in his stomach that came from someone genuinely noticing him.

Chapter Text

Impulse shoved the classroom door open, a yawn escaping his lips. Maybe he did regret playing Phasmophobia with Zed until three am last night.

 His stomach dropped when he saw that the majority of his class were already sitting down, including Skizz. The angel waved at him and smiled as Impulse ducked his head down and headed to his seat. As Impulse slumped in his chair, he turned to wave to Skizz so he didn’t seem rude. Skizz opened his mouth to say something, before promptly closing it as Mr. Masu came through the door. 

“Hand over your homework as I come by,” Mr Masu commanded as he weaved his way through the tables. 

Impulse handed his sheet over, fully complete albeit a bit messy. He glanced to his left and winced as he saw Skizz’s half-empty sheet, with minimal work under each problem. Mr Masu shot Skizz a glare before moving on. Impulse felt a tap on his shoulder and whipped around to see Skizz looking at him, a smile creeping on his face. Impulse reddened, unsure of what he had done to deserve this attention. 

“You think he likes me?” Skizz chuckled, wings twitching with glee.

Impulse couldn’t help but laugh, before resetting his face as Mr Masu smacked his ruler against the blackboard. “Silence, everyone!” He yelled before turning around to write something on the blackboard. Why Mr Masu had a blackboard in the twenty-first century, Impulse didn’t understand. It made the most awful noise, and the feeling of the chalk did nothing except overstimulate. Impulse was snapped out of his train of thought as he registered the words on the board.

GROUP PROJECT.

Oh no.

On the second day of school, Impulse was already facing his biggest fear. 

Dread filled his entire body, and he felt his heart begin to beat faster. Sweat built in his armpits as he listened to Mr Masu announce the groups, registering nothing except his own name and the ones that followed.

“Impulse, Skizz, Grian, and Scar.”

Impulse saw Skizz get up and move to the back of the class, before abruptly following. Skizz planted himself next to a sandy-haired boy with glasses and huge rainbow wings sprouting in a similar fashion to Skizz. 

Wait. Is that? Oh Void. 

Impulse felt his brain freeze up, realising this was the boy he had so embarrassingly crashed into yesterday. And the boy next to him with a scar across his nose was the one who had waved. There is no way this day could get any worse.

Tucking his wings in as he settled into the seat, Skizz introduced himself to the other two. 

“Hi Guys, I’m Skizz,” He exclaimed excitedly.

“I’m Grian,” The parrot hybrid answered, voice remaining monotone despite the cheeriness he was met with.

“My name's Scar,” The scarred brunette chirped, tipping his cap to Skizz and Impulse.

“Huh, I wonder why you’re named that,” Skizz replied sarcastically, a smile creeping across his face to indicate that he was joking.

“Well, if you must know, my Mom and Dad took one look at this big scar on my nose when I was born, and decided to name me as such! Seems pretty obvious to me.” Scar replied honestly.

“Dude,” Grian retorted, “He was kidding.”

“Oh.”

Skizz dissolved into helpless giggles as Scar buried his face in his hands. Grian just shook his head, but Impulse still noticed the grin on his face. 

“Dude, you’re an actual gem,” Skizz wheezed, wiping the tears from his eyes. 

“Aw, thanks,” Scar replied, attempting to hide his embarrassment. He turned his head to Impulse, looking at him expectantly.

Impulse’s brain clicked into place, realising Scar and Grian had no idea who he was. 

“Oh, I’m Impulse,” he blurted out, the words blending to make an incoherent mess.

“Say what?” Grian raised an eyebrow, looking Impulse up and down.

Impulse’s face reddened, and he looked away from Grian, accidentally locking eyes with Skizz, who smiled encouragingly.

“My name is Impulse.” He tried again, more confidence behind his words.

“Well, it’s nice to meet you! Your shirt is cool!” Scar grinned at him.

“Thanks,” Impulse replied quietly.

A musing look appeared on Grian’s face before he asked, “So what is this, new guys stick together or something?”

Impulse didn’t quite register his words until he heard an enthusiastic “Yes!” from Skizz. Impulse’s heart rate quickened as he realised he would have to explain that he had been at school with them since freshman year. Except for Skizz, of course.

“Well, that isn’t entirely true…” Impulse said meekly.

“Wait, what?” Skizz said, the shock written all over his face.

Grian and Scar also turned, with an indescribable feeling present on Grian’s face. Guilt maybe? Whereas Scar just looked baffled.

“I’ve gone to this school since freshman year.” 

“Oh.” Scar winced.

Skizz just looked at him, an uncertainty on his face that Impulse didn’t know was possible

“Dude I am so sorry.” Grian apologised profusely. “I have been in a terrible mood this morning, and I was so judgmental, and now I find out that you’ve been here all along, and I wasn’t paying enough attention? I am so sorry, genuinely.”

Impulse had never seen someone so guilt-ridden in his life. He couldn’t help but feel bad for Grian, it wasn’t his fault the day had bit him in the ass before it even hit nine am. “It’s okay, don’t worry about it.”

“Yeah, man, we all have our moments. Don’t beat yourself up too much!” Skizz smiled comfortingly at Grian, whose wings were drooping.

Their kind words got a small smile out of Grian, who looked up at them, face still ridden with guilt.

“Okay, everyone, pay attention! I need to tell you about your project!” All their eyes snapped to the front of the class, where their teacher was staring menacingly at them. “So, you’re all going to work together to create…” 

Impulse zoned out, letting that interaction consume him. Why did he say he wasn’t new? Why didn’t he just accept it? Why does he keep drawing attention to himself this year? He continued to obsess over it for the rest of the class, acknowledging zero words his teacher said. He only snapped out of it when the bell rang for the end of class.

…

Hours later, Impulse was still ruminating over calculus class this morning. He couldn’t believe how embarrassing that was for him. Lying flat on his back, he stared at the ceiling, allowing colours and shapes to form as he zoned out.

Anxiety began to overtake him, his heart beating faster and faster to the point where he could barely breathe. Digging his claws into his skin, he attempted to bring himself back to reality before he got any worse. A burst of pain spread through his arm, and he looked down to see blood pricking at his skin. With a sigh, he got out of bed and slapped a plaster on it. There was a reason he tried to keep his claws short, but the anxiety he had been feeling about school starting had crippled his ability to keep himself groomed.

This self-deprecation was embarrassing, Impulse decided. He was going to do something productive to keep himself busy. He just didn’t know what yet. Ambling downstairs, he searched for something to keep his brain occupied. His eyes passed over the room before landing on his dog curled up in the corner of the lounge.

“Wanna go for a walk, Primmers?” Impulse chirped.

Prim immediately arose from her slumber, trotting over to Impulse and sitting down in front of him, head cocked to the side. Impulse grabbed the leash from the kitchen counter and attached it to Prim’s collar. She barked excitedly as Impulse pulled the door open and stepped outside. 

Walking down the street, Impulse basked in the hot air, whereas Prim was panting loudly. While he did feel bad for Prim, Impulse was grateful he lived in such a hot place. As a demon hybrid, he thrived on the warmth. It made him feel way more comfortable in a world where he already felt out of place. 

He felt a tug on the lead and turned around to see Prim squatting in some grass. With a sigh, Impulse pulled a bag out of his pocket and knelt to pick up her droppings. He glanced up and saw a silhouette of wings in the distance. Was it Skizz? No, don't be silly , Impulse thought. Not everyone with wings is Skizz.

As Impulse kept walking, he realised he was moving towards the winged silhouette. The outline became clearer, the figure was tall, with dark curly hair and huge, feathery white wings.

 Wait. It was Skizz. He was walking with a much shorter figure, who also had dark curly hair, but brown skin instead of Skizz’s tan. Bdubs, Impulse deduced. He was much too close to them to turn around now, he would just have to face them. Marching on, the distance between the three closed until Impulse could hear Skizz calling out to him.

“Hey buddy!”

Sucking all his air in, Impulse braced himself for another dreadful interaction.

“Hi, Skizz.”

Skizz came up to Impulse and threw his arm around him, which made Impulse flinch harshly. Skizz pulled back immediately, an apologetic look on his face that said more than words could. 

“Impulse, have you met Bdubs before?” Skizz pivoted, gesturing to the short boy standing there, tapping his foot somewhat impatiently as a dog tugged on the lead.

“No, I don’t think so.” Impulse half-smiled at Bdubs and waved.

Bdubs waved back, a huge grin engulfing his face. He was promptly launched forward as the dog attached to the lead leapt towards Prim, barking madly. Prim responded by barking back, leaping playfully at the brown dog.

“Woah, Kevin, calm down, man!” Skizz lurched towards his dog, grabbing the leash and yanking him away from Prim, who barked in objection. 

“Just leave them be, they both seem pretty harmless,” Impulse chuckled, letting Prim roam back towards Kevin. 

“Yeah, they’re just playin’,” Bdubs said enthusiastically. Impulse had never heard him speak before; he sounded like a cartoon character.

Skizz just laughed, watching the dogs jump on each other and yap at the top of their lungs. 

Impulse worked up the courage to ask a question, despite his fear of being judged for not knowing the answer. “So, how do you two know each other? I’ve seen you together a lot, and it’s only Skizz’s second day at school?”

“Oh, we’re cousins, dude! I’m surprised I haven’t already told you,” Skizz replied, looking up from the dogs to stare at Impulse with those piercing blue eyes.

“Yeah, he left out the part where he broke into my house and refused to leave. Getting kinda awkward now I’m not gonna lie,” Bdubs quipped, a mischievous glint in his huge dark eyes.

“Shut up! You know you love me!” Skizz fired back.

Impulse just laughed at their banter, it reminded him of his own brother. Despite wanting to spend more time with these two, Impulse felt like he was intruding a little. “Anyway, nice to see you guys, I’m gonna head off now.”

“Wait, wait, wait, do you live in this neighbourhood?” Skizz blurted, an apprehensive look on his face.

“Uh, yeah? Why?”

“Walk with us! We both need to walk the dogs anyway!” Skizz had a slightly pleading look on his face, and Impulse couldn’t quite pinpoint why.

“Yeah, man! Come around with us to keep the beasts happy!” Bdubs gestured towards the two dogs, still running circles around each other.

Impulse contemplated for a moment before deciding it would be rude to walk away now. “Okay, let's go then.”

“Yay!” Skizz tugged on Kevin’s leash, trying to pull him away from Prim so they could get walking. The three settled into a comfortable silence before Bdubs started yapping about some guy. 

“Yeah, Etho and I have been trying to decide what songs to do for a while, but we can’t seem to agree on anything.”

“Hey man, I’ve given you all my suggestions and you keep turning them down!” Skizz shoved Bdubs playfully, and Impulse laughed at how riled up the shorter boy got.

“Well, I just want Etho to be happy with whatever we do!” Bdubs argued back.

“Well, what about Tango? Have you listened to his input?”

“No, Etho’s the picky one.”

“Void, every time I talk to you it’s like Etho this Etho that, just make out already, why don’t you!”

Bdubs screeched to a halt, staring at Skizz with confusion in his eyes. “What are you talking about?”

“Don’t act dumb, Bdubs, everyone and their mother can tell you guys are in love.” 

Bdubs considered this for a moment before shaking his head rapidly. “He doesn’t like me like that. I don’t like him like that. There is nothing there!”

Impulse and Skizz both stared at him, seeing a small tear pool in the corner of his eye. In an attempt to move on before Bdubs started crying (he really would not know how to handle that), Impulse blurted out, “So what are you guys on about? With song choice and stuff?”

Skizz froze for a moment before replying somewhat enthusiastically, “We’re in a band, bro!” BEST Band!”

Bdubs shot Impulse a grateful look before adding, “Yeah! I’m the singer, Etho plays keyboard, Tango plays the guitar and Skizz drums. Of course, we’re not good enough to have original songs and stuff, but we do some good covers!”

“Wait, that’s super cool!” Impulse was surprised - no one at their school had ever thought of starting a band before. It might give him the chance to do some audio stuff for them, since doing it alone was a bit boring. But he would self-insert later. If he had the guts.

“Thanks, dude! If you have any song recommendations, please send them through. We’ve got nothing currently,” Skizz smiled, and kept walking forward, despite Kevin tugging on the lead.

All three of them kept walking before Bdubs interjected with a question. “Skizz?”

“Yeah, buddy?”

“Do you know what’s happening between Tango and that blonde guy? He won’t tell me or Etho, and we’re losing our minds.”

“BRO, don’t even get me started! He’s such a wuss dude. He will not introduce himself even though he’s been pining over that guy since LAST YEAR!”

Skizz dissolved into giggles, while Bdubs raged at Skizz for knowing what was happening instead of him. “Dude, I’ve known him longer than you. Why doesn’t he tell me this??!!!”

“I doubt it’s personal; he probably just thinks the new guy won’t know who he’s talking about. That being said, we need to set them up somehow. I’m losing my mind here!”

Impulse just laughed, somehow comforted by their absurdity. They kept walking, Impulse listening to Skizz and Bdubs back and forth about the most trivial things. Before he knew it, they had made a full circuit around the neighbourhood and were back at Impulse’s front door. 

“Oh, this is me, guys.”

Skizz and Bdubs looked up from their heated debate about pineapple on pizza, a slightly dejected look on their faces. “Oh, see you around, buddy!” Skizz said, waving like a maniac.

“Yeah, nice to meet you, Impulse!” Bdubs added, a wide grin engulfing his face yet again.

Impulse smiled at both of them before pushing the door open, much to Prim’s dismay. As he shut the door, he saw Skizz and Bdubs walking off, still arguing with each other. A warm feeling overtook him, and he couldn’t quite pinpoint the source. As he removed Prim’s leash and headed upstairs, he felt himself crack a genuine smile. Maybe it was nice to be noticed.

Chapter Text

“Guys, what’s an integral?” Skizz casually continued preening his wings, oblivious to everyone's stupor.

“Sorry?” Grian exclaimed, a combination of befuddlement and horror on his face, his own wings twitching violently.

“An integral, what is it?” Skizz looked up, recoiling a little at the looks on everyone’s faces.

“Dude, have you taken calculus before?!” Grian was borderline yelling, aghast at Skizz’s ineptitude. 

Impulse just laughed, thinking back to a class Grian missed where he and Scar had to teach Skizz what a derivative was. 

“Man, I don’t know! I didn’t pay much attention in class last year!” Skizz just buried his head in his hands and sighed.

“Yeah, clearly, this is tragic, dude.” Grian crossed his arms and leaned back. Impulse has learned that Grian, while snarky, was an extremely caring person who just loved to poke the bear.

“Come on, man!” Skizz looked up, conceding this argument. “You could at least explain this to me!”

“Okay, Skizzy, an integral is a way to find the area…” Impulse zoned out at Scar’s explanation, instead locking onto Skizz’s inquisitive look. Much like Grian’s outward snarkiness being a facade for his kindness, Scar appeared dumb and slow on the outside, but had a way of explaining complicated things that made them make sense to anyone. 

Scar continued to ramble on, while Impulse kept watching Skizz, capturing the exact moment the lightbulb turned on. “Oh, I get it now! Thank you, dude!” Skizz clapped Scar on the back before turning to Impulse and grinning wildly. 

Impulse turned away, still not confident enough to lock eyes with the angel. 

“I’m glad you get it now, buddy,” Grian chuckled, before burying his head in his notebook.

“What’s wrong, buddy?” Skizz asked, cocking his head to the side.

“This is such a stupid assignment!” Grian lifted his head, frustration prevalent on his face. “I’m glad to be hanging out with you guys, but I hate this project so much!” 

Scar pulled Grian in for a hug, and Impulse watched as Grian’s stress physically lifted from his shoulders. Grian nuzzled his head into Scar’s neck, closing his eyes as a small smile crept across his face. Impulse had no idea if Grian and Scar were dating, but that didn’t change the fact that the two clearly found comfort with each other. 

“Come on, guys, we can do this! It isn’t due until Friday, and we only have one section left!” Skizz attempted to cheer Grian up, getting a half smile as a reward.

Grian sat up, picking up his pen and taking notes vigorously. “This project will not defeat me!” He declared.

“That’s the spirit!” Scar affirmed, turning back to his computer to continue the research. 

They had been working on this project for about a week now, having to dedicate most of their time after school to get it done. 

While Scar did research and Grian took notes, Impulse and Skizz were tasked with applying their research to the context and creating a report for it. Given that Skizz had little calculus knowledge, he had been doing most of the report writing. Averaging about three hours of work after school each day, they had all been getting very fidgety and agitated. 

Watching all of them work silently, Impulse thought about what a nice group of people they were. Despite all the bickering, they seemed to genuinely enjoy each other's company beyond schoolwork-related matters.

“Do you guys need anything else?”

The whole table jumped at the sound of another voice. Impulse looked up to see a pink-haired girl with a bright blue shirt staring down at them, notepad at the ready. She looked vaguely familiar, but Impulse couldn’t quite place where she was from.

“Oh hey! I’ll get a caramel latte, please!” Skizz smiled at the waitress as she scribbled down his order.

“Double chocolate chip frappe for me!” Scar chirped.

“I’ll have an iced chai, thanks.” Grian turned to Impulse expectantly, as did the waitress. Shit, Impulse forgot that he would have to order something.

“Just an americano for me,” Impulse stuttered out, breathing a sigh of relief as the girl nodded and walked away.

“Guys, she looked kinda familiar, does she go to our school?” Scar asked. Impulse was just glad that he didn’t have to ask himself.

“Yeah, her name’s Lizzie, she’s in my English class,” Grian said before adding, “She’s been in a relationship with the same guy since seventh grade. It’s genuinely impressive.”

“Woah! That’s crazy, man.” Skizz replied, mouth agape.

“Oh, I know who you’re talking about! Her boyfriend’s name is Joel or something, right?” Scar added on.

“Yeah! Don’t know much about him but apparently the guy has got a huge ego,” Grian remarked.

“Oh that’s a bit weird-” Scar was cut off by Grian nudging him as Lizzie came back with their drinks. She placed them down and walked away, with no signs that she had overheard what they were saying.

Scar immediately ripped the straw open and began slurping his drink loudly, much to Grian’s disgust. 

“I do not understand how you enjoy that thing. I can feel the cavities from here,” Grian commented, sipping at his drink quietly.

“Do you hate fun or something?” Scar quipped, continuing to guzzle the frappe.

Impulse and Skizz just laughed. They had become used to the bantering between Scar and Grian, knowing that nothing but love was behind their words. Impulse downed his drink in one gulp before turning back to the task sheet and trying to weave the research into the context on his laptop.

“What, are you immune to the temperature or something?!”

Impulse turned to see Skizz staring at him, mouth agape. “What do you mean?” 

“Dude, I tried to drink my coffee and I almost died! It’s so hot, how did you just down that thing?” Skizz rambled, gesturing wildly towards the empty cup and the unharmed Impulse.

“Bro, look at me! You think the demon tail and horns are a costume or something?” Impulse immediately clapped his hands over his mouth, shocked at how abrasive he had been. Surely Skizz wouldn’t want to hang out with him now.

Instead, Skizz just doubled over with laughter, barely breathing through his giggles. It infected Grian and Scar as well, who began chortling in synchronisation with each other. Their joyous reactions to Impulse’s joke put him at ease, and he allowed himself to laugh along with them.

“Dude, I think we’ve been studying for way too long, my brain is so fried.” Skizz attempted to compose himself. “Don’t worry about it, man, it was a really stupid question on my behalf.” 

Grian was still trying to stifle his giggles but managed to choke out, “Time to go home for the day, I think. We’re not gonna get anything done in this state.”

“Agreed, man, time to leave. I’m gonna be seeing equations in my sleep if we keep this up.” Skizz began to pack up all his stuff, shoving it carelessly into his bag.

Impulse followed suit, picking up his laptop and his books and neatly arranging them into his backpack. Looking up, he saw that Grian and Scar had somehow already packed up and were paying their bill. 

“Bye, Guys!” Scar waved at them from the door, walking out arm in arm with Grian.

Impulse walked up to the counter, and the pink-haired waitress followed suit. She punched his total into the machine, which he tapped. Turning around, he saw that Skizz was still at the table, fiddling around on his phone. “Bye, Skizz!” Impulse called, before walking away without waiting for a response. Despite feeling tired, Impulse had the urge to poke around some of the shops before he walked home. 

Music blasting in his ears, he walked down the road to the music store. While Impulse usually had a pit of anxiety in his stomach, music helped liberate him from the unease. He theorised that it was because he would play the drums with his older brother, who would simultaneously make stupid jokes to try and throw Impulse off track. Those were some of the best memories from his childhood, the only times he ever felt at ease. The music store approached, instruments displayed in the windows to entice customers.

Swinging the door open, Impulse took it all in. Despite the many displays and brands of instruments, Impulse could never feel overstimulated in this place. He took in the woody smell of the shop, before beelining towards the drums. If anything felt natural in the world to Impulse, it was playing the drums. 

Weaving his way through the various drum sets, Impulse dreamed about owning a brand-new set. While he loved his one, he had gotten it from a garage sale several years ago as a present, and it was starting to wear out. Moving on, Impulse drifted towards the audio section. In his free time, he loved to tinker with different gadgets and test them out, imagining a universe where he dared to show off his talents.

“Impulse?”

Impulse whipped around, heart immediately racing a million miles a minute. Skizz was staring back at him, wings rigid with surprise. Impulse could feel his throat close up, unsure of what to say to Skizz despite this being a completely normal situation.

“Fancy seeing you here!” Impulse cringed, unsure why he chose to say that set of words.

Skizz seemed to reset, his relaxed demeanor returning to his body.

“Yeah, wasn’t expecting that.” A look of panic washed over Skizz’s face momentarily. “Sorry, that seems like I’m being rude. I just mean that I had no idea you were interested in music, bud!”

Impulse remembered that despite all the talk about Skizz’s band a few days prior, he had never mentioned his own interest in music and audio.

“Yeah, I love to listen to different types of music and fiddle around with audio stuff as well!” Impulse could feel his tail whipping around behind him; talking about his interests tended to do that. He was just concerned about looking like an overexcited dog.

Skizz smiled at Impulse’s animated response. “I’m more interested in the music element, technology has never really been my thing.”

“Dude I love it! Trying to fix up old tech is one of my favourite things to do. Along with actually using it, of course.” Impulse could feel himself getting more excited - he didn’t usually have the opportunity to talk about his passions.

“That's cool, Impy!” 

Impulse flinched a bit at the nickname; no one had ever given him a nickname before.

Not missing a beat, Skizz attempted to backtrack. “Sorry, I tend to nickname people. Are you comfortable with it?”

Impulse’s heart sank; he hadn’t meant to make Skizz think his feelings were hurt. “No man, I’m all good with it! Just haven’t been given a nickname before is all.”

Skizz’s goofy grin replaced his anxious look. “I’m glad we’re buddies then! You aren’t ready, bro.”

“Oh, I’m sure”, Impulse retorted, smiling equally as big. “Anyway, what are you doing here? If technology isn’t your thing, that is.”

“Oh, we need to figure out some tech stuff for the band, and I drew the short straw.” Skizz laughed, running his hand through his hair. “They’re gonna regret it, that’s for sure.”

“Well, I can help you out! What are you looking for?” 

“Honestly, I’m not too sure, We just need speakers, amplifiers, a microphone, and some cables. Not gonna lie though, I am clueless on brands.” Skizz just sighed, clearly disappointed in his lack of knowledge.

“Well, that’s okay!” Impulse smiled encouragingly at Skizz, who smiled back gratefully. “They’re quite pricey, but QSC has good stuff, and Yamaha is good if you’re on a budget. They’re mainly for speakers and amplifiers, though. For microphones, you would want a Shure SM58, you won’t find anything better.”

Impulse paused, seeing Skizz look at him as though he was musing about something. Before he could ask what was up, Skizz asked, “Impy, how much tech stuff do you have around? Since you fiddle with it and stuff ya’ know.”

Unsure where this was going, Impulse replied cautiously, “Yeah, I’ve collected stuff over and years, and my family buys me stuff for my birthdays. Why?”

“Do you want to be a part of the band?” Skizz blurted out in a nervous fashion that was very unlike him.

Impulse paused for a moment, unsure what he meant by ‘part of.’

“Sorry, that was very incoherent.” Skizz collected himself before continuing, “We need to sort out tech stuff if we want to perform, and I am utterly useless. But you seem to know what you’re doing, so it would be a huge help if you could be our tech guy?”

Impulse thought back to a few days prior when he was going to self-insert into BEST band. All he had ever wanted was a cool band to hang out with and do the tech stuff for, and maybe even drum a bit if he got the chance. But being in this band would mean meeting new people and having to get up on stage if that was their goal. The thought of being perceived like that filled him with dread. But Skizz was such a nice guy, surely it wouldn’t hurt to try it out?

In all his ruminating, Impulse forgot that Skizz was still standing there. Looking up, he saw deep blue eyes and a kind expression looking back at him. It struck a chord in Impulse’s soul, filling him with a warmth that was unfamiliar to him. For some reason, the thought of letting Skizz down felt like disappointing a puppy who just wanted to play.

“Okay, I’ll do it,” Impulse answered tentatively.

The goofy grin that Impulse enjoyed so much reappeared, with Skizz doing a little jump to accompany it. “Yay! I’m excited, man! Do you wanna meet the rest of the guys this Friday during practice?”

Impulse felt his heart racing; the thought of new people so soon stressed him out. But he knew it would go fine. Right? 

“Yeah, that’s okay.” 

“Sick! I’m gonna head home now, but I’ll see you in class, Impy!” Skizz waved goodbye and headed towards the door.

Impulse waited for him to leave the store before breathing a huge sigh of relief. Despite his plan to fly under the radar this whole school year, Skizz somehow kept on bringing him out of seclusion. 

Feeling his nerves start to build, and seeing there was no one else in the store, Impulse sat down at a set of drums and began to play. He let muscle memory do the work for him, playing along to a beat he had invented himself. As he played, he imagined an alternate universe where he dared to show off his skills in a room full of people, without anxiety and unease consuming him. Hitting the cymbals in a cathartic finish, Impulse felt his worries and concerns leave his body. 

Walking out of the store and into the crisp evening breeze, Impulse felt less stressed about meeting the rest of the band. This was his opportunity to do something he had always wanted to, and he wasn’t going to let his mind stop him from doing it.

Chapter Text

After much slaving, a few tears, and complete loss of their sanity, the project was done. Impulse was not exaggerating when he said they were so elated to have finished. Skizz may or may not have screamed, “Yeah Baby!” at the top of his lungs in the middle of the cafe. While the patrons didn’t appreciate it, Impulse sure did, doubling over with laughter at Skizz’s display of joy.

But now they had to hand it in, facing Mr Masu’s stern look as they all stood in front of him mere minutes before the deadline, Scar meekly holding out the printed report. Despite Mr Masu having it out for them due to the ruckus they tended to cause, he had no real reason to reject their assignment, and they all knew it.

“Go sit down, boys.” Mr Masu waved them away, putting his glasses on to examine their paper more thoroughly.

The four scurried to their seats, fist-bumping and high-fiving each other along the way. Impulse was grateful that Mr Masu didn’t lecture them in front of the whole class - he wasn’t sure he could handle that this early in the morning.

“Dudes, my life has suddenly gotten so much better.” Grian fiddled with a feather in his wings as Skizz sniggered.

“Life is great when we’re not slaving over calculus projects!” Scar sang, busying himself by also fiddling with Grian’s wing.

Hearing huffing from the front of the class, the group turned to see Mr Masu tapping his foot impatiently as he scowled at them.

“Yikes,” Grian whispered, just loud enough to cause the other three to dissolve into giggles.

“Quiet down, boys!” Mr Masu shouted, steam practically blasting from his ears.

Other students in the class turned to look at the group, judgemental looks on their faces. 

This was enough to snap Impulse out of his giggling fit, anxiety causing his tail to whip back and forth as Mr Masu also grew more annoyed. He didn’t understand how some kids dealt with causing a ruckus constantly - one mild outburst from him and he was practically riddled with fear at how he was being perceived.

“Okay, calm it, guys.”

Impulse turned to his right to see Skizz motioning to Grian and Scar to settle down, who promptly followed suit. Did Skizz notice how anxious he was? Did he do that for him? Impulse kept looking at Skizz, expecting some kind of acknowledgement, but none came. Maybe he was being delusional. Impulse turned to the front, where Mr Masu continued with the lesson.

…

Mr Masu was clearly in a terrible mood, whether it be because of Impulse and his friend’s shenanigans or just because life bit him in the ass that day. Regardless, it was clear from the worksheet he assigned them for the lesson that he was taking it out on the class. While Impulse was still stressing over being told off earlier, Mr Masu had yelled at about three other students in the class for simply whispering. So, maybe Impulse wasn’t an awful student after all. Head buried deep in the worksheet, Impulse barely noticed Skizz sliding a note across his desk until the paper poked his hand. Picking it up, Impulse read the scrawl:

H EY IMPY, STILL ALL GOOD TO MEET THE GUYS AFTER SCHOOL?

Impulse had been somewhat dreading this since Skizz had asked him on Monday. While he was happy at the prospect of being in a band, his hermit-like tendencies for the past three years of high school meant he had zero clue what Etho or Tango were like. And there were many things Impulse disliked, but uncertainties topped the list for sure. Despite the stress Impulse was feeling, he knew that this would be worth it. Hopefully.

Picking up his pen, Impulse wrote “yeah” on the paper before sliding it back to Skizz, who accepted it like a kid who found candy.

Expecting no response, Impulse went back to his worksheet, but his focus only lasted a few seconds before Skizz tapped him with his pencil. Looking at Skizz, Impulse saw a cheesy grin on the angel’s face, accompanied by a smiley face on the paper. Impulse blushed slightly, finding the happiness on Skizz’s face adorable. 

However, Skizz’s smile instantly dropped, and he put his head back down to finish the work. Impulse’s heart sank, but he also felt eyes boring into his soul. Turning to the front of the class, Impulse was met with a death stare from Mr Masu. Impulse decided that he should probably do some work if this was the treatment he was getting, and turned back to his half-completed worksheet. Impulse was so focused, he didn’t even notice that Skizz was watching him intermittently, wings fluttering slightly each time he looked at Impulse.

…

“Hey, Impulse!”

Walking into computer class, Impulse’s tail swished slightly at the mention of his name. He saw Pearl perched in her seat, waving excitedly at him.

“Hey Pearl! Where have you been?” Impulse smiled at her as he slid into his seat, slamming his backpack on the floor. 

“Dude, I had the worst food poisoning ever.” Pearl’s shoulders sagged slightly. “My stupid friend gave me these cookies he made, but he didn’t check the expiry date on the milk, and it was like, two weeks old! Last time I let him bake for me,” Pearl rolled her eyes fondly. It was clear that she still adored the friend in question.

“That sucks Pearl, I’m sorry,” Impulse gave her a sympathetic look. “If it makes you feel any better, I’ve been very lonely here for the past week.”

“Aw, dude.” Pearl patted him on the shoulder. “Anyway, what else is new with you?”

Impulse struggled to think of something interesting to say. For the most part, all he did was schoolwork and play Phasmophobia with Zed. But he was going to hang out with the BEST band after school, which was somewhat riveting.

“Oh, I’ve become the tech guy for Skizz’s band, so I’m going to meet all of them after school. Except I already know him and Bdubs, so I guess it’s just Tango and Etho.”

Pearl perked up, excitement etched across her face. “BEST band, right!! They asked me to be in their performance if they do one since I’m friends with Tango and Etho.”

Impulse felt the unease in his stomach settle at the prospect of Pearl potentially being at practices. “That’s awesome! Hopefully, we get to practice together at some point.” Impulse decided to push his luck and get a read on Tango and Etho. “So, how do you know Tango and Etho?”

“Oh, we’ve been friends since we were little kids, although we drifted a bit in middle school.” A mischievous look crossed Pearl’s face, and she smirked before continuing. “We’ve been planning since last year to start up a mail service this year, so people can send anonymous notes to each other in case there’s something they want to get off their chest before we all graduate.”

Impulse made a mental note of that service - it could be useful at some point. “Oh, you’re cheeky, aren’t you?” he quipped, grinning at her to ensure his jesting was clear.

“We just appreciate some controlled chaos,” Pearl winked, falling quiet as their teacher came through the door.

As their teacher rambled about some Python-related nonsense, Impulse considered what Pearl had told him. While she was one of the nicest people he knew, creating a service that was bound to cause destruction like that was slightly insane. And also kind of impressive. Impulse knew that while that system could be abused, it was perfect for someone like him who hated confessing things face to face. Maybe he would make use of it later, if he happened to have something important to say that he couldn’t work up the courage for. Or he could just watch the rumours run wild through his grade. That could be fun too.

…

Hearing the bell ring for the end of the day, Impulse felt his stomach drop. He had spent the whole day stressing out over this, and now he had to go and do it. Walking towards the music block, Impulse felt his stomach cry out for food. Maybe he did regret skipping lunch.

 In the distance, he saw a white haired boy wearing a navy blue jumpsuit and green vest step into the music room, followed by a boy with fire for hair and a grey and red outfit enter behind him. A blaze hybrid, Impulse figured. The door approached faster than Impulse liked, and suddenly the handle loomed in front of him, waiting to be twisted. With a deep breath, Impulse summoned every shred of courage in his body and pushed the door open.

Impulse immediately felt intimidated as the four of them whipped their heads around to look at him. 

“Hey buddy!” Skizz called out, coming over to drag Impulse towards the rest of the guys.

“What’s up, baby!” Bdubs also shouted, Impulse seeing his gleaming grin despite the shorter boy being on the other side of the room.

Skizz summoned the other two guys over with a smile. “Tango, Etho, this is Impulse. Or Impy, as I like to call him.” Skizz went to pat Impulse on the shoulder, before retracting his hand and instead pointing towards the blaze hybrid, who Impulse could see had red-tinted glasses on and a smile showing pointed teeth. “This is Tango, Top for short.”

“Don’t ask how I got that name, dude,” Tango chuckled, reaching out to fistbump Impulse.

“Dude! Don’t make it weird!” Skizz cried, a shocked but entertained look on his face.

“Hey, Tango,” Impulse said amusedly, returning the fistbump.

Skizz then gestured towards the other guy, the white haired one who hadn’t made a peep the whole time. “This is Etho!” Impulse waved hello, and got a small wave back. Due to Etho wearing a face mask, Impulse couldn’t read whether he was happy to be meeting him or not. 

Bdubs ambled over, red bandanna practically slipping down his face from sweat. “Am I imagining things, or is it hot in here?” He panted as he mopped his brow.

“No,” Tango and Impulse chorus simultaneously, sharing a look of surprise and then understanding.

“Nice to know we’ve got something in common,” Tango grinned at Impulse. 

Even though Impulse was typically cautious around new people, he felt completely at ease around Tango. Etho, on the other hand, was worrying him. Impulse wasn’t a fan of social interactions already, but not being able to see facial expressions made it hard to tell what Etho actually thought of him.

“Come on, Bdubs, I’ll get you some water.” Etho slung his arm around Bdubs and walked him out of the room, much to the shorter boy’s glee.

As the door closed, Skizz turned to Impulse as if he could tell what was making him uneasy. “Don’t worry about Etho; he’s extremely quiet around all of us except Bdubs. Bit of a wet-cat for him in my opinion.”

“Yeah, he has nothing against you, trust me,” Tango gave Impulse a sympathetic smile. “Just wait until you hear his crazy laugh. You won’t think he’s so mysterious then, I promise.”

Any worries or concerns Impulse was feeling simply melted away. Despite only knowing these two for a very short time, he already felt completely at ease. Never in his life had he felt so seen or heard without saying anything at all. Except for when he was with his brother, of course.

Hearing animated chatter from outside the room, Impulse turned his head to see Etho and Bdubs come back in, much cheerier than before. He shot a smile towards the pair, getting a wide grin from Bdubs in response. Etho also crinkled his eyes slightly, a sign that maybe he was smiling under the mask.

“So, what do you guys want me to do?” Impulse aimed his question at all four of them, hoping for some sort of response.

“We need you to help us noobs set up all the tech,” Skizz laughed. “Tango’s actually somewhat competent, but he excels more in programming and developing than audio stuff.”

“Shut up Skizz, I suck at developing!”

“Dude, you literally made a full dungeon running video game.”

“That’s not that impressive!”

“WE ARE SEVENTEEN YEARS OLD.”

Tango playfully slapped Skizz on the arm, which was promptly fired back at him. Impulse watched in amusement as the two slapped each other, their arms shrunk down to the size of T-Rex’s. 

“Children, please!” Bdubs hollered, jumping out of a hug with Etho to separate the two. 

“We’re just goofin’,” Skizz said, slinging his arm around Tango.

“Nah, I hate him.”

“HEY!”

Bdubs rolled his eyes before turning back to Impulse. “C’mon, I’ll show you what tech stuff we got. Skizz also said you have some of your own gear, right?”

Impulse couldn’t help but find this group weirdly endearing. One second, they were slapping each other to oblivion, and the next, they were hugging and paying each other compliments. Following Bdubs into the backroom, he was faced with tangles of cables and janky, old audio equipment.

“How old is this stuff?” He exclaimed.

“Not from this century, clearly,” Bdubs looked at the equipment with distaste.

“Well, if we want to see what is usable, we need the other three to get back here and help us untangle this.” Impulse added, hoping Bdubs would do that job for him.

“Boys!” Bdubs’ booming voice echoed in the small room, and the other three appeared in the doorway.

“Need help getting this stuff out.”

The three boys sighed, trudging in and looking for a way to unloop the cables. 

Impulse and Bdubs smiled at each other as the other three complained.

“You gonna get your ass in the war?” Skizz sassed, grabbing Impulse by the hand and pulling him in.

Bdubs reluctantly joined in as well, whining even more than the others.

The next two hours passed by in a flash, with lots of heaving and pushing and puzzling at how to untangle the cables. Amidst this, the group bantered with each other, albeit Impulse mostly watched as he couldn’t keep up with their quips. Before he knew it, all the equipment was laid out on the floor of the music room, ready for Impulse to inspect and sort.

“Hey guys, it’s nearly six pm, let’s just go home for the day. We can come back on Monday to figure this out.” Skizz proposed, followed by nods all around.

“See ya, guys!” Bdubs called, walking out the door with Etho in tow.

“Bye Impulse!” Tango hollered, completely ignoring Skizz as he left the room.

“You suck!” Skizz yelled back.

Impulse slung his bag over his shoulder, heading towards the door.

“Hey, Impy, wait a minute would ya’?”

Impulse stopped in his tracks, waiting for Skizz to catch up. The angel shuffled towards him, wings fluttering slightly. Skizz’s deep blue eyes stared into Impulse’s dark brown, as though he was searching for something.

“Are you okay? Y’know, with all this? Meeting everyone and stuff.” Skizz’s soft look triggered something in Impulse, the urge to be honest instead of burying his feelings deep down.

“I’m gonna be honest, I was anxious at first. Like, on the verge of throwing up.” Impulse took a deep breath before continuing. “But you guys are all so chill, and it was nice to just listen to you guys banter and stuff, y’know? I don’t know where I’m going with this, but thanks for making me feel normal and forget about my stress for a bit.”

Skizz’s expression said all the words that he didn’t have to say himself. “That’s good, Impy, I’m glad.” Skizz looked as though he wanted to say more, but something stopped him. “I’ll see you  on Monday, yeah?”

“Yeah, see you then,” Impulse replied, walking out of the room. Stepping into the cool breeze, he wrapped his jacket around himself tightly as he walked home. Despite the cold getting to him, he still felt warm inside.

…

Swinging his bedroom door open, Impulse basked in the warmth of his bedroom. Feeling a faint vibration in his back pocket, he pulled his phone out to see that Zed had texted him.

Zed: Hi Impulse! 

Impulse: hi zed

Impulse: how have u been

Zed: I’m doing well! Kinda made a small explosion in the lab today, but it was non-fatal! What about you?

Impulse: void you are special

Impulse: im fine

Impulse: joined a band lol

Zed: That’s awesome dude! I know you’ve always wanted to do that! Who’s in the band?

Impulse: skizz, and these three other guys called bdubs, tango, and etho

Zed: Aw, did your Skizz invite you?

Impulse: ur the worst

Impulse: and yes he did

Zed: Isn’t he just the sweetest? ;)

Impulse: blocking u fr this time

Zed: You love me!

Impulse: whatever helps u sleep at night

Zed: In other news, the concoction on my desk is overflowing, so I’m gonna bounce! Have a good night Impulse!

Impulse: bye zed

Rolling his eyes with fondness, Impulse flopped onto his bed. Prim cocked her head, surprised at the sudden movement. Patting her head, Impulse couldn’t help the small smile tugging at the corners of his mouth.

Chapter Text

1. Find the derivative of f(x) = (x^3 * sin(x)) / (e^(2x) * ln(x+1)).

Scribbling working under the problem, Impulse felt confident as he circled the answer. Moving on, Impulse saw that the next question was even easier. Despite the questions being objectively difficult due to Mr Masu’s sadistic nature, calculus had always come easily to him. His critical thinking and problem-solving skills had always benefited him in math classes. 

Hearing a huff from beside him, Impulse could see that not everyone was faring so well. Peeking a glance at Skizz, he could see him slumped over the test, wings sagging to the floor. Impulse winced at the way his white feathers lay on the dirty carpet.

Looking in the other direction, he saw that Scar was crushing it, working on one of the last problems on the paper. Grian appeared to be powering through, about halfway down the page. Returning to his test, Impulse raced through the rest of the questions, complete confidence in every answer he selected.

While he waited for class to finish, Impulse watched Skizz out of the corner of his eye. He saw Skizz write for a few seconds, then put the pencil down and stare at the paper despondently. This process was repeated a few times, Skizz’s despair worsening each time.

Impulse felt awful for the guy. Impulse knew he was lucky to be blessed with a brain that could process calculus, he couldn’t imagine his life without it. Unfortunately, his brain was not wired to provide comfort. He could not fathom a singular sentence that would make Skizz feel better about his plight.

Impulse saw that Scar had also finished and was lightly drumming on the table to keep himself occupied. He wasn’t surprised that Scar had finished; he was so proficient he was able to teach the concepts to both Grian and Skizz - a duo that was basically the web definition of distracted.

Suddenly, a lightbulb turned on. Impulse knew that while he struggled with words, he did not struggle with calculus. Maybe, he would be able to tutor Skizz, since it would be no different than writing down the work for problems. It could even help him understand it better.

Looking back at Skizz, he could see that the angel was no better off than he was a couple of minutes prior. Impulse could help him, he just had to work up the courage to ask. The bell rang for the end of class, and Impulse leaned over, opening his mouth to speak.

But Skizz promptly got up and tossed his paper onto the front desk and walked out the door without a peep.

Any courage that Impulse had was stripped away. Despite Skizz clearly having had a terrible time, Impulse had never known him to outright ignore anyone. He picked up his bag, feeling tears pricking at his eyes.

“Did Skizzy have a bad time?”

Impulse blinked hard to stop himself from crying, before turning to see Scar’s sympathetic expression. “Yeah, he looked like he was struggling quite a lot during the test”

“That sucks dude. It was extremely difficult,” Grian chimed in, brows furrowed slightly.

“He’ll be okay, I think. I’m sure he didn’t mean to ignore you, Impulse,” Scar reassured, giving Impulse a small smile.

“Yeah, I’m sure it’s fine. See you guys later.” Impulse gave a weak smile in response before walking out the door.

Rationally, Impulse knew that Skizz didn’t mean it. But that didn’t stop the little goblin in his head from reminding Impulse that he was unimportant, and Skizz didn’t care about him. Pulling his headphones on, Impulse blasted rock music as he walked to his next class, doing his best to drown out the waves of negativity penetrating his brain.

…

By lunch, Impulse was still feeling upset about being ignored this morning. Despite the gnawing hunger in his stomach, he wasn’t sure he could handle the overstimulation of the cafeteria today. Turning up his music, he headed towards the library instead.

As he pushed open the library door, Impulse saw rainbow, feathery wings and sandy blond hair facing away from him. Grian. Despite the two talking a lot during class now, Impulse could not handle the awkwardness of going up to him when he hadn’t been invited. 

Facing him, he could see a pale girl with a mass of red curls and dark brown antlers deep in conversation with Grian. Yeah, no, thank you. Although the girl seemed nice enough, Impulse had no clue who she was and did not feel like meeting a new person today.

However, curiosity got the best of him, and he swerved around, ending up on the other side of the bookshelf from them. Sitting down, he decided that he would just eavesdrop on their conversation. They couldn’t see him, and it was much easier than participating anyway.

“-so dumb, Grian! I am losing my mind here!” The girl cried, frustration clear in her voice.

“Hey, she’s still my sister! But yeah, she’s totally oblivious.”

“I literally flirt with her in art all the time and get nothing back. I’m not even being subtle anymore!”

Weird, Impulse had no idea Grian had a sister at this school.

“Look, I’ve been her stepbrother for a few years now, and she’s always been like this. Scar had a phase in sophmore year where he had a crush on her, and every time he flirted, there was no response. She was either really dumb or just did not care for him.”

That would explain it. Impulse was in his own head most of the time, but he thought he would have remembered if Grian had a twin.

“But what if she doesn’t care for me, Grian?! She’s so pretty and so kind, I don’t think I could handle it.”

“Sorry Gem, should have been clearer. She definitely likes you, all I hear at home is your name.”

“Really?”

“I promise you, I will go home today, and all I’ll hear from Pearl is ‘Gem is great, Gem is great!’”

Wait, Pearl ?! Pearl and Grian were siblings?! Impulse felt like he didn’t know anyone anymore. Maybe he did spend too much time by himself.

“That’s true, I am great. But why doesn’t she flirt back?!”

“Gem, in the kindest way possible, you can be kinda mean when you flirt sometimes. She probably thinks you don’t like her.”

“Um, I am taking offence, Sir!”

“It’s true! But she’s also oblivious so that’s not helping your case.”

“Okay, this is making me sad. But if we’re gonna talk about oblivion, can we talk about Jimmy?!”

“Don’t get me started, Tim is making me lose my mind.”

“He needs to make a move before I slaughter him. If I hear about this hallway crush one more time, I’m ending it.”

“Who even is it? All I hear from Tim is how cute this guy is, but he will not divulge any information.”

“Some blaze hybrid, I think his name is Tango or something.”

The gears in Impulse’s brain grinded into place as he realised they were talking about Tango’s hallway crush that Bdubs had mentioned the first time they met. Maybe Impulse should come to the library more often.

“Ohhhh, he’s the one that made the dungeon game, right?”

“Yeah, I forgot the name. Decked out or something. It was super cool.”

“Yeah, he’s a genius. Anyway, Tim is annoying me, and I’m about to make them meet accidentally on purpose.”

“Please let me get in on that.”

“You got it.”

Silence fell between the pair, save for the occasional clicking of a pen. Impulse wasn’t sure what to do with himself; he had never received so much gossip in his life. However, he was too scared to meddle. It could get back to Grian and Gem that he was eavesdropping, and then they would hate him.

Rummaging in his bag, Impulse fished out a granola bar to stop the hunger pangs. Chewing on the bar, he mindlessly scrolled through some video reels on his communicator to pass the time. He settled into the armchair, letting the voice of some British guy in a green outfit and helmet ranting about metal music and redstone fill his headphones. 

…

After the disaster that was this morning’s calculus lesson, Impulse was dreading band practice after school. Recently, his anxiety hadn’t been affecting him as much as usual, which he attributed to feeling comfortable around the band and the other people he talked to. But he could feel the unease returning, nerves wreaking havoc on his stomach.

Inhaling deeply, Impulse tried to prevent himself from having a panic attack. Thinking about practice later wasn’t helping him. He should focus on making it through computer class instead.

Pushing the door open, he was relieved to see that the class was empty so far. Wrapping his tail around his leg, he squeezed tightly, using the pain to bring him back to reality.

He felt his heart rate decrease slightly, a welcome change from the past ten minutes. He allowed himself to shed a tear, so they didn’t build up and explode in the middle of class. Now that would be embarrassing.

The door swung open, making Impulse jump out of his skin. A tall figure came into view, wearing blue jeans and black hood with some brown hair poking out the sides. Pearl. 

“Hey Pearl!” Impulse called, trying desperately to sound normal.

All he got in response was a small wave as she sat down at the desk next to him in silence.

The only thing stopping Impulse from having a freak-out at the amount of silent treatment he was getting today was the tears slowly rolling down Pearl’s cheek. Despite not even knowing how to regulate his emotions, Impulse felt compelled to ask Pearl what the problem was.

Impulse decided to settle on “Do you want to talk about it?” Hoping that didn’t feel too pushy.

Pearl turned to him, tears staining her cheeks. Weirdly, she reminded Impulse of Prim, with huge eyes and a downturned face that reminded him of the day he found Prim abandoned at the dog park. 

“The girl I’ve had a crush on for years doesn’t like me.” She choked out, rubbing her eyes to stop the tears from falling.

Impulse didn’t know what to do. He knew that Gem liked Pearl back, and it felt like now would be a good time to meddle just to ease Pearl’s worries. But he couldn’t shake the paranoia that it would get back to Gem and Grian, and they would hate him for being nosy.

“That can’t be true, you’re so lovable, Pearl!” Impulse cringed at his own words, instantly recognising how useless they were.

She smiled at him and took a deep breath. “It’s not just that, to be honest. I’ve just struggled with my sexuality for so long, and over the summer, I finally came out to my friend group and accepted that I’ve had a crush on Gem for a long time now. Even though we only started speaking this year.”

Impulse just nodded his head, knowing the feeling all too well. He had similar issues coming to terms with being gay, but having supportive parents and no friends to potentially let down made it much easier.

“I’ve been trying to talk to her and get to know her better, but she just keeps bullying me and calling me pathetic, and I don’t know what to do, Impulse!” She buried her head in her hands.

“At risk of sounding like a sexist adult, what if she’s just doing it because she has a crush on you?” Impulse decided that this would be his way of comforting her, although it did make him sound like a total douche.

“I don’t think so man, it's constant mocking.”

“She could just be like that, I’ve heard from Etho that she bullies him too, but they’re super close.” A lie, but Etho had mentioned Gem before, so Impulse figured it would be fine.

“Maybe, I’m losing hope, though.” Pearl sniffled, no more tears rolling down her face. “Sorry to go all lovesick teenage girl on you.”

“Don’t worry about it, Pearl, talk to me anytime.”

A comfortable silence fell between the pair as students began to stream into the classroom. Settling into their work, Impulse felt sympathy wash over him on Pearl’s behalf. It wasn’t her fault that Gem got mean when she flirted. 

He allowed himself to get lost in his computer program, projecting his anxieties about band practice onto his coding. He combed through it, ensuring every character was in the correct place. Before he knew it, the bell was ringing for the end of the day, and Impulse found himself walking towards the music room.

He saw Skizz in the distance, laughing loudly with Bdubs as they strolled into the room. 

Quite the contrast to his earlier demeanour. 

Impulse pushed the door open, breathing slowly to stabilise his heart rate. The four of them turned to look at him, and Impulse felt his tail curling itself around his ankle, cutting off his circulation.

“Hey, Impy!” Skizz called, waving enthusiastically from his drum set.

Impulse’s brain short-circuited as he felt himself wave back. So he was just going to act like nothing happened? Did Impulse overthink this? Did Skizz actually want to be his friend?

“Hey, Impulse, come here, bro!” Tango beckoned him over into his corner, cluttered with electric guitar equipment.

Impulse shuffled over slowly, anxious about what Tango wanted. He thought back to what he overheard earlier from Grian and Gem, and his anxiety worsened further. What if Tango wanted to talk about his crush? Impulse wouldn’t be able to lie.

“I need your help connecting all this stuff up, if you don’t mind.” Tango was borderline shouting, and Impulse winced, the raspy voice assaulting his ears slightly.

“Yeah, sure, dude.” Impulse gave an internal sigh of relief before examining the equipment, connecting it all like a jigsaw. The others worked on their instruments, tuning and refining them with much precision.

“Psst.” 

Impulse looked up, seeing the blaze hybrid peering down at him.

“What’s up?” Impulse stuttered slightly, unsure why his nerves had to be tested for the millionth time today.

“Skizz knows that he hurt your feelings earlier. He was in a bad headspace, and the test kinda put him over the edge. He didn’t mean to ignore you.”

Impulse breathed a huge sigh of relief, outwardly this time. The rational part in his brain knew that, but the goblin in his head was convinced otherwise. 

“That’s good, I’m glad.” Impulse smiled gratefully at Tango, who just shrugged his shoulders in response.

“I’m just the messenger, bro.” Tango moved back to his guitar, tuning it yet again.

…

Rain smashed down onto the roof of the music room, drowning out their music and their ability to stay in time.

“Forget this guys, let’s just go home!” Bdubs screamed, already unplugging and packing up his gear.

“Good plan!” Tango yelled back, dragging his equipment into the cupboard and slamming the door. He yanked his hood over his head and sprinted out the door without so much as a goodbye.

“What’s his rush? Rain’s not going anywhere,” Bdubs questioned, raising his eyebrow.

“He goes bald when rain touches his hair.” Etho didn’t hesitate to throw Tango under the bus.

Skizz threw his head back, roaring with laughter. Bdubs and Impulse chuckled at Skizz’s amusement, even getting a snigger out of Etho.

“Gonna go yank his hood off, be right back.” Bdubs left the room with a laugh, Etho not far behind.

Impulse instantly felt awkward; he wasn’t ready to be left alone with Skizz after how anxious he had been just an hour earlier.

Skizz didn’t seem to notice, slinging his bag over his shoulder. Impulse followed suit, halfway to the door before Skizz’s voice stopped him in his tracks.

“Woah, how are you getting home, man?”

“The bus. The bus stop is only a 5 minute walk.”

“In this weather? You’ll be soaked.” Skizz had a look of genuine concern on his face. “Let me give you a ride, Impy.”

Impulse hated accepting favours from people. He always felt obliged to give something back, but obviously, he wouldn’t be able to drive Skizz around with no car. He had a point, though. Impulse would be dripping wet by the time he got home.

“It’s okay to accept help, dude.” Skizz was right. He knew that Impulse was going to be stubborn about this.

“Okay, let’s go before the rain gets worse.” Impulse walked out of the room, not waiting for Skizz to follow.

He heard the lock click behind him and turned around to see Skizz jogging to keep up.

They walked through the hallways in silence before reaching the exit door, both of them pausing to look at the torrential rain they were about to run into.

“Better now than never!” Skizz sprinted out the door, tripping slightly as the ground slipped beneath his feet.

Impulse followed, holding his hood over his face to stop water from dripping into his eyes.

The two of them ran desperately to Skizz’s car, parked all the way on the other side of the lot. Impulse yanked the door open and flung himself inside, trying to escape the flood that was occurring outside. He shook his head like a dog, watching water fly across the inside of the windscreen.

Skizz was having similar issues, wings creating a puddle on the edges of his seat. He grinned at Impulse, a look of triumph on his face. “That was like a 100-yard dash, bro. Imagine if you had walked for 5 minutes.”

Impulse just huffed, not in the mood to be proven wrong today. Skizz’s smile dropped slightly, and he turned away. Impulse felt the car sputter to life as Skizz drove them out of school.

Impulse could cut the tension in the car with a knife. He was embarrassed that he had spiraled over something so trivial. But he was also wondering if Skizz was going to say something to back up Tango’s claims. But Skizz was just driving in silence, save for the occasional flutter of his wings.

They neared Impulse’s house, and boy, was he desperate to escape this weird tension that had been suffocating him. But Impulse also couldn’t live like this forever. He wanted to talk to Skizz, he wanted them to be normal again.

Skizz pulled over, turning the car off and looking at Impulse expectantly. But Impulse knew he couldn’t just get out of the car. He had to explain himself somehow.

“Hey Skizz, can I-”

“Impy, I need to-”

They both paused, looking at each other’s shocked faces before bursting into laughter. Impulse felt tears pricking at his eyes again, although this time they were of joy.

“Dude, I’m sorry I ignored you earlier, I really didn’t mean to.” Skizz was still smiling, but his words had a more serious tone to them.

“Don’t sweat it, Skizz, Tango told me you were having a rough time.”

“Yeah, that stupid test just pushed me over the edge. I am sorry I didn’t notice you, though; that was rude. What did you want to ask me anyway?”

Impulse took a deep breath, trying to say this next sentence without sounding patronising. “Do you want me to tutor you? Since I’ve noticed you’re struggling quite a lot and I want to help you but I don’t want you to think I’m undermining you so it’s okay if you don't want to like I would understand-.”

“Woah, breathe dude.” Skizz tentatively put his hand on Impulse’s shoulder, trying to calm him down. Impulse slowed his breathing, allowing Skizz’s touch to ground him in reality.

“First of all, yes, please, dude. I am awful at calculus, I need all the help I can get. Secondly, telling me that you think I need help does not equate to ‘undermining’ me.” Skizz said all this matter-of-factly, which helped the rational part of Impulse’s brain process this better.

“Okay, that’s good, I was just worried.” Impulse smiled at Skizz, grateful that someone could recognise when he was spinning out.

Impulse opened the door to leave, but Skizz stopped him yet again.

“Oh, one more thing, and I totally understand if you don’t want to.” Skizz gave Impulse a look full of understanding, and Impulse nodded, immediately knowing that whatever it was, the answer was yes.

“I’m hosting a Halloween party at my house, full costume style. Mainly so I can meet some more people. But, I would really like it if you would come.”

Chapter Text

“Zed, do I look okay? I don’t look like a total freak?”

“You do. But it’s Halloween, and everyone looks like a freak!”

“You suck.”

Impulse spun around in front of his mirror, trying to ensure nothing was out of place. His yellow overcoat was made of horrendously itchy material, and Impulse was desperate to dig his claws into his skin and scratch his way to heaven. Not to mention the purple bowtie; he felt like he was being choked to death. 

“Your CandyMan costume is awesome, Impulse!” Zed cheered from the other side of the screen. 

“Are you sure?” Impulse straightened his black top hat, trying to get it at the perfect angle so it didn’t hurt his horns.

“I wouldn’t lie to you!”

While Impulse was glad he had decided to video chat with Zed to validate his costume choice, it didn’t stop the dread and anxiety from consuming him. 

As the date had neared closer and closer throughout the past month, Impulse regretted saying yes more and more. He had never been to a party before; the thought of all those sweaty, moving bodies squeezing into a tight space, coupled with loud music reverberating through a building, had zero appeal to him. He would rather stay in his room and play the drums or talk to Zed.

But for some reason, Impulse found himself unable to say no to Skizz. While it could be attributed to his people-pleasing tendencies, something about Skizz’s huge blue eyes and soft expressions just made him impossible to say no to.

“Thinking about Skizz are ya?” Impulse whipped his head to look at Zed’s cheeky grin on the laptop.

“I don’t like him!” Impulse knew he didn’t sound very convincing.

“Never said that.”

“Why am I your friend.”

Zed just laughed, used to Impulse’s banter. “In all seriousness, your costume looks great, and I’m sure tonight will go fine.”

Impulse smiled gratefully at his friend. Despite Zed being thousands of miles away, it still felt like he was right there next to him. “Thanks, Zed.”

“Of course! Anyway, I have to go study, my chemistry test is in about 4 hours.”

“Bro, go to sleep! I can’t believe you answered my call at 4 am your time!”

“I wasn’t planning on sleeping anyway. Gotta practice for when I’m an actual scientist.”

“You’re so strange.”

“Bye, Impulse!”

“See ya, Zed!”

The soft ding indicated that the call had ended. Impulse sighed, closing the tab. Glimpsing at the time, he saw that it was 8:03 pm. Unfortunately, time to leave.

