Chapter Text
As he runs – desperate to escape despite the way the pain in his chest and in his heart threaten to slow him down – the last weeks play over Reki’s mind like a blurry, shaky movie.
It all began with the crawling, choking sense of inevitability; knowledge that he wouldn’t be able to stay by Langa’s side for much longer. Their friends now knowing what their relationship is truly like has begun to feel more and more like the beginning of the end. Reki’s been able to read it in their comments about how amazing Langa is, contrasted with how no one seems to know or care about who Reki is, or what he is to Langa. And yeah, it’s true that even Reki himself isn’t sure of that. But he should at least be acknowledged as Langa’s peer, as a fellow skater, as his friend, rather than…rather than…
A groupie.
That was when Reki’s spiral towards the bottom had truly started. Him wanting to prove, at least to himself, that he could also soar the same heights as Langa, just for a chance to be able to remain by his side for a bit longer. Failing to do so; failing to touch that star. His chest hurting, his balance off, the urge to breastfeed growing stronger by the minute. Feeling so rotten, walking home in the rain that seemed colder with every step taken despite the heat of summer. Finding Langa waiting for him near Reki’s house. Seeing him there hurt so much, physically and emotionally, like he was throwing everything inside Reki back at him by wanting to go up against Adam in a tournament. Because it’s exciting. Because Reki’s not enough to provide that kind of a challenge or thrill. He’s only been a milk supply for Langa to feed from to get better, get well again, get into shape again. Now that he is all those things, of course he would leave Reki and reach out for better, more challenging aspects of life. For everything he can have and deserves.
Reki’s ruined himself for him. Created this ache in his body that won’t go away. Has been made into a new, uglier, soiled version of himself to keep Langa close. And it still hadn’t been enough.
So Reki pushed him away before Langa could say it. That he didn’t need Reki anymore. That Adam was so much better than him. That Reki didn’t matter to him anymore.
Everything’s been a grey blur since then. The only thing Reki remembers clearly is the pain, both emotional and physical, caused by Langa’s absence. He misses Langa like a limb because despite everything…Reki can’t stop himself from still loving him. Wanting him around, in whatever way Langa would offer him. Even if it’d just make the pain worse, not fully being able to be with him…so long as Langa wouldn’t leave Reki behind, he’d accept whatever scraps he’d give him, as he has been doing for months. But it’s too late. There’s no going back now. Reki can’t fix what’s broken between them because he can’t fix himself. Can’t suddenly make himself worthy to be by Langa’s side. He proved it to himself that night with the star.
It doesn’t even matter that…for some reason, even without Langa needing his milk anymore, it keeps building up in Reki’s breasts, swelling them to the point of agony. Reki thought by separating himself from the Alpha, and Langa being clearly better now, the lactation would stop on its own. But if anything, it’s only gotten worse. Reki’s barely had the energy to try and pump it out, but even when he does try, it barely helps at all. And it only gets worse whenever he’s forced to be around Langa, like at school. Especially since Langa still tries to talk to him for whatever reason, tries to follow him whenever Reki rushes to pump during recess in whatever secret crevice he can find that Langa doesn’t yet know about. It’s gotten to the point that Reki’s started to avoid school whenever he can, even more than he did before. He just spends his days wandering around town until it’s time to go home, stopping by public bathrooms whenever he feels the urge to release his milk.
Reki knows he should probably really see the doctor about his condition now, to put a stop to all this. But every time he tries…something inside him always stops him from making that appointment. He’d like to just blame his lack of energy or cloudy head, but he knows deep down that’s not all of it. He just doesn’t dare to dwell or name the other reasons, even within his own mind.
But boy, is he wishing he had just gotten it over and done with now. Now, when his breasts jiggle, even within the confines of his bra, every running step such agony Reki can barely breathe. He really shouldn’t have come here, either – shouldn’t have come to Crazy Rock anymore, no matter what Joe said. He should’ve known it’d be far too much, far too complicated right now, even in his disguise, to see Langa.
