Work Text:
Shane 😘❤️❤️❤️😘🍆
August 10th, 2017 11:56 AM
Made it through security.
❤️
Glad you’re safe
I mean obviously, you’re safe. You’re in the airport.
But you know.
Fuck, I miss you already.
I miss you, too.
Feels like I’m missing a lung or something now that you’re gone.
You might want to get that checked out.
Sounds serious.
Yeah, I don’t think it’s going away any time soon.
These last few weeks have been the best of my life.
I’m glad we finally got our shit together.
Me too.
I did not think I could ever have even a fraction of this.
I do not know how I’ll survive until I see you again.
So dramatic.
It is only two months, I guess.
Not that long.
It’s fucking forever.
Now who’s being dramatic?
I’ve spent too much time around you ❤️
We’ll talk all the time though, right?
Every day.
And we’ll have phone sex still?
As if you could survive without it.
As if you could.
I love you, Shane Hollander.
I love you too, Ilya Rozanov.
Call me when you land?
Only an immigration officer could stop me.
August 10th, 2017 6:48 PM
Pop-Tarts
Oreos
Coke
Lucky Charms
Spicy chips that make me drink water
?
Did you mean to put this in your notes app?
No.
You are my notes app now.
You admit you are in love with me, so you are now blessed to listen to my...
What is it called? Like the river of your thinkings?
Stream of consciousness.
Yes, that is it.
Thank you, boyfriend 😘😘😘
I feel like I should be annoyed by that, but I’m not at all.
More importantly, what the fuck is that list of items?
Is that your grocery list?
Yes.
It’s okay to admit you are jealous.
Holy shit, Ilya.
How the hell are you a professional athlete?
It is just snacks.
And you didn’t let even let me finish my list.
By all means go ahead.
Ice cream
Loads of beef.
Now I am done.
Wow. Can’t believe I almost missed out on loads of beef.
Can’t the NHL’s top player eat his processed sugar in peace without his boyfriend nagging him about it?
No.
And top player my ass.
I have definitely topped in your ass.
🙄
You better hope our texts never leak.
Can you imagine the headlines?
Boston Bears’ Ilya Rozanov Eats Like 10 Year Old at a Sleepover
Yes, it would be such a scandal that no one would pay attention at all to how much we talk about sucking each other’s cocks.
Oh, god. Fuck. I don’t even want to think about that.
Call me when you get back from dinner tonight?
You can speak Russian to me until I fall asleep.
Maybe you can read your grocery list and it won’t sound so bad in another language.
Of course ❤️
Love you.
I love you so much.
August 27th, 2017 9:00 PM
Are you ready? It’s starting.
Yes, you giant nerd.
If only you had been as eager to admit your feelings for me as you are to watch Game of Thrones, it might have saved us years.
Like you were out there admitting you loved me.
And hey, don’t act like you haven’t enjoyed watching this, too.
I bet you are so sad I am not there to sing the theme song to you.
Devastated.
Oh, it’s the pretty one!
Are you talking about Jamie?
Yes. He is the pretty one. The sister is the mean one, and the other brother is the smart one.
You know, with these nicknames you have for so many of the characters, you could have just learned their names.
But then I can’t annoy you with the nicknames.
‘Maybe it really is all cocks in the end.’
That will be my next tattoo.
No.
The bear is bad enough.
You’re lucky I still find you attractive with that thing.
You know nothing Jon Snow.
My mom says I look like him a little bit.
I do not see it.
You are prettier, and he can grow an actual beard.
I guess I can’t be too insulted by that.
Wait, those two giant ones are brothers?
Yes.
Since when?
Since always? Were you not paying attention to the other six seasons of this we watched at the cottage?
Mostly, I was thinking of ways to distract you.
Ooo, dragons 🐉🐉🐉
RIP Viserion
You remember the name of the dragon but not that two characters are brothers?
Obviously, I’m going to remember the DRAGONS.
Would you stab me or burn me if I turned into one of those zombie things?
White Walkers.
And absolutely, I would.
😢😢😢😢
You wouldn’t be you anymore!
I figured you’d want that!
So many pretty men and women on this show.
A bisexual dream.
Don’t make me regret watching this with you.
As if you didn’t regret it five minutes in when I started asking questions.
Is small thumb finally about to die?
Little Finger.
And god, I hope so.
He’s the fucking worst.
Wait.
Are they saying Jon Snow is a dragon guy?
Yep.
Sure seems that way.
But that would mean Danielle is what his aunt? The one he’s fucking?