Impulse scooped up his communicator, shoving it into his coat pocket. Staring at his array of shoes, he chose the chunky black boots and pulled them on at a snail’s pace.

Trudging down the stairs, he saw his parents cuddled up on the couch, fast asleep. Impulse stepped outside, careful to shut the door quietly so his parents wouldn’t wake up.

The cool autumn chill pierced Impulse’s bones, and he shoved his hands into his pockets as he walked briskly towards Skizz’s house. The one and a half mile walk gave Impulse plenty of time to reflect on his life choices.

In the past month, Impulse had been busier than in the past three years of high school. It had come to the point where he wasn’t home until six or seven pm pretty much every day. And yet, he wasn’t completely burnt out somehow.

The band had been practicing about twice a week, rigorously preparing for a show that they weren’t sure they would be invited to. But Bdubs had his heart set on performing at the spring festival, and he wanted all of them to know a variety of songs. Despite none of them understanding why Bdubs was so invested in this, no one had the heart to say no to those huge brown eyes.

Impulse had also been hard at work tutoring Skizz. Unfortunately for both of them, it hadn’t been going super smoothly. Skizz’s inattention during his junior year had drastically affected his ability to understand even the most basic concepts.

They had been spending every free afternoon together so Skizz could understand enough to pass the final. With all the studying they had been doing, maybe he could even scrape a B.

Despite the arduous task of having to teach a clueless man complicated concepts, Impulse thoroughly enjoyed their study sessions. While they were mostly productive, the pair had spent a lot of time talking to each other. From music taste to films to pet peeves to fears, they had grown much closer in the past month. Close enough that Impulse would even consider him a friend, although he wasn’t sure if the feeling was mutual.

Not to mention how stressed Impulse had been about this party. Skizz had added everyone to a group chat, which was anxiety-inducing on its own. Once Impulse saw that eighty-seven people were going, he started feeling faint. 

He was still feeling faint even before checking the map and realising he was a mere five minutes away from Skizz’s house. His heart started beating faster, and he felt the pit in his stomach get larger with every step he took.

While Impulse knew that logically, the party wouldn’t be that awful since everyone in his grade was quite nice, he only knew about seven of the people going. They would also be mingling with other people or their friend groups. Safe to say, he was starting to regret being a recluse for his entire high-school career.

Impulse turned into Skizz’s cul-de-sac, hearing faint music from the opening of the street. Impulse kept walking, and the music increased in volume as he got closer and closer. His tail lashed wildly, matching up with his increasing heart rate. The front door loomed, towering over him. Dark and wooden with a metal handle that felt electric as Impulse turned it, knowing what was waiting for him behind it.

The music amplified tenfold, bass echoing throughout Impulse’s body. Dancing bodies crowded the entrance as Impulse wriggled his way inside, immediately feeling crowded and overwhelmed. Sliding between conversations, he searched for a familiar face amongst the masses. But all he was met with was ghosts, vampires, zombies, and everything in between.

Impulse kept going, searching for a quiet place to sit down. Weaving his way through the labyrinth of rooms and people, he found the kitchen. Sitting down on a bar stool, Impulse took a deep breath, congratulating himself on surviving this place for five minutes.

“Impy?”

He turned his head towards the familiar voice, seeing Skizz look back at him, eyes wide with worry. A police cap sat lopsided across his head, small tufts of black hair poking out the front and side. A fake moustache was plastered across his upper lip, sliding around slightly as Skizz kept speaking. 

“Are you okay?” Skizz moved slightly closer.

“Yeah, it’s just a bit loud out there.” Impulse’s words were a bit shaky and clearly unconvincing to Skizz. The angel slid into a seat next to Impulse, looking at him with deep blue eyes filled with concern.

“Are you sure? I know this isn’t really your scene.” There was no judgment in Skizz’s words, and Impulse felt himself relax.

“Yeah, don’t worry about me.”

“If you’re sure. Nice costume, bro!” Skizz pulled at the bowtie playfully, launching Impulse forward. Slamming his feet into the ground, he looked up at Skizz indignantly. He just shrugged, a smile creeping across his face.

“Oh yeah, what’s your costume meant to be?” Impulse snickered, a similar smile tugging at the corners of his mouth.

“What the?! I’m clearly a police officer!!” 

“Not much of a costume. Is there a character you’re channeling?” Impulse wasn’t typically one to poke fun at people, but Skizz had somehow claimed that spot.

“No, but it stops people from destroying my house!” Skizz scowled slightly, but all he achieved was looking like a slightly cross child.

“Sure, buddy.”

Impulse and Skizz turned to look at the doorway where Gem was standing, arms crossed and a grin on her face. A red bandana was tied around her red curls, which cascaded down, obscuring the brown vest and white blouse she was wearing. Her antlers poked through her curls, dark brown and branching out into slightly arched ends.

“Come on, Gem, get him! I’m getting all this static for nothing!” Skizz pleaded.

“No, Sir, your costume is not very good.” 

“You mind your manners, young lady!”

Gem drew her cutlass from her belt, brandishing it at Skizz with a grin. “I’ll kill you.”

“I believe you. What’s up, Gemmy?” Skizz slung his arm around her and faced her towards Impulse. “This is Impulse, by the way. Be nice to him, please.”

“I’m a lovely person, Skizz! Hi, Impulse!” She waved excitedly at him, and Impulse waved back with a smile. While slightly terrifying, she seemed nice enough. Impulse knew from his eavesdropping that her jokes had a tendency to overstep.

“How’s being the host going?” Gem had a slightly sheepish look on her face.

“It’s great! Everyone is being so nice and respectful, and you’ve come to visit me, which makes it much better!”

“Right.” Gem pulled away from Skizz, avoiding eye contact with him.

“Gem. What’s happened?” Skizz looked worried, as he should have been, given the number of people in his house.

“Uh…”

“Come on, Gem, I’m not gonna be mad at you.”

“Well, Joel kinda threw up into a vase.”

“That’s fine, I can clean that.”

“And then some random people took the vase and ran outside to play catch with it, and it kinda… broke…”

“Come on, man!” Skizz facepalmed while Gem looked at Impulse awkwardly. Skizz looked up, giving Impulse an apologetic look. “I’m sorry, Impy, I gotta go take care of this.”

“Of course, see you later, Skizz.” 

“I’ll be back, promise!” Skizz turned around and followed Gem, who gave Impulse a small wave.

With no one to distract him, the volume of his surroundings seemed to amplify. It reverberated throughout his brain, smashing and banging on the inside of his skull. Impulse felt his throat dry up, desperate for some kind of liquid.

Impulse found himself stumbling towards the lounge, even though it was packed to the brim with partygoers. His eyes locked onto a bowl of punch, and he beelined towards it. Pouring some punch into a plastic cup, he downed it in one gulp. 

Heading back towards the safety of the kitchen, Impulse stopped when he heard his name being called from across the room.

Turning around, he saw Pearl sitting around a table with an unfamiliar group. “Hey, Pearl!” Impulse called back, unsure whether he was being invited to sit with them.

“Come on over, mate!” Pearl grinned at him, her three friends also giving him a friendly wave. 

Impulse walked over cautiously, trying not to knock anyone over. He sat down facing her group, who all looked at him warmly. “How are you, Impulse?” Pearl asked, face slightly flushed from the warmth of the room.

“Good, just trying to make it through the night to be honest.” Impulse fidgeted awkwardly, feeling his tail curl around his ankle.

“Fair enough, it’s a bit chaotic in here.” A blue-haired boy with matching blue eyes and green face paint chimed in, Scottish accent clear in his speech.

“Yeah, and we’ve been spending our time taking care of these drunk idiots!” Pearl looked fondly at the other two. Impulse cast his eyes over a zombie hybrid sporting a mermaid tail, giggling loudly at something the other guy had said. He was wearing a red beanie and black sunglasses, along with a dark blue jumpsuit. Impulse had no idea what his costume was, but he wasn’t going to admit that.

“This is Cleo,” The blue-haired boy gestured to the mermaid. “And BigB,” He pointed at the other guy. “And I’m Scott!” He gestured to himself theatrically, showing off his pointed hat and black gown.

Impulse smiled, seeing that Pearl was in matching attire. “Your guys’ matching costumes are nice.”

“Thanks, mate! Your costume is pretty snazzy, too.” 

Impulse was unsure how to continue the conversation, and based on the awkward silence that somehow filled the noisy room, neither was Pearl. 

“So, how do you know Skizz?” Scott blurted.

Impulse was just grateful someone knew how to interact with people. “He’s in my calculus class, and I’m the tech guy for his band.”

“Oh, that’s awesome! He only knows Pearl, but she managed to convince him to let all of us in.” Scott grinned before looking over confusedly at Cleo and BigB, who were arguing affectionately over some ethical problem.

“Not quite sure why he let them in; they really can’t handle their alcohol.”

Impulse and Pearl sniggered at the pair, who were now slumped backwards, heads lolling in the air. 

“To Skizz’s credit, I barely had to convince him. He was happy enough to just let them in.” 

“Yeah, he’s a really nice guy.” Scott agreed.

“He’s awesome, I love hanging out with him.” Impulse added, smiling brightly.

Pearl and Scott shared a mischievous look, which filled Impulse with dread. It was the kind of look that indicated that he wasn’t in on a joke. Impulse felt his stomach drop, immediately uncomfortable around them. He had to escape.

“I’m gonna go for a walk, guys, see if I can find Skizz or something.” Impulse got up, trying to avoid looking at the perplexed looks on Pearl and Scott’s faces.

“Woah, are you sure? I don’t think you’ll find him amongst all these people.” Pearl looked concerned, guilty even.

“Yeah, see you later.” Impulse turned away from them, walking into the crowd aimlessly.

“I think we messed up, Pearl.” Impulse heard Scott murmur to Pearl, and he felt his stomach twist. Did they dislike him or something? Regardless, he knew he wouldn’t find Skizz in here, he just needed to get away from them. He weaved through the crowd, hot tears blurring his vision.

He collided with something, someone. Impulse felt liquid get dumped all over him and the other person, seeping into his costume. Impulse looked up to see a vampire towering over him, distaste clear in their expression.

“Watch where you’re going, bro!” The vampire barged through, knocking Impulse aside roughly. Impulse felt the tears roll down his face as people’s stares bore into his soul. Whispers floated through the air around him, whispers about him, about his stupidity. 

Impulse’s heart was racing uncontrollably, sweat drenching himself and his costume. Thoughts circled through his brain, driving him further into his panicked state. 

These people don’t like you. They think you’re a freak. What are you doing, crying like this? Pearl and Scott think you’re weird, just like these people. Go clean yourself up, loser. Skizz doesn’t care about you. Everyone is watching you. They know what happened to you. Everyone knows. Everyone knows about how your brother-.

Impulse cut himself off, not allowing his brain to go there. But he felt his breathing quickening, his body unable to calm itself down. He needed fresh air, he needed to get away from the crowd, he needed to get outside.

He raced towards the sliding door, yanking it open. There was no one outside except for a small circle of people passing a joint around. Good. Impulse sank to the ground, head buried in his hands. He could feel the stares burned into his mind, judgments racing around the room.

Impulse felt himself gasping for air, unable to take even half a breath. Digging his claws into the sides of his thighs, he tried desperately to bring himself back to reality. But his gasps only got more desperate as memories raced through his brain.

His hand. The drink. Liquid seeping into his clothes. The look of disgust. Being shoved aside. Whispers. Mocking. His brain was a runaway train, not stopping for anything, not even for a breath. The hallway. Stares. His parents sobbing. Him sobbing. The whispers of his classmates. 

His chest heaved with effort, trying to breathe amidst his brain turning against him. Impulse sobbed, pain and effort and shame racking his body. He was outside by himself, but he could feel people watching. Someone watching.

“Impulse?”

He looked towards the voice, blinking hard so he could focus. He saw the faint silhouette of a short, winged individual, accompanied by two much taller forms. Impulse buried his head into his knees, not wanting these strangers to see him like this.

“Scar, Mumbo, go find Skizz.” A short pause filled the air, barely audible above Impulse’s hyperventilating. “Now!” The voice affirmed.

Impulse felt a gentle hand on his shoulder, and he flinched harshly, turning away from it. He tucked himself into the fetal position, trying to block out any external stimulus. “Impulse, can you take a breath for me?” Impulse locked onto the familiar, faint voice, trying to slow down his breathing. He hiccuped forcefully, feeling bile rise in his throat. 

“Hey, hey, hey, you’re safe, you’re okay, Skizz is coming to get you.” Impulse felt the other person sit down with him, murmuring words of comfort into his ear. The voice sounded like Grian, but he couldn’t tell due to all the noises hacking into his brain.

“Impy, what happened?!” The voice of an angel reached Impulse’s ears, gentle and kind. He felt his body being scooped up, arms tucked around his shoulders, pushing him along while Impulse struggled for breath. 

“Can’t b-breathe,” Impulse choked out, trying to force his feet up the blurred steps in front of him.

“I know, you’ll be safe soon, okay?” Impulse heard Skizz’s soft voice, slightly shaky and filled with distress. Blinking tears out of his eyes, Impulse saw that Grian was on his other side, gently pushing him along.

They walked him to the end of the hallway, and Skizz pushed the door open, revealing his room, and a brown dog sprawled out on the bed. Impulse perked up slightly at the thought of playing with Kevin Bubbles. He felt his breathing settle slightly as he was guided towards the bed. Skizz and Grian set him down gently before walking into the corner of the room to whisper. Impulse hardly noticed, though, allowing Kevin Bubbles to stick his wet nose into his palm.

“Is he gonna be alright up here, Skizz?”

“Yeah, no one’s allowed up here anyway. He can stay here, and I’ll take him home later.”

“Okay, tell him I’m thinking of him, please.”

“Will do, thanks, G.”

Impulse heard the door shut quietly, leaving him and Skizz alone in the room together. Impulse just stroked Kevin Bubbles, watching the dog roll all over Skizz’s bed as he begged for stomach rubs. He felt the bed sink slightly next to him, seeing Skizz’s bare leg nudge his.

“You wanna talk about it, Impy?” 

“Not really.” Impulse didn’t want to talk about it at all. He just wanted to be left alone, unnoticed by everybody. He didn’t want to consider how many people just witnessed his meltdown, how many people are making fun of him right now for being such a baby.

“Are you sure?” Skizz didn’t seem totally convinced.

“Yes, Skizz, please leave me alone.” Impulse turned away impatiently, nuzzling into Kevin’s fur. He heard the defeated sigh, followed by footsteps and the sound of the door opening.

“I’ll take you home later, okay?” Skizz sounded downcast, but Impulse was still too wound

up to reply. The door closed gently, and Impulse was alone. Pulling out his communicator, he opened the clock to see that it was only 9:41 pm. He hadn’t even made it an hour and a half.

Flopping onto his back, Impulse stared at the ceiling, letting random colours and shapes fill his vision. He felt Kevin lie down on his stomach, breathing heavily. Impulse shuddered slightly as he remembered his state just ten minutes prior. His chest ached from the effort it took to breathe; it would hurt tomorrow.

He felt the panic wash back over him, breathing hard and digging his claws into himself to stop from spiralling again. His tail lashed back and forth, drawing the attention of Kevin, who promptly leaped onto the floor and chased it back and forth. Impulse laughed lightly at the dog’s concentration, running back and forth with utmost precision.

Impulse’s worries eased slightly as he watched Kevin run circles around the room, overexcited tail knocking things to the floor. He forgot about everything for a while, letting Kevin capture all of his attention.

Impulse didn’t notice the time flying by, the ruckus caused by all the people in Skizz’s house slowly getting quieter as more people went home. He just sat in the room, playing with Skizz’s dog and thinking about how embarrassing this was. Surely no one would want to talk to him after this. He’s just the kid who had an insane panic attack over being in a room with people. They didn’t know the real reason.

Hearing steps coming back up the stairs, Impulse froze, incapable of handling any more human interaction tonight. The footsteps neared, increasing Impulse’s heart rate. The door swung open, and Skizz stood there, looking at Impulse and then at Kevin rolling around on the floor. 

Skizz smiled, slightly masking his tired expression. “Come on, I’m taking you home, man.”

Impulse didn’t respond; he just grabbed his communicator and walked out the door, leaving Skizz behind. He couldn’t deal with Skizz’s pity, his comforting words that masked how pathetic he found Impulse. Clambering down the stairs, he saw that the house was completely deserted and completely trashed. Cups, streamers, and paper plates littered the floor, combined with mysterious stains and smashed crockery. Turning the corner, Impulse saw a giant section of caved-in wall, plaster crumbs on the carpet. That must have been the loud crash he heard while Kevin was trying to eat his tail.

Skizz had a lot of clean up to do, but here he was, taking baby Impulse home. Impulse felt sick, stomach weighed down by how he was burdening Skizz. Impulse headed towards the door, hearing Skizz slowly walking behind him. He flung it open, immediately shivering from the polar blast that struck him.

He felt Skizz put an arm around him, trying to guide him to the car. Impulse wriggled away, walking ahead. He couldn’t deal with the comfort right now, knowing that he had completely ruined Skizz’s night over his anxiety.

Pulling the door open, Impulse slid into the passenger seat, looking out the window as Skizz put the key into the ignition. The car sputtered to life, and Skizz steered them out of his driveway and onto the moonlit street.

They drove in silence, Impulse spending his time obsessing over his behaviour tonight. He couldn’t believe how badly he ruined not just his night, but Skizz and Grian’s as well. He had made a fun Halloween party about himself and his anxiety. He was a horrible friend.

Skizz pulled over outside Impulse’s house, turning the car off, filling the air with silence. Impulse opened the car door, hoping he could exit without a word. Feeling a hand on his shoulder, he knew he had no such luck.

“Impy, please talk to me, man. Tell me what’s going on.” Skizz sounded distressed, desperate even. But Impulse couldn’t bring himself to admit the truth. Admit the root of his anxiety. Even years later, it still filled him with too much pain to talk about. He couldn’t bring himself to be vulnerable right now, not when he had already ruined Skizz’s night.

Besides, the man was just asking to be polite. Impulse knew that Skizz wouldn’t want anything to do with him after this. Their ‘friendship,’ if he could even call it that, was over. Impulse had ruined it.

“Thanks for the ride, Skizz.”

Impulse slammed the door behind him, letting the tears roll down his cheeks. He looked back once and saw Skizz still staring at him. He looked distraught, large eyes brimming with tears. Impulse couldn’t understand why. Skizz hadn’t done anything wrong. He kept walking towards his front door, but he could still feel Skizz watching him, those blue eyes piercing his soul. For a moment, Impulse was tempted to turn around and run into Skizz’s arms, telling him everything he had hidden away for so long. But he couldn’t. He had ruined everything.

Chapter Text

Impulse disappeared behind his front door, the brief light cast onto the footpath vanishing. He was gone. Skizz let the tears fall, streaming down his face, while his breathing became more rapid. He couldn’t believe how awful the night had gone. He knew that Impulse was going to struggle a bit, but Skizz figured that he would have some fun, maybe even make some friends. Instead, Impulse spent his night curled up into a ball, trying to run from an environment that enclosed and suffocated him. And it was all Skizz’s fault.

Sniffling loudly, Skizz rubbed his face, trying to dry his eyes so he could drive home. With one last hiccup, the tears stopped, and Skizz reversed out of the driveway. But the tear stains lingered, drying out his skin as he drove home, trying to stop more from flowing. 

Pushing the door to his destroyed house open, Skizz couldn’t muster the energy to start cleaning up. Guilt was ravaging him, juggling his organs and piercing his heart. He could physically feel Impulse’s distress, constricting his own breathing and overwhelming his brain. He could feel eyes on him in a room by himself, the temperature increasing, and sweat dripping from his body.

Skizz did love being an angel hybrid, truly. His enhanced empathy for others gave him the ability to forge meaningful connections with so many people. Being able to tap into their brain and tell people exactly what they needed to hear was the most incredible gift in the world. Which is why Skizz felt so distraught at what happened to Impulse. He should have known that Impulse was hating it, that he was feeling overwhelmed and panicked. 

But he was too busy trying to stop people from wrecking his house, and instead, he wrecked the most important friendship he had formed in his life. He could feel the anguish radiating off Impulse, the humiliation of his exposure. Skizz recognised that Impulse struggled with vulnerability, and he was put into a situation where he was unwillingly vulnerable, in a room full of people.

Skizz felt like he was going to throw up. All he had to do was use his blessing to see that Impulse would not enjoy himself at this party, and he couldn’t even do that. Collapsing into his bed, Skizz felt his wings droop from exhaustion and despair. While his halo was only visible when he was extremely happy, he could usually sense it slightly, even when he was a bit upset. Drifting off to sleep, Skizz couldn’t feel his halo at all.

…

Skizz was knackered. Never again would he host half his grade for a Halloween party. While most of the people had been respectful, all it took was one extremely wasted friend group to completely trash his house. The several liquor stains were easy to sort out and had occurred due to multiple clumsy people, and were understandable given how drunk everyone was. But the smashed crockery and full-on hole in his wall were going to be a fun story for his mum. However, he had cleaned everything that could possibly be cleaned and would just have to accept the consequences for the crockery and the wall.

Skizz felt a yawn building up in his stomach, slowly climbing until it released itself through his mouth. He wasn’t sure if he would make it through today without passing out. Pulling open the door to his calculus class, he was pleased to find no one else in there. Slouching at his desk, Skizz blinked hard, trying to keep himself awake. The door swung open, and Grian and Scar walked in, chatting passionately about something.

“People who have monopolies are so power hungry,” Grian had a firm look on his face.

“But it would be so fun! All the trading you could do!” Scar whined like a little kid.

Skizz had no idea what they were ranting about, and quite frankly, he was too tired to care. “Hey, G, Sir Scar!”

They snapped out of their bickering, smiling widely at him. “What’s up, homie buddy!” Grian mocked, sliding into the seat next to him. Skizz groaned. He had said that to Grian once, and now it was all he was greeted with.

“Hi, Skizzy!” Scar smiled from his desk next to Grian. “Thanks for hosting that party on Saturday!”

“It’s all good man, I hope you had fun!”

“We did. Sorry about your house, though.” Grian winced. He had been there when a guy in a vampire costume had shoved someone into the wall, resulting in the huge hole. Grian was the one who went to grab Skizz, who had promptly kicked the guy out.

“It’s just plaster, bro, don’t worry about it. I shouldn’t have invited him anyway, he seemed like a jerk from the start.” Skizz had kicked himself after he examined the hole in the wall; he shouldn’t have let that happen. He could tell from the moment that guy had walked in that he would cause problems, and he still let him stay. If only he knew who was behind the mask.

“Still sucks though.” Grian had an understanding smile on his face, which quickly turned to concern. “Speaking of, do you know how Impulse is?”

Skizz felt his wings tense up, Impulse’s distressed state flooding back to him. “No, I didn’t want to push it. But he didn’t speak to me the entire ride home.”

“Poor Impulse.” Scar had a downcast look on his face, eyes filled with worry.

“Yeah, I know the feeling. It sucks that it hit him in such a crowded space.” Grian’s wings twitched slightly, and his face flushed. Skizz could feel Grian’s own emotions reverberating into him, mirroring Impulse’s distress from Saturday night. He could tell that Grian was speaking from lived experience.

The door slowly creaked open, as though whoever was entering was trying not to make a scene. Their heads snapped up, seeing that it was Impulse who had walked in, as though they had summoned him. Skizz smiled warmly, glad to see that Impulse had come to school today. His eyes locked with Impulse’s, making Skizz’s wings flutter happily, and the tension released from his shoulders.

But as quickly as their gazes locked, Impulse looked down, tail curling around his ankle. He slid into the seat next to Scar, not uttering a word or even a smile. Skizz felt his heart sink. Anxiety radiated off Impulse, amplifying Skizz’s own stress.  He watched as Scar reached out for Impulse’s shoulder, trying to gently coax him into acknowledging him. But Impulse flinched harshly, pulling away from the touch. Skizz saw Impulse turn up the volume on his headphones before putting his head on the desk, surrounding himself with his arms.

Skizz didn’t know what to do. Typically, his enhanced empathy meant he knew exactly what people needed to feel comforted. But no matter how hard he dug, no matter how much of Impulse’s anxiety he let wash over him, he couldn’t find anything that would help him. All he could feel was total despair, and a self-loathing that broke Skizz’s heart.

Looking to Grian and Scar for comfort, he got nothing in return except for a similar worry and hopelessness. The fact that Impulse chose to sit as far away from Skizz as possible wasn’t lost on them either, with Grian gesturing towards the open desk beside Skizz confusedly. He had no response, just letting his wings droop to the floor as he leaned back and stared at the ceiling.

Skizz heard the buzz of the class coming to life, and Mr Masu’s ramblings about concepts he couldn’t care less about. All he could think about was how horrifically he had fucked up. His mind wandered to him and Impulse’s first interaction, how riddled with anxiety Impulse had been.

…

Skizz was somehow late on the first day. He knew it was cliche. But the stress of starting over had kept him awake way into the night, and as a result, he had woken up about fifteen minutes before school was meant to start. Running through the hallways, he sighed with relief as his classroom appeared in front of him. 

Pushing the door open, he was instantly met with a stormy glare from the teacher. Skizz opted to mouth an exaggerated ‘sorry’ before scanning the room for a place to sit down. Despite the array of empty desks, Skizz’s gaze fell onto a demon hybrid, shrunk into himself with eyes that appeared to be glazed over. Skizz noticed his tail was digging into his ankle, and his knee was shaking violently. He could feel the anxiety radiating off the demon, travelling into his brain and making his own heart race.

Skizz’s body made its decision, moving his legs in the direction of the desk next to the demon. Sitting down, he smiled at the demon, but it wasn’t reciprocated. The demon’s unease amplified tenfold in Skizz’s brain, the close proximity making it much worse. He felt bad for the demon, truly. It must be hard being in a new school and not knowing anyone.

“Skizz?” The cranky teacher yelled his name, and Skizz whipped his head to the front. He only just registered that this was the second time his name had been called; he was paying too much attention to the demon.

“Present, sorry sir!” Skizz could tell he was not off to a good start with this teacher. Facing the front, Skizz fought with his brain to stay focused.

An hour later, and that had been a frustrating lesson, to say the least. Skizz was starting to regret missing all of those calculus classes last year, even if he had a good reason. But he could not understand a singular thing that had happened in that class. That wasn’t his concern right now, though; his main goal was to introduce himself to the demon.

Skizz’s enhanced empathy had helped him recognise that this demon was absolutely riddled with anxiety, which didn’t let up the entire lesson. At one point, Skizz felt the demon looking at him while working on that stupid worksheet. He had looked back, shooting the demon a grin and gesturing wildly so he didn’t seem threatening. But the demon had simply looked away, his embarrassment burned into Skizz’s mind.

But Skizz was still interested in this demon. His brown hair that flopped into his face covered an eyebrow piercing, which Skizz had always wanted. Chocolate brown eyes were rimmed with dark circles, and his snub nose was adorned with a silver stud. His oversized black band tee also told Skizz that this demon clearly had great music taste. Bottom line is: Skizz needed to be his friend.

The bell rang for the end of class, and Skizz watched as the demon beelined towards the door, waiting for other students to make their way out. He had to grab his attention before he lost courage.

“Hey, man!” He called, hopefulness racing through him as he waved eagerly.

The demon turned around, looking confusedly at Skizz as if he thought his attention was directed elsewhere. “Uh…hi?” The demon fiddled with his earring, avoiding eye contact with Skizz.

The demon’s anxiety didn’t go unnoticed. Skizz wanted to show him that he wasn’t a threat. Grinning widely, he felt his mouth operating without his brain’s permission. “I just wanted to introduce myself, the names Skizz!”

Skizz watched as the demon froze slightly before cautiously replying, “Oh… I’m Impulse.” His apprehension was clear, eyes darting back and forth across the empty room. Maybe Skizz was coming on too strong.

Reducing the width of his grin, he said, “I saw you when I walked in and thought all your piercings were super sick. And I didn’t know anyone, so I figured I may as well talk to someone new.” Skizz felt his wings shudder slightly, a nervous tick of his. He could still sense second-hand anxiety beaming into his brain, so he added, “I hope that’s okay with you?”

Impulse paused for a moment before replying, “Oh, that’s nice of you to say, and yeah sure it’s fine.”

Happy with his work, Skizz chirped, “Okay, that’s great! See you around, homie!” before bouncing away. As he left the classroom, an indistinguishable feeling washed over him. Although Skizz knew it was from Impulse’s brain, he couldn’t figure out what the feeling was. Shock? Confusion? Skizz couldn’t figure it out. But he could tell that while Impulse was clearly fighting his own battles, he would become a good friend. 

…

Impulse had completely ignored him for the entire class. To be fair, Skizz hadn’t tried very hard to grab his attention. But the dejection and anxiety that radiated off Impulse in violent waves that smashed into Skizz’s brain were enough of a tell. Skizz watched in despair as Impulse leapt out of his seat the second the bell rang, and speed-walked out the door.

Skizz had no idea what he was meant to do, how he was meant to fix things when Impulse ran away the second there was a free moment. Skizz allowed his wings to drag along the floor as he walked out of the classroom, dejectedly navigating to the next. 

“Sup, mate!” A familiar Aussie voice called from behind him, and Skizz felt his wings perk up slightly. 

“Hey, Pearly-Pop!” Skizz pulled her in for a hug, the smile on her face a warm welcome.

“Thanks for hosting on Saturday! I hope the clean-up wasn’t too awful.” 

“It’s alright, the clean-up was fine.” While happy to see Pearl, Skizz was struggling to hide his glum mood.

Pearl clocked on instantly, eyes narrowing slightly. “Are you okay, Skizzley? You seem upset.”

Skizz sighed slightly. He knew better than to hide his emotions, his wings were a visual indicator of what was happening in his head. And unfortunately, Pearl was the most eagle-eyed person he knew. “Impulse is really upset with me, and rightfully so.”

Pearl winced slightly, and Skizz felt her guilt strike his heart. “Yeah, I heard from Grian that he had a rough time. It doesn’t help that Scott and I were a bit mean as well.”

Skizz was shocked. “Pearl, you and Scott are the nicest people I know! What could you have possibly done?”

“Oh, he was talking about you a bit and Scott and I shared a mischievous look, because y’know…” Pearl trailed off as Skizz looked at her confusedly. 

“Y’know what, Pearly?” Skizz tried to appear jolly, but he didn’t know what was happening.

“Oh, nothing!” Pearl flushed bright red, not meeting Skizz’s stare. 

Skizz didn’t have the energy to grill her about it. He just wanted to make it through the day without crying about Impulse’s distress. “Okay, Pearl, it was nice to see you, but I’m going to be late for class!” 

“Oh, yeah, of course! See you later, mate!” Pearl quickly walked away, and Skizz could sense the embarrassment she was feeling, although he couldn’t imagine why.

Skizz found his way to his history class, getting all twisted around on the way. Partly due to his mental state, and partly due to being severely directionally challenged. Slumping into his seat, he felt his communicator ping from his pocket. Pulling the device out, he saw a reminder flash across the screen that made his stomach churn.

Notification Centre: Band Practice @ 3:45 pm

Shit. Skizz had completely forgotten that it was Monday, which meant that they had band practice after school. Given Impulse’s current state, he wouldn’t be surprised if the demon didn’t show up at all. Skizz remembered when he had asked Impulse to be a part of their crew, how anxious he had been, even though he ended up agreeing, and all the guys loved him now.

It mirrored the anxiety that Skizz had felt coming from Impulse when he was invited to the Halloween party. Impulse had contemplated for a long time before tentatively agreeing. While Skizz remembered that his face bore a smile, he had ignored the worry and unease that Impulse emanated.

…

Skizz was glad they had cleared everything up. He truly hadn’t meant to ignore Impulse, but the stupid test was practically impossible. Not to mention that he had woken up from a bad dream that morning that reminded him of things he didn’t want to remember. But they had talked it out, and now Impy was going to tutor him! Maybe he would finally be able to wrap his head around calculus now.

Impulse was about to hop out of the car, but Skizz had one more thing he wanted to ask him. He knew it might be a stretch, but he wanted Impulse to come so desperately. He reached out for Impulse as he opened the door, stopping him for a moment.

“Oh, one more thing, and I totally understand if you don’t want to.” Skizz’s heart was racing slightly, but he kept up his smile, trying to mask his stress.

Impulse nodded rapidly, and a similar smile stretched across his face. He had a gentle look that made Skizz melt slightly, and he mustered the courage to blurt out the rest of his sentence.

“I’m hosting a Halloween party at my house, full costume style. Mainly so I can meet some more people. But, I would really like it if you would come.”

Skizz watched as the smile dropped from Impulse’s face, and he felt Impulse’s emotions race through his brain. Uncertain, anxious, considerate, hopeful, unease, optimistic, pessimistic. Impulse stayed silent for a while, a musing look overtaking his face. 

Skizz waited patiently as Impulse fidgeted with his shirt, his hair, his horns, anything he could find. As time passed, Skizz found his eyes widening in anticipation, hoping and praying that Impulse would say yes.

Impulse eventually looked towards Skizz, not making eye contact and fidgeting with the collar of his shirt. “I’ll come, Skizz.” His voice wavered slightly. Skizz felt unease radiating off the demon, but he ignored it in favour of his own excitement.

“That’s awesome! I’ll add you to the group chat closer to the time!” Skizz was elated, practically bouncing in his seat.

“Can’t wait.” Impulse was still fidgeting, and the tip of his tail was lashing back and forth since he was still sitting down. “Bye, Skizz.” Impulse opened the door, ready to dash to his front door to avoid getting soaked.

“See ya, Impy!” Skizz watched Impulse sprint to his front door, a wide grin encompassing his face. His happiness faded slightly as the door closed, and he was left with anxiety that thickened the air around him, that didn’t belong to him. Shaking his head slightly, he ignored it, driving home with a smile on his face.

…

He should have taken that as a sign. He should have told Impulse that he didn’t need to come, that it was okay if he didn’t want to. But Skizz had wanted Impulse to be there so desperately, to see what costume he would come up with and talk about anything and everything with him in a dark corner of a crowded room. He wanted to feel like the world was just them two, and everyone and everything else was just filler. He had let his selfishness get the better of him, and now he was paying the price.

Skizz didn’t pay attention to his class, the ramblings of his history teacher sliding off his brain like water. He was too busy letting his brain run circles around itself, of guilt and regret and misery. All he could think about was Impulse’s shrunken form, curled into the fetal position as sobs racked his body. His silence on the drive home, his waves of nausea and distress penetrating Skizz’s brain. The way he scurried away, completely avoiding not just him, but Scar and Grian as well.

…

Skizz trudged his way towards the music room, trying to mentally prepare himself for practice. Exhaustion overwhelmed his body from his brain running in circles the whole day, focusing on nothing except his guilt. Pushing the door open, he was glad to find that he was the first one there. Collapsing onto his drumming stool, Skizz leaned back slightly, trying to set his poker face for when someone walked in.

As if on cue, the door swung open, revealing Bdubs and Etho chattering wildly about something.

“Hey, baby!” Bdubs hollered, waving at Skizz.

“Bdouble-down! Etho!” Skizz grinned, getting up to give Bdubs a clap on the shoulder and a fist bump for Etho.

“What’s up, Skizz!” Etho sounded like he was smiling behind his mask.

“I’m good, buddy.” Skizz gritted his teeth slightly, hoping his lie was believable.

The door swung open yet again, and Impulse quietly snuck in. Skizz froze for a moment. He wasn’t expecting Impulse to show up. They locked eyes for a moment, and Skizz could feel Impulse’s uneasiness. 

“Heya, Impulse!” Etho called, waving at the demon from his keyboard.

“What’s up, Impy!” Bdubs also greeted, fiddling around with his microphone stand.

“Hi guys,” Impulse waved at them both, but completely ignored Skizz and headed to the backroom to find his tech. Skizz felt his heart sink as the demon vanished around the corner.

Skizz’s soul left his body as two warm hands slammed down onto his shoulders. Whipping around, he saw Tango laughing maniacally, flames on his head flickering with glee. “Hey, Top.” Skizz couldn’t help but sound slightly dejected, even though he was happy to see Tango.

Tango’s demeanour instantly changed, a look of concern passing over his face. His eyes flitted behind Skizz, and he turned around to see what Tango was looking at. It was Impulse, joking around with Etho like nothing was happening. Like him and Skizz were completely fine. Impulse had always been convinced that Etho didn’t like him, maybe he had finally gotten past that?

“Hi, Tango!” Impulse called, giving him a small wave. Tango looked at Skizz, confusion etched into his face. He walked away, leaving Skizz to ruminate in silence. He headed back to his drums, tuning them aggressively.

“Okay, boys! Let’s get started!” Bdubs announced, testing the microphone. 

Tango, Etho, and Impulse dispersed, heading to their instruments and Impulse to his tech booth.

Bdubs huffed slightly, getting annoyed at their lack of urgency. Once everyone was in place, he got himself into position, taking a deep breath before calling “And a one, two, a one, two, three, four…” 

…

Everyone was getting ready to leave, picking up bags and saying farewell from the door. Not Skizz. He was sitting at his drums, readying himself for more practice once everyone was gone. He prided himself on his drumming skills, but this practice had made him question himself. He knew that his poor performance was attributed to the fact that Impulse was being friendly with everyone except him. And the guilt that was churning in his stomach. 

Skizz watched as Impulse walked out the door, waving goodbye to Tango as he closed the door. Skizz couldn’t bring himself to follow Impulse, to beg for forgiveness that he didn’t deserve. He just sat at the drums, waiting for Tango to leave so he could let off some steam.

But Tango’s eyes shifted away from Impulse’s departure and towards Skizz, red eyes looking at him as though they were trying to decode his innermost thoughts. Tango sauntered over, a playful but concerned look on his face.

“Soooooo, are we gonna talk about it?” Tango asked, folding his arms and tapping his foot.

“Talk about what?” Skizz chuckled slightly, trying to deflect.

Tango smacked his shoulder, annoyance radiating off him. “You know what! Why is Impulse ignoring you?!”

Skizz sighed, contending with the fact that he would have to talk to Tango. Curse the blaze for recognising his every twitch. “Impulse is upset with me because of Halloween.”

“What happened on Halloween?” Tango seemed confused.

“What do you mean?” Skizz just sighed, not wanting to tell the whole story again. “I invited him to the party and he had an awful time and had a really bad panic attack and it’s all my fault because I should have known that he would hate it-”

“Woahh, breathificate a bit, would you?” Tango rested his hand on Skizz’s shoulder, helping calm him down a bit. Tango continued, “Why is that your fault exactly?”

“Because he just wanted to make me happy, it would have been better if I had never asked.” Skizz’s wings drooped, dragging along the carpet as he went to grab his bag.

“Dude, Skizz, it is not your fault. I’m sure he’s not mad at you; he’s probably just feeling humiliated.”

“Yeah, but if I hadn’t invited him then he wouldn’t have-”

Tango gripped Skizz’s shoulder tightly, warm hands getting hotter by the second. “Listen to me. I don’t know if you’ve experienced a panic attack before, but I cannot stress enough how humiliating they are, even if you have privacy. The loss of control is one of the worst feelings in the world. And Impulse experienced that in the middle of a party, full of people he hardly knows.” Tango’s voice started to shake slightly, and he took a deep breath. “I’m sure he isn’t mad at you; he’s just feeling embarrassed and dealing with the loss of control he experienced.”

Skizz pondered for a moment, taking in Tango’s words. While he has had moments of panic, they typically fizzled out before they reached panic-attack level. He hadn’t considered that maybe Impulse was just embarrassed and didn’t hate him.

“I’m so right,” Tango smirked, watching as understanding came over Skizz’s face.

“Shut up!” Skizz shoved Tango playfully. “You are, but it doesn’t change the fact that he will not talk to me.”

“So why don’t you talk to him?”

“Don’t wanna make him anxious.”

“So what? You’re just going to stress about this for the rest of time?” Tango tapped his foot impatiently, glowering at Skizz.

“Dude, you don’t know him like I do! I don’t wanna push it because it will just push him further away!” Skizz folded his arms, wings raised behind him.

Tango seemed hesitant at this answer, furrowing his brows slightly. “For someone who knows Impulse so well, you seem pretty happy to just let him run away.”

Skizz recoiled slightly, confused by how Tango emphasised that sentence. “What do you mean so well? What are you implying?”

“I’m just saying, dude, you guys have gotten super close recently, and you keep saying that you know what he wants. But do you think he would be okay with you making no efforts whatsoever to communicate with him?”

Skizz contemplated, going over it in his mind. Tango had a point. Skizz wasn’t sure if Impulse would want him to reach out or if he would on his own terms. But that didn’t deter him from the truth that Impulse was extremely flighty, and could run away forever if Skizz went about this wrong.

“Look, Top, I appreciate your advice, really. You’re probably right. But I’m still gonna leave him be for a while, and if he doesn’t reach out, then I promise I will.”

Tango looked unsure for a moment, then nodded rapidly. Skizz could sense the exhaustion coming off him; he clearly didn’t feel like arguing anymore. “If you’re sure, Skizz.” Tango slung his arm around him.

“I am, buddy.” Skizz wrapped his wing around the two, bringing them to turn off the lights and leave the room. Skizz had accepted that he would probably have to wait for Impulse to reach out, however long that would take. But for now, he would be friendly with Impulse and hope that the guilt didn’t completely destroy him while he waited.

Chapter Text

Impulse was desperately looping around the kitchen counter, switching to the incense to hopefully keep the ghost at bay. Clicking desperately, he realised all too late that he had forgotten to grab the lighter from the truck. The ghost caught up to him, and pale, gangly fingers closed around his eyes as the bell rang to signify his death.

Huffing loudly, the home screen revealed that the ghost was a Yurei, while Zed chuckled maniacally into Impulse’s headphones. “Nice looping, buddy!” 

Impulse could practically see the glee on his face, despite neither having a facecam on. “Oh, shut up! You barely lasted five minutes!”

“That wasn’t my fault! The ghost had it out for me!”

“Yeah, probably because you never stop talking!”

Zedaph kept laughing, and Impulse also felt a giggle in his throat. He let it loose, wheezing into his microphone along with Zed.

“Dude, we suck at this game.” Zed’s voice was still shaking slightly from laughter.

“Yeah, you do!”

“Oh, enough.”

Their laughter eventually ceased, a comfortable silence falling between the pair. Impulse heard a slight gasp from the other end, and a clatter that sounded like Zedaph moving some things around.

“What’s happening over there, Zed?” 

“Oh, I have a science thingy I have to go to that starts in like, half an hour.”

“I thought you didn’t have school right now?”

“I don’t, it’s extra credit.”

“Nerd.”

“Whatever! Don’t you need to go to sleep anyway?”

Flicking open his communicator, Impulse saw that it was almost three am. “Yikes, didn’t even realise the time.”

“Go to sleep, man, you have school soon.”

“Yeah, yeah, goodnight, Zed.”

“Night, Impulse!”

Impulse shut down his computer and crawled into his bed. His mind only gave him a moment of peace before racing again, running itself in circles about anything and everything. Mainly about going to school and having to be in close proximity to Skizz. Although it had been about three weeks since Halloween, Impulse and Skizz still hadn’t spoken. Impulse had ignored him the whole time, allowing his brain to convince him that Skizz hates him.

Enough time had passed that Impulse no longer felt overwhelmed by being in class next to him, and was able to focus back on his work. And on the brief, dismayed glances that Skizz shoots at him every so often. Rationally, Impulse knew that his brain was probably tricking him, that Skizz still wanted to be his friend. But it had been too long since it had happened, and reaching out would be too awkward now.

It’s not like he was completely avoiding Skizz; he still went to band practices and sat next to him in class. But their tutoring sessions had stopped, and Impulse could see that Skizz was back to struggling in class. But he just couldn’t bring himself to talk to Skizz, to look him in the eye when Skizz had seen him in such a humiliating position.

A yawn escaped his lips, and he felt his eyelids being forcefully tugged down as though his body was trying to hypnotise him into sleep. He succumbed, letting the overthinking cease as darkness claimed him.

…

Impulse did not want to deal with calculus today. He was operating on four hours' sleep (although that was his fault), and Mr Masu was practically acting as a drill sergeant in preparation for their final, which was in a month. He could hear his teacher droning on in the background, but the words all fizzled out before his brain could process them.

Looking to his right, he saw that Scar was somehow keeping up with what Mr Masu was saying. Impulse could see him casually noting down the stuff on the board, without even trying to rush. Grian was also faring okay, albeit scribbling more desperately than Scar. 

Skizz, on the other hand, seemed to have given up. He was slumped over his desk, which didn’t even have a pencil on it, let alone a book. His wings were drooping to the floor, and Skizz had his eyes shut, like he was trying to forget this entire lesson. He shifted his head to the side and was now facing Impulse, although his eyes were still closed.

Impulse jumped slightly, thinking that Skizz was trying to get his attention. The embarrassment hit him instantly, and he whipped his head back to the front of the class. Why should he care if Skizz looked at him? Impulse was the one who lost his mind over an imaginary problem. Skizz would never actually stop being his friend just because he had a panic attack. But the thought of being perceived after his panic attack filled him with dread. He already felt like eyes were on him at all times, which didn’t need to become a reality.

Avoiding everyone was easier. Besides, it had been nearly a month, and Skizz still hadn’t reached out. Clearly, that meant he didn’t want to talk. 

Impulse looked back towards Skizz, except this time the angel’s eyes were wide open and staring straight at him. They had an indistinguishable emotion in them, a combination of concern and hope and sadness and understanding. Impulse couldn’t bring himself to look away, allowing those blue eyes to captivate them while neither made a move. 

A crash sounded next to them, and they both leapt out of their skin. Looking over, they saw that Scar had dropped his drink bottle on the floor. He looked sheepishly at them, and then at the teacher, who was tapping his foot impatiently.

Impulse looked towards the board, seeing a whole new set of notes that he hadn’t been taking down. Figuring it was too late to catch up, he went back to doodling in his book, drawing random shapes to pass the time. He could still feel eyes boring into his soul, and spared a glance to his right to find the source. Skizz was still looking at him as though he were the most interesting person in the world, a slightly more optimistic look on his face.

Impulse turned his attention back to the front, where Mr Masu was dishing out their daily homework. Skizz’s gaze was stuck in his mind, his brain running circles around what it could mean. It was becoming harder and harder for Impulse to convince himself that Skizz wanted nothing to do with him.

The bell rang, sparing Impulse from his misery. Heading towards the door, he dejectedly grabbed a worksheet from the stack Mr Masu was holding at the door, and headed to his next class. Looking back once, he saw Skizz walking the other way, wings perked up slightly. Impulse couldn’t imagine why.

…

Impulse had gone back to his roots. He barely spoke to anyone anymore, save for the BEST band guys, and the occasional conversation with Pearl in class. On the days when he didn’t have band practice, it was possible for him to go the entire day without having a single conversation with anyone. And that was the way he liked it. No people to talk to, no one to perceive him, no one to think he was weird. Bliss.

He rarely even went to the cafeteria for lunch anymore; the loud chatter and fighting for a seat at a table were enough to put him over the edge. He opted for hiding away in the furthest corner of the library, doing homework or watching videos on his communicator while munching on whatever he had taken from his house that morning. He was fine with being alone. He would never yearn for social interaction, for someone to talk to and care about him. He wasn’t yearning to talk to Skizz again, to laugh with Grian and Scar and study with them after school. He wasn’t being reminded of the three long years he spent at this school without a single friend in the world. Not at all.

Even if Impulse was succeeding at putting those thoughts out of his brain and ignoring the gut-wrenching loneliness he was feeling, there was one person who would not stop bugging him about it. Feeling a buzz in his pocket as he sat down on his favourite armchair, he groaned slightly, knowing he was about to be pestered. Flicking it open, he saw the message on the screen.

Zedaph: What are you up to, Impulse?

After the Halloween party, Impulse had caved and messaged Zed everything that happened. Since then, Zed had been messaging him every spare minute he had. Due to the time difference, that meant that Impulse’s phone was always blowing up with messages during his lunch break, since all Zed was doing at that time was sitting at home.

Impulse: zed im literally just sitting in the library

Impulse: im not going insane dont worry about me

Zedaph: Dude, you have literally isolated yourself from every single one of your friends except me. Forgive me for being concerned.

Impulse: didnt we have this exact conversation yesterday

Zedaph: Probably, because you’re so stubborn and never tell me what’s actually happening in your brain!

Impulse: i told u about the halloween party didnt i

Zedaph: Yeah! And you told me how much it reminded you of what happened to you before! That’s not something you’re going to get over immediately!

Zedaph: I know something is going on with you, I just wish you would tell me so I can help!

Impulse: touche

Zedaph: Amazing! So what’s happening in your brain buddy?

Impulse: not telling

Zedaph: I wish you would understand that it’s not a crime to need help sometimes

Impulse: i dont think its a crime

Impulse: because there is nothing wrong

Impulse: i am fine

Zedaph: LIAR

Impulse: zed u cant help me anyway whats the point

Impulse: im used to it, been dealing with this for the past 3 years

Zedaph: I know you’re used to it and stuff, but it doesn’t make it easier for me to watch you go through it man

Impulse felt his stomach drop slightly. He hadn’t realised that his self-destructive tendencies affected Zed that much. That was why he kept everything to himself; so other people wouldn’t be upset. Turns out he was making other people upset anyway.

Impulse: ok ok ok im sorry i havent opened up more 

Impulse: i just dont like how much i rely on you, you should be spending your time doing your fun science stuff, not trying to fix me

Zedaph: We’re friends man, I’m meant to help you when you’re having a bad time. 

Impulse: ill try my best to open up in the future i promise

Impulse: just not right now

Zedaph: Fair enough, message me when you’re ready! I’m going to make dinner now

Impulse: see ya zed

Zedaph: Bye Impulse!

Impulse wasn’t going to be opening up to Zed anytime soon. Sure, Zed knew everything that had happened to Impulse in the past and how it had triggered his panic attack, but that didn’t mean Impulse wanted to talk about his problems. He would have to be locked in a room with Zed for that to happen.

He needed a distraction. He didn’t want to think about Zed’s insistence that Impulse open up, or that he had band practice after school. And he especially didn’t want to think about how Skizz had looked at him earlier. Opening the video reels function on his communicator, he indulged in some mindless short videos to pass the time until he had to go to class. 

…

Impulse was cranking the volume on his headphones, allowing the rock music to drown out all of his thoughts as drums and electric guitar thrummed loudly in his ears. He could feel his tail swishing back and forth to the beat as he strolled towards the music room.

Out of nowhere, two warm hands slammed down onto his shoulders, making him shriek loudly. Turning around, face flushed pink from embarrassment, he saw Tango, doubled over with laughter.

Pulling his headphones off his head, he heard Tango’s raspy giggle echoing throughout the hallway. Despite his embarrassment, Impulse couldn’t help but laugh along, infected by Tango’s glee.

“I’m sorry, Impy!” Tango wheezed slightly as he rubbed his eyes. “I could hear your music from a few feet behind you, and I just couldn’t resist.”

Yikes. Impulse hadn’t realised how loud his music had been. “Oops, bit too loud then.”

“Yeah, take care of your eardrums, buddy!” Tango clapped him on the shoulder, and Impulse flinched slightly, still not fully comfortable with the rampant physical touch between the members of the band.

Tango didn’t appear to notice, continuing to ramble about something as they approached the music room. “-So if you could help, that would be great!”

Impulse paused, trying to remember what Tango had just told him. He had been too busy freaking out over being clapped on the shoulder to listen to what he had been saying. But the look on the blaze’s face was too expectant for him to say no. “Yeah, sure!” Impulse tried to be enthusiastic, hoping the situation warranted it.

Tango initially looked slightly taken aback, but his expression dissolved into a smile. “Thanks, Impy!”

Tango pulled the door to the music room, waving Impulse through with a bow. Impulse just scoffed at his antics, heading towards the backroom to organise the equipment. While he was rummaging, he heard Bdubs and Etho walk in, based on the cheery ‘Hey, Baby!’ that sounded from the other room.

After a few minutes, the sound of Etho going ‘Heyo,’ and the ‘Wassup, buddy!’ In reply,  indicated that Skizz had just walked in. He felt his heart rate speed up slightly, his breathing getting faster in response. It’s just Skizz, nothing is going to happen. Impulse decided to escape from his corner, a bundle of cables in his arms.

“Hey, Impy!” Etho called, waving from his keyboard.

“Hi, Etho.” Impulse waved back, a wide smile on his face. He still doesn’t think Etho actually likes him.

Impulse went to his booth, plugging things in so they could get started. He heard Skizz speaking to everyone from his drums, and Impulse stuck his head out to listen.

“I have to leave early today, I’ve got something to do.” Skizz looked around the room, with a quick glance flitting over Impulse.

“But we have to practice!” Bdubs whined, resembling an upset toddler.

“You’ll be fine, I only have to leave like five minutes early.”

“Whatever, man.”

“You love me!” Skizz seemed slightly indignant at Bdub’s groaning. 

“Sure do, buddy!” Bdubs grinned and turned back to his microphone, tapping it to test for sound. “Are we ready, everyone?”

There was a resounding ‘yes’ from everyone, and Bdubs began to count them in. “One, two, one two three four!”

…

“See ya, guys!” Skizz waved to them all with a grin as he walked out of the music room.

“Bye!” Etho called.

“See ya later, jerky!” Tango stuck his tongue out as Skizz walked out, to which Skizz promptly opened the door back up and stuck his middle finger through it.

Bdubs started packing his stuff up with a huff, moving the microphone he was using to the back of the room.

“Quit being cranky!” Tango teased, grinning at Bdub’s mini-tantrum. “We don’t even have anyone to perform for!”

“I’m working on it! I’m trying to get us a spot in the spring festival!” Bdub put his hands on his hips, staring at the rest of the group.

Impulse felt his stomach drop slightly at the prospect of having to be on stage in front of a crowd. Maybe he would be able to get away with doing everything behind the scenes. Looking over at Etho, he looked similarly anxious, tapping his foot rapidly and fidgeting with his mask. At least that was one thing they had in common.

“Oh, I didn’t know that. Awesome!” Tango walked over to clap Bdubs on the shoulder. Bdubs reciprocated with a sigh, but Impulse could see the smile tugging at the corner of his mouth.

“I'm out, guys! Hurry up, Bdubs, I wanna go home.” Etho called across the room, and Bdubs scurried over to meet him, picking up his bag on the way.

“Bye!” Impulse waved to them as they walked out the door. He picked up his own bag and made his way out.

“Woah, aren’t you gonna help me?” 

Impulse stopped in his tracks as Tango looked at him expectantly. Impulse racked his brain, trying to remember what he agreed to, but nothing came up. “Help with what?” Impulse said sheepishly.

“Moving some equipment from the storage room! I asked you earlier, remember?”

Ah. That’s what he agreed to when he wasn’t listening. All Impulse wanted to do was go home and play Phasmo with Zed, but clearly that wasn’t happening.

“Oh yeah! Sorry, spaced out.”

“It’s okay! Come this way, Impy!” Tango walked off, gesturing for Impulse to follow. They walked through the winding hallways, ending up at a dead-end with a decrepit door in the centre of the wall.

“Weird space.” Impulse cringed slightly at the water stains rimming the ceiling.

“Yeah, we have to move all this stuff so it doesn’t get damaged by moisture.” Tango opened the door, standing right in the middle of the doorframe, obscuring Impulse’s view of the room. 

“Well, what are we moving?” Impulse tried to push his way in, but Tango didn’t budge. He shot Tango a confused look, but the blaze just looked at him frantically.

“Oh, just some stuff.” Tango’s eyes were darting back and forth. 

“Okay, let’s go in then?” Impulse had no idea what was happening.

“Yeah. Look, you gotta promise you’re not gonna be mad at me, Impy.” Tango looked terrified, the flames on his head flickering wildly, still holding his stance in the doorway.

“Why would I be mad at you?” Impulse shoved his way through, getting stressed out by Tango’s weird behaviour. His stomach instantly dropped as he looked around the corner.

Skizz. Standing there, shuffling his feet, wings tensed up behind him. “Hey, buddy.”

Impulse turned to look at Tango, betrayal wrapped around his heart. “Did you know about this?”

Tango dropped his head. “Yes! Skizz was really upset that you guys hadn’t talked in ages, so I said I would help him! I just want you guys to be friends again.”

Impulse looked back at Skizz, who had a hopeful look on his face. 

“Anywayyyyyy, I’m gonna leave you two in here and come back in ten minutes! Keep it PG!” Tango had an awkward smile as he said that last part.

“What the! Don’t make it weird!” Skizz groaned as Tango walked away, shutting the two in there.

Impulse felt his heart rate quickening, the walls closing in on him. He could feel his face flushing and his tail lashing back and forth.

“Woah, hey, we’re not locked in. I’ll crack the door open, m’kay?” Skizz moved towards the door handle, pushing the door open and sticking his head out to make sure Tango wasn’t sitting there. Pulling his head back in, he looked back at Impulse, a gentle expression on his face.

Impulse had no idea how Skizz had recognised his claustrophobia so quickly, but he was grateful. They both paused, unsure who was going to talk to first.

“Impy, I-”

“I’m sorry-”

They both paused again, looking at each other. Impulse nodded slightly, and Skizz continued.

“Impy, I miss you. I miss talking to you, I miss laughing with you, but mostly I miss how good you were at tutoring.” Skizz laughed slightly at that last bit.

“Shut up.” Impulse laughed too, finally able to distinguish when Skizz was being serious or not.

“But seriously, I want to talk to you again. I know you’re embarrassed by what happened, and you think I think you’re weird or something crazy, but I don’t think that. I promise your brain is playing tricks on you.”

Impulse felt tears pricking the back of his eyes at the genuineness he was being faced with. Skizz had somehow clocked exactly what he was thinking, without even talking to him about it. It was like he had magical powers or something.

“Can you say something, please?”

Impulse snapped out of his stupor and looked into Skizz’s wide blue eyes. “I can’t believe you just figured me out like this!” Impulse clicked his fingers for dramatic effect, getting a chuckle out of Skizz. “But you’re right, I’ve been avoiding you because I’m embarrassed. But I don’t blame you at all, I just couldn’t bring myself to face you after you saw me like that.”

“Yeah, I get that. But I don’t judge you for it; that party was awful. I still feel bad for inviting you.” Skizz rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly.

“But it’s not your fault that you wanted me to come!”

“Yeah, and it’s not your fault you hated it!”

“Stop blaming yourself!”

“You stop blaming yourself!”

Impulse locked eyes with Skizz, stubbornness evident in both their expressions. Impulse kept his gaze on Skizz, not backing down. Skizz’s eyes watered, and he blinked hard. Impulse dissolved into giggles as Skizz flailed slightly, wailing about his eyes burning. 

“You win!” He cried, wiping his eyes. He stuck his hand out, looking at Impulse expectantly.

Impulse took his hand, shaking it hard. He felt a small pit in his stomach, a need to explain why he had spiralled so hard that night, even though he didn’t want to. “Skizz, I want you to know-”

“You don’t have to tell me, Impy Dimpy. I can tell you have something in your past that’s been affecting you, and you don’t need to talk about it.” Skizz smiled, putting his hand on Impulse’s shoulder.

Impulse was grateful. He didn’t want to talk about it, but he felt like he owed Skizz an explanation. It was nice to know that he didn’t have to justify his every thought and feeling. However, his brain was more focused on something else. 

“Did you just call me Impy Dimpy?”

Skizz stalled for a moment, processing Impulse’s words. A grin came over his face as he responded, “You know me and nicknames, buddy! It’ll never stop.”

