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“Can’t you see that you’re lost without me?” by qpbromantic for VibrantVenus
Fandoms: Jennifer's Body (2009)
13 Oct 2023
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“It’s girl’s night, Needy. You know to tell Chip not to text or call on girl’s night. I want your attention all for myself.”
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Patrick didn’t have a diary, no matter how much Pete teased and prodded and bullied otherwise. It was a journal, okay?
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Needy dialed again, sniffing hard to try to unclog her nose as the line rang. And rang. And rang. And rang.
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Why push Patrick into the spotlight when he so clearly soaked up the attention like a flower to sunlight?
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“My luck fucking sucks,” Ovidio groaned, afraid to look away. The more he stared at it, the less it looked like a dog. Ovidio had never seen a husky that big or that ugly.
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Till is a normal 29-year-old man working a normal nine-to-five job in order to survive. Well, he isn’t entirely normal, since most men his age would’ve lost their virginity by now. He doesn’t mind being a virgin, though; it’s not like it’s severely affecting his life.
That is, until his 30th birthday.
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Or: After living for three decades without having his cherries popped, Till somehow gains mind-reading powers. He does not know the ‘hows’ or ‘whys,’ only that these newfound powers have led him to read his coworker, Ivan’s, thoughts. And, they are...a lot to take in. To say the least. / Cherry Magic AU
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 55,405
- Chapters:
- 14/14
- Comments:
- 143
- Kudos:
- 716
- Bookmarks:
- 112
- Hits:
- 12,296
Bookmarked by qpbromantic
08 Apr 2026
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Even if all of this was just practice for Mizi, even if it’s just an elaborate scheme specially designed to leave him heartbroken, even if it was just a ploy only a fool would fall for.
Ivan figured that he was nothing, if not a fool.
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‘Everything’s all right, even if it’s not for me at least it’s my arms he’s in. Even if it’s not love, at least it’s close.’
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“So, you don’t want to kiss a man anymore?”
“I didn’t say I changed my mind about that,” Till replies. “I’ll just ask someone else.”
“Just try it,” Ivan says. The words are sweet, but the sheer amount of venom in them is nothing if not a warning.
whenever till kisses men, they always mysteriously vanish in the next few days. he knows why that is. but the thrill of the chase is much too fun to give up.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 21,643
- Chapters:
- 3/3
- Comments:
- 230
- Kudos:
- 3,452
- Bookmarks:
- 706
- Hits:
- 52,315
Bookmarked by qpbromantic
09 Oct 2025
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Forced by his PCP to finally see a gynecologist, Till takes the recommendation of a good friend. Unfortunately, it's fucking Ivan.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 16,428
- Chapters:
- 6/6
- Comments:
- 146
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- 2,460
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- 380
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- 42,837
Bookmarked by qpbromantic
05 Oct 2025
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“We should have sex,” Ivan says brightly.
Till glances up at his halo, horrified. “Are you asking me to kill you?”
till is terrible at being a demon, but he’s even worse at getting rid of the annoying angel who’s been following him around since they were kids. being in love with him probably doesn’t help.
Bookmarked by qpbromantic
05 Oct 2025