Reki’s still not sure what made him call out for Langa like that during his beef with Joe. He just…couldn’t stand the sight of him right then. Looking much like he had before Reki had started breastfeeding him. Defeated, weary, downtrodden. No light in his eyes, no flush to his cheeks, no smile on his lips. Just gliding down the track like he seemed to be gliding through life before Reki had begun to literally nurse him back to health.
And somehow…seeing him like that, Reki became overcome with frustration, burning within him like acid. Was this what Reki gave up so much for? He’d let Langa feed from his breasts even though they weren’t even a couple, ruining his body and his prospects for other Alphas. And when the time had come, he’d even given him up so he could be free, even though it was the hardest thing Reki’s ever had to do. And for what? For Langa to slide back into that ill mindset and give up in a moment like this? His breasts felt so heavy in that moment, ached so much for him, wanting to nourish him and make him feel better again. And all those emotions and feelings seemed to spill over inside Reki like the milk from his nipples…alongside Langa’s name from his throat.
And now Langa knows he’s here, ruining all his plans for flying under the radar. So he can’t stay here. He can’t face Langa right now, if ever. It still hurts too much to even see him, to be reminded of everything Reki’s lost and all that can never be.
So he keeps running, even though his breath burns in his lungs and his limbs feel like lead, everything in him aching. But no matter his efforts, he’s only halfway up the S track when he hears the call, one that strikes deep in his bones, an ancient cry, “Reki!!”
Reki wants to flee, wants to hide, wants to disappear…but he feels frozen solid, as if his body interpreted that simple cry of his name as a Command. He can only stand still, starting to breathe harder with panic and pain, as he waits for his doom. This is exactly what he wanted to avoid and yet…
“Reki!” he hears Langa’s voice call for him again, now closer, just a heartbeat before a warm, familiar hand wraps around his chilled wrist. “I was looking everywhere for you. I knew I saw you here.”
Reki swallows. He doesn’t know what to say and can’t do anything, either. He wants to cry, but even his tears feel stuck somewhere between his heart and his head.
Langa rounds around him so they’re face-to-face, taking his other chilled hand into his. “Reki, please…” he says, softer now, seeking his gaze. “Talk to me. I can’t stand this anymore.”
Reki can’t stand it either, on more levels than one. His chest hurts so bad, he feels like he’s about to explode…
“Reki,” Langa says, and even before he’s finished saying his name once more, even before his blue eyes latch onto Reki’s chest…Reki can feel it. Smell it, too, like soured milk, ruined by his own stormy emotions and pheromones; not sweet as it usually is. His breasts have soaked through all his layers, creating wet, humiliating patches on his chest.
That seems to break the dam, as Reki finds himself sniffling, choking on his sudden, quiet sobs that shake his shoulders and ravage his soul. What has he done to deserve all this? Joe and Cherry were right, this isn’t something he should have to carry at his age, with the relationship he and Langa have – or rather, don’t have. He needs to go to the clinic first thing in the morning and get treatment for his condition; have it be over and done with. Maybe they can even reverse some of the effects on his body, so it won’t be so obvious he’s been breastfeeding an Alpha who’s not his boyfriend, let alone his mate, nor a family member. Maybe then Reki can put this whole matter behind himself and finally start to move on…
“Shit,” Langa curses, bringing him back to the moment. And before Reki has a chance to react properly, he finds himself being pulled along by his right hand, towards the woodsy area around the S track. “C’mon.”
Reki walks, as if in a daze. Maybe his body is still interpreting anything and everything Langa says as a Command, because he finds himself unable to do much else other than follow him as told. He still can’t even find the words to say anything, to try and make sense of at least some of this, let alone protest. Maybe he’s just become so used to going along with all of Langa’s wants and needs, having been so willing to indulge him so far in nearly everything that even now, he finds himself unable to deny him. And so, all he manages to do is to try and hold onto his breasts with his free hand. Try to make them hurt and bounce as little as possible, as well as hide the milk patches soaked through his parka from any prying eyes that might still be lingering around the track.
