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1. is this the real thing/is this just fantasy? by depraveddame

   Fandoms: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett  

   • Explicit
   • No Archive Warnings Apply
   • M/M
   • Complete Work

   19 Jun 2025

   Tags

   • No Archive Warnings Apply
   • Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)
   • Aziraphale (Good Omens)
   • Crowley (Good Omens)
   • Alternate Universe - Human
   • Alternate Universe - Roommates/Housemates
   • One Shot
   • Top Aziraphale/Bottom Crowley (Good Omens)
   • Real Dick versus Dildo Challenge
   • Ineffable Idiots (Good Omens)
   • Pining
   • Crowley Has a Penis (Good Omens)
   • Aziraphale Has a Penis (Good Omens)
   • Aziraphale Is Hung Like A Horse
   • Science Experiments
   • Dubious Science
   • to put it lightly lol
   • Author has not thought about the scientific method since high school please be kind
   • Crowley knows he wants to fuck Aziraphale but doesn't realise he's got FEELINGS
   • Porn with Feelings
   • Crack Treated Seriously
   • Sort of? I don't REALLY know what crack entails and at this point I'm afraid to ask
   • Emotional Sex
   • Doggy Style
   • Caring Aziraphale (Good Omens)
   • Very Light Dom/Sub Vibes
   • Crowley is a slut
   • Crowley Has a Crush on Aziraphale (Good Omens)
   • Aziraphale also has a crush on Crowley
   • Minor bit of anxiety with fear of abandonment that passes quickly
   • Touch-Starved Crowley (Good Omens)
   • Affection-Starved Crowley
   • Some kabeshiri/stuck in a hole/glory hole adjacent vibes as far as Aziraphale not being able to see Crowley from the waist up
   • mild objectification
   • Sweet/Hot
   • Happy Ending
   • Condoms
   • safe sex
   • Lube
   • praise and mild degradation
   • Floor Sex
   • POV Crowley (Good Omens)
   • Explicit Sexual Content
   • Cock Slapping
   • Like lots of it
   • especially over hole
   • Filthy
   • Dirty Talk
   • Aziraphale is "just enough of a bastard to be worth knowing" (Good Omens)
   • Teasing
   • Anal Sex
   • Friends to Lovers
   • Drinking & Talking
   • Sex Toys
   • Aziraphale wears glasses
   • Coming Untouched
   • Author is not sponsored by Solina or Vixskin
   • Inspection Kink
   • Begging
   • mild jealousy
   • mild possessiveness
   • Jealous Aziraphale (Good Omens)
   • Possessive Aziraphale (Good Omens)
   • but it really isn't intense
   • Crowley Cries During Sex (Good Omens)
   • Overwhelmed Crowley (Good Omens)
   • Aziraphale runs this experiment like it’s the Navy until he doesn’t
   • Crowley has bratty tendencies
   • Size Queen Crowley (Good Omens)
   • Paper Thin Rationale
   • Bottom Crowley (Good Omens)
   • Top Aziraphale (Good Omens)

   Summary

   During a dry spell, Crowley complains loudly and insistently to his flatmate (who he’s wanted to fuck as long as he's known him) about how a dildo is nowhere near as satisfying as the real thing, and Aziraphale proposes that they actually put Crowley's theory to the test.

   Just two flatmates conducting an experiment where they see if Crowley actually can tell the difference between a sex toy and Aziraphale's cock in the name of science, aka the Real Dick vs Dildo challenge, aka the one where affection starved Crowley has desires and feelings and would pretty much do anything to get Aziraphale inside him at least once.

   Part 3 of my Pride series!

   Series

   • Part 3 of Ineffable Pride Collection 🌈

   Language:

   English

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