Archive of Our Own

Bagi had no clue as to why she said yes on a whim to Tina asking if she could come over to her place. Just to organize outfits for their performances, she says. And yes, Bagi did like that idea; Tina was the fashion designer for their band, after all. It would be nice to have some presentable outfits planned. Bagi agreed like it was just a normal outing of them hanging out; other girls did that all the time, right? Casual friends did that, didn’t they? And that’s what they were becoming- right?

Except Bagi forgot about her younger sister at home, probably just minding her own business and doing her homework as usual at the dinner table and completely unaware of the guest Bagi was about to bring over unmentioned. The sister she hadn’t told Tina about yet; the sister that didn’t push Bagi to talk about the band much but gave her curious starry-eyed looks everytime Bagi talked about the band. Or Tina. 

The sister that she hid and didn’t mention a lot because of the weird looks she got when mentioning being a guardian for a twelve-year old, even with their family’s circumstances. But even if she tried to explain it and everything that’s happened, it would probably end up being worse.

So, yes. There’s a chance Bagi was fucked.

But it was too late now, her feet wearing down the familiar path home with Tina right by her side in the evening after their rehearsal, the night right before another performance they had. Since it wasn’t too cold yet and Bagi was doing her best to save on gas, she had chosen to walk to their practice while Tina joined her and Fit took their car home after they had finished. Tina was looking around the neighborhood with a grin, eyes glowing as she babbled on without noticing Bagi’s tension as her eyes studied the houses around them, “I recognize these roads! I’ve been down them before, I think. They’re really nice! I think I actually live a few roads down!”

“Really?” Bagi mumbled, half-listening and the other half still spiraling and coiling out of control with the thoughts of her sister waiting for her at home. Her hands were white knuckles in her jacket with the clench they had, long hair curling around her face to hide the pale blotches of fear accenting her cheeks. “That’s, uh… That's cool.” 

God, I wish I could act cool. I wish I wasn’t so fucking terrified of this. Why is it scaring me this bad? She felt a tight frown tugging at her lips, shaking her head at herself. Act tough, Bagi; that’s what she knows. Don’t let her know that this scares you.

Tina finally seemed to sense Bagi’s tension with the way she was holding herself, her smile still on her lips but waning a little with her squint. “You’re okay with this, right? I know it was sorta last minute.” Adding on to what Bagi had mentioned before their walk, Tina added with a small laugh, “I really don’t mind if your place is dirty; trust me, I’ve seen worse.”

It’s a little too late to get you to go away. But I don’t have the heart to send you away anyways. Bagi shook her head with a small huff, adjusting her thick brown jacket collar before shoving her hand back into one of her pockets to mess with the fabric in an attempt to self-soothe. “No, it’s cool. I just, uh… Didn’t tell the other person in the house about it.”

God, when was the last time I had a guest over besides Pac? She peered down the road, her heart thudding at the familiar soft blue exterior she could see closing in the distance. Her heart squeezed again at the thought, clutching the thick woolen part on the inside of her pocket. It’s too late to text her about Tina, so it’s just gonna be a surprise. I don’t know if that’s a good thing or not, though.

“Who else is there?” Tina asked to lull Bagi out of her thoughts, glancing over at her to see a curious but nervous smile on her face. Her eyes flicked out to follow hers along the street, her brow furrowing slightly at the faint flickers of the street lamps starting to flick on from the darkness around them. “Am I gonna disturb them?”

Bagi waved her hand, trying her best to soothe her and herself as she reassured her in a quick flurry of words, “No, no, it’s fine. She’s usually okay with moving out of the way if she needs to. But we can work around her; she’ll probably just be doing homework.”

There seemed to be a lapse in Tina’s steps when Bagi mentioned that, pausing as well when Bagi nudged in front of her to quicken their pace along the sidewalk and up along the empty driveway, heading towards the front door as Tina echoed quietly behind her in polite curiosity, “Homework?”

Shit. There’s one slip. Bagi’s heart was squeezing and thudding too much in her chest and ears to really acknowledge her question, pausing in front of the door she finally guided them to. The outside light above the door was on, casting a soft white halo of light down across Bagi’s shoulders and hair as she stared at the rusted knob. She swallowed, listening to Tina step up beside her and looking over to see her head tilted, eyes shimmering in wonder.

It’s now or never. Bagi squeezed her hand in her pocket again after a few moments of awkward lingering, using the other to fumble for her house keys as she cleared her throat beyond the jingling. She glanced beside her over at Tina, pressing her lips together tightly. Stop stalling. Just get it over with. “Okay. Uh. Are you ready?”

Tina turned her attention to Bagi as soon as she asked, looking unfazed by the worn walls and door and instead beaming at her with excitement and a small bounce on her feet. “Yeah!”

No judgment yet... A good start. Bagi’s heart twisted around again at Tina’s oddly comforting but welcoming air, folding in on itself as she took a deep breath and nodded, shuffling closer to her door. “Okay.”

Her hands trembled when slotting the key into the lock, almost dropping it as she twisted it with a solid click under her grip. She pressed her shoulder into it and felt the door slide with a skidding noise, boots thumping loudly into the entrance with Tina’s quieter and lighter steps beside her. It was the familiar setting Bagi was used to; the stairs off to their left leading to the small strip of rooms upwards, the living room beyond with a quiet hum of the TV being on and the kitchen off to her right around the corner facing the living room. Their dining table wasn’t in view, but she could hear soft humming underneath the television from within the house that made her heart both soften and pinch even tighter.  

Here we go. Bagi inhaled, finally calling through the house as she leaned back to close the door behind Tina stepping beside her, “Emi! I’m home!”

Tina’s eyes widened when Bagi glanced up into them while slipping her shoes off, still lingering by the door as she repeated with a hint of gentleness in her gaze and her whisper, “Emi?”

There was another call from further inside the house that responded back, Bagi nudging Tina’s wrist with her fingers in a quiet signal to follow as she guided their way deeper into the house. Tina’s boots quickly slipped off before she followed, the quiet pattering the same as Bagi’s anxious heart thudding around her chest. The lights brightened around the corner, swamping her and Tina into an orange glare from the dangling lights in the kitchen and above the table as she finally guided her bandmate into the dining room.