They stumble into the more secluded area, walking through the overgrown bushes and dry grass, behind the formations of trees. Langa pushes Reki against the trunk of one, and before Reki has a chance to so much as catch his breath, he’s opening up his parka. He drags it off Reki’s shoulders and down his arms, tossing it aside before also pulling up the hem of the t-shirt Reki put on under. As the cool air hits him, emphasizing how wet his clothes are, Reki realizes he must’ve soaked his bra through completely. The thought burns in his throat like a cry desperate to get out. He hopes it’s not completely ruined at least. Even with all the complicated feelings that come with wearing something so intimate Langa bought for him, the bras are at the very least much more comfortable than binding. And they were so expensive, too. Reki’s always been taught not to be wasteful, so it’s not like he’d just throw them away…
“Oh, Reki…” Langa breathes out, sounding pained.
Reki can only try and cover himself up with his arms, even though that causes his breasts to squish painfully and more milk to squirt out. But at least it’s enough to shock his voice to come back. “L-Langa, go away…don’t look at me…”
“No,” Langa says, grabbing onto his arms. He’s strong, his grip hurts. He’s always managed to defeat Reki physically, but he still tries to fight back as best as he can. He has to. If he doesn’t, it feels like everything will collapse. The last bit of his dignity will be shattered. Then he’ll truly be worth nothing. “I’m not letting you suffer alone anymore.”
“Langa, s-stop, stop,” Reki whimpers, a few tears finally slipping onto his cheeks. “We can’t do this anymore…”
“Reki, stop,” Langa growls and Reki feels the word down at his core, the same way he felt Langa’s call of his name before. Everything else he’s said before might not have been meant as a Command, though Reki’s pathetic body interpreted it as such. But this one definitely is, and Reki feels the effects immediately. He freezes, his arms relax against his will, and even his mind grows more blank, just wanting to obey with instinct. “Let me help you.”
Reki wants to protest, wants to tell him no again…but his body and mind, his stupid, weak Omega instincts, make it impossible for him to resist a direct Command from an Alpha as strong as Langa. He can’t help but yield, even holding his chest out for him to latch onto, as Commanded. And Langa takes full advantage of that, unzipping Reki’s bra in the front, letting it fall off, filling the air with more of his disgusting, sour smell. As soon as it does, Langa’s mouth is on Reki’s right nipple, familiar, intense and so, so wonderful in the way it relieves the pressure and tension.
“L-Langa…” Reki gasps, the relief flooding him seeming to release his tongue once more. “You really d-don’t have to do that…it must taste awful…”
“Reki is hurting,” Langa mumbles around his nipple. “So I’ll do this for Reki.”
Of course he will. Because deep down, as much of a brat and spoiled he can be, Langa is kind. Kind enough to even Command Reki so he can do this to help him feel a little better. It’s because of that that Reki still can’t hate him for doing it; because he knows Langa means well. And yet Reki’s been so awful to him, saying and doing hurtful things, avoiding him. He doesn’t deserve Langa. He knows he never did, but this just makes it hit home even more.
He sniffles quietly as another, stronger wave of tears washes over him. He tries hard not to make Langa notice – refusing to let his sobs make his body shake, refusing to make a sound – wanting so badly to still hide from him. But of course things can never be that simple. Maybe Langa felt one of the teardrops fall on his head. Maybe he tasted even more of Reki’s emotions in his milk. Maybe Reki’s just not as good at hiding his feelings when someone is so up close and personal as Langa is to him right now.
Whatever the reason, Langa’s blue eyes turn to look up towards his, teal and shimmering like the sea in summer sunshine. As he takes Reki in, though, they start to turn dark, like storm clouds overtaking the ocean sky. He gives one last hard suck on Reki’s nipple, emptying his right breast fully, before he swallows dutifully, no matter how sour the milk must taste. Afterwards, he stands up straighter, lifting up his thumb to caress Reki’s cheeks as he wipes his tears away.
“Don’t cry, Reki,” Langa says, his hand lingering to cradle Reki’s face. “I’m here.”