Daenerys and yes.
Yuck.
Yeah, it’s not great.
Kind of ruins the whole hot people fucking illusion.
Well, will we watch the next episode next week?
No. This was the finale.
Next season won’t be out for a year at least. Maybe more.
What the fuck?
You make me watch days worth of this show and it is not even finished?!??!
What kind of deceit is this?
I told you it wasn’t finished!
I have no memory of this.
That’s not my fault.
Is there at least a book or something I can look at the end to see how it finishes?
Uh no. The show is past the books at this point.
You better be glad I love you, Shane Hollander.
Not everyone would put up with this.
You can pick the next show we watch if that helps.
You better believe I am picking the next show.
And it’s going to be some reality show with a bunch of rich housewives in it with seventeen seasons.
The things you do for love.
September 9th, 2017 7:31 AM
Happy first day of training camp!
If any of the other boys are mean to you, you tell them your big, bad boyfriend is very mean and will not like it.
And stay away from that Pike boy. He is bad news.
I’m the captain of the fucking team, asshole.
I think I’ll be just fine.
And you and Hayden will be friends some day whether you like it or not.
Don’t put that negativity out into the world.
Call me later? I want to hear all about your day.
Of course.
Love you.
Love you more.
September 17th, 2017 8:49 PM
Are you home?
No, I’m at Hayden’s.
Boooo.
I am horny.
I’m shocked.
Can’t you go home?
I just got here thirty minutes ago.
I would be kind of rude to leave now.
No it wouldn’t.
‘Hey, Hayden. My secret rival boyfriend that I only see six times a year is very horny and in need of my pretty face to jerk off. Can I have a raincheck on whatever boring get together this is?’
Right, let me just repeat that word for word.
Fine.
Stay at Hayden’s and definitely don’t think about a warm, wet mouth on your cock.
Ilya.
Defintiely don’t think about me sucking you all the way down.
Rolling your balls around in my mouth.
Playing with your asshole. Opening you up.
Letting you come down my throat before I sink into you and it feels so good you start to cry.
Ilya Rozanov.
What?!
I said definitely do not think about that!
I can’t stand you.
Let me find a bathroom upstairs.
You better be available to FaceTime.
I have nothing but time for you ❤️
September 30th, 2017 4:21 PM
Your mother sent me something she calls a care package?
But it is just a giant box of sweets.
Yeah, she asked me for your address a few days ago.
I might have mentioned you have a pretty epic sweet tooth and she loves to bake so.
Don’t be surprised if you start getting those pretty regularly.
Does this mean she likes me okay?
Yeah, I would say so.
More than likes you actually.
Once Yuna brings you into the fold, you’re not getting out.
Oh.
You’re a Hollander now whether you like it or not.
Welcome to the family.
Just maybe try not to eat all of them at once, maybe?
Last thing I need is you getting sick when I’m 500km away.
With everything I am feeling right now, I can make no guarantees.
October 8th 2017, 5:55 PM
Good luck tonight!
I do not need luck.
It is just Toronto.
Good to see our relationship hasn’t softened your ego at all.
Would you really want it to?
No.
Good luck to you, too.
Why would I need luck? It’s just Detroit.
God, I love you.
Give them hell, Hollander.
I always do ❤️
October 12th, 2017 11:41 PM
Cliff brought a girl over for me tonight.
Oh, really?
How did that go?
It didn’t.
Just told her I wasn’t interested.
Was that weird?
No ❤️
Felt good actually.
Did Cliff say anything?
I just told him I was not interested in random hookups anymore.
He believed you?
Cliff still believes in Santa Claus, so yes.
It was an easy sell.
And it is not a lie. Just not a whole truth.
Do you think he’ll be okay when he learns the truth some day?
I like to think so, but I cannot be sure.
It’ll be worth it, I hope.
You are worth everything, Hollander.
October 17th, 2017 10:17 PM
Can I still come over or are you too pissed at me?
Yes, I’m fucking pissed at you.
You were purposefully riling up my players all night long.
Why the fuck wouldn’t I be pissed at you?
You cannot seriously be mad at me for playing the game I have always played.
I did nothing differently than I would have done before we got together, and you know that.
But you’re taking unnecessary risks getting into fights that might get you hurt, you idiot.
THAT’S what I care about.
Excuse me for caring about your fucking well being.
Shane.
Of course you can come over.
I always want you here.
But don’t expect me to be happy about you fighting fights you don’t have to.
Ever. I don’t care what kind of game you play.