There sat Emi, her dark skin warmed by the glow and her curled brown hair cascading down her shoulders in a curtain of tangles. She had her cheek propped up by a hand, her elbow still resting on the table as she looked up from a dinner plate and a few pieces of paper with scribbles in writing below her, the imprints confirming the pages of homework she was busied with. Her eyes flicked up, accented in their familiar greeting until they shifted behind Bagi’s shoulder to Tina behind her, where they widened as she sat up taller in alarm.  

Tina let out a quiet gasp at Bagi’s side, Bagi unable to hide the tension that instantly sparked from her body in response. Tina didn’t move from where she was, but Bagi saw one of her hands fly up to her mouth briefly with her fingertips skimming her lips. “Oh!”

Emi’s body twitched along with her movement, shuffling in closer to herself in surprise. Her eyes remained unmoving from Tina’s figure, looking just as startled and entranced as she did. Her voice was quiet, the usual soft tone pitched slightly with her surprise, “Hello?”

Tina didn’t respond right away, her mouth still slightly agape and her eyes sparkling with many bounding thoughts Bagi was unable to catch. Emi’s eyes flicked between her and Bagi now, arching an eye at her flabbergasted sister clearly trying to find an explanation for everything. It made Bagi’s heart flip over a few times again, closing her eyes briefly with a stuttering inhale. It’s a horrible idea trying to make me the main spokesperson. Awful, really, that I need to take charge of it all.

Clearing her throat loudly again to try and calm her body’s tremors with her pounding pulse, Bagi mumbled towards her sister as she finally greeted, “Uh… Hey. Hey, Emi. This is Tina; she’s a part of the band I’ve mentioned.”

A knowing look flickered in Emi’s eyes and the small crook to the side with her head, Bagi feeling her ears heat up from the shimmer in her twinkling brown eyes as she added hurriedly, “She’s just gonna help me put some outfits together for our performances; we’ll be upstairs.” 

Don’t ask any questions right now, Bagi silently pleaded with her sister, meeting her eyes with the hint of desperation she could feel. She gave her the smallest shake of her head as well, hoping to convey her point across. Now is not the time. We can talk about this after.

Emi nodded slowly, relaxing her posture a little as she caught on but still giving Tina a wondrous look and unable to bring her eyes away from her. Bagi wrapped a hand around Tina’s arm lightly, trying to guide her back into their reality as she introduced with a slight edge in her voice, “Tina, this is Emi. She’s… She’s my younger sister.”

Tina’s gaze remained unwavering, but Bagi saw her bring her other hand up to her mouth to shut the gaping mouth there. At last, when Tina’s eyes flicked over to her still as wide as the moon, Bagi couldn’t help but remark quietly, “You’re not the only one with an adopted sibling.”

Emi blinked at the both of them, not catching Bagi’s mumble as she finally brought her gaze back down to her homework with a small furrow in her brow. But Tina was already nodding, smoothing over her mouth and taking a few steps towards her with a smile that seemed a bit too wide but filled with an adoration that made Bagi’s heart twinge slightly and pulsate with the twist. Don’t let it affect you. Stay strong.

“Oh my goodness…” Tina breathed out quietly before raising one of her hands, waving it shyly with her widened smile. She seemed oddly enraptured by Emi, her eyes glowing while she gazed at the younger girl. “Hi there! Hi!”

She took a few more steps towards Emi, the younger girl watching her with eyes still glowing in curiosity. Tina’s gaze flicked between her and Bagi, still seeing the older sibling’s tension in her shoulders as she relented on her steps but remained polite and pleasant. “It’s so nice to meet you! You’re so pretty!”

Emi touched the long curls of her hair rolling around her face, eyes flicking over to Bagi’s calloused hands from this morning’s hair session to try and make them nice. She gave Tina a small nod when her eyes returned to her, still looking a bit uncertain about it all but also seeming hopeful with the perk in her posture. “Hi…”

A few moments of silence passed, both of their eyes flicking to Bagi expectantly. The adult expected to lead the conversation was too busy with her spinning thoughts, however, her heart still thudding uneasily within her fingertips. Maybe this wasn’t a good idea. Shit. How do I- How do I save this? What should I do? It’s been fucking ages; this is so awkward.

Finally seeing the insistent and slightly bemused arch of Emi’s brow as her eyes flicked over again to Tina, her sister pulled her back into attention as Bagi cleared her throat once more with a small cough, bobbing her head in an odd muppet-like style with the tension lining her neck and shoulders. “Right, so… Uh… You had your dinner then, Em?”

Emi’s eyes flicked down briefly to the nuggets she had gotten out for herself halfway finished on her gray plate, another brief flicker of amusement in her eyes before looking back at her older sister. “Yes.”

I know what you’re thinking. Or what you want to say. Keep it to yourself, or I swear… I don’t need anymore teasing from my younger sister right now. The amusement certainly wasn’t appreciated, Bagi’s anxiety still working in overdrive as she narrowed her eyes slightly at her sister with her internal message as she kept her voice leveled to not let it leak out, “Alright, good. Need any help on your homework?”

Emi studied her for another moment before she shook her head, the silent message received as she settled back into her chair. She peered down at the worksheet she had before looking back up at Bagi, shaking her head once more in confirmation. “No.”

Thank you. Bagi relaxed a little, still swimming in the cloud of tension but being able to breathe a little more. She gave her sister a nod before starting a small back trek towards the stairs they passed, letting out a muffled hum. “Okay. Great. We’ll be upstairs then. Let me know if you need anything.”

Emi nodded, watching her sister go and was turning back to her worksheet with a small hum from herself. But before Bagi could climb the stairs or lead the way, Tina whipped her head around towards Bagi and extended a pleading hand to her, halting her there. “Wait, wait!”

Bagi froze, the entire room holding its breath again until Tina turned towards Emi, perking up with a small but hopeful smile accented by the kitchen lights. The next few words were quick, nearly passing by Bagi with the rushed invite, “Do you wanna come hang out with us?”

Bagi’s breath was kicked out of her gut and up through her windpipe in a sucker-punch she nearly choked on, inhaling sharply as she eyed Tina down with wide eyes. “What?”