Whether it’s to prove his words on a more physical level, out of habit or just on a whim, Langa lifts Reki’s face slightly in order to press their lips together. Reki tastes the sour aftermath of his own milk in Langa’s mouth, as bittersweet as the kiss itself, but Reki still can’t help but moan into it from sheer instinct, longing and need, his arms coming to wrap around Langa’s neck. No matter what, it feels good to be touched like this, cherished like this, even if it’s all false. But that’s the way it’s been between them all this time, anyway.
As Reki opens his mouth to sigh, Langa swoops in as always to swallow his breath with his tongue, pushing it down Reki’s throat to consume more and more of him. At the same time, Reki feels his free hand start trailing down his body, its route also familiar by now. He knows he should stop Langa – things are still far too complicated between the two of them for this to be right or good for either of them at this moment – but he can’t. He’s missed his touch – him – so fucking much. That emotion, that need to be close to him again, drowns out everything else, including Reki’s more rational side that tries to tell him he’ll regret this later.
And so, he’s unable to do anything but desperately buck towards Langa’s hand and the sweet, sweet pleasure it brings as it finds its way inside his pants and underwear, starting to rub his pussy lips. It’s the first truly good thing Reki’s felt in weeks and his body craves it to the point he aches, wanting more and more with each touch Langa gives him.
“Reki…” Langa murmurs, pulling away from Reki’s lips in order to press kisses onto his cheeks, his chin, his neck, his shoulders, his collarbones, and his chest. As he takes Reki’s other, still-engorged breast into his mouth, he also starts to wiggle one finger inside Reki’s pussy, rubbing his inner walls so deliciously. Together with the relief of the pressure letting up fully in his chest, the feeling is downright euphoric, lifting Reki to dizzying heights.
“L-Langa…” Reki gasps, moving his hips slightly to coax his finger deeper, more or less riding it until it’s deep enough to rub against his g-spot. He hadn’t realized just how pent up he’s been, the haze of his mind leaving very little room to think about his libido. But the truth is, he’s been getting regular sexual pleasure from Langa for weeks, for months by now, and he can feel the difference of not being able to have it for a while in his body now. Just one finger, just Langa feeding from him, leaves him leaking slick onto Langa’s hand and into his own pants and underwear.
Langa probably feels him doing so, too, because he’s quick to add another finger, sucking a bit harder on Reki’s nipple at the same time. It’s embarrassing, but even this is enough to drive him close to the edge, his breath starting to grow sharper and faster.
“You gonna cum for me?” Langa murmurs, letting go of Reki’s nipple in order to lick it instead. “You gonna be a good girl for me and cum?”
The words are like a knife to the heart because they once again remind Reki of how he’s not the one Langa truly wants. How even in a moment like this, Langa’s thinking about that girl he likes, the one who Reki is just a placeholder for. He knows that even if Langa didn’t choose Adam over him, he would’ve eventually chosen someone else, like that girl. But even so, because Reki’s so pathetic, he can’t help but nod for him, letting out a whimper as Langa adds a third finger and starts to thrust all of them a bit faster, harder.
“C’mon, baby,” Langa murmurs breathily. “You can do it. Cum for me.”
Perhaps it’s Reki’s body once more interpreting those words as a Command, perhaps it’s him being so pent up, perhaps it’s Langa putting his mouth back around his nipple and starting to suckle out more milk…but he finds himself complying before he can even consciously think about it. He just shakes and whines as hot pleasure floods through him and then pours out of him like a geyser bursting. It’s amazing, it leaves him weak-kneed, dizzy and panting, thankful he’s still resting against a tree trunk and has his arms around Langa for additional support.
“Good girl,” Langa coos, rubbing Reki through the final aftershocks of his orgasm, before pulling his fingers out and tasting Reki’s fluids on them as he always does. But before Reki can fully compose himself enough, catch his breath enough to try and figure out what comes next, what’s meant to happen now…Langa’s hands trail onto the front of his own pants, undoing his belt and pushing down his jeans and underwear.
