Work Text:
Xie Lian: Finally tied the knot with @Hua Cheng. I couldn’t be happier to be married to you, San Lang! [Attached image of two hands tied with red threads in front of a marriage license]
⤷Hua Cheng: I think I ascended to the heavens when they gave us the stamp
***
Shi Qingxuan sat down in front of Mu Qing and Feng Xin with a serious expression for once, his clothes shockingly plain, as if to highlight the severity of the situation.
“What exactly is it you called us for?” My Qing crossed his arms.
“We should wait until Yizhen arrives to start, I don’t know if I can say this more than once.” Shi Qingxuan pursed his lips with clear dismay.
“Why are you being so weird about this?”
“Just tell us, we can repeat it for Yizhen,” Feng Xin insisted.
Shi Qingxuan hesitated before nodding. “Alright, fine! This is a pre-intervention meeting for Xie Lian and his infidelity! We need to present a united front when we confront him!”
“…”
“…”
“……..”
“WHAT?”
***
Crimson Rain: New piece based on my muse [Detailed sketch of Xie Lian, mostly nude with a marker placed on the page to censor his crotch]
⤷Xie Lian: I didn’t realize you were posting it!
⤷Crimson Rain: Afraid your husband might see, gege?
***
“There’s absolutely no way Xie Lian is cheating on the red menace. They just got married.” Mu Qing rolled his eyes. “What exactly are you basing this on?”
“How closely do you follow Xie-Xiong on HeadScroll?”
“We’re mutuals? I see when he posts?”
“I’ve noticed he’s been… here. I printed out screenshots.” Shi Qingxuan hung his head, sliding over a folder of screenshots of Xie Lian replying to the profiles of different men who clearly had some sort of relationship with him.
Feng Xin and Mu Qing read through the evidence with the silence weighing heavier and heavier on the group.
“This can’t…”
“Did you look into these men?” Mu Qing snapped, not wanting to hear whatever betrayed nonsense Feng Xin had to say.
“I did. Crimson Rain is an art account, I think professionally? I couldn’t really tell. I can’t find any face pictures but he’s posted sketches of Xie-Xiong a few times over the years and they’ve gotten more… suggestive in the recent ones I can find. Xiao Hong’s account is pretty locked down and he rejected my friend request. I can only see the conversations Xie Lian has replied to and no hints about what he looks like or anything like that but based on his friends list I think he’s younger than us? At least the people he’s mutuals with seem to skew younger. Wu Ming doesn’t follow anyone except Xie-Xiong and the account is locked. It’s obviously a throwaway with a name like that.”
“There’s no reason for Crimson or Xiao Hong to make a throwaway if they’re open about the affair on their main,” Mu Qing frowned. “Any chance Crimson is Xiao Hong’s art account?”
“I don’t think so? Xie Lian is the only mutual friend they share. Wouldn’t friends support his professional account if he was the same person?”
Feng Xin was mute, staring at the printed conversations in utter shock at the thought his best friend could do such a thing.
***
Xiao Hong: He’s too beautiful right now not to post [Attached picture of Xie Lian from bare shoulders up, clearly sweaty in a hotel bed and fast asleep]
⤷Xie Lian: WHEN DID YOU TAKE THAT
⤷Xiao Hong: After you took my virginity ^.^
⤷Xie Lian: STOP CALLING IT THAT
***
“Do you think there’s a chance—“ Mu Qing made a face as if he really didn’t want to say it, but pushed through, “Hua Cheng knows?”
“How could he know and be fine with something like this?!” Feng Xin broke from his stupor.
“Yeah, they’re married!” Shi Qingxuan insisted.
Mu Qing closed his eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose in disgust. “Considering how tied at the hip those two are, wouldn’t it be more odd if he didn’t know? Besides, if Qingxuan can see the messages, Hua Cheng definitely can.”
“Some of these posts outright say they’ve slept with him!” Shi Qingxuan despaired.
Mu Qing let out an exhausted sigh. “I do not want to explain cuckolding kinks to two grown adults.”
Feng Xin let out a nonsense of a yell before managing to calm himself back down, cheeks pink. “If. If Hua Cheng knows then. It’s none of our business.”
“What if he doesn’t?”
“Then he’s an idiot, Xie Lian is hardly hiding it.” Mu Qing rolled his eyes.
“He’s an idiot for trusting his partner?!”
***
Wu Ming: Does getting married make someone more handsome?
⤷Xie Lian: My San Lang might be more handsome after getting married, it’s hard to tell, he was already too handsome to begin with
⤷Wu Ming: Want to help me test my other theory?
⤷Xie Lian: ???
⤷Wu Ming: Sex with a married man is even better <3
⤷Xie Lian: Haven’t we already tested that one?
⤷Wu Ming Theories require many trials to prove
***
Ultimately Quan Yizhen never showed up. Likely he’d forgotten Shi Qingxuan invited him, distracted by better things.
It was probably for the best though, because he surely wouldn’t have been helpful during the argument that followed. And he also probably wouldn’t have wanted to come on the immediate field trip the trio took, evidence in hand, to the Xie-Hua residence.
“Gege, did you invite Qingxuan and the idiots?” Hua Cheng called as he opened the door.
Feng Xin opened his mouth to immediately confront the matter, only to be stopped with Mu Qing’s hand slapped over his mouth.