Impulse just laughed, pushing past him to get out of the room. Tango was waiting at the end of the hallway, biting his nails anxiously. He looked up as Impulse and Skizz came out of the room, running towards them, practically shaking with anticipation. “Are you guys friends again? Are we all happy and stuff?!”

“Yes, Tanog, we’re friends again. For the record, we were never not friends! Just not talking!” Skizz went to rub his knuckles on Tango’s head, before deciding to punch him instead so he wouldn’t get singed.

“Yeah, get with it, Tango!” Impulse laughed at Tango, who was indignantly trying to escape Skizz’s bear hug.

“Whatever, jerkies.” Tango stormed off.

“Love you!” Skizz yelled as Tango exited the building. He turned to Impulse, smiling at him. “You want a ride home?”

Impulse nodded enthusiastically as they walked towards Skizz’s car. Knowing that despite his anxiety, he still had someone willing to accept it and not try to change him helped reduce the pit in his stomach to just a speck. Looking over at Skizz, he saw a faint golden ring glowing above his head that he had never noticed before.

“I didn’t know you had a halo, Skizz.”

Skizz blushed pink and looked upwards to see if he could spot it. “I don’t usually, but it comes and goes.”

“Oh, cool!” Impulse grinned as he got in the car, not noticing Skizz's gaze filled with adoration as the halo grew brighter above his head.

Chapter Text

Impulse pulled his scarf tighter around him, trying to bundle himself up as he waited for class to end. Despite being inside, the winter chill pierced his bones and made it impossible for him to function. Looking towards his friends, he saw Scar and Skizz twiddling their thumbs, while Grian reviewed the test one last time.

It was the last day of the semester, and everyone was excited for Christmas break. And as a parting gift, Mr Masu had made them do their calculus final. All they wanted to do was make it through the day, maybe even have some fun in their classes. But instead, they had to slave over an inconceivably difficult test, while their teeth chattered and toes froze. At least Impulse knew he had done relatively well, answering every question except for one.

Impulse saw that Skizz was smiling at him, holding his thumb up with glee. Impulse beamed back, glad that Skizz had done okay on the final as well. They had been studying harder than ever in the past month, trying to make up for the three-week gap where neither of them knew what was happening in class. Impulse was just grateful that ignoring Skizz for three weeks hadn’t been completely detrimental to his performance. He never would have forgiven himself otherwise.

“Times up!” Mr Masu hollered from the front of the class. The sound of pens and pencils dropping on the desk sounded in harmony, as students looked up with a groan. Mr Masu roamed around, collecting all the test papers with a sadistic smile on his face.

The bell rang, freeing them all from the torture. Impulse and Skizz hopped up in synchronisation, smiling at each other as they walked out the door. 

“How’d you do, Skizz?” Impulse punched him lightly.

“Not awful, I think I passed.” Skizz grinned and slung his arm around Impulse. The pair had become more touchy recently, with Impulse not finding it as overwhelming as he used to. That was a trait specifically reserved for Skizz; touch from anyone else made him freak out. Impulse hadn’t quite figured out why yet.

“What about you, ya nerd?” Skizz prodded Impulse jokingly, knowing the answer.

“I did well, answered everything, so I should be fine!” Impulse felt a bit bashful, knowing that Skizz was about to begin his onslaught of compliments.

“You’re so smart, it really freaks me out, man!” Skizz groaned slightly, but Impulse could see that he still had an endearing look on his face. 

“Whatever, I’m not that smart!” Impulse looked away, feeling his face heat up.

“Yeah, you are!”

“Am not!”

“Oi!” A different voice yelled at them while they stood staring at each other stubbornly. They turned to see Grian and Scar waving them down.

“Hey guys!” Skizz chirped, pulling Scar in for a hug.

“Hi Skizzy, hi Impulse!” Scar smirked at them both.

“Hey!” Impulse grinned at both of them, wondering what they wanted.

Grian smiled at all of them, wings flared out slightly. “Now that calculus hell is over for the next couple of weeks, we were wondering if you guys wanted to go celebrate at that cafe we always study at? Y’know, just as friends, instead of classmates?” He shuffled slightly, as though he was nervous to ask. Impulse didn’t think he had ever seen Grian nervous before.

“Course, buddy!” Skizz looked over at Impulse, who nodded in agreement.

“Yeah, it’ll be fun!” Impulse beamed at Grian, hoping to ease his nerves slightly.

Grian seemed to calm down slightly, his wings dropping slightly as the tension released. “Cool, do you wanna meet after school and walk?”

“I can give you all a ride!” Skizz grinned as the others seemed to perk up slightly. “Too cold to walk there, and I drove to school anyway.”

“Thanks, Skizzy!” Scar clapped Skizz on the shoulder.

“Yeah, thanks dude.” Grian smiled gratefully at Skizz. “Anyway, Scar and I are off. We have a study period now.”

“Okay, see ya guys!” Skizz waved at them as the pair walked off, hand in hand. “Bye, Impy Dimpy!” Skizz walked off, a pep in his step that made his wings bounce.

Impulse just smiled at his cheeriness before turning around and heading to his physics class.

…

Impulse zipped up his jacket, the polar blast seeping into his bones as he waited for everyone to show up. Other students pushed past him, equally desperate to get out of the cold.

“Hi!” Scar approached from the art classrooms, Grian hanging off his arm like a needy partner.

“Hey guys! It's a bit cold out here!” Impulse jogged in place slightly to emphasise his point.

“Ya think?!” Grian’s teeth were chattering, wings tucked close to his back so the icy wind wouldn’t whip through them. 

Scar was shuddering violently, shivers taking over his whole body due to his not bringing a jacket. Grian looked over, seeing the state they were all in and unleashed his wings, wrapping them around the group to protect them from the cold. 

Impulse tucked in close, allowing their combined body heat to ease the chill slightly.

“Thanks, Gri!” Scar smiled against Grian’s head, while Grian just rolled his eyes fondly.

“Guys, what are you doing?” 

The trio shuffled around, still enveloped in Grian’s wings, to see Skizz looking at them while stifling a laugh.

“Cold!” Scar yelped as a stronger gust of wind blew through the air.

“Come on, then!” Skizz gestured towards his car.

Grian and Scar broke into a sprint, racing each other to get the front seat. Impulse watched as Grian pushed Scar aside, flinging open the passenger door and hopping in the front with glee. Scar just accepted it, wrenching the back door open.

As they approached the car, Skizz skipped ahead of him, pulling the door open and bowing. “After you,” he announced dramatically.

Impulse blushed slightly as he sat down, before being met with a smirk from Scar.

“Such a kind boyfriend!” Grian clapped Skizz on the back as the angel got into the driver’s seat.

“What the, we’re not together!” Skizz had a look of slight disbelief on his face as Grian and Scar shared a knowing glance.

“Sure, buddy.” Scar grinned, looking between Skizz and Impulse with a cheeky smirk.

Impulse felt his face flushing more, mainly from embarrassment. Skizz was just being nice, right? There wasn’t any romantic attraction from either of them.

“Whatever, dude!” Skizz put the car into reverse, backing out of the parking lot and heading towards the cafe.

…

They all headed in, excited to escape the freezing winds. The warmth of the cafe hit Impulse immediately, like a warm blanket being wrapped around him.

“Oh, thank the void we’re inside!” Grian pulled off his jacket, fluffing out his wings with a happy sigh. 

“It was not that cold!” Skizz prodded Grian in the side, inciting a hiss from the avian.

“It was!” Impulse, Scar, and Grian chorused together before looking at each other confusedly and bursting into giggles.

Amidst his laughter, Impulse noticed that other patrons of the cafe were giving them displeased looks. He froze, snapping out of his glee as he felt their stares boring into his soul.

“Alright, guys, let’s go sit down.” Skizz dragged the giggling pair towards a table, glancing back at Impulse before instantly turning back around.

Did he know that I was about to freak out? Impulse straight up did not understand Skizz. It was like the man had a superpower that enabled him to see into his mind and figure out what he was feeling. 

Following the group, Impulse sat down next to Skizz in the booth they chose, shooting him a brief look to see if he could figure out whether Skizz knew what he had just done.

Skizz’s warm smile and slightly crinkled blue eyes affirmed his question. 

“Stop making goo-goo eyes at each other!” Scar whined, looking at them like a child who had to watch their parents kiss.

Impulse just rolled his eyes while Skizz babbled nonsense at Scar and Grian. They kept elbowing each other, razzing Skizz more and more as he got increasingly frustrated.

“You’re so easy to make fun of!” Grian laughed and pointed at Skizz, where steam was practically coming out of his ears.

“Are you guys gonna order anything?”

The group looked to the edge of the table, where Gem was standing there thoroughly unimpressed. She was tapping a pencil against a pad of paper, and her antlers were sticking up through her mass of curly hair.

“Hi, Gemmy!” Skizz smiled at her, and she sneered fondly in return.

“Hi Gem!” Grian flung his wing out to hit her, but she deftly moved to the side. 

“You guys are gremlins, what do you want?” Gem rolled her eyes as Grian kept trying to flick her with his wing.

“Vanilla latte and a strawberry doughnut for me!” Skizz grinned, rubbing his hands together greedily.

“Double chocolate chip frappe and a chocolate doughnut, please!” Scar smiled as Gem scribbled down their orders.

“Just a dirty chai for me,” Grian leaned back with a sulk, finally tucking his wings in.

“I’ll have a hot chocolate.” Impulse wasn’t feeling all that hungry, the cold tended to freeze up all his bodily functions, including hunger. One time during a blizzard when he was younger, he didn’t eat anything for almost three days because he never felt hungry.

“Awesome, I’ll get that out for you guys shortly!” Gem exaggerated her customer service voice and gave them a sarcastic smile before turning on her heel and walking towards the counter.

She reappeared a few minutes later, precariously balancing everything on a tray. Skizz kept arguing with Scar and Grian as he passed the drinks and food out to everyone. Impulse hadn’t been paying attention, just letting their friendly bickering float right over his head.

“Thanks, Gem!” Impulse called to Gem as she walked away. She stuck her thumb in the air in response, inciting a chuckle out of him.

Impulse turned back to the group, who kept bickering as they ate and drank. He was happy to just listen to them talk, covering every topic from calculus to video games to pop culture. He laughed along as Scar started to rant about Disney, and Grian buried his head in his hands with a groan. He laughed harder when Skizz mispronounced a word and Grian and Scar cackled at the inappropriate sentence it turned into. Overall, he was just happy to sit there and watch his friends mess around.

…

“Come on, Scar, my dad’s here. Merry Christmas, everyone!” Grian dragged Scar by the wrist, waving to all of them as they walked out the door.

“Goodbye, everybody! Merry Christmas!” Scar’s voice faded out as he vanished outside.

Impulse turned back to see Skizz looking him up and down, then immediately snapping his gaze to Impulse’s eyes. “Want a ride?” Skizz mused, raising his eyebrows.

“You don’t have to ask anymore.” Impulse smirked and headed towards the door, while Skizz just stood there. He reminded Impulse of Scar, how he would just stand there and act dumbfounded until Grian dragged him away. Impulse always noted the small grin on his face when Grian finally grabbed him by the hand. Summoning every shred of courage, he stalked back over and took Skizz by the hand, dragging him outside. As the polar blast outside hit him, he relished in the warmth of Skizz’s rough hand, pulling him along with little resistance. 

Impulse melted into the warmth, distracting him from the feeling of his nose turning pink and his tail freezing up. A shudder went through his body, and he couldn’t tell if it came from the cold or the feeling of Skizz’s hand in his.

“Impy Dimpy, are you seeing this?” 

Impulse snapped out of his daydream to see Skizz gesturing at the sky. Little flurries of snow were falling, coating the ground in what looked like white dust. Impulse looked over at Skizz, who had a snowflake on his nose. He laughed as Skizz tried to lick it away, unable to reach the white particle. Skizz looked back at him, smiling somewhat bashfully. Impulse looked away, feeling his face flush pinker. It was definitely because of the cold.

They both hopped into the car, breathing hard into their hands to warm up. Skizz put the car into drive and took off, winding through the roads. Impulse just zoned out, thinking about how happy he was that it was winter break. He thought about being able to stay home for three weeks, hunkered down in his room, avoiding all social interaction. His mood was dampened slightly when he remembered that he wouldn’t be seeing Skizz for the entire holiday.

“Woah, look!” 

Impulse was snapped out of it yet again as Skizz stopped the car outside a park. Looking outside, Impulse saw that the snow was in full swing, snowflakes drifting down in droves and gathering on the grass. Looking over at Skizz, he saw the glee on the angel’s face.

“I didn’t know it snowed here!” Skizz clapped his hands excitedly.

“It doesn’t usually, it hasn’t snowed here for a few years.” Impulse sighed internally. He already didn’t handle cold well, even when it wasn’t snowing. He was definitely going to burrow into his bed for the entire break.

“Come on, come on, let’s go play!” Skizz sounded like a kid on Christmas, a huge, cheesy grin plastered across his face as he flashed puppy eyes at Impulse. Typically, he would say no, but something about Skizz’s expression made it impossible to say no.

“Let’s go then!” Impulse wound his scarf tighter around his neck, zipping his jacket to the top and jumping out of the car.

Skizz ran to the centre of the park, flopping down on his back in the centre of the big, snowy pile. Impulse followed, lying down with a gasp as the cold seeped into him. He looked over at Skizz, having the time of his life, waving his arms and legs back and forth. Impulse joined him, albeit moving much more stiffly as he felt his muscles solidify.

Skizz hopped to his feet, smiling down at his handiwork and then at Impulse. Sticking out his hand, he gestured for Impulse to take it. Impulse obliged, feeling himself get pulled to his feet and into Skizz’s arms. Stumbling slightly, he looked up at Skizz, who looked back at him with a grin.

“Hey, buddy!” He chirped, not letting go of Impulse.

“Hi,” Impulse could feel his face getting redder by the second.

Skizz let him go, walking a little further away. He bent down slightly, picking up a handful of snow and balling it up. Impulse saw the snowball hurtling towards him within the second, whipping his head to the side so he didn’t get smashed in the face. 

“Who are you, Neo?!” Skizz groaned as he charged up another snowball, getting ready to fling it at Impulse.

Impulse dodged again, hearing it whistle past his head. He balled up some snow and launched it at Skizz, hitting him square in the shoulder. “Ooooh, gotta be quicker than that!” He chirped with glee as Skizz threw his hands in the air in frustration.

“Shut up!” Skizz hurled another snowball, this time hitting Impulse on the side of the head. 

“Yeah, baby!” He shrieked, as Impulse tenderly rubbed the side of his head. Impulse kept his head down, hiding the giant snowball behind him.

“Woah, are you okay? Did I hurt you?” Impulse heard Skizz quickly walk over, waiting until he was close to strike. 

“Impy Dimpy?” Skizz sounded genuinely concerned, and Impulse felt a bit bad about what he was about to do.

Turning towards Skizz, he heaved the giant snowball directly into his face, knocking him backwards. He squealed in delight as Skizz hit the floor, blinking snow out of his eyes confusedly.

“You’re the worst!” Skizz huffed, getting to his feet and reaching down for another snowball. He launched it at Impulse, but missed by a mile. 

Impulse giggled, running in circles as Skizz kept flinging snowballs at him. He stopped briefly to throw another snowball, this time hitting Skizz in the stomach. 

“Enough out of you!” Skizz charged at Impulse, tackling him into a mound of snow. Impulse felt his muscles seize up, unable to move because of the snow surrounding him. Skizz cackled as he got up, holding out his hand to help Impulse to his feet. Impulse couldn’t lift his arm up, completely paralyzed by the cold.

“Hey, hey, are you okay?” Skizz looked concerned, bending down to Impulse’s level.

“Too…cold,” Impulse’s teeth chattered as he tried to wrap his scarf around himself tighter.

“Oh, shit !” Skizz wrapped his arms around Impulse, lifting him to his feet. Impulse wrapped his arm around Skizz’s waist, leaning into his shoulder while struggling for breath. Skizz’s arms hold him tight, guiding him to the car. Despite barely being able to breathe, Impulse felt like he could stay that way forever. Wrapped in his arms, feeling Skizz’s warmth seep into his bones. 

Skizz moved his arm to open the door, and gently placed Impulse down on the seat before shutting the door and running to the driver’s side. Jumping in, he slammed his door and cranked the heating in the car. Impulse felt his bodily functions return to normal, finally able to breathe properly and move his fingers again. He looked over at Skizz, whose blue eyes were wide with fright.

“I’m okay-y.” Impulse stuttered slightly, his teeth still chattering. “Being a demon hybrid means I don’t handle the cold well. Freezes up my muscles and stuff.”

“Understood. That was scary, man!” Skizz still looked concerned, but the tension released from his face slightly when he saw that it wasn’t more serious.

“Yeah, I was pushing my luck a bit there.” Impulse shrugged, finally feeling the heat blasting from the car.

“Be more careful next time!” Skizz furrowed his brows, looking at Impulse agitatedly. “Take better care of yourself, man!”

“Yeah, yeah.” Impulse groaned, not needing another lecture on how he needed to take better care of himself. He already got enough of those from Zed.

Skizz just sighed, putting the car into drive and heading off. Impulse looked out the window at the snowfall, coming down much heavier than it was before. He glanced at Skizz, who was focused on navigating them both home in this weather. Impulse took note of the faint scars on his face and arms, and the way his hair curled slightly at the ends. He noticed the way Skizz’s eyes crinkled at the edges, and the way he rubbed his nose like he was about to sneeze. 

“See something you like?” Skizz smirked, snapping Impulse out of his daydream.

“Might do, what about it?” The words escaped Impulse’s mouth without him realising, and he watched as Skizz turned a deep crimson, looking away with a smile.

Impulse felt the car slow and then stop, and saw that they had reached his house. He looked over at Skizz, who was eyeing him up and down. Impulse looked into his eyes, unable to figure out what Skizz was playing at. 

“Thanks for the ride, Skizz. Merry Christmas.” Impulse pushed the door open, ready to sprint to his front door to escape the cold.

“Merry Christmas, Impy Dimpy.” Skizz waved goodbye, and Impulse heard the car screech away against the snowy ground.

Pushing the door to his house open, Impulse basked in the warmth of his house, a warm welcome from the blistering cold outside. Walking up to his room, he acknowledged the warm, fuzzy feeling in his stomach, and the slight flutter of butterflies that made him smile wider than he had in a while.

Chapter Text

The old Impulse would have groaned loudly and slammed his tail on the alarm clock to shut it up while it blared in his ears. The old Impulse would have contemplated his life choices and how they led to him having to leave his warm bed at seven am. The old Impulse would have had a borderline panic attack over having to go back to school after winter break.

But instead, this Impulse got out of bed with a smile and pulled on a comfortable outfit. He strolled into the bathroom to vigorously brush his teeth and tried to comb through his bedhead with his claws. He ate his favourite cereal for breakfast and realised he had almost half an hour to spare before he had to get the bus. He decided to slump onto the couch to scroll through some video reels on his communicator. 

As eight am neared, he felt the anxiety start to gnaw at him slightly. The thought of having to reenter an environment where he felt eyes on him at all times made the nerves bubble gently in his stomach. But he felt nowhere near as crippled as he did just four months prior. Somehow, in some way, he had the strength to make it through each day with much more positivity than he had previously. While he still fell victim to the burning sensation of eyes on him, it was much more manageable. The only thing he didn’t understand was why.

At least he would get to see Skizz today. Skizz had wanted to hang out with him over the three-week break, but they had both had family trips at different times, and then Skizz had gotten the flu in the final week of the break. Safe to say, the universe had not been on their side. 

But it was okay. They had calculus together first period, and Impulse would finally be able to talk to Skizz properly instead of just through the communicator. He felt his stomach flutter slightly at the prospect of being with Skizz again. Rubbing his stomach confusedly, Impulse deduced that he was definitely just nervous about going back to school.

The time ticked over to eight am, and Impulse slung his bag over his shoulder and pulled on his headphones. Skizz had convinced him to start listening to more Green Day, so he let the soothing acoustics of Good Riddance fill his ears as he boarded the bus to school.

…

“Well hello there, Impulse!”

Impulse looked up to see Scar smiling brightly at him, while Grian waved excitedly.

“Hey, guys! How was your break?” Impulse sat down, dropping his bag on the floor with a loud thunk. He cringed slightly and looked around, but relaxed once he saw no one was paying attention.

“It was awesome, dude! Scar’s parents took us and Mumbo on a trip up the ski slopes!” Grian chattered happily while Scar just looked at him with a big smile on his face.

“That’s so cool! Your parents are so generous, Scar!” Impulse wished he had friends that he could go on overnight trips with. He had always wanted to go on a camping trip at the end of the school year with a big friend group, but his anxiety had held him back from actually joining a big friend group.

“Oh, thanks!” Scar seemed confused at the praise, but accepted it with a grin nonetheless.

“Hello everybody!” 

The three of them turned to see Skizz standing in the doorway, a grin engulfing his face. Impulse could tell that he had cut his hair - it wasn’t completely obscuring his face anymore, but instead flopped to the left slightly, curling at the ends. Skizz’s blue-eyed gaze quickly flitted over to Impulse before he looked away again. Impulse could have sworn Skizz turned slightly pink as he walked towards them from across the room. Whatever the reason, it wasn’t Impulse’s business. He wasn’t going to overthink it.

“How’ve you been, Skizzy?” Scar stood up, wobbling slightly, to hug Skizz.

“Good! Was just sick though, which sucked butt.” Skizz reciprocated the hug, then frowned as he sat down.

“Oh, that sucks dude.” Grian shot Skizz a look of sympathy before going back to tapping on his communicator.

“Yeah. How are you, Impy Dimpy?” Skizz put his hand on Impulse’s shoulder, looking off to the side instead of making direct eye contact. Impulse thought that was quite unlike him.

“I’m doing good, Skizz.” Impulse tried to move his head downwards in an awkward attempt to initiate eye contact with Skizz.

Skizz looked up slightly, brows furrowed with worry. Impulse had no idea what had happened to him, but he seemed much more riddled with anxiety than he had before. Maybe they had pulled a Freaky Friday without realising.

“Stop making goo-goo eyes at each other.” Grian quipped, not even looking up from his communicator.

“How do you know we were looking at each other?!” Skizz crossed his arms, an indignant expression on his face.

“I just do.”

“What are you even doing on that thing?! Antisocial much?!”

“Fishing game.” Grian whipped his screen around to show them a heavily pixelated game, with Grian’s bearded character fishing off a dock. Impulse could see a lighthouse facing the dock, with what appeared to be fish swimming in the air around it.

“Why are you playing a game about fishing?” Scar looked confusedly at the screen, examining it closely.

“Trying to get an enchanted book. It’s one of the most important pieces of loot in the game.”

“Well, how have you been doing so far?” Impulse didn’t quite understand what the hype was.

“Six thousand fish so far, lots of books, but not the book.” Grian sounded utterly defeated.

“That’s insane! Time to give up, man.” Impulse was gobsmacked at how many hours Grian must have committed to this game.

“It’s the next book, dude.” Grian tried to cheer up slightly.

“It’s always the next book, bro,” Skizz smirked slightly at Grian, clearly amused by this whole situation.

Before Grian could fire back a response, Mr Masu walked in, purposefully striding towards his desk. The quiet hum of chatter immediately stalled, and a fearful atmosphere enveloped the room. Impulse was so sick of this teacher and his use of fear to command attention. If he were a good teacher, then it would be acceptable, but he was pretty useless.

“Good job on being silent, everyone. It tends to be a rarity in this class.” Mr Masu gave a pointed look to Impulse and his friends perched in the back. Impulse flushed from embarrassment, but looked over to Skizz for comfort. He was happy to see that Skizz had his arms crossed and was scowling darkly at the teacher, along with Grian, who looked even more disgusted than Skizz.

“This guy sucks,” Skizz whispered, careful to maintain eye contact with the front of the class.

“Seriously,” Grian whispered back, not even bothering to keep his eyes on the board.

Scar just rolled his eyes as Mr Masu kept scribbling something incoherent on the blackboard, who then turned around and faced the class expectantly.

“Well, get to it!” He stormed to his desk and sat down with a huff, opening up his folder and looking over the pages.

A quiet hum of confusion resumed as other students tried deciphering the blackboard scrawl. 

“It says ‘group project - duos’, guys.” 

Impulse turned to look at Grian in shock as the avian pushed his glasses up his nose slightly.

“Okay, I know glasses make your eyesight better, but there’s no way your vision is that good, dude.” Skizz was completely disbelieving, opting to pull out his communicator to snap a photo of the board instead of squinting.

“These are purely cosmetic. I’m literally a parrot, we have excellent vision dude.” Grian acted like that was an obvious fact, and Impulse cringed slightly at how dumb he must seem.

“What the?!” Skizz looked like he was about to have an aneurysm from confusion. “Scar, is he pulling our leg?”

“No, he’s being truthful. Quite the interesting fellow, isn’t he?” Scar didn’t even look up from his notebook, scribbling away from the photo Skizz took of the board.

Impulse and Skizz looked at Grian in disbelief, who just shrugged and flared his wings out slightly. He smirked before saying, “Pesky bird physically and mentally.”

“Whatever, man.” Skizz looked away, back towards the board. He leaned over slightly to peek at Scar’s neat notes before recentering himself in his seat.

“What does it say, Skizz? I can’t read it from here.” Impulse leaned closer to Skizz in a feeble attempt to read Scar’s book. His chair tipped, and he ended up almost sprawled on the floor, had he not caught himself. He was inches from Skizz’s face, so close he could feel his warm breath and see the slightly chapped skin on Skizz’s lips.

Impulse sat up properly, but not before he noticed the weirdly flustered look on Skizz’s face. His wings were tensed slightly to accompany his pink expression. Impulse had no idea what was up with him today. “Are you okay, dude? Sorry I almost fell on you.”

“Oh, yeah, I’m fine, sorry.” Skizz righted himself and cleared his throat before telling Impulse what the board said. “It just says that we have to do a project in pairs, where we design a roller coaster based on physics principles. We also have to…” 

Impulse looked past Skizz to see Grian and Scar sniggering about something in the background, with occasional quick glances and gestures towards Skizz. Impulse leaned back slightly to see that Skizz’s wings were as stiff as a board and feathers extremely ruffled. Weird. He hadn’t noticed the messy feathers when Skizz had walked in. Maybe he just hadn’t had time to preen recently? He had been sick after all.

“...Yeah, that’s it.” Skizz finished reading the instructions, and Impulse quickly snapped his attention back towards the angel. In all honesty, he hadn’t been listening. All he paid attention to was that the project was to be done in duos.

“Wanna partner up with me, Skizz?” Impulse knew that Scar and Grian would probably want to do it together, what with the oddly flirtatious friendship those two had and all.

Skizz seemed slightly taken aback, and Impulse felt a pit in his stomach, fearful of whether he had been too forward. Impulse watched as Skizz composed himself slightly, before nodding his head yes. “Yeah, that’ll be fun, Impy Dimpy!”

“Great!” Impulse turned back towards the front, excited at the prospect of being able to work on this project with Skizz by his side.

…

Impulse let out a colossal yawn as he pushed open the door to the music room. He didn’t think he would ever get used to the early morning wake-ups that came with school.

“Hey, Baby!” Bdubs skipped over to Impulse, enthusiastically flinging his arms around him. Impulse awkwardly hugged the shorter boy, feeling a bit suffocated by all the physical touch.

“Heyyyyy Impulse!” Etho waved from his keyboard, before turning back to the machine and fiddling with it frustratedly.

“Hi, guys!” Impulse smiled at them both, just happy they seemed excited to see him. “How’ve you been-.”

Impulse was cut off by Skizz launching himself into the room. He was breathing hard, and his wings were twitching violently. 

“Judas priest! What is happening?!” Bdubs raced to his cousin’s side, concern etched into his face. Etho also looked up from his corner with a confused expression.

“I’m…fine.” Skizz sucked all his air in, and continued rapidly. “I was walking towards this room, and I saw Tango up ahead of me. I was about to call out to the guy, but you’ll never guess what I saw.”

Skizz paused, grinning at the suspense he was keeping them all in.

“Spit it out!” Bdubs growled, shaking Skizz vigorously. 

“He was with Jimmy, guys! You know, the hallway crush he’s had for like, ever ! And they were holding hands, and I think Tango was about to bring him here!” Skizz stood up straighter, a big smile on his face. 

“No way!” Impulse could hardly tell what Etho’s expression was behind the mask, but based on his chipper voice, he could only assume it was a smile that matched Skizz’s. 

“That’s amazing!” Bdubs was also overjoyed, doing a small jump on the spot. 

Skizz beamed widely, but then added, “It’s awesome! But, I did sprint the other way to get here so I could tell you guys, so I have a feeling they’re walking through this door any minute.”

As if on cue, the door handle jiggled slightly, and all of them sprinted to their various positions in the room. Impulse ended up in the back corner with Etho, and could hear him breathing heavily as Tango entered the room, hand in hand with a blond canary Impulse could only assume was Jimmy.

“Oh, snappers,” Etho muttered quietly so that only Impulse could hear. Impulse felt a laugh bubbling in his throat, but tried his best to stifle it so he wouldn’t cause a scene.

“Hey guys! This is Jimmy!” Tango squeezed Jimmy’s arm. “I’ve brought him to watch us play today, I hope that’s alright with you guys?”

The rest of them all looked at each other, trying not to smile. 

“Yeah, yeah, yeah!” Skizz was the first to speak, smiling widely at Jimmy and sticking his hand out. “Nice to meet you, I’m Skizz!” Skizz then introduced all of them, and Impulse gave a small wave when Skizz announced his name. He turned back around to his tech, not noticing how Skizz blushed and looked away afterwards.

“Hey, everyone! I hope I’m not intruding!” Jimmy had a cheerful voice, with a hint of uncertainty in his words.

“Of course not, baby!” Bdubs shot his award-winning grin at Jimmy, who gratefully returned the smile. “Anyway, let’s get a move on, everyone! Jimmy, come sit here.” Bdubs gestured to a chair at the side of the room, which Jimmy promptly sat down in.

Impulse noted how the canary shuffled his feet awkwardly, and how his ear wings flapped swiftly. Impulse had been just like him not too long ago. Anxious about meeting everyone and what they would expect of him. What Jimmy didn’t know yet was that everyone here was the most welcoming people Impulse had ever met, and he hoped Jimmy would soon understand the same. Jimmy looked around rapidly, gaze quickly flashing to Impulse. He shot Jimmy a sympathetic smile, which Jimmy seemed to recognise the meaning of. 

Impulse thought back to when Skizz had introduced him to everyone not too long ago, and how scared he had been then as well. It seemed like years ago that he had been such a nervous trainwreck, but it was only a few months. Impulse was proud of himself for handling everything so well, even though he still didn’t understand what switch had flipped in his brain.

“Okay, I’m ready now!” Skizz was sitting at his drums, twirling the sticks between his fingers absentmindedly. Impulse headed into his tech booth, looking out at the band from his bench. Bdubs at the front microphone, pressing the on button. Tango and his electric guitar, but all he was focused on was Jimmy’s eager expression. Etho stood at his keyboard, glance switching between the floor and Bdubs. And Skizz, who was looking at…him?

Skizz’s eyes were locked on Impulse, trailing over him with a tender expression. Impulse looked back at Skizz, noting the angel’s deep blue eyes and pink cheeks. Skizz looked up at Impulse and smiled diffidently before looking towards the front.

Impulse really did not understand what Skizz’s new deal was. The guy was the most confident person he had ever met, and would speak his mind and be completely honest no matter what. Now, he was shying away whenever Impulse so much as looked at him, and always seemed to be flushed in his presence. It made no sense.

Impulse snapped back to reality as Bdubs counted all of them in, projecting his voice loudly into the room. “One, two, a one, two, three, four!”

…

“You guys are amazing!” Jimmy cheered from the side as they finished up their last song of the practice. He stood up and bounced over to Tango, flinging his arms around the blaze. Tango reciprocated the hug, fiery ends of his hair flickering excitedly. Jimmy backed up slightly, looking at Tango with wide, thrilled brown eyes.

“Okay, wrap it up, lovebirds.” Skizz grinned at the pair, who promptly backed away from each other while blushing crimson.

“Seriously, though, you guys were great! Why don’t you do a performance or something?” Jimmy moved closer to Tango, looking at him questioningly.

“Never been offered a spot, unfortunately.” Tango wrapped his arm around Jimmy’s waist and looked at the blond fondly.

“That’s not true, actually!”

All of them turned to look at Bdubs, who was practically shaking with excitement. “You know how I dipped out for a moment during our break?”

All of them nodded rapidly.

“Well, we’ve actually been offered a spot in the SPRING FESTIVAL!” Bdubs screamed those last two words, cheering loudly.

The others hollered with excitement, delighted at the opportunity for them to show off their skills. Impulse shrank into himself, worried at the idea of being on stage at their town’s festival. It was one of the biggest events of the year, the turnout was usually in the thousands. Impulse felt his stomach turn at the thought of being noticed, being perceived by that many people.

But looking around at everyone’s excited faces, the way Skizz was wrapping everyone in bear hugs from glee, made him realise that doing this would be worth it. A little exposure therapy couldn’t hurt him anyway.

Once the cheering died down, Bdubs motioned for them all to listen. “Guys, we need to start practising more. It might be in two months, but this is our chance to finally get on more people’s radar. It has to be perfect. ” Bdubs began to ramble quickly at the end, and Impulse could hear his breathing quickening.

“Woah, breathe, Bdubs.” Etho pulled Bdubs close, allowing the shorter boy to bury his head in his shoulder.

Impulse just seemed to be third-wheeling everyone today. From Tango and Jimmy clearly being on the cusp of dating if they weren’t already, to Etho and Bdubs being more romantic than usual, Impulse didn’t know what to make of all the couples popping up. Who knows, maybe he would be the next victim! That would be awful, though. Impulse has always known that he was far too uncertain to be in a relationship. He wasn’t emotionally stable enough not to spiral over every little thing.

“In that case, I’m gonna stick around a bit longer to sharpen up my drumming!” Skizz chirped happily, but a look of confusion and disgust was on Tango’s face.

“Yeah, no. We’re going home,” Tango gestured to himself and Jimmy, before marching out the door and yelling farewells through it.

“Whatever, lovebirds,” Etho’s mutterings found their way to Impulse’s ears, and he doubled over with laughter.

“Yeah, what in Void’s name is going on with those two?!” Bdubs seemed simultaneously outraged and intrigued.

“I don’t know, man! But he didn’t tell me!” Skizz pouted, crossing his arms like an upset toddler.

“They’re cute, though.” Impulse chimed in nervously, worried about going against the group consensus.

Skizz smiled over at Impulse and nodded assent. “Yeah, did you guys see the way they were looking at each other? Sickeningly cute.”

“I did. Disgusting.” Etho motioned as though he were about to barf. “Love Tango though, I’m happy for him.”

“Me too. It’s about time someone tied him down.” Bdubs grinned and grabbed Etho by the arm. “Come on, we’re leaving too.”

Etho waved goodbye as Bdubs walked him out the door like a dog. Impulse chuckled, still not fully understanding whether their dynamic was platonic or romantic. He looked over at Skizz, who was also laughing, but turned towards Impulse.

“Do you mind waiting for another twenty minutes so I can give you a ride? I just need to sharpen up a bit.” Skizz rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly.

“Yeah, that’s fine. It’s too cold for me to walk anyway, I have no choice to be honest.”

“Cool! We don’t want a repeat of last time anyway.” Skizz smiled awkwardly, and Impulse cringed as he remembered how the cold had paralysed him on the last day of the semester. Despite not recovering from that for a couple of days, he still smiled whenever he remembered the fun they had. 

Impulse realised too late that he hadn’t responded to Skizz and had just looked awkward. Now Skizz was probably feeling bad for overstepping, even though Impulse hadn’t been offended.

As expected, Skizz looked slightly guilty and was also shifting in place. “I’ll be right back dude, I need to piss before I practice more.” He promptly walked out the door, leaving Impulse to his own devices in the empty music room.

Impulse felt bad for making Skizz think he was being offensive. He truly wasn’t. Impulse just got too caught up in his own head about how he must have looked on that day. 

And now he had to entertain himself for the next five minutes. Flicking open his communicator, he saw that the stupid thing’s battery had died. Closing it with frustration, he looked around the room for something to keep him occupied. 

His eyes landed on the drums, and he perked up. He hadn’t been to his lessons in a while because of how busy he’d been, and then it was winter break, and his tutor went away. He had been itching for a chance to play the drums again. Surely Skizz wouldn’t be back before he finished this song anyway?

Impulse sat down at the drums, tapping them to ease himself into the beat of his favourite song. He picked up the pace slightly as the song progressed, getting more and more intense as he mumbled the lyrics to himself. He found himself completely in his own world, allowing the rhythm to consume him as he hit the cymbals to end the song. That felt exactly how he thought it would: cathartic. Despite being quite a reserved person, something about playing an instrument as loudly as possible heals his soul.

Impulse got up, only to see that Skizz was staring at him with an open mouth and wide eyes. Impulse froze up, feeling like a deer in the headlights. 

The two just stared at each other, neither one speaking. Impulse didn’t know what to do. He wasn’t sure if Skizz was upset that he used the drums, or in shock that he did, or what was going on.

“Since when could you drum so good?!” Skizz borderline yelled, gesturing wildly at Impulse and to the drums.

“I’ve always been able to play, I just don’t usually.” Impulse didn’t get what was so shocking about having a hidden talent. He wasn’t that good at drumming anyway.

“Okay, fair. But you are insanely good! Like, I have never heard someone play that well before.” Skizz was gushing, words spilling from his lips rapidly. 

“Thanks, Skizz. I’m really not that good, though.” Impulse could feel himself blushing from embarrassment at this praise, he needed to deflect so he didn’t become a tomato. 

“Would you stop it!” Skizz had a determined and indignant look on his face. “You’re so good at drumming, and you’re so good at calculus, and you’re so kind and so humble, and you don’t have enough faith in yourself, Impy Dimpy!”

Impulse was taken aback at the onslaught of compliments. He already didn’t know how to respond to one compliment, but that many at once completely crippled him. He felt himself turning redder by the second, and his hands were becoming more and more clammy.

Skizz just smirked, his confidence seemingly coming back to him after being somewhat  all day. “Now you’re just standing there, all cute and flustered, why would I not compliment you, buddy?”

Was Impulse dreaming? Was he having some weird hallucination where Skizz was… flirting? But that would be insane; he and Skizz were just friends. 

But as Impulse looked closer at Skizz, the mischievous glint in his eye and the way his lip quivered slightly from nerves told him otherwise. He just couldn’t understand what had possessed Skizz to act like this. Maybe he was just feeling left out because of all the couples forming recently. Regardless, Impulse was embarrassed at how flustered he had become.

Impulse opted for saying, “You’re such a weirdo,” and whipping his tail at him before plonking himself down on a chair while Skizz sat at his drums, still grinning devilishly. 

Impulse watched as Skizz got into the zone, practising one of the tougher sections of a song they had all been struggling with. Impulse noticed how Skizz’s brow was furrowed slightly, and his muscles were flexed as he slammed the drumsticks onto the drums. Wait, why was he noticing that? Skizz’s stupid compliments had thrown him all out of whack.

Impulse tried his best to ignore how the butterflies in his stomach fluttered harder and harder the longer he watched Skizz play. But despite his best attempts, he couldn’t ignore that Skizz was kind of attractive when he was focused like that. 

Skizz looked up at Impulse and smiled, but it was a different smile than his usual cheesy grin. It was nervous, hopeful, unsure even. Why would he be unsure? When had Skizz ever been unsure about anything?

Impulse didn’t know what was up with him. But hey, whatever Skizz had going on didn’t change the fact that Impulse was thoroughly enjoying watching him play those drums.

Chapter Text

“Bdouble-down! What’s up, buddy!” Skizz leaned over to clap Bdubs on the back as he got in the car.

“I am amazing!” Bdubs shot his award-winning smile at Skizz. “What about you, baby!”

Skizz put the car into drive and set off down the road before replying. “I’m pretty good! Impy Dimpy and I are hanging out after school for our calc project!”

“Aw! That’s sweet,” Bdubs kept his mouth open as though he were about to say something else, but promptly closed it.

Bdubs’s hesitancy was not lost on Skizz, and he raised one eyebrow at Bdubs. “What’s on your mind, man?”

“Nothing!” Bdubs blurted, but his cheeks reddened slightly. 

What was this guy playing at? Skizz narrowed his eyes, “Spit it out. I won’t be upset, I just don’t like that you’re clearly hiding something from me.” Skizz tried to make his tone sound firm, but still gentle.

Bdubs sighed, and Skizz saw in his peripheral vision that Bdubs turned to look at him. 

“Do you have a crush on Impulse?”

Skizz felt his body go rigid, and his face instantly warmed. His heart was racing, and he gripped the steering wheel tightly as he tried to think of something to say. Was it really that obvious?

“Oh. My. Void!” Bdubs sounded shocked, and also excited. “You do like him!”

Skizz was sputtering, trying to think of any counterargument. Nothing came to him. He was well and truly rumbled. 

“Woah, Skizz, are you okay?” Bdubs put his hand on Skizz’s, trying to calm him down. Skizz jerked the wheel to the left, sliding into a parking spot. He looked at Bdubs shamefully, and no words came to him for the first time in his life.

“It’s okay, we don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to.” Bdubs ran his hand up and down Skizz’s arm. “I know it’s a touchy subject.”

Skizz shuddered as he understood what Bdubs was implying. He looked over to Bdubs, whose wide eyes were filled with concern and guilt. “It’s not…” Skizz took a deep breath as he tried to push his past from his brain. “It’s not about all that. I’ve fully accepted who I am.” Skizz was trying to convince himself of that, that it was okay if he did have a crush on Impulse. As much as he wanted to believe that it was okay for him to be gay, he wasn’t sure if the voices in his head would let him.

“It’s okay if you haven’t.” Bdubs's voice was gentle and understanding, which was exactly what Skizz needed. “I was just wondering, because you seem to talk about him a lot, and I’ve noticed that you act a bit different around him compared to the rest of us.”

Skizz paused and acknowledged what Bdubs was saying. He had been feeling differently about Impulse recently, more anxious and reserved than his usual boisterous self. He felt warmer when Impulse was around and more giggly than usual. And there was the knot in his stomach that never seemed to untie. Oh Void, he did have a crush on Impulse.

Skizz groaned loudly into his hands, extracting a small giggle from Bdubs. Looking through the gap in his fingers, he saw Bdubs' smiling face. “What do I do, bro?”

“Just tell him.” Bdubs didn’t even miss a beat, and Skizz immediately recoiled. 

“What if he doesn’t like me back?! I would have ruined our friendship!” Skizz could feel himself starting to spiral.

“Not a possibility. I’ve seen the way he looks at you, Skizz.” Bdubs crossed his arms and sat back, a look of certainty on his face. 

“Well, what about you and Etho?!” Skizz needed to deflect before Bdubs convinced him to do something stupid. “You guys have been complete wet cats around each other for months!” 

“Well, actually…” Bdubs trailed off, fidgeting nervously. Skizz could feel the synchronised apprehension and excitement emanating from Bdubs, and the dots clicked in his head. 

“Why didn’t you tell me?!” Skizz hollered, shaking Bdubs by the shoulder.

Bdubs let himself get shaken like a ragdoll before breaking away, smiling like a maniac. “We just wanted a bit of time to ourselves to figure everything out. Being friends since we were five and then confessing that we were in love was a bit jarring.” Bdubs looked like he was on cloud nine. 

Skizz could understand that part, at least. Realising you have feelings but being scared of the change they will cause was practically his life story. “Fair enough, man. How long has it been?”

Bdubs perked back up, clearly glad that Skizz wasn’t angry. “Only a couple of weeks, we confessed the day before Christmas and then kissed for the first time on New Year's.” Bdubs beamed, and Skizz could feel the love practically radiating off of him.

“I’m happy for you, dude, truly.” Skizz smiled at his cousin, who smiled back before a firmer look replaced it. 

“Thanks, baby! Now, what are you going to do about Impulse?”

Skizz groaned for the second time in the past two minutes and put his head on the steering wheel. “I don’t know, dude, he gets so anxious so easily, and I really don’t want to stress him out.” 

Bdubs contemplated for a moment before speaking. “Fair, but I’m being serious when I say that he definitely feels the same way. I can see it in his eyes.”

“Okay, okay, okay!” Skizz had accepted that there was no way out of this other than being honest. “I’ll tell him after we hang out today.” 

Bdubs cheered, and Skizz sighed, putting the car back into drive and continuing to school. This was going to be the death of him.

…

“See you later, Skizz!” Impulse waved from the door, and Skizz felt his stomach twist slightly while he smiled brightly back.

He waited a few moments before heading out the door himself, unsure if he would be able to act normal around Impulse for much longer. He looked up and down the hallway, seeing no trace of the demon. With a sigh of relief, he continued to his next class.

Since the conversation with Bdubs that morning, he had been paranoid about how he was acting around Impulse for the entire calculus lesson. Every time Impulse smiled, laughed, or so much as talked to him, he felt the butterflies ravage his stomach and render him a stuttering mess. 

This wasn’t who he wanted to be. While realising that he had a crush on Impulse explained the weird feeling he had been having since that snowball fight before winter break, it was becoming detrimental to their friendship. All Skizz wanted to do was talk to Impulse without feeling like he had lost all his confidence. 

This wasn’t good enough. He had to just ignore his feelings until later, and act like he had when he and Impulse first met. 

“Skizzly?”

The calling of his name penetrated his overthinking, and he looked up, blinking hard to clear his fuzzy vision. He saw Pearl and Gem standing before him, smiling as wide as ever. Looking down slightly, he saw that their fingers were interlocked, and Gem was rubbing her thumb over Pearl’s wrist.

“Hey, guuuuys!” Skizz put on a sing-songy voice and made a show of looking at their hands. “When did this happen?”

They both flushed and turned to each other, smiles bright and eyes twinkling. Skizz could feel the joy they felt, and it helped him calm the raging nerves in his body.

“Since New Year's.” Gem grinned as Pearl buried her head in Gem’s shoulder. “Pearl and I were just hanging out by the lake because everyone was off trying to look for someone to kiss, and then we may or may not have ended up kissing each other…” Gem trailed off and looked up at Pearl, who was smirking.

“Turns out that Gem couldn’t wait until midnight.” Pearl sniggered as Gem slapped her across the arm, blushed wildly.

“It’s not my fault that you wouldn’t stop staring at my lips! Truly, what is a girl to do?!” Gem crossed her arms, staring at Pearl with fond frustration on her face.

Skizz laughed at the pair, who were now bickering over who initiated what. Skizz couldn’t help but feel a twinge of regret at missing the New Year's party due to being on holiday. While he was glad to visit his family, everything we had heard just made the pit in his stomach bigger and bigger. All he wanted from his high school experience was one decent party, where he could make the rounds and talk to all the people he cared about without having to think about anything else. Obviously, he threw a party on Halloween, but the stress that resulted from that was enough to never want to host again. 

He zoned back in, seeing Gem impatiently snapping her fingers in front of his face. “Earth to Skizz, what is up with you today?”

Skizz shook his head, trying to stop the overthinking from consuming him. “Sorry, Gemmy, I’m a bit exhausted today.”

“It’s okay,” She sighed and looked at him kindly. “What’re you doing later? Wait, let me guess! Band practice!”

Skizz grinned as she stared at him intently, convinced that she was right. “Usually, you would be correct! But Etho and Tango have a trip for the engineering club, so we cancelled practice.”

“Oh.” 

Gem and Pearl both looked dejected, but Skizz couldn’t figure out why. “What’s up? Why do you sound so sad about that?”

Pearl and Gem looked at each other shyly before Pearl spoke. “We just wanted to watch you guys, Jimmy said you were really good.”

Skizz felt his heart swell with pride. The thought of two people he wasn’t close with wanting to watch him perform because they believed he was good warmed his heart. “Awwwww!” Skizz couldn’t help it; he reached out for both of them and tugged them in for a tight hug. They squirmed a bit, shouting objections, but eventually accepted the embrace. 

“Can you let us out now? I’m being squished like a bug.” He felt Gem’s muffled words against his chest and released them obligingly.

“You never answered us; what are you doing after school?” Pearl straightened out her clothes and put her arm around Gem’s shoulders. “Maybe we can all hang out?”

Skizz was feeling so welcomed today. He already felt completely happy at this school, but they just kept making his day better and better. He felt a bit regretful at being busy, but honestly, he would rather spend time with Impulse. “Sorry guys, Impulse and I have a calc project to work on.” 

The two shared a quick glance, mischievous smiles creeping onto their faces. “Of course you’re with Impulse ,” Gem sniggered as she enunciated Impulse’s name, before making an array of kissing noises.

“Yeah, save time for people other than your boyfriend, Skizz.” Peal began to make similar noises to Gem, leading to both of them dissolving into giggles.

“What the- we’re not even dating!” Skizz sputtered, trying to find a way to deflect and escape this embarrassment.

“Oh, so you do like him then?” Gem crossed her arms, smirking evilly.

Skizz couldn’t believe how horrendously he had been rumbled today. It was like suddenly his crush on Impulse had become the most obvious thing in the world, when no one had even batted an eye beforehand. He just groaned and buried his head in his hands while their cackles filled the now-empty corridor.

“Skizzly, why don’t you just tell him?” Pearl’s calmer voice broke through his freak out, and he looked up to see that Gem had also calmed down and was now looking at him inquisitively.

“Yeah, he definitely likes you back! We can all tell!” Gem was clearly trying to reassure him, but he was too hung up on her word choice.

“We?!! All??! How many people know?!!!” Skizz was almost shouting, and Pearl tried to motion for him to calm down while Gem buried her head in her hands with regret.

“Okay, Skizz, it’s not as bad as Gem made it seem.” Pearl squeezed his shoulder tightly. “She just meant us and like, one of our other friends.”

Skizz tried to calm down, embarrassed at how he had freaked out over something so small. Who cares if he has a crush on Impulse? Everyone would probably find out after he confesses later today, it was the nature of having a small grade.

He had completely accepted that, apparently, he was not as subtle as he thought. Looking between Gem and Pearl, both of whom looked extremely sheepish, he sighed and said, “Don’t tell anyone, yet. I’ll let you know what happens when I hang out with him later.”

The two girls squealed with excitement and pulled him in for a hug, he couldn’t help but reciprocate.

“Can’t wait to have someone to go on double dates with!” Pearl cheered.

“Same! They’re like two stubborn dads trying to convince themselves they don’t have any feelings.” Gem giggled as Skizz tried to swat her with his wing.

“Enough out of you! Go to class!” He turned heel and strutted away, waving his hand in the air as a farewell while their voices faded out in the background.

Despite Gem and Pearl acting completely ridiculous, and somehow recognising how he felt about Impulse when he barely knew it himself, he was happy to see how many of his friends were experiencing budding romance. He only hoped it would work out for him as well.

…

Skizz was going to throw up. His stomach twisted and turned, his heart was racing, and he had a funny taste on his tongue. Even his wings were tensed up, flared around the back of his head instead of hanging loosely by his torso. 

He was going to go through with this. He wasn’t going to chicken out. He was going to tell Impulse how he felt, and it was going to be fine regardless of what Impulse said. He wasn’t going to take it to heart if he got rejected. He wasn’t. 

But first, he had to make it through a gruelling, debilitating study session where he tried to understand basic calculus concepts for the millionth time that year. No matter how intently he listened in class and how much he paid attention during his and Impulse’s tutoring sessions, he was never going to understand it. Although, he spent half their tutoring sessions mooning over Impulse's hair, piercings, style, and quiet yet confident demeanour, so maybe it was slightly on him.

He saw the main door of the school swing open, and Impulse appear out of it, squeezing between many bodies with practised precision. He finally broke free, and Skizz saw his poker face transition into a beaming smile as his gaze met Skizz’s. Skizz felt his face instantly warm, and he tried to nonchalantly lean against his car as Impulse bounded towards him excitedly.

“Hi Skizz!” Impulse wrapped an arm around Skizz and gently leaned his head into Skizz’s neck,  before pulling away just as fast and getting in the car.

Void, Skizz was doomed. How was he meant to act normal when Impulse had just initiated physical contact with him for maybe the first time ever? It wasn’t like they had never hugged before, but it was usually Skizz initiating, and Impulse always seemed a bit timid about it. But now that Impulse was the affectionate one? Yeah, he didn’t stand a chance.

Sucking all his air in, Skizz tried desperately to quell the butterflies causing havoc in his stomach, and got in the driver’s seat. He looked over with a smile to see Impulse focused on his communicator, brows furrowed and lips pursed. He felt a smile tugging at his lips as he focused intently on Impulse’s features, examining them enough for him to be able to forge them into his memory. Realising how insane he must look, Skizz shuddered, trying to focus on something, anything else, so he didn’t end up blurting it out right there and then.

The car rumbled to life, and he reversed quickly out of the parking lot, driving quickly to the library so the sudden heat that filled the car didn’t consume him.

Luckily, he made it without incident, pulling into the library parking lot a few minutes later with a sigh of relief. He turned to look at Impulse, who was still tapping away on his communicator.

“You okay there, bud?” Skizz watched as Impulse’s head quickly snapped up, a sheepish look on his face.

“Yeah, sorry. I’ve been texting one of my friends.” He tucked the communicator into his pocket, but Skizz could still hear insistent buzzes of the device.

“It’s fine, dude, just answer your messages.” Skizz smiled at Impulse, and he felt himself melt as Impulse pursed his lips together in an adorable ‘thank you’ before going back to his texting. This man was going to be the death of him.

A couple of minutes later, Impulse was done, smiling at Skizz gratefully and putting the communicator back into his pocket. Skizz just returned the smile and tried to stop his hand from shaking as he hopped out of the car and made his way around to open Impulse’s door. “After you,” he chirped, feeling a slight wobble in his voice.

“Thanks, Skizz!” Impulse squeezed Skizz’s bicep before getting out and heading to the library entrance.

Skizz felt like he was going to explode. And he was expected to sit through multiple hours of studying without blurting his feelings to the world? He didn’t think he was going to make it.

Skizz followed while Impulse weaved through bustling tables and stacked shelves, eventually ending up in a secluded corner of the library, where all he could hear was the faint chatter of other people and the occasional beep of the checkout.

“Is here good?” Impulse looked at Skizz expectantly, wide brown eyes capturing Skizz’s stare.

“Yeah!” Skizz dumped his bag onto a chair before plonking himself in one, carefully positioning his wings so books wouldn’t go flying off the shelves.

Impulse followed suit, but instead of kicking back, he pulled out his laptop and started tapping away vigorously. 

“Whatcha doin’, Impy Dimpy?” Skizz grinned at the way Impulse’s head snapped upwards, face blushing pink.

“Sorry! I’m just going over the notes I took!” Impulse smiled sheepishly and turned the computer to face Skizz. There was a full document, filled with titles and subtitles had bullet points and diagrams beneath them. 

“What the?!” Skizz felt his jaw drop as he scrolled through the multiple pages of extensive notes relating to the concepts they had been studying. “When did you do all this?!”

“Was bored the other night, decided doing schoolwork could be beneficial.” Impulse rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly as Skizz kept scrolling.

“Dude, you are insane.” Skizz pushed the laptop back towards Impulse, still impressed by the man’s dedication.

“Thanks! I try!” Impulse grinned and put his workbook onto the table. He scribbled answers to the questions with easy skill, occasionally flicking to the answers page and putting a tick next to the corresponding problems.

Skizz watched in awe as Impulse flew through multiple pages in ten minutes, occasionally sticking his tongue out slightly when a problem seemed to bother him. Skizz tried to mimic his behaviour, but instantly got stuck on the first problem.

Impulse’s intelligence never failed to amaze him. His aptness for academia, combined with his ability to do anything he set his mind to, was truly a lethal combination. If he didn’t get valedictorian, Skizz would personally march into the principal’s office and demand a reassessment. 

“Okay, done!” Impulse shut the book and turned to look at Skizz’s despair over a simple problem. “You need help?”

“Always,” Skizz groaned and put his head on the table.

“Okay, look.” Impulse pulled the book towards him, adjusting it so they could both see. He proceeded to explain it as though it were the simplest problem in the world, explaining how to rearrange and substitute the values with practised ease. Skizz tried to listen intently, but Impulse’s instructions turned into underwater garble as he could only focus on the adorable, enthusiastic smile on the demon’s face.

“Got it? If you don’t, I’m happy to do the math while you apply the research.” Impulse pushed the book back, looking at Skizz intently.

“Yeah, I’ll happily do the research, bro. History is my best subject for a reason.” Skizz grinned and pulled his laptop out, googling different types of rollercoasters and the physics rules they operate under. 

“Let’s do this one!” Skizz grinned eagerly as he showed Impulse an image of a loopy rollercoaster, shaped like one half of an infinity symbol.

“Okay! Let me do some math!” Impulse pulled out a blank piece of paper and began scribbling away, neatly annotating his notes so Skizz could at least pretend to understand.

They fell into a comfortable silence, only broken by frequent huffs from Skizz and occasional murmurs of Impulse trying to talk himself into understanding something.

Despite trying to focus on the project, Skizz still found his gaze wandering to Impulse’s focused face, his knitted brows, the way he tugged at his horns, his grip on the pen tightening when a problem was giving him grief. Even though he was doing something Skizz found completely impossible, he still did it in style. 

Not to mention the Green Day shirt that Impulse was wearing. It filled Skizz with joy to know that Impulse enjoyed the music he recommended, enough to sport the band’s merch. Every single thing about Impulse filled him with something more than joy, a feeling he had been trying to squash for as long as he could remember. But Impulse made him want to scream it to the world, shout it from every rooftop just to prove that he was past trying to hide himself.

“You okay?” 

Impulse’s soothing voice snapped him out of his trance, to the embarrassing realisation that he had zoned out while staring at Impulse with an utterly lovesick expression on his face.

“Yeah, just thinking.” Skizz tried to deflect, at risk of making Impulse uncomfortable. After getting to know him and seeing how his flightiness had eased over the past few months, bringing back the old version of Impulse that would shy away from touch and stutter with every word was his new biggest fear.

“Okay, you use that brain.” Impulse grinned and went back to working quietly.

And Skizz went right back to staring at the person who simultaneously made him want to scream his feelings to the world, and repress them deep down for fear of ruining the most important relationship he had ever had.

…

The pair only broke from their calculus-induced stupor hours later, when the sun was creeping behind the hills and a post-winter chill was filling the air. It hit Skizz like a speeding wall, cold seeping into his bones as they walked towards the car. Looking over at Impulse, he saw the demon tightly bundling himself into the smallest form he could, preventing any chill from reaching him and also conserving what little body heat he had left. 

Impulse was trembling from the effort, and Skizz thought back to the day of the snowball fight, the way Impulse had folded like jelly into his arms from the bitter weather. Scooching closer, Skizz summoned all his courage and tucked his wings around Impulse, pulling him close in an attempt to shield the smaller form from the weather.

Impulse smiled gratefully at him, eyes shining from the cold wind and the tip of his nose bright pink. “Thanks, man.” 

“No problem, Dimpy.” Skizz turned away to hide the way his face blushed crimson, and he gently guided them to the car. He pulled the car door open for Impulse, who promptly hopped in.

Quickly shuffling to the other side of the car, Skizz flung the door open and sparked the car to life, pressing the heat button and cranking it to the max. As his body returned to normal, he was reminded of the promise he made to Bdubs. How in a few minutes, he could have potentially destroyed his relationship with Impulse. He couldn’t bring himself to do that, at least not yet.