Emi hadn’t responded yet, her eyes shooting wide again as Tina looked between them both with a small laugh. The anxiety was clear in Tina’s eyes, but her expression was insistent as she gestured with her hand towards Bagi’s clothes she had on before focusing back on Emi. “Well, we’re essentially playing dress-up with your sister! Do you like dressing up?”

Emi’s wide brown eyes blinked for a few more moments before she nodded slowly, now sitting up a bit more with a small smile on her face. She looked just as hopeful as Tina did now, the adult extending a hand out to her with a small grin. “Do you wanna join us, then? It would be so much fun with you!”

What? What is she doing? Bagi reached for Tina’s wrist again to wrap and squeeze, directing her attention towards her as she muttered in an undercurrent warning, “Tina, you don’t have to do this. She’s okay with hanging out elsewhere.”

Tina tugged against Bagi in protest, insistent brown eyes meeting the startled blue ones staring down at her. She shook her head, shuffling so she was standing more in front of Bagi instead of being off to the side as she smiled on with a hint of anxious pleading. “She doesn’t have to, though! I’m more than okay with her joining us!”

Tina gathered Bagi’s hands in hers as she spoke, turning towards Emi and completely missing the slight jolt in Bagi’s body and the flare of color starting to blaze through Bagi’s cheeks while she acknowledged Emi again with a grin as she repeated, “Would you like to?”

Bagi whipped her head up towards her sister, seeing the rapid nodding she had before catching her sister’s eyes. She dropped a little in uncertainty, making Bagi’s chest ache and a splinter of guilt starting to pierce through her chest. It’s not that I don’t want her to join; of course she can. I just don’t want this to be some stupid pity thing. We don’t like pity. I don’t want Tina to see us as a charity case or something.

She forced herself to squeeze Tina’s hands in return to catch her attention once more, voice slightly guarded but opened up as she affirmed one last time, “Tina, are you sure?”

Tina’s hands squeezed back in a similar pattern to hers, a two-time beat that was quick but recognizable as she nodded insistently against Bagi’s resistance. She was giving Emi a soft look doing so, a gentle smile wrapped over her lips. “Absolutely. I would love to have her with us.”

Bagi scanned Tina for the longest time, trying to find any trace of malplay or pity within her features. But all she saw was a genuine adoration, something deeper as well hidden within Tina’s eyes she couldn’t entirely decipher. She seems genuine enough… We’ve had our few little scuffles here and there, but… I think I trust her. 

So Bagi gave her a small nod even though she wasn’t looking, turning towards her sister now with a questioning tilt in her chin and a small nod with the approval of the invitation. “Emi? Wanna come along?”

Emi relaxed again with her sister’s allowance, slipping out of her seat and grabbing her empty plate as her movement sliced through the tension that had been in the room to let everyone else breathe a bit more. She nodded once more, her shuffling seeming a bit more upbeat than normal with the happy skip and hop she had going to the sink within the kitchen. “Sure, if I can. If that’s really okay.”

“Of course you can!” Tina reassured, the squeeze from her hands startling Bagi again with her smooth fingers brushing along hers. She finally let go after the last squeeze, a small hop in her steps again as she now started towards the stairs in the corner Bagi had previously guided her to.  

Bagi flexed her hands out from the ironclad grip she had on themselves, her heart still thudding around the birdcage in her chest as she let out a shaky breath. Her feet wouldn’t move right away, wavering in uncertainty and hesitation. How do straight girls do that so casually? How do they just squeeze their hands like that and not have the other’s touch lingering for days? Christ.

When Emi finished washing her plate and walked up to Bagi, a question in her eyes, Bagi reached down to rub her fluffy head reassuringly and for her own comfort with a quiet murmur, “Yeah, you can join us.”

Emi relaxed even more, eyes glowing in relief and excitement as she messed with a few curls in her fingers. She smiled up at her sister, Bagi’s heart melting through a little with the glowing expression on her face. “Okay.”

Bagi shared her smile, feeling her heart kindling a little for her as she reached out and ran her fingers through the curls she had worked through that morning once more. Emi giggled quietly and batted her hands away playfully, and Bagi rubbed her head more aggressively before stepping away with another flame of affection within her chest. If this all makes Emi smile as big as this, then maybe… Maybe I can give it a chance. 

“Perfect!” Tina called from nearby at the bottom of the steps, the two sisters joining her as she waited for them. When Bagi approached, she took a step back for her to lead the way up with a grin and a small bow that almost seemed playful with the small wiggle of her hips as she leaned down. “Let’s go up, then! Lead the way!”

Bagi glanced at her with a small huff and an arched brow, alongside a blush making its way over her cheeks, before looking down at Emi. She saw her excited taps of feet on the ground as she paired up right behind Bagi, taking a deep breath before starting up the fluffy stairs leading away from the slick floors on the ground floor. They ascended the empty hallway, only a few small images of their parents and the two girls decorating their climb up. Bagi saw Tina’s eyes drag out and study them, but was silently relieved when she didn’t question anything as they went up. 

I think we already have enough questions to fill the next two weeks. No more would be great. The first room was luckily their destination, reaching the top of the stairs and reaching for the handle of the first door in sight. Tina crowded up next to her, Bagi’s heart doing another somersault with her chin right up beside her shoulder and her breath gently brushing her cheek. She heard Emi tapping up beside them, her shoulder brushing Bagi’s other side while the door to her room opened with a click.

It was a mess of blacks and browns, a mixture of postures from many different eras and interests. There were few from different crime shows or book series Bagi indulged in revolving around murder mysteries or her general field of interest, another section dedicated to other punk bands that led her to her current music interest, spiraling around in a wavy pattern that blended the two interests together in a somewhat cohesive mixture. It was definitely an odd formula, but the soothing tugs of home lingered around in her room as she saw the small glimpse of waving trees from a gust of wind outside her window.

Bagi gestured to the entire room, stepping in carefully to the bed with thick black covers situated in the center, wincing at the few strews of shirts littering the floor. It would have felt a bit more welcoming had Bagi not been tense, waiting for the judgment as she directed, “Here we are. Sorry it’s not that tidy.”

“Oh, wow!” Tina stepped in after her, Bagi planting herself on her bed in order to watch Tina’s eyes sweep around the room in her wondering evaluation. Her eyes drifted over the many arrays of postures on the walls with her different themes, letting out a soft laugh in infatuation as her fingers reached out to brush against a few. “This is so neat! All of these posters… It’s like True Crime in here! Mixed with goth punk!”

