IDontGiveMuchShit_ImConstipated



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    He has no idea what you're supposed to say when you find one of your...werewolf acquaintances, completely out of their mind, growling like they're about to see what your insides taste like. There's no handbook for this. Stiles is thinking that if he survives he might write one.

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    27 Dec 2025

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    “Interesting, interesting. Brave enough to be in Gryffindor, loyal enough to make Helga proud and cunning enough to be a wonderful addition for Slytherin. Where should you go?”

    “Ravenclaw.”

    ~

    Alternatively how Percy’s sorting goes cause he’s a menace and refuses to make things easy

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    23 Dec 2025

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    Lan Wangji opens his mouth. He closes it. He is blisteringly aware of how absurd it sounds for him to say, I am you, only happier. The truth, perhaps, is not always the best choice.

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    16 Dec 2025

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    For thirteen years, Wei Wuxian had been cautious. He hadn't done anything that could risk his new identify as Mo Xuanyu. He'd distanced himself from anything that had to do with the Clans he grew up with. Only for one coworker's sick kid to cause his past to come hurtling back at him.

    His past, of course, is named Lan Wangji. And this time, he won't let Wei Wuxian go.

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    02 Dec 2025

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    His phone buzzes again, and Lan Zhan picks it up this time. To his surprise, it's a message from the Blood Bank.

    The Blood Bank was a way for him to make money faster, beyond his usual teaching job, to help his mother. He tried not to think too much about the fact that there were random faceless vampires feasting on his blood.

    Frowning to himself, Lan Zhan clicks the message.

    "You have been selected as a special provider for a very prestigious client! The Yiling Laozu has chosen you to be a part of his regular collaborators!"

    Lan Zhan raises an eyebrow when he sees the name.

    Very few vampires are known amongst humans, because they keep well hidden, but Yiling Laozu is one of the most well-known ones.

    -

    Lan Zhan's blood gets the attention of a vampire who is well known to the entire world for his creations: Yiling Laozu. At the same time, a beautiful man he meets on a rooftop tries flirting with him, his aura strangely alluring.

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    23 Nov 2025