Instead, Skizz waited a few moments for Impulse to defrost, hearing the contented sighs coming from the passenger seat. His noises of glee suddenly devolved into panic, and he looked at Skizz with disappointment on his face. 

“I left my charger behind.” Impulse looked frustrated at his forgetfulness and irritated that he had to venture back into the cold. 

“That’s okay, we can go back together!” Skizz went to exit the car, before remembering and praising past Skizz for having the frame of mind to put a crucial piece of infrastructure into the car following the snow fight. “Wait!”

He lunged into the backseat, pulling a woollen blanket from the mess of his car. He handed it to Impulse, who smiled so hard his dimples became the most prominent feature on his face. Or was Skizz just looking too hard?

“You’re the best.” Impulse wound the blanket around himself, resembling a furry animal, before getting out of the car and speedwalking back towards the library.

Skizz jogged to catch up, resuming their previous position of his wing being tightly tucked around Impulse’s body. 

They grabbed the charger after an annoyed librarian allowed them in, despite the venue already being closed for the night. While walking back to the car, a vague outline of a person caught Skizz’s eye as they walked across the parking lot.

Squinting harder, he saw the person was barely dressed, wearing only a small pair of shorts and a loose shirt as they approached the pedestrian crossing. 

“Dude, look at that person!” Skizz sighed as Impulse turned around, jaw dropping as he took in what the person was wearing. 

“How?! Why?!” Impulse was gobsmacked, gesturing wildly at the person’s attire and the frost escaping his mouth with every word. 

“I don’t know, bro. They must be freezing.” Skizz couldn’t understand it himself, but tried to put himself in the person’s shoes. Maybe they didn’t have any warmer clothes? Maybe they didn’t even have a place to go.

“Crazy regardless.” Impulse stuttered slightly, teeth chattering violently from the cold.

Skizz’s eyes panned across to a car speeding across the road, showing no signs of slowing down despite the person being in the middle of the crossing. “Oh, shit!” The words ripped from his lips as time seemed to move in slow motion. The person froze in place, turning to see the car racing towards them. 

Skizz felt Impulse’s body go completely rigid as the car’s tires screeched against the asphalt, burnt smell filling the air as they somehow managed to bring their vehicle to a halt. The person flailed as the car almost nudged them, but had stopped just inches from their body. Skizz heard the person yell a curse and stick their middle finger in the air before resuming crossing, and then walking in the opposite direction to them. The car continued, racing off into the night with even more speed than before.

Insane. How could they not have seen the person? It was a completely straight road. “That was almost tragic,” Skizz commented, looking down at Impulse, who was still tucked into his wing.

But Impulse was a few metres back, completely rigid and unmoving, mouth open in a horrified stare towards the empty space where the car and person had just been. The blanket that was tightly wound around him had dropped to the ground, sprawled amongst twigs and dirt that littered the ground.

“Impy Dimpy?” Skizz walked back over, putting his arm around Impulse’s petrified body.

Impulse dropped to the ground, eyes glazed over, and body spasming hard. Skizz tried to catch him, but Impulse went down like a ton of bricks, Skizz only just managing to stop his head from hitting the ground. “Woah, hey, talk to me buddy!”

Impulse was unresponsive, his body heaving in desperate attempts to breathe, and tears were rolling down his face while his eyes stayed as wide as dinner plates. Skizz squeezed his hand hard in an attempt to bring him back, but it was futile.

Impulse’s limp form sprawled onto the ground, still spasming and unresponsive. Skizz focused, trying to source what Impulse was feeling so he could understand how to help. But all he felt was piercing agony, trauma and despair running circles around each other, coupled with a feeling of hopelessness. 

“Impy Dimpy?” Skizz’s cries became more desperate, tears matching Impulse’s own rolling down his face as his best friend lay unresponsive in his arms. “Please talk to me?”

But he got no response. Only sorrow, guilt, and agony that rendered him helpless.

Chapter Text

The world moved by in a daze, yellow street lights stretching into blurred lines against the dark sky. Impulse felt his head lolling around, and his arms hung loosely at his sides. His tail dug into his ankle, and he could feel small beads of blood dripping down to his foot. His breathing was rushed, small gasps of air being sucked in on occasion, worsening the ache in his chest.

His heartbeat quickened as the car stopped beneath him, and the door quickly slammed before he was pulled gently from the car in quick succession. He could hear the soft pants of a warm body next to him, guiding him through a vaguely familiar hallway and up a set of wooden stairs. Soft feathers brushed against his neck, tickling him pleasantly. But Impulse felt his stomach churn as a horrifyingly recognisable bedroom appeared in front of him, a reminder of the last episode he had. 

“No, no, no,” He sank to the floor, gasping for air while hot tears rolled down his cheeks.

“Shit shit, sorry.” A familiar, gentle voice apologised profusely, before picking him up and turning him around, kicking the door closed. Impulse found himself in a different room, sparsely decorated save for a soft green bedspread covering the bed. He was gently placed down, propped up against fluffy pillows and a blanket tucked around his shoulders. 

“Back in a tick,” The winged silhouette left the room, before promptly reappearing with a brown dog trotting in front of him. The dog leapt onto the bed, covering Impulse’s face in slobbery kisses. He leaned into the dog, allowing himself to stroke it absentmindedly while the figure busied themself cleaning up the room a bit. The bed sank slightly as the figure eventually sat down, keeping his distance from Impulse.

“Take all the time you need, buddy.” 

Skizz. His saviour. His angel, literally. Impulse was jerked back into reality as he remembered what had happened. The person. The car. A screech. Burnt tire smell filling the air, creeping into his lungs, choking him. Sinking to the ground as memories raced through his brain. A complete brain and body shut down. Skizz trying to bring him back to life, instead having to bridal carry him to the car.

Hot tears reeking of humiliation rolled down Impulse’s face as his body shook with sobs. Skizz pulled him in, cradling him close and stroking his hair while whispering soothing words into his ear. “I’ve got you, it’s okay. It’s gonna be okay.”

But it wasn’t. The worst day of Impulse’s life had come back to him in flashes of trauma that physically pained his body. And Skizz was the one who had to pick up the pieces, as per usual. 

Impulse let himself heave against Skizz’s body, sobbing so violently he felt like he was going to vomit. All the while, Skizz never stopped soothing, and Kevin Bubbles never stopped nuzzling his leg. 

After what felt like an hour, Impulse felt his breathing return to normal, and his vision was no longer blinded by stinging tears. Blinking hard, he leaned back against the pillows, looking up at Skizz pathetically. He could feel the tears drying against his face, and his hair was ruffled up wildly. He was a mess. But Skizz continued to look at him with utmost concern, biting his lip hard as though he was trying not to cry himself.

Impulse didn’t want to explain himself. He wanted to stay here forever, frozen in time, where Skizz looked at him with eyes full of love and hands trembling from nerves. But that wouldn’t be fair to him; Skizz had managed to get a staggering Impulse all the way to his house. 

“Skizz, I need to-.” 

“No, you don’t.” Skizz’s voice was firm, yet gentle. “You don’t need to explain yourself, you don’t need to rationalise your anxiety. We saw someone almost die for Void’s sake, that’s enough of an explanation.”

“But you deserve to know-.” Impulse heard himself get cut off yet again.

“No, I don’t. No one has to know anything except you, Impy Dimpy.” Skizz ran his thumb over Impulse’s wrist, and Impulse wanted nothing more than to accept that answer and touch as finality.

Impulse allowed himself to get lost in the gentle stroking of Skizz’s thumb over his hand, warmth bubbling in his chest at the angel’s nurturing. He was truly lucky to have made such an incredible friend.

Only when Impulse found himself able to speak without stuttering and feeling an invisible hand gripping his throat tightly did he continue. “I had a brother.”

“Dimpy, you don’t have to do this-.”

“Yes, I do. It was only a matter of time before this spilled out of me. Let me talk.” Impulse’s firm tone struck a chord with Skizz, who straightened up and leaned in to listen attentively.

“I had a brother. His name was Caleb.” Impulse shuddered, trying to articulate a story he had never told anyone except Zed. 

“He was my favourite person in the world. When my parents were struggling for money, he would take me to the playground and push me against the swings, sending me so high I almost looped around the bar.” Impulse chuckled sadly as he reminisced on those fond memories.

“We would go out all the time, to the playground, to the library, to the music store, and if he was lucky enough to have a couple of bucks, he would take me to the ice cream shop and treat me to a chocolate sundae with all the toppings. I still remember the first time I laid eyes upon the ice cream, decadent and sweet and creamy.”

“Those things were expensive too, and he would often go without his own ice cream just so he could see the grin on my face as I demolished the thing.” Impulse felt tears pricking at his eyes, blinking hard to clear his vision. He was determined to get through this story without crying. 

“It was the weekend after winter break, and one day after my birthday. Even though I was freshly thirteen, I could see that my parents' relationship was strained. Money had been tight, and Christmas, followed by my birthday, had only stretched their income thinner. They had just had an awful fight, yelling and screaming that I could have sworn made the house shake.”

“I was crying in my room, and my incredible older brother came in, wiping the tears from his own eyes just so he would have the clarity to wipe mine.”

“He sounds like an incredible brother.” Skizz smiled sympathetically at him.

“Was.” Impulse cleared his throat, trying not to quiver at the way Skizz’s face dropped.

“He took me by the hand, pulling me into the car and driving us far away from all the troubles we were dealing with at home. He cranked the music loud, singing badly to Nirvana just so I would find it in myself to laugh.”

“Naturally, we ended up at the ice cream store, and he didn’t hesitate to buy me the largest, greediest sundae that the store sold. He tried to buy himself a small scoop of vanilla, but I was too busy eating mine to notice that his card had declined. All I saw was him coming back empty-handed, but the smile on his face never even faltered.”

“We sat there for a while, me eating my ice cream, and him cracking every terrible pun under the sun, to the point where I was choking on my ice cream from laughing so hard. To this day, that is still my most treasured memory.”

Impulse took a deep breath, trying to find the strength within himself to share what happened, not even ten minutes later.

“We eventually left, deciding that we had to go and face our parents sooner or later. He led me outside, and we both gaped at how the sky looked. Clearer than ever, stars shining brightly, which complemented the glowing crescent moon that cast a gentle glow onto the road. It was unbelievably beautiful.”

Impulse could feel the hot tears already rolling down his face, but he forced himself to continue.

“Caleb spun me in a circle relentlessly, leaving me gasping for air and wailing about how I was gonna barf. In my daze, I watched him dance onto the road, throwing up the most ridiculous poses and stances to make me laugh even harder.”

Impulse felt his heart rate begin to pick up, and he started speaking quicker so the gut-wrenching twisting of his stomach would dissipate faster.

“A huge light cast over his right side. I looked to my left. A huge van was speeding toward him, showing no sign of stopping. I froze. All he did for me, everything he sacrificed to make me feel better if I so much as bumped my knee, and I couldn’t even find the words to tell him that he was about to die.”

Impulse buried his head in his hands, and he felt Skizz’s strong arms wrap around his body, holding him together and murmuring soothing words into his ear as he fell apart.

“My last memory of him is his frozen expression, wrought with shock and confusion, right before the van ploughed into him. I remember closing my eyes, but nothing can prevent me from remembering the sound of his bones crunching beneath him like an eggshell.”

Impulse was completely hyperventilating now, just trying to choke the rest of the words out so he could stop reliving this nightmare.

“I only looked up a minute later, to see the van speeding away, the smell of burnt tires blending harshly with the thick smell of blood. I saw the crumpled shape of my beautiful older brother in the middle of the road, his body twisted uselessly.”

“Impulse, this is horrible…” Skizz sounded completely aghast and devastated, much like Impulse was.

“I couldn’t bring myself to go to him. I collapsed, anguished screams ripping from my throat as Caleb lay dead on the ground less than five feet away. I assume one of the workers came out at the sound of my screaming, since I heard a horrified gasp and retching from behind me. A hand pressed against my back as I heard the frantic dialling of a phone behind me.”

“I don’t remember much of what happened after that, just that emergency services converged on the location within minutes, wailing sirens and the chatter of distraught paramedics filling the air as they laid a sheet over my sixteen-year-old brother’s body.”

“I remember hearing my mother’s scream of anguish, and my father’s heavy sobs as they had to identify the body of their eldest child. I remember the sombre car ride home, silent and heavy from the tragedy. But what I remember most is that my brother would have found a way to fill the silence, to lighten the air somehow. But he was gone. He is gone. The worst part is, the person who killed him got away with it. The police never found out who did it. I have to live with the fact that the person who murdered my brother might still live here, driving around, alive. ”

Impulse felt his body shaking from the effort, and he squeezed his eyes tightly as though that would help him forget. 

“Impulse, I’m so, so sorry.” Skizz sounded just as defeated as Impulse felt. “There’s truly nothing I can say to make it better, but I hope you know that you did not deserve to see something that awful, that young. Seeing it all is awful.”

“I know.” Impulse choked on his words, throat thick with sobs. Clearing his throat, he continued.

“It was awful. I didn’t go to school for nearly a month. I was completely debilitated by my grief. But as bad as watching Caleb die was, going back to school was almost as bad, if not worse. All the sympathetic looks, the whispers as I walked by, the condolences from my teachers, all this attention,” Impulse spat that word venomously. “All this attention that I didn’t want, attention that just reminded me of what happened. All I wanted was to crawl into a hole and never come out, but people couldn’t even give me that.”

Impulse let himself fall onto Skizz, accepting the gentle hands that stroked his hair while he lay there in a daze. He felt exhausted, but also as if a huge weight had been lifted from his chest. As much as he hated telling that story, he did feel much better.

Impulse lay there for a while, occasionally reaching out for Kevin Bubbles so he could receive a gentle, reassuring lick on the hand. 

“Impulse?” Skizz asked softly, still playing with his hair.

“Yeah?”

“It’s been five years this weekend, hasn’t it?”

Impulse froze, disbelieving at the fact that Skizz had connected the dots so quickly. He thought back to the messages he was sending to Zed earlier, and how Skizz had patiently waited for him to finish without even asking what he was messaging.

“Yeah, it is.” Impulse sat up, his dark brown eyes meeting Skizz’s sad blue.

“That also means you would have had your eighteenth birthday the other day. I was going to ask when your birthday was, but I’m glad I didn’t now.”

Skizz, ever understanding and empathetic. Impulse couldn’t have picked a better friend to tell.

“It’s okay, I’m not keen on my birthday as you’ve probably guessed.”

“It still sucks that your special day has been tainted by something so awful.” Skizz smiled sadly at him and punched him lightly in the chest. “Happy birthday anyway.”

“Thanks,” Impulse returned the smile, and lay back down to fiddle with the soft feathers on the end of Skizz’s wing.

More time passed, and Impulse could feel the air thick with sadness. He felt like the spotlight was on him, the night suddenly all about him and his trauma. Sitting up, he asked Skizz a tentative question.

“Anything you want to share? I’m sure the mood can’t get any more depressing than this.”

Skizz laughed quietly, fiddling with the end of Impulse’s horn. “Yeah, I don’t mind sharing. Are you sure you’re okay if we just move on to my stuff? I don’t want to be one of those self-centred people.”

“Go for it, we’ve heard enough about me.” Impulse straightened his posture, leaning in slightly so he could listen intently.

“Okay.” Skizz inhaled deeply, continuing to fiddle with Impulse’s horn as he began to speak. “As you know, I moved to this school this year. Previously, I went to a small private school a few towns over that went from Pre-K to Grade Twelve.”

Impulse cringed at the thought of having to go to school with the same people for over twelve years.

“I know. One of my very first memories of first grade is showing up, wings sticking straight out from my oversized bag and knocking into some random kids. They made a face and called me stupid, and proceeded to make fun of my wings.” Skizz winced.

“I forgot to mention that, being a private school, it was full of stuck-up kids who had never left their little country-club bubble. Given that most of that circle is quite prejudiced against hybrids, these kids had adopted their parents' attitudes and proceeded to give me shit the rest of the year and beyond.”

Impulse ran his fingers through Skizz’s wing, hoping that the gesture was at least somewhat soothing.

“I didn’t have any close friends, just a few from baseball and drumming practice, but none of them went to my school. So I spent most of my time trying to avoid my tormentors, but because of how small my grade was, they were in every single class. And because I’m an angel, I could feel their hatred towards me and how happy they were when I was there to be their punching bag.”

Impulse winced, thinking about a seven-year-old Skizz who was just trying to make friends and getting bullied in return.

“I hated school. Hated it. But I was lucky to be able to attend such an expensive school, so I just dealt with it. Most of the kids got a bit better as we grew up, but not much.” Skizz shuddered violently.

“At the beginning of my junior year, my parents split up. It wasn’t awful, I had known from a young age that they mostly just tolerated each other, so it didn’t hit me too hard.”

“Oh, Skizz.” Impulse rubbed his arm.

“It’s okay, really! But what did hit me hard was the rumour that started that they divorced because my dad was gay. The area we lived in, they didn’t-” Skizz took a deep breath. “They didn’t look kindly upon… non-traditional relationships. I had already been getting flak for never having had a girlfriend, and what no one knew was that I was gay and had been hiding it for years, so I didn’t get tormented any more.”

“It got so much worse after that. I was shoved into lockers, spat on, called every slur under the sun, and even my teachers frowned at me and tended to grade my work much lower than everyone else.”

“Skizz…” Impulse didn’t know what to say.

“I stopped trying in class, I would just sit there with headphones on so I couldn’t hear what everyone was saying. After a particularly bad day where someone had dumped my lunch on me, I was so full of anger. Anger at my students, teachers, and anger at myself for being born different and getting bullied for it. I really, really hated myself.” A tear rolled down Skizz’s face, which he rubbed away quickly.

“I ended up in the bathroom after a shower, and a razor was in the bathroom cabinet. I turned it over in my hands, thinking about what I was going to do. I did it. I took it to myself, swiping a precise, clean line directly across my thigh.”

Impulse put his hand over his mouth in shock, rendered speechless by what he was hearing.

“All the blood that flowed out of me felt good. I felt good after that, like a weight had been lifted from my shoulders, my mental anguish translated into a physical outlet.”

“It became my only outlet. It was a ritual I repeated every day, adding more and more scars to my body to illustrate the pain I couldn’t articulate.” Skizz lifted his sleeve, showing the faint lines that still littered the space beneath his sleeve. Horizontal, symmetrical lines that were painted on his upper arm.

Impulse traced them lightly, looking at Skizz sadly. “That’s awful, I’m so sorry.”

“Unfortunately, that isn’t the worst of them. There are so many more, practically covering every part of my body that you can’t see.”

Impulse leaned closer, running his fingers through the curled ends of Skizz’s hair. 

“One day, one of them reopened, and I didn’t notice that the blood was staining my sleeve, and my Mom asked me about it. Eventually, she made me lift my sleeve, and I will never forget the look of horror on her face as she took in what she saw.”

“She moved us away after that, to this town and our school, since she had researched alternative schools in the area that would be more accepting of people… like me,” He gestured to his wings. “We were just lucky enough that her sister happened to live here too, which is why I hang out with Bdubs all the time.” A grateful smile formed on his face as he said that.

“Well, at least that’s one positive?” Impulse wasn’t sure what he could say to help.

“Yeah! And I never would have met you!” Skizz grinned and slung his arm around Impulse.

Kevin Bubbles was feeling left out, and shoved his way into the hug, huge wet tongue hanging out of his mouth and covering them all in slobber. Skizz shoved him away playfully, but Kevin forced his way right back in.

Impulse leaned over to grab a dog toy from the bedside table, launching it across the room and giggling with delight as Kevin Bubbles sprinted across the room to pick it up. The newly slobbered ball was dropped into his lap, and he threw it again.

They kept up that game for a while, laughing particularly loudly when Kevin skidded across the floor and landed on his side before walking towards them with a sheepish look on his face.

“Shit, look at the time!” Skizz gestured to the clock near the bed when Kevin Bubbles had finally grown tired of catching. Looking closer, Impulse saw that it was nearly midnight.

“Great! My mom is gonna freak out!” Impulse cringed as he flicked a message to his mom apologising for the lack of communication. 

She texted back fast, saying it was fine and that they could talk tomorrow. Showing his communicator to Skizz, Skizz cringed at the message.

“Oh, good! You’re in for it tomorrow, buddy!” Skizz grinned at Impulse.

“Shut up! She’s gonna kill me!” Impulse shoved him lightly.

“Well, if she’s already mad, do you wanna stay over? It’s a bit too late, and I’m too tired to drop you off, and I don’t like the thought of you walking home in the dark and cold.”

“Yeah, that would be good, as long as you don’t mind!” Impulse felt the weight lift from his shoulders now that he didn’t have to brave the half-hour walk home.

“It’s chill! I’ll go grab the spare mattress!”

Skizz vanished, returning a few minutes later, tugging a single mattress into the room. “I’ll sleep on this,” He threw a pillow and a blanket onto the mattress before flopping down.

“Stop it! This is your house, Skizz!” Impulse went to drag Skizz up, but his hand was swatted away.

“It’s all good, I don’t feel like moving now.” Skizz grinned and pulled the blanket around himself so he was cocooned tightly.

“If you say so,” Impulse sighed and tucked himself in.

“Warm enough?” Skizz asked before reaching over to turn off the bedside lamp.

“Yeah.” Impulse buried his head into the pillow as the room was plunged into darkness.

Impulse stayed silent for a while, letting the sound of the rain pattering on the roof and Skizz’s soft breathing lull him into a sleepy haze. Before drifting off to sleep, he had one more thing to say.

“Hey, Skizz?”

“Yeah, dimpy?”

“Thank you for making me feel comfortable enough to talk about my brother. I’ve only ever spoken to one friend about it before.”

“Of course, bud. I hope you know you didn’t deserve any of that.”

“You didn’t deserve what happened to you either.”

“Thanks, means a lot.”

Impulse took a deep breath before letting the next words leave his mouth.

“I love you. You’re an incredible friend, and I’m so glad to have met you.”

Skizz was silent for a minute, and Impulse could have sworn he heard Skizz’s breathing quicken and his heartbeat out of his chest.

“I love you, too, buddy. Thank you.”

“Of course.”

A faint yellow glow shone from Skizz’s place on the mattress as Skizz turned over and began to snore softly a few minutes later. Impulse looked at him, at the boy who had made him comfortable enough to share the worst moment of his life. He felt a smile tug at the corner of his mouth, and his stomach fluttered, but not in his typical, anxiety-induced way. This feeling was warm and comforting, like strong arms holding him close and murmuring soothing words in his ear. It felt like home. 

Impulse turned over and let himself fall into a dreamless sleep, a stretching void of black that was a warm welcome from his usual nightmares.

Chapter Text

A loud bark jerked Skizz awake, and he sat upright to source the noise. He saw Kevin Bubbles leap onto the bed, covering Impulse’s stirring body with wet, slobbery kisses. 

Skizz looked to the door and groaned, seeing it had somehow been pushed open. Kevin had recently figured out how to open doors, leading to constant unrest for him. Impulse had now fallen victim to Kevin’s new skill, and Skizz could see him yawning widely and sleepily patting the dog.

“Sorry, Dimpy. Kevin’s too smart for his own good.” Skizz chuckled, seeing Impulse gesture fondly and keep stroking Kevin’s head.

“Sss fine,” Impulse murmured, rubbing the sleep from his eyes drearily.

Skizz just smiled fondly at Impulse’s cute, exhausted smile and tangled bedhead. He could feel his halo starting to warm up above his head, and flicked himself in the knee in a panic to shut it off.

Impulse didn’t have to know, yet. Skizz knew it wasn’t the right time, not after everything they had shared last night. Telling Impulse he liked him after he had bared his soul to him last night would be unfair; he knew that Impulse would feel obliged to like him back.

And Skizz knew there was no chance of that happening. Not yet, at least.

Skizz winced as he remembered how happy he had been when Impulse said he loved him last night, only to affirm that he meant it platonically.

That had stung.

But no matter, Skizz could be patient. He cared too much about Impulse to even fathom messing this up.

“Skizz?”

Skizz snapped to attention, looking into Impulse’s semi-awake brown eyes. “Yeah?”

“What time is it? My communicator is dead, and I don’t want to worry my Mom.”

Skizz glanced at the alarm clock that had somehow ended up on the floor, groaning once he saw the time. “It’s eleven a.m…”

“Shit! My Mom is gonna be freaking out!” Impulse jumped off the bed, much to the chagrin of Kevin, who walked over to Skizz with his tail tucked between his legs.

“Sorry, Impy, I should have set an alarm.” Skizz sighed, looking over at Impulse, who was hastily pulling on his hoodie.

“It’s fine, we obviously needed the sleep after that massive trauma-dump.” Impulse grinned, his tail flicking playfully behind him.

“Yeah, I think that took it out of us.” Skizz stood, stretching his back and wings. He meandered closer to Impulse, who was digging through his bag for something. Impulse pulled a cord out of his bag before turning around and jumping as he looked up at Skizz.

“Uh… what’s up, man?” Impulse pushed past him to plug the cord into the wall and then into his communicator.

Skizz exhaled, trying to make sure he didn’t mess up his next words. “Are you okay, Dimpy?”

Impulse raised an eyebrow, looking at Skizz with confusion. “Yeah?”

“No, really. What you told me last night sounded genuinely traumatising; I can’t get the thought out of my head, and it didn’t even happen to me. And I can’t just sit with the idea that you might not truly be okay, or that you told me just because you felt obliged to. So, I’m asking, are you actually okay?” Skizz looked at Impulse expectantly, hoping with all his heart that Impulse wasn’t about to tell him that he shared all that because he felt like he had to. Skizz wanted Impulse to trust him, and any answer that didn’t affirm that would likely make him spiral.

Impulse sat down, breathing faster. Skizz could feel the anxiety swimming in the atmosphere start to build up, but it tempered down and gave way to relief and happiness before Skizz could freak out about how Impulse was feeling.

“Skizz, you’re too kind for your own good.” Impulse grinned and reached out to squeeze Skizz’s hand and pull him down next to him. Skizz obliged, scooting closer and allowing himself to get lost in Impulse’s huge brown eyes. 

“Skizz, I promise, I did not tell you that because I felt like I had to, or whatever you think.” Impulse smiled comfortingly, running his thumb over Skizz’s hand. “I told you that because I trust you, and because you made me feel safe enough to share that. You shouldn’t think I was obligated to tell you because of my breakdown, because I wasn’t. That was because of you , Skizz.”

Skizz could have cried. Knowing he hadn’t accidentally coerced Impulse into sharing the most traumatising moment of his life lifted a huge weight from his shoulders. The mere thought of hurting the most important person in his life truly sickened him; he wasn’t sure what he would have done if Impulse had said anything else.

Instead of bursting into tears from happiness, Skizz smiled, took a deep breath, and pulled Impulse into a tight hug. “I love you, Impy Dimpy Dop,” Skizz murmured into his hair. Impulse didn’t need to know that Skizz meant that in a different way than Impulse was thinking.

“Love you too, Skizz.” Skizz could feel Impulse’s tail start to wind around his ankle, before stopping abruptly as Impulse pulled back.

“What did you just call me?!” Impulse teased, poking Skizz in the arm.

Skizz groaned, disbelieving that he had somehow given Impulse another nickname. He had no choice but to own it at this point. “The nickname grind never stops, homie! I’ll give you new nicknames for the rest of eternity if I have to!”

“But Impy Dimpy Dop? That’s such a mouthful.” Impulse laughed, his tail beginning to rewind itself around Skizz’s ankle.

“Yeah, but it’s awesome! I’ll call you that forever, Impy Dimpy Dop!” Skizz laughed, ruffling Impulse’s hair.

“Until you come up with another one!”

“Well, you’ll have to wait and see!”

“Void, I don’t think I want to.”

“Hey! My nicknames are great!”

“Yeah, they are.” Impulse smiled before reaching over to grab his violently buzzing communicator. His face dropped, and he typed away furiously before getting to his feet and grabbing his bag.

“What’s the matter, Impy Dimpy Dop?” Skizz stood as well, looking at Impulse with concern.

“Void, you’re really committing to that? Anyway, my Mom is outside, so I gotta go.” Impulse smiled apologetically, bending down to pet Kevin Bubbles.

“Oh. I hope we didn’t worry her too much.” Skizz rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly.

“She’ll be fine, don’t worry about it.” Impulse blinked up at Skizz, looking at him with dark brown eyes that Skizz knew he could get lost in without complaint.

“If you’re sure. Bye, Impy Dimpy Dop.” Skizz grinned as Impulse groaned, burying his face in his hands.

“You’re so weird. Bye, Skizz.” Impulse pulled Skizz in for a hug, wrapping his arms tightly around Skizz’s back. Skizz winced as he felt his wings get squished, but he happily reciprocated the hug. He would accept any discomfort just to make Impulse happy.

Impulse pulled away, pulling the door open and disappearing with a wave and smile. Skizz collapsed onto his bed once the door shut, feeling nervous energy course through him. The butterflies ravaged his stomach worse than ever, violent fluttering making his stomach turn with simultaneous happiness and dread.

He was in love with his best friend. 

He was in love with the person with a crippling fear of being noticed, which Skizz now understood came from deep-rooted trauma. He always knew that Impulse tended to be more anxious than most, but it was so much worse than Skizz had thought. He could only imagine how Impulse would react if Skizz told him, told him that he had paid attention to every little bit of Impulse and loved him anyway. While it seemed romantic, Skizz knew that Impulse would instead hyperfixate on how everything he did had been perceived.

But what if Skizz didn’t tell him? Instead, he hid it and tried to bury his feelings out of fear that Impulse would react badly. Impulse would surely notice and freak out anyway once he realised that Skizz was acting differently, assuming the worst.

Essentially, whatever Skizz did had the potential to make him lose the most important relationship he had ever had. 

He sat up, trying to acknowledge the reality of the situation. The only way this would work out was if Impulse liked him back, and he didn’t see that happening. Not after Impulse had basically confirmed that he only viewed Skizz as a friend.

There was nothing Skizz could do, other than try to act as normal as possible without revealing or suppressing his feelings. To reveal them would be to ruin his friendship, and to suppress them would go against everything Angels stood for.

He was done for.

Before Skizz realised what he was doing, he had opened his communicator and flicked a message to the BEST group chat, asking them all to come over. As he sent that message, he wasn’t sure what he expected from it. Was he going to tell them? Was he trying to distract himself?

Skizz knew he should tell them. They were his best friends, and they were all in or had been in relationships before.

Surely they would know what to do.

Before Skizz could take anything back, three messages came through, each one from a different member saying they were on their way.

No turning back now.

…

“Hey, Baby!” Bdubs' booming voice filled the room as he pushed his way in, dragging Etho along behind him.

“Bdouble-down! Etho! How are you guys?!” Skizz jumped to his feet, wrapping them both in a hug.

“We’re good, Skizz. How are you?” Bdubs murmured against his chest, his confusion only muffled slightly.

“I’m good, guys!” Skizz kept them close, not wanting to let them go just yet.

“Are you sure, Skizz? You’re kinda squishing us here,” Etho mumbled, and Skizz noticed how tense Etho was. He released them instantly, shooting a sheepish smile in both their directions.

“Sorry, Etho, I forgot you’re not really a hugger.”

“It’s okay, just wondering what’s going on with you? You’re not usually this clingy.” Etho grinned, punching Skizz in the shoulder playfully.

“Yeah, what’s happening with you? You look like you’re itching to tell us something.” Bdubs looked at Skizz with huge eyes full of concern.

“I do have to tell you guys something, but I’m gonna wait for Tango to get here. He’ll kill me if I leave him out.” Skizz slumped onto his bed, holding his hand out for Kevin Bubbles to stick his nose into.

“I’m here, I’m here!” Tango walked into the room, tail swishing back and forth. “Hey, guys!”

“Heyyyy, Top.” Skizz thought he sounded enthusiastic, but the way all three of them looked at him with concern and confusion made him think otherwise.

“Okay, buddy, what’s wrong? I’ve never heard you sound so down before.” Tango sat down next to him, rubbing the space between his wings gently.

“I really am fine, just trying to find the words.” Skizz buried his head in his hands, but he could still hear the soft steps of Etho and Bdubs coming to sit down in front of him.

“Take your time, baby,” Bdubs whispered.

Skizz closed his eyes for a minute, trying to find the words to tell them. He eventually sat up, took a deep breath in, and decided to just cut to the chase.

“Guys, I’m in love with Impulse, and I don’t know what to do.” Skizz instantly looked over at Bdubs, who was trying his best to keep a neutral expression on his face. Skizz knew that Bdubs had already known; he had noticed before Skizz had. He noticed Bdubs crack a small smile, before quickly resetting his face to a blank, but interested expression. Skizz was grateful that Bdubs was being somewhat subtle.

Etho seemed to be a tad more confused, with one eyebrow raised and his head cocked to the side. Despite the mask that obscured his expression, Skizz could still tell that Etho didn’t seem all that surprised. Again, not surprising. Etho was one of the most observant people he knew.

Tango, however, wasn’t so subtle.

“I KNEW IT!” Tango shrieked, standing up so he could jump up and down excitedly. “I knew it the moment you roped me into your scheme to apologise to him! You would have never tried that hard to apologise to any of us!”

Skizz reached out and swatted Tango on the arm forcefully, trying to get him to quiet down. Etho and Bdubs didn’t know about what had happened to Impulse on Halloween, and he had no intention of telling them.

Tango paused, the smile instantly dropping from his face. He quickly looked over to Etho and Bdubs, who were looking between Tango and Skizz, confused. 

“Y’know what, I don’t think we need to know, do we, Bdubs?” Etho looked over to Bdubs, who shrugged.

“Yeah, I didn’t hear what they said anyway.” Bdubs kept his face neutral, but Skizz still noticed the small glimmer of a grin that threatened to appear on his face.

Thank Void Etho could tell that Skizz did not want to get into that.

“Thanks, guys. Anyway, I’m in love with my best friend, so can one of you please tell me what I should do? You’ve all been in relationships before, you know what you’re doing. Help!”

“Skizz, the only thing you can do is tell him.” Tango was blunt, and Skizz appreciated that. Unfortunately, his advice wasn’t quite helpful.

“I know that! But you guys don’t know him well enough to realise that he would freak out.” Skizz groaned, lying back and staring at the ceiling.

“I don’t think he would, I’m almost certain he likes you too.” Bdubs sounded enthusiastic, but his enthusiasm fell on deaf ears.

“Guys, I hate to be one of those people who doesn’t take their buddies’ advice, but I really don’t think he does. He stayed over last night, and he said he loved me, but he very explicitly said it was platonic.” Skizz sat up, looking at his friends glumly.

“He stayed over last night?” Etho questioned, raising an eyebrow.

“Yeah, what’s that about, skippy? I didn’t know you guys were that close.” Tango crossed his arms, looking Skizz up and down.

Skizz sighed as he realised he didn’t have a cop-out for this situation. All he could do was reveal as little about Impulse as possible. 

“We were studying, and as we were leaving we saw someone almost get run over by a car, and he started freaking out.”

“Void, are you serious? That’s terrible.” Bdubs’ face twisted into worry.

“Yeah, it was bad. I ended up taking him here because he was pretty out of it, and we got to talking, and we each had a bit of a vent.”

“Well, that’s something at least,” Etho remarked, eyes crinkling slightly at the edges. Skizz could tell it was from relief rather than apprehension.

“It was good, we both needed it. I actually ended up telling him why I moved schools.” Skizz winced as all three of their faces dropped. Tango looked both shocked and proud, Bdubs’ mouth was wide open, and Etho looked like he had just misheard him.

“Did you really?” Bdubs asked, mouth still agape.

“Yeah, it felt right.” Skizz smiled as his friends all shared a proud look, and Tango came to sit next to him.

“Proud of you, Skizz.” Tango leaned into his shoulder. “I know that must have been hard.”

“Thanks, buddy.” Skizz wrapped an arm around Tango, relishing in the warmth emanating from the blaze’s body.

“You really love Impulse, huh?” Etho blurted, before instantly slapping a hand over his mouth as they all turned to look at him. “I just mean that you’ve never told anyone except us, and that was after a few drinks.”

Skizz cringed as he remembered the first sleepover the group had, how they bonded over their aspirations for the band to make it big and the nostalgia of being in their last year of high school. And of course, how he got a bit too drunk and accidentally spilled his darkest secret to people who hardly knew him at the time.

Regardless, Etho was right. Although he loved his friends to bits, Impulse was on a completely different level from them. And while Skizz could tell himself it was because he loved Impulse differently, he knew that Impulse was going to be someone very special from the moment he introduced himself.

“Oh, Skizz, you’re toast,” Bdubs’ voice had a hint of humour to it that made Skizz groan loudly.

“You guys are the worst! What am I supposed to do?!” Skizz dragged his hands down his face.

“Skizz, all you can do is wait for your crush to disappear or wait for him to confess to you. If you’re not willing to tell him yourself, those are your only options, really.” Tango shrugged, but still rubbed Skizz’s shoulder in consolation.

“Really? For guys who have had their fair share of relationships, this advice is not as profound as I thought it would be.” 

“Sorry, bud, if you don’t wanna tell him you’re not left with many options.” Etho sounded supportive, but it was clear that he didn’t agree with Skizz’s mindset.

“I can’t tell him, not yet, at least.” Skizz sighed. “Thanks for your advice anyway, guys. Love you all!”

“Love you, Skizz!” Tango grinned and leaned into Skizz’s shoulder.

“Awww, group hug everyone!” Bdubs plonked himself down next to Skizz, tucking himself into Skizz’s wing. He gestured to Etho with grabby hands, smiling and wiggling his eyebrows up and down.

“You know you want to!” Skizz chuckled, looking at Etho’s sullen expression that gave way to crinkled eyes and what Skizz could only assume was a wide smile.

Etho crawled in, leaning his head on Bdubs’ lap. Bdubs stroked his hair absentmindedly before pressing a soft kiss to the top of his head. Etho looked up, eyes glistening as he leaned over and pulled his mask down briefly to press a quick kiss to Bdubs’ lips.

Skizz looked on in shock and joy, the sight of his friends in love filling him with joy. What’s more, seeing Etho completely come out of his shell filled him with an immense sense of pride. It was clear that love suited him. And Skizz was okay with not experiencing it himself. Seeing it happen for others was enough.

“WHEN DID THIS HAPPEN?!”

Skizz turned meekly to look at Tango, who had a look of simultaneous bewilderment and indignance on his face while his hair flickered more violently than usual.

“Uhhhh…” Etho wrenched his mask back over his face, looking between Tango and Bdubs sheepishly.

“About three-ish weeks ago? Maybe four?” Bdubs shrugged, but Skizz could feel the awkwardness and guilt that Bdubs was feeling.

“Why didn’t you tell us? We’ve all been waiting for this day.” Tango asked sadly, the violent flickering of his hair starting to diminish.

“We were just trying to figure out our feelings; it was nothing personal.” Bdubs winced at Tango’s forlorn expression before crawling over to rub Tango’s back soothingly.

“Yeah, we didn’t really tell anyone,” Etho added lightly, trying to be less blunt than usual.

Skizz decided not to mention that he already knew; it wouldn’t help the situation and had no real relevance regardless. If he hadn’t mentioned it to Bdubs, he’s sure Bdubs wouldn’t have told him.

“That’s fair enough, I guess.” Tango sighed, leaning into Bdubs’ back rubs. A cheeky smirk overcame his face, but promptly vanished. Skizz still noticed it and decided he wasn’t going to let Tango get away with that one. Not after he had almost exposed Skizz earlier.

“Something you wanna tell us, Top?” Skizz wiggled his eyebrows up and down. “I saw that smirk of yours, mister.”

Tango looked at Skizz in surprise, mouth open in mortification as Etho and Bdubs both turned to look at him. “Jerky! I can’t believe you noticed that!”

“Well, go on, share with the class, Tango,” Etho remarked cheekily. 

“Fineeeeeee, but I’m gonna seem like a massive hypocrite.” Tango groaned before continuing. “Jimmy and I started dating on Monday.”

The other three immediately started cheering, with Skizz wolf-whistling loudly while wrapping Tango in a hug. “That’s my boy!” Skizz cheered.

“Way to go, baby!” Bdubs grinned, flashing a million-dollar smile that made Tango curl in on himself.

“So happy for you, Tango!” Etho chuckled, reaching over to gently pat Tango on the knee.

“You guys are such weirdos, I love you all.” Tango groaned, but he couldn’t help the happy smile that crept onto his face.

Skizz just smiled, wrapping a wing around Tango tightly. He was happy that his friends were happy. Regardless of what he felt for Impulse, he didn’t need to experience romance himself to feel happy that it was happening to everyone else. Even if he wanted it with a desperation that he could barely articulate, he would wait, for Impulse’s sake. The last thing he wanted to do was hurt his feelings.

“Anyway, I have to go home, boys. Physics homework is calling my name.” Tango got to his feet, heading to the door and waving goodbye as he pushed the door open.

“Wait, wait, wait, Tango!” Etho called in a bizarrely desperate tone. “Who asked out who?”

Tango raised an eyebrow curiously before tentatively answering. “I asked him out, why?”

“Shit!” Etho groaned.

“HAH!” Bdubs cheered, getting to his feet and doing a little dance. “Cough it up, Etho!”

“What are you talkin’ about?” Skizz demanded, shooting a frustrated glare at Bdubs, who was laughing evilly. He didn’t like being excluded from the joke.

“Bdubs and I each took a twenty-dollar bet on who would ask out who: I bet that Jimmy would ask, he bet that Tango would ask.” Etho’s groan immediately gave way to a yelp as Tango lunged at him, shouting indignantly.

“You bet against me?! Jerky!” Tango tackled Etho to the ground, his shouts of outrage giving way to laughter as Etho apologised profusely.

Skizz cackled, delighting in Etho’s yelps and Tango’s indignant cries. 

“I always had faith in you, Tang Tang,” Bdubs smirked. “I would never bet against my friend like Etho did.”

“Yeah, Etho , how could you think so little of your buddy?!” Skizz piled on, pointing at Etho with mock disappointment.

“I hate you all.” Etho deadpanned, but the crinkle of his eyes gave his stony facade away. 

“You love us!” Skizz leaned over to ruffle Etho’s hair fondly.

“Yeah,” Etho conceded, “I do.”

“Ayeeee! He said he loves us! He does care!” Bdubs leaned over to squish Etho’s cheeks. “He’s just a big softie,” Bdubs continued to gush as Etho swatted his hand away.

“Aww, bring it in, Etho!” Skizz leaned over to wrap Etho in a brief but tight hug. He was elated to realise that Etho actually reciprocated.

“How wholesome,” Tango laughed. “Anyway, I’m off for real now! Bye!” Tango waved and vanished behind the door.

“Yeah, we should probably head off too.” Etho got to his feet, brushing white feathers from his clothes while shooting Skizz an exasperated look. 

Skizz just shrugged, trying his best to widen his eyes like a completely innocent child. 

“See ya, baby!” Bdubs called, grabbing Etho’s hand and pulling him out the door.

“Bye!” Skizz waved them out the door before collapsing onto his bed with a smile.

Maybe he couldn’t reveal his true feelings to Impulse. It just didn’t sit right with him. He would have to be patient, wait until the time was right.

In the meantime, he could always tell his best friends every little thought that was on his mind. And maybe, for now, that was enough.

Chapter Text

Impulse sheepishly approached the car, still blinking exhaustion from his eyes despite sleeping for eleven hours the night before. 

He saw his mom sitting upright in the driver’s seat, clenching the steering wheel so tightly that Impulse could see the whiteness of her knuckles even from several feet away.

He pulled the passenger door open and his mom’s head whipped to the side, breathing a sigh of relief. 

“Heyyy, Mom,” Impulse tried to chirp, but his voice fell completely flat from guilt.

“Morning, honey, how are you? Are you okay? I was really worried!” His mom gushed, tugging on her horn nervously.

“I know, Mom, I’m really really sorry.” Impulse winced, tugging at his horn as well.

“It’s okay, Impulse, just please don’t worry me like that again,” his mom sighed. “I know you’re a teenager, even an adult now, but I shudder to think what could happen if I didn’t know where you were and something happened.”

His mom didn’t need to clarify that she was talking about Caleb; Impulse could figure that out for himself. 

“I’m really sorry, I promise I won’t do this ever again.” Impulse smiled as his mom gently stroked his arm.

“I know you are, honey. Let’s go home, huh?” She turned the car on and pulled onto the road.

The car ride home, while brief, was far too silent for Impulse’s liking. The guilt gnawed at him, chewing away small parts of his soul with every silent second that passed. He knew he was lucky to have a mom like his, but it made it all the more gut-wrenching when he let her down.

“How is Skizz anyway? You’ve been with him a lot recently,” his mom asked, wiggling her eyebrows playfully.

Impulse blushed, unsure what she was trying to imply. “He’s good, we’ve had a lot of band stuff and school projects recently. That’s what we were doing last night, we had a calc project to work on.”

“That’s good sweetie. I’m glad you’ve made such a great friend, just be safe , yeah?” She emphasised the word safe as if it were an innuendo, making Impulse even more confused.

“You know I will be,” he grinned, happy at the relaxed smile that appeared on his mom’s face.

“That’s good to hear-” She paused as if she was about to continue, but promptly closed her mouth instead.

Impulse raised an eyebrow, but chose to brush it off anyway. She was probably referring to being safe in general, like being out when it was dark.

His house appeared in front of him, a warm welcome that he had sorely missed. Even though he had only been away from it for slightly over a day.

He exited the car, heading to the door.

“Wait, sweetie!”

He turned around to see his mom shuffling awkwardly and tail lashing slightly. “Can I have a hug? Please?”

“Of course, Mom.” Impulse walked over, tucking himself into her arms like he was a little kid again. Even though he was now several inches taller than her, the warm embrace brought him back to when he was a young kid who just wanted his mom. Even if he had relied heavily on Caleb to get him through the rough times as a kid, his mom was still a constant in his life that he would never take for granted.

“I love you, honey,” his mom murmured into his chest.

“Love you too, Mom.” Impulse released her, smiling brightly and heading inside before the cold got the better of him.

He slowly trudged through the house, basking in the warmth that surrounded him and defrosted his insides. Paws loudly skittered across the floor, coming closer until a heavy, delighted form crashed into his legs with a bark.

“Primmers!” Impulse leaned down, ruffling her ears as her head lolled absentmindedly. She pawed at his legs, somehow demanding even more ear scratches.

“Come on, Primmers, let’s go upstairs!” Impulse ran up the stairs, Prim bounding behind him with gleeful barks.

Impulse pushed open the door to his room, breathing a heavy sigh of relief as his bed loomed in front of him. With a happy skip over, he lay down flat on his stomach, allowing the memory foam mattress to sink beneath him.

As silly as it was, he missed sleeping in his own bed.

Yawning widely, he felt weariness weigh down his eyelids despite being well-rested.  Feeling the comforting warmth of Prim spinning in a circle and lying down, he let his eyes close. Spilling his entire soul to Skizz had been difficult and exhausting; surely a short nap couldn’t hurt?

The warm sunlight that filled his room gave way to a black, stretching void before he had time to form a second thought.

…

Fog clouded Impulse’s brain as he blinked awake, the gentle knocking on his door jolting him into consciousness. The previous light that filled his room had vanished, giving way to a purple evening glow. 

How long had he slept for?

Prim was still curled up beside him, soft snoring accompanying the occasional twitch. Rubbing his eyes drearily, Impulse sat up, catching a brief glimpse of himself in the mirror across from his bed. His hair was a mess, sticking up every which way, and a small wet spot on his shirt indicated that he had drooled a bit.

“Honey?”

Impulse snapped to attention, looking over to his bedroom door. “Come in!” He tried to chirp, but his voice was slightly hoarse, and it came out more like a rasp.

His door was pushed open, revealing his mom holding a steaming plate of food. “Brought you dinner! I didn’t want to bother you before, but I thought you should eat something.”

“Thanks, Mom. I appreciate it,” Impulse smiled, reaching out for the plate.

“That’s okay, sweetie,” she pinched his cheek affectionately. “What have you been doing in here? It’s been awfully quiet.”

“Sleeping,” Impulse admitted sheepishly.

“That’s okay, clearly you needed the rest.” His mom smiled, reaching out to ruffle Prim’s ears. “I’ll leave you be, goodnight, honey! Remember to bring the plate down when you’re done.”

“Thanks, Mom, love you.” Impulse called as she headed out the door.

“Love you more!” She blew a kiss at him before pulling the door shut.

Impulse looked over the food, smiling as he realised it was his favourite meal. A Philly cheesesteak with a side of fries and salad, with the sauce in a separate pot, just how he liked it.

Impulse took a bite of the salad and realised just how hungry he really was. If he was remembering correctly, he hadn’t eaten anything since lunchtime yesterday. It was a bad trait of his; if he wasn’t able to eat or couldn’t be bothered, he simply wouldn’t. 

He allowed himself to enjoy the meal, taking slow, careful bites of the salad before moving on to the fries. It was another weird way he ate his food; he had to eat each ‘type’ before moving onto the next. He usually tended to save his favourite for last, which was the cheesesteak in this case.

Prim chirped from next to him, similarly eyeing up the cheesesteak that Impulse was about to put into his mouth. Chucking a piece of steak onto the floor, Impulse turned back to his food.

When he finished, he headed downstairs to put the plate in the dishwasher, smiling as he saw his parents cuddled next to each other on the couch, watching some mindless action film that involved some guy running for his life. 

Disinterested in the film, Impulse headed back upstairs, leaving Prim behind so she wouldn’t whine to be let out later.

As he returned, he heard his communicator buzzing wildly. It was either a flurry of messages, or someone was trying to call him. While it was probably Zed, it could be anyone. Somehow, by being friends with Skizz, he had made more friends than he ever had in his life. 

Sitting on his bed and picking up the communicator, Impulse saw that it was, in fact, Zed. And it was a flurry of messages. 

Zedaph: Heya Impulse! 

Zedaph: Sorry I haven’t messaged you in a while, I’ve had a lot of internship related things happening recently!

Zedaph: How have you been?

Impulse smiled before typing out a response. It was just like Zed to get caught up in some science experiment and vanish for a week or two. Although, Impulse hadn’t been any better at texting.

Impulse: hi zed! ive been good, havent been doing much tbh

Impulse: hbu?

Zedaph: I’m good! This internship has been quite hard, but that’s to be expected. I love it though!

Impulse: still cant believe you got an internship at 17 yrs old

Zedaph: What can I say, I like what I do and the people like what I do too!

Impulse: lol

Zedaph: Anyway, I was wondering if you wanted to hop on Phasmo? I’m bored and itching to play with you, it’s been too long man

Impulse: isnt it like 3 am your time…

Zedaph: I’m a scientist, not sleeping is kinda our thing!

Impulse: weirdo

Impulse: ill video call u now 

Zedaph: Okay!

Impulse opened the menu, hitting the call button excitedly. While he hated video calls, he could handle them with Zed. Besides, it was one of the only ways to stay in contact, considering they lived on different continents.

The millisecond Zed picked up, Impulse couldn’t stop himself from yelling “Yello!” into the microphone.

“Ow! My eardrums! How could you!” Zedaph chuckled whilst trying to feign indignance. 

“What’s up, bro?” Impulse smiled down the communicator, taking in the sight of the ram hybrid with a goofy smile plastered across his face. 

“Nothing, man! Just itching to play Phasmo!” Zed grinned.

“And you’re too much of a wuss to play alone?” Impulse teased.

“Hey!” Zedaph turned pink and pointed his finger at the screen. “So what? It’s a scary game dude, sorry for being scared !”

“Wuss.” Impulse deadpanned, trying to stop a smirk from tugging at the corner of his mouth.

“Hey! I’ll unfriend you!”

“Who’s gonna listen to your science rants?”

“Who’s gonna listen to your drumming rants?”

“Skizz, duh.”

“UGH! I hate that guy; he’s stealing my best friend away.”

“Not hard when you’re not even physically here to stop it.”

“Low blow, man.”

“Sorry.”

Zed went quiet for a moment, and Impulse worried that he had actually offended him. But instead, a quick sentence burst from Zed’s lips that made Zed smirk.

“Who’s gonna play Phasmo with you?”

“Ugh, touché,” Impulse groaned, before adding with a playful grin: “But at this rate, you won’t be playing with me either if you don’t quit your yappin’.”

“Okay, okay, okay, I’ll get on the game, goodness.” Zed’s British accent came out as he sighed exaggeratedly, but Impulse could still see the glimmer of a grin on his face.

Impulse created a lobby, repeating the code to Zed several times and with much frustration before he finally got into the game.

“Right, Zed, what difficulty do we want? Professional? Nightmare?”

“Professional, I’m too tired to properly focus right now.” Zed yawned as he spoke, and Impulse got a very unnecessary glance into the back of his mouth.

“Dude, you know it’s okay to sleep, right? We can play anytime!”

“Nahhh, I’m already here! I assume we’re doing Tanglewood?”

“You know it!” Impulse grinned and wiggled his eyebrows at Zed through the communicator, getting a chuckle out of the ram. “I’m starting!”

“Ooookay!”

They were teleported from the lobby into the van, where they gathered their tools and bickered about who was doing evidence and objectives and who was doing the media. Impulse won the argument, although Zed was too tired to truly fight for trying out the new media update.

“Let’s go!” Impulse picked up his gear and headed in, sighing happily as the familiar one-storey white house came into view. He had missed this game.

Walking through the house, he went through his usual routine of turning on the breaker and searching for the ghost room, which he determined to be the garage. 

“Sooooo, Impulse?” Zed sang, a mischievous lilt to his voice.

This couldn’t be good.

“Yeah, Zed?” Impulse replied hesitantly.

“How’s your band doing?”

Weirdly mischievous for such a normal question, but whatever. “It’s good-” Impulse started.

“-More specifically, how’s Skizz ?” Zed chirped as though he meant nothing by it.

There it was. Nothing good ever happened when Zedaph got that playfulness in his tone. Impulse felt himself blushing already, his stomach turning in a weirdly nervous and comforting way. But, he couldn’t for the life of him figure out why.

“He’s good, why do you ask?” Impulse choked out, trying to ignore the mischief that dominated Zed’s expression on his communicator screen.

“Well, you haven’t mentioned him in a while, and I thought you might have finally gotten over him!” Zed wiggled an eyebrow suggestively, making Impulse sigh impatiently.

“I never needed to get over him, Zed, I was always under him- NO WAIT!” Impulse groaned, immediately turning bright red as Zedaph howled with laughter, his Phasmo character shaking in synchronisation with him. “I hate everything,” Impulse murmured, burying his face in his hands.

“Void, I don’t think you’ll ever top that one, Impulse! Both figuratively and literally!” Zed dissolved into more laughter as the double entendre smacked Impulse right in the face.

“You suck! You’re a dirty-minded little man!” Impulse tried to sound frustrated, but he soon allowed the snickers to consume him.

Only once they had both calmed down did Zed speak again, more seriously this time. “Okay, but really, what’s going on with the band? You haven’t talked about it in a while, and I know you were super excited.”

Impulse smiled at his friend, who was looking at him with concerned blue eyes from the communicator. It was nice to know that someone noticed his silence. Except for Skizz, who seemed to notice the tiniest, most imperceptible differences about Impulse. Even more than Zed did. “The band is great, Zed. We’ve just had winter break, so we haven’t been doing all that much recently anyway.”

“Well, that’s still good! Are you guys gonna do any performances that you can video call me in for?!” Zedaph clapped his hands excitedly.

“Yeah, actually! Bdubs found us a spot in the town’s spring festival, so we’re gonna perform there!” Impulse grinned before pausing to reiterate himself. “Well, they’re gonna perform, I’m gonna do my tech-guy thing.” Impulse bowed his head sheepishly.

“Still! You’re doing a great job, I’m proud of you, man, I know it must be scary for you,” Zedaph smiled, warm as ever and making Impulse smile too.

“Thanks, man! I appreciate you!” Impulse made a love heart symbol with his hands and aimed it at the screen of his communicator, prompting Zed to do the same.

The two were jolted out of their cute moment by the slamming of the front door and the wails of the ghost, reminding them that they were still playing the game. “Shit!” Impulse cursed, flinging open a closet door and hiding himself in there, quickly followed by Zed.

The pounding of footsteps echoed through Impulse’s headphones, followed by the ghost rattling the closet door violently before dissipating, leaving Impulse and Zed in eerie silence.

“Dude, I think I just shat myself,” Impulse stage-whispered, earning a cackle from Zed.

“We’re awful ghost-hunters, man.” Zed laughed, clutching his sides.

“Yeah, we’re a bit washed.” Impulse smiled.

“Anyway, what else have you been up to?! Hanging out with anyone new?” Zed asked, hopping out of the closet and going to stand outside the house.

Impulse winced as he followed Zed, remembering everything that happened last night with bracing clarity. 

“What happened, Impulse? I just saw your entire face drop!” Zed asked concernedly.

Impulse felt his heart begin to race nervously, while simultaneously feeling happy that Zedaph had managed to notice a tiny change in his expression. While that sort of notice would have sent him into an anxious spiral mere months prior, he was starting to learn that being noticed by the people he loved wasn’t so bad.

Regardless, his stomach still turned at the thought of having to relive last night. At least Zed already knew about Caleb, so he didn’t have to go into detail about that.

“Void, I can’t get anything past you, can I?” Impulse made one final attempt to deflect.

Unfortunately, Zed thwarted his plans. “No, you can’t. Now tell me what’s wrong before I start swimming over!”

“That’s a long swim, bro,” Impulse tried to joke.

“Impulse!” Zed was nearly shouting, desperate for Impulse to just talk . His pleas didn’t go unheard.

“Okay, okay!” Impulse sighed, took a deep breath, and attempted to get it all out as fast as possible. “I was studying with Skizz last night, and I saw someone almost get hit by a car. I started freaking out because… You know-”

“Impulse, you don’t need to explain yourself, I already know why. Keep telling your story, man.” Zed’s comforting voice warmed Impulse’s heart, giving him the strength to finish the story.

“Anyway, Skizz carried me to his house, soothed me for like two hours straight before I spilled my guts, then he proceeded to spill his guts, we cuddled a bit, and then we went to sleep. That’s all, man.” Impulse breathed a sigh of relief, feeling the heat that had suddenly engulfed his body and the excited jitters in his stomach fade away.

“Impulse?” Zed asked, cocking his head to the side. Something about his voice seemed despondent, even disappointed. Impulse had no idea why.

“Yeah?” Impulse replied, raising an eyebrow while trying to stop a confused frown from creeping onto his face.

“Why didn’t you tell me you and Skizz were dating?”

Impulse froze. He felt his brain short-circuit, every logical thought that tried to push through his brain getting firewalled by a burning realisation.

Zedaphs thinks I’m dating Skizz.

Has Impulse and Skizz’s friendship really seemed that romantic? Sure, they had engaged in a lot of physical touch last night, and Skizz always seemed to be looking at him with an indescribable happy expression, and he always seemed to notice every tiny, minuscule detail about Impulse and the split second something changed-

Oh Void.

Now that Impulse had studied it properly, arranged all the pieces in a neat row in his head, he was starting to understand how Zed had come to that conclusion.

“Impulse?” Zed’s voice shocked him back into reality, and Impulse blinked at the communicator screen, an awkward smile on his face.

“Yeah, Zed?”

“Do you like Skizz?”

Impulse hadn’t even realised how red his face had gotten, how a lovestruck smile had overcome his face, all at the realisation of how romantic his and Skizz’s relationship truly was. Impulse immediately reset his facial expression to its usual blank stare, willing the redness to clear from his face. 