I’m always going to worry about you getting hurt, and it won’t keep me from playing my best against you, but it’s also not going to stop me being angry as fuck at you afterwards.
I get it, okay?
I’m sorry, I do not mean to worry you so much.
Would it help if I let you yell at me for 15 minutes and I won’t say anything back?
Make it 20 and you bend me over the couch afterwards and we have a deal.
Be there soon ❤️
November 8th, 2017 11:12 AM
Why are you sending me pictures of your penthouse?
Just making a diary of all the places I am going to fuck you when you are here next week.
We are not fucking in the building pool.
Or your balcony.
BORING.
You are staying the night, yes?
It is an afternoon game.
Yes ❤️
I promise I won’t run away this time.
I wasn’t worried about that at all ❤️
But no tuna this time just to be safe.
How about I cook for you this time?
After seeing your grocery list, I’m not sure I trust you to make anything that won’t kill me.
Well, I mean. If you insist.
November 15th, 2017 10:15 PM
You looked good tonight.
Your team…not so much.
Thanks.
You didn’t look as good as me, but who does, really?
Right.
No, no. You are supposed to say ‘Fuck off, Rozanov.’
Fuck off, Rozanov.
And then I say, ‘Have you checked who is leading in goals for the league?’
Fuck off, Rozanov.
You learn so fast.
Are you alright?
No, I just miss you.
It’s hard some days, you know?
Like I thought it would be easy since we’ve never really been together together, but it’s fucking hard.
Go outside on your deck.
What, no, ‘I know something else that’s hard’ joke?
Go outside, Shane.
Okay? I’m outside?
Are you looking at the sky?
I am now.
Good.
Me too.
You want to expand on what the fuck is happening at all?
It’s freezing out here.
My mama used to tell me that the person I was going to love and marry when I grew up was looking at the same stars, so if I was ever lonely I could look up and know I was not alone. Because they were out there looking up, too.
But what if you didn’t live in the same timezone?
Shane.
Or if they’re from the Southern Hemisphere? It would be a completely different sky.
Or if it’s cloudy?
Shane Hollander.
Turn your brain off.
It’s romantic!
We’re seeing the same sky even though we are far away.
Right. Sorry.
It’s really sweet.
And weirdly does make me feel better.
❤️
The person you’re going to marry, huh?
Yes, I’m also texting Sveta right now.
TOO SOON, ASSHOLE.
Did you know you have a little gathering of freckles on the back of your neck that is shaped like Orion’s Belt?
Uh, no.
Can’t say I’ve spent much time looking at the back of my neck.
And the freckles on your nose are like a whole galaxy.
You are really laying it on thick today.
You love me.
I do.
More than anything.
And soon you will see me so often, you’ll be sick of me.
Never.
I will marry you someday, Shane Hollander.
I’m counting on it.
And Shane?
Yeah?
I miss you, too.
November 21st, 2017 6:28 PM
Hey, I just got an alert you’re not playing in Ottawa tonight?
What’s going on, are you hurt?
No, I am not hurt.
Thank god.
But what happened?
I am sick.
It is nothing serious.
Your team doctor wouldn’t clear you to play?
No, I have a tiny fever.
What’s tiny?
Just 39°.
39?! Ilya. That’s not tiny.
Fuck, where are you right now?
Do you have meds?
Have you eaten?
Is someone taking care of you?
I am by myself at the hotel. Someone is checking on me every few hours or so.
I am fine.
Just enjoy your chance to overtake me in goals this week.
Fuck that.
What’s your room number?
1578
Just hang tight there, okay?
I’m sending reinforcements.
If I had any more energy, I would be afraid to know what that means.
November 21st, 2017 8:09 PM
You sent your mother?
Really?
Yes, really.
No one heals a person quite like Yuna Hollander heals the sick.
Did she bring you soup from Farm Boy?
Yes.
It’s good, isn’t it?
Yes.
You’re welcome.
She is fussing over me as if I am a toddler.
I want to hate it, but I don’t.
I kind of want to cry.
If you need to, you should.
She’ll sit with you and stroke your hair until you fall asleep.
It’s okay to let yourself be mothered.
If anyone deserves it, it’s you.
I love you.
Thank you for sending her to me.
I love you, too.
Get some rest ❤️
And definitely check out the goals race when you feel better.
You little shit.
December 25th, 2017 2:16 PM
Merry Christmas!
Wish you were here.
Merry Christmas, sweetheart.
Have you gotten anything exciting as a gift?
No.