“Wait until we’re inside, dumbass!”
Xie Lian trotted into view, resting lovingly against his husband with their usual amount of shameless dogfood. “I don’t think so? Did I miss a text?”
“We need to talk to you,” Shi Qingxuan swallowed his nerves.
Sensing the seriousness in his tone, Xie Lian waved them in.
The group settled solemnly in the living room, Xie Lian curling up against his husband as usual while the three awkwardly shared the two armchairs the couple had in the living room.
“What’s wrong?”
It was clear only Xie Lian really cared about whatever had them coming by without notice. Hua Cheng had obviously tuned them out, focused on tracing patterning on Xie Lian’s arm where his hand rested.
Shi Qingxuan tried to gather his words, regretting that he hadn’t dressed up for this. Perhaps it would’ve been easier as a woman after all.
Feng Xin refused to look at them, uncomfortable with either outcome for different reasons and hesitant to mention it as a result.
Finally Mu Qing let out a frustrated sigh. “Does your husband know you’re fucking other men?”
Xie Lian and Hua Cheng both froze.
“…”
“…”
“Haha… um. I’m not?” Xie Lian’s defense sounded truly more confused than guilty.
“Crimson Rain, Xiao Hong, and Wu Ming. We know about them.” Shi Qingxuan found his voice at last.
Xie Lian covered his quickly redding face as Hua Cheng’s lips quirked in a grin.
“I told you he fucking knew, look at that expression!” Mu Qing groaned.
Feng Xin, though discomforted by the knowledge of his best friend’s apparently adventurous sex life, felt something calm in him at the confirmation he at least wasn’t a cheater. “You still weren’t sure enough that you had to come with us!”
“I just wanted to be here when you saw I was right!”
Shi Qingxuan sat back, his tension cut like a puppet’s strings. What a relief that Mu Qing had been right. He really hadn’t thought Xie Lian would be the type to get up to such things, but then, he hadn’t expected him to cheat either before he saw the messages.
“I’m really not,” Xie Lian cried behind his hands after Hua Cheng whispered something in his ear.
“Keep your cuckoldry play offline if you don’t want people to know, it’s not like we wanted to know either.”
“It’s really not like that! Every name you said is San Lang!” Xie Lian dropped his hands from his bright red face to defend himself.
Mu Qing took the evidence folder from Shi Qingxuan’s hands, pulling out a few conversations that clearly referenced Xie Lian’s husband as a different person and handing them over. “We aren’t stupid.”
Xie Lian only had to scan the contents to understand what they were, looking more bullied as he covered his face again. “I didn’t realize those replies were public. I thought since San Lang’s accounts were private…”
Hua Cheng chuckled by his side. “Won’t you tell your poor husband which of your affair partners is your favorite? I need to know how I rank in the competition.”
“San Lang don’t encourage this weird misunderstanding!”
Snickering, Hua Cheng snuck a few kisses to apologize before coaxing Xie Lian into his lap so he could hold him. “He’s not completely wrong, it is sometimes a bit of a cuckolding kink thing.”
“We don’t need details!” Feng Xin insisted.
“They’re all San Lang! It’s roleplay! We roleplay sometimes that we met differently! You knew we did this! We don’t need to go into details!”
And actually, they did know that. It was well known dogfood in the friend group that Xie Lian and Hua Cheng pretended to meet for the first time to have a new first date once a year.
“…You make entirely new profiles every year for a stupid date?”
“That’s not possible, the Crimson Rain and Xiao Hong accounts were well established.”
“Xiao Hong was his account from when he was young, before he created his current one with his actual name. Crimson Rain has always been his art account. Wu Ming is just a throwaway he uses to look into people. He’s always had those accounts, he just doesn’t want most people following them.” Xie Lian explained wearily.
“En, gege’s telling the truth.” Hua Cheng kissed his cheek.
“I can’t believe you printed these out…”
“I thought you needed an intervention! Cheating is serious, Xie-Xiong.”
Xie Lian sighed, reaching back to cup his husband’s cheek. “Well. I suppose I should be grateful you’d defend San Lang if I did something like that even knowing how you feel about him.”
“Should we invite them to our next date so they can catch us in the act and expose us to your husband,” Hua Cheng teased.
Simultaneously deciding they’d had enough, Feng Xin and Mu Qing stood to leave.
“Since everything’s fine I’ll go.”
“Stop saying shit like this in front of us!”
Xie Lian stared at his ceiling and contemplated deleting his entire HeadScroll account in embarrassment. It wouldn’t make this conversation not have happened though.
“I’m.” Shi Qingxuan stood, the last of their guests and the instigator of it all. “I’m sorry for dragging this up, I just…”
Xie Lian’s eyes dropped back to meet his, giving him a tired but true smile. “Thank you for looking after San Lang for me. Truly.”
Smiling back awkwardly, Shi Qingxuan nodded, saying a few goodbyes before leaving the couple behind.
“Gege never answered my question.” Hua Cheng spoke up in the quiet of their emptied living room.
“Question?”
“Which version do you like best?”
Laughing at the ridiculousness of it all, Xie Lian turned his head to ghost his lips over his husband’s. “Just you.” And before his husband could argue or tease more, he sealed that truth with a kiss.