She flashed Bagi a wide grin, one that startled her with the sincerity behind it as her fingers continued to coast along the corners of her plasters. “I actually love it. It’s so you.”

Bagi’s face burned bright once more with the compliment, her tongue tying itself up in her mouth as she swallowed to gain some sort of substance back in her throat. Good Christ. I don’t know how I’m gonna get through this. “Right. Uh. Thanks.”

Tina flashed her another grin, oblivious to the very flustered woman sitting on the bed as she strolled over to the closet taking over most of the wall with the door leading out to the house, where Emi was still standing and watching Tina with intrigue. Tina let out a hum of delight as she opened the doors and let her fingers run along Bagi’s clothes briefly, grinning. “Ooh, are these your clothes? Wow, you have so much! And it’s all so cute!”

She shot Bagi an impressed look over her shoulder, not helping in any way whatsoever to Bagi’s flustered state. She didn’t seem to notice, however, helping herself to sorting with Bagi’s silent acceptance when she didn’t comment on it. “You know how to style, it seems.”

Not exactly. I throw shit on and hope it looks good. But she took the compliment and went along with it, folding her hands into her lap and clearing her throat again to try and clear the tickling sensation running in the back of it and cascading down to her chest. “I, uh… Learned on the go. Don’t actually know how to style much.”

Tina’s eyes traveled up and down Bagi’s frame, the woman once again knocked mildly senseless with the obvious scanning before Tina shrugged again, snapping her fingers as she turned back to the clothes. “Well, I think you’re doing a fantastic job. This’ll be easy-peasy.”

Bagi caught a glimpse of Tina’s eyes fogging over in concentration, pushing her tongue into her cheek with thought as she started sorting through them and assessing her bearings. “Let me see here...”

Bagi wavered uncertainly on the bed, unable to move where she was even as Emi strolled over and sat beside her with a dip in the bed and a small nudge into Bagi’s rib cage. She was transfixed in watching Tina to notice or turn to her sister, watching Tina clear away some space on the ground to select an arrangement of shorts and jeans with different T-shirts and cover tops. She laid them all out first by tops versus pants, seeing the shine of black nail polish on her fingers as they tapped against her chin in further thought before moving around again. She had some sort of system going on in her head, but Bagi didn’t dare try to disturb it or get in the way as she saw the way the gears in her head clicked and moved behind the clouds of thought in her gaze.

Bagi’s mouth was dry, still watching her with what seemed to be an eternal flame spreading over her cheeks that wasn’t soothed at all by Tina’s fingers trailing over and organizing her clothes into small groups. It was only when Emi nudged her again a bit more firmly and gave her a pointed look did Bagi finally stumble out, “Uh… Do you need any help?”

Tina let out a hum and sent Bagi a dismissive hand wave, pointing down towards the clothes after waving her off while she continued searching around Bagi’s closet. “Just tell me if you like them or not.” She looked back briefly to assess the clothes she picked out before looking back up at Bagi expectantly. “Yes, no?”

“Uh…” Bagi tossed her legs up on her bed and swung herself onto the other side to get a look at the outfits, Emi crawling across the bed instead to look at the selection with shining eyes. Bagi saw the different mixtures of patterns and situations that Tina had put her outfits in, assessing them for a moment with a small frown in thought.

Some of these are outfits I think I’ve almost done before, or maybe even have before but don’t remember since it’s been a while. I hadn’t thought about some of those combinations, though… They’re a little out there, but I think it works. Bagi did one last sweep with her eyes and slotted the outfits away into her head before she finally nodded, speaking her thoughts out loud as she confirmed, “Yeah. They all look good so far.”

“Perfect!” Tina flashed her a grin before returning back to her outfit sorting, picking out a few more and muttering under her breath about some things that Bagi didn’t catch. Her eyes would stray up to Bagi’s occasionally, studying her for a moment in silence with a contemplative frown, and Bagi did her best to sit up and look as casual as possible when she did so. Tina would either smile or giggle, momentarily distracted by Bagi’s flustered self before setting back to her work, humming to herself.

Bagi pressed her lips tightly together watching her, feeling her body humming with the slightly tense yet also pleasant energy in the room. Her hands were starting to grow a bit restless, picking at her nails and twitching against her thighs, but the heaviness in her hips and the weights on her feet kept her planted on the bed. I wanna help, but I also… Really just like watching her go through this. Her thought process and everything, even if she isn’t speaking it out loud. It’s fun trying to figure out where her mind is. I mean, she’s going to school for this… 

It’s cool watching how her mind works. I just wish I didn’t feel so weird about it all…

Emi was there to distract her thoughts after a few moments of solo contemplation, nudging up against her sister as she noted in a very quiet voice so it wasn’t heard over Tina’s humming, “She’s nice.”

“Yeah…” Bagi mumbled absently, her hands still humming and twinging with her thoughts. She saw the way Tina’s shirt started hugging up her back, exposing a small sliver of skin right above her jeans, and Bagi forced herself to stare down at the gray hues of her own nail polish fading away on her hands with an even more insistent blush crawling over her features. My God. How do straight girls do all of this? How does anyone do this? This is so intimate. Christ.

Bagi could feel Emi’s eyes staring into the side of her head, silently willing her to look away as she hunkered slightly in embarrassment. But when she looked back over at her sister, ready to send her a silent glare as a reminder of their mutual promise, she instead saw Emi’s eyes back on Tina and raising her hand slightly to try and draw in her attention. “Miss Tina?”

Tina was startled by the formal address, swayed away from her organizing as she lowered her arms with a laugh. She shot Emi an affectionate grin, nodding to her. “Oh my gosh, that’s so weird! But also the best thing ever! You can just call me Tina if you want!”

Emi looked a little bashful as she nodded and lowered her hand, Bagi smiling faintly at her sister’s shyness as Tina strolled over and crouched slightly to meet her eyes with her own warm smile that melted into the crevices of Bagi’s heart to make it glow. “Hi sweetie, what’s up?”

Emi hesitated for a moment, eyes flicking to Bagi’s for a moment. Bagi blinked back at her in confusion, unsure of her thoughts with the way her brown pools swam in hesitation, but was instantly tugged out of it with a faint twist in her heart as Emi turned back to Tina and inquired hopefully, “Can you help plan some of my outfits too?”