But that didn’t stop his heart from pounding, his stomach from being ravaged by butterflies, and his knee from bouncing nervously. All the typical fidgets and feelings he felt around Skizz, and he finally had a word to attribute to it.

But Impulse wasn’t ready to allow himself to think that yet. While he was sure it was true, the implications were too strong, too real . Although he was sure his feelings were reciprocated, he couldn’t be certain . Besides, Skizz was such a natural flirt, maybe Impulse was reading too much into it? Maybe the reality he wanted so desperately would remain just out of his grasp.

Impulse wasn’t even sure that he believed that. His paranoia about how others perceived him had made him acutely aware of how other people acted, and he was starting to see that Skizz did treat him differently from others. 

It was just a matter of patience, of hoping Skizz would initiate so Impulse didn’t have to. 

“Impulse? You awake there, bud?” Zedaph yelled down the communicator, waving wildly at Impulse as he shook his head vigorously.

“Sorry, Zed, I was thinking,” Impulse answered sheepishly.

“I’m right, aren’t I? You like him, or at the very least, he likes you!” Zed beamed, clapping his hands together like he just figured out the secrets of the universe.

“Can’t be sure yet, and I don’t want to label my feelings, but you’re definitely not far off.” Impulse sighed, accepting defeat and the relentless teasing that was sure to follow.

“I KNEW IT!” Zedaph shrieked. “There was literally no heterosexual explanation for him carrying you home, soothing you, and then cuddling you for hours.”

“Void, I can’t believe how oblivious I am. This is a new low, even for me.” Impulse groaned, burying his head in his hands.

“Soooooo, are you gonna tell him?” Zedaph teased, moving closer to the camera so Impulse could see the mischievous twinkle in his eye.

“Nah.”

“Sorry?!”

“No.” Impulse reaffirmed. “I’ve never felt like this before, but I feel like my feelings will disappear if he clearly has no interest in me. Besides, I’m too scared to tell him if I don’t know the outcome anyway.” 

“All fair points,” Zedaph agreed, sighing loudly. “Just tell me if there’s any new developments, okay?”

“I will, I promise.”

“Love ya, I’m going to sleep before I pass out on call.” Zedaph yawned dramatically for effect.

“Okay, love you! Talk soon!” Impulse grinned, shutting off his computer and his communicator simultaneously.

He wandered back over to his bed, flopping down with a contented sigh. Looking up at his ceiling, he allowed himself to giggle and kick his feet.

He thought of Skizz, with beautiful blue eyes that contrast sharply with his black hair. A gleaming smile and a sharp nose, a face that was buried deep in Impulse’s hair as he told Skizz about the worst day of his life. Strong arms and soft wings that enveloped him and rocked him softly, making him feel like everything was going to be okay.

There was no denying that Impulse’s feelings about Skizz were starting to stray away from platonic, moving further and further out of Impulse’s comfort zone and into uncharted territory.

But for the first time in his life, he wasn’t plagued with anxiety about this sudden change in his life. All he felt was free, happy, and excited to see what this new territory would bring to his life. And a small glimmer of hope that Skizz would be excited to explore it with him, too.

Impulse was sure he would be.

Chapter Text

By some miracle or even divine intervention, Impulse had managed to be normal around Skizz for the past week despite his newfound realisation. They had studied together almost every day, attempting to juggle both the looming due date for their calculus project and a test for their Spanish class, which they didn’t take together but had the same teacher for.

Impulse had found himself trying his best to suppress his feelings, acting as normal as he possibly could while his body betrayed him and inched closer to Skizz every single time. While they never got as physically close as they had the night Impulse stayed over, Impulse still ended up with his head on Skizz’s shoulder or a broad white wing tucked around his side on multiple different occasions.

And to Impulse’s credit, he had been handling it well. In his humble opinion, he had been hiding how flustered he was to a moderate degree of success. It was shocking, really, that his usually anxious demeanour somehow dissipated even though his romantic feelings toward Skizz were steadily increasing.

Impulse even had the frame of mind to notice that Skizz had been blushing more, laughing harder at his jokes, and closing the distance between them more and more frequently.

It was probably just because the trauma dumping session had brought them closer together. That was definitely the reason. 

Impulse jumped off the bus, shouting a ‘thank you’ to the driver as he headed towards the school. While the ugly brick walls looked much the same as they had on his first day, today they had a peculiar air of nostalgia about them. Impulse stopped for a moment, taking in the sight of the towering building with the school crest emblazoned on the front.

To his shock, Impulse felt almost sad that the routine of walking off the bus and seeing these walls every day was coming to an end. Sure, there were still about four months to go before the end of the year, but the end was hitting him more suddenly than he thought.

He may actually miss this place. Despite the years he spent hiding from everyone and initiating as few social interactions as he could, the finality of it all was starting to get to him. Impulse wasn’t sure at what point he began to enjoy being here, but he wasn’t going to stop. It was much easier to get through seven hours of school a day when he didn’t hate every second.

Impulse broke out of his trance, heading towards the main door where students were milling about. Entering the school, he found himself pushing his way through the overcrowded hallways, murmuring apologies as he moved past people. Despite the loud volume and increasing heat, Impulse took a deep breath and just tried to make it to his calculus class. 

He looked up as he rounded the final corner, beaming immediately when he saw two familiar faces and one unfamiliar one chatting animatedly about something. “Grian, Scar, what’s up guys?” Impulse called, waving eagerly.

“Well hello there, Impulse!” Scar grinned, gesturing for him to come over. 

“Hey, man,” Grian smiled, patting Impulse on the back.

Impulse smiled at them both before switching his attention to the much taller guy standing next to them. Impulse recognised him as the black-haired, pale boy whom he always saw hanging out with Grian and Scar, even though he couldn’t remember his name. “Whatcha doing, guys?” He asked, shooting the tall boy a smile before turning his attention to Grian and Scar. 

“Waiting for class to start, we didn’t know if Mr Masu was gonna get pissy about us bringing Mumbo in.” Grian grinned, gesturing to Mumbo, who waved awkwardly. “This is Mumbo by the way!”

“Hey!” Impulse waved back, smiling widely. He recognised the anxious behaviour that Impulse exhibited himself, with Mumbo avoiding eye contact and awkwardly running a hand through his hair. “I’m Impulse, nice to meet you dude!” Impulse did his best to make Mumbo as comfortable as possible, and he could tell it was working from the way Mumbo’s posture visibly loosened up. 

“Hello!” Mumbo grinned, still shuffling his feet but seeming much more comfortable.

“Hey, Impulse, I have a question for you, buddy,” Grian straightened up, wings flared, but still smiling.

“Yeah, what’s up, man?” Impulse cocked his head slightly, pushing the small bubble of anxiety down. This was Grian, not someone who was out to get him.

“This might be me overstepping, but you don’t usually go to the cafeteria at lunch, right? I’ve seen you in the library a few times by yourself, no?” Grian started shuffling similarly to Mumbo, clearly worried about seeming rude.

“Yeah, I’m not a fan of big crowds, and the cafeteria is way too loud for my liking.” Impulse didn’t feel uncomfortable about giving this information up; he’d known Grian and Scar for months now. Grian’s question obviously wasn’t coming from an unpleasant motive, as Impulse could tell by how nervous Grian seemed.

“Well, I feel bad that you’re by yourself all the time, and I was wondering if you wanted to hang out with Mumbo and me, and a couple of other guys during lunch? We also don’t spend much time in the cafeteria; the library is much nicer, as you know.” Grian picked at a loose feather, avoiding direct eye contact with Impulse.

Impulse found himself grinning, warmed at the mere idea that Grian noticed he spent a lot of time alone and wanted to change that. It’s not like Impulse was bothered by being alone; he quite enjoyed it. But he wouldn’t be against spending more time with people other than Zed and Skizz, as much as he adored them both. “That’d be nice! Thanks, G!” Impulse replied, smiling and punching Grian lightly on the shoulder.

“Cool! Mumbo and I will meet you outside at the start of lunch.” Grian smiled, playfully flicking Impulse with his wing.

“What about Scar? What’s up with you, buddy?” Impulse turned to look at Scar, who was just watching the interaction with an almost spaced-out grin.

Scar doesn’t respond, still in his own head for whatever reason.

“Scar? Wanna wake up there, buddy?” Grian placed a hand on Scar’s shoulder, squeezing it gently.

“Woah, hey!” Scar snapped back into consciousness with a bewildered look on his face. “What’s the problem?”

“You, mate!” Mumbo chuckled. “Impulse asked why you weren’t hanging out with us at lunch, and you completely spaced on him.”

“Oh, sorry, Impulse!” Scar smiled awkwardly. “Got a lot of stuff going on right now, sorry for ignoring you.”

“You’re good, dude! Don’t stress about it!” Impulse smiled brightly, hoping it seemed comforting. “Where are you at lunch, anyway?”

“Oh, I have an appointment with a neulogy- neuloro- Grian help!” 

“Neurologist, Scar,” Grian smiled fondly.

“Yes, that thing!” Scar sighed sadly. “There’s something wrong with my muscles. I’ve had a hard time at swimming practice recently because of how weak my legs are getting, so my mom is taking me to the neuro-guy because my actual doctor is worried it’s linked to my nerves.”

“Oh, that’s awful, man! I’m sorry,” Impulse smiled sympathetically. “I hope it works out okay.”

“Thanks, Impulse, me too.” Scar sighed, leaning into Mumbo’s side.

The conversation lulled, with Impulse unsure what else he could say to make Scar feel better. That was until two hands slammed down on his shoulder, making him yelp in fright. Impulse whipped around, frowning as he locked eyes with a cackling Skizz.

“Jerk,” Impulse groaned, shoving Skizz away.

“You love me!” Skizz chuckled, slinging an arm around Impulse’s shoulders. “Anyway, what else is new with you, Impy Dimpy Dop?”

“Hey, Skizz! We’re here too!” Grian said sharply, a mischievous glint in his eye. “And what did you just call Impulse?!”

“Hey, buddy! Nice to see you guys!” Skizz grinned, unfazed by Grian’s wit. “I called him Impy Dimpy Dop!”

“Void, I was really hoping I misheard you because that is a diabolical name,” Grian deadpanned, snickering as an indignant look overcame Skizz’s face.

“It’s great! What are you talking about?!” Skizz waved his hands around frustratedly, almost hitting Impulse on the horn. “Sorry, buddy,” Skizz said sheepishly, wrapping his arm tighter around Impulse. Impulse tried his hardest not to blush, but he couldn’t get anything by Grian.

Grian opened his mouth to say something, but promptly closed it and chose to nudge Scar and Mumbo cheekily instead.

Impulse just rolled his eyes, trying to act like he wasn’t about to dissolve into a puddle at the feeling of Skizz holding him close. He felt Skizz’s wing twitch slightly, and Impulse could have sworn Skizz was getting warmer by the second.

It was probably just the close proximity.

The bell rang, shrill and piercing and forcing Impulse to cover his ears. 

“You alright, Impy Dimpy Dop?” Skizz asked quietly, guiding Impulse towards the door.

“I will be when you stop calling me that,” Impulse joked, poking Skizz in the ribs.

“Hey! If you hate the nickname, that means I love it!” Skizz laughed. “That’ll be your name for the rest of your life, homie!”

“Weirdo,” Grian butted in, pushing past them to get in the door.

“This guy.” Skizz rolled his eyes, barging his way in to smack Grian upside the head. Grian squawked, whirling around to tussle with Skizz playfully. 

“What’s wrong with them?” Impulse asked, nudging Scar, who was watching Skizz and Grian smack each other with their wings.

“Dunno,” Scar said dejectedly, his whole body physically drooping.

“Hey, you’re gonna be fine, man.” Impulse put a reassuring hand on Scar’s shoulder. “Your neurologist is gonna clear you, and you’ll go right back to swimming and crushing all those national competitions.”

“Thanks, Impulse.” Scar’s eyes brimmed with tears, but Impulse saw him blink hard and rub his eyes. “I appreciate it.”

“Canada isn’t ready for you, bud,” Impulse grinned.

“I’m gonna crush them!” Scar cheered, his usual happy lilt coming back into his voice.

“You are! Now let’s get our idiots into their seats before Mr Masu comes in here and blows his top.” Impulse grinned, heading over to separate the still-tussling Skizz and Grian and haul them into their seats.

They sat down just as Mr Masu walked in, domineering and cranky as per usual. He immediately began explaining the lesson, only stopping to scold the students who had walked in late.

Luckily, Mr Masu said he was feeling sick and suggested that they could just finish their duo projects. Impulse and Skizz had already finished it the previous Friday, so they didn’t have anything else to do. Thank Void, because Impulse knew he did not have the energy for an 8:30 am calculus lesson.

Grian and Scar were focusing intently, poring over various drawings and calculations that made Impulse’s head spin. He hoped they were nearly done.

“Is anyone home?”

Impulse snapped out of his daydream, turning to look at Skizz, who was tapping on his desk. “Sorry, zoned out.”

“You’re good, buddy.” Skizz smiled down at Impulse in a way that made Impulse’s stomach twist with butterflies. He could feel the heat creeping onto his face, the red making its way up his neck and towards the tips of his ears. Impulse tried desperately to think of something, anything else that would distract him from those piercing blue eyes that turned his brain to mush.

“What were you asking me?” Impulse choked out, trying to feign normalcy even though his brain was running circles around all the what-ifs.

“I was just asking if you’re okay if we start practising three times a week instead of two in the lead-up to the festival? Cause I know that’s a lot and stuff and we have exams, but it’s gotta happen, man.” Skizz exhaled dramatically.

“Oh yeah, that’s fine with me. I don’t do much anyway, it’s all you guys,” Impulse chuckled.

“Don’t say that!” Skizz frowned, crossing his arms. “If it weren’t for you, we wouldn’t have any idea how to set up all the audio stuff!”

“What about Tango and Etho?” Impulse argued back, weirdly determined to prove he wasn’t essential to the band. “They’re good at engineering and stuff!”

“Well yeah…” Skizz paused, trying to think of an argument. “But they’re… dumb and stuff.”

“You just wanted to spend more time with me, didn’t you?” Impulse blurted, his brain temporarily disconnected from his mouth. He was immediately filled with regret, anxiety swirling in his stomach as he stared at Skizz, his eyes wide. Why did he say that? Why did having feelings for Skizz suddenly make him so forward? Impulse tried his best to suppress the heat creeping onto his face, and realised very quickly he was doing much better than Skizz.

Skizz had turned beet-red and was staring at Impulse, eyes blown equally wide. His halo glowed faintly above his head, and his wings were twitching madly. 

Impulse felt his entire brain turn to mush as Skizz’s gaze transformed into something softer, deeper, less startled and more anticipatory and loving. The only question was: what was Skizz waiting for?

Impulse couldn’t bring himself to think about that yet.

The only thing worse than the sickening look of love on Skizz’s face was that he was completely silent. Impulse had never heard Skizz quiet before, let alone silent .

Impulse had really fucked up.

“Anyway!” Impulse tried to pivot, desperate to cut through the weird tension that had filled the air. “Have you guys already picked the setlist?”

“Yeah, yeah, yeah,” Skizz replied, still blushing crimson. “We have four songs so far, we still wanna play one more, but we’re struggling to decide what.”

“Well, what about something from The Cure? Friday, I’m in Love is a classic!” Impulse didn’t mention that he had been playing that song repeatedly ever since he had realised his feelings for Skizz.

“That’s true, dude! That’s a great song!” Skizz clapped his hands excitedly, his wings flapping in an adorable manner that made the butterflies wreak havoc on Impulse’s stomach. “We can ask them at practice later! I already know that one on drums, and I’m sure Tango and Etho can figure it out quickly.”

“Awesome! Can’t wait!” Impulse grinned, quickly reaching out and squeezing Skizz’s hand. 

Instant regret overcame Impulse as Skizz visibly blue-screened, going that familiar shade of red as Skizz looked down at their joined hands.

A tentative question from Grian about their project jerked them both back into reality, and Impulse answered Grian’s question with a smile to pretend like he hadn’t just been possessed.

What was wrong with him? Why did he keep making such embarrassing choices?

Scar’s entry into the conversation helped Impulse act normal as he nodded politely to Scar’s rambling, even though he wasn’t processing a word.

Safe to say, Impulse was grateful when the bell finally rang and he was able to escape this terrible situation. He turned around to shoot a friendly smile at Skizz, but Skizz was just staring back at him with an awestruck look on his face. Impulse gave him an awkward thumbs-up and vanished into the corridor, tail tucked between his legs. 

As much as he loved being around Skizz, this newfound realisation had suddenly started wreaking havoc on their relationship, even though he had been fine for the past week.

Impulse hoped it would be resolved soon, whether through his feelings being suppressed, or another option that filled him with delight to even consider.

It probably wouldn’t happen, though.

…

Impulse approached the library, exhausted from a gruelling study period with a very cranky teacher. Even though he was a senior and was meant to be mostly unsupervised during study hall, today the teacher was in a bad mood and made a point of peering over everyone’s desks to make sure they were working.

He saw Grian and Mumbo waiting outside, yapping about something passionately. Scar’s absence made Impulse’s heart sink a little. He hoped Scar would be okay; Grian and Mumbo weren’t the same without him. From what Impulse had seen, those three were always together outside of class.

“Hey, guys!” Impulse called, waving happily.

“Hey, mate!” Mumbo smiled.

“What’s up, dude?” Grian patted him tentatively on the back.

“Nothin’, just had a terrible study hall with a grumpy teacher, but other than that, nothing.” Impulse chuckled as he remembered two students who had whispered to each other and instantly got yelled at by the teacher.

“Ah, that sucks.” Mumbo smiled sympathetically.

“Yeah, that’s always lame,” Grian sighed. “Anyway! Jimmy and Martyn are in the far corner. I don’t know if you know them, but they’ll introduce themselves regardless.”

“Cool!” The names were vaguely familiar to Impulse, but he couldn’t quite place their faces. Grian led him through the tall bookshelves, weaving between different students and stacks of books until a blond with bright golden wings and another blond with a lime green shirt appeared in front of them.

“Aye-up! I’m Martyn!” The boy in the lime green shirt smiled and stuck his hand out.

Impulse shook his hand tentatively, surprised at how forward Martyn was. Impulse didn’t think he had met another teenager who had actually shaken his hand before. He turned to look at who he guessed was Jimmy, who was rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly. Impulse instantly knew where he had seen Jimmy before. He remembered that Jimmy had been introduced to the band a couple weeks back, but it was only for a split-second and Impulse couldn’t quite remember his face. He did now.

However, he chose not to mention Tango. Skizz had told him that Tango and Jimmy were dating the Monday after their sleepover, but Impulse wasn’t sure if everyone else knew yet.

“Impulse, right?” Jimmy asked tentatively.

“Yeah! You’re Jimmy, yeah?” Impulse smiled.

“Yeah! Nice to see you, dude!” Jimmy grinned back before trying to fall back into his chair. But unbeknownst to him, Grian had snuck behind him and yanked it out from underneath him, sending Jimmy tumbling to the floor. “You!!” Jimmy shouted as he leapt to his feet, pummeling Grian in the chest as Grian cackled wildly.

Martyn and Mumbo were in hysterics, clutching onto each other as they shuddered with laughter. Impulse joined in, giggling hard as Grian and Jimmy tussled playfully. Grian eventually gave up, flopping onto the floor with a laugh.

“Anyway, what’s up with you guys?” Mumbo asked, sitting on a beanbag and stretching his gangly legs across the floor.

“Nothing, just bracing myself for the Spanish test tomorrow,” Jimmy groaned, rubbing his tailbone that he had just landed on. “Next period is the last lesson to prepare, and I think I might be done for.”

Impulse also remembered Jimmy was in his Spanish class. Impulse was fairly sure Jimmy sat in front of him, which was why the two had never really noticed each other properly before. However, Impulse had spent a lot of time observing the people in his classes, even if he didn’t remember names or faces very well. Most of the time he was observing people, it was to see how everyone acted in hopes that he would be able to act somewhat normal, too. 

Now that he could properly recognise Jimmy, he saw that Jimmy had been struggling in Spanish since the start of the year. Impulse had always wanted to try and help, but the anxiety had gotten the better of him every time. That and Jimmy sat with Joel in that class, and Impulse was a bit terrified of him. 

Jimmy seemed nice, and maybe giving him a bit of help wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world. Besides, if Tango was dating him, Jimmy must be decent. Impulse had accidentally overheard about a terrible past relationship of Tango’s, but it seemed like Tango had realised that he could do much better than that previous loser. Basically, Jimmy was definitely a good guy.

Who knows, Impulse could even make a new friend out of offering some help. “Oh! You’re in my class, right, Jimmy?” Impulse tried to sound as friendly as possible.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah!” Jimmy grinned. “Do you know what’s happening? I cannot remember a thing that gets taught in that class.”

“I do!” Impulse grinned back, glad he would be able to help. “My dad speaks Spanish, so he’s been helping me. I’m sure he wouldn’t mind giving you some help as well!” Impulse knew that he could absolutely help Jimmy himself, but he figured some tutoring from a native Spanish speaker would be more beneficial.

“Dude!!!” Jimmy flapped his wings excitedly. “That would be great! Let me know when you’re free and I’ll be there!”

“Cool!” Impulse smiled, glad that Jimmy seemed appreciative. Implying a hangout outside of school hours was a big step considering they had only met twice, but somehow it felt right. Impulse was hardly even anxious to ask. He was moving up in the world.

“Aw, that’s cute,” Martyn commented, grinning at them both. 

“Yeah, I knew Impulse would fit right in.” Grian beamed, flicking Impulse lightly.

“Aw, thanks, guys,” Impulse blushed slightly.

“Oh, Impulse!” Mumbo spoke quickly. “Are you excited for the spring festival? I heard Best was performing, and I know you’re the tech guy for them.”

“Yeah, man!” Impulse felt himself getting more excited. “We have a practice after school to hopefully sort out the final setlist, then it’s crunch time! I don’t have to do much, just press buttons. But I’m excited regardless!”

“That’s not true!” Martyn cut in, staring intently at Impulse. “Mumbo’s our tech guy for the theatre club, and mans is everywhere all at once! I know you do more work than you give yourself credit for.”

Mumbo just looked around at all of them, visibly flustered. “I don’t do that much, mate!” He stammered.

“Mumbo, you literally slave over that play day and night, when you’re not obsessing over the engineering club,” Grian asserted. “You do a lot. ”

“Yeah, dude! Ren and I wouldn’t be able to do anything without your help.” Martyn added, looking over at Mumbo, who was flushing awkwardly.

“Come on, guys! You know I can’t handle onslaughts of compliments like this.” Mumbo curled in on himself, clearly appreciative but still flustered.

Impulse could relate to that one.

“Too bad!” Grian laughed. “It’s not our fault you’re ridiculously good at everything!”

“You’re awful, mate!” Mumbo buried his head in his knees. “I can’t cope with this.” Mumbo’s words were muffled in such a comical way that Impulse had to try and stifle a giggle.

Jimmy wasn’t so subtle, letting a snort erupt that made Mumbo’s head shoot upwards. They stared at each other briefly before Mumbo collapsed into giggles that set the rest of them off.

Only once they all recovered and were done wiping the tears did Mumbo speak again. “Maybe I am funny. My distress seemed pretty funny to you all.”

“AHA!” Martyn yelled. “He admits that he’s talented, finally!”

“About time, dude,” Jimmy added with a smirk.

“You feeling c-aha-lmer after admitting that one, Mumbo?” Grian asked before immediately dissolving into laughter.

“No!” Jimmy immediately yelled. “We’re not bringing this back!”

“Bringing what back?” Impulse asked, cocking his head as the others all tried not to laugh.

“We had this bit a while back where we would just throw ‘aha’ into any word we could,” Grian explained, trying to compose himself. “It got to the point where Jimmy, Martyn and I cracked that joke in biology and laughed so hard we got kicked out.”

“It was bad, dude, I was laughing so hard I nearly fainted.” Martyn stifled a laugh as he reminisced.

Impulse wasn’t quite sure he understood why it was so hilarious, but inside jokes rarely made sense to outsiders. No one would understand Skizz’s ridiculous nicknames like Impulse and Skizz.

“Anyway, Impulse, what songs are you playing at the spring festival, dude?!” Jimmy asked excitedly. “We’ve all been looking forward to your guys’ performance, surely you can tell us one song?”

“I don’t know the whole list cause it isn’t finalised, but I know we’re playing Good Riddance by Green Day!” Impulse beamed as the other four instantly lit up.

“Dude! That is the graduation song!” Grian clapped his hands in synchronisation with his flapping wings.

“Yeah!! I can’t wait to hear it!” Martyn grinned.

“Thanks, guys!” Impulse felt his heart warm. “I hope it lives up to your expectations!”

“I’m sure it will, mate,” Mumbo replied enthusiastically.

“Also, boys, guess what?” Martyn clasped his hands together.

“What?” The four of them chorused.

“I am hosting a party after the spring festival at my house, and I would be honoured if you were all in attendance.”

“I’ll be there! You know I’m always keen for a party!” Jimmy cheered, slinging an arm around Martyn’s shoulders.

“Yeah, New Year's certainly proved that,” Grian joked.

“Hey!” Jimmy spluttered. “I didn’t get that drunk.”

“Whatever helps you sleep at night,” Grian sighed.

“I’ll be there, Martyn! Gotta remember to socialise at some point,” Mumbo chuckled.

“I’ll be there too,” Impulse said meekly. Although his first and only party had gone terribly, he was sure he could handle it this time. He knew way more people now, after all.

“Yay!” The other four chorused, all of them beaming so widely that Impulse felt his heart warm. It was nice to have friends.

The conversation fell into a brief lull before a smirk came over Martyn’s face. “Alright, enough of the small talk!” He exclaimed, turning to Impulse. “I want to know what the deal is with you and Skizz.”

Impulse immediately froze, feeling his face heat up and his tail begin to lash. “What do you mean?” He croaked, instantly realising that he had just exposed himself.

“I KNEW IT!” Grian shrieked. “I knew you liked him!”

“Subtle.” Mumbo deadpanned.

“Sorry, Impulse! I’m just so excited that you finally admitted it.” Grian reached out to gently squeeze Impulse’s shoulder.

“I didn’t admit anything!” Impulse tried to argue.

“Your face gave you away, dude,” Jimmy laughed. “I’ve seen that kinda look far too many times.”

“I bet Tango gives you that look all the time,” Grian sniggered.

“Excuse me?” Jimmy raised an eyebrow.

“Tim, it’s not a secret anymore. Literally everyone knows you guys are dating,” Grian said with a laugh.

“No complaints here!” Jimmy exclaimed. “Everyone should know about my hotshot engineering, game-developing boyfriend.”

“Whatever, Jimmy,” Martyn groaned, clearly having heard this same spiel many times. “Back to the original topic: Impulse, can you and Skizz date already?”

Impulse groaned, burying his head in his hands. “I just don’t think he wants to! He’s the most straightforward person I know. If he wanted to date me, I’m sure he would just ask.”

“Dude, Impulse, listen up, buddy.” Grian turned to grip Impulse by the shoulders tightly. “You flustered that man so badly earlier with one simple sentence that Scar and I saw his red little face in our peripheral vision. He loves you so much it’s physically painful to witness.”

“You saw that, huh?” Impulse murmured.

“Oh yeah.” Grian stared at Impulse intently. 

At least Impulse knew for sure he wasn’t overthinking it. He still didn’t understand what could possibly be holding Skizz back. “But why hasn’t he done anything about it? The guy isn’t one to suppress his emotions.”

“Dude, okay, listen up.” Martyn turned his body to stare at Impulse forcefully. “He was talking to Ren once, and I assumed it was about theatre stuff because he enjoys it, but doesn’t have time to be in the club. And I kid you not, Ren came back to me and said that Skizz spent the entire time raving about you and how good you were at drumming and calculus and basically everything.”

Impulse felt the butterflies wreak havoc on his stomach, praying that they would cease. But Martyn continued speaking.

“Ren even told me that Skizz was as red as a tomato the whole time, and even let slip at one point that he thought you were super cute in general.” Martyn paused to take a breath. “Like, come on! He hardly knew Ren at that time, and he still raved about you for like five minutes straight. So you better not tell me that you’re unsure, because that man is so in love with you.”

Impulse looked around awkwardly, seeing the other three staring at him. Jimmy was grinning like a maniac, Mumbo looked gobsmacked, and Grian was just giving Impulse and ‘I told you so’ look. 

Skizz really did like him. And apparently, it had been obvious to everyone except him.

“What do I doooooooooo?” Impulse groaned, leaning forward and letting himself fall onto the floor.

“Just tell him, it can’t go wrong,” Jimmy suggested, the glee audible in his voice.

“But that’s not what I’m worried about, bro!” Impulse sat up, staring at all of them worriedly. “Why hasn’t he told me?”

“Probably for the same reason you haven’t told him!” Grian remarked. “If you’re anxious about it, I’m sure he is too!”

“Yeah, dude!” Martyn smiled comfortingly. “Just be patient, he’ll get there eventually, or you will.”

“Okay,” Impulse sighed.

Patience. He could try that. Skizz would tell him soon, right? He just had to be patient.

Chapter Text

Scar looked up as Grian rounded the bookshelf noisily. Grian stopped in his tracks, staring at Scar and Mumbo with a distraught expression.

“Guys, I’ve really messed up.” Grian slammed his backpack on the ground and sat down to bury his face in Mumbo’s shoulder.

“It’s not that bad, G!” Scar tried to comfort him, but it fell on deaf ears.

“Yeah, what have you done, mate?” Mumbo questioned.

“Scar! It is that bad!” Grian groaned, dragging his hands down his face. “I was such a dick to Impulse in calculus this morning! Like, seriously, so so mean.” 

“That’s not like you, Grian.” Mumbo cocked his head to the side. “What’d you even say to him?”

“He was so obviously anxious about talking to us, and I just made it worse!” Grian rubbed his eyes. “I was judging him for murmuring, I assumed he was new, even though HE’S BEEN AT THIS SCHOOL SINCE FRESHMAN YEAR, and I was just awful to him.”

“It’s not as bad as you’re making it seem!” Scar didn’t believe that Grian had been that mean. He knew that Grian was always in a bad mood after seeing his extended family, and it wasn’t Grian’s fault if he projected that frustration onto Impulse. “You already told him that you had been in a bad mood this morning. Stop beating yourself up!” Scar reached out to squeeze Grian’s shoulder, but Grian instantly recoiled.

“That’s not an excuse! I had no reason to act like that!” Grian curled into a ball, shielding himself with his wings.

“G, if it was really that bad, I’m sure Skizz would have come for you.” Scar tilted Grian’s face upwards. “From what I can tell, Skizz might be the most upfront person I’ve ever met. If you were truly a meanie, he would have told you off.”

“Yeah, I don’t know Skizz in the slightest, but I do know you, and I know you wouldn’t be rude on purpose.” Mumbo combed through Grian’s wing, trying his best to comfort him.

“Yeah!” Scar chirped. “Besides, you’re so upset about it that it proves you didn’t mean to!”

“That’s true,” Grian sighed. “I just feel bad, dude! Impulse did not deserve that in the slightest. I had only just met him!”

“Just make it up to him tomorrow!” Scar exclaimed. “Be extra nice to him.”

“Yeah! Give him a hug or something!” Mumbo added with a grin.

“Ooh, too upfront,” Scar winced. “Not everyone likes hugs like we do, Mumbo.”

“Ah,” Mumbo replied, tugging at his ear awkwardly.

Grian chuckled, untucking his wings and moving onto a beanbag. “Thanks for the advice, guys.”

“Of course!” Scar beamed.

“Yeah, anytime, mate.” Mumbo reached out to playfully flick Grian’s wing.

“I still feel bad for not realising Impulse had been at this school the whole time,” Grian sighed.

“I don’t think I’ve had him in any of my classes before, and if I did, I had no idea,” Scar replied, trying to think of a single time that he had crossed paths with Impulse. One leapt to the forefront of his mind, which filled him with dread.

Scar vaguely remembered a kid from middle school whose brother had died halfway through seventh grade. Scar was also fairly sure that he had seen the kid crying while walking down the hallway after going to the bathroom. The kid was also probably a demon hybrid; Scar didn’t know of any other hybrids that had both horns and a tail. So, given that Impulse was the only demon hybrid Scar had ever seen at their school, the odds of that kid being Impulse were high.

Connecting the dots made Scar’s headache worsen. He had been plagued by headaches recently, and realising that Impulse had some serious past trauma did not ease it. He just couldn’t figure out if the headache was one of his regular ones or caused by the half-remembered observations coupled with guilt. 

Regardless, Scar chose not to mention this realisation. It wasn’t their business, and would probably make Grian feel even worse.

“Anyway, how did you guys meet Impulse?” Mumbo asked.

“We have a group project in our calculus class, and we all got grouped up,” Grian said. “It seems like a dumb project, but Impulse and Skizz are nice, so it should be fine.”

“We still wish you were in our class!” Scar added, shooting Mumbo a smile. “Can’t believe you’re doing a college calculus class instead of normal calculus.”

“Hey now, my dad forced me to do it! He would never let me beat the asian math genius stereotype,” Mumbo chuckled.

“That’s true,” Scar laughed.

“The class isn’t that hard anyway.” Mumbo joked, yelping when Grian instantly prodded him in the side.

“I hate you and your genius brain.” Grian deadpanned.

“Aw, but he’s just our bright little boy!” Scar squeezed Mumbo’s cheeks, making Mumbo blush instantly.

“Enough compliments! I can’t deal with this!” Mumbo wriggled away, isolating himself in the corner.

Scar just laughed, used to Mumbo’s inability to take a compliment. Scar looked back over at Grian, who was clearly musing about something. “What’s on your mind, G?” Scar asked.

“Did Skizz seem… interested in Impulse to you?” Grian cocked his head to the side.

“Not really, no,” Scar answered. “But you know my spatial awareness isn’t very good,” He added with a laugh.

“Well, I just noticed that Skizz seemed to be staring at Impulse quite a bit, like constantly looking at him with a weird combination of intrigue and attentiveness. I think Skizz might like Impulse.” Grian pondered, absentmindedly stroking his wing.

“I do that to people sometimes; it helps me figure out how people act. Then I can analyse it and copy it to act like everyone else.” 

Scar and Grian turned to look at Mumbo, an aghast expression on Grian’s face and confusion on Scar’s. Mumbo just stared back, bright smile giving way to uncertainty.

“Do you guys not do that?” Mumbo asked hesitantly.

“No,” Scar and Grian chorused.

“Oh,” Mumbo replied, averting their gaze and snapping his fingers in a baffling manner.

“Anyway!” Grian exclaimed brightly, turning back to look at Scar. “Did you really not notice it, Scar?”

“I didn’t, but I’m also the wrong person to ask.” Scar chuckled.

“Fair point.” Grian sighed. “I’ll keep an eye on them, see if they start acting weirder around each other. There hasn’t been any interesting relationship drama since sophomore year. I would love to see some chaotic crushes happening.”

“Yeah, they would also be a cute couple,” Scar mused. “They’re total opposites, it would be sweet.”

“They would be.” Grian grinned. “It’s too soon to tell, though. Skizz could just be one of those people with a really intense stare.”

“How much are you willing to bet they’ll be together before the end of the year?” Scar proposed, already excited at the thought of making some money.

“Twenty dollars,” Grian replied immediately. “What’s your bet?”

“They will get together…” Scar paused, ruminating hard about the timeframe. He really wanted to win this bet. “Before prom!”

“Deal!” Grian grinned, shaking Scar’s hand enthusiastically.

Scar grinned back, delighting in the mischievous glimmer in Grian’s eye. Scar knew he was going to win this bet; he was a master at getting money without working for it.

—

“See you guys!” Skizz called out to Bdubs and Etho, opening the door for Impulse and letting him through before vanishing.

“Buh-bye!” Bdubs yelled. He turned away from the door, looking over at Etho. Bdubs just watched as Etho played a few more notes on the keyboard, hardly even noticing that Skizz and Impulse had just walked out.

“Not even gonna say bye to your friends?” Bdubs joked, laughing when Etho’s head snapped upwards.

“Did they already leave?” Etho stared confusedly at the empty room, save for Bdubs.

“Yes! You’re a terrible friend!” Bdubs exclaimed.

“Oh, my bad,” Etho shrugged. “Wait, when did Tango leave?! He didn’t even say bye!”

“Oh, he hasn’t left yet; he just went pee.” Bdubs chuckled. “The guy has the bladder of a big baby.”

“Yeah, he does.” Etho’s eyes crinkled, a key tell that he was grinning like a maniac.

Bdubs had recently found himself examining Etho more than he usually did, picking up on indiscernible traits that he had previously disregarded. What’s worse was that Bdubs had also been laughing more at Etho’s jokes, wanting to be closer to him more than usual, and feeling a comforting yet terrifying swirl in his stomach every time he saw those damn red and black eyes crinkle with glee.

It felt wrong in the best way possible, like his life was complete and also being ripped apart at the seams whenever Etho so much as looked at him.

Bdubs tried his best not to feel this way, to convince himself that it was wrong. But stupid Etho was just too charming. Bdubs had always been doomed to fall in love with him. It was just ironic that they were best friends for twelve years before Bdubs realised it.

“It’s nice seeing that Impulse has gotten more comfortable with us.” Etho interrupted Bdubs’ spiraling train of thought, which Bdubs definitely appreciated. He didn’t want to allow himself to think the way he currently was.

“Yeah, man! He was so shy at first, but he’s really come out of his shell recently.” Bdubs smiled, thinking of the timid little demon who shook as he spoke, and how he had transformed into a more confident guy who had even started bickering back occasionally. It was wonderful to witness.

“I’m glad he and Skizz sorted their little issue out as well. I’m sure that would’ve made Impulse super anxious, not knowing that Skizz wasn’t ignoring him on purpose.” Etho furrowed his brows slightly.

“Yeah, that sucked. I understand why Skizz was down that day to begin with, and that calculus test definitely wouldn’t have helped him.” Bdubs sighed sadly, remembering the message Skizz had sent him about what people at his old school were saying about him online. It was nasty. “Still sucked that Impulse got the brunt of it though.”

“Yeah, but Skizz said that he felt awful and Impulse forgave him, so it can’t be all bad,” Etho added.

“True!” Bdubs reminded himself that one little mistake wasn’t enough to completely destroy a friendship. “And Impulse is coming to Skizz’s party, which will be fun!”

“Yeah! Can’t wait!” Etho clapped his hands excitedly.

“We’re gonna do matching costumes, right, Etho?” Bdubs proposed nervously. They had done it every Halloween since they were kids, but Bdubs felt anxious about proposing it this year.

“Of course!” Etho reached out to squeeze Bdubs’ shoulder. “Can’t be breaking the tradition now, can we?”

“No, no! I was just checking, y’know, just to be- to make sure.” Bdubs found himself moving closer to Etho, drawn in by the man’s steady gaze.

“I would never want to stop, Bdubs. This tradition is important to me, and so are you.” Etho breathed hard, mere inches from Bdubs now. Etho towered over him, looking down so lovingly Bdubs felt almost sick.

“Good.” Bdubs stuttered out, trying to restrain himself from leaping towards Etho with passionate fervor.

Etho was trembling slightly, moving his hand from Bdubs’ shoulder and down to his waist. He squeezed gently, making Bdubs sputter as he grew more flustered.

“What is happening here?!!” 

Etho and Bdubs split apart, with Bdubs staring red-faced as Tango stood in the door, gesturing to them both wildly.

“Oh, we were just talkin’!” Bdubs croaked out.

“Yeah, I bet.” Tango crossed his arms, tapping his foot expectantly. “What were you talking about?”

“SkizzandImpulse!” Etho said almost unintelligibly.

“Oh, yeah, they were super close together today, weren’t they?” Tango seemed happy enough to change the topic, which Bdubs was very grateful for. He wouldn’t have had the strength to stop himself from kissing Etho silly had Tango not walked in.

“Yeah, yeah!” Bdubs agreed, trying to move on as fast as possible.

“I mean, Skizz was really taking any opportunity he could to be right next to Impulse today,” Tango rambled. “I know it’s absolutely killing him that Impulse isn’t fond of physical touch; it’s Skizz's favourite way of showing his love.”

“You think Skizz likes Impulse?” Etho asked, still stammering slightly.

“Oh, for sure!” Tango grinned, his tail flicking back and forth playfully. “It’s only a matter of time before he cracks and spills his guts to Impulse.”

Now that Bdubs was hearing this, all the pieces began to slide into place. Skizz’s constant chatter about Impulse, his weirdly nervous demeanour when Impulse was around, and their consistently close proximity.

Bdubs’ heart sank as he realised he exhibited almost the exact same behavior towards Etho. If Tango thought Skizz’s actions meant he liked Impulse, where did that place Bdubs regarding Etho?

He wasn’t ready to think about that yet.

“Anyway, you guys go back to whatever you were doing.” Tango wiggled his eyebrows suggestively. “I’m going home!” He grinned at them both, slinging his bag onto his shoulder and exiting the room.

“You think he’s right?” Etho asked, turning back towards Bdubs.

“Probably, but I’m sure Skizz will tell us once he figures it out.” Bdubs knew Skizz was too much of an open book to keep something like that from them. He only wished he had the same courage towards vulnerability.

“Yeah, it’ll be fine.” Etho’s eyes crinkled.

“Anyway, my mom is probably here,” Bdubs smiled, reaching out to grab Etho’s hand. For whatever reason, casual touch never seemed to faze him. “Let’s go, my mom will be happy to drop you home.”

“She better be, I live one street over from you,” Etho laughed.

—

Pearl leaned against her locker, groaning as she realised she had art next. Her portfolio was due in two weeks, and all she had were concept sketches and a half-painted solarpunk village. Screw her brain for getting distracted by Gem’s pretty face every time she was in art.

Although she couldn’t complain too much, the view was great.

“What’s wrong, Pearl?” BigB asked, cocking his head to the side.

“I have art in,” Pearl flicked her wrist so she could see her watch, “eleven minutes.”

“Jeez, counting down the minutes until you can see Gem, are you?” Scott ribbed, laughing as Pearl swatted him.

“Shut up! It’s actually because my portfolio is due soon and I have nothing.” Pearl sighed, dragging her hands down her face.

“And because she’s disgustingly in love with Gem and won’t admit it,” Cleo cackled.

“I hate you all.” Pearl rolled her eyes fondly at her friends.

“You’ll be fine, Pearl.” BigB smiled at her. “I have to analyse food labels in home economics and write an essay about how sugar is bad.”

“At least you won’t be making any more cookies that give me food poisoning,” Pearl teased, giggling as BigB spluttered defenses.

“It’s not my fault that the teacher let me use expired milk!” BigB argued.

“You still let me eat them even though you found out about the expired milk when I was mid-bite!” 

“You looked like you were enjoying them!”

“I was! Until I was throwing up for three days straight!”

“Hey, stop the violence!” Scott cried, forcefully trying to separate Pearl and BigB.

“We’re just joking!” Pearl laughed, giving BigB a side-hug to prove her point. She knew that Scott disliked even mild confrontation, but some light bickering never hurt anyone.

“Yeah!” BigB grinned, wrapping an arm around Pearl’s shoulder. “I still love her!”

Scott just rolled his eyes, playfully poking them both.

“Hey, that’s Skizz, right?” Cleo inquired, gesturing to a white-winged boy walking down the hallway by himself.

Pearl looked up, seeing that it was Skizz. His wings were slightly dishevelled, rogue feathers sticking up sporadically. It wasn’t noticeable, but having Grian as a brother had Pearl attuned to how wings were supposed to look. As Skizz got closer, Pearl could tell that he looked exhausted, dark circles rimming his usually bright blue eyes that were now dulled.

He looked bad. Pearl had no idea what was up, but she wished she knew how to talk to him without overstepping.

“Hey, Skizz!” Cleo called as Skizz walked past, her voice with their usual sing-songy lilt but also accompanied by an uncertain twinge.

“Hi, guys,” Skizz replied, voice drained of his usual enthusiasm. He smiled sadly at all of them, not even stopping to talk before continuing down the hallway.

“Is he okay?” Scott turned to the three of them, concern evident in his gaze.

“Doesn’t seem to be, although I’m not sure why.” BigB sighed dejectedly.

“Where’s Impulse? I usually see them walking together, but I haven’t recently.” Cleo cocked their head to the side, looking similarly concerned.

“No idea, but Impulse has also been super quiet in class since the Halloween party.” Pearl thought back to the lessons after the party, where Impulse hadn’t even shown up until about three days later. Ever since, he had been practically silent, only talking to Pearl whenever he had a question about their assignments. She had just figured he was going through a rough time, and it wasn’t her place to ask.

“Maybe they broke up?” Scott asked. “That would suck though, they’re cute together.”

“They’re not together, mate.” Pearl looked at Scott confusedly. “They never have been.”

“Sorry?!” Cleo exclaimed, looking at Pearl with shock. “Are you kidding?”

“No!” Pearl looked back with equal shock. “Impulse would have told me!”

“I feel like my world has been lit on fire.” Scott wrung his hands dramatically. “Cleo and I have been raving about how cute they are together cause we saw them giggling with each other at the party.”

“They were probably just laughing?” BigB raised an eyebrow.

“No!” Cleo argued. “They were smiling so hard, and Impulse was even blushing a little bit!”

“Are you serious?” Pearl had never considered Impulse and Skizz as a couple, but now that she gave it some thought, they would be cute together. And apparently, they were cute enough that Scott and Cleo had already thought they were together.

“Yes! I wish you could’ve seen it, it was wild. ” Scott giggled to himself. “I’ve been rooting for them behind the scenes for the past month.”

“Well, they’re not together, guys.” Pearl chuckled. “Sorry to burst your bubble.”

“They would be cute, though,” Bigb mused with a smile.

“Well, yeah! We already thought they were dating!” Cleo laughed.

“They would be perfect.” Scott clapped his hands excitedly. “The angel and the demon! The perfect yin-yang situation.”

Pearl grinned, already envisioning Impulse and Skizz as a couple. She would have to find a way to subtly ask Impulse if that was a possibility.

“Pearl, can you set them up? You’re the only one who knows both of them.” Cleo clasped their hands together and stared up at Pearl with shining eyes.

“I could try, but I don’t know them well enough for that,” Pearl giggled.

“Pleaseeeeeeee,” Scott whined, dropping to his knees and mimicking Cleo’s pose.

“You guys are so gossip hungry,” BigB rolled his eyes, but his voice still had a playful tone to it.

“Void forbid we want some spice in our lives,” Scott retorted mischievously.

“I’m not gonna set them up, I’m sure they can figure themselves out eventually.” Pearl lightly kicked Scott and Cleo to get them up. “Now that you mention it, I can see that Impulse clearly feels something for Skizz, so I’m sure he’ll get round to accepting it eventually.”

“Good, good, let us know the moment it happens,” Cleo said, squeezing Pearl’s shoulder affectionately.

The bell ringing sharply jolted them out of their conversation, and their simultaneous groans filled the corridor. Pearl turned around, waving goodbye to her friends as she headed to art.

“Give Gem a kiss for me!” 

“Shut up!”

—

Feathery snowflakes drifted down, coating Gem’s antlers, hair, and face in a thin white layer. She knocked on the door quickly so she could rub her hands together in a desperate attempt to warm herself up. As much as she adored winter and the beautiful white-painted landscapes it brought, the cold was too overbearing sometimes.

The door swung open, revealing Lizzie and Joel smiling brightly at her.

“Hi, Gem!” Lizzie sang, wrapping Gem in a tight hug and guiding her inside.

Gem hugged her back, brushing the snow from her nose quickly before she lost feeling. She looked up to see Joel shuffling his feet awkwardly, and opted to briefly hug him so he didn’t look so pathetic. After releasing the barely reciprocated hug, she stepped back so she could take in their matching Christmas sweaters. They were ugly , but she supposed that was part of the charm.

“Hey, guys! Cute sweaters!” Gem smiled, a mischievous gleam in her eye.

“Don’t lie, Gem,” Joel groaned. 

“I would never ,” Gem winked. Spinning around to orientate herself, she made her way to Lizzie’s room so she could crash onto the bed. 

She shoved the door open, sighing dramatically as she saw that Jimmy had already made himself at home. He looked up as Gem walked in, grinning and spreading his wings further across the bed.

“You’re moving.” Gem deadpanned, walking over and sitting directly on a sprawling golden wing.

“Ow!” Jimmy yelped, shoving her away so he could readjust. “You didn’t have to do that!”

“I did,” Gem smirked.

“What did she do to you, babe?” Joel questioned, narrowing his eyes at Gem. “Do I have to kick her out already?”

“You can’t kick her out, it’s my house!” Lizzie retorted indignantly. “And I thought I was your babe.”

“Jimmy will always be my number one babe,” Joel teased, sitting on the bed himself and dragging Lizzie down with him.

“Why are you even dating me at this point? Just date Jimmy already!” Lizzie rolled her eyes, but her joking tone and wide smile indicated that she didn’t care. She and Gem knew better than to try to separate Joel and Jimmy.

“Anyway, what have you been up to this break, Gem? Haven’t seen you for a week!” Jimmy flared his wings, smiling at Gem.

“Nothing, really. Went to the ski slopes on the weekend, hung out with Grian yesterday; we had a nice gossip.” Gem tried to rack her brain for anything else she had done, but that was all. “Yeah. That’s it.”

“You hang out with Grian a lot, do you guys like each other or somethin’?” Joel raised an eyebrow.

“You must be kidding.” Gem raised her eyebrow even higher, staring at Joel with disappointment. “You’re always complaining about how much I talk about Pearl, and you think I like Grian ?!”

“Yeah, get with the times, babe!” Lizzie prodded Joel playfully.

“Sorry! You know I’m forgetful!” Joel groaned.

“Anyway, what did you guys gossip about?” Lizzie asked, moving away from Joel so she could sit up properly.

Gem rolled her eyes. Lizzie was nothing if not a gossip fiend. “Just Skizz and Impulse. Grian spent our entire hangout complaining about how sickeningly in love they are.”

“Oh, yeah. It’s bad.” Jimmy laughed. “Tango complains about them all the time, and from what I’ve heard, they’re both too chicken to tell each other.”

“I hardly know them, but I’ve seen them walking around, and I was fully convinced that they had been dating for months.” Lizzie grinned. “They just look so perfect together!”

“They do!” Gem gushed, thinking back to all the times that Skizz had started rambling about Impulse and she had teased him relentlessly for it. She was determined to get Skizz to admit his feelings, even if it was just to her. “I wish they were coming to the New Year’s Party so we could leave them alone right before the clock hits midnight.”

“You know I love to cause some carnage!” Joel rubbed his hands together excitedly. “Although they would probably just get together, and it would be disgustingly cute from what you guys have said.”

“They’re already disgustingly cute!” Gem hummed, getting excited at the mere prospect of them dating for real. “I need them to stop being scared and just kiss !”

“Me too,” Jimmy beamed. “From the one time I met them together, they just seem like such a good match. And Skizz is so obviously in love with him, too.”

“Oh, yeah.” Gem agreed. “It’s bad.”

“You’re no better!” Joel retorted, crossing his arms and staring at Gem. “You’ve been pining over Pearl for months , and still haven’t made a move!”

“Oh, so now you remember?” Gem teased with a nervous giggle. Unfortunately for her, Joel was correct. She really had to make a move on Pearl at some point. But deflecting was much more fun.

“Oh, come on, Gem!” Lizzie backed up her boyfriend. “New Year's is right around the corner, maybe it’s finally time!”

“Maybe,” Gem mused. “It would be cute to kiss Pearl for the first time on New Year’s. It’s scary, though.”

“Just do it!” Joel said enthusiastically. “I did that with Lizzie, and now we’ve been together for nearly five years!”

“So we’re just not gonna mention Etho, then?” Jimmy sniggered.

“I hate you.” Joel looked at Jimmy with a pointed glare before flipping him off.

“What happened with Etho? I haven’t been friends with you guys long enough!” Gem whined, staring at them all with pleading eyes.

“Don’t worry about it,” Joel and Lizzie chorused, staring at each other with crimson faces.

“You guys are mean!” Gem cried.

“It’s just too embarrassing,” Lizzie replied, squeezing Gem’s shoulder. “For Joel, at least.”

“Whatever,” Joel groaned.

“Anyway, does anyone want to place bets on when Skizz and Impulse will start dating?” Jimmy asked, a cheeky grin appearing on his face.

“From what Grian’s told me, it’ll happen so soon there’s no point placing bets.” Gem sighed. She knew she was passing up an opportunity to make a quick twenty dollars, but she didn’t think there was a point. For all she knew, it had already happened during the break without her knowing. Besides, she and Lizzie had a job, unlike their two unemployed friends.

“Fine.” Jimmy sulked, crossing his arms like a cranky toddler. “Rooting for them anyway.”

“Me too, they would be super cute!” Lizzie grinned excitedly.

“They would.” Gem knew she would personally go yell at Skizz if he didn’t ask out Impulse within the next month.

“Anyway, do you guys wanna watch Home Alone?” Lizzie asked, already getting up to grab her laptop. “Gotta keep the tradition going!”

“Sure, if you and Joel promise not to start kissing midway,” Jimmy teased.

“Can’t promise that, Lizzie is just too irresistible.” Joel wiggled his eyebrows, already reaching out for Lizzie.

“Gross.” Gem rolled her eyes. She settled into the pillows as the movie came on, and Joel and Lizzie already started canoodling.

She hoped something similar would come her way soon. And she hoped that Skizz and Impulse would finally get there as well. Preferably soon. She was an impatient girl.

—

Martyn relished in the breeze that sifted through his hair, crisp and piercing but somehow comforting. He spotted Ren in the distance, leaning against a tree with a sketchbook pressed against his knees. Ren was staring at it intently, his hand moving sporadically to draw another line. At least, that’s what Martyn assumed he was doing. He hadn’t the faintest clue about drawing.

Laughter bubbled in his chest as he towered over Ren, who was seemingly unaware of Martyn’s presence. “Fancy seein’ you here!” Martyn yelled, immediately chuckling as Ren jumped out of his skin, furred ears perked up, and tail thumping against the ground.

“Oh, hey, Martyn!” Ren grinned, blinking hard as he stared up at Martyn. “What’s up, dude?”

“Nothing, I had a diabolical biology test earlier that I probably got a C minus on, but you live and you learn.” Martyn shrugged, plonking himself down next to Ren.

“Aw, that sucks, dude.” Ren rubbed Martyn’s shoulder sympathetically. “I’m sure there’ll be more for you to ace.”

“Not my problem, I’ve never claimed to be good at biology,” Martyn laughed. “Having Jimmy and Grian in my class also doesn’t help our collective productivity.”

“Yeah, that's no help.” Ren thumped his tail onto Martyn’s outstretched leg, a gesture of comfort that warmed Martyn’s heart, but also made it yearn for what they once had.

It wasn't that he regretted ending things with Ren; they had become far too codependent on each other. Martyn knew that if their relationship had progressed, their friendship would be irreparable. Breaking up with him before they got to that point was his last bid to at least salvage that. Besides, both Martyn and Ren had agreed that they would get back together at some point; they just had to learn to be separate people instead of one and the same.

Martyn didn’t regret it too much. His feelings for Ren were still as strong as ever; that wasn’t up for debate. However, staying friends and coping with the casual physical touch proved to be mighty difficult. Martyn just had to remind himself that it would all be worth it.

Suddenly aware of his extended silence, Martyn chose this moment to tell Ren about the new developments with his party. “Oh, by the way, I hung out with Impulse the other day and invited him and the Best band to my party.”

“Oh, cool, dude!” Ren flashed his signature smile that never failed to make Martyn’s heart flutter. “I didn’t know you were tight with Impulse.”

“I’m not, really. Grian noticed he was in the library a lot by himself, so he invited him to hang out with us.” Martyn sighed and leaned his head against the tree. As much as he loved Grian, Jimmy, and Mumbo, all he wanted to do was spend time with Ren. But he knew that they couldn’t spend every second together, otherwise they would never get anywhere.

“Aw, that’s nice of him,” Ren said warmly.

“Yeah, it’s just like Grian to notice something like that,” Martyn smiled.

“Yo, dude?!” Ren perked up, his tail wagging slightly. “Is Impulse the one that Skizz has a massive crush on?”

“Oh yeah, and Impulse also has a massive crush on Skizz,” Martyn smirked cheekily. “He was telling all of us about how he wasn’t sure what to do, and let me tell you, mans was red .”

“Oooooooh!” Ren rubbed his hands together. “It’s gettin’ hot in heeeeere!”

“It really is. Impulse just needs to buck up a little, cause I already told him that Skizz went on a massive rant about him to you.” 

“Dude, it was insane.” Ren chuckled, twisting around so he was facing Martyn. “I have never seen a man get so flustered by simply talking about someone they liked. He didn’t even have to admit his feelings; it was so obvious.”

“Yeah, same with Impulse. He was flustered the second I mentioned Skizz.” Martyn thought back to Impulse’s red little face and tried his best to stifle a laugh. He didn’t want to be too mean.

“They need to get together, dude. Somehow, an angel and a demon being together just fits perfectly.” Ren waved his hands around theatrically. “It’s meant to be!” He announced.

“Opposites do attract after all,” Martyn joked. 

“We need to set them up or something, dude!” Ren exclaimed.

“Nah, I’m sure they’ll be together within the next week. Feelings that strong are hard to suppress.” Martyn stared at Ren intently, trying to communicate his feelings without speaking.

Ren just stared back, his steady gaze telling Martyn all he needed to know. Ren felt exactly the same as him. He didn’t even need to vocalise it, they knew each other so extensively that they had their own language of comforting, casual touch and intent stares.  Hopefully, they would work it out soon. Because trying to act like friends when all Martyn wanted to do was kiss the breath out of Ren was torturous.

“Anyway, that makes sense, dude.” Ren agreed, breaking eye contact and awkwardly staring at the ground. “They’ll sort themselves out.”

“They will. Besides, based on Grian’s very excited reaction, we’re not the only ones rooting for them. Grian is absolutely the type to pull some strings to make them kiss.” Martyn chuckled, imagining Grian holding a sprig of mistletoe over Impulse and Skizz and laughing at their embarrassment. Impulse and Skizz should count themselves lucky that Christmas was over.

“Good, good, good. In the meantime, I’m gonna hype Skizz up so he can get a move on.” Ren grinned cheekily.

“Sounds good to me!” Martyn stared at the entrance to the school, which now had a steady stream of students walking away from it. Excited chatter filled the area as student after student walked by, all presumably heading home.

“Dude, is that Skizz and Impulse there?” Ren reached out to tilt Martyn’s face to the right slightly. Martyn tried his best not to shiver, but goosebumps immediately sprang up on his whole body. He looked to where Ren was pointing, and realised that Ren was right.

Impulse and Skizz were walking remarkably close together, with Impulse rambling about something animatedly and Skizz just staring down at him with a ridiculously loving smile. Skizz had his wing positioned behind Impulse’s back, fluffy white feathers just barely cradling Impulse.

“Void, that is the most sickening and cute thing I’ve ever seen,” Martyn groaned. “How have neither of them made a move?!”

“Maybe they have, and just haven’t told anyone?” Ren mused, staring at Impulse and Skizz while they vanished into the distance.

“That’d be funny. It has been a few days since I talked to Impulse.” Martyn sighed, leaning back against the tree. 

“Yeah, maybe they’re trolling all of us, dude!” Ren laughed.

“They better be,” Martyn said jokingly. “I’m gonna have a very stern word with them at the party if they aren’t together yet.”

“It’s not like we would be able to tell anyway. They’re so close together all the time, their relationship status is a complete mystery.” Ren just rolled his eyes fondly.