“Reki…” Langa breathes out and as Reki lifts his head to look him in the eyes, the expression on his face is…for the lack of a better word, dark. He looks out of his mind, face flustered and pupils blown so there’s only the thinnest ring of blue around the black. His breath is coming out short, hot against Reki’s face, smelling of his milk – not as sour anymore, likely due to Reki’s pleasure just now. Beyond it, his own scent is sharper, stronger, mintier. Is he…?
Reki’s mouth feels suddenly dry and he swallows. He gets the sense he’s in danger, like a rabbit cornered by a wolf. “L-Langa, what…”
Langa steals whatever Reki might’ve been about to say from his mouth with another intense kiss, shoving his tongue down deep, as his hands settle on his shoulders to push him tighter against the tree. Before Reki even has the time to properly figure out the situation, he feels it. Something hard and thick rubbing against his bare lower lips, closer and more intimate than ever before.
“Mmm!” he tries to gasp out, to talk some sense into Langa, but him trying to resist only ends with Langa holding him against the tree tighter, harder. He’s in that mode again, not giving up until he gets what he wants, driven by some urge that’s greater than both him and Reki.
Meaning, he’s probably in rut. And with the way he keeps grinding his cock against Reki’s opening, it’s driving him to do something, cross a line that, even with everything else they’ve done together so far, they haven’t stepped over before.
And this really isn’t how Reki wanted that to happen, with Langa or with anyone. His romantic side had always hoped his proper first time, whenever it might come, would be special and loving – if not done on a bed of roses, then at least in the intimate comfort of an actual bed. He wanted it to be full of gentle touches and affectionate words; an expression of his and his partner’s feelings for one another. Not a tryst in the middle of the forest, just a degree away from being public once again. Not when things are still so complicated and hurt between him and Langa.
Not when Langa doesn’t love him back. Not when he’s not in his right mind, even, probably just going for Reki now, in the state he’s in, because he’s the closest warm body, just like he’s been all this time.
But…if there’s anything Reki’s learned in life, it’s that things don’t always go according to his plans or hopes. In fact, most of the time, they don’t. He never planned to become a milk supply for an Alpha he barely knew at the time; never intended to become sexually involved with Langa in the other ways, either, yet here they are. This might be the best first time someone like Reki can ever have, especially now that his body is ruined for other Alphas in general, too. He’s already done so much damage to himself and his prospects, before and after Langa came into his life.
What’s a little more after all that?
At least he’ll get to do it with the one he loves, just once. He’ll get to have that taste, to just know what it feels like. Langa will probably regret all of this in the morning and Reki already feels a stab of guilt in his chest for taking advantage of him like this, when he’s not thinking clearly. But he can’t push him away, neither physically nor emotionally. So he might as well just enjoy it while it happens, even if it destroys everything still lingering between them forever.
So as they keep kissing and Langa’s tip settles properly inside Reki’s entrance, ready to push in, Reki does his best to relax as much as he can while standing up like this. He knows from everything else they’ve done so far that Langa’s big. The way he fingerfucked Reki before has prepped and opened him up some, but Reki’s pretty sure it’ll still be a tight fit. So he needs to do his best not to tense up too much or it’ll just be more difficult for both of them.
Langa grunts and pants into Reki’s mouth as he thrusts further inside him. Reki himself whimpers, the stretch of Langa on his untrained muscles intense. Reki is wet from before, but Langa’s cock is still the biggest thing he’s ever taken. At least, despite what must be a great need within him, Langa does it all fairly slowly, putting in only a bit of himself at a time rather than just shoving in mindlessly. Still, it stings as he breaks Reki’s hymen, and Reki feels a tear slip out of his eye at the slight pain of it.
To his surprise, Langa pulls away from his mouth to kiss that tear away from his cheek. “Reki…”
He keeps pushing deeper inside, pressing more kisses to Reki’s face in a heartbreaking imitation of affection. The intensity of it all feels like it’s frying Reki’s brain, all rational thought leaving him. All he can think about is how Langa’s cock feels, carving a space inside him. There’s still some ache to it all, but it also begins to feel better and better, even though it feels like it lasts forever for Langa to just finish putting himself fully inside Reki. Instinct is probably taking over, making Reki accommodate and accept the one his body has long since claimed as his Alpha, even if it’s not mutual. As much as Langa’s made him his milk supply, so has he made Reki his in general, too. So Reki knows his body can take this.