Bagi felt a small sputter in the back of her throat, her mind drifting to one of their weekend activities of assorting Emi’s outfits for the week as she widened her eyes at her sister. There was a faint trickle of hurt within her veins, but surprise mostly muffled the rest of what she was feeling. “What?”

Emi looked a little embarrassed by her request, shuffling on the bed but still smiling bashfully as she gave Tina her own admiring look that sent a whole new wave of anxieties rippling through Bagi. “She’s really stylish. I want her to help me.” Seeing Bagi’s wide eyes, she added in a hurried rush as she looked at her hands, “Just for this next week. Or for one day.”

Bagi was opening up her mouth to respond, but Tina beat her to it as her friend let out a small squeal in joy paired by a few rapid claps from her hands. She reached out and grabbed Emi’s hands, both Bagi and Emi jumping from the gesture but Emi not pulling away as the other woman gave her a brightened grin and enthusiastic nod. “Of course I can! Go grab some clothes and I can help you out!”

She hesitated for a moment before glancing up at Bagi through the top of her eye, a faint smirk on her lips and a teasing twinkle in her eyes that sent Bagi into a much deeper spiral she had no time to dig through or fall into with Tina’s gently teasing words, “Since it sounds like your sister isn’t good at it. I can provide some assistance.”

Bagi finally jolted into more attention, her face still blazing with heat as she let out a weak sputter in protest and reached out to lightly smack Tina’s arm, “Hey! I do a great job!”

Tina giggled with an arched brow in skepticism, Bagi reaching out to kick at her leg this time and send her away with a few more giggles as her hands threw themselves up innocently. Emi, however, looked a bit more panicked and apologetic as she turned to Bagi, anxiety peaking in her eyes. “Oh, I didn’t mean-“

Nope. None of that. Bagi reached forward to rub Emi’s head again, making it more vigorous to send a shower of brown curls down her face as she cut her off with an affectionate murmur, “You’re fine, pancake. Go on, go get some clothes.”

Emi relaxed in relief seeing her sister’s insistent nod, giving her a bright beam before slipping off the bed and hustling out towards her room down at the end of the hall, happy thuds heard the entire way down. Bagi smiled listening to her go, her chest twisting faintly with the noise and the joyful shimmer she had surrounding her. I can’t remember the last time I saw her this excited about something.

Bagi glanced up to see an affectionate look from Tina being sent her way, doubling her face back into a cloud of blush as she glowered at her in return but couldn’t wipe the smile off her face. “Fuck you, by the way.”

Tina seemed unfazed, her grin widening instead as she shuffled back towards Bagi’s clothes while carefully maneuvering the outfits she had selected for her into a specific portion of her closet. “The nickname Pancake is adorable. Your sister is adorable. I adore her.”

“She’s the best,” Bagi agreed in a small chuckle, letting her heart blossom with love as she gazed out towards where her sister had disappeared. She let her fingers drift over her chest, where her heart seemed to glow from the touch. So patient and kind, loving and understanding. She’s been the best thing to happen to me and the thing that’s kept me going after losing our parents. And everything with… With Cellbit. 

Bagi could feel Tina’s eyes sinking back into her, glancing up at her to now see a bit of hesitance within them. Her fingers were resting against one of Bagi’s black jackets, her lips pressed together a bit more as she finally questioned carefully, “Why didn’t you tell us about her sooner?”

Oh boy. This question. Bagi felt a bit of the pleasant energy within the room thin out, the tension clouds starting to roll back in as Bagi exhaled slowly and kept her eyes askance from Tina’s questioning ones. She rested her chin in one of her hands as she propped an elbow on her knee, letting out a small hum as she regarded her answer warily, “Well, Pac knows about her of course. But I just- I dunno. I guess it’s…”

She faded for a moment, her heart aching a little with the image of her other sibling flashing into her mind. Her lips pressed tighter together, frowning a little at the glimpses of life over the last few years flicked through her mind as she finally concluded, “Protection, of sorts. To protect her.” And to protect myself.

“Oh,” Tina murmured, Bagi finding the courage to glance back up at her and see the understanding in her eyes. It almost seemed a little too thick, seeing her eyes clouding as she looked away from Bagi and back down at her hands with a slow nod. “Yeah, that makes sense. I think I can sort of relate in some ways. Or at least understand.”

Does she? Bagi could feel herself frowning from the look in her eyes, uncertain about the thoughts brewing underneath but still feeling a prickle of unease along her skin still. She propped her chin up again, unable to stop herself from the small leak of bitterness into her words as she adhered, “You don’t have to pity us like this, though.”

Tina blinked out of her stupor, looking alarmed as her eyes met Bagi’s again in confusion and a purse of her lips. “Huh?”

Might as well figure out now what her intentions are with all of this. Whether she’s sincere or not about her intentions. Bagi waved her hand towards where she could hear the shuffling of drawers and the closer in Emi’s room, her heart forming a shield once again as she jerked her chin up in a protective glower in Tina’s direction. “You don’t have to- To include her in all of this if you feel forced to or see her as some sort of project, if that’s what this all is. She’s very polite and sweet, but she knows to keep her space if she needs to. She’s not looking for any of that pity; neither of us are. You don’t have to include her just because you pity her or me.”

Tina gaped at her, looking shocked alongside a glower of hurt that made the guilt splinter from before pulse a little more in Bagi’s chest. Tina’s hands hung up the clothes she had in her grasp as she turned her full attention to Bagi, frowning much deeper now. “Do you really think that’s what this is about? Pity?”

The intensity of her stare made Bagi back off slightly, her shoulders still tense with uncertainty but her teeth gritting a little while she held what little ground she still had. It was a little startling seeing the passion behind Tina’s eyes, but Bagi gripped onto the stance she had with the image of her sister in her mind. I don’t want you hurting my sister if you have any different intentions. Hurt me all you want, I don’t care. But now that you know my sister, you can’t hurt her. Not if we wanna make whatever is between us work.

