Chapter Text
5:53
The bathroom tiles were slightly damp. The hospital pyjamas he was wearing were far too thin and did nothing to protect him from the cold seeping up from the floor.
With every passing moment, his heart beat slower, echoing somewhere in the distant reaches of his mind.
He took one last breath and closed his eyes.
Darkness.
A white flash made him think it was all over.
But for some reason, what came next wasn't death. Instead — a yellow flash. Then red, orange, pink.
Lights of different colours, alternating with stretches of absolute darkness.
Why won't this end?
The pills have already been swallowed. The goodbye has already been said.
Why won't they just let him go?
Why is his brain remembering this, of all times, right now?
A yellow flame flared brighter before it vanished.
——
— Sakura-san! We're going to be late!
The aforementioned boy simply rolled his eyes, continuing to eat some kind of bun that the owner of "Cactus" had given him.
— Don't care. You can go without me.
— No way!
Why was he getting so worked up about it. Sakura is late often — sometimes on purpose.
— Sakura-kun, you're the class captain, you know. We need to go.
Boring.
Why did they even make him captain. He has to get up and follow the others now.
— Sakura-san, hurry up!
The three of them bolted from the spot. And Sakura doesn't know why, but he ran with them.
——
— Haruka, it's bad to neglect your meals.
Does he even have a choice? He's a terrible cook, and eating out at restaurants all the time is expensive.
— You could come over to my place after school to eat. I don't mind.
Both of them turned red at the same time.
What an idiot. But the offer was tempting.
— Thanks.
They went on eating in silence.
It was already late. He should be heading home soon.
— Won't you stay?
Momijikawa asked it with a hint of hope, but Sakura couldn't accept this either.
— I need to go home.
But why? No one is waiting for him there. There's only the dampness, come from who knows where, the darkness, the silence.
Loneliness.
Sighing wearily, he thanked Sakae and stepped outside.
The wind blew pleasantly through his hair, and Sakura felt just enough strength to get through the next day.
Maybe things would get better? Maybe he wouldn't think every single day about ending it all?
A smile graced his pale, snow-white face.
——
— I'd like to introduce you to my family. They would like you. They'd accept you as their own son!
Out of nowhere, Momijikawa suddenly said this. Sakura was lying with his head in his lap while Sakae gently stroked his hair. Neither of them spoke.
— I doubt your parents would be happy that you're dating me.
He pinched his nose.
It hurt. But it passed after a second.
— I'm telling you, they would have loved you.
If there had been any point in arguing, Sakura would definitely have started to answer back, but in all the time he'd spent together with Sakae, he'd learned that Sakae always stood firmly by what he believed.
Maybe, thanks to him, Sakura had learned to give in to others, just a little.
Haruka buried himself somewhere against his shoulder.
— Whatever you say.
——
— You and Momijikawa are dating?!
They hadn't meant to tell them, but they hadn't been hiding it either.
It was just that they'd been spotted holding hands.
Niirei was in an uproar. Shouting loudly and excitedly and asking all kinds of questions.
Thank you, Sakae, for being able to answer those.
Sakura was in no state to reply.
Besides, this whole walk had, unfortunately, only happened because of him — on a day when it was hard for Sakura just to get out of bed to eat or drink some water.
— Niirei-kun, maybe you could ask those questions directly to Sakura when we're back in the classroom? I think we might be bothering them a little.
Sometimes Suo didn't annoy Sakura.
— Besides, what if our captain turns out to be the really jealous type and ends up holding a grudge against you!
…but the rest of the time he annoyed him immensely.
— Don't worry. Haruka and I are just fine when it comes to that. If you'll excuse us, shall we be going?
He doesn't deserve him. Sakura knows this, but he keeps on clinging to him desperately, as if he were his only lifeline.
— Of course. Enjoy your walk, Momijikawa, Sakura.
They quickly headed off somewhere. It was quieter here than on the busy streets of Makochi.
— Do you want to talk?
——
His brain — it's such a strange thing.
He knows he's dying, so why does it need to do this?