When Langa’s finally inside him to the root, pausing there for the moment, Reki swears he can even feel him up in his cervix. This is the fullest he’s ever been by a long shot and his ears ring with it, blood rushing to his head so fast he feels dizzy. He can even sense how Langa pulses and throbs inside him, the fit is so snug; both their muscles spasming against each other.
“So good for me…” Langa mumbles breathlessly. His hands begin to trail down from Reki’s shoulders, over his sides, until they settle on his back thighs, just under his rear. Probably to hold him steady, as once he’s supporting Reki upright in that manner, Langa begins to pull out of Reki. Slowly, gently, like his cock is kissing each cell on Reki’s walls.
Once he’s nearly out, Langa pushes back inside, punching the breath out of Reki. It’s still intense, but in a good, better way, pleasurable sparks rushing through Reki, tingling within him. Langa repeats the motion again, this time faster. Then again. And again. And again, faster each time as the slide becomes easier, as he builds up a rhythm and Reki gets wetter and wetter.
It all also starts to feel better and better for Reki, too, with each movement. The sparks from the first thrusts slowly turn into proper flames, leaving him unable to do anything but take it and enjoy it. He might be more or less a cocksleeve for Langa to use right now, but it at least feels good for him, too. Langa always fucks with such precision, such passion, that Reki only becomes a speck swept away in his storm. Unable to break away, his mind so far gone from pleasure that he doesn’t even care anymore if any of this makes sense or not.
Maybe Langa feels the same way, though, in his rut-induced haze, as all he can seem to be able to say is just a mindless chant of, “Reki, Reki, Reki…” with each thrust.
Reki’s not entirely sure why Langa does what he does next. Maybe he needs even more than Reki’s currently giving him. Maybe it’s just the rut brain wanting to showcase his prowess. Maybe Langa just sees an opportunity and takes it. But without missing a beat, Langa’s suddenly lifting him up against the tree, fucking into him even harder, faster, rougher, impaling Reki on his cock.
“Aaahh!” is all Reki can let out, his thoughts turning into proper mush. Langa’s impossibly deep, it’s so amazing. Reki’s own weight is drawing him inside, sucking him into his deepest hidden caverns. The pleasure inside him is now truly, fully aflame, burning inside him as a pressure builds, like a volcano about to erupt. “Fuck, L-Langa!”
That’s when Langa kisses him heatedly on the lips, stealing Reki’s words out of his mouth, and that’s about all Reki can take. His orgasm ravages through him like wildfire, like lava bursting from within the earth. He gushes in a way he never has before, in a way he didn’t know he could, wrung dry like a rag after a wash. It’s only made better as Langa cums just moments later, grunting and bursting warm inside Reki, stretching him ever further with his knot.
“Reki…” Langa gasps out again, while Reki’s still trying to gather his breath, thoughts and words, pressing sweet kisses to his cheeks, nose and lips. “Reki…”
It takes a few more beats for Reki’s rational mind to return to him. For it to really hit him what they just did. He just lost his virginity in the middle of the woods of Crazy Rock. With the guy he’s loved since day one, who can’t and won’t feel the same way about him. Who has another sweetheart somewhere and is in his rut, just using Reki as a warm cavern to bury his seed. And he knotted Reki and came inside him, too.
He takes in deep, even, controlled breaths, to not break down right then and there. He can’t, not yet. He’s still stuck to Langa for at least a few minutes, after all. And even following that…he shouldn’t leave him alone as he is. Someone else could take advantage, someone worse than Reki.
He swallows hard, counting his breaths in his head. He knows deep down he’s no better than anyone he might be imagining in his head. He’s used Langa, too; done such a terrible thing to someone who thought of him as a friend. And yeah, it’s true Reki felt he couldn’t run, but surely he could’ve fought Langa more? Done something to keep him from making this terrible mistake?