She met Tina’s eyes as best as she could, seeing her injured expression while she responded with another hint of bitterness, “I don’t know. I get a lot of weird fucking looks when I have to explain that I’m her legal guardian.” She shrugged, meeting Tina’s eyes now directly as the energy snapped and connected between their gazes. All of it was held in between, unable to let either of them look away while Bagi frowned her way. “I just don’t want anything to get misconstrued in whatever you mean by all of this. And I don’t want my sister’s feelings to get hurt at the expense of all of this. I don’t care what happens to me, but you’ll wanna wish for some sort of mercy if you or anyone ever hurt Emi.”

Tina’s eyes softened over a bit with her words, the zap of charged energy now wavering away in a more peaceful hum as she looked away with a small line in her mouth. Her eyes flickered close briefly, taking a deep breath before looking back up at the girl assessing her from the bed. She almost looked a bit more nervous now, Bagi surprised to see a hint of red tickling her ears.

“Bagi, I…” Tina paused for a moment, regathering herself before meeting Bagi’s eyes again with a faint but genuine smile as she rested back against the wall next to the closet. “I really like her. And I like you. You’re my band member and my friend. I hope you know that none of this is out of pity.”

She took a small step closer to Bagi on the bed, her hands tucked behind her. For once, making Bagi’s heart fumble around a little, she could see a hint of nervousness within her eyes as she crouched down. Her legs were frogged out, balancing back on her heels while she crouched to meet Bagi’s eyes with a gentle but firm warmth. “I want to get to know her and you; this was one way I could think of hanging out with you and having it be beneficial for you somehow. I know you’ve had a rough time with things, and I just…”

Her voice faded off, telling now how hard Bagi’s heart was pounding now that it was the only noise in her ears within the silent room. But Tina caught right back on track, giving Bagi another small smile and a genuine shimmer in her eyes. “You’re so strong, Bagi. And I really admire you. I want to be your friend, and I want to help you. In any way I can to show that I care. And I’ll do whatever I have to in order to prove that and prove myself to you and Emi. Yeah?”

Well… Shit. Bagi was choked up, not driven to tears but feeling the deep tug within her chest that strayed close to emotional territory. She met Tina’s eyes with her own wide ones, her breath taken out of her as she finally found it within herself to nod back in response. “Yeah… Yeah. Thank- Thank you, Tina. That… Really means a lot.”

Maybe she is genuine, A hopeful part in her brain finally chimed in, a bell of hope tolling around in her thoughts and making her chest ache a bit further. Maybe she really does care, and maybe this… Maybe I can actually let her in. Maybe she’s actually good. God, I really hope so.

Tina smiled back in return, hesitating for a moment before reaching out and squeezing Bagi’s hand with her own. It was a much softer touch than when their hands connected downstairs, this one much warmer and intimate as Bagi could feel every trace of skin touching hers in an acute and blaring awareness. “Of course, Bagi. That’s what friends are for.”

Friends, Bagi’s brain echoed, toying around with the word as her heart and mind jumbled with the emotions there. She could tell there was a hint of disappointment within it all, but the gratefulness that came from her speech before was enough to course through and settle most of it away in the back of her head. I don’t know what all of those emotions were, but… I don’t have time for them right now. I don’t want to think about them. 

The fact that Tina is even showing her support at all and being so welcoming towards Emi… It’s enough. It’s more than enough.

Still, Bagi found herself leaning towards Tina with a thundering heart despite her better judgment. Luckily, before she got too far to be noticeable, Emi’s footsteps started coming back towards them and gave Bagi an excuse to lean back and deter her attention, seeing her sister standing back at the door with an arrangement of clothes in her hands. She gave them both a bright grin, unaware of the emotional moment she had stepped into. “I’m here! I have clothes!”

Tina perked up, standing from her crouched position as she clapped her hands and extended them towards Emi with a dazzling smile. She looked just as she had been before, unaffected by the moment her and Bagi had as her attention was now directed towards the young girl with piles of clothes in her grasp. “Perfect! Oh, those are all so cute! Let me see them!”

Bagi relented as she let Emi and Tina take up the other half of the room on the other side of the bed, standing up and letting them babble to each other about the different clothes and outfits they sorted out. Bagi let her mind drift as her feet took her towards the closet with newly sorted clothes, her heart flickering faintly at the organization of it all and the thought put into how they were sorted. She studied them all with a clouded head, able to at least nod at the clothes sorted.  

These all look pretty good to me. A lot of them are from the old band Pac and I were in, but… They can be repurposed now. Her fingers drifted over them, a small smile on her face. I don’t think I’ve done any of these clothing combinations before, though. It’s giving them a new meaning now. A new little flare. That’ll be nice.

“Bagi?” Tina called for her attention, stirring her out of her thoughts as she blinked back into her room and glanced over at the girls around the corner. Emi was peeking over the bed, waving her hand with a smile while Tina peeked around the end of the bed with a smile, inviting her over with her own wave of a hand.

Bagi ducked around and went over towards them, blinking down at the display Emi and Tina were both proudly presenting to her with all of the different clothes arranged into pairs or assortments that looked pleasing to the eyes already, even just on the floor. She was unable to hide the small smile that crossed her features, her heart warm seeing the joy and pride in her sister’s face. “Aw, look at ‘em all. I love it; they look great.”

“Yay!” Tina clapped her hands, Emi clapping along with her with a small giggle. Tina beamed over at her before patting a few of the clothes around them with another grin. “Emi, do you wanna try some on? Make sure you like the arrangements?”

“Sure!” Emi brightened, then blinked over at Bagi with her smile widening and a plea in her eyes that made Bagi’s heart sink a little with the begging behind it, a knowing lurch in her gut. “Bagi, you should try some!”

Dammit. Not the begging eyes. She doesn’t use those often, and when she does… Bagi had the grace to try and fight it a little, rubbing the back of her neck prickling with warmth as she shrugged with a small cough. “Oh, I don’t know…”

“Do it with me!” Emi pleaded with her again, the round brown eyes in a faintly familiar pool that made Bagi’s heart crumple already. It had already been weakened by Tina this evening, but it was now fully checked out with Emi’s begging. She made sure to give her sister a pointed look, but her sister only stuck her tongue out through her teeth in a knowing grin. You’re lucky I love you so damn much, kid.