“They should join the theatre club! With acting skills like that, we could cast them as the leads in anything!” Martyn dissolved into laughter. 

Ren also cracked up, his beautiful, harmonic laugh doing a number on Martyn’s ears. He hoped that Impulse and Skizz would work it out. He knew better than most how frustrating it was to be in love with your best friend. 

Besides, Martyn was sure he and Ren weren’t the only ones rooting for Impulse and Skizz. It seemed like everyone was silently—or not so silently, in Grian’s case—rooting for them to get together.

Martyn was sure it would work out for them.

Chapter Text

Impulse stood on his tiptoes, barely reaching the lid of the trunk.

“Let me get that for you, buddy.” Skizz guided Impulse to the side, hardly raising his arm to close the trunk of the car with a slam. He shot Impulse a smug smile, crossing his arms and looking Impulse up and down.

Impulse could feel himself beginning to blush, but he was determined not to let Skizz fluster him. “I was gonna do it, you know!” He tried to argue.

“Oh, I’m sure. It’s not like your fingertips were barely over the top or anything,” Skizz teased.

“It’s not my fault your stupid new SUV is like six feet tall!” He swatted at Skizz. “Your old car was built for five-eight people!”

“You just gotta grow a little, homie!” Skizz snickered back. “Reach my supermanly height of six-foot-one, what's up?!”

“Oh, yeah?” He moved closer, inches from Skizz, staring up at him with a devilish smirk. “Are you gonna act all manly when I do this?” He grabbed the back of Skizz’s head and dragged it downwards, dragging his claws along the pressure point on his neck where he knew Skizz was outrageously ticklish.

He instantly screeched, reaching an octave Impulse didn’t know was possible. Skizz stared at Impulse, wings flared in shock and his eyes brimming with utter betrayal and twisted glee. “You suck! I told you about that in confidence!”

“Oh, come on! I found out about it when I tried to get your attention and you screamed the library down!” Impulse doubled over with laughter, both from that memory and the scream Skizz just did that could rival an opera singer.

“Can you guys stop flirting and get in the car?!” Tango shouted, emerging from the backseat to stare at them both, clearly unimpressed. “Us three are being squeezed to death in the back; it would be nice if we could get going this millennium!”

“You’re fine, quit your whining!” Skizz groaned, dramatically barging past Tango to get in the driver's seat.

Impulse followed suit, making his way round and clambering into the passenger seat. How he had avoided being in the back when Tango and Etho were both taller than him, he had no clue.

Well, he had some clue. He just didn’t quite believe it.

“I can’t believe it’s the day!” Bdubs hollered as Skizz started the car and pulled out of the driveway.

“It is today, Bdubs! Friday, March twenty-first.” Etho chuckled.

“Shut up!” Bdubs smacked him playfully. “I mean that it’s the day we’ve been working towards for the past two and a half months!”

“Void, I’m so nervous,” Tango remarked nervously, biting his nails. “What if I stuff it up?”

“You won’t stuff it up, Top!” Skizz called, smiling into the rearview mirror. “Besides, even if you do, no one’s gonna notice!”

“Oh, shut up, Mr I-don’t-get-nervous-ever!” Tango scoffed, crossing his arms and staring out the window.

Impulse chuckled, used to the group’s incessant bickering. He was just trying to stop himself from having a full-blown panic attack at the thought of being on stage in front of their entire town. Sure, all he had to do was set up, but what if a speaker blew in the middle of the performance? What if something unplugged? He wasn’t sure he had the guts to go on stage in the middle of the performance.

Other than that, he was excited. He hadn’t been to the spring festival since he was twelve, but he remembered it being fun. Mainly due to the delicious cotton candy. But he had gone with his family every year, and after Caleb died, it didn't feel right anymore.

Impulse hoped this year would reinvigorate his love for festivals.

“You alright there, Impy Dimpy Dop?” Skizz reached out to squeeze his shoulder affectionately.

Impulse rolled his eyes, still disbelieving that Skizz had actually committed to calling him that for the past two months. “I’m okay, man. Just stressed.” Regardless, he was glad that Skizz had noticed his tension. Although it was no secret to Impulse that Skizz noticed every minuscule detail about him.

He was just too afraid to ask why. It wasn’t the emotional vulnerability he feared, but merely that he was so self-absorbed he had convinced himself Skizz liked him back. He would need much more concrete evidence of Skizz’s affections before he tried anything.

“That’s fair enough, it is pretty daunting,” Skizz smiled, his crinkled blue eyes and small dimple in his cheek making Impulse’s stomach turn with longing.

It was a miracle that he had managed to suppress his feelings for so long. Being subjected to that dazzling smile every single day for the past two months? Hell. He was losing his mind.

“Why weren’t you that nice to me?!” Tango borderline shouted, leaning forward to stare at Skizz indignantly.

“You know why!” Etho chuckled, shooting a cheeky grin in Tango’s direction.

“Why?” Impulse questioned, raising an eyebrow and looking between Etho and Tango. “Am I missing something?”

Tango instantly stifled a laugh, turning light red from the effort. Impulse could hear a slight wheeze in his breathing, which did not sound good.

Etho was seemingly unaffected, but that was just because he had his usual mask on. Impulse could see his rapidly bouncing knee, his violently twitching fingers, and how his gaze shifted between Skizz and Impulse with a twinkle in his eye.

He followed Etho’s gaze, and laid his eyes on a sight that filled him with utmost confusion.

Skizz was red. Deep crimson that emerged from underneath his form-fitting white shirt—what a beautiful sight that was—and crept up his neck all the way to his cheeks. His wings, while pressed against the seat of the car, were twitching forcefully to the point where they were borderline flapping. He gripped the wheel tightly, knuckles turning white from the effort.

Worst of all, everyone in the car was noticeably silent. That did not help his anxiety about being excluded from the joke.

“Hello? Anyone home?” He looked around at all of them, very much confused. “What are you guys not sharing?”

“Nothing!” The four of them chorused shakily, all avoiding eye contact.

It was shit like this that made Impulse want to rip his horns out of his head. How was he meant to know if Skizz liked him when they wouldn’t even tell him the littlest things?

Or did Skizz actually like him, and was too embarrassed to admit it to anyone except his friends?

He was too anxious to ruminate about either option.

Whether it was because of the thick tension that began to suffocate the car or the sudden silence that overcame all five of them, not another word was spoken for the rest of the ten-minute drive.

…

“This is us, boys!” Bdubs called excitedly, gesturing towards the stage and reaching out to grab Etho’s hand.

“Cool!” Tango responded, jogging slightly to catch up with them.

Impulse stayed behind, slowly following while wearily dragging a suitcase full of tangled cables and miscellaneous equipment over uneven grass. 

“Give me that!” Skizz wrenched the suitcase out of Impulse’s hands with a playful grin. He looped his own duffel bag over the suitcase handle and proceeded to drag them both along the ground with very attractive ease.

“Thanks,” Impulse smiled, already feeling himself redden at the sight of Skizz’s flexed muscles. He really had to get himself together. Maybe he should start going to the gym as a distraction. And because he was sick of being a twig.

“No problem, buddy!” Skizz smiled and slowed his pace slightly, keeping in time with Impulse’s steps.

They approached the stage, and Impulse watched as Skizz flung both bags four feet up onto the stage like it was nothing. His blushing only worsened as Skizz gestured for him to come closer, before holding him by the waist and hoisting him up, again like it was nothing.

It was safe to say that strong men were his weakness. Or maybe it was just specifically Skizz.

“Right, what do you want us to do, Impy?” Tango breathed heavily, his tail flicking back and forth from the effort of dragging everything onto the stage.

“Just unpack all your stuff, and I’ll have the speakers and amps ready for you to plug into in about ten minutes!” He turned away, swiftly unpacking everything. The crowd was already forming, and he had no intention of being on display like this for any longer than necessary.

“Bdubs, what time are we on?” Skizz called, the whoosh of his wings and a thump on the ground reaching Impulse’s ears.

“7:45 boys!” Bdubs cheered, jumping up and down. “So in—” He flicked his wrist to check his watch “—fifty seven minutes!”

“Awesome! Gives me loads of time to set up my drums!” Skizz shouted cheerily before walking back towards the car.

Impulse busied himself for the next half an hour, untangling cables and plugging them into almost completely obscured outlets. He enjoyed the routine and the peace that came with it, speaking only occasionally to answer one of the others’ questions. Before he knew it, they were done with about twenty five minutes to spare.

Etho’s signature “Oh snappers” hit his ears, and he turned to see that the crowd size had increased. Massively.

Before, the crowd had been sparse, maybe one hundred odd people milling about in the designated festival space. But now there were upwards of a thousand people, all tightly packed in and moving from carnival rides to food stalls.

This was fine. Impulse wasn’t freaking out. Not at all.

Like clockwork, an arm was tucked around Impulse’s shoulder, a wing brushing his back, and a warm body pressed close to his. 

“How you feelin’, buddy? I know you don’t like big crowds.” The soft, familiar voice spoke, pushing his face into Impulse’s hair.

Skizz’s ability to sense the most imperceptible changes in his anxiety levels was getting insane. Impulse was sure he would explode soon. Seriously, how could one man be this observant, this caring, and this good-looking? It was a crime.

He was still too scared to say that out loud. “I’m fine, it’s just a lot more people than before.”

“Fair enough.” Skizz squeezed him slightly harder. “You wanna go wait by the car? There shouldn’t be too many people in the parking lot.”

“Yeah, that would help.” Impulse smiled, moving to the edge of the stage so he could jump off.

“Don’t you dare!” Skizz held him back, jumping down himself and then holding out his arms to catch Impulse.

“It’s like, three feet!” Impulse gestured wildly towards the small height.

“Come on, man! Let me catch you!” Skizz insisted, making grabby motions towards him.

He obliged, leaning forward so Skizz could grab him and place him gently on the ground. “What a gentleman,” He teased, grabbing Skizz’s hand and dragging him to the parking lot.

Luckily for him, the stage exit to the parking lot was mostly free of people, and the short walk only involved having to tell one person to excuse them. And of course, Skizz ultimately found his way in front of Impulse, guiding both of them until the car appeared in front of them.

“Well hello there!” Scar called, waving them over. Despite his new cane, Scar was still upbeat as ever and only tumbled slightly. Grian was, of course, there to catch him, wrapping an arm around Scar’s waist and similarly waving.

Impulse grinned, trying to ignore the twinge of sympathy. “Hey, guys! How are you doing, Scar?”

“Oh, you know, tired and sore, and I’ve really been missing swimming recently.” A wistful expression overcame his gaze. “But I’m getting used to it, and I’ll get used to the wheelchair when that arrives too.” Scar smiled brightly, unwavering determination emanating off him in strong waves.

Impulse deeply admired Scar for that. He knew he wouldn’t be able to stay this positive if something like this were to happen to him.

“Hey, Sir Scar! G-Sharp!” Skizz interjected, giving them both brief hugs. “How are we doing on this fine day?”

“Oh, we are very excited to see your performance! Always nice to see professionals at work,” Scar smiled, leaning against Skizz’s car.

“Oh, stop it!” Skizz waved him off. “Too much flattery.”

“I’ll switch it up then,” Grian said with a glint in his eye. “Why on earth do you have a monster truck?!”

“That’s what I’m saying, dude!” Impulse agreed, glad that someone finally recognised the ludicrousness that was Skizz’s SUV. “Why so huge?”

“I just wanted a big car, man. I’m a big guy!” Skizz cried. “Besides, my family all pitched in to help me buy it for my birthday.”

“Aw, that’s cute,” another familiar voice called.

Impulse turned to see Gem approaching, accompanied by Jimmy and Pearl. He waved at them both, earning bright smiles in return.

“Well, well, well, look what the cat dragged in,” Grian teased, staring at Jimmy and Pearl with playful disgust.

“It’s not our fault you were too impatient to wait for us! We live in the same house, man,” Pearl whined, flicking Grian’s wing.

“Yeah, but Tim doesn’t live with us!” Grian argued back.

“I live two doors down, brother!” Jimmy shouted, wings flapping agitatedly.

“Yeah! We’re lucky Gem was kind enough to give us a ride!” Pearl added, crossing her arms and staring at Grian, unimpressed.

“Oh, I didn’t know you got your licence, Gem?!” Impulse clapped excitedly.

“Just last week!” Gem beamed. “I finally get to drive my cute little Beetle around without my dad in the car!”

“See, Skizz, that’s a normal-sized car!” Grian quipped.

“Whatever, man! I love my monster truck!” Skizz groaned, joining Scar to lean against the hood.

Impulse sighed happily. Sure, he had come here to escape the crowd, but being surrounded by his friends didn’t count as a crowd. He moved towards Skizz to lean against him, tired from setting up the band technology for half an hour straight. And of course, his first instinct when he felt any kind of negative emotion was to go to Skizz for comfort.

This was a fact obvious to everyone, based on the ‘subtle’ nudges and grins the others all gave each other as they looked towards his head against Skizz’s shoulder.

“See something you like?” Skizz joked, wrapping an arm around Impulse and flexing his other bicep.

“Sure, buddy,” Gem remarked.

“Anyway, does anyone want to quickly poke around the festival before your performance starts?” Pearl asked, looking around hopefully. “I’ve only been to this once before.”

“Yeah, I’ll join you!” Scar propped himself up enthusiastically. “People usually make way for me because of my cane, it should be fine!”

“I’ll come too!” Jimmy piped up. “I’m sure Joel and Lizzie are around here somewhere.”

“I should probably go too, we’re on in ten minutes and the others will want to know where I’ve gone.” Skizz sighed, moving away from Impulse.

Impulse instantly despised the absence of Skizz’s warm body, but he didn’t want to seem too needy.

“I’ll stay with you, Impy! I can’t be bothered with that big crowd,” Gem smiled.

“Yeah, me neither,” Grian agreed, moving to take Skizz’s spot so he could lean against the car.

“Cool! See you guys during the performance, or at the party!” Pearl smiled, walking towards the main entrance.

Jimmy and Scar waved heartily, slowly following after Pearl to accommodate Scar’s slower pace.

“Bye, Impy Dimpy Dop!” Skizz grinned, walking off in the other direction but looking back multiple times.

Once Skizz was out of earshot, Grian and Gem turned to look at Impulse with identical evil grins. 

“That man really loves you, huh?” Gem giggled.

“I’m starting to think so,” He groaned.

“What are you groaning for?!” Grian questioned insistently. “You like him!”

“Oh, yeah. It’s consuming my life.” Impulse buried his head in his hands so forcefully that he almost stabbed himself with his horn. 

“Quite frankly, I don’t see the problem.” Impulse peeked through his fingers to see Grian shrug emphatically. “Why haven’t you just told him?”

“Scared of rejection,” he murmured.

“Aren’t we all?” Gem quipped.

“Shut up, Gem!” Grian swatted her with his wing. “All you had to do was look at Pearl, and she was yours!”

“She’s so pathetic, I love her.” Gem giggled happily.

“So, does anyone want to coerce Skizz into asking me out?” Impulse asked, dragging his hands down his face.

“I will!” Gem clapped excitedly. 

“I still maintain that you should take matters into your own hands.” Grian shrugged.

“I might have to if he keeps this up! I did not take him for a coward; the guy wears his heart on his sleeve,” Impulse chuckled.

“He’ll get there, don’t worry about it, Impy.” Gem squeezed his shoulder fondly.

“Anyone want a Jaffa cake?” Grian dangled a blue and orange package in front of them with a cheeky grin.

“Gimme it! I haven’t had one in so long!” Gem lunged for the packet, ripping it open while Grian stared at her like she had just killed his family.

“Anyway—” Impulse leaned back, not wanting to get involved in the oncoming argument, “—What are they, G?”

“Spongy, orangey, chocolatey, biscuity, incredibleness,” Grian took the package back, earning an evil glare from Gem. He held it out to Impulse, wiggling his eyebrows excitedly.

“They’re really good, Impy!” Gem murmured, words muffled by a mouthful of cookie.

Impulse took one tentatively, taking a small bite and immediately dissolving into spongy, orange bliss. “Where can I get these?!!”

“The UK,” Grian groaned. “I bought like six packets when I was over there, and I only have three left.”

“Didn’t you come back last week?!” Gem stared at Grian, eyes wide.

“Yeah? Your point?”

“Greedy.”

“You know it!”

“Can I buy one of these packets off you?!” Impulse laughed as Gem and Grian stared at each other cheekily.

“Yeah, for fifty dollars!” Grian snickered. “I’m not giving these up that easily!”

“You suck!” Impulse sighed, the biscuit now completely gone. 

Pulling his communicator from his pocket, he went slack-jawed as the time read 7:38 pm. “Shit, we gotta go!” He briefly flicked his communicator towards them before turning heel and running.

“Coming!” Gem yelled from behind him, the faint sound of biscuits being shoved into a bag and wings catching the wind indicating Grian was also on the way.

Impulse sprinted towards the stage, cold wind rushing past him and his feet hitting the ground hard. He tried his best not to tumble over his own jeans to a moderate degree of success, rounding the final corner and slipping slightly. The crowd grew larger, with Impulse trying not to freak out as the multitude of bodies squeezed him in.

The entrance finally neared, familiar faces filling his view as he slid into the VIP section. Thank Void he had a less crowded space to watch from; he knew he would have hated being jammed in with the main crowd.

“Bit tired,” Grian huffed, leaning over and pressing his hands to his knees.

“Unfit, are we?” Gem grinned, breathing hard but smiling brightly.

“I haven’t been able to play badminton in a month!” Grian argued, looking back up and smiling as he saw Jimmy exit the stage giving Tango a fleeting kiss. “Look at those stupids.”

“Void, they’re so cute,” Gem gushed, grinning cheekily as Jimmy came to join them.

“Hey, guys!” He waved, still blushing up at Tango, who was taking his place to the left of Bdubs.

“You’re such a sap,” Gem teased.

“You would be too if your boyfriend were an electric-guitar-playing work of art!” Jimmy blushed harder, his wings flapping excitedly.

“My girlfriend can paint anything she sets her eye on; I’d argue that’s a much better talent!” She prodded Jimmy playfully.

“What about your boyfriend, Impulse?” Grian nudged him with a twinkle in his eye. “How are his drumming skills?”

“Enough!” He groaned, shoving Grian away. Much to his dismay, his gaze immediately resumed on Skizz, taking in the sight of him seated at his drums and spinning the sticks in his fingers.

“You are something else, brother,” Jimmy doubled over with laughter. “You didn’t even pay attention to Grian for a second before looking back at Skizz!”

“Void forbid a guy enjoys the view.” Impulse wiggled his eyebrows up and down, resulting in simultaneous groans from the other three.

“This is sickening.” Grian deadpanned. “I don’t know how you can stand it.”

“You should all be proud of me for lasting this long,” Impulse said, dramatically dropping his tail so it dragged along the floor.

“We are, buddy,” Gem giggled.

The sound of Bdubs tapping the mic silenced the crowd, animated chattering fading into a dull hum of occasional murmuring. Impulse looked up at Bdubs, who was staring out at the crowd with his signature beaming grin.

“Well, well, well, welcome everybody to the debut of the Best band on this lovely spring evening!” he called effortlessly, his commanding voice demonstrating pure confidence.

The crowd clapped excitedly, with Grian and Jimmy wolf-whistling while Gem and Impulse cheered.

“Thank you for the lovely reception!” Bdubs grinned excitedly. “You may be wondering, how big could our egos possibly be to call ourselves the Best band?”

The crowd chuckled amicably.

“Well, that, my friends, is simply an acronym for all of our names! And partially because we are the best!”

The crowd laughed again, much harder than before. Impulse marveled at Bdubs’ natural stage presence; he never realised what a gift Bdubs had for it.

“We have the guitar-wizz himself, Tango Tek, to my left today!” He introduced, gesturing dramatically to Tango, who grinned and waved eagerly.

Jimmy cheered loudly, blowing kisses to Tango, who winked back while blushing hard.

“We’ve got the drumming master himself, Skizz Leman, behind me!” Bdubs spun around, pointing at Skizz with an excited grin. He waved at the crowd, dramatically hitting the cymbals and tossing his hair.

Impulse blushed, endeared, and also embarrassed at Skizz’s boy-band-esque behaviour. Grian nudged him knowingly, wiggling his eyebrows.

“Stop it,” Impulse whispered, blushing impossibly harder due to his behaviour being noticed.

“And to my right on the keyboard, the incredible, talented, handsome Etho Slab!” Bdubs quickly moved over to give a quick peck to Etho’s cheek, drawing a playful eyebrow raise and awkward wave from him.

“If you couldn’t tell, everybody, that’s my awesome boyfriend who you all better cheer for the loudest!” Bdubs laughed.

Impulse and Gem cheered excitedly, waving up at all of them with wide smiles.

“And we can’t forget, yours truly, Benjamin Double-Oh!” He gestured to himself dramatically, blowing kisses into the crowd.

“His name is Benjamin ?!!” Grian stage-whispered, staring at Impulse with a horrified look.

“Yep,” Impulse chucked. “Etho didn’t want to say all that when they were kids, and just started calling him Bdubs.”

“Horrifying.” Gem stared, her world clearly rocked by this new realization.

“And, of course, lurking in the crowd tonight is our amazing tech guy, Impulse SV!” Bdubs hollered, moving forward to point out Impulse.

Impulse reddened instantly, turning around to stare at the crowd with an awkward grin on his face. The sound of Skizz cheering excitedly in the background while Grian pulled him into a side-hug eased his nerves slightly, prompting him to wave to the crowd.

The crowd’s consistent cheering finally lessened, with the majority readjusting to stare up at the stage again.

“Anyway, that’s enough yapping from me!” Bdubs resumed his place at the microphone stand with a beaming grin. “We have a good lineup for you all tonight, lots of classics that you better know the words to,” He waited for the crowd’s laughter to subside before continuing. “To get this party going tonight, we present to you, 1979 by The Smashing Pumpkins!”

Impulse cheered wildly as the song opened with the thrum of Skizz’s drums. He was glad they had chosen to open with this song; it was one of his favourites.

He nodded his head, already feeling the music fill his body with overwhelming calm. Despite having heard this song hundreds of times at practice and in his headphones, it would never stop hitting as hard.

“ Shake down 1979,” Bdubs sang clearly, the audience letting out a small cheer.

Impulse swayed along as Bdubs kept singing, honing his gaze onto Skizz in the background. Skizz was having the time of his life, playing the drums with a huge smile on his face. It was a beautiful sight. And not just because he had the perfect view of Skizz’s flexed muscles.

Before he knew it, the song was over, and the audience was clapping and hooting ecstatically.

“Thank you, thank you!” Bdubs called, blowing kisses into the crowd. “Now this next song is a classic, so I'd better hear some singing along!”

Tango riffed on his guitar, Skizz’s drumming quickly accompanying the sound to make for a smooth, upbeat intro to Friday, I’m In Love .

Gem cheered loudly, gripping onto Grian’s arm and looking around eagerly. As quick as lightning, Pearl appeared at Gem’s side, holding her hand and dancing along with her. Happiness was clear on both their faces as the melody continued while they twirled each other excitedly.

“Gem told me that this is her and Pearl’s favourite song,” Jimmy nudged, looking past Impulse and smiling at the dancing couple.

“They’re so sweet,” Impulse whispered back, grinning fondly.

Impulse let himself dance along, getting twirled playfully by Jimmy while they both laughed. As much as Jimmy was proud of Tango, Impulse knew he wished that Tango were here to dance with him.

And maybe Impulse wished he could dance with Skizz, too.

Jimmy dragged Grian into their dance, to which Grian groaned and tried to pretend like he hated it. But Impulse saw the way he got similarly lost in the music, moving effortlessly with a huge smile on his face.

Impulse let go to watch Jimmy and Grian spin each other round and round several times before stopping, laughing as they croaked out various complaints about being dizzy.

Much to all of their dismay, the song was over, and Bdubs jumped right into introducing the next one, How Far We’ve Come by Matchbox Twenty.

The next twenty minutes passed in a happy blur of both upbeat and slow songs. Here Comes Your Man, Cornerstone, and Last Night on Earth , all accompanied with lots of dancing. Impulse had never considered himself a dancer, but something about being surrounded by his good friends and soothing music brought out a side in him he didn’t know he had.

Impulse listened intently to the beautiful closing notes of Last Night on Earth , making a mental note to listen to that song again when he had a spare minute. Despite Skizz recommending him a plethora of Green Day songs, he wasn’t sure he had come across that one before, and he obviously hadn’t been paying enough attention to it during practice.

And in the most sappy way possible, the profound yearning and devotion in the lyrics of that song reminded him of how he felt about Skizz. Impulse was truly falling for him, the ground dropping out beneath his feet with every subtle gaze they shared.

Impulse tried his best to snap back to attention as the song came to a close, focusing attentively on Bdubs to drown out the screaming love declarations bouncing around in his head.

“Okay, everybody! We’ve come to one of our last songs for the night, and I am delighted to present to you Good Riddance (Time of Your Life) !” Bdubs grinned, his voice slightly hoarser than it had been at the start of the performance.

“Aw, guys, it’s our grad song!” Gem cried, tears pricking at her eyes as she pulled Pearl into her side. She reciprocated, reaching for Grian and starting a hug chain that extended all the way down to Jimmy.

They swayed gently as Bdub’s lilting voice sang out into the audience, invoking a nostalgic emotion Impulse didn’t know he had. In the past few months, he had become much more attached to this school and the people in it, and the prospect of graduating no longer filled him with the glee it once had. It was instead replaced with longing, longing for an experience he wished had been filled with more positivity.

Impulse looked over to see Gem and Pearl crying, holding each other tightly but still smiling. It was likely related to Gem moving back to Canada for college, the news of which had only been announced two weeks ago. 

Impulse wasn’t sure he had the courage they did. To either accept the ending of their relationship, or try and do long distance and pray it worked out.

Regardless, Impulse was sure they would figure it out.

The song ended, the crowd cheering wildly while Bdubs bowed gracefully.

“Thank you, everyone! Tonight has been a blast, and we would love to end it with a song specifically requested by our stud drummer, Skizz!” Bdubs gestured back to Skizz, who grinned excitedly.

“I didn’t know there was another song,” Jimmy remarked, looking at Impulse confusedly.

“Neither, I thought Good Riddance was the last one,” Impulse looked up at the stage, raising an eyebrow at Skizz. He got a wink in return, causing his stomach to twist with butterflies.

Bdubs walked back and passed the microphone stand to Skizz, who stood up and looked out at the crowd with a grin.

“Anybody here a fan of The Cure?” Skizz asked, grinning as the audience cheered enthusiastically, with Impulse cheering the loudest. “Well, our final song for tonight is one of their classics, Just Like Heaven !” He beamed, voice shaking slightly. “I could say who this is devoted to, but I think he already knows.” He added, briefly glancing at Impulse before looking away.

Impulse could have sworn his heart leaped out of his chest, sprinting across the stage and entwining itself with Skizz’s. He simply stared up at Skizz, not bothering to hide the crimson blush creeping up his neck and growing smile across his face.

“What’re you smiling for?” Jimmy asked, nudging him questioningly.

“This is my favourite song,” Impulse breathed, still in disbelief.

“So?” Grian joined in, staring at him expectantly.

“This wasn’t on the setlist originally, but I mentioned to Skizz two weeks ago that this was my favourite song of all time,” He stuttered out, hardly daring to believe Skizz had done this. “I got sick last week, and didn’t go to any practices, and I had no idea they had been practicing this one.”

“Holy shit, dude,” Jimmy stared, a wide grin radiating recognition as an understanding smile came over his face.

“He picked this for you?” Grian stared as well, almost lost for words for the first time in his life.

“I think he did. I hope he did,” Impulse tried to compose himself, but he was still staring up at Skizz, an awestruck look on his face as reality crashed into him.

“Impy, in the nicest way possible, that is not something a friend would do,” Gem said, smiling cheekily at him.

“Yeah, dude,” Pearl agreed with an equally wide smile. “That man loves you, loud and clear.”

“Yeah,” Impulse whispered, his heart beating in time with the rhythmic tune he knew off by heart. 

Bdubs sang the opening lyrics with his effortless melodic voice, almost rivalling the real singer of the song. Impulse found it in himself to dance a little, acutely aware of the excited whispers and happy glances his friends were giving him.

Bdubs finished the verse, holding the note powerfully before turning towards Skizz and shouting into the microphone, “Hit it, Skizz!”

“ Spinning on that dizzy edge , I kissed her face and kissed her head, ” Skizz sang, slightly off-key and voice shaking, but ultimately going straight to Impulse’s heart.

“I didn’t know he could sing,” Jimmy murmured, smiling down at him.

“Neither,” Impulse stared up at Skizz in awe as he continued.

Skizz was looking around anxiously, but his gaze fell onto Impulse, blue eyes locked with brown as he continued to sing. “Why are you so far away? She said, ‘Why won’t you ever know—”

Impulse’s breath hitched as his stare remained locked on Skizz, knowing what lyrics came next.

“ —That I’m in love with you. ”

“No way!” Grian gasped.

“ That I’m in love with you.” A horrifyingly enchanting smile overcame Skizz’s face, his eyebrows scrunched with glee as he continued to stare at Impulse, only at Impulse.

“ You, ” Skizz kept singing, his smile giving way to a look of utter love and devotion.

“ Soft and only! ” Bdubs cut back in.

“ You, ” Skizz continued.

“ Lost and lonely!”

“You!”

“Strange as angels, dancing in the deepest oceans, twisting in the water.”

“You’re just like a dream!” Skizz interjected, staring so intently and lovingly at Impulse that he felt the scattered pieces of his heart collapse into place under the weight of their shared gaze.

“Impulse, are you serious, brother!” Jimmy grabbed him, shaking hard.

“Can you even pretend to ignore this?!” Gem stared at him, a happy, knowing grin coming over her face.

“I don’t think he can, Gem,” Pearl added with a wink.

“Do you see what this man is doing for you right now?!” Grian almost yelled, turning towards him and staring with a combination of shock, cognizance, and awe.

“I do,” Impulse whispered, hardly able to speak. “I finally do.”

Chapter Text

“Thank you, thank you, everybody!” Bdubs called amongst the enthusiastic clapping and cheering. “The next act should be on in about half an hour, so take a break, go enjoy some of the lovely attractions and food stalls! But for now, this is the Best band, and we hope to see you again in the future!”

The applause amplified as encouraging shouts and wolf whistles filled the air. Impulse joined in, clapping and cheering, but continuing to stare at Skizz with utter shock. All he wanted to do was sprint onto the stage and fling himself into Skizz’s arms. He couldn’t believe his dreams had finally become reality. Impulse could feel his heart singing, and the reply no longer seemed so distant.

The Best band bowed, all of them grinning like they had just performed to hundreds of thousands of people. Although it probably seemed that way to them. Impulse breathed a sigh of relief as the cheering tapered off, his ears filled with the much quieter volume of Grian babbling nonsense.

“Are you even listening, Impulse?” Grian raised an eyebrow as Impulse slowly turned towards him.

“No…” he murmured sheepishly, tugging at his horn.

“Good, good, good,” Grian chuckled. “Means you missed my whole rant about how you should kiss Skizz silly tonight.”

“You suck!” Impulse shoved Grian away with a groan. Evil cackling filled his ears.

“Look, dude!” Jimmy yelled excitedly. “I think we can go up there now!”

Impulse spun around to see that the crowd had dispersed, and the band was milling about on stage, picking up their stuff and moving it off the stage. “Come on, Jimmy!” Impulse grinned, running around the side of the stage and scrambling on top of it.

Standing upright, he turned to his left to see that Jimmy was already next to him, sprinting across the stage, and flinging his arms around Tango gleefully. Impulse watched with a smile as Jimmy pressed kisses all over Tango’s face before tipping his head upwards and kissing him properly.

Impulse looked around, eyes landing on Skizz hunched over his drums. As if he knew, Skizz turned around and stared at him, eyes instantly lighting up.

As though a machine propelled him, Impulse ran across the stage and straight into Skizz’s arms. He was cradled instantly, Skizz’s heart pounding against Impulse’s chin as they both melted into the touch. Impulse wound his tail around Skizz’s ankle before leaning back and smiling brightly. “Nice performance, dude!”

“Thanks, man,” Skizz grinned back. “Did you like the surprise song?” He winked, but his grin faltered slightly, as though he was nervous.

“Of course!” Impulse trembled slightly, unsure how to go about saying what he truly thought. “It was nice of you to sing that for me.”

“Don’t worry, homie! It’s the least I could do,” Skizz beamed, his wings twitching. “I knew you would like the surprise!”

Impulse felt his breath still, staring at Skizz confusedly. “So there was no other reason? You just felt like surprising me with my favourite song?” That is quite possibly the most romantic song I know? He added mentally.

“No- Why would-” Skizz took a deep breath, shoving his hands in his pockets. “I just wanted to do something nice for you, Impy Dimpy Dop.”

Impulse looked at him closely, taking in the flush creeping up his neck, his flared, twitching wings, his dilated pupils, and his gaze locked in place. Tentatively moving forward, Impulse wrapped his arms around Skizz’s waist, leaning back into Skizz’s chest. A heartbeat thrummed, fast and thunderous, and trembling hands found their way to Impulse’s shoulders.

Without uttering a word or so much as a breath, Skizz had given himself away. He was lying , and Impulse knew it. At least, he thought so. He just wasn’t sure how to bring it up. That would be a later problem. “Thanks, buddy,” Impulse whispered into his chest.

“No problem,” Skizz murmured shakily.

“Hey! Lovebirds!” Tango yelled.

Impulse backed up and turned around, met with a giggling Jimmy and amused Tango. “Time to head off! Martyn said he just got home!” Tango called with a smug smile.

“Sounds good,” Skizz chirped, turning away and slinging the duffel bag over his shoulder. 

Impulse reached for the suitcase, but it was quickly snatched from his grasp by Skizz, who smiled down at him. “Let’s go, buddy,” he said.

Impulse smiled shakily, turning around and following after Tango.

…

Bdubs raised his hand to knock on the door, smiling eagerly at all of them. Impulse inhaled sharply, praying to whoever was listening that this time would be more fun. An arm around his shoulder pulled him closer, and he didn’t bother looking up to see who it was. He already knew. He was just wondering why Skizz had deflected the topic so quickly. Was he scared? Unsure? Impulse didn’t want to think about it too hard. He was already feeling embarrassed for assuming he would have that much luck.

Music reverberated through the walls of the house, accompanying the sound of loud chatter and hysterical laughter. Impulse could hear a familiar voice just inside the door, but it was too muffled for him to figure out who was talking. Footsteps sounded lightly on the other side of the door before it flung open, revealing a very frazzled Martyn.

“Aye-up,” Martyn huffed, bending over and pressing his hands to his knees.

“You alright there, baby?” Bdubs questioned, dipping his head to check on Martyn.

“Fine, fine, ” Martyn groaned. “Just making sure no one’s destroying my house. Takes a lot of work, apparently.”

“Tell me about it, dude,” Skizz laughed, clapping Martyn on the back.

“Anyway!” Martyn righted himself, looking at all of them with an excited grin. “Happy to have you! Come on in!” He gestured to the hallway.

Etho walked in tentatively, nodding politely to Martyn. Impulse followed suit, making his way through the hallway until he arrived in the main area. Masses of people crowded his vision, all talking about seemingly exciting topics while throwing back drink after drink. A couple was tucked into a corner, kissing passionately as one of them was pressed against the wall. Gross. Music blared through the space, bass thrumming in Impulse’s ears as he looked at some stragglers dancing erotically to the House music. Based on the crowd, Impulse assumed that most of these people hadn’t even gone to the festival. The things teenagers would do for a party would never fail to astound him.

Etho had already melted into the crowd, and Impulse felt his heart rate pick up as he realised he was alone. Breathing deeply, he scanned the room for any vaguely familiar faces. He breathed a huge sigh of relief as his gaze landed on Grian and Scar, who were curled up next to each other on the couch. “How’d you guys get here so fast?!” Impulse exclaimed, smiling widely as he walked over and sat down next to them.

“I left early to avoid the crowd rush.” Scar smiled, stretching his arms outwards.

“Then I met Scar at my car right after you went to snog Skizz.” Grian snickered, grinning cheekily. 

“Oh my Void!” Impulse groaned, rolling his eyes with equal fondness and frustration. Only Grian could infuriate him to no end like this. Impulse supposed it was the price of admission for being friends with the most honest person he’d ever met.

“Whatcha guys talkin’ about?” Skizz seemingly appeared out of nowhere, sliding in next to Impulse with a smile.

“Nothing!” Impulse and Grian chorused, sharing a startled look before resetting their faces to normal.

“What’d I miss?!” Skizz questioned emphatically, slinging an arm around Impulse and staring at them expectantly.

“Nothing, really,” Impulse said far too quickly. “Grian was just being a dick, nothing new.”

“Ah, yeah, that checks out.” Skizz chuckled, running his thumb along Impulse’s shoulder.

“Hey!” Grian pouted, widening his eyes and cradling his wings around himself.

“It’s true!” Skizz remarked, eyes gleaming with mischief.

“Is not!”

“Is too!”

“You suck!”

“You suck more!”

“I suck more what, Skizz? What do I suck more of?” Grian grinned devilishly.

Skizz laughed hard, doubling over and wiping tears from his eyes. “I’m gonna leave it,” he choked out, his wings shaking from the effort.

“What in the world is going on here?” A familiar voice asked with a giggle in his voice. Impulse whipped his head upwards to see Jimmy hand in hand with Tango, smiling down at all of them. Looking past them, he saw Gem and Pearl walking into the room, chattering excitedly about something.

“I lost track of the conversation a while ago, Jimmy, don’t you worry,” Scar laughed.

“Sounds good,” Jimmy replied, plonking himself on the floor and dragging Tango down with him, leading to a surprised squawk.

“What doing, everyone?!” Gem pulled Pearl over, both of them sitting down next to Jimmy on the floor. 

“Just hanging out,” Grian replied, letting out a yawn and leaning into Scar’s side. “I’m sleepy if I’m being honest.”

“Aren’t we all.” Tango yawned in solidarity, lying down with his head in Jimmy’s lap.

“Time to get drinking then!” Pearl chirped excitedly. “It’s too early for y’all to be acting like this.”

“Agreed!” Gem winked at Pearl, getting to her feet and holding out her hand to Pearl. “Anyone else coming?”

Impulse sat with his thoughts for a moment, contemplating whether to go with them. He had never drunk alcohol before, and he wasn’t sure how his body was going to react to it. He’d seen the outcome of ridiculously drunk people at Skizz’s party, and he wasn’t a fan. Alcohol turned people into unbelievable jerks.

However, Impulse’s ego was slightly bruised from how quickly he had jumped to conclusions about Skizz. He still couldn’t believe that Skizz was refusing to admit anything. But was there anything to admit? Had Impulse managed to gaslight himself into believing Skizz actually liked him back? 

Maybe he did need a drink. A couple of cups of punch couldn’t hurt, right?

To his dismay, Gem and Pearl had already scampered off to the kitchen. Scrambling off the couch and muttering something about changing his mind, Impulse weaved his way through the crowd in a desperate attempt to find the kitchen. Bodies surrounded him, heat building in his body as he became more overwhelmed by the minute. The blinding light of the kitchen was a miraculous sight, and he saw Gem and Pearl bent over the punch bowl and eyeing it suspiciously.

“Heyo!” He called, smiling bashfully as they turned around and squealed with glee.

“I didn’t know you drank, Impy!?” Gem wrapped an arm around his side, smiling brightly.

“I don’t usually.” He tugged on his horn awkwardly, trying to calm his lashing tail. “Thought I may as well try.”

“To be honest, I don’t know if you want to drink this stuff, Impulse.” Pearl shot him a concerned look before continuing to eye the punch. “There’s something weird floating in it.”

“Don’t care.” Impulse said determinedly. “I need to get my mind off some things.”

“Your talk with Skizz didn't go well?” Pearl questioned, raising an eyebrow.

“He just—” Impulse sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. “He didn’t even acknowledge a thing! He just claimed that he sang it because it was my favourite song, and not because he actually feels something for me?! It’s making me feel like I’m going crazy!” Impulse looked between them frantically. “I’m not going crazy, right?”

“Don’t crash out on us, buddy.” Gem tilted her head, smiling sympathetically. “I didn’t take Skizz for being one of those emotionally-stunted men, but maybe he is.”

“Hey! Don’t talk bad about our Skizzley!” Pearl exclaimed, hand over her heart. “He’s only a little emotionally stunted, don’t dramatise it.”

“I just don’t get it!” Impulse groaned, slumping against the counter. “In all the time I’ve known him, he’s always worn his heart on his sleeve, so what could be stopping him now other than genuinely just not liking me that way?”

“It’ll be fine, Impy!” Gem squeezed his arm. “My crush radar is never off; he loves you! For sure!”

“Exactly! Unless every single one of us in the crowd is collectively insane, Skizz likes you back, dude!” Pearl crossed her arms and grinned down at him.

“Mmm, it’s possible that we’re all insane,” Gem remarked with a grin.

Impulse’s eyes widened, but before he could stutter out a reply, Pearl was at Gem’s side and placing a hand over her mouth, much to Gem’s indignation.

“She’s lying! Everything’s fine! He likes you, I promise,” Pearl said quickly before her hand was slapped away.

“Whatever.” Impulse sighed. “Point being, I wanna get drunk but I don’t wanna do it alone,” he pleaded, pouting to garner extra sympathy. 

“Impulse, I am not drinking that.” Gem gestured to the questionable punch bowl.

“I’ll tell Skizz I like him tonight if you do,” Impulse lied.

“You got a deal!” Pearl reached for three cups, filling them with the drink and handing them out. “Here’s to Impulse and Skizz!” Pearl winked cheekily before downing her cup.

“Cheers!” Impulse poured the liquid down his throat in one fell swoop, coughing as it hit him in the chest and throat simultaneously. The alcohol lightly singed his throat as he felt the liquid travel down his esophagus before settling in his stomach. While the taste wasn’t that great, he found it wasn’t unbearable. “Not bad,” He sputtered, clearing his throat.

“Yeah!” Gem added, tipping the dregs down her throat. “If it’s drugged, I can't tell.”

“I’ve had worse,” Pearl said, tossing her cup onto the counter.

“What, like on New Year’s?” Gem laughed cheekily.

“Shut it!” Pearl swatted at Gem before pulling her into a hug. 

Impulse rolled his eyes, dipping his cup back into the punch bowl and filling it to the brim. He took a sip, delighting in the way the alcohol tingled on his tongue. He was starting to understand why people liked it so much. “Let’s go!” He sang, turning around and walking back to the main room. He ignored the giggles behind him, only focused on returning to where all the fun was happening.

Sliding through the growing mass of people, Impulse was purely focused on flopping back onto the couch. He managed to make it over with no accidents, slumping onto the couch and leaning on Skizz’s shoulder with a happy sigh.

“How ya doing, bud?” Skizz said softly, leaning his head on Impulse’s.

“Dude!” Impulse moved his head upwards, smiling brightly. “I had no idea how good alcohol is! This is great!”

Skizz giggled, pulling Impulse back in and tucking his wing around Impulse. He leaned into the touch, relishing in Skizz’s perpetually warm body. Impulse felt his heart beat harder as Skizz raised his hand to play with the ends of Impulse’s hair. How was Impulse meant to suppress his feelings when he was treated like this? Worse, how was Skizz able to do it with such calculated ease? Did he really not like Impulse like that?

“Shots anyone?” Ren appeared, precariously balancing a tray and smiling hopefully.

“ Please !” Impulse lunged for one, pouring it down his throat in the same instant. The burning sensation hit the back of his throat immediately, and a searing track burned into his throat. Impulse sputtered, coughing hard as spots appeared in his vision. Maybe the punch wasn’t so bad, but this was outright disgusting.

“Whoa, take it easy there, skippy,” Tango chuckled.

“Yeah, man, slow down.” Skizz rubbed circles into Impulse’s back soothingly. “Thanks, Ren-Diggity!” Skizz nodded to Ren, who smiled awkwardly and walked away.

Impulse cleared his throat, trying to ignore how the vodka? Gin? Instantly rushed to his head. “I’m gooooood, man,” he said, fully aware that he was not being convincing.

Gem giggled, eyes shining as she leaned over to whisper something to Pearl. She giggled in response, shooting Impulse a wink. 

This was the kinda thing would have sent Impulse into a spiral a few months ago, but whether it was due to the alcohol or something else, he found he didn’t care. Besides, he could guess what they’re talking about anyway.

“Are you sure you’re good, hoMIE budDY?” Scar’s voice reached ten octaves higher on the ‘homie buddy,’ causing everyone to turn their heads slowly to look at him. Scar stared wide-eyed. “What? Doesn’t it sound like when Skizzy says it?”

“No, Scar.” Grian deadpanned. “It really, really doesn’t.”

“Oh.”

Impulse burst into a fit of laughter, clutching his sides. Skizz followed suit, shaking against Impulse’s body. Impulse almost felt bad for laughing until Scar dissolved into giggles too, burying his head in his hands. A chain reaction started, with Jimmy choking out a laugh, and Tango quickly following until all of them were cackling helplessly on the floor. Impulse was sure that they were garnering plenty of attention, but he was laughing too hard to care.

Grian inhaled sharply, letting out a final, breathy chuckle before speaking. “By the way, performance was great, guys.”

“A Grian compliment?!” Tango gawked dramatically. “Who would’ve thought!”

“I’m trying to be nice!” Grian groaned, reaching out to smack Tango on the shoulder, but missing. “It was really, really good!”

“Thanks, G!” Skizz grinned, squeezing Grian’s shoulder. “You’re such a sweet guy!”

“Ew,” Grian spat. “Maybe I need to go back to making fun of you.”

“Nooooo, leave him alone!” Impulse whined, making himself cringe, but deciding to commit anyway. “He’s my special guy!” He pressed a hesitant kiss to Skizz’s cheek before quickly turning away.

“Barf.” Gem made a gagging motion. 

“Yeah, that was gross, brother,” Jimmy laughed.

“Seriously, Impulse, the alcohol cannot have gone through you this quickly.” Pearl raised an eyebrow and crossed her arms.

“Yeah! Just look at what you’ve done to Skizz!” Tango gestured wildly, trying to suppress a giggle.

Impulse looked up to see that Skizz was bright red, wings flared, and staring at him with an utterly lovestruck gaze. His halo glowed a faint gold above his head, the dim light growing brighter by the second and penetrating Impulse’s vision. He felt his stomach stir with butterflies as the alcohol fueled him to reach up and pinch Skizz’s cheek affectionately. “No regrets,” he remarked with a grin before lying down with his head in Skizz’s lap.

“You guys have no shame.” Grian rolled his eyes.

“Yeah, Impulse is full-on PDA-ing with no care, and Skizz is a flustered mess!” Tango snickered. “What kinda roleswap is this?”

“Shut up!” Skizz croaked out, shaking his head frenetically as though that would clear the blush on his face.

Impulse couldn’t bear it any longer. His brain may be turning to mush from alcohol, but he was getting tired of all these mixed signals. Tumbling to his feet, he tipped the rest of the punch down his throat and ambled towards the kitchen. Luckily, most of the people had cleared out—probably to get some air, it was very hot in here—and Impulse made it into the kitchen with ease.

“Are you okay?” Grian asked from behind him, and Impulse whipped his head around. Although with his state of mind, it felt more like he was moving in slow motion.

“I’m fineee,” Impulse drawled, dipping his cup into the punch and chugging it quickly. He went to grab more, but Grian grabbed his wrist and eased the cup from his hands.

“No, you’re not.” Grian moved to the sink, grabbed a fresh glass, and filled it with water before putting it in front of Impulse. “Drink it. And tell me what’s going on while you’re at it.”

Impulse reluctantly drank the water, feeling relieved as it traveled down his throat with cooling, comforting ease. He had to admit that it did feel better than the alcohol. “Skizz doesn’t like me,” he said sadly.

“What are you talking about!?” Grian exclaimed, moving closer and nudging his shoulder with Impulse’s. “You just made that man blush so impossibly hard that he was actually lost for words.”

“B-but he didn’t even sing that song because he loved me,” Impulse blubbered, dejection giving way to frustration. “He did it because he wanted to be a good friend ,” he spat, trying to blink away the angry tears that threatened to appear.

“He’s lying, dude.” Grian squeezed his shoulder comfortingly. “You heard what he told Ren, you were there when he locked eyes with you during that song, you were just there when your flirting made him turn bright red! How could you say he doesn’t like you when the signs are all there?” Grian stared at him expectantly.

Impulse tried to summon any common sense, anything that could affirm what Grian said. But all he could focus on was Skizz’s overt dismissal of any love declaration. “I asked him about it, G,” Impulse murmured. “He said he just wanted to do something nice for me, he said . Why would he lie?”

“'Cause he’s scared.” A new voice appeared at the entrance to the kitchen.

Impulse turned to see Tango leaning against the door, staring at him with a determined gaze. “What do you mean?” Impulse whispered.

“He likes you, Impulse. No, he loves you,” Tango said directly, crossing his arms and walking over. “He’s been raving about how to tell you for almost two months, since you guys had that sleepover in January.” Tango let out a half-hearted chuckle. “Void, I never thought Skizz of all people would get this anxious about having a crush, but he is. And I know it’s just because he’s scared of fucking it up.”

“ See , I was right,” Grian smirked triumphantly.

“But I don’t get it,” Impulse sighed, confusion overwhelming him. “He’s the most open guy ever. Why didn’t he just say anything? I know he can tell I like him, too.”

“I really don’t know. But I do know this.” Tango leaned closer, staring intently. “He would kill me if I told you this, but it’s the most concrete proof I’ve got.” Tango took a deep breath. “Y’know his halo and its erratic appearances?”

Impulse nodded slowly.

“He told me it only appears when he’s really happy. Like, overwhelmingly happy. And I’m pretty sure I’ve only ever seen it appear when he talks to you , Impulse.”

Impulse felt clarity crash into him with a world-shattering, eye-opening force. He saw all the times Skizz’s halo had appeared: after they had reconciled their friendship, right before he had gone to sleep in Skizz’s bed, when he had woken up the next morning still in Skizz’s bed, and when he had accidentally flirted with Skizz in one of their calculus classes. It all came back to him, and Impulse got the confirmation he finally needed.

Skizz liked him. No ifs, no buts. Not even his weird mixed signals could distract Impulse now. Skizz liked him. And Impulse liked him too. No, he loved Skizz.

“Shit,” Impulse whispered.

“Yeah,” Grian whispered too, his shock-wrought expression dissolving into a grin. “So, what are you gonna do?”

“Talk to him later, I guess.” Impulse leaned back until his head was facing the ceiling. The blank, white surface brought him some much-needed calm, and he took a deep breath. “For now, we’re gonna go back in there, and act normal . I’m not having this conversation with him in front of all of you idiots.”

“Fine,” Tango grumbled, rolling his eyes fondly. “Let’s go, then.”

Impulse slowly walked out of the room, the once overpowering chatter and music now reduced to a dull static in his ears. Moving sluggishly, he thought about what to do. The news had sobered him up faster than he ever thought possible, and now he could make actual choices. And he was going to act like nothing had happened. There was no point in letting on that he knew, potentially making Skizz even flightier than he had already been recently. Impulse just had to hope his facial expressions wouldn’t give him away. Maybe he could continue acting drunk to keep up the facade?

Before he knew it, everyone was in front of him and staring up with a mix of concern, amusement, and confusion. Impulse glanced at Skizz, who was wide-eyed and red-faced, but was giving him a tentative smile. Impulse smiled back and sat down. “What were you guys talking about?” He asked, trying to stop his voice from shaking.

“College,” Jimmy sighed, leaning against Tango’s shoulder as Tango sat down.

“Gross.” Impulse laughed, waving his hands around to play off his ‘drunk’ demeanor.

“Yeah, what are your guys’ plans?” Pearl asked, smiling sadly. “We all know that Gem is freaking moving back to Canada—”

“—I’m sooooooorey!”

“Whatever.” Pearl groaned, but continued to smile and lean closer to Gem. “I’m taking a gap year, Scar and Skizz are going to the community college here, and Jimmy’s going to the college in the city for his sports scholarship.” Pearl grinned, obviously proud of all of them. “So, what’s your guys’ plan?”

“Engineering school in the city.” Tango grinned, his tail lashing excitedly. “Got a small scholarship there, and it’s one of the top engineering schools in the country. And Jim and I will hopefully get a flat!” Tango leaned over to kiss Jimmy’s cheek. Jimmy blushed, and Grian groaned loudly.

“Can’t believe I’m gonna have to cope with you two in the same city as me,” Grian sighed. “Anyway, I’m going to the city as well, but for marine biology. Mumbo might come too, but he’s deciding between their software development programme and MIT. Nerd got full-ride scholarships to both.”

“This guy! What a stud!” Skizz cheered, even though Mumbo was nowhere to be found.

“Yeah, everyone’s leaving me behind.” Scar pouted, crossing his arms sullenly.

“Aw, we’re sorry, buddy,” Gem reached out to squeeze his arm.

“It’s fine.” Scar waved her off, his brief sulk vanishing in place of an accepting smile. “The doctor said I’ll probably have to have surgery in eighteen months, so my family is thinking of moving up to the city anyway. I’ll just do some courses until then.”

“That sucks, dude. But at least you’re making the best of it.” Jimmy smiled before turning to Impulse. “Anyway, what are you doing, Impulse?”

“Staying here, going to community college.” Impulse grinned. “Not sure what I’m  doing yet, but I know I’m not ready to leave my parents.”

“Fair enough. I’m sure you’re not ready to leave Skizz yet, either.” Pearl grinned cheekily.

Impulse felt himself blush, but tried to suppress it in favor of smiling up at Skizz. He was similarly flushed and obviously trying to feign normalcy. But Impulse could see it. Impulse also chose to ignore it. “Sure,” he said quietly, leaning into Skizz’s shoulder. He wasn’t lying about that.

The conversation spiraled after that, with Impulse barely able to keep up with the incessant bickering and endless laughter. He just sat quietly, Skizz’s body warm against him, while he thought about what to do when the party ended and Skizz was walking him home. That was a problem for later.

…

Later had arrived. Martyn had begun kicking everyone out, and Gem, Pearl, Grian, and Scar had left about an hour ago. Tango and Jimmy were on their way out, which meant that Impulse and Skizz had to be too.

Getting to his feet, Impulse inhaled sharply, trying to calm his nerves. It was time. Everything would be fine. He wasn’t so anxious that he was about to throw up. Not at all. Turning around with a faltering smile, Impulse stuck out his hand. “Time to go?”

“Yeah, better let Martyn clean up and stuff.” Skizz smiled awkwardly, taking Impulse’s hand and standing up. “You feeling better now? The alcohol has had a couple of hours to wear off now.”

“Yeah, I’m good.” Impulse stood stock-still, trying to ignore the gut-wrenching feeling that was barely offset by the feeling of Skizz’s hand in his. This small talk was really doing a number on him. Clutching Skizz’s hand tightly, Impulse pulled him towards the door. He scanned around quickly for Martyn or Ren, but both of them were nowhere to be found.

Pulling the door open, Impulse walked outside, the crisp night breeze assaulting him instantly and making his body feel like it was solidifying into a block of ice. A harsh reminder of why he hated being out past ten pm. 

Skizz was at his side in an instant, tucking his wing around Impulse and pulling him close. The warmth of Skizz’s body was an instant relief, and despite being extremely confused, Impulse melted into the touch. “Thanks,” he whispered, smiling up at Skizz.

“No problem, Impy Dimpy Dop.” Skizz grinned back, an adorable dimple embedding itself in his cheek.

“You’re such a weirdo, how is it you’ve managed to call me that mouthful for two months straight?” Impulse teased, nudging Skizz’s side.

“What're you talking about? It’s your name, dude!” Skizz laughed, pulling Impulse closer.

“Dumbass,” Impulse sighed fondly, flicking his tail against Skizz’s ankle. How was it that someone could simultaneously frustrate and confuse him to no end while also being the safest, most grounding force Impulse had ever had? How was he meant to tell Skizz he loved him when Skizz seemed adamantly against being open about his feeling? 

Impulse still felt like he was floating, but he was unsure whether it was from the alcohol or the chance that the only person he had ever truly loved, loved him too. Tucking himself further into Skizz and laying his head in the crook of his neck, he tried to pretend it was just the alcohol. “How are you feeling, now that your first performance is done?” Impulse asked, trying to distract himself from the gnawing pit in his stomach.

“Good, dude! I think it went pretty well!” Skizz rambled, waving his hands around. He was adorable when he was talking about his passions. “Kinda messed up during Just Like Heaven , but I don’t think anyone noticed.”

“Why would that be, huh?” Impulse blurted out before he could stop himself. He felt his brain turn to mush, hoping, praying , that his accidental assertiveness would coax Skizz into finally saying what Impulse had been waiting for.

Skizz froze, mouth open senselessly as he averted Impulse’s gaze. “I don’t know,” he croaked out. “Just one of those days, I guess. I was always gonna make a mistake. Just wish it wasn’t during that song.” Skizz smiled down at Impulse, almost knowingly.

Impulse had never been this frustrated in his entire life. What would it take for Skizz to just tell him? Did Impulse have to outright confess? Because Void , he was on the verge of doing that. “Right,” Impulse murmured, continuing to walk along.

Silence fell between them, and Impulse zoned out, allowing the anxiety to consume him as his house grew closer and closer. Turning onto his street, he knew it was now or never. And he had about two minutes to ease them both into possibly the scariest conversation of his entire life. “I still can’t believe you played my favourite song, Skizz. That was sweet of you.” Impulse breathed shakily, curling his tail around his ankle.

“It was nothing, man!” Skizz smiled forcefully. “Don’t sweat it!”

They were five doors down from Impulse’s house. He was out of time. And he wasn’t sure he would survive the not-knowing until school started up again in a week. “It was something, though. Wasn’t it?” He breathed slowly.

Skizz froze, wings shuddering against Impulse’s back. “What are you talking about?”

“I was right, earlier, about there being another reason.” Impulse felt his hands shaking. “You didn’t tell me then, but you can tell me now. So, what was it?” He walked slowly, now in front of his house.

Skizz was breathing so hard, Impulse could practically hear his heart racing. Skizz looked at him with confusion that Impulse could see was a facade. “Impulse, what are you saying?” Impulse felt his blood begin to boil. “I’m not sure I understand what you—”

“Oh, for fucks sake, Skizz!” Impulse had snapped. His frustration had spilled over, and his mouth was a runaway train disconnected from the tracks that led to his brain. “Cut the crap! I talked to Tango earlier, and I know why you sang that song for me! I know why you’ve been so flustered around me, I know why your halo only glows when you’re around me, but I sure as hell don’t know why you won’t admit it!”

“Impulse, I was just—”

“You were just what? You’re literally the most open, honest, unreserved person I have ever met, and I would love to know what’s been holding you back from admitting it!”

Skizz was blushing hard as Impulse whirled around, uncharacteristically restrained blue eyes meeting Impulse’s raging brown. Skizz’s slightly parted lips and messy black hair were so devastatingly alluring, Impulse could hardly stop himself from launching forward and closing the distance between them. Maybe it was fortunate that Impulse was too exasperated to actually do it. “Skizz…” he grabbed Skizz’s hand, trying to calm himself down. “Why haven’t you said anything?”

Skizz sucked in a breath, squeezing Impulse’s hand tightly. “I was just scared that you didn’t feel the same.”

“But how could you think that?!” Impulse exclaimed, staring at Skizz intently. “I don’t think I’ve been the most subtle about how you make me feel, how I feel about you.”

“I don’t know, man.” Skizz’s wings were twitching violently. “I just didn’t want to make you uncomfortable? I think?”