My parents keep saying that my gift is coming soon, but there’s no mail today, so I have no idea what they would be getting at, but they seem really smug about it?
I dunno. They’re weird.
How’s your day been?
Pretty boring.
You would love it.
Ha ha. Very funny.
The doorbell just rang?
Mom is insisting I answer it.
Who the fuck rings a doorbell on Christmas?
December 27th, 2017 9:21 AM
Miss you already.
Did you know you left a sweatshirt here?
I did not.
I have everything I came with.
I definitely did not purposefully leave my clothing for you to wear when you miss me.
❤️
Wish I had something to give you in return.
But you and your giant ass arms and shoulders make that kind of impossible.
Oh, do not worry.
I stole some of your underwear.
I feel like I know you so well, and yet, I have no idea if you’re kidding or not.
😉
January 28th, 2018 12:51 PM
Did you see the skills competition assignments?
Looks like I’ll have several opportunities to beat your ass.
So much confidence for such a slow, veteran hockey player with a terribly underdeveloped backhand.
My backhand is FINE thank you very much.
And I think last year’s results speak for themselves.
Maybe. But I honestly do not care about this competition.
I will be taking part in another skills competition afterwards.
Oh, really?
What competition is that?
The one where I see how many times I can make Shane Hollander come in an hour while I praise him about how good he is at hockey.
How adored he is by everyone.
God, I can’t wait.
Fuck me.
Yes, well. That is a major component of the competition, so it seems I have no choice.
🍑👅💦
February 2nd, 2018 3:34 PM
Just got off the phone with my realtor.
Condo is officially off the market.
Goodbye, Sex Building.
You served us well.
May your new owners be young and hot and horny.
🙄
It’s a retired couple, so.
I think the condo is getting a break from all that.
Hey. Old people can be horny too.
I have seen the way your parents look at each other.
EW.
Why would you say that?!
Because annoying you is so fun.
Want to play BlackOps later?
Yes.
Hopefully the blood and gore can wipe the image of my parents being horny out of my mind.
February 14th, 2018 9:29 PM
Thank you for the flowers ❤️
No one’s ever given me flowers before.
Though I think six dozen roses might have been a little overkill.
You should have seen the looks the delivery driver gave me.
Happy Valentine’s Day, my love.
I’m sorry I didn’t get you anything.
I wasn’t really sure we were celebrating.
It is fine.
I know I am the better boyfriend.
That’s fucking rude.
You know there is a very easy way you could win back the title…
👓🏒81
You want me to wear my glasses?
Yes. And?
Your jersey?
You are so smart.
That’s all I have to do and then I’m the better boyfriend?
Considering I literally have never wanted anything more in my entire life, yes.
Fine. Give me five minutes.
🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻
March 1st, 2018 8:03 PM
Saw the score.
Tough loss.
I’m sorry ❤️
It happens.
How is California?
I saw Rose and some of her friends today.
She took me shopping and then we hung out at her new house, it’s huge.
I love that she’s so successful.
I’m sure you do.
You’re not still jealous of her are you?
I’m literally so gay and she likes to play dress up with me like I’m a Barbie.
There’s nothing to be jealous of.
Except that she can hang out with you in public.
And hang all over you like she has some claim on you in every photo I see of the two of you.
She’s just a really touchy person.
It’s not that big of a deal.
Of course it’s not.
Game’s about to start.
Call me tomorrow?
Sure.
March 2nd, 2018 2:42 PM
Hey, sorry I missed your call, I had phone meetings all morning with sponsors.
Are you doing okay?
Yes. Getting on a plane.
Talk later.
Okay.
March 3rd, 2018 8:17 PM
Call me after your game?
I feel like we should talk.
I think I am going out tonight.
I will see what time I get back.
March 4th, 2018 1:14 AM
I went out tonight.
Did you have fun?
No, I fucking didn’t.
I was miserable.
All I wanted was you.
Is that a bad thing?
Yes.
No.
I don’t fucking know.
Are you drunk?
No. I feel like I should be, though.
Maybe this would be easier.
What would be?
Do you ever just think this might be too hard?
What are we doing, Hollander?
No.
Fuck no.
I don’t ever fucking think that.
What we’re doing is loving each other.
It’s that simple.
Don’t you dare, Ilya.
I’m not.
Not really, I just.
Fuck, Shane.
This sucks.
I just want to be with you all the time.
I love you so much, I don’t know what to do with it sometimes.
It is harder than I thought it would be.
You hung out with Rose, and we have felt off the past few days.
I thought maybe if I went out like I used to, I might feel better, but I didn’t.