“Yeah! Do it!” Tina insisted, agreeing with Emi’s request as she sat back and propped her knees up so she could rest her arms on them with a smile.  She gestured towards the outfits situated in the closet, nodding once more. “It’ll be good to see them; I wanna see if I need to make some adjustments to yours.”

With Emi’s expectant and knowing look, alongside Tina’s hopeful shine, Bagi was outnumbered and overpowered within a single blow. She let out a small groan with her defeat, hands up in surrender as she moved towards the closet with the outfits. “Okay, okay. I’ll do it. Go on, pancake. Get changed in your room.”

Emi let out a squeal of excitement, grabbing her hands full of one of the outfits Tina had sorted for her before hurtling out of the room with another little giggle. Bagi rolled her eyes, bundling up one of the outfits and passing by Tina’s shining eyes as she made her way into the bathroom to change into her own outfit.

She assessed the contents she had as she put them on; a striped undershirt with a black t-shirt over it, the white rectangular pattern with the outline of a band on it making it all stand out and blend together well. A pair of black jeans had been selected, but placed on the hangers were an arrangement of chains that looped through the belt buckles she fed through. She rolled the other pair she had around her neck, studying her appearance with a few small blinks.

I’m surprised I hadn’t done this before. This is cute. She spun herself around in the mirror, propping out a hip to assess how the chains dangled along it. It was another moment of scrutinizing before she let out a hum, glancing down at her gray nails and the smudge of black lipstick still on her lips. Maybe I should change the nails, but I like the lipstick color. I could do some good makeup looks with this. Maybe Tina has some suggestions for that too…

The idea of Tina doing her makeup was enough to send her into a blubbering mess, her face burning as she opened the door and made her way out before she got too ahead of herself. She waited outside the door, waiting for her sister as she heard her hopping out behind her with a bright grin. She was wearing a golden dress with faint imprints of flowers along the design, a jean jacket with many different flower stickers imprinted on it tossed over her shoulders. She had thrown her hair up in a quick ponytail, but Bagi smiled warmly as she reached a hand out to let her fingers run through it. I could try and style her hair for this; I’ve seen a few cute braiding styles online that would look great with this.

Emi perked up with the touch, tilting her head up to lean into her sister’s touch as Bagi called out to Tina, “Alright, are you ready?”

“So ready!” Tina chimed from within the room, Bagi peeking around the corner to see her tucking her phone away and waiting with an expectant and enthusiastic grin. 

Bagi smiled in return, stepping around the corner and folding one of Emi’s hands in hers to tug her along as they made their way back into her room. Tina let out a loud gasp, her hands flying to her face as she was unable to press down the widespread grin that took over her face while her eyes shone with jubilee and adoration. “Awww, look at you both! Emi, you’re so cute! Look at you!”

Emi beamed, Bagi’s heart glowing even more with her sister’s confident and joyful smile as she took a small bow and hopped around in her clothes, grinning. “Thank you, Tina! I really love it!”

Tina giggled as she walked up to Emi, giving her a high-five while Bagi stepped away to let them giggle and laugh. As she did so, however, Tina quietly looped one of her fingers into Bagi’s belt buckles and tugged her in again, whispering into her ear with an obvious smirk on her lips, “You look damn good, Bagi.”

Fuck. Bagi’s heart was already gone for, now her brain swimming in the mushy pool her heart had dived into as she stammered out in response, “Hey! No swearing! Not in front of the kid!”

Tina let out another small gasp, unwinding her fingers from Bagi’s jeans as she reached over and pressed her hands over Emi’s ears. Her younger sister let out a squeal, giggling brightly as Tina exclaimed over the muffled ear covers, “Oh no! I didn’t say that! I didn’t say anything! Cover your ears!”

Emi continued giggling along with Tina’s lie, shaking out of her grasp as she gathered up the outfits still resting on the floor and hurried away again, moving them back into her room with excited hums and laughter. But as Emi disappeared from sight, Bagi felt a weight return to her shoulder as Tina whispered once more into her ear, “Seriously, you look damn good. The stylist only does half the work.”

God. You’re gonna be the end of me. Bagi did her best to retain some sort of dignity she still had, turning towards Tina slightly and giving her a ditzy smile beside numb lips and warm cheeks. “Thank you.”

Tina smirked back at her, giving her a small wink as she slipped away. And for a good chunk of the night, their little fashion show continued as Emi kept coming in to show off her outfits that Tina had picked out. Bagi was luckily spared from most of the scrutiny, instead becoming a part of her sister’s cheer squad with Tina as they praised the outfits she had sorted out. Only one more time did Emi get her sister to join in on her new outfit debut, Tina fortunately sparing her from any other flustering maneuvers as she simply complimented that she liked it and how certain jewelry pieces could accent it well. 

Bagi took the compliments in stride, giving Tina a small smile but going back into a comfortable jumper and sweats after her dress show to judge the rest of Emi’s new outfits alongside Tina again. But when Emi finished the last one Tina had set out for her, Tina had glanced down at her phone and then back up at Bagi with an apologetic and telling expression. Bagi didn’t waste anymore time, knowing the night had blown by as she helped Tina gather all of her things before she guided her back down the stairs and towards the front door.

Emi hovered on a few of the stairs, wearing one of the cute sweaters Bagi couldn’t remember she had alongside a pair of jeans that Tina had selected for her as she gave Tina an enthusiastic wave. “Bye, Tina! It was really nice to meet you!”

Tina waved back at her from the door, her smile still just as wide and bright as it had been the entire night. Her eyes were glowing, shining with affection as her smile filled the room with its own light. “You too, sweetie! You’re such a lovely lady; go show off those clothes tomorrow!”

“I will!” Emi cheered, catching the arch in Bagi’s eyes and the tap of her wrist to indicate the time. Emi giggled faintly, giving Tina one last wave before turning and heading up the stairs to prepare for bedtime instead with her muffled footsteps vanishing beyond.

Bagi rolled her eyes in affection at her sister’s excitement, opening the front door for Tina and leaning against it as Tina stepped outside. Bagi shot her a small smile, folding her hands into the pockets in her pants and resting her head up against the door. “Thanks again for tonight. It was nice.”

Tina smiled back at her, finishing the last tie on her boots before standing up tall and adjusting her purse, the fluffy black and white jacket she had taken off inside now puffed around her body in trilling insulation. She looked fluffed out and overjoyed, eyes shining even beyond her cheeks pressing them in with how wide her smile was. “Of course! It was so much fun; you have such a nice place.”