“Well, your silence only made it worse, and I’m done with that. So let me spell it out for you,” Impulse inhaled sharply, still not believing that he was actually about to do this. “After Caleb died, I didn’t feel safe around anyone. My parents walked on eggshells around me from guilt, my classmates treated me like I would crack at any moment, and I genuinely didn’t see any way around it other than retreating into myself. I was so alone, Skizz. Until you came along.”

“When you talked to me after that first calc class, I was confused. I hadn’t met anyone who had treated me like a normal person for nearly four years. But you—” Impulse’s lip quivered, and he gripped Skizz’s hand even harder. “—you didn’t think that about me. You were able to see past my trauma, and yeah, it was because you had no idea who I was, but you saw me for who I was, and not what happened to me. Skizz, I—”

“—Impulse, this conversation doesn’t have to happen if you’re not ready—”

“—No, it does. It’s been eating me alive.” Impulse said firmly, more determined than ever. “Skizz, I love you. You’re the only person I’ve ever felt comfortable around, ever felt safe around. You brought me out of my shell at a time when I needed it most, and I will spend the rest of my life trying to pay you back for that. But I also know that you don’t need that. You did it because you wanted to, and that’s what I admire the most about you. Your unwavering kindness, your stupid nicknames, the way you make me laugh harder than anyone ever has, they all make you who you are.”

Impulse breathed hard, the effort of baring his soul for Skizz to see with no reservations, sending a wave of fatigue washing over him. But he was so close to being free. “I love you. Not just for the way you make me feel, or for what you’ve done for me, but for who you are, and all the little things you do each day that remind me how lucky I am to call you one of my closest friends. But as much as I love you platonically, I love you romantically too. And I really, really hope that you actually feel the same, otherwise this is gonna be awkward at school next week.” Impulse choked out a laugh, staring up at Skizz.

Skizz had the most lovestruck, adoring look on his face that made the butterflies in Impulse’s stomach flutter more violently than ever before. Gazing up at Skizz, Impulse noticed the moment that their eyes locked, and the instantaneous change in Skizz’s expression. Within the same instance, Skizz had dipped his head down and closed the distance.

Lips were on Impulse’s, soft, soothing, everything he had ever hoped for. Skizz was kissing him. Impulse felt himself float away along with the butterflies that had finally made their exit. The air was permeated with comfort, relief, and love . Skizz’s hand grazed his jaw, and Impulse shivered. It was only then that he realised he had completely frozen, and wasn’t even kissing Skizz back.

Skizz pulled back, staring down in shock, and Impulse gently touched his finger to his own lips. Whoops. Guess he was so lovestruck that he forgot kissing someone back was important. “Sorry, I—”

“No, Impulse, I’m sorry.” Skizz breathed hard, regret filling his eyes. “I’ve made you uncomfortable. You said all that, and I just… I couldn’t help myself.” Skizz backed up, hands on the back of his head as he spun in a circle, frustrated. “I shouldn’t have done that. You said I’m the person who makes you the most comfortable you’ve ever been, and I’ve just thrown that out the window.”

Impulse was instantly shocked, unsure what had brought this on. Did not kissing someone back really imply that? He was just surprised. “Skizz, really, it’s fine—”

“No, no, you don’t have to do that. Just—” Skizz quickly dropped his hands to his sides, wings drooping. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

“Of course I am, Skizz.” Impulse smiled sadly. “I’ve been waiting for that for a long time now.”

“Yeah, but I still shouldn’t have done that. It was too much, too fast.” Tears filled Skizz’s eyes, which he tried to subtly wipe away. “Look, I need time to think. I’ve fucked this up a bit, and I just want to give you space. Is that okay?”

Impulse stared wide-eyed, trying to suppress the tears that threatened to surface. Had he done something wrong? “I mean, if that’s what you want…”

“Good, okay,” Skizz said shakily, shoving his hands into his pockets. “I’m sorry, and I’ll message you soon.”

Impulse felt his eyes fill with tears, unsure how Skizz’s certainty had crumpled so quickly. He found he was too defeated to fight the tears now. “Okay,” he breathed, not bothering to hide the tears rolling down his face. “Goodnight.”

“Night, Impulse.” Skizz sniffled, turning around and walking away.

Walking to his door and ducking inside as quickly as possible, Impulse crumbled once he closed the door. He hadn’t found the kiss uncomfortable in the slightest. He thought he and Skizz were finally on the same page. What was bothering Skizz now? Had Impulse given off the wrong vibe by not kissing him back? Why was Skizz feeling so guilty? How were they back where they had just started? What did this mean for their friendship? Was it ruined?

The thoughts were too overwhelming. It was much too late to be thinking this hard. Impulse was just going to go to sleep, maybe message Zed for some advice in the morning, and hopefully, he and Skizz would sort this out as soon as possible.

But for now, he would just cry and wonder how everything had gone wrong so quickly.

Chapter Text

Skizz’s vision swam with tears as he trudged down the street, his mind disordered so severely that he felt like he was drunk, even though he hadn’t had a drop.

He guessed that this was the result of destroying the most important relationship in his life. Skizz had been given the glorious opportunity to finally, finally, tell Impulse how he felt, to hopefully even call Impulse his boyfriend. But he had squandered that opportunity because he was too excited. Too selfish.

It made Skizz feel sick.

He hardly processed the thirty-minute walk home, too absorbed in loathing every decision he had made tonight. His front door made a sudden appearance in front of him, his brain hardly registering that he was already home. He unlocked the door, entered his house, locked the door, and trudged upstairs in an almost robotic motion. He let his wings drag across the floor, no doubt collecting all the dust he was meant to vacuum up earlier. Curse his stupid procrastination.

Making his way into his room, he flopped forward onto his bed, the typically soft sheets doing nothing to soothe him. 

Skizz couldn’t believe he had messed up so badly. What had possessed him? At no point did Impulse express a desire to kiss him, so why did he do it? Was Skizz’s ability to sense others' feelings disappearing? Was he even himself without that power? Was he no better than—

No.

Skizz knew this obsessiveness wasn’t healthy for him. He couldn’t let himself spin out like this; that was a dangerous path to head down. 

And yet, he couldn’t help it, which meant that he really had to talk to someone else. And unfortunately for him, it couldn’t be Impulse. Skizz’s stupid behaviour had made sure of that. 

Flipping his communicator open and reluctantly thumbing through his recent messages, Skizz thought about who he could talk to. Tango was too black and white about these things, Etho was—to put it affectionately—a bit pathetic about romance, and Pearl was way too nice; she would definitely spare his feelings.

Continuing to scroll despairingly, Skizz had almost given up until he came across Bdubs. 

Bdubs. The only person Skizz had ever fully opened up to about his experience at his old high school. He could kick himself for not thinking of Bdubs sooner. Who better to help him through this than his cousin? It was perfect. Even though Skizz felt a pang of guilt for not having messaged Bdubs in two months.

Inhaling sharply and typing out a message, Skizz prayed to whoever was listening that Bdubs was still awake.

Skizz: Yo, Double-Down, are you awake? Need to talk to you about something

Several minutes passed before a response appeared. Skizz’s tension and anxiety had been steadily increasing, but disappeared almost instantly as he processed Bdubs’ words.

Bdubs: why r u msging me at this time.

Bdubs: its bedtime.

Skizz let out a chuckle, smiling down at his communicator. Trust Bdubs to only focus on his beauty sleep. Although he did have a point. Quickly glancing over at his alarm clock, he winced as he realised it was nearly two am. 

Skizz: Sorry buddy. This is sorta urgent though, if that’s any help

Bdubs: fine, fine, wut is it then

Skizz: I think I wrecked my relationship with Impulse

Bdubs: WHAT

Bdubs: surely not

Skizz: I think I did, dude. He said he was in love with me, and I seriously don’t know what came over me but I kissed him

Bdubs: AW REALLY THATS SO CUTE

Skizz grimaced, thinking back to that moment. It hadn’t felt cute even a little bit. It just felt like Skizz was pushing Impulse’s limits. Again.

Skizz: No, dude. Not cute. Not at all. He didn’t kiss me back, and he seemed so uncomfortable afterwards

Bdubs: mayb he was just nervous

Skizz: No, I know him. I fucked up, Bdubs. I really fucked this up

Bdubs: ok ok look

Bdubs: firstly, im sure u didnt. impulse is so smitten with u its downright disgusting 

Bdubs: but skizz its so late and i feel like u and i would benefit from having this conversation after we get some sleep

Skizz: Yeah, you’re probably right

Bdubs: im always right

Skizz: Oh shut up!

Bdubs: i am tho

Bdubs: anyway why dont i come by at like 1 tmrw and we can chat

Bdubs: yes?

Skizz: Sure, that works

Bdubs: cool

Bdubs: love ya, but now u gotta let me get my 10 hours

Skizz: Love you too, you pampered little princess

Bdubs: u know it!

Letting out a wet chuckle, Skizz rubbed his eyes only to realise that tears were streaming down his face. Yikes. This had dragged up his repressed feelings more than he had realised. Or he was just really upset about hurting Impulse.

It was probably a mix of both. But Skizz didn’t want to admit that his past had affected him more than he thought it had.

He would just go to sleep, and Bdubs would come over, and everything would be completely fine.

Skizz tried to hope so.

…

The animated chatter from downstairs jerked Skizz into consciousness, and he sat up frantically. Whipping his head to the right, he saw that the time read 1:07 pm.

Shit. He really should’ve set an alarm for this.

Bdubs' jolly voice filled the house, presumably talking to Skizz’s mom. 

Leaping out of bed, Skizz quickly ran into the bathroom to comb through his hair and swiftly brush his teeth. Bdubs’ voice started to become clearer, the telltale creak of the stairs telling Skizz that he had about thirty seconds to put a shirt on.

Running back to his room, he threw on the first shirt he saw and sat on his bed, trying to act like he wasn’t just desperately trying to make himself look presentable.

“Skizz?” Bdubs sang, footsteps nearing Skizz’s bedroom.

“I’m in my room, buddy!”

Bdubs peeked his head around the corner, his usual beaming grin on his face. “Hey, baby!” 

“What’s up, buddy?!” Skizz tried to smile, but he could feel the visible tightness in his own features.

Bdubs tapped his foot, leveling Skizz with his eyes. He plonked himself down on the bed next to Skizz, raising an eyebrow expectantly. “What’s going on, Skizz?”

Skizz immediately crumpled, his facade cracking under the weight of Bdubs’ intense gaze. Tears burned against the back of his eyes, and he could feel his wings beginning to twitch uncontrollably. “I messed up, Bdubs,” Skizz breathed shakily.

“Surely it’s not as bad as you think it is?” Bdubs said, trying to be comforting but not quite hitting the mark.

“No, no, it’s pretty bad.” Skizz felt like he was sinking further and further into his bed, hoping he could disappear entirely.

“Tell me what happened, then.” Bdubs’ tone left no room for discussion.

Relenting, Skizz took a deep breath and tried to organise his thoughts. “I was walking Impulse home, and I was trying to think of a good way to tell him the truth—”

“Truth about what?”

Skizz froze, realising he had trapped himself.

Bdubs stared confusedly, brows furrowed, head tilted, and mouth loosely hanging open. “Truth about what, Skizz?”

“I, uh… didn’t tell him that I dedicated that song to him at the festival…” Skizz dropped his head, preparing for Bdubs to relentlessly make fun of him.

Skizz was pleasantly surprised when Bdubs simply let out a frustrated sigh before waving his hand dismissively. “Just— Why don’t you keep going, Skizz?” Bdubs was obviously trying to suppress a rant, for which Skizz was very grateful.

“Okay, okay, okay. Anyway, walking him home, and right before we get to his front door, he absolutely rumbled me for my behaviour and started confessing how much he loved me—” Skizz took a deep breath, trying to subdue the insistent glow of his halo, “—and I guess I just couldn’t help myself?”

A smirk crept onto Bdubs’ face, the obvious beginnings of a grin. However, Bdubs maintained his small, smug smile. “I knew you would get round to it, ya stud!”

Skizz felt his heart swell with hesitant pride at Bdubs’ belief in him. But Bdubs doesn’t know the actual truth. “Yeah, it would be better if that were actually a good thing.”

Shock saturated Bdubs’ features, but was quickly erased and replaced with mild confusion. He cocked his head, which Skizz took as a sign to continue.

“He didn’t kiss me back even a little bit. And yeah, that makes me sound like some greedy jerk, but it’s more like I could tell that he didn’t like it? That I had overstepped in the worst way possible?” Skizz felt the tears pressing insistently at the back of his eyes, demanding release. Skizz continued to suppress them. He wasn’t about to cry over a problem he caused. That wasn’t who he was. 

“Anyway, I apologised profusely and told him we would talk later, but I’ve been asleep for the past eleven hours so…”

Bdubs stared at him warily, as though he was trying to process something. His eyes were narrowed slightly, lips pursed in contemplation.

Skizz waited patiently, anxiety gnawing at him, ripping him from the inside out. He wasn’t sure what he would do if Bdubs thought he was a horrible person. That being a potential outcome made him want to throw up.

Skizz continued to stare intently at Bdubs, capturing the exact moment that realisation dawned and sympathy washed over Bdubs’ expression. “I know what your problem is, Skizz,” Bdubs said tenderly.

“What?”

“You’re not over what happened to you. And I’m not talking about the bullying. I’m talking about what caused it.” Bdubs delivered his words carefully, aware that his honesty would open up old wounds.

And that it did. Skizz was reminded instantly of the lead-up to his breakdown, that fateful party that changed his life forever. He wished he could push it from his mind, but Bdubs’ words were a cruel reminder of that day.

And horribly, he knew Bdubs was right.

“Skizz?”

Skizz snapped back to attention, clawing his way out of a train of thought that threatened to spiral. He looked at Bdubs sadly, no longer suppressing his tears. 

“Oh, Skizz.” Bdubs moved closer, rubbing soothing circles into Skizz’s back.

“I thought I was past it, Bdubs,” Skizz whispered, trying to stop the uncontrollable shaking that was overcoming his body. “But I think… I think I—”

“Take your time, Skizz,” Bdubs murmured.

Skizz took a deep breath, intently focusing on calming his shaky hands, his shaky hands, his twitchy wings. He finally fell still. He looked back at Bdubs, comforted by sympathetic brown eyes looking up at him. “I felt like I had become him. That I was the person who hurt me so, so, badly.”

“But you’re not, Skizz.” Bdubs looked at him, eyes gleaming with tears that Skizz felt like he had caused. “You could never be like him; the fact that you’re so upset about supposedly hurting Impulse is proof enough of that.”

“But it’s just the idea that I could be like that—”

“But you’re not,” Bdubs insisted, face set into a firm gaze. “You could never be like that scum.”

Skizz sighed, rubbing the tears from his eyes. He didn’t believe what Bdubs was saying. But he supposed he should accept it. Bdubs was rarely that firm with him—it had to mean something. “What do I do then, Bdubs? How do I fix this?”

Bdubs furrowed his brows, giving it some thought before speaking. “Well, for starters, does Impulse know that it happened?”

“No,” Skizz said quickly, trying to ignore the sudden compunction within his chest. “He knows about my self-harm and stuff, but I lied to him about the reason why. I just couldn’t stomach talking about it at the time, especially after what he talked about.”

Bdubs looked interested in what Skizz was referring to, but Skizz just shook his head. He was not about to divulge Impulse’s trauma to Bdubs; that wasn’t his choice to make.

“Okay…” Bdubs said, scrunching his brows before he honed his gaze on Skizz with an intimidating, but encouraging force. “I think you should tell him. Not everything, of course, only what you’re comfortable with. But I think it’ll help him understand where you’re coming from and why you backed off so quickly.”

Skizz felt the anxiety flood through his body, like every one of his nerves had been set alight. His wings were unconsciously twitching, a compulsion that Skizz was unable to subdue.

But, despite the raging unease, he still felt a twinge of relief. He hid very little from Impulse, wearing his heart on his sleeve and hoping he was perceived as such. But he couldn’t deny that telling Impulse this last, hidden truth would be unbelievably cathartic.

“You’re right, Double-Down!” Skizz tried to feign cheeriness, a desperate cue to move on from the sombre atmosphere.

“Why, thank you,” Bdubs laughed, thankfully recognising Skizz’s desire to move on. “I’m so handsome.”

Skizz raised an eyebrow playfully, yelping when Bdubs lunged at him. 

Amongst their tussle, Skizz couldn’t help but wonder how this was going to go. Would Impulse be angry about being lied to? Sympathetic for what he went through? Simply frustrated at his inability to communicate?

He knew he was being ridiculous. It was gonna work out for them. Impulse was one of the most understanding people in the world—it was slightly infuriating if he was being honest. Everything would be fine.

—

Impulse didn’t understand why this had happened.

He thought he would after getting a good night's sleep, but he found that his mind was no clearer than it was before.

This whole situation was just so jarring. Impulse would never have fathomed a world in which Skizz was suddenly unable to communicate before last night. But, frustratingly, it had happened, and now Impulse was stuck wondering why. Was it him? Was it Skizz? Was it some secret third thing?

It hurt his head to think about it.

Lying flat on his back and letting the static of the ceiling fill his vision, Impulse felt lips brushing against his, a hand grazing his jaw, the sensation of floating away out of pure happiness. 

As quickly as he felt it, it was gone, replaced by a lonely silence and an aching absence of Skizz.

As great as it had been, Impulse couldn’t help but feel like it was a waste of his first kiss. He had always dreamed of it being otherworldly, a groundbreaking experience that would change the trajectory of his life. And honestly, it came pretty close. Until Skizz backed off and ran away.

That was humiliating. Impulse couldn’t believe he had allowed himself to get so caught up in his fantasy that he didn’t even acknowledge that Skizz didn’t feel the same. Who was Impulse if not analysing every single outcome? He had forgotten who he was, and for what? A boy?!!

His communicator buzzing insistently snapped him out of his stupor, and he lunged for it, anticipating a message from Skizz.

He had no such luck. But there were multiple messages from Zed, whom Impulse hadn’t heard from in a while. Maybe Impulse should’ve paid more attention to his best friend instead of his stupid crush.

Zed: Hi Impulse!

Zed: Just wondering how you’ve been doing

Zed: Long time with no chats… how’s that boyfriend of yours coming along? ;)

Letting out a fond groan, Impulse grinned and started typing a response. Trust Zed not to be offended even when Impulse had been a crappy friend recently. 

Impulse: hey zed!!

Impulse: i’ve been good, he’s not my boyfriend though lol

Zed: Well why not?! You seemed pretty smitten with him last we talked

Impulse winced, contemplating whether or not he should tell Zed the truth.

Impulse: yeah well some things just don’t work out i guess

Zed: Are you okay, Impulse? Whenever you get all detached like this there’s usually something going on with you

Dangit. Of course Zed would be able to tell. Although maybe it would be good for Impulse to talk about this with someone. Maybe he was just going insane over nothing, and Zed could humble him a bit.

Impulse: it's a bit of a long story

Impulse: can we call or is it too late for you?

Zed: Please, you know I never sleep

Impulse: lol

Impulse: calling you now

Impulse quickly pressed the call button, anxiously tugging on his horn while he waited for Zed to pick up.

A very pale-skinned, purple-eyed face with coily white hair and beige ram horns sticking up from his head suddenly appeared on the screen. Zed grinned, waving at the camera. “You don’t usually video call me, Impulse!” He chuckled.

“Just felt like it today,” Impulse said, trying to sound chipper. He knew he failed miserably when the concern on Zed’s face amplified tenfold.

“What’s wrong, Impy?” Zed asked with a sympathetic smile. “I know there’s something wrong, and you know I won’t stop bothering you until you tell me what it is.”

Impulse sighed. He should’ve known better than to try to hide this from Zed. “I don’t know where I stand with Skizz right now, and it’s driving me nuts.”

“So tell me about it. I’m a good listener—and I can give you advice if you need that too.”

Impulse thought about it for a moment before completely relenting. He knew he had to talk to someone; he didn’t want to go back to his old habit of losing his mind all alone. At least this way, Zed could potentially go insane with him.

Impulse tried to remain detached as he explained the situation to Zed, hoping it would stop the tears from welling up and spilling over. Impulse was sick of crying.

“—Yeah, and then he walked away, and we haven’t spoken since,” Impulse finished, breathing a sigh of relief.

Zedaph stared into the camera, eyes wide and clearly ruminating on something. He tugged on his horns absentmindedly, a stim that was all too familiar to Impulse.

Several aching moments passed before Impulse couldn’t hold himself back, the anxiety too powerful for him to manage. “Zed? What are you thinking about?”

“I think Skizz is just scared!” Zed blurted triumphantly, grinning widely.

“Wha- Huh?” 

“Sorry, sorry, that was a bit sudden.” Zed cleared his throat as he moved his communicator, presumably propping it on his desk so he could pace around. Predictably, Impulse was quickly greeted with the mess of Zed’s room and the ram pacing back and forth between the walls.

“So, you said that Skizz backed off as soon as you didn’t kiss back, correct?” Zed clasped his hands together and stared intently into the camera.

“Yeah… what’s the relevance?” Impulse raised an eyebrow as Zed resumed his furious pacing.

“Well, that to me sounds like he’s worried he hurt your feelings or something adjacent to that.”

“But why?!” Impulse groaned and dragged his hands down his face. “I literally gave him a whole spiel about how I was in love with him right before I kissed him!”

Zed scratched his head, deep in thought. “Hmm… that is a Chinese puzzle.”

“A- a what?”

“Just confusing.” Zed waved dismissively. “Did Skizz ever mention anything potentially upsetting that could make him act like that? A bad relationship or just a regular fear of intimacy? Cause I’m pretty sure this boils down to him being scared of something.”

A memory from the time he slept over jumped out at Impulse, recalling the story Skizz had told him about why he moved schools. But, for whatever reason, Impulse doubted that Skizz being bullied for his dad’s speculated sexuality was enough reason for him to act like that. Skizz didn’t care enough about others’ opinions for that to affect him.

“I can remember something, but I doubt that’s the reason.” Impulse didn’t want to share the reason; it was too personal to Skizz. He just hoped Zed wouldn’t question it too much.

“Well, maybe there’s something that he’s not telling you.” Zed moved closer to the camera. “Cause, Impulse, I really doubt that you not kissing him back was what made him act like that. It’s more likely that it brought up something he didn’t want to remember, and that scared him.”

Impulse sighed, defeated. “You’re probably right. It’s just so weird to me that he wouldn’t communicate that. I know you don’t know him, but I do, and it’s so out of character for him to act like that.”

“He was probably trying to spare your feelings—you did say that you had just spilled your guts to him. He was probably trying to cope with his feelings without hurting yours and just did it poorly.”

“Yeah, that’s probably true. I just wish I knew why.”

“Ask him then. If you’re as close as you say, I’m sure he would be honest with you.” Zed nodded his head encouragingly.

Anxiety swirled within Impulse’s stomach, the once unassuming, almost imperceptible feeling growing stronger by the second. What if Impulse forced Skizz to reveal something traumatising? What if it ruined their friendship? What if Skizz actually hated him, and that was why he backed off?

“Impulseeeee, stop spiralling over there,” Zed teased lightly, clapping his hands in front of the camera.

“You suck,” Impulse sighed, snapping out of his daze.

“I’m right, though.”

“Yeah, you are.” Impulse let out yet another sigh, mentally bracing himself for the awkward conversation that was sure to come. He just hoped that it wouldn’t completely destroy their relationship. And that Skizz texted him first. Impulse was far too scared to make the plans.

Chapter Text

Impulse raised his shaky hand and knocked on the door, unease swimming in his veins and being pumped throughout his entire body. His heart thrummed in his chest, overwhelming and forceful and making him feel slightly lightheaded. Tail curling around his ankle, he waited anxiously for the door to swing open.

Impulse didn’t know how this was going to go. Skizz had messaged him last night, saying to come over in the morning so they could talk, and ever since, Impulse had been obsessively ruminating about it. Would they reconcile? Would they never talk again after this? Would they start dating? Would Skizz say it was one big mistake?

To put it lightly, Impulse was on the verge of a monumental freak-out.

The door swung open, and Skizz stood there, a sheepish smile on his face, and his wings flared out behind him. “Hey, buddy,” he said awkwardly.

Impulse begged his brain for some semblance of composure as he smiled up at Skizz. “Hi,” he murmured. He instantly felt embarrassed by his quiet volume.

“Come in, please.” Skizz shifted to the side and gestured expectantly.

Impulse took a deep breath and stepped inside. The silence of the house overwhelmed him instantly, compelling him to walk upstairs like he had done so many times before.

The click of the door and the resulting footsteps indicated that Skizz was following, deep breaths accompanying the creak of the stairs as they both ended up on the landing. 

A door was suddenly pushed open, and a large, brown dog with a dark snout bounded towards Impulse, nosing into his hand and letting out expectant yips. Impulse dropped to his knees, scratching behind Kevin Bubble’s ear enthusiastically. “Hey, boy,” he whispered. Kevin’s head lolled, tongue hanging out of his mouth.

A soft chuckle from behind Impulse reminded him of Skizz’s presence, and he turned around with a timid smile to see Skizz grinning, halo a faint gold above his head.

Impulse shuddered at the sight. He hated this uncertainty, the actions he once perceived as loving now riddled with ambiguity. It was all down to chance now. And Impulse hated leaving things up to chance.

Moving away from Kevin with a sigh, Impulse walked into Skizz’s room and plonked himself on the edge of the bed. Skizz followed, waiting to see Kevin walk away before closing the door. He turned to look at Impulse, fidgeting with loose feathers in his wing. Anxiety radiated off of him in powerful waves as his lower lip trembled slightly.

Impulse felt determination rise within him, set on getting an answer for Skizz’s behaviour. Because Impulse wasn’t sure how much longer he could handle this uncertainty.

“Skizz, I need to ask you—”

“Impy, I have to tell you something—”

Impulse stared in surprise, with Skizz being equally shocked. It seemed almost cartoonish for both of them to try and speak at the same time. Impulse could’ve sworn this sort of thing only happened in movies.

Skizz moved so he was sitting next to Impulse, their knees knocking together gently. “Can you let me talk first?” Skizz looked at him hopefully, hands clasped and posture stiff.

Impulse nodded slowly, trying his best to examine Skizz for anything that would reveal his motives. He found nothing. Skizz had always been better at reading people than he was.

“Okay, uh—” Skizz took a deep breath. “There’s no easy way to say this, but I lied to you about what caused all the bullying at my old school. It wasn’t because my dad was rumored to be gay.” Skizz winced, looking like he was bracing himself for outrage.

Impulse wasn’t surprised in the slightest. After getting off the call with Zed, he had given the matter rigorous thought for half the night, concluding that Skizz had to have been lying. He just didn’t understand why. Regardless, Impulse knew he should try and act at least a little bit shocked.

He widened his eyes, staring up at Skizz and flicking his tail back and forth for extra dramatics. “Really?” He asked, pitching up his voice slightly.

“Yeah, really. I’m sorry, buddy.” Skizz dropped his head. “I just didn’t want to talk about what really happened—it didn’t seem like the time.”

“Well, now is the time, Skizz. It’s obviously affecting you, affecting how you treat me, and I want to know how I can help you through this.” Impulse took a deep breath, worried that he was being too forward, but he decided to roll with it. “Because I want to be with you, Skizz. But I don’t want you to be uncertain about being with me. So, please, let me in.”

Skizz stared, obviously taken aback by Impulse’s unexpected assertiveness. His wings moved to surround him, leaving only his anxious face visible as he began to speak. “Okay, okay. I went to a New Year’s party in the middle of Junior year, so slightly over a year ago. When I was there, I started talking to this guy in my year called Aster. We’d never spoken much—opposing timetables and all that—but he turned out to be really lovely.”

“We started to talk a bit more, and over time, I started to like him. Like properly like him.” Pink started to tint Skizz’s cheeks and his wings twitched slightly. He blinked hard, resetting his dazed expression into a firmer, determined one. “I’d never really considered that I was… y’know… gay, but I also didn’t think it was as frowned upon as it was.” Skizz sighed sadly, bouncing his knee. “I wish I had known how conservative my old town was sooner.”

Understanding began to wash over Impulse as Skizz looked at him, fear behind those bright blue eyes. All the times their affection had more romantic undertones, Skizz’s aversion to discussing romance as a whole, everything now made sense. 

Despite that, Impulse still felt like he was missing something. There was something Skizz hadn’t said yet, something critical to the story. “What happened next, Skizz?” Impulse inquired softly.

Skizz’s wings twitched violently, his knee beginning to bounce even faster. “One day, we were hanging out at his house,” he started hesitantly. “We were watching Ferris Bueller's Day Off— wait, no, it was Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure. Anyway, I made some stupid joke that made him laugh ridiculously hard.” 

“Once he had recovered, he gave me this look. And before I knew it, he was kissing me.” Skizz let out another sigh. “I was happy at first, but then it started to get more intense and… I dunno, I just started feeling really uncomfortable. Whether it was because I hadn’t really come to terms with my sexuality or just not being ready for anything more than a peck, I’m not sure. But I pulled away from him, and I guess he didn’t like that. He tried again, kept pushing it despite me moving back several times.”

The air became thick with fear as Impulse stared at Skizz, hoping, praying that what he thought had happened hadn’t actually happened. He reached out for Skizz’s hand, squeezing it tightly. “Skizz, he didn’t… You know?”

“Oh my god, no, no, no,” Skizz said quickly. “Nothing that bad. All he did was make me super uncomfortable. I ended up shoving him away and running home, but it did have me on edge for the rest of the weekend. And then I went back to school on Monday.” Skizz laughed bitterly. “Aster had told everyone that I had come on to him, made him uncomfortable, even insinuated that I had taken things further than a kiss.”

“And, even though that insinuation is foul even by itself, with the place I lived in, it was possible for a guy to bounce back from that sorta thing. I’d seen it happen before, and it’s obviously disgusting that it can happen, but I guess what I’m saying is that I probably would’ve been fine.”

“But what really did me in was simply the fact that I was a boy trying to kiss another boy.” Skizz’s eyes began to brim with tears. “I faced so much hate for it, Impulse. Insulted constantly, pushed around, and even glared at by teachers. And I just—” Skizz paused to wipe a tear from his eye. “—It was just crazy to me that the idea of me being gay was more sickening to them than me sexually assaulting someone?! Like, priorities, people!”

“Anyway, we both know how I coped with it, and then I moved to your school yadda yadda and now I’m all happy and stuff but the other night…” Skizz breathed shakily. “I thought I had become him, Impulse. I thought I had made you uncomfortable in the way he did to me.” Tears were now flowing freely down Skizz’s face. “I didn’t do that to you, Impulse, right? Please tell me I didn’t.” Skizz’s voice shook, and his gaze became more desperate, more despairing.

Impulse’s heart shattered into a million pieces. Despite the relief he felt at knowing the truth, it was overshadowed by both sympathy and disgust for how Skizz was treated. He hardly remembered how upset he had been by Skizz’s supposed rejection; all he cared about now was trying to comfort Skizz as best he could.

Shuffling closer, Impulse rubbed soothing circles into Skizz’s shoulder as Skizz cried softly, burying his head in his hands. “Take your time, Skizz,” Impulse whispered.

It was several minutes before Skizz gained his composure, but he continued to sniffle and stare at Impulse, a twinge of distress still written across his face. “Impy, I swear I didn’t mean to—”

“Hey, no, don’t do that.” Impulse reached up to wrap his hands around the back of Skizz’s head and bring him into a hug. “I wasn’t lying when I said you were one of the only people I feel safe around, Skizz,” he murmured into Skizz’s ear. “I know you would never dream of doing something like that, and I’m sorry you thought you did. I’m sure there’s nothing I can say to fix it, and I don’t expect to, but I do want you to know that I did not view that kiss as something uncomfortable.”

Skizz pulled back, a small smile creeping onto his face. “You didn’t?”

“Of course not!” Impulse felt himself beginning to blush. “It was pretty good if I do say so myself.”

“Why didn’t you kiss me back, then?”

Impulse felt embarrassment flood through him instantly, his tail flicking back and forth wildly. “I, uh… forgot that you’re supposed to,” he said sheepishly, tugging on his horn.

Skizz roared with laughter, clutching his sides as he shook with mirth.

“Stop it! I’m embarrassed enough as is,” Impulse pleaded, burying his face in his hands.

Skizz’s laughter slowly lessened, his cheeks bright red from the effort. “Oh, dude, that is one of the greatest things I’ve ever heard.”

“Shut up!” Impulse rolled his eyes and fondly shoved him away. “I have no romantic experience, okay!”

Skizz snickered, scooting over and bumping his shoulder with Impulse’s. He leaned into it, letting Skizz wrap an arm around his shoulder and shift his wings so they cradled his back. The warmth that radiated from Skizz in comforting waves soothed Impulse’s embarrassment, but the implications of such physical affection ignited a new uncertainty in his brain. 

Where did they stand?

Impulse still hadn’t gotten a straight answer from Skizz, and he knew he shouldn’t really prod at Skizz anymore when he’d just shared possibly the most traumatising thing to ever happen to him. But he wasn’t sure he could handle another few days of uncertainty. 

“Something on your mind, Impy Dimpy Dop?” 

Impulse looked upwards to see Skizz watching him, an unsure look on his face. 

What was Impulse doing? Skizz was one of the most open people he knew; it would be unfair to keep this from him, even if it seemed like a bad time. Shifting backwards and taking a deep breath, Impulse spoke. “What are we, Skizz? And please don’t say homie buddies, because I think I might kill you.”

Skizz snorted, giving Impulse a gleeful look. “But we are!”

“Skizz.”

“Fine, fine, fine!” Skizz sighed. “I just don’t really know why I feel so hesitant about admitting that I like you. Because I do. A lot. And I want to be with you, but I just feel…” Skizz mused for a moment, brows furrowed in contemplation. “I don’t know. I just feel like I wouldn’t be good for you, maybe?”

“Well—and forgive me for being a bit harsh—that’s simply not true, Skizz.” Impulse stared at him firmly, reaching out to steady Skizz’s shaky hands.

“But—”

“Nuh-uh. Think about all the times you cut in to stop me from spiralling into a self-hate train, all the times you reminded me that I was losing it over an imagined problem. This is the same as that; the roles are just reversed.”

Impulse watched, breathing subsequent sighs of relief as Skizz’s expression changed from outright fearful to anxious, to mildly apprehensive. Skizz bit his lip, dropping his head like he was suppressing something.

“What is it, Skizz?”

Skizz raised his head slightly, eyes darting back and forth. “I just don’t think I’m the perfect guy you deserve, Impy.”

“Again, not true.” Impulse moved his hand to Skizz’s jaw, lifting his face to look at him properly. “Do you remember what a sniveling, anxious, repressed mess I was when I first met you?”

“Well, I wouldn’t have described it exactly like that.”

“Whatever. Do I need to remind you that you are the person who got me out of that slump? You, Skizz. It didn’t matter that you weren’t perfect, that you’re still not perfect, because you’re an idiot if you think I’m gonna cast you aside simply because you can get flighty—pun intended.”

Skizz snorted again, leaning forward and dropping his head on Impulse’s shoulder. “That was a good one, dude.”

“Mhm, I know.”

Skizz picked himself back up, giving Impulse an exaggerated eye roll. “Did you really mean all that?”

“Of course I did, you idiot. I love you, I’m in love with you, all the things.” Impulse smiled bashfully. “I don’t care that you’re not some mega-intelligent guy with swoopy hair and washboard abs—”

“Hey! I am and have all of those things, homie!”

“—The point is that I want you for exactly what you are, who you are, right now. And quite frankly, I don’t know how much clearer I can be.” Impulse crossed his arms dramatically. “I already gave you this spiel once before, Skizz.”

Skizz smiled, soft and sweet and loving. He squeezed Impulse’s hand, lifting it to his lips and kissing Impulse’s knuckles gently. “Can I say nice things about you now?”

Impulse shivered pleasantly, nodding his head.

“I am so lucky to have met one of the greatest people in the world so young. And maybe it’s too soon to say that, considering we’re only eighteen years old, but I’m confident it’s true.” Skizz’s smile grew adorably wider. “I don’t think there’s anyone else I would rather be with right now. And sure, I clearly have some things to work through—and apparently work on my communication skills that seem to falter when I’m with you—”

“It’s cause you’re so flustered by my handsome face,” Impulse snickered.

“I can agree with that, Impy.”

Impulse choked back a gasp at Skizz’s honesty, feeling his face heat up. 

Skizz’s smile curled into a smirk, eyes narrowing. “But in all seriousness, the thing about you that gets me is your perseverance. Once you set your mind on something, you don’t stop until you get it. It’s an admirable trait, and I am unbelievably honored that I’m one of the things you haven’t given up on.”

“Bleugh, talk about a corny rom-com speech.” Impulse mimed a gagging motion.

“Wha- Shut up!” Skizz shoved him playfully. “I pour my heart out, and that’s your response?”

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I just can’t take all that seriously.” 

“Well, I guess we both have things to work on, then.” Skizz crossed his arms, pouting like a child. However, the hint of a smile and sparkling eyes betrayed his true thoughts.

Impulse felt his own cheeky smile stretch across his face, his knee starting to shake quickly. He stared at Skizz silently, examining every small feature about him. The slight black curls flopping into his face, those piercing yet dreamy blue eyes, the large, soft, white feathers sprouting from his wings, the small smile on his face that filled Impulse with unimaginable peace.

He was perfect. Impulse knew it was corny. But he was. 

Skizz let out a shaky breath, an apprehensive look on his face. “Hey, Impulse?” 

“Yeah, Skizz?” Impulse breathed slowly.

“Can I be your boyfriend?”

A wide, involuntary grin immediately split Impulse’s face, feeling so overjoyed he almost felt overwhelmed. And yet, despite his heart beating out of his chest and feeling slightly lightheaded from happiness, Impulse still had enough clarity to say the answer, the only answer.

“I would love to be your boyfriend, Skizz. I don’t think there’s anything I want more.”

“Eww, gross! So corny!” Skizz mocked, scooting slightly closer.

Impulse rolled his eyes, moving until they were practically a breath apart, noses practically brushing. The heat crept up his neck and onto his cheeks, giving him no semblance of subtlety.

“Hey, Impy,” Skizz whispered, breath hot against Impulse’s face.

“Hi.” Impulse felt his heart race even faster.

“Can I kiss you?” Skizz’s eyes fluttered.

“You won’t.” 

Skizz lifted his hand to graze Impulse’s jaw, capturing his lips and shifting his hand to the back of Impulse’s neck in the same moment. 

Impulse shivered, simultaneously trying to lean back into Skizz’s hand and forward into the soothing warmth of his lips. Love sparked in his veins, all-consuming and feeling more cathartic than Impulse ever thought possible. The sensations overwhelmed him, the press of lips against his, the gentle sway of his own tail, Skizz’s gentle hand that moved up to play with the ends of Impulse’s hair.

He was kissing Skizz. Skizz. The boy he loved, and probably had loved for longer than he wanted to admit. His boyfriend. His boyfriend.

Impulse knew that this was the happiest he might ever be. And that was fine with him.

Impulse gasped as Skizz’s other hand lightly squeezed his waist. He backed up, the sight of Skizz’s red face, parted lips, and shining eyes making his heart flutter. Impulse let out a small, involuntary giggle before simply staring, taking in the sight of him.

Skizz, however, looked shocked, if not scared. “Was that too much?” He asked quickly, eyes wide with concern.

“Void, no! Sorry, sorry!” Impulse laughed awkwardly. “Just got a bit flustered. I just can’t believe that we’re actually together, that I’m actually kissing you.”

Skizz breathed a sigh of relief, visibly deflating. “Good. Scared me, Impy.”

“Sorry.”

They sat there, breathless, for a few moments before Skizz spoke up, smiling cheekily. “Can I kiss you some more now?”

Impulse grinned, winding his hands around the nape of Skizz’s neck and pulling him down. “Please do.”

Chapter Text

“Hey, buddy!” Skizz called as Tango scrambled into the car, shoving Bdubs into the middle seat, much to Bdubs’ chagrin. 

“You freaking suck, Tango!” Bdubs hissed, slapping him on the shoulder.

“Sorry, dude. Not my fault that you’re just a little guy.”

“HEY—”

Tango dissolved into maniacal, uncontrollable giggles. He couldn’t help making fun of Bdubs; it was so easy to rile him up. Looking past Bdubs’ fuming face and at Etho, he saw Etho give him a small, knowing nod.

Tango let out a small snicker that devolved into a yelp as the car jerked forward, due to him being too distracted by laughing at Bdubs to buckle in.

“And that’s what they call… karma.” Bdubs chuckled, wrenching Tango back into place.

Tango simply rolled his eyes, clicking the seatbelt into place before contorting his whole body to talk to Skizz. “So, Skizz Leman.”

“Yes, Tango Top of the Tek variety?”

“Why did you pick all of us up first instead of Impulse? He lives way closer to you than we do.” Tango rested his chin on the edge of the driver's seat, waiting for an answer expectantly.

“That’s what we said!” Bdubs chimed in.

“Yeah, it doesn’t make the most sense, Skizz,” Etho added with a lighthearted laugh.

“Why can’t I just pick up my buddies first, huh?” Skizz turned to look at them briefly, feigning offense. “Maybe I just wanted you guys to know that I love you!”

Tango rolled his eyes fondly and let out a scoff. “Okay, okay, we love you too, Skippy. Now eyes on the road, please.”

Skizz smirked, and turned around.

Tango settled into his seat, intermittently pushing Bdubs away whenever he started to manspread. It kept him occupied while he thought about what Skizz was actually playing at. 

Tango wasn’t that stupid. Skizz knew he wasn’t that stupid. Clearly, though, Skizz might be that stupid if he decided to pick up Etho and Bdubs first—who lived fifteen minutes away—instead of Impulse, who lived less than two minutes away. It made zero rational sense. Skizz was playing at something here. And Tango wanted to know what. 

Even more, he wanted to know why Skizz was lying.

The car eventually came to a stop outside Impulse’s house, and Skizz turned the car off and stared at Impulse’s front door.

“Why’d you turn the car off?” Bdubs asked, eyebrow raised.

“Yeah, aren’t we just heading to school right after this?” Etho shifted forward so he was looking at Skizz, eyebrow also raised.

Skizz let out a chuckle and glanced back at them. “I’m just trying to save some fuel, gentlemen.”

“Dude, you’re not gonna save that much fuel by turning the car off for one minute while we wait for Impulse.” Tango raised his eyebrow, partly to copy Etho and Bdubs, and partly from genuine confusion.

Skizz just waved him away. Tango made a grumbling noise and slumped back in his seat.

Unsurprisingly, Skizz squeaked excitedly when Impulse appeared in the doorway, making his wings twitch excitedly and his halo begin to glow faintly above his head. 

Typical. Truly, it was sickening for Tango to watch. Tango knew that he must have looked the same while he was pining after Jimmy, which was a thought that filled him with embarrassment and humiliation. He did love Jimmy, really, but seeing Skizz act the same way he must’ve was humbling to say the least.

Impulse seemed no better. The guy had a newfound pep in his step, practically bouncing giddily as he walked up to the passenger side door.

As long-winded as this crush had been, Tango still hadn’t lost hope. Those two were idiots, but they were each other's idiots. It was bound to happen eventually, if not within the next few months.

“Hi guys!” Impulse exclaimed, hopping into the car with a grin.

“Heyyy, Impulse!” Etho’s eyes crinkled above his mask.

“Hey, baby!” Bdubs grinned.

Tango simply waved, focusing much too hard on why Skizz hadn’t said anything yet. Usually, Impulse couldn’t even take a breath before Skizz started talking to him. 

Tango watched as Impulse glanced over at Skizz, a small smile on his face. “Hi, Skizz,” he said brightly.

“Hey, Impy!” Skizz said with equal enthusiasm.

Silence fell between the two of them, much to Tango’s surprise. What were these two playing at? 

“Missed you.” Impulse leaned over the center console, staring at Skizz intently.

“I saw you yesterday,” Skizz laughed.

Bdubs made a strangled sound that Tango couldn’t decipher.

“Still missed you,” Impulse said, voice pitching up slightly.

“Hmmm…” Skizz rubbed his chin thoughtfully. “I can fix that.” He leaned in and kissed Impulse right on the lips, lifting his hand to graze Impulse’s jaw.

The other three erupted instantaneously. Bdubs was hooting and hollering while bouncing up and down in his seat, shaking the whole car. Etho’s jaw dropped open so wide it was visible through his mask, a confused noise coming from his throat.

Tango could hardly believe it. He was completely shell-shocked, staring at Skizz kissing Impulse like a voyeuristic freak. “Hey, hey, break it up,” He snickered, smile growing wider as Skizz and Impulse looked at him with equally flushed and confused expressions. 

Tango lunged forward, gripping Skizz by the shoulders and shaking him like a ragdoll—or, trying to at least. “When did this happen??!!” He squawked, feeling so overwhelmed with happiness that he thought he might burst.

“Literally yesterday,” Impulse laughed, cheeks growing redder by the second.

“Impulse wanted to tell you all straight up, but c’mon!” Skizz grinned, a mischievous twinkle in his eye. “You’re friends with me! I wasn’t gonna be normal about it.”

Etho let out an exasperated sigh that failed to mask the way his eyes crinkled at the edges.

“Unbelievable,” Tango muttered, rolling his eyes.

“Hey! You love us!” Skizz pouted and stared at him intently. 

“Yeah, yeah, I do, whatever.”

“Wha— c’mon! So mean, Tango!”

Bdubs laughed and stuck his head in between the two front seats. “He’s just being stupid. We’re happy for you both, really.”

“Meh-meh-meh-meh-meh-meh-meh,” Tango scoffed.

Skizz burst into laughter, quickly followed by Impulse and Bdubs. Etho tried to remain stoic, but Tango could see his gently shaking shoulders.

Skizz wiped his eyes and grinned over at Tango. “That was a good one, dude.”

“Why, thank you,” Tango smirked before letting his sarcastic facade drop for a moment. “Really, though, very happy for you two. It was about time—talk about dragging things out.”

“Thanks, Tango,” Impulse smiled, shooting Skizz a brief, love-filled glance.

Tango felt his heart warm at the sight. He truly couldn’t be happier for those two, even if he was pretending to be snarky about it. Watching them pine and long after each other for the past six months had been downright excruciating. It truly was about time.

A contented lull filled the car as Tango looked between the happy couple with glee, Bdubs grinned at Skizz, and Impulse and Skizz kept their gazes firmly locked on each other.

“So…” Etho cut in. “Are we going to school, or?”

Tango snorted, shooting Etho a cheeky smile. “Get a load of this guy!” 

“I don’t wanna be late, okay!”

“Our best friends finally got together after six months, and all you care about is your punctuality?! Some friend.”

Etho simply rolled his eyes, turning away from Tango with a huff.

Tango smiled smugly. He knew he was being a jerk. But he still couldn’t help himself—how could Etho be focusing on school when the moment they had all been waiting for had finally come?

Tango had always been Impulse and Skizz’s biggest supporter—in his own very humble opinion—and he was going to continue to do that. And he was also going to embarrass them as much as possible. That was a promise.

—

Grian slumped backward in his seat, already feeling the urge to fly away as far as he could. It was something about this classroom, he was certain. He didn’t usually feel claustrophobic, but this room really did him in.

Looking over at Scar, he saw that Scar was working on his design portfolio with a devoted, intent stare. 

Grian smiled. It was always nice to see the passion that Scar had for architecture. Grian knew it would take him far in life, and he was excited to see it happen.

Laughter quickly sifted into the room, echoing guffaws accompanying more reserved giggles.

Impulse and Skizz, noisy as per usual.

Looking towards the door, Grian watched as they entered the room, shoulders pressed together and both staring at the other with a dreamy look in their eyes. Sickening. Truly sickening. Grian was used to it by now, and yet, he found himself paying slightly closer attention to the way Skizz put a gentle hand on Impulse’s back and the way Impulse flushed pink at the touch.

Something was off. Something had changed. Grian wasn’t sure how he knew, but he did.

“Look who decided to show up,” Grian snickered, narrowing his eyes in a playful manner that hopefully masked his true goal: to scrutinize these two into oblivion.

“Hey, G!” Skizz grinned, sitting down next to him with a smile. “How are ya this morning?”

Grian mimed a yawn. “Very tired.” He glanced over at Impulse, who was continuing to stare at Skizz with an almost loving gaze.

Those two made Grian feel a bit sick.

Skizz made a sympathetic noise before turning right back around and asking Impulse something that Grian didn’t pay attention to. Instead, Grian shifted so he was slumped forward, and peeking over his own arm to see if he could catch them doing something incriminating.

Impulse was chattering aimlessly, gesturing back and forth. He had a big smile on his face, and his tail swayed gently. Grian couldn’t see Skizz’s expression, but he had his hand on Impulse’s knee, and his wings twitched in a manner that Grian knew was joy. Skizz couldn’t hide his mannerisms when he had another avian watching him. 

Looking closer, Grian noticed a faint yellow glow cast onto Skizz’s dark hair. Glancing up, Grian saw the very bright, almost blinding glow of Skizz’s halo.

Weird. Was Skizz even trying to be subtle about his feelings anymore? Did he not realize that Impulse knew the meaning of that now?

Grian looked back down just in time to catch Impulse mouth something that looked suspiciously like ‘I love you.’ Skizz lifted his hand to briefly graze Impulse’s jaw before dropping it back down like nothing had happened. Impulse’s eyelashes fluttered, and his cheeks grew a deeper pink.

Surely Grian had seen it wrong.

“I love you too, Impy,” Skizz whispered, not quite faint enough.

Grian snapped upwards with a strangled squawk, staring wide-eyed as they both turned to look at him, eyes similarly wide.

“Did you just say what I think you said?” Grian said quickly, his own wings flared.

“What did they say, Grian?” Scar’s chin suddenly landed on Grian’s shoulder.

“Skizz just told Impulse that he loves him,” Grian said, slower this time. He narrowed his eyes on Skizz ever so slightly. “Right, Skizz?”

Impulse’s poorly stifled snort was all the proof Grian needed.

“I KNEW IT!” He screeched, lunging forward to wrap both of them in a hug. Pulling back, Grian crossed his arms and stared down at them smugly. “I sensed a difference the second you both walked in the room.”

Skizz let out an exasperated laugh and gently pushed him away. “You suck, Grian.”

“And you are a terrible liar,” Impulse giggled, squeezing Skizz’s arm. “Good to know that my boyfriend won’t be able to get anything by me.”

“Wait, did I miss something?” Scar stared, expression saturated with confusion. “Did you just call Skizz your boyfriend, Impulse?”

“Oh, Scar,” Grian groaned.

“What?! I’m really confused over here, guys!”

Impulse laughed, staring up at Skizz with an utterly lovesick stare. “Should we tell him? He does seem very confused.”

“Of course we will!” Skizz smiled and looked over at Scar. “I asked out Impulse over the weekend, and he said yes. So yes, I am his boyfriend, buddy.”

“Void, it was about time,” Scar chuckled. “Grian and I were going crazy waiting for you two to get together.”

“Yeah… that seems to be the general consensus.” Impulse laughed awkwardly. 

“And for good reason!” Grian chimed in. “We’ve been waiting months for this day. I even remember saying to Scar that I thought something was up between you two on the first day of our group project.”

“Jeez, has it really been that long?” Skizz winced, leaning his head against Impulse’s.

“Yep.” Grian smiled cheekily, but he could feel his heart swelling with happiness. Those two idiots really did deserve each other.

—

“Hey, Martyn!” Jimmy jogged towards him with a wide smile. 

“Oh, hey, dude!” Martyn grinned and stopped walking for a moment.

Jimmy caught up to him, taking a moment to catch his breath before speaking again. “So, how was the clean-up on Saturday morning?” Jimmy winced as he remembered how the kitchen had looked by the end of the night. Was it so impossible for teenagers to respect the host even a little bit?

Martyn winced in unison, a sheepish smile on his face. “Let's just say that my mum was not very happy with me. One of her favorite vases may or may not have been smashed…”

“Come on, dude!”

“Yeah, Skizz was right to warn me about hosting.”

Jimmy let out a sympathetic sigh and patted Martyn on the shoulder. “Sorry, man.”

“It’s fine, I’ll buy her a new one.” Martyn shrugged and gestured down the hallway. “You heading this way?”

“Yeah, I have a free right now.” Jimmy smiled and started walking down the hallway.

“Hey, we’re going this way too!” A feminine voice called from behind him.

Jimmy whipped his head around to see Gem and Pearl, hand in hand and smiling eagerly. “Hi, guys!” He waved excitedly.

“Hey,” Gem said, pulling Pearl along so they were all walking in a line. “Where’s everyone going?”

“Library,” Jimmy replied.

“Theatre arts.” Martyn grinned.

“Nerd,” Gem scoffed playfully. “Anyway, Pearl and I have art.”

“Nice, nice.” Jimmy looked between them both with a warm smile. They were so cute together. It was so unfair that they had to do long distance in just a few months. But Jimmy wasn’t about to bring that up to them—he knew it was a touchy subject. “How are your guys’ portfolios going, anyway?” He said quickly.

“Good, good,” Pearl sighed. “I kinda hate mine right now, but that happens every time I paint, so I’m just pushing on.”

“Yeah, and it’s beautiful anyway, so who cares?” Gem grinned, leaning into Pearl’s side.

Martyn laughed, smiling over at Pearl. “I get you, Pearl. I go through the same thing with the production every single year.”

“And it turns out great every year!” Jimmy added with a supportive smile.

Martyn grinned and clapped Jimmy on the back. “Thanks, dude! I hope I live up—” Martyn paused, going completely still save for his jaw dropping wide open. “Are you guys seeing what I’m seeing?” He pointed to the end of the hallway.

Jimmy squinted and saw two people, hand in hand, with wide white wings sprouting from one person’s back and a tail swishing back and forth from the other person.

No way. Was it actually them?

“Is that—” Pearl started.

“Impulse and Skizz??!!” Gem screeched excitedly, making the two people look up at the four of them standing stock still and staring them down.

“Hey, guys!” Skizz called, grinning like crazy. “Wanna say hi to me and my boyfriend, or are you just gonna stand there?!”

The four of them erupted simultaneously, yelling excitedly. Gem sprinted towards the two of them, wrapping them in a giant hug. Pearl quickly followed, giving Impulse a quick hug. 

Jimmy jogged over, the twitching of his wings telling him that he was failing miserably to suppress the excitement he felt for them. He knew it would happen soon after what Tango told him, but that didn’t undermine how overwhelmed with happiness he was at knowing they were finally together. He knew that he wasn’t the only one, either.

“It was about time, you idiots!” Gem exclaimed, bouncing up and down with a huge smile on her face.

“We’ve all been waiting for this day,” Martyn laughed, reaching out to give Skizz and Impulse a fist bump each.

“Jeez, didn’t realize how many of you were rooting for us.” Impulse chuckled shyly before looking up at Skizz. “Maybe we should’ve moved a bit quicker, huh?”

“Yeah, this isn’t our finest moment, Impy.” Skizz snickered and slid an arm around him.

Jimmy smiled so widely he could feel his face stretching. He really couldn’t be happier for them. Sure, watching them pine after each other had been very painful, but it was so worth it to see it finally happen. “Love you guys,” he said with a bashful smile.

“Love you too, Jiggles!” Skizz reached out to fist-bump him.

“Does this mean we’re all going to prom together?” Gem asked, looking up at Pearl with an excited smile.

“Oh, for sure,” Impulse said, looking up at Skizz with wide, loving eyes.

Gem failed to suppress an excited noise, much to everyone else’s amusement.

Jimmy felt his heart warming as he looked at Impulse and Skizz laughing in each other's arms. He really couldn’t think of two people who deserved each other more.

—

“See ya, Top!” Skizz said, grinning over at Tango, who was scrambling out of the car.

“See ya, lovebirds,” Tango snickered, waving at them both before slamming the door shut.

Skizz rolled his eyes fondly. Trust Tango to mock him instead of saying that he’s happy for him. Skizz knew that it was all one big facade to hide the fact that Tango was actually a softie. 

Looking back over at Impulse, Skizz hardly had time to blink before Impulse was kissing him, slow and sweet. His hands slid into Skizz’s wings, drawing a shiver from him as Skizz lifted his hands to cup Impulse’s face. It was still slightly uncoordinated, but Skizz wouldn’t have it any other way. All that mattered was that it was with Impulse.

Impulse pulled back, face flushed and lips parted. He was utterly adorable, and Skizz could barely stop himself from closing the distance again. “Hey, Impy,” he whispered instead.

“Hi, Skizz.” Impulse smiled up at him. “How are you feeling after today?”

“Great. Still can’t believe everyone was so excited that we’re together now.”

“Neither! Were we really that bad?”

“Apparently!” Skizz grinned and pressed a kiss to Impulse’s forehead. “Wouldn’t have it any other way though.”

Impulse giggled and rolled his eyes. “You’re such a sap.”

“You love it.” Skizz smirked and leaned down to kiss Impulse again. 

Impulse happily reciprocated, slinging his hands over Skizz’s shoulders and playing with the ends of his hair. Time moved by in a daze, Skizz not noticing anything except lips on his and hands in his hair.

Skizz still couldn’t believe this was real. He wasn’t sure he ever would.

Out of nowhere, Impulse pulled back with a suprised noise. Skizz instantly felt the absence of Impulse’s kiss, but more so confusion at Impulse’s sudden withdrawal. “You okay, Impy?”

“Yes, yes!” Impulse said quickly, digging through his bag for his communicator. He pulled it out and brandished it with an excited smile that made Skizz’s heart feel impossibly full. “Just remembered that I haven’t told Zed yet. You wanna meet him?” Impulse smile became slightly more nervous.

“Of course I do!” Skizz grinned and scooted as close as he could without sitting on the center console. “Call him up!”

Impulse grinned and started typing out a quick message to Zed that was received just as fast. Impulse took a deep breath and pressed the call button.

A face appeared on the screen, so pale he was almost white, with striking purple eyes and ram horns sprouting between coily white hair. “Hey, Impulse! What’s up, man?” Zed exclaimed, a strange yet endearing accent ringing clear through his voice.

“Nothing much, dude.” Impulse breathed out a laugh and grinned at the screen. “I was just wondering if you wanted to meet my boyfriend.”

“Your what?!” Zed shrieked, eyes going wide. “Did you finally ask him out?!”

Impulse snickered and glanced at Skizz with a small smile. “No, he asked me.”

“Lame. Put him on, Impulse!” Zed started clapping his hands excitedly. “I’ve been waiting to meet the famous Skizz!”

Impulse let out a groan and turned the communicator.

Skizz grabbed it, waving at Zed excitedly. “Hey, man! Heard a lot about you!”

“Same goes! Impulse has been talking about you for about six months now I think.” Zed grinned cheekily.

Skizz let out a loud laugh, looking over at Impulse, who was growing redder by the second.

“You’re the worst!” Impulse groaned, burying his head in his hands.

“I think it’s cute, Dimpy Dop.” Skizz leaned over to wrap his arm around Impulse.

Zed raised an eyebrow on the little communicator screen. “Dimpy Dop? Is that a nickname or something?”

Impulse’s head shot straight up, and he stared at Skizz with a teasing glint in his eye. “You did it again!”

Skizz facepalmed, feeling his body shake with laughter. He wasn’t sure he could ever stop coming up with nicknames for Impulse, even if he wanted to. It was basically a compulsion at this point.

“Void, you two are sickening,” Zed laughed. “Definitely meant to be.”

“Thanks, Zed!” Impulse smiled warmly. “How have you been, anyway?”

