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Mark knows he’s been dead for years. He remembers the moment it happened—an experiment gone wrong, the power overwhelming him until it ended, the way he had floated away into a gray ether that seemed to envelop him, keeping him somewhere for a while.
And then Joanie brought him back. Of course she did, she’s his big sister; she would never abandon him. His tether to the world is tenuous at best, but he’s here , which is the important part.
What he wants though, is for Joanie to join him. Sometimes, she gets on these pills, and then he fades again. His power to hold on weakens, and his hands go translucent, and he’s trapped in a white box that he can’t get out of. Mark hates those times. He likes it better when Joanie can see him, when he can wander around her apartment with her.
Then they can talk about her day, and she can chide him about leaving the dishes askew after dinner. Mark can ask about her latest patient, and Joanie can tell him about how much he would have hated to be around a weather manipulator.
The other thing Mark can’t stand? Joanie’s boyfriend. Owen never sees him; Mark knows that he should be able to, at some point, but Owen always ignores him, worrying about Joanie’s ability to work and communicate and live.
It’s his birthday. Owen comes over, because of course he does, he refuses to leave Joanie alone during an anniversary. The dinner itself is good; Mark keeps quiet, content to watch them banter back and forth and be unbelievably sweet with each other. He’s glad his sister found someone, of course, since a part of him worried that she would be too ambitious at work to have time for romance. His own feelings on Owen don’t really matter, since he’s not the one dating the guy.
So the night is going well. What Owen doesn’t know is that Joanie baked Mark a cake to celebrate. And unfortunately, that’s what sets Owen off.
“It’s someone’s birthday, so we must have cake!” Joan says excitedly, pulling out the little cake and lighting the two little candles on top. The fire draws Mark in, and Joanie’s eyes meet his to make sure he likes it.
Owen places a hand over hers. “Joan, I thought we talked about this. He’s been gone for years, so he doesn’t need a cake.” Joan falters, blinking up at Owen. He continues, “What happened to the new meds? I thought things were going well.”
Joan takes a long moment to stare at Mark, before closing her eyes tightly and shaking her head. Mark takes the hint and backs away, so that when she opens them again, he’s out of sight. She sighs and says dryly, “I have the happiest septic tank in the building.”
Mark had convinced her to throw out her latest pills, because she was complaining about how she couldn’t connect to her patients. How else was he supposed to react?
Owen groans in exasperation. “They were working, Joan!” He stands and reaches for his bag, grabbing a notebook out of it. “I guess we can go back to the doctors and try again.”
“No, they weren’t. I couldn’t feel anything, and I cannot be a good scientist if I can’t connect to the experiments.”
“That’s not…look, I know this is hard, okay?”
Joan snorts. “Do you know how hard it is, really? Because I don’t think you do. Do you wake up some mornings and have a hard time getting out of bed? It’s like living on a cliffside not knowing when you’ll dive. Do you read obituaries and feel jealous of the dead? I feel like I’m screaming, but I never make a sound. Do you know how hard it is to live like that?”
She’s moving around the kitchen, slamming the plates and dishes together as she shoves them into the sink. Owen puts his hands up placatingly.
“I…I’m sorry, Joan. Can you tell me what’s making you afraid enough to throw away your meds? Because I really hope it isn’t me. You know I’ll always be here to help you, to care about you.”
Mark slides back into focus, slipping behind Owen. He knows it’s true, that Owen does care about her, but he’s not the only one who does. On the way, he mimics blowing out his candles, reminding Joanie that she needs to take care of that.
Owen takes Joan’s hands in his, stilling them for a moment. But Joan has never been the most openly affectionate person, so she shrugs out of them and continues cleaning the counter aggressively, making sure to blow out the candles. She doesn’t respond to his questions.
“If our positions were switched…could you leave me?” Owen asks, and Mark can’t help but respond.
“Hey Owen,” he says in a sing-songy voice.
“Would you let me go under?” Owen continues.
“Come on man, why can’t you see me? I don’t think I’m that forgettable.” Mark notices Joanie’s eyes flitting back and forth between them, which is great. At least someone knows he’s there.
“I’m just trying to help, will you watch as I drown too? Are you bleeding?”
Mark interrupts with some questions of his own. “Are you waiting and wishing and wanting all that she can’t give you?”
“Are you bruised and broken? Does it help you to know that so am I? Watching you tear your life apart like this is painful for me too.”
Mark undercuts his words again. “Are you hurting and healing and hoping for a life to live? Because so am I.”
“Tell me what to do, Joan,” Owen begs.
“Look at me, and you’ll see,” Mark answers. Because that’s it, isn’t it? Owen needs to see him to be able to help Joanie. He’ll never understand her if he won’t see Mark.
Joan slumps into a kitchen stool, and Owen stands across the room from her. Mark takes the opportunity to step in front of his sister, making sure she knows that he’s there for her. Joan grabs his hand, squeezing it hard to ground herself.
Owen doesn’t seem to notice, and simply pleads with Joan. “I’m the one who holds you, so I want to help. I won’t walk away. I will hear you, just tell me what to do.”
Mark watches Owen get closer with every sentence, and moves just before the other man can touch him. “We don’t need him, Joanie. I can help you, you know that.”
Joan seems to break at those words. She stands and grabs her chair, swinging it at Mark. “I need you to leave me alone!” Mark jumps backward, out of reach. Then she swings it at Owen, who also backs up quickly. “You don’t know what it’s like for me! And you never will! I need to be alone.”
Mark’s heart breaks, and tears well up in his eyes. She doesn’t want him around? But she was looking for him when he got kidnapped; all she wanted was for him to be with her. And on his birthday, no less. But Mark can take a hint, so he heads to the spare room, certain his sister will change her mind soon enough.
He can hear Owen talking softly, trying to contain Joanie, but she’s sobbing and yelling still, and eventually, the door opens and closes with its normal bang.
And now it’s just the Bryants, once more. Mark’s never going away, of that he’s sure, so he just needs to get Joanie to find the world where they can be free together. They’ll get there someday.