But he’s weak. He’s always been weak when it comes to Langa.
It’s yet another reason why Reki never deserved him.
The Alpha seems oblivious to Reki’s inner turmoil, just pressing sweet butterfly kisses everywhere on him that he can reach, before latching onto his breasts again to feed. Maybe that’s for the best. It gives Reki something to focus on with how familiar the act of it is by now. He just holds onto Langa, petting his hair as he slowly settles back down onto his feet to carry his own weight, while Langa nurses his breasts empty.
Little by little, Reki’s able to help Langa slide out of him. As Reki’s sopping cunt is revealed to Langa in the aftermath, both their white cum with a dash of red blood starting to flood out of him, Langa gives him another hungry look, licking his lips. But this time, Reki’s determined not to let things escalate any more than they have, and he quickly rushes to pull his pants back up, despite how nasty it feels to have all that wetness starting to gather in his underwear. He also helps Langa pull his pants back up to make sure he doesn’t get any ideas.
“C’mon,” Reki says, this time taking Langa’s hand to drag him along. “Let’s find the others.”
They get lucky there, at least. Reki spots Shadow’s car driving down the track soon enough after returning to it, and Reki quickly starts to pull Langa along to follow him. What they find where Shadow has stopped is Cherry, looking like he’s been beat to hell, barely if at all conscious in Joe’s arms. Reki wants to ask what happened, what’s going on…but this is all just too much to deal with right now. He can’t handle this. He needs to get away.
So he just more or less shoves Langa into the front seat of Shadow’s car instead, buckling his seatbelt. “I think he’s in rut. Make sure he gets home safe.”
Then he runs, despite everything. Despite how much his legs feel like lead. Despite how much the movement causes more cum to slide out of him. Despite the way Shadow curses after him, the way Joe calls his name in concern and Langa, seeming to have come out of his daze now that Reki’s left him alone, in desperation.
You could’ve hitched a ride with them, too, idiot, the more rational part of Reki tells him. It would’ve been much faster, a much easier way to get out of here. But he can’t face any of them right now, not when they would clearly be able to smell what he and Langa have just done. He just needs to be alone.
It’s a blur how he gets back into town. He thinks he must’ve walked, given how his body aches by the time he reaches a drugstore near his house. Normally, he’d make sure to do this kind of shopping far away from where his mom might go and find him, but tonight, he can’t bring himself to care. All he knows is that he needs a morning after pill right now. And after that, he needs to go home and hide away from the world for as long as possible. Maybe forever.
Reki takes the pill with some bottled water he also bought, before starting to tread the rest of the way home. He re-enters back into his room the same way he exited it earlier; through his ramp and his open window. As silent as he can make it, so he won’t wake everyone else up, he next heads to the bathroom and washes himself up as thoroughly as he can in the shower.
As he gets to between his legs, he sucks in his lower lip, muffling a sound of pain. He’s sore down there. Langa must’ve ripped him a bit after all. But he doesn’t stop washing, doesn’t stop digging out the fingerfuls of cum from inside him, trying to scrape it all off. Like that can purify him of his sins. The pain that comes with doing that is almost preferable, feels almost good, in comparison to the agony inside him, anyway.
He sniffles. And that’s when the dam breaks, under the shock of the proper ache in his body, and he starts sobbing silently.
Now Reki knows for a fact he and Langa will never be together in any way. Not even as friends anymore. He won’t let them be. It would be just too cruel. Langa deserves so much better than what Reki gave him tonight.
He’s not sure yet what he’s going to do. It’s been hard enough to avoid him as is. But even if it means never seeing Langa again…Reki will stay away from him. He’ll finally go to the doctor to get the milk flow stopped for good, too.
Whatever it takes to break all of these harmful ties between the two of them, he’ll do it. They’re ties that just hurt both of them and keep them from finding real happiness, anyway.
Reki has to be strong now. Strong enough to let go. For Langa’s sake.