“Well, actually…” Zed trailed off as a grin came over his face, somehow bigger than his previous reaction to the news. “I have some really good news for you.”

“Go on,” Impulse said, audibly and visibly confused.

Zed took a deep breath and let out a nervous chuckle. “I applied for a scholarship to the college in your city, and I got a full ride. So, I’ll be moving literally an hours drive from you in August.”

Skizz felt a huge grin split his face as he looked over at Impulse. Impulse was completely still, save for his slightly pouted lip and the tears that had begun to stream down his face. “Are you serious?” Impulse said shakily, sniffling at the same time.

“I am.” Zed’s nervous smile melted into a more sincere one. “I just didn’t wanna tell you in case it didn’t work out. But it did, and I’ll see you in August, Impulse!”

Impulse started sobbing almost instantaneously, but his face was overcome by a huge, uncontrollable smile.

Skizz moved his arm so he was cradling Impulse properly, gently wiping the tears from his face. He couldn’t help but let out a small laugh at Impulse’s emotional reaction, while simultaneously feeling more love than he thought was possible. He knew Impulse was emotional, but this was downright adorable and hilarious. Skizz was definitely going to be holding this over Impulse’s head later.

“Void, sorry,” Impulse murmured, lifting his head up to smile at both Skizz and Zed. “Just can’t believe it. Five years of friendship and we finally get to meet eachother.”

“It was about time, Impulse.” Zed chuckled. “Anyway, I gotta go to sleep cause it’s like, midnight here right now.” Zed nodded his head at the screen. “Lovely to meet you, Skizz!”

“Nice to meet you too, dude! Goodnight!” Skizz said cheerily. Zed was every bit as nice as he had imagined.

Impulse quickly said his goodbyes before hanging up the call and looking over at Skizz with a deflated sigh. “What a day.” He leaned his head against the back of the seat.

“It was a lot,” Skizz sighed happily. Every day that passed he thought couldn’t get better than the last, and then it did. It was nice to feel the sense of positivity that he had been lacking for so long. 

Skizz’s communicator dinged in his pocket, much to his surprise. Pulling it out and reading the first message, he couldn’t help but let out a deep belly laugh.

“What?” Impulse asked confusedly.

“Listen to this message Tango just sent me,” Skizz wheezed, wiping tears from his own eyes. “Why are you guys still in my driveway? If I come down there and that car is shaking, I will call the police myself.”

Impulse snorted, turning around to try and look into Tango’s window with little success. 

Skizz felt his wings shaking with mirth as he too, tried to look up at Tango but instead being met with closed blinds. “He’s unbelievable, dude.”

Impulse snickered. “Gotta love him, though.”

“Gotta love him,” Skizz parroted. “Come on, Dimpy Dop, let me take you home.”

“Sounds good, Skizz,” Impulse replied, reaching out to hold Skizz’s hand once they had set off down the road.

Skizz simply smiled, not wanting anything to distract from this moment. He was dating the boy he loved, he had more friends than he thought he would ever have, and most of all, he had hadn’t felt this happy in his entire life.

The Skizz from Junior year would be proud of him. He made it, just as he always hoped he would. And he couldn’t be more grateful.

Chapter Text

Laughter and jokes filled the house, floating up from downstairs and sifting into Impulse’s bedroom. He sighed contentedly as he pulled on his black suit jacket, comforted by the sound of his friends laughing downstairs. 

He couldn’t be more grateful for the past few months. Getting out of his shell, experiencing more than he ever thought he would, and on top of it all, finding Skizz. His knight in shining armor, as corny as it was to think that. Impulse never thought he would live a life like this, a life so full of love and happiness and everything he ever wanted. But here he was, on his prom night, listening to the laughter of his closest friends as he got ready to go to prom with the only boy he’d ever loved.

He was unbelievably happy. He also knew that they would be expecting him to walk downstairs any minute now.

Taking a deep breath, Impulse checked himself in the mirror one final time. His hair was freshly combed and swept to the side, all of his piercings were changed to bolder, more extravagant gold jewelry, and his suit was both spotless and wrinkleless. The black dress shoes were squeezing his feet in all the wrong places, but he supposed it was the price of keeping his dad happy.

In his humble opinion, he looked pretty good.

Snatching his gold tie, Impulse walked downstairs. Jimmy and Bdubs’ laughter and Tango’s snickering became more audible by the second. 

Impulse slowly started walking down the stairs, beginning to regret agreeing to Skizz’s request that they not see each other until both of them are ready. What was this, a wedding? Walking down the stairs like this felt awfully dramatic.

The others came into view as Impulse slowly descended, and the sound of Skizz shushing all of them hit Impulse’s ears. Great. Now he really was performing for them. Trying to ignore the stares of the others, Impulse looked down at Skizz, who was staring back with an utterly lovestruck gaze.

Impulse couldn’t help but smile as he saw Skizz’s black suit that matched his, save for the navy blue tie. Skizz’s hair was slicked back, revealing his fresh silver eyebrow piercing and silver drop earrings hanging from each ear. Impulse could almost see the cutouts in the back of the suit to accommodate his broad white wings, which were stretched wide and twitching with anticipation. And, unsurprisingly, Skizz was wearing Converse with his suit in some attempt to look ‘cool,’ as he had explained to Impulse earlier.

Impulse did think Skizz looked pretty cool. Pretty handsome as well.

“Look at this guy!” Tango snickered, grinning at Impulse and flicking a stray blond hair out of his own face.

Impulse rolled his eyes fondly as he jumped off the final step, landing in front of Skizz with a bashful smile. “Hey, Skizz.”

“Hi, Dimpers.” Skizz smiled down at him, his halo glowing brighter by the second. “You look handsome.”

“You too, Skizz.” Impulse kept his eyes trained on Skizz, barely resisting the urge to lunge forward and kiss the breath out of him right there.

“We’re still here, by the way,” Etho cut in, eyes crinkled at the edges.

Impulse shifted his head to the right, seeing Bdubs, Jimmy, and Tango all trying to suppress a laugh. Rolling his eyes yet again, Impulse stood on his tiptoes, kissed Skizz on the cheek, and then stepped aside to admire the rest of his friends.

Jimmy was wearing a navy blue suit that was neatly tailored to accommodate his golden wings, paired with white dress shoes that matched his white dress shirt. Jimmy’s maroon pocket square matched Tango’s suit, which had its own dark blue pocket square. Tango was also wearing Converse, but his were a dark red color to match his suit.

Bdubs was in a dark green suit with a white undershirt and tie, and white dress shoes to match. Etho was in the inverse of that outfit, with him tugging on the collar of his dark green shirt while he shifted uncomfortably. It was clear that he didn’t seem comfortable in this outfit, but he was still doing it for Bdubs. Impulse found that even more adorable, knowing that Etho didn’t want to go to prom to begin with.

“Very snazzy, guys,” Impulse said, smiling cheekily.

“Thanks, baby!” Bdubs grinned. “You look great as well!”

“Doesn’t he?” Skizz wrapped an arm around Impulse’s shoulder and pressed a kiss to the top of his head.

Tango scoffed, crossing his arms and tapping his foot impatiently. “You guys are sickening.”

“Why, thank you!” Skizz pressed another kiss to Impulse’s temple.

Impulse giggled, leaning up and kissing Skizz on the cheek before wriggling away from him for a moment.

“Where are ya going, Impy?” Skizz asked.

“Looking for my dad.” Impulse smiled sheepishly. “I think he’s been hiding in the kitchen this whole time.”

Etho let out a snort, and Bdubs, Jimmy, and Tango’s eyes grew as wide as dinner plates. “He’s been here the whole time?” Tango said, visibly aghast.

“Yeah! I think he’s been cutting up fruit for the past half an hour! Not sure what, but ever since he learned I like mango, he buys them in bulk.” Impulse looked between the three of them, whose faces were growing more horrified by the second. “Is something the matter, guys?”

“They’ve been making uh—” Skizz leaned closer to Impulse’s ear with a smirk. “Inappropriate jokes for the past twenty minutes…”

Impulse let out a groan and stared at them with playful disappointment. “Come on, man! I invite you all into my house, and this is what you do?!”

The exaggerated clearing of a throat was heard from the distance, making Impulse snap his head towards the kitchen.“¿Niño? ¿Qué pasa?” The same voice called.

“Nothing, papá! Come in here!” Impulse shot Tango, Jimmy, and Bdubs one more lighthearted glare before his dad shuffled into the room, holding out a big plate of mangoes. His dad stopped in his tracks, placing the plate down on the table before staring at him with a wide smile on his face.

“Look at you, niño!” His dad walked over and gave him a brief but warm hug. “¡Te ves tan guapo, mi hijo!”

“Gracias papá.” Impulse flushed, but let his dad press a kiss to his forehead. He didn’t think he looked that handsome, but it was nice to hear it from his dad. Turning around, he saw everyone staring, jaws dropped open—except for Skizz and Jimmy. Had Impulse really not mentioned to the others that his dad was Latino? “Anyway, guys,” he chose to move on instead of having this conversation with his dad right there. “This is my dad!”

“Angel Silva-Valderaz. But that’s Mr. Valderaz to all of you except Skizz here.” His dad reached out to give Skizz a friendly pat on the back before sticking his hand out expectantly to the other four.

They all shook his hand briskly, with Bdubs and Etho offering up hesitant smiles and eyebrow raises as they introduced themselves.

“Lovely to meet you, Mr Valdez,” Tango chirped, not realizing his mistake until Impulse’s dad narrowed his eyes and crossed his arms.

“Val-de-raz.” He said firmly. “Not Valdez. I cannot believe my son hasn't taught his friends how to properly say his last name.” He gave Impulse a quick wink before glowering at Tango again.

“Sorry, sorry, Mr Valderaz.” Tango apologized quickly, shooting Impulse a brief, panicked stare. Impulse gave Tango a comforting smile, knowing how his dad was coming across. He seemed like this stern, tough dad, but he was really just a big softie. He did this exact thing to Skizz when Impulse first brought him home. The only difference was that Skizz caught onto the act right away, which was probably why his dad loved Skizz so much.

His dad’s stern gaze fell apart as he turned to Impulse with a beaming smile. “So, niño, are you messing up your outfit yourself, or am I putting your tie on for you?”

“What do you think?” Impulse grinned and pushed it into his hands. “I left it off just so you could do it.”

His dad smiled gratefully as he wound the tie into Impulse’s shirt collar and tied it into a knot that Impulse couldn’t comprehend. He tentatively patted Impulse on the shoulder before giving him a proper hug. “You make me proud,” he whispered.

“Thanks, papá. Love you.”

“Te quiero, hijo mío.” His dad leaned back and tried to subtly wipe a tear from his eye before clapping his hands together excitedly. “Oh, I have your flowery thingies for you and your Skizz!” He quickly vanished into the kitchen before reappearing with a white box. “I don’t know why these had to be refrigerated, since you’re not eating them, but here you go!” He pushed the box into Impulse’s hands with a smile.

Impulse smiled gratefully before popping the box open, revealing two beautiful boutonnieres. Both had white flowers, but one had gold ribbons and detailing woven into it, whereas the other had navy blue beading and a more transparent ribbon holding it together. 

Skizz suddenly appeared in front of him, gently picking the navy blue one and pinning it to the left lapel of Impulse’s jacket. Impulse followed suit, pinning the gold boutonniere to Skizz. Stepping back, Impulse smiled lovingly as he saw that their outfits were finally complete.

“Aren’t we cute?” Skizz murmured, tucking a stray strand of hair behind Impulse’s ear.

“Yeah,” Impulse whispered back, feeling his tail swish gently.

“Oh, my two boys!” Impulse’s dad stepped in between them, a big smile on his face and a hand over his heart. He clicked his tongue playfully. "Looking at these two getting all cozy already. Shouldn't expect anything less from this one, aye Gordito?" He reached out to pat Skizz on the arm, "Mi Guapito y mi Gordito. Like Beauty and the Beast, no?"

Impulse’s jaw dropped, mortification filling him almost instantly as a cheeky smile came over his dad’s face. “Papá! You can’t say that!”

“Do I wanna know the specifics?” Skizz asked, cocking his head to the side.

“See? ¡Mira, no tiene idea!” His dad crossed his arms, a mischievous glint appearing in his eye.

Skizz stared blankly, an awkward smile on his face. 

Impulse’s dad gestured with a smile that somehow became more mischievous. “No se… It’s fine! I like him, what more do you want? If he wants to know, he needs to learn Spanish.” He leaned closer to Impulse and mumbled, “more like Beauty and the Feast, anyway.”

Impulse made a strangled noise of horror, looking over at Skizz and breathing a sigh of relief when Skizz didn’t react at all. He had never been so grateful that Skizz sucked at Spanish. And that he had selective hearing. He would have to make sure it stayed that way until his dad finally stopped with the jokes—if such a thing was possible. “Don’t worry about it, Skizz. Just an inside joke with me and him.” Impulse reached out to squeeze Skizz’s arm comfortingly.

Skizz raised an eyebrow, but quickly relented once Impulse widened his eyes slightly. “Okay, Dimpy Dop.” He reached out to grab Impulse’s hand and hold it to his lips, pressing a gentle kiss there. “Are you ready to go then? Doors open in ten.”

Impulse’s dad let out a short, sharp whistle. "Oi!” 

Impulse turned around to see his dad standing there, camera in hand and tapping his foot expectantly. ¿Estás loca en la cabeza? You think you can walk away without photos? Your mother will kill me.“

Impulse let out a playful groan. They were going to be here a while.

… 

The music was overwhelming the moment Impulse stepped into the venue, the bass reverberating through the building and feeling like it was violently rattling his brain. Wincing, he continued walking through the crowd, pulling Skizz along until they found a corner where the music wasn’t so deafening. Impulse looked around, seeing vines hanging from the walls, flowers decorating the tables, and small cutouts of animals and seemingly enchanted beings. 

Who was in charge of giving the ‘enchanted forest’ themed prom music that didn’t reflect that in the slightest? Impulse would love to have a word with them.

“You doing okay, Dimpy Dop?” Skizz scooted closer and wrapped his arm around Impulse’s shoulders.

“Yeah, just loud.” Impulse dropped his head onto Skizz’s shoulder and shivered pleasantly as a wing tickled his back. 

Skizz let out a dejected sigh. “Yeah, I know. Maybe they’ll lower the volume later if enough people complain about it.”

They sat in contented silence for a few moments, with Impulse doing his best to drown out the deafening music and loud chatter of his peers. Etho, Bdubs, Jimmy, and Tango had already melted into the crowd, presumably looking for some of their other friends or grabbing a drink. 

If Impulse was being honest, he was just here for the experience. He was perfectly happy to spend his time tucked in a corner with Skizz and maybe dancing a little bit later in the night. He would rather come and hate it than not come at all and have to deal with the raging FOMO later.

And he mostly wanted to see Skizz in a suit.

“Whatcha guys doin’?” A familiar voice cooed above him.

Looking up, Impulse was met with the friendly face of Pearl, with Gem standing on her tiptoes and attempting to peer over Pearl’s shoulder. “Hi!” He exclaimed.

“Hey!” Gem sidled in next to him, bumping their shoulders together. “Bit loud in here, isn’t it?”

“Yeah! Dimpers was just saying that!” Skizz said enthusiastically. “Do you wanna ask them to turn it down?”

“Yeah, c’mon, Skizz.” Gem quickly got back on her feet and stalked off towards the DJ’s area. Skizz popped up as well, giving Impulse’s hand a quick squeeze before jogging to catch up with a very determined Gem.

Pearl let out a fond chuckle, her eyes following Gem until she vanished around the corner. Sitting down next to Impulse, she looked at him with a bright smile. “So, how are you doing, Impy?”

“Good, good. Already tired, if I’m being honest.”

“Honestly, fair enough. I’m waiting for the good music to come on so I can get dancin’, but who knows when that will be.”

Impulse chuckled and smiled up at Pearl. “Don’t you like the trashy DJ remixes of pop songs?”

“Don’t you start with me.”

Impulse laughed harder as Pearl narrowed her eyes playfully, giving him a gentle shove before resetting her face into a smile. 

To his relief, the deafening music quieted in an instant, the once-overwhelming bass reduced to a complementary background track that encouraged conversation rather than suppressing it. Letting out a happy sigh, Impulse looked over to see Gem marching back towards them, a satisfied smile on her face. Skizz trailed behind, simply pointing to Gem with an awestruck look.

“She’s a stud!” He mouthed dramatically.

Impulse snickered, moving over so Skizz could slide in next to him.

“Problem solved!” Gem chirped, giving her hair a toss.

“I have never loved you more,” Pearl said playfully, getting to her feet and wrapping an arm around Gem’s shoulders.

“Yeah, she really took care of it.” Skizz laughed, slinging an arm around Impulse’s shoulder as well. “She went up to the DJ and was all, ‘I’d like to be able to hear myself speak, please,’ and gave him one of her glares, and that guy absolutely crumbled. I didn’t even have to say a word; it was all her.”

“Yeah, yeah, I’m great and all that.” Gem giggled, readjusting her posture slightly. “Anyway, look at our outfits!” She squeezed Pearl’s waist, bringing her closer. “Aren’t we cute?”

Impulse nodded eagerly. Gem was wearing a flowy olive green dress, made of a fabric Impulse guessed was velvet or suede. He didn’t know the slightest thing about fabrics. A flower crown sat atop her head, white florets woven in with red and contrasting nicely with the mass of copper curls that flowed from her head. Pearl was wearing an identical crown, but a silky navy dress that hugged her body a bit tighter. Her brown hair was tied into a loose bun, with a few strands hanging over her face.

“You guys look great!” Impulse said, giving them a thumbs up. “Your matching flower crowns are cute.”

“Thanks, Impy!” Gem smiled, looking up at Pearl with a loving stare.

Pearl looked back with an equally adoring gaze, pressing a gentle peck to the bridge of Gem’s nose before turning back to Impulse and Skizz. “You guys look amazing, too! I love the matching corsage thing you have going on!”

“Those are actually boutonnieres, Pearl,” Skizz said smugly. “Get it right, mmguh?”

“Whatever.” Pearl scoffed and waved him away.

“What’s happening over here?” Grian jumped between the four of them with a cackle, wings smacking Skizz and Gem in the face and ribs, respectively.

Gem made a disgusted noise, hitting him away with her shoulder bag. Grian laughed even harder as Gem crossed her arms, tapping her foot impatiently as she glared at him. “Excuse me, sir.” She narrowed her eyes. “Are you gonna apologise?”

“Nah,” Grian snickered. 

Gem threw her hands in the air and huffed, provoking a laugh from Skizz and a satisfied smile from Grian.

“Well hello there!” Scar sang, rolling in with a positive energy that Impulse still failed to grasp. Despite the wheelchair only being needed some days, Impulse still didn’t understand how Scar maintained such an upbeat attitude, given that he would lose his ability to walk within the next year. Scar truly was to be admired.

“Hi, Scar!” Gem beamed, waving excitedly.

“How are ya, mate?” Pearl grinned down at him.

“Good, I’m good.” Scar smiled cheekily. “I tell ya, when you’re on wheels, people really do step aside for you. Most of them, at least.”

Skizz let out an awkward laugh, almost like he couldn’t believe Scar had just said that. Impulse let himself laugh fully, knowing that Scar meant to make everyone else uncomfortable. It had become a more regular occurrence now that he was in the chair half the time.

“Anyway…” Grian deftly changed the subject, shooting Scar a knowing look. “We came over here to force you guys to dance!”

“Yeah! Grian’s been helping me pop some wheelies!” Scar spun around quickly with a gleeful smile. “This thing has got moves, I tell ya.”

“Niceeee,” Skizz drawled. Turning to look at Impulse, Skizz stared at him intently, scrutinising his every behaviour. Impulse could tell that Skizz was recognising his anxiety at the loud room, the uncomfortable outfit, and the warmth that just kept increasing and increasing. Impulse wasn’t feeling too bad, but any longer in here and he knew the feeling would start to overwhelm him.

Without saying a word, Skizz gave Impulse a slight nod and turned to Grian. “Thanks for the offer, G, but I think Impy and I are gonna get some air. It’s incredibly stuffy in here.” Skizz tugged on his shirt for effect.

Impulse had never loved him more.

“Yeah… air….” Grian stared at them, eyebrow raised. 

“Whatever,” Skizz laughed. He jumped to his feet, holding out his hand to Impulse. He took it gratefully, waving bye to the others before letting Skizz lead him through the crowd. Bodies brushed against his, with far too many teenagers being crowded into this space for his liking. Skizz continued to pull him along, occasionally looking back with a small smile on his face, until they eventually neared the door.

Skizz pushed it open, guiding Impulse through and out into a small garden area. Vines climbed the walls, small weeds sprouted beneath cracks of concrete, and variations of flowers neatly lined the base of the wall. The sun was slowly vanishing behind the horizon, an orange and red glow painting the sky in a brilliant gradient. The once-overwhelming chatter was a dull hum in Impulse’s ears, with the crisp breeze and the trickling water from a nearby river becoming more coherent as Impulse adjusted to the new, gentle volumes.

It was perfect.

An arm slid around Impulse’s waist, pulling him close as soft kisses were peppered on the side of his face. “You okay, Dimpers?” Skizz whispered, hot breath tickling his ear.

“Yeah. Just loud and hot in there. It’s much nicer out here.”

“That I can agree with.”

Silence fell between them again, not one of discomfort or desperation to fill the quiet with some incoherent babbling, but one of bliss. Despite only being together for about two months now, they had already talked about anything that could be said in a silence like this. And Impulse had no problem with simply being here, with his favorite person, watching the sun sink into nothingness. It was enough for him.

“Hey, Impulse?”

“Yeah, Skizz?”

“I love you.” Skizz lifted a hand to Impulse’s chin, shifting his face upwards so they could look at each other properly. “I’m really glad that you came tonight. It wouldn’t be the same without you.”

Impulse felt his face melt into a smile as Skizz continued to stare at him with blue eyes full of love. He raised his arms, wrapping them around the back of Skizz’s neck, and pulled him down for a kiss. “For what it’s worth,” he murmured against Skizz’s lips, “my whole life wouldn’t be the same without you.”

He felt Skizz laugh into the kiss, but continue to hold him close and kiss him just as gently as he had before. Impulse wasn’t sure how much time passed as they continued to kiss each other, the dusk glow fading into shades of purple. Everything else faded into the background, Skizz being the only thing he wanted to acknowledge.

That was until Impulse heard that awfully familiar drum fill, followed by a bassline that made his heart soar immediately. Pulling back, Impulse saw the same realization dawn on Skizz’s face, an elated smile overcoming him.

“Is that—” Skizz started.

“Just Like Heaven?” Impulse finished.

“Boys, get in here!” Impulse looked towards the doorway to see Gem standing in it, looking at them with an expectant smile. “It’s your song!”

Impulse grabbed Skizz by the hand, dragging him through the door hastily. He continued to pull Skizz along until they made it to the dancefloor, where they were met with the excited faces of Pearl, Grian, Jimmy, and Tango. “Hey, guys!” Impulse grinned.

“Nice of you to join us,” Tango said cheekily.

“Yeah, you get some good air out there?” Grian added with a wink.

“Always!” Skizz answered quickly, wrapping his arm around Impulse’s waist and pulling him into his side.

Impulse let out a small chuckle at the knowing looks on everyone’s faces. They weren’t being sly in the slightest—everyone knew exactly what had happened outside. 

“Are you guys gonna dance, or what?!” Gem teased, grabbing Pearl’s hand and attempting to twirl her around with little success, given their height difference.

Impulse laughed, turning towards Skizz and holding out his hand expectantly. “You gonna twirl me, or am I twirling you?”

“Course I’ll twirl you, Dimpy Dop!” Skizz grabbed his hand and spun Impulse quickly, letting out a laugh as Impulse almost got caught on his own tail. Skizz continued to spin him, only pulling him in once Impulse was properly disoriented and giggling madly. 

Impulse quickly righted himself, guiding Skizz until they were dancing with some level of coordination. Music continued to fill the space as they danced together, laughter intermingled with their friends talking. The beautiful instrumentals of Just Like Heaven also helped to distract Impulse from the fact that neither of them were very good at dancing. It didn’t matter anyway. They were together, they were happy, and they were surrounded by their friends. What else did they need?

The songs began to flow into each other, and before Impulse knew it, it had been nearly twenty minutes of them aimlessly twirling each other around on the dance floor. And to his surprise, he was actually having fun. He couldn’t even remember the last time his feet felt cramped.

Maybe prom wasn’t so bad after all.

The crowd of teenagers quietened down suddenly, the noisy chattering reduced to a dull hum interspersed with the occasional laugh. Turning to the stage, Impulse saw their principal walking onto the stage, dark brown wings spread out behind her as she looked out amongst the sea of students. Clearing her throat, she tapped the microphone before speaking. “Hello to you all, I hope you’ve been having a good prom so far!”

Skizz cheered wildly, followed by the rest of their group and eventually the rest of their class as well.

“Good, good.” She smiled brightly and cleared her throat again. “I won’t keep you all for long, since I know you’ll want to get back to the last hour of your prom, but first,” she paused for dramatic effect, letting the suspense hold for a few seconds before resuming. “It is my pleasure to announce your prom king and queen for this year!”

Everyone dissolved into cheering again, with more hollering this time than actual applause.

“I bet it’s Joel and Lizzie,” Skizz murmured, nudging Impulse’s arm.

Impulse nodded in agreement. “Oh, for sure. Surely no one is gonna beat out the couple that’s been together since middle school, right?”

“You guys totally could,” Gem cut in with a mischievous smile. “People all over were rooting for you two.”

“Oh, stop it.” Skizz waved her away.

“It’s true! Ask anyone!” Gem said enthusiastically.

“Aren’t Joel and Lizzie your best friends?” Impulse asked confusedly. “You would’ve voted for them, right?”

Gem shrugged and laughed. “Who I voted for is none of your business.”

Impulse just stared, unsure whether she was being serious or not. 

“Drum roll, please!” The principal announced before being promptly cut off by students drumming on their legs and various other surfaces. “Your prom king and queen are…” She unfolded the paper and smiled out at everyone. “Joel Beans and Lizzie Shadow!”

Applause filled the space instantly, continuing to amplify as Joel and Lizzie walked on stage, hand in hand and grinning excitedly as the crowns were placed on their heads.

“Dangit!” Gem exclaimed, a dejected look on her face as she clapped.

“Wha- those are your friends, Gem!” Skizz said, clearly aghast.

“Yeah, but I wanted you two to win.” She pouted. “I got all my friends to vote for you and everything. I guess everyone else just hates gay people.”

“Aw, Gem, you didn’t have to do that,” Impulse said, feeling his heart warming. 

“Yeah! Impulse and I don’t need to win, we’re happy to watch!” Skizz added.

“Honestly, I’m glad we didn’t win.” Impulse looked between them hesitantly. “Not sure I want to be on stage like that in front of everyone. Too stressful.”

Gem sighed, gave them one last sad stare, and walked away. “At least I tried,” Impulse heard her murmur.

“Huh… didn’t realise people cared about us that much,” Skizz said, visibly confused and also looking slightly awe-struck.

“Neither.” Impulse agreed, looking at Skizz and feeling equally confused. It was nice to know that their relationship was seemingly so adorable that it was prom king and queen worthy, but Impulse had never really viewed it that way. He was just happy to be with Skizz; he didn’t need the notoriety of winning prom king to feel better about them. Just being with Skizz had always been enough. What more could he really ask for than being with the only boy who had ever made him feel safe? No crown could ever quantify how much he appreciated that. And he wanted Skizz to know that.

“For the record, Skizz.” Impulse locked eyes with him intently. “I didn’t need that stupid crown anyway. Having you is enough.”

“Ew, so corny,” Skizz teased, sticking his tongue out.

Impulse facepalmed, still not believing that this inside joke was still ongoing. Although it wasn’t that surprising, considering that he was dating Skizz. “I try to say one nice thing, and you throw that back in my face. Unbelievable.” He stared at Skizz with pretend frustration that instantly dissolved once arms were wrapped around his upper back and his face was pressed into Skizz’s chest.

Skizz laughed against Impulse’s hair, stroking the back of Impulse’s head gently. “I love you, Impy. And I feel the same.”

“I love you too. And you’d better.”

Skizz laughed again, squeezing him even tighter. Impulse let himself melt into it, feeling warm and safe and unbelievably happy. Sometimes, he still couldn’t believe how lucky he was. At some points in his life, he didn’t even think he would make it to senior year, and here he was, at prom with the boy he loved and surrounded by friends who loved him just as much. 

He really couldn’t believe this was his life.

“You wanna keep dancing, Impy?” Skizz asked eventually, kissing his hair gently.

“Yeah, I do.” Impulse grinned and took Skizz by the hand, leading him to the dancefloor. With only a little while left of their prom, Impulse wanted to make the most of it. He didn’t want to waste another second of his life.

He’s just grateful Skizz appeared just in time to show him that.

Chapter Text

Impulse shifted uncomfortably in his seat, feeling utterly drowned in his graduation robes. Seriously, who decided to make these things so flowy? He was certain he was going to fall. Or at least trip. And neither option sounded particularly nice, considering everyone and their parents were seated and staring intently at the stage, which some of his peers were beginning to walk across with beaming smiles as they received their diplomas.

Impulse really couldn’t care less about this entire procession. He received his academic achievement certificates ahead of time—he claimed a very impressive first place in computer science and second place in calculus—and honestly just wanted to get his diploma and leave. Although it was nice to see Mumbo get valedictorian and Gem get salutatorian, neither of them seemed very keen on giving their speeches. He couldn’t say he blamed them; just because they worked hard, and it paid off, didn’t mean they should have to talk about their accomplishments in front of their whole cohort. Lizzie’s class president speech was much less awkward, but it was right after the very long speech given by their principal, and Impulse didn’t pay her speech the attention it deserved.

Regardless, Impulse was proud of all of them. He was also getting very bored since he had already sat through about five speeches and half his year group walking across the stage. He mustered the energy to clap and cheer for Skizz and all of his other friends who had been across so far, but now he was waiting for his turn.

Students began to rise around him, and Impulse quickly jumped to his feet and followed the conga line of teenagers until he was waiting at the bottom of the steps. He wished he felt more anticipation, more excited about closing this chapter of his life, but after a week of exams and a two-hour ceremony, he was ready to take off on his forest getaway.

“Impulse Silva-Valderaz!” The vaguely familiar music teacher turned diploma announcer smiled and beckoned him towards her.

Impulse hesitantly walked across the stage, trying to ignore the feeling of hundreds of eyes boring into his skull. At least they changed the name on his diploma from his legal name; he really didn’t need to be jumpscared with his legal name while walking across the stage.

He took the diploma with a friendly smile and shook her hand, before promptly walking off the stage.

“That’s my boy!” A familiar voice cheered before letting out a sharp wolf whistle.

Impulse didn’t have to look up to know that it was Skizz. Honestly, he didn’t want to go through the awkward process of dead-eyeing the crowd while trying to spot Skizz. Despite mostly besting his anxiety in the past few months, he still wasn’t confident enough to look into the crowd. Maybe he never would be. That was fine with him. For now, he just smiled to himself as he weaved between the rows of chairs.

Sitting back in his seat, Impulse breathed a sigh of relief as he realised the hard part was over. Now he just had to sit through the last ten minutes of students receiving their diplomas, two more speeches, and then he could go find Skizz. Everything would be fine. He never had to think about high school ever again. He had done it.

… 

The second the applause ceased, Impulse was up and off, weaving between the crowd of crying and reminiscing students with practiced skill. He only had one goal in mind: find Skizz and get out of here as quickly as possible. And say goodbye to his parents before he and Skizz and the rest of their friends took off on their end-of-school camping trip.

Walking briskly, Impulse felt a smile spread across his face as his parents appeared before him, clapping excitedly and grinning as he walked over. “Hey,” he said, wrapping his arms around both of them.

“Hi, sweetie.” His mom quickly kissed his cheek, then pulled back and smiled at him with watery brown eyes. “We’re so proud of you.”

“Si! What your mother said!” His dad grinned, his eyes crinkling with glee as he wrapped an arm around his wife.

“Thanks, guys.” Impulse felt himself beginning to blush, despite all the compliments coming from his parents. He really had to get better at receiving praise.

An arm landing on his shoulders briefly startled him, but then a kiss was pressed into his hair, and Impulse felt his entire body go slack. Leaning into Skizz’s side, he instantly felt at peace. “Hey, Skizz,” Impulse twisted his head to smile up at him.

“Hey, Dimpers!” Skizz grinned widely before turning to Impulse’s parents. “Hi, Angel, hi, Erin. How are you guys?”

“Good, honey, thank you!” Impulse’s mom smiled warmly. “How have you been?”

“I’ve been doing well, thanks,” Skizz said cheerily.

“Are you boys excited for your- what is it? Galamping?” His dad added with a wink. “I know this one is.” He gestured to Impulse with a cheeky smile. “He has been talking all about it for the past week!”

Impulse crossed his arms. “It’s glamping, Papá.”

Skizz laughed and nudged Impulse playfully. “Trust me, I’ve been hearing about it too.” 

Impulse rolled his eyes playfully, letting out a scoff. “I haven’t been talking about it thaaaat much…”

“You have.” Skizz chuckled. “But it makes sense; I’m just as excited as you are.”

Impulse just smiled and elbowed Skizz’s ribcage gently. Skizz gave him a quick, playful glare before turning back towards Impulse’s parents, who were starting to bombard both of them with questions. Luckily, Skizz deftly answered all of them, making Impulse’s parents nod approvingly. Impulse knew it was all just for show; they had agreed to let him go camping the second he’d asked. He’s fairly sure they’re just glad he’s going out and doing things.

His communicator buzzed in his pocket, low and insistent. Pulling it out, Impulse flipped it open and thumbed through until he found his recent messages. There were a few fresh messages from his and Skizz’s group chat with Grian, Gem, and Scar, and the notifications were flowing through by the second.

Grian: guys what doing

Grian: i wanna go

Gem: have some patience, sir. i’m talking to my parents

Grian: but caaaaamping

Gem: god we will go in a minute

Scar: Can someone tell me where Skizzlys car is? My parents want to make sure its safe

Grian: yeah i can show you once everyone else is finally ready

Gem: ok grian i’m done now 

Grian: good 

Grian: let’s go

Impulse smiled at all the messages. He nudged Skizz gently, feeling bad about drawing him out of conversation with Impulse’s parents. “I think the others want to get out of here, Skizz.”

Skizz gave the messages a quick glance and let out a laugh. Turning back to Impulse’s parents, he smiled at them warmly. “I think our friends want to leave now,” He briefly moved away from Impulse to give both of them a hug. “Lovely to see you both, as per usual.”

“Yes, of course.” Impulse’s mom smiled before turning to Impulse. Her tail lashed slightly, and she eyed him nervously. “Please be careful, honey. We’ll see you Tuesday afternoon, right?”

“Yep! Only four and a half days, Mom.”

“I know, I know.” Her smile became less worried and more teasing. “Just because you’re all grown up doesn’t mean I can’t fuss over you anymore.”

Impulse laughed and pulled her in for another hug. “I know, I know. Love you.”

“I love you too, sweetie.”

Impulse pulled back to wave goodbye to both of his parents as Skizz started to pull him away. 

“Bye niño! Be safe!” His dad blew him a kiss.

Impulse grinned and blew a kiss back before turning around and following Skizz to his car. He held Skizz’s hand tightly, letting himself be dragged through the crowd of thrilled students and teary-eyed parents. The noise eventually tapered off as they approached Skizz’s car, both of them met with a smiling Scar and his cane, an antsy Grian, and an unimpressed Gem.

“Took you long enough,” Gem said, crossing her arms and leveling them with her sharp gaze.

“Sorry! My parents were yappin’!” Impulse smiled at all three of them. “Anyways, hi! Are you guys excited!”

Scar grinned from ear to ear. “Yes! I’m just glad my medication is working. Really didn’t wanna be on wheels for this trip.”

“That’s great, Scar.” Skizz reached out to put a hand on Scar’s back. “Can I help you into the car?”

“Why, thank you, Skizzy Wizzy.” 

Impulse stared between Gem and Grian, narrowing his eyes playfully. “Dibs not the middle!”

“Dibs not!” Gem chimed in quickly.

“Dibs not- shit!” Grian threw his hands in the air in a huff and stormed over to the door. He wrenched it open, dramatically throwing himself into the middle seat while mumbling every insult he could think of.

Impulse just nudged Gem and chuckled. “He’s feeling dramatic today.”

“Isn’t he always?”

“True.”

Impulse walked over to the driver’s side, catching Skizz just as he was about to get into the car. Skizz smiled lovingly as Impulse slid his hands up his neck and looked intently into Skizz’s piercing blue eyes. “You okay to drive? It’s already been a long day, and the campsite is about three hours away.”

Skizz let out a surprised laugh. “I’ll be fine, Dimpers. Besides, worst comes to worst, I’ll make Gem drive this monster truck.” He snickered.

Impulse laughed. “Oh, she totally would. Just to show you up, too.” 

“Maybe I should tease her, tell her she would never be able to drive this thing.” Skizz leaned down slightly and pressed a kiss to Impulse’s forehead. “She would totally get all stubborn and take over. Then we could cuddle in the backseat.” His lips were warm against Impulse’s forehead, his smile prominent in the way his lips rested against Impulse’s skin.

Impulse snickered, pulling back and standing on his tiptoes to press a chaste kiss to Skizz’s lips. “I like the sound of that.”

“I’ll make sure to make it happen.” Skizz smiled fondly, making Impulse’s heart flutter.

The sound of hammering fists on glass snapped Impulse out of his stupor, and his gaze flicked to the side to see Grian staring at them, brows furrowed and impatience evident. “Stop making out and get in the car! I wanna go!”

His words were muffled in such a way that made Impulse start giggling, only spurred on by Grian’s frustrated glare behind the window. Quickly squeezing Skizz’s hand and giving him a loving smile, Impulse let go and complied with Grian’s request. He settled into the car, leaning against the window as the engine hummed to life and they started down the road, music blasting and excitement filling the air.

Impulse knew this was gonna be great. A camping trip with all his closest friends—and some new people; what else could he need?

…

Impulse was jerked into consciousness, his whole body practically leaping into the air as the car jolted violently.

“Sorry! Big pothole in my way!” Gem chirped.

Only then did Impulse realise he was pressed against a warm body, an arm slung around his shoulder, and a head atop his. Impulse sleepily leaned against Skizz, pressing himself into Skizz’s side and feeling warmth and happiness flood his senses. Skizz rubbed his hand up and down Impulse’s arm gently and pressed a kiss into his hair.

Impulse really thought Skizz was joking about making Gem drive. This truck was far too big for her to be driving. Although she was driving it like an absolute boss; Impulse watched as she deftly weaved through the foresty back roads like she had driven them every day. Even though she was sitting up completely straight and hunched over the steering wheel so she could see, she drove with so much confidence that Impulse felt completely safe as she navigated the woods. He really should’ve had more faith in her. She was absolutely killing it.

Impulse dropped his head back onto Skizz’s shoulder, switching between peaceful slumber and sluggish wariness for the rest of the drive. Animated chatter floated over his head, sometimes a dull hum and sometimes more animated, and sometimes even jerking Impulse awake. 

It was perfect. Impulse wouldn’t have it any other way.

He finally felt the car slow to a stop, tires crunching on gravel, and the conversation becoming louder, more excited. 

“Rise and shine, Impy.” Skizz kissed the top of his head. “We finally made it.”

Impulse blinked hard, light assaulting his eyeballs as he looked out the window. A vast, crystal clear lake filled his vision, stretching out towards a forested hill that spiked upwards into a mountain. Tall pine trees stuck out in the foreground of his vision, outlining a large, wooden cabin perched on the precipice of the lake. Figures were present in the distance, their laughter carried by the wind and filling Impulse’s ears as they all piled in the front door.

“Wow. So pretty.” Impulse stared, awestruck, at the sight before him. It filled him with such happiness that he couldn’t even fathom how he would articulate it. 

“Let’s go admire it properly then, yeah?” Skizz rubbed his hand along Impulse’s shoulder and towards the back of his neck.

Impulse turned around to look at Skizz, being met with an excited, warm smile and the faint yellow glow of Skizz’s halo. Impulse blushed at the sight. He knew he would never get over the fact that Skizz’s halo only made an appearance around him. It was more flattery than he knew how to handle. “Yeah, let’s go.” 

Impulse leaped out of the car, taking in the view properly and feeling his eyes begin to water as he watched Grian and Gem run to greet Jimmy, Lizzie, and Joel. He wasn’t sure why he was feeling so emotional—other than that collective effervescence thing Grian taught him about. Maybe it was the view. Or maybe it was being surrounded with so much love that Impulse didn’t quite know what to do with himself.

Whatever it was, Impulse wasn’t about to deny the feeling.

Feeling Skizz’s hand slip into his, Impulse smiled up at him briefly before walking towards the house. Entering through the front door, Impulse was immediately met with a cozy but open living room currently filled with chatty teenagers.

“Impulse! Skizz! Hey, my dudes!” Ren jogged over to give them both a warm hug.

“Hey, Ren! How are you, brother?” Skizz clapped him on the back enthusiastically. 

“I’m good, dude. I’m good.”

“Aye-up!” Martyn chimed in, strolling over and dropping his chin onto Ren’s shoulder. “How are you guys?”

“We’re good, dude, thanks!” Impulse smiled and lightly punched Martyn on the shoulder. “How about you two?” He winked suggestively.

Martyn shot Ren a cheeky but loving smile. “We’re good. Taking it slowly, but good.”

“I’m glad, dude.” Impulse nodded his head happily. He was glad those two had gotten back together; ever since Martyn told him about his history with Ren, Impulse had known that they would end up back together. He was glad they had.

“Impy!” 

He turned around to see Pearl waving him over excitedly, arms extended. He ran over and hugged her quickly, giving her friends an awkward smile. “Hey, Pearl!”

“Hello!” She smiled down at him. “How are ya, mate? Was the drive okay?”

“Yeah, it was good. I slept for most of it if I’m being honest. You?”

“Mine was about the same, honestly. I think everyone was tired from graduation.” Pearl turned slightly and gestured for her friends to come forward before turning back to Impulse. “I think you’ve met these guys before, right?”

Impulse looked at all three of them for a couple of moments before realisation dawned on him. “Yeah, I have! On Halloween, right?” Impulse furrowed his brows and racked his brain for names. “Scott?” He hesitantly pointed to a tall-ish boy with blue hair and a friendly smile.

“That’s me!” Scott smiled and waved.

Impulse grinned and looked at the other two for a few more moments before their names sprang to the forefront of his mind. “Cleo?” He nodded to a person with fiery red hair who was a similar height to Scott. They grinned and nodded, giving him a small wave. “And then BigB, right?” Impulse looked over at a much taller boy with dark skin and even darker coily hair.

“You got it!” BigB grinned, eyes crinkling in such a friendly way that Impulse immediately felt at ease.

“Awesome! It’s nice seeing you guys again.” Impulse wiggled his eyebrows slightly. “How are we feeling about graduating? Never going back and all that.”

“Honestly, I’m not gonna miss it,” Clet let out a wry laugh. “It was just so boring, I’ll be fine with never experiencing all of that ever again. We’ll be way more free in college anyway.”

“Yep, same here,” Scott added. “Made good friends, mostly had fun, but I’m ready to move on.”

Impulse nodded eagerly, feeling his own thoughts finally articulated in a way that he couldn’t manage himself. He’d enjoyed his high school experience—even if it was only enjoyable in the last six months—but he felt like he couldn’t get anything else out of it. He’d gained incredible friends, an amazing, perfect boyfriend, and more confidence than he ever thought he could attain. It wasn’t possible to get anything else from high school; he had reached his limit. And he was content with that.

Impulse felt Skizz’s chin land on the top of his head, and an arm snake around his middle. He leaned back against Skizz, readjusting slightly so his head was nestled into the crook of Skizz’s neck. “Whatcha doing?” He asked playfully.

“Needed something to lean on.” Skizz snickered. “Hey, guys!”

“Hi, Skizzley!” Pearl chirped, shooting Impulse a not-so-subtle wink before smiling back at Skizz. “How have you been?”

“Good, good. I actually came over here to ask Big Bopper over here when he wants to start dinner. I know it’s early, but personally, I am starving, dude.” Skizz rubbed his stomach emphatically.

BigB chuckled, reaching out to pat Skizz’s shoulder. “We can start anytime, man! If we start cooking right now, it should be ready by about five, which I think is the right time for dinner. Especially because most of us didn’t really eat lunch.”

“Yeah, man!” Pearl whined playfully. “I’m hungry!”

Impulse felt Skizz’s body shake with mirth, accompanied by hearty laughter. 

“Okay, Pearl,” Skizz said. “We’ll get a move on. Come on, Bopper!” Skizz pressed a kiss to the top of Impulse’s head before walking away, closely followed by BigB.

“Thank you, Skizzley!” Pearl turned back to Impulse with a smile. “Wanna sit?” She gestured to the couch. “They’re probably gonna be a while.”

“Yeah, let’s chat some more!” Cleo grinned and plonked themselves down. “We can get to know each other a bit before we all split off!”

“Yeah, what else is this little trip for?” Scott added.

Impulse grinned and sat down next to them. He let the conversation fill his ears, piping in occasionally when they asked him a question. It was nice to talk to them like this, even if Impulse wasn’t sure that they would stay in touch over the summer. Just being around them was enough.

…

“Another turning point, a fork stuck in the road.” Ren strummed enthusiastically on his guitar to accompany his singing. “Time grabs you by the wrist, directs you where to go.”

“Whoo!” Martyn cheered, pressing a kiss to Ren’s cheek.

“So make the best—” Ren let out a flustered laugh. “—Of this test and don’t ask why.”

“It’s something unpredictable!” Skizz yelled, squeezing Impulse’s shoulder and giving him a happy smile.

“But in the end it’s right!” Impulse added on with a fond laugh.

“I hope you had the time of your life!” Everyone else chimed in, their voices blending unharmoniously, but still full of joy.

Impulse laughed as Ren fumbled a note from everyone’s outburst, before continuing to sing and play as though nothing happened. Impulse looked around at everyone huddled together, some with blankets cast over them despite the fire still going strong. Pebbles crunched beneath their feet as they shifted around, intermingling with Ren’s singing and the gentle evening breeze. The sun slowly sank into the horizon, filling the sky with a stunning display of oranges, reds, and a slight purple hue brought about by the appearance of the moon. The tall pine trees stuck out against the sky, almost like a shadow looming over them.

It was beautiful. Impulse had never been to this spot before, despite it only being a couple of hours away. He knew he would be coming back here as soon as possible.

“It’s something unpredictable!” Skizz sang again.

“But in the end it’s right!” Everyone else added.

“I hope you had the time of your life!” Ren dramatically strummed the guitar to finish the song, then stood up and gave a small bow.

“Yeah, Ren!” Pearl clapped and wolf whistled.

The applause multiplied in an instant, accompanied by cheering and shouting that made Ren go bright red and sit back down. “Oh, stop it,” he said.

“Never!” Martyn laughed and slung his arm around Ren’s shoulders.

Ren sighed fondly and leaned into Martyn’s side as he looked out at the group expectantly. “Any other song requests? Anyone?”

“I kinda wanna go for a swim,” Lizzie mused.

Ren looked at her confusedly. “What song is that?” 

“No, no, I want to go for a swim.” Lizzie pointed at the lake emphatically before looking around at everyone. “It was like seventy-five degrees today, surely the water is warm?”

“Only one way to find out!” Martyn jumped to his feet and bounded towards the water, ripping his shirt off in the process.

“Wha- Martyn!” Ren yelled, getting up and following him in.

Impulse watched as Cleo and Pearl looked at each other, shared a smirk, and leapt to their feet. They bounded down to the water, haphazardly chucking their shirts to the side before they dove in, headfirst. Cleo let out a squeal as they emerged before waving at everyone still on the shore. 

“Get in here! It feels great!”

Lizzie jumped up, holding out her hand to Joel expectantly. He grabbed it with a small grumble and let out a shout as she pulled both of them into the lake. Gem was quick to follow, giving Grian a firm look from the shore, which coaxed him in almost immediately. Scott dove in, and BigB let out a scream as Cleo tackled him into the water despite him barely having gotten his feet wet.

“Come on, Tango!” Jimmy pleaded, trying to drag Tango to his feet.

“No!” Tango crossed his arms and shook his head. “I don’t wanna go bald in front of all these people! So embarrassing!”

“I’ll go with you, Jimmy!” Bdubs said quickly, before Jimmy even had time to sit back down. 

Jimmy smiled and gave Bdubs a quick side-hug. “Thanks, dude!”

“No problem.” He winked at Jimmy. “I’ll race ya!” He said, taking off within the same instant.

“Hey! Not fair!”

Impulse laughed before turning to look at Skizz expectantly. “So…”

“Come on, man!” Skizz sighed. “You know I hate cold water! And my wings, dude,” he gestured to them dramatically, “I just preened them!”

“I’ll preen them for you after!” Impulse countered, getting to his feet and putting on his best pleading look. “Pleaseeeee?”

Skizz’s face turned light pink, and a smile tugged at the corners of his mouth. “Fine! But I know it’s only because you wanna see me shirtless.” He nudged Impulse playfully.

Impulse nudged him back. “Nothing I haven’t seen before.”

“Come on, dude!” Etho groaned, appearing behind them. “I’m right here!”

“Are you coming in, Etho?!” Skizz clapped excitedly.

“Only cause it’ll annoy Tango,” he snickered.

“Good idea!” Impulse laughed, pulling his shirt off and dipping a toe in the water. It was cool, but not cold—more pleasantly refreshing, given that it wasn’t that warm outside currently. He waded in up to his waist before turning around and looking at Skizz and Etho expectantly. “You guys coming in or what?”

Skizz sighed, took his shirt off, and hesitantly walked into the water. He started flailing almost instantly, waving his arms about and shrieking like a banshee. “This water sucks!” He yelled, launching himself forward in a desperate attempt to get to Impulse.

Impulse giggled as Skizz tumbled into his arms, holding on tightly while shivering maniacally. “Didn’t know your voice could get to that octave, Skizz.”

“Shut up! It’s cold!”

“It’s not that bad,” Etho chuckled, appearing next to them.

“You have Canadian blood. Doesn’t count,” Skizz retorted, splashing Etho while keeping his arm firmly tucked around Impulse’s waist.

Impulse zoned out Skizz and Etho’s bickering in favor of looking out at everyone else playing in the water. Martyn and Ren had swum out about seventy feet and were just lying there, staring at the sky. Jimmy and Bdubs were tackling each other into the lake and hollering playfully. Gem and Pearl were twirling each other around. Scott, Cleo, BigB, Lizzie, and Grian were all swerving around Joel, who was intermittently shouting “Marco!” 

Looking back at the shore, Impulse saw Mumbo and Scar curled up next to each other by the fire, a blanket thrown over their legs. Mumbo stood up, grabbed his camera, and started snapping photos of everyone. 

Unsurprising. Someone had to take the photos, and Mumbo was always up to the task.

Looking past Mumbo, Impulse watched as Tango visibly grumbled, screwing his face up before ripping his shirt off and sprinting down to the water and practically cannonballing into it. Jimmy and Bdubs jumped back as they were showered with water, before immediately clapping Tango on the back. Jimmy quickly pressed a kiss to his cheek before pulling him completely underwater while Tango flailed and squawked.

“Heyy!!” Skizz called with a big smile. “He made it in!”

“So much cold!” Tango shouted back before being pushed into the water again by Bdubs. He resurfaced with a grumble, patting his head to find that he was utterly hairless. “Jerky!” He shouted, lunging at Bdubs.

Etho let out a defeated sigh. “I’m gonna go break that up real quick.”

“Have fun!” Impulse snickered as Etho frustratedly waded away.

As soon as Etho was over by Bdubs and Tango, Skizz spun Impulse around so they were facing each other. “Hey, Dimpers,” he whispered, wrapping his arms around Impulse’s waist and pulling him in.

“Hey,” Impulse whispered back, winding his arms around Skizz’s neck.

“I’m really happy to be here with you.” Skizz pressed a kiss to his forehead. “Wouldn’t wanna be with anyone else but you.” He pressed another kiss to Impulse’s horn.

“Ditto, Skizz.” Impulse leaned his face into Skizz’s neck and sighed happily. He didn’t have the words to describe how perfect his life felt right now. But he knew he didn’t need them. Skizz understood him just fine. 

Impulse stayed that way for as long as he could, until he felt the ground drop from underneath his feet as his legs were swept away. He went crashing backwards, falling into the water with a splash. As he thrashed his way to the surface, he heard the signature sound of Skizz’s giggling. Skizz smiled down at him as he blinked the water from his eyes and put his hands on his hips. “What was that for, huh?”

“Couldn’t help myself.”

Impulse wasted no time tackling Skizz into the water, delighting in the sound of Skizz’s shriek. 

“You suck!” Skizz blubbered, spitting water from his mouth as he stared at Impulse playfully.

“You did it first!”

Skizz looked like he was about to tackle him again, but was quickly stopped by Grian shouting for their attention.

“Guys, guys, guys!” He waved them over. “Come here, I’ve got an idea!”

Impulse laughed. Grian always had some big idea whenever everyone was together as a group. He grabbed Skizz by the hand and tugged him over, where everyone was beginning to gather.

“Okay, okay.” Grian looked at everyone excitedly. “How do we feel about playing sardines in that big old house over there?”

“Yes, yes!” Gem replied, clapping gleefully.

“What’s sardines?” Skizz asked, leaning his head against Impulse’s.

“Reverse hide and seek. One person hides, we all go looking, but when you find them, you join them.” Grian smiled cheekily. “It’s not complicated, I promise. But we have to play this; look at how huge that cabin is! It would be sacrilege not to.”

“Can we lie down first?” Ren asked, gesturing to the sky. “We’ve been out here for so long, the stars have come out. We gotta do some stargazing, my dudes!”

“Come on then,” Grian said. “We can dry off for a bit and then play.”

Everyone started making their way back to the shore, teeth chattering and bodies shivering as they acclimatised to the now cold night air. Impulse flopped onto the blanket they had left behind and waited for Skizz to sit down next to him before wrapping it around both of them. Lying on his back, Impulse nestled himself into the crook of Skizz’s neck and wrapped his arms around Skizz’s body with a contented sigh.

He looked up at the stars, all of them blinking comfortingly down at him against the black canvas of the night sky. A gentle breeze grazed his skin as he stared, awestruck at the beauty of it all. While their hometown wasn’t that big, it had enough light pollution from the main city that it was impossible to see the stars this brightly. But out here, with the nearest town being a thirty-minute drive away, everything was clearer, the stars shining the way they should be.

It really was perfect.

With the stars glowing positively, Impulse found himself with a new sense of hope. He’d never imagined that his life would be the way it was now. He always thought he would fade into obscurity, working a dreary job and surrounded by nothing that filled him with genuine happiness. But, after the best year of his life and now having more love in his life than he ever thought possible, he had hope. Hope that his life would turn out the way he wanted it to, even though he never dared to dream it would. But now he knew good things were coming his way. He’d had the best year of his life, and it would only go up from here.

“Whatcha thinking about, Dippledop?” Skizz pressed a kiss to his hair.

How could Impulse respond to that? He was thinking about everything. Everything he had ever been, everything he could be. And deep down, he knew there was one reason for all of this hope, that these dreams would be coming true. “You, Skizz.” He replied, twisting his head around. “I’m thinking about you.”

“Oh, stop it,” Skizz laughed. 

“It’s true, Skizz.” Impulse sat up so he was leaning over Skizz. “I wouldn’t be here without you, in more ways than one. You saved my life. So yeah, we have all these beautiful stars in front of us, and a whole life to live, but I’m still thinking about you. Always will be.”

Skizz stared, astonished. His halo began to glow above his head, golden and bright and blocking out the meager light that the stars were providing. “Really?” He murmured.

“Of course.”

Skizz breathed out a laugh. “I love you, Impulse.” He pressed a kiss to Impulse’s lips, slow and sweet, before pulling away. “I don’t know what I would do without you.”

“Neither do I.” Impulse laid back down, his head on Skizz’s chest, and relished in the gentle thrum of Skizz’s heartbeat. “One question, though.”

“Yeah?”

“How on earth did you go from calling me Impy to calling me Dippledop?”

Skizz let out a loud laugh, his body shaking with mirth. “I could explain it to you, but I have a feeling you don’t wanna hear all of it.”

“Yeah, I know all the nicknames you’ve given me. Just wondering how you’ve come up with so many.”

“It’s how I show my love!”

Impulse rolled his eyes and wrapped his arms around Skizz’s waist again.

 He still couldn’t believe how far he had come with Skizz. From being the boy Impulse once thought was weird for talking to him, to the boy he became hesitant friends with, then good friends. The boy whose touch he once recoiled from, but now leaned into without thinking, wanting the closeness without feeling even slightly uncomfortable. The boy who noticed everything about Impulse, and had committed his life to making sure Impulse felt seen and heard and appreciated. The boy who made him feel safe, who made him comfortable, who made him feel like he could do anything. The boy he loved. The boy he wanted, for as long as they were meant to have each other.

Looking at it like that, Impulse knew he was unbelievably lucky to have met one of the greatest people in the world at such a young age. And Impulse knew he wasn’t gonna let him go. 

“Is it sardines time yet?” Grian called over the crackle of the fire and the quiet chatter.

“I reckon,” Joel replied, and the sound of him getting to his feet filled the air. “Can I hide first?”

“Fine,” Grian grumbled. “You’ve got three minutes!”

“What?! The house is like two hundred feet away!”

“Better get moving then.”

“For goodness' sake,” Joel muttered as he began to run away, the gravel and sand crunching beneath his feet.

Impulse chuckled as the door of the house slammed dramatically, and everyone else started giggling.

“He’s gonna be in such an easy spot,” Lizzie remarked.

“Oh, one hundred percent,” Grian laughed.

“Have some faith in our boy! He’s got this!” Jimmy cut in.

“I hope you find him last, Tim.” Grian retorted.

“Hey, now.”

Impulse sat up, listening to Jimmy and Grian bicker while he looked at everyone spread out across the shore. Gem and Pearl were leaning against a wooden log, whispering to each other while they cuddled beneath a blanket. Scott, Cleo, and BigB were sitting in a circle, sharing a bag of candy. Tango and Jimmy were lying on their backs, with Jimmy’s wings spread across both of them while he continued to argue with Grian. Bdubs was backed up against a rock, with Etho’s head in his lap while he stroked his hair. Ren and Martyn were by the fire, with Martyn’s head on Ren’s shoulder. Scar and Mumbo were on each side of Grian, growing increasingly frustrated with Grian’s insistent yelling.

It was comforting, knowing that while everyone was going their separate ways in a few months, they still had this time together, enjoying the company and celebrating their escape from high school. Impulse thought he should be sad that this chapter of his life was coming to an end, but he was simply grateful that they had this time together.

“It’s time!” Grian shouted, leaping to his feet. “Everyone, up! Time to go find Joel!”

Impulse chuckled and stood up, holding out his hand to Skizz. “Come on, time to win this game.”

“So competitive,” Skizz snickered, grabbing his hand and jumping up.

“You’re used to it.”

“That I am.” Skizz interlocked his fingers with Impulse’s and pulled him towards the house.

Hand in hand with his boyfriend, Impulse felt an overwhelming sense of peace as laughter soon filled the house while everyone searched for Joel. He was done with high school forever, he was surrounded by the most amazing friends, and he was with the only boy he ever truly wanted.

Everything was as it should be. And Impulse couldn’t be more grateful.