Her smile softened out, turning more sincere and making Bagi’s heart fumble once again in her chest as she added gently, “And Emi is such a sweet soul; it was so nice to meet her. Nice and sweet, just like her sister.”

Bagi was stirred off partially by her attempted compliment, letting out a disbelieving snort as she shook her head with a small eye roll. “Nah, she’s the only sweet one of the family.”

Tina offered her another smile, still small but sincere as she hovered in the glowing halo of their outdoor light against the darkness. “I wouldn’t be so sure of that. That influence has gotta be from somewhere, isn’t it?”

Bagi’s mouth grew numb again, tongue still tied within her own mouth as she tried to stumble for any words. But luckily, it seemed Tina was going to beat her to it as her expression turned even softer and hesitant. She glanced back at the house behind Bagi before looking back at her, fiddling with her fingers inside the pockets covering them. “Hey, uh… I don’t wanna overstay my welcome or anything, but… I would love to hang out with you more. Whether it’s here or anywhere. I had a lot of fun.”

She wants to come back? Bagi’s heart twisted in her chest, an unexpected curl of emotions that she did her best to keep in check of as she wavered for a moment. I don’t- I don’t remember the last guest that I had that wanted… To come back. Besides Pac. Was there anyone else?

Bagi shook herself out of her mind seeing the anxious flicker in Tina’s eyes with Bagi’s silence, giving her instead an insistent nod and her own small smile as she responded with sincerity and the faintest hint of longing, “You’re more than welcome to come back.”

The anxiety in Tina’s eyes faded away instantly, perking up with her smile widening a bit more. “Yeah?”

“Yeah,” Bagi repeated, smiling but feeling another nudge from the walls still placed around her heart as she paused for a moment. She glanced down the street before moving her eyes back to Tina with a hesitant smile once more. “Just… Don’t tell Fit about Emi yet. There’s still some parts of my life I wanna keep… Not private, but just-“

“Protected,” Tina picked up on when Bagi lost her words. With Bagi’s widened eyes in surprise but nod of confirmation, Tina’s expression continued to stay gentle with understanding as she looked down at her feet. The clouds Bagi had caught a glance of before appeared again, Tina’s voice lower than before but still filled with sympathy, “Yeah, I get that. I won’t tell him.”

Her eyes flicked back up to Bagi’s, a weak smile returning to her lips. “I’m glad you told me, I know how stressful that probably was. Thank you for telling me.”

Bagi’s heart smoothed over with more relief and gratefulness with her response, and she could feel a few of the walls set in place around her heart starting to crumple. Her own hands were taking them away, quietly starting to let Tina in as she gave her a breathless smile with a soft huff to try and make it all lighthearted instead of choking on her emotions. “Thanks for taking it well.”

Tina gave her another small smile in response, seeing the true meaning behind her eyes as she took a few steps back away from the door so she was rippling more in the shadows. There was a faint catch of light in her eyes, however, shining as she gave Bagi an excited look. “See you tomorrow then? For the performance?”

Ah, right. The real reason she came over. Bagi let out a small chuckle to herself, somehow forgetting that detail as she gave her a nod with more determination thrumming along to the beat in her chest. “Yeah. See you then. Text me when you get home.”

Tina nodded, giving her one last smile and wave before she started her way away, walking out. Bagi let her eyes trail on her for as long as she could, seeing the flashlight from her phone turning on to walk with before she quietly closed the door behind her with a gentle thud. As soon as she was inside, she pressed her hands to her face and ran the tips of her fingers through a few strands of hair, her blushing face returning for just a few moments as the night replayed in her mind.

Jesus Christ. Tonight did not help at all with these feelings I have for her. She rubbed her face even more, shaking her head with a quiet huff and another ache in her chest. She hasn’t mentioned yet if she’s into girls or not. I can’t assume I have a chance. Just be grateful you’ve got a better friendship with her. 

And she was, feeling the gentle warmth pouring through her chest. She touched it with her fingers, exhaling gently as the gentle pressure there from the night finally released. That is a weight gone, though. At least I don’t have to hide Emi from her anymore. That’s really nice. And she really liked her too, though I’m not surprised. Most people do. 

I’m glad though. I’m glad it went this well.

As if summoned by her thoughts, Bagi heard Emi’s steps on the stairs as her sister hopped back down, now in a set of blue pajamas that Bagi had a matching pair of as Emi leaned against one of the beams running along the stairs with a shining smile. “She was really nice! I see why you like her!”

Bagi’s face heated up a little with her words, glancing out the windows to look out towards the darkness again that Tina had ran into. She couldn’t see Tina anywhere, hopefully close to her location as she could only nod absently with her sister’s words. “Yeah… She’s nice…”

There was a long pause, one that made Bagi turn back towards her sister as she felt her eyes on the back of her neck. Her sister was giving her a knowing smirk, her eyes arched and a wider curl on her cheeks as she observed loudly, “You really like her, don’t you?”

Bagi’s face was already at its limit with heat, her heart as well checked out as she shooed her off upstairs with a hiss in protest. Emi danced away upstairs, her giggles heard throughout even as Bagi shouted up after her, “Alright, you! That’s enough! Get ready for bed! Go!”

Emi continued to trill in giggles, hustling away as Bagi closed out the downstairs with the lights flicked off. She paused once more beside the door that Tina had left through, clicking off the outside light and staring into the darkness with another tug in her heart.

Tonight was nice, I’ll give her that, Bagi admitted, touching her chest again with a small smile. She could feel small trickles of defeat, but they were overshadowed by the loss of tension around her shoulders in relief. Even if… I have some unconventional feelings towards her. I won’t let that get in the way of a good friendship. She’s a good friend. I just hope she’ll want to keep coming around.

She did a lot for me and my sister tonight. I can only hope I can thank her for it all someday. And I really hope now that she doesn’t leave. One of us doesn’t do well with others leaving.

Bagi blinked outside once more before smiling, listening to the current of water starting upstairs. She let her fingers trail on the glass before finally making her way upstairs, heading towards her sister with a new kindle of warmth in her chest and the faint buzz in her pocket from a text she was bound to smile at and dive into a conversation with later.