I just felt worse and you’re not here and tomorrow is the anniversary of my mother dying and I’m just fucked right now.
Shane?
I get you’re probably mad at me. I swear I was not trying to give up.
Not really.
I love you. I just feel like I make it all worse sometimes.
Please say something.
March 4th, 2018 7:22 AM
Open your door, asshole.
March 4th, 2018 10:51 AM
Thank you for coming ❤️
Of course.
It’s nice to get to throw my money around sometimes and hire private jets.
I love you.
But don’t ever even think about suggesting we break up again.
I am sorry.
I was struggling a bit.
I know.
But you don’t have to go through it alone.
Not anymore.
Not ever again.
I am never giving up on you.
Ever, Ilya Rozanov, do you understand me?
I understand.
I love you.
I love you, too.
Also, I stole the shirt you had on last night.
Needed something that still smelled like you.
That is fine.
I stole more of your underwear, so we’re even.
I love that I still have no idea if you’re joking or not.
❤️
May 7th, 2018 10:19 AM
Did you seriously send me flowers with a card that says ‘Sorry for your loss?’
Hmm.
That does sound like something I would do to my boyfriend when he loses in the first round of playoffs. 🤔
You’re the worst.
Well, technically I am not because I am still in the playoffs.
🖕
Go make me proud.
Pfft.
As if I could do anything else.
😘
May 13th, 2018 6:48 PM
Hey, no matter what happens tonight, I’m so proud of you.
You’ve made that team into something great, and I can’t imagine how hard it’ll be to leave.
So, if this is your last game there, I just want you to know how much you mean to me and that I love you.
And that I can’t wait to start forever with you in Canada.
I will be fine ❤️
It is bittersweet, but I am ready to come home.
Home to Boston?
Boston hasn’t been home for almost a year.
Oh.
Fuck, you’re going to make me cry.
I prefer making you cry for other reasons.
Soon.
Really fucking soon.
June 23rd, 2018 8:18 PM
Fuck, I always forget how hot it is in Vegas.
And not in a fun way.
And wearing a tux doesn’t help.
Want to blow the ceremony off?
I could suck your dick in a cold shower instead.
No.
Here is what we’re going to do.
We’re going to sit in our seats, and then go to the boring party.
And then, when you have been waiting all night, you will come to my room and then maybe I will let you do more than just suck my dick.
Shane Hollander.
I’ll make you a deal.
If I win the Ted Lindsay tonight, I will blow you, fuck you, whatever you want.
And if I win?
I’ll have to let you know.
Good luck tonight.
😉
I have taught you too well.
June 28th, 2018 1:56 PM
Landing in half an hour.
Tell your pilot to hurry up.
I will get right on that.
Please tell me you brought the Land Rover instead of the Jeep.
I cannot handle the embarrassment of riding in that thing again.
There is nothing wrong with the Jeep.
And the only reason I have the Land Rover is because of all the luggage.
It has nothing to do with your whiny ass.
❤️
You love me so much.
I do.
Again, hurry the fuck up so I can hug you please.
🫡
Hollander Party of 4
July 5th, 2018 4:45 PM
Are you ready to be sick of me?
Yuna
We could never.
David
Not possible, kiddo.
Good, because as of this afternoon, I am officially an Ottawa Centaur.
Yuna
🎉🎉🎉
The BEST news!
David
Thank god, I finally have a permanent puzzle buddy.
Shane
Canada will never be the same ❤️
Yuna
We’re coming over to celebrate.
We’ll bring the food and champagne.
See you boys soon!
Shane
Uh, maybe give us a couple of hours, mom.
We have some things to do first.
Yuna
But honey, you’re just hanging out at home aren’t you?
😏😏😏😏
David
Don’t worry, boys. Just call us when you’re ready.
Yuna
Oh. Right.
Yes, please call.
Shane 😘❤️❤️❤️😘🍆
July 20th, 2018 4:29 PM
Are you done with your swim?
Yes, just drying off.
Are you okay?
More than.
Just get in here, please?
I already opened myself up.
Shane Hollander.
You little slut.
Having 24/7 access to your dick is not healthy for me.
I love it so much.
Get. In. Here.
Your demand is my command.
August 17th, 2018 8:10 AM
Ilya.
You’re moving today.
To Canada.
Two hours away from me.
All year long.
Ilya, it’s happening.
It’s really real.
I love you so fucking much.
Come fuck me on your new bed please.
I’ll be home soon ❤️
Wait for me there?
Always.